Hidden Signs of Borderline Personality Disorder
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- Опубликовано: 22 авг 2024
- Read stories from real people with BPD on our site: themighty.com/...
Read the article that inspired this video: themighty.com/...
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Guilty of apologizing a lot, I feel like I will never be able to repay the people that help me everyday and it almost haunts me.
William Siegner I know right? And it's like this vicious cycle, I apologize for feeling guilty, the apologize for apologizing when an apology wasn't needed then feeling awkward and apologizing about saying anything to begin with, then it just a downward spiral from there ugh it's so emotionally draining
Try saying "thank you" instead of "I'm sorry." Makes both parties feel better.
William Siegner yeah
Same here 😒 😞
I suffer from borderline personality disorder so I experience the same exact struggle/feelings & I definitely know what you're going through. It's hard & everyday is a constant, never-ending battle...everyday is a constant war within/with your own mind. I also suffer from major depression, bipolar ll disorder, panic disorder, severe anxiety disorder, OCD, and agoraphobia (fear of open spaces & going outside.) So in other words, I'm a wreck. Anyway, I didn't mean to seem self-absorbed & make this comment all about me & my problems, and I apologize if I came off that way. I just wanted to let you know that I can relate & I completely understand how you feel, what you're going through. etc. Take care. ☺ ❤💚❤
Holly S It sounds like you are being too hard on yourself. Many people talk about what they're dealing with. That is one of the disadvantages with BPD, it comes with a list of other stuff that we have to deal with.
Everyone in the comments is diagnosing themselves with BPD
Medikal weeed Medikal weeed Nop I don't have it. I can't even relate with those statements. And my partner would know if I had it. (Because he had a lot to do with BPD woman and has himself some Problems causing him to recognise BPD woman and a higher chance of finding them atractive like they find him atractive.)
because it is the most common personality disorder
I have BPD I was diagnosed by a professional. And I can relate to this video but there's a lot more to it then just this video.
I have bpd I was diagnosed by a professional and I show all of these symptoms
Medikal weeed I have been diagnosed with it, I would cures my self by diagnosing it.
Im not diagnosed with BPD but all of this, EVERYTHING is relatable...
Same.
bpd is like that. a lot of people have symptoms but very rarely realize what it's actually like to have it
Just something I remembered, and I don't know your age, but I remember reading that teenagers have a lot of symptoms of BPD, becuse of hormones, growing up, life crap, and brain changes of which symptoms disappear over time. I could relate to a lot of these points during my early teen years, so if you're in that age range then take that into account.
Regardless, if you have concerns about yourself you should get it checked out ASAP.
same...
and I am kinda woried...
Twili Fox you're just a normal human
Videos like these are in dire need of some sort of disclaimer that explains this is not a diagnostic tool, people without disorders experience these things from time to time, and that these are a few personal accounts from those who want to share their story or something like that. The comments all over the Facebook post of this video show what kind of confusion, invalidation, and frustration vague statements like this has been leading to. The mighty is supposed to represent people with disorders, and this is simply not a good representation, and it isn't the first video or post that I've seen that needs some serious reconsideration.
I completely agree, this video just seems to make the disorder seem like you are just a moody timid person. I have BPD and yes, on occasion I feel the things the video says but it dramatically simplifies how difficult living with this disorder is.
Midnight Riot I wish people would understand it depends on how severe and how frequent these symptoms are present in their lives plays out as well. Everyone really needs to go visit a therapist at least once even if they don't have any mental issues.
+Midnight Riot - Exactly, thank you.
Kellyann Navarre you definitely don't have bpd 👏
Kellyann Navarre I couldn't agree more. These could be signs of BPD, or a girl on her period, or someone who has anxiety, or someone who is literally just a somewhat of a shy human being. Most of these "indicators" everyone experiences in their lives, these videos are being used as a diagnostic tool by some people and it's a shame. While these videos are highly entertaining, they can cause people to believe they should have a diagnosis, when really all they are is a normal person with multiple emotions. My mom is a psychiatrist and the amount of people that self diagnose because of stuff like web MD, RUclips, celebrities self-diagnosing (some of which, like Demi Lovato incorrectly saying stuff like they're "kind of bipolar") etc. is astounding.
Don't use this to self-diagnose yourself. Literally everybody has done most of these things at certain points in their lives and probably has done them multiple times. If it is persistent behavior then you need to go to a therapist or psychiatrist so that they can make a proper diagnosis. You are most likely completely normal and suffer from depression and low self-esteem, which most people have issues with at some point in their adolescence or early adulthood.
I didn't even know any of these things were a sign of a disorder- just ask my friends, I've always done ALL of these things. I'm booking an appointment with my psychologist to talk about this because I never really knew these things were important mental health issues, so I never talked to her about them because i thought they were just weird personality quirks that I have always had.
psychomaniac26 yes but do you do all of these things 24/7 ten times a day or more?
Please don’t dismiss issues such as depression and low self esteem. They ruin so many lives all the time. People like you disgust me due to that.
psychomaniac26 With all due respect, having depression is FAR from being "perfectly normal" and the way you minimized it here is misleading. No offense. I'm not trying to be a mean commenter.
psychomaniac26 couldn't say it better myself mate!
I have all of these but I don't have bpd...
Lucy Mather pretty sure everyone does, to some extent or other. They are definitely not exclusive to BPD-diagnosed people.
You don't have to have a disorder to experience a level of the symptoms, it's the severity of the symptoms, the frequency, and the impact it has on someones life that generally allows professionals to make a diagnoses. Also, it should be said that many of these symptoms can also be side effects of many other disorders, so if any of them are disrupting your life it is strongly urged to seek professional help. Not solely for the diagnoses, but so that you can find healthier alternatives to these situations. :)
Lucy Mather me too
Dolce Luxe only they don't medicate a horoscope
Also keep in mind that the "science" of mental health disorders is almost purely subjective... In theory, a person could visit 3 or 4 different psych professionals for evaluation, and then receive a *different* psych diagnosis from each one depending on their "interpretation" of that person's symptoms.
Teenagers are just going to use this to diagnose themselves with borderline personality disorder. To everyone watching: it's very common to find that you have some or many symptoms of a personality disorder. This does NOT mean you have the disorder. You should never diagnose yourself. If you actually believe you may have a disorder, go get professionally diagnosed as these issues are very serious and debilitating
i mean, teenagers can also have this disorder
@@laural7373 That is 100% true. But many teenagers, including myself and several of the people I was close to in high school, have a habit of diagnosing themselves with anything and everything because they don’t have the same access to help that adults have. I commented this four years ago, though, and I don’t like my tone. I was 18 and mad at myself for all the time I wasted obsessing over disorders I didn’t end up even having. Calm down, 18yo me.
You cant get bpd diagnosed until youre 18 legally
@@borderline_sunshine yeah it sucks, I just want to know if I have BPD or not so I dont have to worry about it, I legit can not understand myself so I need to know so badly…
All very typical of teenage behavior.
Onset of BPD is usually early adulthood when navigating interpersonal relationships, as splitting is the hallmark sign and must be present.
I dated a borderline woman for 4 years. I knew something was off but never to the point of driving me away permanently. I learned about cluster B personality disorders after the brutal discard. I had no idea what happened. I thought I was just really patient but after learning that they view and react to the world on a childlike level it began to make sense. I teach grade school so I was used to dealing with problem children and their transgressions so dating a someone with BPD never really bothered me as it would do most. I always saw her childlike behavior the same way I viewed my students, “if I keep showing what healthy love and a healthy relationship looks like, they’ll someday grow up”. I was wrong, they cannot grow up without therapy. I was Devastated in the end because I could have done things differently if I had only known. This video almost made me cry because now I feel insanely guilty for not hearing her cries for help. If I had known then what I know now I could have help her. All her relationships before me were 6-12 months, we went 4 years. I take that as a point of pride in myself that I did good works in her life. I may never talk to her again but I will always carry the guilt of missing the signs. If I had only knew soon 😢
My heart is heavy after reading your comment .. i have BPD too but i appreciate the fact that you lived with her for 4 years thats a big deal and long time.. you are such a gentleman yess i feel guilty too for that you dont know that she is suffering from BPD. If you were there for her for 4 years treating her nicley then man if you had known what was the actual reason behimd her behavior today she will be enjoying her life with you .. proud of you but sad at the same time for her cuz i have a bpd yoo i recently discovered and will be soon getting sessions with psychologist .. iam a psychology student too 🥰🥰😅
A borderline woman? You're disrespectful and she's lucky she got away.
@@saraemily7397😂😂😂this is a borderline reaction answering and hij have BPD! And the men talking here I would say, get a life, trust me you can’t change the PBD mind or heal it no matter how you treat us good or bad our BPD will break you mentally!
@@jmjdev6663 unfortunatly that is thrue
if you got out without kids you've had a lucky break my friend
lol my mother has bpd and she does almost none of these. it doesn't effect everyone the same and it ruins lives, please stop diagnosing yourselves it's insulting.
+1
SHAZBAT414 I agree with you to some extent, that self diagnosis should be treated as a working hypothesis, but I do think a health professional should have the final say. I wouldn't even call it self diagnosis in that case, but rather, suspecting something may be wrong. It should be said that not all health professionals are always correct (especially regarding mental health), but generally, they are more likely to be able to deduce what's wrong, than the patient.
This is probably the way a BPD sufferer sees themselves (as the victim), but the rest of the world sees them as manipulators.
I'm almost certain my mother has undiagnosed BPD. She is controlling, manipulative and conniving. But of course she doesn't see herself that way. She is very, very sick.
SHAZBAT414 Some BPD sufferers pity themselves quite a lot, and use it as a tool to get attention, in an effort not to feel abandoned. Their worst fear is being alone.
However, some BPD sufferers, like my mother, are stoic and cruel instead. For example, if my mother feels even a tiny slight against her (such as a disagreement), she perceives it as me betraying and abandoning her. So instead she flips it and doesn't show emotion and "punishes" me by cutting me off, not calling me, turning family members against me with manipulations of the truth.
I used to fight it and get upset, call her up to tell her to stop being awful to me. She'd use the opportunity to scream at me and then still cut me off.
We've not spoken, on and off, for a collective 6 years of my life, because of the perceived betrayal and lies she tells herself.
Most recently it was 4 months and she reached out, wanting to meet with me. I told her I'd meet with her, only if she was ready to discuss her continuing to perpetrate psychological abuse, and to finally acknowledge the parental alienation of my father from when I was a child.
I didn't hear back. I assume it will be years until I hear from her again.
However, in saying all of this, she never truly feels like she actually needs me, because she routinely abuses my younger sister into having a codependent relationship. It's some really fucked up Grey Gardens kinda shit, I'm telling ya. I could have it much worse, I could be my sister.
Your mother sounds more like a malignant narcissist.
Has she officially been diagnosed with BPD?
No contact is the only way of keeping your sanity and recovering.
I am almost 53 years old, and I had a nightmarish, abusive and violent childhood. I grew up in a crazy, angry household, where every reaction to every single thing was magnified, and where there were no rational thought patterns or any discernible regulation of emotions. No emotional discipline at all. This learnt behaviour, from the violent parent in particular, denied me the tools with which to regulate my emotional responses and behaviour. And this has pretty much held me back all my life.
Suffice it to say, I have been alone all my life and have no children. I cannot hold onto friendships and have a very distant, fractious relationship with my family. I also have trouble keeping a job. However, I have only recently been diagnosed with Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, or, EID - Emotional Intensity Disorder - which is the term I much prefer. So I can relate to quite a few of the symptoms in the video, such as apologising all the time, feeling that nobody wants me around, my emotions spiralling out of control because I haven't yet got the mental and emotional distancing and challenging skills to calm myself down in time, and extreme self criticism and loathing. I also have clinical depression on top of this, or perhaps as a symptom of it, which means I am in a seemingly constant state of limbo or flux, where I can't reconcile myself as ever being a valued part of the world, and I have no appetite for life whatsoever. I'm not really living, just existing.
I am currently doing an intensive group therapy STEPPS course, which helps you to manage your emotions from spiralling, to recognise the unhelpful and long established thought filters that can trigger those extreme emotional responses. I am on my sixth week - just two hours a week but, trust me, it's enough - and although it's hard work, and we get homework as well, it's quite empowering in that it's making us feel responsible for our own healing and emotional management.
Personality disorders can't be cured - they're far too entrenched in a person's psyche - but they can be managed. It's early days yet, as there are 20 sessions in this course. Over the last 20 years or so I have had all kinds of therapy - 1-2-1 talking therapy, CBT - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - but nothing has worked because it was just skimming the surface. But now, with this intensive and very specifically structured group therapy, I feel that I may be getting somewhere. Maybe. Like I said, it's early days. But one thing I do know for sure, and that the whole group can agree on, is that we are not alone with this. And that is somewhat reassuring. For now anyway.
I was diagnosed almost a year ago with BPD, I also suffer from bipolar disorder, PTSD, depression, and anxiety, and I can say alot of this for me is true but they are complete and utter blanket statements. Everyone feels these things. I hate stuff like this. Its going to make everyone think they have the disorder just because they feel these things when in reality everyone does at some point. You can't put blanket statements over a serious mental illness like this.
Alessandra Leigh THANK YOU! I agree.
Partly agree. The difference is just that BPD (at least in my case) pretty much feel and react like this 24damn7.
Alessandra Leigh i agree. these aren’t the traits and are almost like relatable teen things that can be connected with other mental illnesses or probably to people without mental health issues such as being quiet etc. the way it’s portrayed is definitely questionable
@@annesofie5945 I hope you have treatment by now ?
I have BPD and watching the video hit close to home. As to everyone in the comments, these are not BPD exclusive things. Many people feel these all the time despite whether or not they have BPD, however they are most common if you do have BPD and they are INCREDIBLY strong feelings. It's something that seems like the biggest issue in the world. That's where the difference is.
being borderline is hell, endless punishment.
mallory amen
feel u
EVERYONE has experienced some bpd symptoms to an extent. however, when it affects everything you do/your functioning in society, that's when it's diagnosable as bpd
Don't normal people feel all of this too!??? :/
Erika Love well. I don't know cuz I'm not normal. but but, it's more of a fear of being alone so you push people so they don't leave. or the people that won't leave u , you idealize them. you tend to hold grudges for years, and obviously to get mad a lot. fortunately I am borderline and introvert so I don't seek that much socialization, still not nice. but a breakup is hell, more when it's your own fault. and yes, everything surrounds around other people, which sucks .
Definitely, I have BPD and this video extremely simplifies the difficulties with living with it
Pikachu Love do "normal" people suffer them to the point of suicide?
SHAZBAT414 its a catch all term for depressive illnesses used by a lazy medical establishment.
David Fragoso its a broad catch all term, they seem to diagnose majority of significant depressive illnesses as BPD now, I have been diagnosed with it but I don't have a fear of being along, for example.
if you attempt suicide and aren't bipolar chances are they'll "diagnose" BPD.
its a term for a lazy health service
Even if you can relate to a lot of these things, it is okay to speculate (is that the right word?) that you might have this disorder, but never just assume you have the disorder just because you have the symptomes. Get a proffesional to figure that out. Don't say you have a disorder when you're not 100% sure. It's an insult to people who actually have the disorder.
we're good people, nice, loving, and caring. i wish more people could know that we are loving friends and appreciate friendship and relationships more than anything else in life.
Right??? Like I actually genuinely want to get better, I just don't know how. That's why I need professional help. Even seeing an LPC is a good start if you're in college because a lot of the time they have those and they are licensed to provide therapy/counseling. Depending on the state you live in, they may be able to diagnose as well! Sending love
@@bigtimefans100 I think the best option is definitely staying consistent in therapy even when you get to the point where it feels like its no longer needed. It always comes back unexpectedly and feels horrible knowing it couldve been prevented. I wish you the best of luck :)
don't self - diagnose. if you are having a rough time, go talk to someone. if that doesn't help you should get professional help. You and your mental health are important. please, talk to someone about it❤
Been diagnosed for 3 years now, and it's been hard to cope, but a little easier now that I know I'm not alone. I am embarrassed and became a true introvert due to it, as it's so easy for me to cry in front of people over things that aren't just stressful or scary. Just someone giving me a compliment, seeing a cute baby/animal, or just experiencing something heartwarming, will my my eyes tear and I start to sniffle. I just hope maybe one day, the sharp, loud feelings will simmer down. It hurts to be passionate.
Everyone feels these things.Now a bunch more people are going to throw this term around and self diagnose, like they do with depression and anxiety.., which is pretty insulting to people who actually suffer from bpd.
Fredward I feel non of these things. I don't understand those feelings at all.
Ahaha, Rune, honestly I rarely read comments! Unless I want to bang my head repeatedly against a keyboard, I refrain from doing things that will kill my braincells! LOL.
And Iza, I'm sure there are some people that might not feel any of these things, but the video gears into things that I consider to be ''Relatable'' to most individuals.
At least, 9/10 people I know would say they have felt at least one of these things
But it becomes clear really quickly that 90% of people do not have Bpd.
Fredward you are right.
Izabella Wilas Are you under the age of 18? That could be why. They won’t diagnose you with BPD under the age of 18 because it’s normal for teenagers to feel a bunch of the symptoms associated with BPD. If you feel that you are in need of assistance contact a psychiatrist.
Insulting to people who have bpd ? Ok so these people who ''self diagnose'' suffer too you know. Stop being so haughty with your personal triggers
everything in this video was so relatable to me. after I watched this,I can already tell you that I'm actually suffering from this BPD here. it's really hard for me sometimes. I find it really hard to trust some people,always apologizing like all the time and I just couldn't help myself but to keep everything that I actually feel on the inside rather than to talk to somebody about it.... this really hurts me so much🥺😔
I have BPD and I'm working really hard on my self awareness and how I affect others but what some people don't understand is how they affect people like me. We experience things so much more intensely and the common invalidation that most people can handle and brush off easily hurts us so bad and stay with us for much longer.
"I self-sabotage everything. Things could begoing well, butI find a way to destroy it."
I'm only three in and this one hurts the most.
For me i do those things because of my anxiety and depression but to the people who suffer from this my heart goes out to you
I was recently diagnosed with it and ALL of this descibes me. While it does explain my personality and my behavior over the last 20 years or so (im only 33), it is still hard for people to understand it. I told one of my best friends about it and she said to not "use it as a excuse" and that its "the same as bipolar" which it is not. I am often also told to "knock it off" or "calm down". Those dont help and just are very hurtful.
this is me but I am not evil, I help everybody even those who hurt me the most, I don't know how to say no. I am an empath. I always find guys with problems so they will not judge me for being who I am but every time they stab me in the back. I love deeply, lose myself in that love, live for that person even though they are so imperfect and they are not really deserved to be loved by me. I know all that but I just don't respect myself enough and I push those people away from me and then I apologise a lot and I don't like to hurt anyone. If they tell me that I hurt them I feel so so so bad, I can't live with that thought.
Bianca Neve check out co dependency, it sounds like what you're describing!
This sucks me too
same thing here
I agree that you should read up on co-dependency
@@patrickm.4469 I am fine now, thanks God. I am not dating anymore for over 5 years now and I am in peace. I go to the church and do things that I like to do. Thanks God for everything. I stopped searching for my "soulmate" or "the one" . God is that One and he is helping me in everything. Without Him I am nobody
Whaaat.. I'm actually diagnosed with BPD and I never thought that my habit of constantly apologizing and asking people if they're mad at me (much to their annoyance) might be a part of it. Thank you so much for this!
this video does not determine if you have BPD or not!! if you're self diagnosing yourself it takes weeks and even months to come up with the proper information!
you shouldn't self diagnose at all with bpd. it takes YEARS for doctors to accurately diagnose bpd the majority of the time. please don't downplay it.
I have all these symptoms so I may have BPD (not positive tho) but I struggle with the things in the video everyday, any suggestions on how to deal with them?
EasyGoingArtist go see a psychiatrist and see if you really do have BPD. I was diagnosed with it last year and they put you in a treatment group. BPD is not something you can fight alone.
EasyGoingArtist I have all of the symptoms too but I dont know how to ask my parents
love me or hate me that's the same with me. I also have bad anxiety but I don't know how to tell them
Whitney Skyes I don't know if my parents would let me see one
EasyGoingArtist You should see a therapist or a psychiatrist to let them diagnose you and treat you properly. This is a link from the National Institute of Mental Health for a self-assessment to see if you may have it (it's not a diagnosis it just means you're more likely to have it).
www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-Conditions/Borderline-Personality-Disorder
But...Canadians apologize a lot :s
tonytouch566 ah... Canada. the borderline country 😂
Hahahaha! I'm diagnosed with borderline personality disorder... and I am Canadian. Guess how much apologizing i do!? ;)
Marilyn de Montréal a lot? xD
Indeed!
tonytouch566 sooo. Now that we into it. wanna be friends?
I am so disappointed with my BPD ex, how we ended, and how she discarded me. Although, Seeing this and relating it to her and us makes me so sad for her because I can hear her saying these things to me over the past year:( No matter what, I can't help but love and care about her and her well-being.
I’m not being diagnosed with this but I feel this is what I’m going through at the moment
I lituraly apologise at least 10 days a day, if not, i am sick
What?
no thats fine, i had a weird keyboard back then anyways, and yea im good when it comes to english
i thought everyone had persecution complexes
*I was diagnosed with bpd when I was 3 or 4*
I always think people hate me and I just want to ball up and say sorry for being around you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, don't hate me, I'm sorry. Its kinda bad for family and friends because they won't ever be able to convince me that they're ok with being around me. There's a lot of other symptoms, but I'll keep this comment short sorta
Kana Fandom Unite you cannot diagnose a three year old with borderline personality
Sorry.... but no way that is true. This is a very serious issue and its not cool to lie about it for attention. Personality disorders are not some cool title to just apply to yourself make you look edgy. To actually suffers, it can be a living hell.
No real professional would diagnose a 3 or 4 year old with bpd. I highly doubt they would diagnose a 3 or 4 year old with any personality disorder or any mental health issues. Possibly they might could get diagnosed with autism or a learning disability of some kind?... I know that some people get diagnosed with that sort of thing pretty young sometimes, but idk the guidelines for autism/learning disabilities diagnosis, so I could be very there wrong about that (sorry for my lack of knowledge)..... But what I do know its that there is no way at all that you were diagnosed with bpd that young. Professionals don't even like to generally diagnose people under 18 with bpd incase its just teenage hormones just to be sure. And if you do get the diagnosis, good luck finding someone who actually wants to deal with you... People with bpd are often seen as oversensitive, selfish, hostile, and manipulative. We're the crazy exs (sometimes). We're self destructive, we fall way to hard for people and obsess, we fear rejection and abandonment to extreme unhealthy degrees, and a lot of us self harm. Many professionals don't even want to deal with bpders. Its a mess of a situation, hard to deal with, chaos and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.
In closing to this rant of mine, I'd like to quote something my grandad has told me before; "Its better to hang in there than to hang". If anyone reading needs help, you aren't alone. You have people who care about you. National suicide prevention number: 1-800-273-8255
Very true. I never even knew I had BPD until I started doing research on it and most of the symptoms clicked with me. I just don't self harm anymore and havnt done so in over 10 years from when I was a teenager. Thanks for the video i'm trying hard to work on it.. sometimes I feel like i'm an empath because I feel emotions so strongly not just my own but other people as well.
this sounds like my ocd anxiety. I Dont have BPD. but I apologize a lot ask if people are mad at me or if I did something wrong. avoid things that make me uncomfortable or hide from them but that's my anxiety and avoidance behavior. anxiety makes me feel like if I'm not perfect people will think I'm a sinner
Same. I've been having lots of anxiety and intrusive thoughts these past few months and it's been getting worse these past few weeks. I made a post on a Facebook group earlier and someone who actually got diagnosed with BPD told me that I'm showing multiple signs of it. I'm not gonna self diagnose myself but it is very frightening for me to think that I could have this.
I have this, anxiety chronic depression and a few others
You just described three quarters of the world population.
so true about me being quiet, i think things in my head a lot
im talkative but yeah. i also apologise a lot
im very sensitive and i have a big hart
sorry for my english im french
i have a lot of these.. do i have bpd or no??
Some of these symptoms actually indicate HSP: a Highly Sensitive Person. Borderline Personality Disorder is an actual disorder whereas being highly sensitive isn't.
Apologizing a lot doesn’t seem to me as a typical borderline thing. The same for asking if people are mad at me. Seems more of a self esteem problem. Some of these are BS I’m sorry....
I. Live strong I’ve been diagnosed with BPD for a very long time now & i have experienced almost all of these things. Mental illness affects everyone differently. Just because you haven’t experienced it, doesn’t mean it’s BS. there is no “typical” of any mental illness. that’s like saying every apple tastes the same, but there are in fact different types of apples that taste different from one another. just because a red delicious doesn’t taste exactly like a Granny Smith doesn’t mean they both aren’t apples ;).
Those are just some. For a diagnosis, there must be a combination of certain traits, these are SOME of the possibilities.
On their own, they’re just quirks
brontox095 absolutely
But they have to meet certain criteria to be diagnosed
The DSM outlines it, but if you don’t know how to use it, really all of us could be mis-diagnosed with MANY disorders, because we all gave quirks and traits seen in the criteria.
I think it’s tied with anxiety related issues that are engrained and more with quiet BPD rather than classic BPD possibly. I’ve been mates w others w BPD and they never apologise (not in a bad way, just different), I feel a lot of guilt too and anger is aimed at myself. I get it’s a different case for you but I wouldn’t assume it’s not applicable to anyone else eithed
well most if not all borderlines have low self esteem so....
These describe me.
SHAZBAT414 BPD is a trauma based illness. i have it cause i was abused as a child. some people have developed it by chance from being the scapegoat in a family. its a complex illness and they misdiagnose it alot as bipolar disorder cause they are both so similar just one is worse and that depends on the person
i'm sure there are some natural borns. like there are natural born MPD and trauma DID exist
I was just diagnosed by my doctor a few months ago I have been struggling with all of this for five years they having no idea what's wrong with me being on meds after meds. I just have just turned 18 I'm honestly surprised I have made it this long, I'm finally diagnosed!! Lets hope I get the help that I need, and start to move forward in life.
Ugh, guilty of apologizing to much. Feel like a sale my self short, and the self sabotage thing is a real struggle. Also, I do sleep a lot on my off days because I'm emotionally drained. I don't ask for help but I love helping others. I always feel like the person will hold me in dept even if I've reciprocated the favor.
I'm not about to self diagnose but I'm a little worried about the fact that I do all of these things all the time
I never had been able to pinpoint the difference between myself and "the average person" .. now I can see myself more clearly..
Imogen Nestorenko same struggle here. I ask my therapist: so... how a normal person reacts?. then she follows a 30 minute talk that won't answer my question. so yeah I wonder how it would feel not to feel as much
Yeah noo.. These things don't mean you have a personality disorder. Most people will experience these to some degree lol
Audacity Hall You wrote that so we'll 💓
I think the personality disorder bit is when you DO say something that may hurt and does hurt and then you shrug it off by saying they deserved it or it wasn't anything bad. By caring that you may hurt someone you are an average person and sensitive to emotions.
um no. that is NOT a symptom of any and all personality disorders. the problem with borderlines is that many of us have what's known as "borderline empathy", and what it means is that we actually have more of a capacity for emotional empathy than most people without bpd. stop assuming that a personality disorder automatically means you're a person who doesn't care about others.
We think my friend's ex had this. He was a nice guy but when they became close and she got to learn more about him/ see his darker side...He was full of manipulation. He was constantly testing her and questioning her . Seemed like he was dealing with severely low self-esteem but it got to the point where his behaviour was sabotaging their relationship as well as full filling his fear that if anyone found out that somehow it would ruin his relationship with his friends and family.He accused her of cheating but later we found out he was sexting out of town girls. He was always tired and sleeping. Demanded full sympathy for his troubles ("I was abandoned as a child") but was quick to describe her as a lazy airhead that didn't have a good work ethic (her business is killing it. We all know he was just directing his frustrations with his own financial problems onto her.) Whenever times were tough he would spiral insanely and would pull stories and accusations out of nowhere to destroy whoever he was upset or even just slightly frustrated with (he's done it to me, his dad, his siblings,, his ex) . I just keep a polite distance at this point but he fits all of the symptoms...soo.. He's either just a huge asshole... or has BPD.. or even BHD.
Damn...looks like I've got a huge lot of Disorders then...
You don't have BPD.
Yes she does. Disorder is a subjective concept created by the governing body of mainstream society. Diagnose yourselves as whatever you want. Anarchy ftw lol
@@starx8775 literally not true
I'm sorry for apologizing alot:/
I have all of these and think I have something but my parents say that it's just being a teenager... Like, okay, I'm terrified of talking about anything sad/serious/angering for fear that I will snap and either have a full blown panic attack or get super angry and shut down into a defensive degrade-and-emotionally-abuse-everyone mode because I'm a teen. Right, I forgot all teens invalidly feel hated to the point of apologizing for everything and needing constant reassurance that I'm not hated or they stay up all night in fear. Oh, so it's normal to sleep from 8 pm to 6 am, then spend 14 hours a day pacing and blaring music because the second it turns off I feel so empty and shell like that I don't even se a reason to keep living? Okay. Wowie, everyone has to leave class twice a week to break down in tears in the school bathroom?
I can admit that some things (irritablity, depressed MOOD, stress, etc.) are teen things, but the above???
karah Yeah, but if something has such a negative effect on your life to such extent, then it's often a disorder. Since I posted this, I was taken to counselling because my panic attack became a once to three times a day thing and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. She said that I probably could have easily gotten help earlier, but due to my parents not thinking it serious and my anxiety getting in the way of asking I had to suffer for years longer than I should have.
Disorders are overrated. If you have issues, get treated. I honestly feel so alone in this competitive society.
I ask a lot of questions for things I know and I apologize a lot, I can be quiet, and I am tired all the time
Lol wow. The echochamber of self pity and martyrdom is real.
lol wow the echochamber of ignorance is real
@@kaelahrenee5838 Familiarize yourself with the word “echochamber” and then get back to me.
i have. you're still ignorant.
having this disorder is horrible it's very hard too want too live for me death is always on my mind being a failure too everyone is always in the mind. I believe all my mental health issues where from abuse at a very young age ,sexual and so on..I pray for the mentally ill it is a horrible way too live!!
Peggy Hill my was from bad things happen to me as a child as well .
Sadly I can relate to this a lot.
BPD isn’t fun, and to be honest, it has ruined a lot of friendships and relationships for me
I know that you guys think that "normal' people do this too but people who suffer from BPD do this excessively to the point were people who are around them all day can get annoyed and or frustrated
i feel like if everyone can relate to these "symptoms" to a degree. the think that should prompt you to go seek out help or a digagnosis is if you have these problems to the point that they are seriously negatively impact your life and hinder you from maintaining healthy relationships. if you find you cant co troll these things at all or you struggle to then go see a doctor
i like when media doesnt portray bpd as some kind of demon spawn :) this is good
Kate Jay Ugh i know. there was an episode of criminal minds where a murderer/ kidnapper had BPD.... i was like really......
I diagnose You with a rare case
Of beautiful pretty and Lovely
Likened unto a butterfly
I have never thought I could have BPD, but... This video is a summary of my life
Frankly, I was a bit disheartened to read some of the comments posted- because I DO have BPD and I thought this video nailed it! The behaviors described are frustratingly Consistent for me, and they are not so much subject to changes in my general mood; dependent on situations involving other people; or, really, any context outside my own mentality. (I especially appreciated the things I'd Never heard before, like about needlessly asking questions- something I always end up kicking myself over!) ☆ But yes, a 1:40min video is not meant to fill in for a decent psychiatrist when it comes to finding an accurate diagnosis!
"Apologizing a lot." Is this some kind of joke? haha
KRKRokitMan lol, I said the same thing, read my recent comment I am sure we can agree.
It’s no joke, that’s how it is. Until you’ve met or have someone close to you with it, you will never understand the depths which this goes. All of this just scratches the surface.
i have it and i have issues apologizing in the first place lol. its different for everyone
Not a joke, haha.
Hmmm. As a healthcare professional, I would totally have to disagree with this video's perception of BPD. Many of the BPD I have interacted with manipulate with deceitful lies in order to get something for their benefit. Often times they like to get people to turn on one another.
@@richard-brown what no
@@richard-brown just bc you're in college to be a psych major doesn't mean that you have the credentials. and it's not a "fact" that everyone with bpd intentionally is manipulative and deceitful. i feel the word deceitful implies intentional, and that's not true for a lot of them. they failed to mention another real fact and symptom of bpd which is heightened emotional empathy as well as that most of us are loyal to a fault.
i see you're buying into the stigma that this disorder makes people who have it all horrible people who intend to hurt others for fun or their own gain
I suffer anxiety, I have most of these. I have never been formally diagnosed for any personality disorder
My ex boyfriend has BPD, was the worst person i ever met, the worst relationship i ever had and worst time of my life. People with BPD make other people around them suffer so much. They can literally drive you crazy and into depression. If you are in any kind of relationship with somebody with BPD, listen to me: Stay Away!!
I am all of those things... I didn't realize I had a personality disorder! I gotta apologize to everyone... Wait no! That's one of the signs!
Why does this sound exactly like me?
because you're human and most humans do this, BPD is much deeper and way more screwed up than this
Forever Rose cuz all people do that's why
I experience all of these things on a daily basis and it kills me.... Though it does come from Generalized Anxiety Disorder. It is a shame so many people deal with a lot of these symptoms in many different illnesses.
I really needed to see this. It popped up in my suggestions and for some reason I had to click. Now that I'm looking at these notes, I can see my sister has done all of these things and I never understood why. This helped.
Spot on !
Well shit
The way true bpd manifest itself in behavior is unmistakable to those that are familiar with it and confusing to those who are not.
Its true this is truly so exhausting dealing with all these thoughts an emotions.
I have been learning to apologize if I hurt someone, and appreciate when someone helps me
Apologizing is not always the problem, but when and why. Always remember thank you feels better than I'm sorry, when someone has lent you their time, ear, shoulder and/or kindness. People like thank yous, and I love your welcomes 💙
Most normal people change the conversation when they are uncomfortable.
This describes me a lot, I don't know what to do. I disagree with self-diagnoses.
One note says "Apologizing a lot". That's probably applicable only to strangers and "Never apologizing" to loved ones.
so uh this is absolutely not true at all, please don't speak on something you clearly aren't educated about. many borderlines apologize more to loved ones, especially after they've had an episode and realize that they've said or done things they regret.
This sounds like *Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder* because of the holding in of the emotions instead of acting out on & manipulating others
I dont have bpd but i do have all these problems. Anxiety is what causes it and being abused as a child will do it.
I say sorry for things I didn't do. Like someone else dropping a glass or something breaks… idk why.
I don't think I have this I just always think everyone secretly hates me and I hate getting my friends angry because I feel like they will never like me
I don't think this video was made for people to self diagnose. I watched this because I was diagnosed by a doctor and it helps to hear about other people's experiences. I want to understand my disorder. I'm sure a lot of other people do too because its very socially crippling a lot of the time. its just a nice video for people who are confused.
I’m not diagnosed with BPD but all this is so relatable
I was diagnosed with bpd a couple times. However at the times of my diagnosis I hated my mother and she has bpd. So I wanted nothing to do with her, I didn't want to be like her in anyway. So I rejected the diagnosis I was giving by a few different psychologist. See my mom would take everything out on everyone close to her, myself included. I tend to take everything out on myself I don't take it out on other people. So in my mind when I was diagnosed I had the image of my mom in mind.
Well good news, my mom started recognizing what she was doing, and seriously started seeking help. As did I and now we have a better relationship, not perfect, but I've never been this close with her so I am thankful I have her now. I am still figuring things out and it's hard everyday but I'd like to think that it will be okay if I keep working at getting better.
This is completely relative. Every mental illness is relative. It depends on the severity of these symptoms. Most every person experiences these things just not to the extreme. Also, these are tell tale signs of many different mental illnesses, not just BPD.
I apologise too much, but I once had an online friend who also had BPD, who never apologised for anything
When I was 7, I was diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar disorder. I'm 21years old now, and after being on medication for 16 years I do have better control, but I still feel my illness every single day. I can't focus on one thing to save my life, I start projects I never do finish, I can't stay upset for more than 5 minutes before I'm laughing and grinning and hyper all over again (so no one takes me seriously), I can't sit still for more than a few seconds, I just can't level my emotions. I don't know how to not say something dumb, I can't keep friends for more than a week, I can't stop thinking about who does and doesn't think I'm cool, I still don't even know what type of person I am. I can't pinpoint my own personality. It's so frustrating because all those years I think the doctors diagnosed me incorrectly. ADHD, yeah I have that I'm pretty sure, but I'm pretty sure by now that it's been BPD all these years, not BD
I get so paranoid, about everything. my friends hating me, my gf wanting to break up, someone breaking in or trying to kill me, everything.
i say/do things that make my partner sad just to see if he still cares and i hate myself for doing it. seeing him cry because of me shows me, that he loves me.
I got diagnosed with BPD cluster A & C not that long ago and most of these are very accurate to me
The one I was married to had no guilt, never apologized, did not care about saying the wrong thing, the rest pretty much fits!
People!!! A personality disorder is a *pervasive pattern,* not something you may do once in a while. Every human does things that are symptoms in any personality disorder. The difference is it being an *enduring pattern* that makes it a disorder. Just because you have done these things once in a while doesn't mean you have BPD.
I’ve just been diagnosed with bpd and I want out. I hate my mind and brain and how it works to mess everything up. I have ruined so many things in my life. Please don’t say you have bpd unless you’re diagnosed this disorder is disgusting and it’s like living in a prison of your own mind
I relate to all of these. And I don’t always make my bpd an excuse.
Depression? Diagnosed
Soical anxiety? Diagnosed
BPD? Relatible so im scared to know... EVERYTHING you said here refres to me.
I have been diagnosed with BPD and I can relate to all of the points in the video, but BPD is alot more than that......add self harm or constant suicidal thoughts or suicide to the list, intense emotions of irritability, frustration, anxiety and anger - unbelievably uncontrollable anger. Constant fear of abandonment, unable to keep friendships and also paranoia. These are just some of the symptoms there is more. It is a debilitating illness that has no cure and can only be managed for the rest of you life....
I relate to all of these and I still haven't gotten checked out yet.
These statements almost all fit me. I am diagnosed as having BPD. Everyone can see many of these statements coming from them, but for those with BPD these statements are ever present in their lives. TOO is a good way of thinking of a borderline. Because of the emotions being felt in the extreme, we can be seen as acting out in the extreme. With work and time, the borderline is able to learn to react to their extreme emotions in more appropriate ways, but those emotions are always present.
I'm tired with dealing with life & my head, I'm out of control
I have most of these, but what disorder do I have. I also find it more interesting to have something wrong with me. I fear the fact of being normal, but feel insane because I'm not normal. I've lost and aggravated many friends for saying sorry after anything, especially after saying things like, "Literally" and "like" a lot. I have one friend and I feel like the second I say or do one thing she doesn't like I scare her off. But I love her. I have trouble understanding why people get upset with me so I try to fix myself, but that's the problem. I don't know how. About a month ago I was diagnosed with anxiety. I have it mostly about school. I struggle to know who I am as a person. When someone brings up something I dislike or feel uncomfortable I change the subject right away. Especially with people who don't notice what I'm doing. I have terrified feelings about the dark. My number one fear is being alone. I sometimes have mental outbursts were I blame myself for what ever is wrong. I feel like there is something wrong with me, and not just because of watching this video. what's wrong with me?
Today I got diagnosed with BPD, and this video made me realize why I'm such a mess