I hired a "lawyer" to review my viewers dating profiles

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  • Опубликовано: 29 мар 2023
  • DISCLAIMER: PARKZER IS NOT A LAWYER
    Streaming live on Twitch! / dougdoug
    Full stream recording: • Valentines Day with Pa...
    MAIN CHANNEL: / gloudas
    TWITTER: / dougdougfood
    Edited by Mckl! mikeremer.wixsite.com/mysite
    Main Channel Playlists:
    Latest Uploads: • Latest Uploads | DougDoug
    Explained with Food: • Explained with Food | ...
    Gaming Challenges: • DougDoug Gaming Challe...
    Popular Videos: • Popular Videos | DougDoug
    Music Credits (in order of appearance):
    Ring Fit Adventure - Fitness Gym
    Zelda Skyward Sword - Opening
    Zelda Wind Waker - Outset Island
    Yakuza Like a Dragon - Apathy 3
    SimCity 3000 - Concrete Jungle
    Skullgirls - Clear Breeze
    Mario Kart 8 - Dolphin Shoals
    Bayonetta - Magical Sound Shower Out Run
    Bowser's Fury - Lake Lapcat Theme
    Pokemon Sword Shield - Slumbering Weald Theme
    Spyro A Hero's Tail - Dragon Village (Beta Version)
    Bowser's Fury - Plessie Ride
    Sonic Colors - Aquarium Park (Act 3)
    Zelda Wind Waker - Dragon Roost Island
    Super Mario Galaxy - Honeybee Kingdom
    Mario Strikers Charged - Pause Menu
    Skullgirls - Pedestrians Crossing
    Super Mario Sunshine - Noki Bay
    Guilty Gear Strive - Countermove
    Dual Destinies - Suspicious People
    Super Mario Odyssey - Staff Roll
    Sly Cooper 2 - Episode Select
    Persona 5 - Butterfly Kiss
    Astral Chain - Awakening
    Kirby Triple Deluxe - Dededes Royal Payback
    Persona 5 - Escape
    Astral Chain - Suspense
    freesound.org/people/Sheyvan/...
    About DougDoug:
    Doug is a sentient bell pepper who was hired by the FBI to crack gaming challenges and also talk about things with food
    #DougDoug #DougDougDoug #Parkzer
  • ИгрыИгры

Комментарии • 2,3 тыс.

  • @Orillion123456
    @Orillion123456 Год назад +6217

    "My eyes are up here."
    "And your bare chest is down there."
    Parkzer is truly a gift to the world.

    • @heart_less1259
      @heart_less1259 Год назад +261

      Actually sounds like a joke in a sitcom

    • @mariotheundying
      @mariotheundying 11 месяцев назад +122

      "Umm, my eyes are up here?"
      "Yeah, and your bosom is down there."

  • @matti.8465
    @matti.8465 Год назад +9487

    I love how despite being close friends, Parkzer always talks to Doug as if he was speaking to a client. It's like Doug picked a random lawyer from the street.

    • @preistestdragon4634
      @preistestdragon4634 Год назад +600

      where else was he supposed to source a lawyer from?

    • @monkedude
      @monkedude 11 месяцев назад +238

      @@preistestdragon4634 Saul Goodman

    • @FlareBlitzBanana
      @FlareBlitzBanana 11 месяцев назад

      @@monkedude Saul already worked against him in the conquest for America. Doug still holds a grudge to this day.

    • @nb_oovanboi7750
      @nb_oovanboi7750 11 месяцев назад +106

      or maybe even a random police officer

    • @tundcwe123
      @tundcwe123 11 месяцев назад +108

      Wait, you are telling me that he did not pick a random lawyer from the street for that stream?

  • @theblackunicorn261
    @theblackunicorn261 11 месяцев назад +3831

    Parkzer perfectly balances the line between "Perfectly normal everyday person" and "Alien who landed on earth 24 minutes ago"

    • @CallMeRivanX
      @CallMeRivanX 6 месяцев назад +111

      He's just an alien that landed on Earth 5 years ago or smth like that

    • @TjokoCow
      @TjokoCow 4 месяца назад +26

      i think thats called autis-----

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 4 месяца назад +87

      @@TjokoCowAutism, you can say it, it’s not a slur

    • @TjokoCow
      @TjokoCow 4 месяца назад +8

      Imp not saying it bc its rude to assume neurodivergence jus cuz they are strange@@DeathnoteBB

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 4 месяца назад +84

      @@TjokoCow Okay then don’t say it… You pretty clearly where saying it though. Also it’s more rude to call someone “strange” for seeming ND

  • @josephburkhart6602
    @josephburkhart6602 Год назад +3684

    I love the fact that Parkzer takes everything so seriously.
    "Hi, Billy Mays here-"
    "Hello Billy Mays."

  • @cycled9073
    @cycled9073 Год назад +8017

    If Parkzer got married he could be his own wedding officiant, marriage counselor, and divorce attorney. What a legend.

    • @dauntingkitty
      @dauntingkitty Год назад +405

      He can also shoot his ex-spouse because he’s a cop with a gun

    • @ender8124
      @ender8124 Год назад +294

      ​@@dauntingkitty then run his own prosecution and defense

    • @dm98five
      @dm98five Год назад +198

      @@ender8124 and execution

    • @larrybird6860
      @larrybird6860 Год назад +170

      @@ender8124 and prison breakout

    • @ashb7
      @ashb7 Год назад +153

      @@larrybird6860 and international manhunt

  • @Bri-tt1pj
    @Bri-tt1pj Год назад +6738

    We all better hope that Parkzer never makes a dating profile, no one else will stand a chance

    • @spawikcmnsu7137
      @spawikcmnsu7137 Год назад +36

      really hope this gets top comment

    • @HiyaDerred
      @HiyaDerred Год назад +5

      true

    • @brycemcneill6637
      @brycemcneill6637 Год назад +2

      true

    • @ICantThinkOfAFunnyHandle
      @ICantThinkOfAFunnyHandle Год назад +58

      Those goldfish never stood a chance

    • @thethingcalledlisa
      @thethingcalledlisa Год назад +65

      I hope he never does anything because he's better than everyone else at most things, I'm scared he'll try to become the main character so that chat has to join Doug as a side character

  • @lyvectra8442
    @lyvectra8442 Год назад +1452

    "Isn't rizz strictly sexual?"
    "He's in a watermelon!"
    That clears it up, thank you.

  • @ONE-vt1fz
    @ONE-vt1fz 11 месяцев назад +4476

    I love how parkzer is always like “I’m not a lawyer” and then proceeds to perfectly explain complex legal concepts

    • @AlterationA
      @AlterationA 6 месяцев назад +143

      Law is a pretty swagtastic hobby if you're able to weed through the dry, crunchy surface.

    • @sakuucchan
      @sakuucchan 6 месяцев назад +68

      @@AlterationA Heh. Weed.

    • @21bucks
      @21bucks 6 месяцев назад +36

      @@sakuucchan Heh. Weed.

    • @Stampyboyz
      @Stampyboyz 6 месяцев назад +24

      @@21bucks​⁠​⁠ Heh. Weed.

    • @BigDuckieMan
      @BigDuckieMan 6 месяцев назад +23

      @@Stampyboyz Heh. Weed.

  • @FriendlyArin
    @FriendlyArin Год назад +10263

    Parkzer is such a strange human being, how can one man be so many things? A lawyer, cop, pornstar, manager, gun owner, Doug's gay lover, and a dating expert! Everytime he shows up I scream he is too powerful

  • @jeridon6081
    @jeridon6081 Год назад +3068

    It will never not be funny how Parkzer seems to perpetually exist in a undefined super-state between the most normal Straight-Man type dude who has no care for any sort of funny business whatsoever, and also the most incomprehensible alien being who appears to have lived on Mars for his entire adult life and has no concept of human society

  • @spiderdude2099
    @spiderdude2099 Год назад +2722

    "Just because he likes sushi does not mean I become gay or bisexual"
    Your loss Parkzer

    • @AlinaAniretake
      @AlinaAniretake 10 месяцев назад

      Coward :)

    • @TheGrumbliestPuppy
      @TheGrumbliestPuppy 7 месяцев назад +9

      Is Parkzer gay? I legit can't tell.

    • @spiderdude2099
      @spiderdude2099 7 месяцев назад +33

      @@TheGrumbliestPuppy honestly, if I had to put forth headcanon, id say he’s asexual

    • @platinumfactor
      @platinumfactor 6 месяцев назад +149

      ​@@spiderdude2099i personally wouldn't headcanon a real person's sexuality, but go off ig

    • @spiderdude2099
      @spiderdude2099 6 месяцев назад +28

      @@platinumfactor it’s not based on nothing. Parkzer has expressed being at least demisexual, as in he doesn’t feel attraction until he gets to know someone. So, who knows? He’s at the very least Demisexual, but I also kinda get asexual vibes from him. It doesn’t really matter what I think tho.

  • @williamwright9028
    @williamwright9028 Год назад +1443

    I love how parkzer is chronically annoyed at things that don't make sense

    • @bruhmodeactive3211
      @bruhmodeactive3211 9 месяцев назад +34

      I know this doesn't won't sound good nor nice but he has big bang sheldon vibes

    • @lordfelidae4505
      @lordfelidae4505 7 месяцев назад +43

      @@bruhmodeactive3211that is deeply insulting and you should immediately apologize.

    • @bruhmodeactive3211
      @bruhmodeactive3211 7 месяцев назад +21

      @@lordfelidae4505 I said what I said but I'm sorry bout that

    • @NerdTheDemon
      @NerdTheDemon 6 месяцев назад +10

      ​@@bruhmodeactive3211I hate how accurate this is.

    • @destinyvoltaire
      @destinyvoltaire 4 месяца назад +14

      ​@@bruhmodeactive3211That is so many words to avoid saying autistic.

  • @gremlinman9724
    @gremlinman9724 Год назад +1517

    i do so deeply love that parkzer is always the most sane person in the room but also simultaneously never knows anything

    • @yorkkato
      @yorkkato Год назад +174

      Granted, when Doug and Chat are the only other people in the room, the bar of sanity is low

    • @TurbopropPuppy
      @TurbopropPuppy Год назад +26

      he is just a Normal Guy he doesn't know anything about vocaloids or memes and that's beautiful

  • @testedhawk
    @testedhawk Год назад +3324

    Parkzer speaks so slowly and meticulously as if he'll be sued or cancelled every time he opens his mouth

    • @Y0G0FU
      @Y0G0FU Год назад +337

      Hes a lawyer in Training... thats what he learns haha

    • @discordlexia2429
      @discordlexia2429 Год назад

      I'm fairly certain that Parkzer is very autistic. That would explain the way he speaks. Autistic people tend to have more trouble communicating and so learn to talk very clearly young to be understood.

    • @olive4200
      @olive4200 Год назад +478

      parkzer does speak like he knows he's being watched 24/7 by a team of lawyers who're ready to sue him the moment he says something vaguely untrue

    • @ohgodohnothebees
      @ohgodohnothebees Год назад +52

      ​@@olive4200 He is.

    • @solomonchild3398
      @solomonchild3398 Год назад +19

      ​@@ohgodohnothebees he's got his eyes on that Character and Fitness test

  • @pyguy7
    @pyguy7 Год назад +438

    Parkzor is a phenomenon where him being a "Lawyer in training" somehow makes him truly more powerful than any actual full lawyer.

  • @marleonka5578
    @marleonka5578 7 месяцев назад +364

    I adore how Parkzer and Doug give off the most "married" but also "strangers" energy ever

  • @Yuti640
    @Yuti640 Год назад +4651

    It’s always so fun to see Doug’s insanity mix with Parkzer’s purely grounded existence

    • @JoeLikesBlue
      @JoeLikesBlue Год назад +231

      The Ultimate Straight Man xd

    • @jenske2881
      @jenske2881 Год назад

      Doug is like the gayest straight man ever and parkzer is like the straightest gay man ever he is like the most insane person out of the 2 of them because he just talks in a psychotic way

    • @Number.1Yanfei.Fan123
      @Number.1Yanfei.Fan123 Год назад +166

      Straight man vs funny man splatfest is real and they are cooperating

    • @billnye8760
      @billnye8760 Год назад +4

      @@JoeLikesBlue 25:22 truuuue

    • @nagitoaussiemandias
      @nagitoaussiemandias Год назад +22

      @@Number.1Yanfei.Fan123 Parkzer vs Dougdoug vs Chat splatfest when?

  • @bruh-vp1fp
    @bruh-vp1fp Год назад +3802

    I love how Parkzer is either way too into the joke or legitimately completely lost in the sauce with the inside jokes of both doug and chat.

    • @matteofaccin6636
      @matteofaccin6636 10 месяцев назад +263

      Parkzer half the time: "That is incorrect"
      Parkzer the other half of the time: "Even your dog!"

    • @pranksinatra2755
      @pranksinatra2755 9 месяцев назад +62

      i think he might be on the spectrum a bit.

    • @TheUnderscore_
      @TheUnderscore_ 9 месяцев назад +38

      @@pranksinatra2755Vibes I got as well. Definitely very high-functioning though.

    • @CanItTookann
      @CanItTookann 8 месяцев назад +9

      @@TheUnderscore_what? 😭

    • @smwatertasteslikewater
      @smwatertasteslikewater 8 месяцев назад +24

      @@TheUnderscore_stop using the terms high and low functioning

  • @hastyscorpion
    @hastyscorpion 10 месяцев назад +685

    The straight man funny man duo once again proves why it has been working 100s of years, You guys are truly a modern day Abbot and Costello

    • @bruhmodeactive3211
      @bruhmodeactive3211 9 месяцев назад +104

      Doug: who is on first
      Parkzer: who is on first??
      Doug: correct
      Parkzer: you didn't answer the question

    • @lordfelidae4505
      @lordfelidae4505 7 месяцев назад +17

      @@bruhmodeactive3211very in character.

  • @BierBart12
    @BierBart12 10 месяцев назад +529

    Parkzer, the Taekwondo master: "There is no belt system for guns"
    His sheer martial power has made him forget about belt-fed guns

  • @seamusburke3350
    @seamusburke3350 Год назад +444

    "It's not that I'm afraid of the water, it's that I tend to sink" is an incredible line

    • @mandowarrior123
      @mandowarrior123 Год назад +42

      I think it isn't the a line or a hook, but a sinker.

  • @masterplusmargarita
    @masterplusmargarita Год назад +1524

    The genuine offense Parkzer seems to feel when he thinks Doug is saying he ate a screwdriver when he was 6 years old is what gives me the energy to keep living.

    • @sillyalert14
      @sillyalert14 Год назад +32

      hes the best omg

    • @snipingsloth1053
      @snipingsloth1053 Год назад +8

      His innocence must be preserved 😂

    • @SpaceMissile
      @SpaceMissile 11 месяцев назад +11

      makes me laugh so hard. he's completely taken aback. you'd think the name was like "fecalsnot" or something from that reaction

    • @truecrisp
      @truecrisp 11 месяцев назад +5

      6:32

    • @donofdeaths
      @donofdeaths 11 месяцев назад +2

      @@truecrisp MVP

  • @ulyssesdamon3408
    @ulyssesdamon3408 Год назад +305

    As a new person to Parkzer (mainly watched the chat runs), the energy these to give off to each other is true friendship. Its like Doug is there to torment Parkzer and Parkzer has just accepted his fate.

  • @corbinpearce7686
    @corbinpearce7686 10 месяцев назад +359

    Parkzer blesses us with supreme sanity. “How am I supposed to make a decision with just this information”
    Amen brother, dating apps are a dumpster fire.

    • @e.m.2168
      @e.m.2168 7 месяцев назад +35

      Tbf, the decision isn’t “would I date this person”, it’s “do I want to talk to this person” and then based on that decide on dating or not

    • @jotarogoosjo.1582
      @jotarogoosjo.1582 7 месяцев назад +46

      I'm gonna be honest with you here, sometimes what's put in there isn't enough for 'Would I talk to this person?' either.

    • @anastasiao4036
      @anastasiao4036 29 дней назад

      @@jotarogoosjo.1582 At most, the information put in the dating apps are for "Should I avoid this person if I see them on the street?"

  • @kingofspades110
    @kingofspades110 Год назад +1708

    Parkzer is such an enigma of a human being, I love him dearly

    • @coins_png
      @coins_png Год назад +70

      he's such a fine specimen

    • @discordlexia2429
      @discordlexia2429 Год назад

      I'd bet money that Parkzer is severely autistic. I both am and have known very autistic people and his body language is familiar to me. That little way he sort of bobs his head a bit, I dunno how to describe it, but it's something I've seen in every strongly autistic person I've met. I really respect Doug's chat for all appreciating him and including him rather than picking on him.

    • @hopsys
      @hopsys Год назад +47

      He's anything but an enigma, though, isn't he? He's completely blunt and open about who he is and what his values are.

    • @traceable7875
      @traceable7875 Год назад +86

      @@hopsys the point isn’t that it’s hard to figure out what he is, it’s just that his interests and personality seems very strange compared to the conventional average.

    • @fragilistico
      @fragilistico Год назад +37

      @@hopsys I think they refer to the enigma that is Parkzer's mind, not that he *is* enigmatic

  • @Tajealos
    @Tajealos Год назад +1031

    Doug and Parkzer are like the two halves of the brain but as whole people, and watching them interact is fantastic

    • @bruhmodeactive3211
      @bruhmodeactive3211 9 месяцев назад +38

      The left and right brain

    • @naomiagan4710
      @naomiagan4710 4 месяца назад +8

      Doug is the intrusive thoughts part of the brain and Parkzer is the logic that keeps you from giving in to those thoughts

    • @odwrksboxedtrash3730
      @odwrksboxedtrash3730 3 месяца назад

      The problem with the personification of intrusive thoughts is that without the suppressive conscience, that thing is going to continue to act on every single "intrusive" thought it has.

  • @eggnognorth5383
    @eggnognorth5383 9 месяцев назад +287

    I love how confused parkzer was at a drink being named "Screwdriver", as someone who knows the story(Coal miners had orange juice rations while alchohal was prohibited and so they mixed vodka into thier orange juice and mixed it with screwdrivers) it is hilarious how upset he is.

    • @JorgetePanete
      @JorgetePanete 4 месяца назад +4

      alchohal

    • @JorgetePanete
      @JorgetePanete 4 месяца назад +9

      hmm yes if i mix coffee with a spoon i'm drinking a spoon

    • @lukeboy8081
      @lukeboy8081 2 месяца назад +8

      Why are you like this?​@@JorgetePanete

    • @fuy1648
      @fuy1648 2 месяца назад

      ​@@lukeboy8081Wdym?

  • @undeniablySomeGuy
    @undeniablySomeGuy Год назад +387

    10:19 This is something that lots of people need to hear in dating advice. Preferences and interests, while a decent starting point, are usually an ultimately unimportant aspect of your chemistry with another person. Hell, take Dougdoug and Parkzer. They have so little in common in terms of surface traits that people usually put on a dating profile, but there are things keeping them together that go deeper than that.
    When you have some things in common with someone, but have a decent amount that is different, there will be a lot to talk about. Common ground is safety, but differences are interesting and discussion worthy.

    • @inaneinacheve
      @inaneinacheve 11 месяцев назад +66

      You're absolutely right. You can have people that play games in the same room, and they can play the same game, but still have little to talk about because of their personalities

    • @jackuval9362
      @jackuval9362 22 дня назад

      why is this so far down?? Real shit man

  • @nicknack512
    @nicknack512 Год назад +1704

    Parkzer is my favorite lawyer, especially when he’s trying to breed with a goldfish

    • @HEX_17
      @HEX_17 Год назад +30

      That’s my favorite thing he does

    • @ZachsOnQuack
      @ZachsOnQuack Год назад +3

      You mean your favorite koala

    • @TheSavage303
      @TheSavage303 Год назад +1

      ​@@ZachsOnQuack koala lawyer

  • @TheDool
    @TheDool Год назад +4515

    Parkzer is the most conventionally boring but unique person ive ever seen. Bless this man, he is a gem.

    • @QuantumRipple
      @QuantumRipple Год назад +237

      He's got that James May charisma

    • @goodsirbear-7579
      @goodsirbear-7579 11 месяцев назад +135

      You misspelled gun

    • @rishavganguly92
      @rishavganguly92 11 месяцев назад +36

      Like James May and Jordan Schlansky.

    • @joshclark756
      @joshclark756 11 месяцев назад +43

      @@goodsirbear-7579 he is not a gun

    • @helloworld2409
      @helloworld2409 11 месяцев назад +108

      ​@@joshclark756source?

  • @Brainlers
    @Brainlers 11 месяцев назад +202

    I’m so glad parkzer finally decided to collab with someone, even if it’s with this random guy no one’s ever met I’m still glad it happened, 10/10 video

    • @crumpet-enjoyer
      @crumpet-enjoyer 10 месяцев назад

      .

    • @Brainlers
      @Brainlers 10 месяцев назад +8

      @@crumpet-enjoyer excuse me I wasn’t talking about parkzer I was talking about the other dude,

    • @Brainlers
      @Brainlers 10 месяцев назад +7

      @@crumpet-enjoyer so how about you read the text before you try to correct me

    • @Brainlers
      @Brainlers 10 месяцев назад +8

      he deleted his comment lmao

    • @dominusanuli3595
      @dominusanuli3595 8 месяцев назад +3

      @@Brainlerswho

  • @poppajournee8323
    @poppajournee8323 11 месяцев назад +168

    These two characters are equally starnge and enigmatic. Doug and Parkzer are a friendship made in heaven

    • @No.Yes..
      @No.Yes.. 7 месяцев назад +2

      Poppajournee8323, you were two Steps late. Your Jojo Reference was your only weakness.

  • @StoneColdStare
    @StoneColdStare Год назад +862

    Parkzer: "Will you please listen? I'm not a lawyer!"
    Doug & Chat: "HE IS A LAWYER!"

    • @dogk2121
      @dogk2121 Год назад +7

      Yeah that’s what happened

    • @alainbcdefghijk
      @alainbcdefghijk Год назад +6

      That's exactly what a lawyer would say!

  • @DapperCrap
    @DapperCrap Год назад +1487

    Parkzer: Isn’t “rizz” strictly sexual?
    Doug: *It’s in a watermelon.*

  • @E-MAN979
    @E-MAN979 11 месяцев назад +108

    I love how Parkzer is uncomfortable with with certain very normal things, but has a completely different experience with stuff that’s not normal.

  • @grandbean9031
    @grandbean9031 Год назад +60

    I am convinced Parkzer is an 15th century middle aged Japanese man that's been isekaid into today's world and had a yokai tell him if he ever admits to it, he'd end the world so he has to always angrily and disappointedly try to answer everything in the most straight forward way to not get people suspicious.

  • @ballondeplage
    @ballondeplage Год назад +778

    Parkzer must be protected at all costs, he's a treasure we cannot lose in the divorce 😭

    • @woopyboi
      @woopyboi Год назад +2

      69 likes :)

    • @thefinthechat923
      @thefinthechat923 Год назад +14

      And he must never discover what a muscle mommy is

  • @buggibii
    @buggibii Год назад +3064

    The way Parkzer says _"Douglas"_ with his entire chest exudes a -sexual- lawyer energy.

  • @trexnotsmart4747
    @trexnotsmart4747 Год назад +81

    Its fucking hilarious how parkzer was more interested in the squirrel video than the dating profiles

  • @Sonatengraf
    @Sonatengraf Год назад +93

    This gets better every few minutes. Parkzer is so relatable. I love how he reacts so purely and honestly to _dating apps._ Then, we find out that he is a not-formally-educated legal consultant who works in the porn industry? But later, the money quote: “What is an embedded software engineer?” - “Like, he's very sleepy”. Amazing. Then, a shallow dive into the GDPR. What?! Luckily, Josh seems to reside in the USA, and the GDPR only applies within the EEA. You're safe, Josh! Later, we get some inside into US-American taxes, or so we are led to believe, and it turns out DouglasDouglas edited Parkzer's advice into a meme. I absolutely adore that Parkzer tracks his activities in his calendar. There's some information on the right time to re-finance loans. Thanks, Parkzer! I hope you take over this rotten channel soon, after DouglasDouglas gets convicted for locking D-colon in the basement.

  • @krazy_w4fflez611
    @krazy_w4fflez611 Год назад +259

    "Maybe I was screw-driven as a 6 year old" god I love everything that Parkzer says

  • @alphanoodle1877
    @alphanoodle1877 Год назад +1110

    Parkzer feels like a AI generated human based solely off people from the 80s

    • @lemontree9518
      @lemontree9518 Год назад +82

      this is what peak peformance looks like

    • @Orillion123456
      @Orillion123456 Год назад +227

      No way an AI could generate something as sophisticated as parkzer. He was definitely carefully handcrafted by a team of scientists.

    • @nevaeh9125
      @nevaeh9125 Год назад +52

      ​@@Orillion123456 grown in a lab

    • @mrself5824
      @mrself5824 Год назад +9

      Parkzer is the default human you see when you would see if created a human character.

    • @Orillion123456
      @Orillion123456 Год назад +6

      @@mrself5824 That is a very strange statement to make about an extremely exceptional person like parkzer.

  • @pip8175
    @pip8175 Год назад +495

    i feel like parkzer is so aggressively neurodivergent its like I'm talking through him he is saying exactly what i would say

    • @a_literal_crow
      @a_literal_crow 9 месяцев назад +107

      I was diagnosed with Autism a few years ago, and I see so much of myself in Parkzer.

    • @greenbeepm
      @greenbeepm 9 месяцев назад +73

      @@a_literal_crow i thought you said digested with autism, thank you for the laugh

    • @a_literal_crow
      @a_literal_crow 9 месяцев назад

      @@greenbeepm true, I consumed the autism to become the autism

    • @lordfelidae4505
      @lordfelidae4505 7 месяцев назад

      @@greenbeepmwell when you’re diagnosed later in life, I’d imagine you need to digest that shift in self image for a bit.

    • @bluishwolf
      @bluishwolf 6 месяцев назад

      @@greenbeepm Would that be eating yourself?

  • @sifsroyalguard7322
    @sifsroyalguard7322 10 месяцев назад +74

    I want to have a hour long conversation with Parkzer about taxes, economics, and culinary arts now.

  • @JEnduro
    @JEnduro Год назад +310

    my favorite thing with Parkzer is I am never sure if he gets the joke or is just an IRL comedic straightman

    • @order60000000000
      @order60000000000 Год назад +37

      Both, both is good.

    • @kestrelynn
      @kestrelynn Год назад +28

      Yep, both, he 100% gets the joke and is also an irl comedic, and possibly literal, straight man

  • @Alice-un3kq
    @Alice-un3kq Год назад +413

    I legitimately cannot tell if Parkzer is a master troll or not. He knows so many things and yet he doesn't. It really makes you think

    • @placeholderdoe
      @placeholderdoe Год назад +4

      He is *THE* master troll

    • @stevenbobbybills
      @stevenbobbybills Год назад +12

      He wiped out his entire memory bank clear of anything that isn't laws.

    • @Levi_is_Smol
      @Levi_is_Smol Год назад

      Honestly, he feels a bit autistic to me. Has his very special interests while being absolutely unknowing about almost anything else. Takes things very literally and doesn't understand a lot of jokes.

    • @jackuval9362
      @jackuval9362 22 дня назад

      definitely not trolling, and if you need proof it's in the calendaring of events. He reminds me a lot of one person I know in particular, and he is 100% legit

  • @JP12345
    @JP12345 11 месяцев назад +71

    I love how Parkser is just like a normal guy, it really highlights Doug's insanity and adds so much contrast

    • @jd1800
      @jd1800 11 месяцев назад +7

      Doug is much more normal aside from the olive oil.

    • @cranberrys6921
      @cranberrys6921 4 месяца назад +3

      I’d like to say in todays day and age, Doug is the more normal of the two.

  • @Nik_M11
    @Nik_M11 Год назад +85

    I didn't laugh this hard in a while.. love the dynamic these two have together. Parkzer is genuinely so wholesome, Doug delivering so many funny comments with a straight face is hilarious as well

  • @stefanlanger8271
    @stefanlanger8271 Год назад +291

    Best line is “Douglas Douglas”
    The fact that Doug and Parkzer have such conflicting personalities on stream is an amazing dynamic.

    • @blakksheep736
      @blakksheep736 Год назад +3

      He greets him like that all the time btw.

  • @Daibana
    @Daibana Год назад +456

    Parkzer is the ultimate straight man of any comedy duo

    • @p_ttown1979
      @p_ttown1979 Год назад +14

      this. this right here. nailed it right on the head

  • @cubeman909
    @cubeman909 Год назад +95

    its always nice when doug makes a cameo on parkzer's streams

  • @Neon-ws8er
    @Neon-ws8er Год назад +186

    i actually refuse to believe that there is a man as normal and healthy as parkzer in the world

    • @rugbug531
      @rugbug531 2 месяца назад

      I don’t know if I would call that man normal and healthy. I mean I guess you COULD…

    • @Drippy_Jesus
      @Drippy_Jesus 14 дней назад

      @@rugbug531 He is the PINNACLE of normal and healthy.

  • @stevenbigfist1346
    @stevenbigfist1346 Год назад +264

    Parkzer is such an enigma, one second he is a cop then a gun owning attorney, And now a pornstar consultant who is deathly afraid of water. We should all aspire to be this man.

    • @malknight4197
      @malknight4197 Год назад +2

      he's not afraid of water, he just... sinks

  • @tarvitz
    @tarvitz Год назад +850

    Finally, a cure for our collective divorce

  • @zgredczwartyniesamowity363
    @zgredczwartyniesamowity363 10 месяцев назад +29

    Parkzer is like an alien that learned human customes from legal documents and try to understand in real life.

  • @undeniablySomeGuy
    @undeniablySomeGuy Год назад +54

    9:22 I feel like if I ever need to explain to someone why we love Parkzer, this is the best clip I could show. He is, at every moment, incredibly thorough and precise while being hilariously out of his depth at other random things.

  • @bemybff205
    @bemybff205 Год назад +536

    For Parkzer, Valentine's isn't just a day it's a state of being. The man oozes rizz

  • @SuperSilver7591
    @SuperSilver7591 Год назад +35

    The duality of Doug purposely changing the narrative and Parkzer having to correct him constantly for *legal purposes* is so hilarious

  • @adp3376
    @adp3376 Год назад +48

    I used to think Parkzer was the most sane person on RUclips but this stream clearly proved me wrong

  • @Aimlesswaves.
    @Aimlesswaves. Год назад +1079

    Parkzer is the strongest "straight man" I've ever seen.
    (In a comedy aspect, not sexual preference aspect.)

    • @SoMSoMreal
      @SoMSoMreal Год назад +71

      I mean that as well

    • @nikkoa.3639
      @nikkoa.3639 Год назад +75

      He is probably the strongest straight man I've seen in a sexual preference aspect too

    • @goodnight4u
      @goodnight4u Год назад +62

      Agreed. Definitely a top contender for strongest straight man in a geometric aspect.

    • @_.Dylan._
      @_.Dylan._ Год назад +24

      He is one of the strongest straight men in a fire aspect

    • @bidoof367
      @bidoof367 Год назад +22

      he's the strongest straight man in an aspect ratio for sure

  • @addama
    @addama Год назад +342

    The Doug-Parkzer Dynamic: Doug implies something incorrect for comedic effect; Parkzer reminds Doug that the statement was, in fact, incorrect, but only half of the time for comedic effect. This is why they work so well together, like puzzle pieces cut from the same mold.

  • @Frixworks
    @Frixworks Год назад +33

    I love the dynamic between Parkzer and Doug, the fact that Parkzer takes everything super seriously while Doug is just aloof. Sometimes I wonder how they became friends or if Parkzer is just playing an act.

  • @billyharris2794
    @billyharris2794 10 месяцев назад +10

    Linguistics lesson: -"Rizz" is short for Charisma. Y'know, cha-rizz-ma.
    -"Hits" is short for "Hits the spot". So "hits different" means it hits the spot better than other foods and "doesn't hit the same" means it doesn't hit the spot as much as it used to. Can also be used the same way in a non-food context.
    -"Rips ass" means farts

  • @Shpeedle
    @Shpeedle Год назад +262

    Parkzer immediately pointing out dating app flaws is hilarious even though he is the master of dating

  • @Tuntor689
    @Tuntor689 Год назад +372

    Fascinating how Parkzer was given media he enjoys and immediately started gaining a short attention span.

    • @wikbon
      @wikbon Год назад +15

      nice catch, nice thought

    • @anotherhenry7895
      @anotherhenry7895 Год назад +8

      you mean squirrels and chipmunks ?

  • @destroyercreator9678
    @destroyercreator9678 9 месяцев назад +18

    "No, i had orange juice and alcohol, not a screw... SCREWDRIVER?!"
    Parkzer not knowing things is pure comedy

  • @QJDWG
    @QJDWG Год назад +54

    The SCREWDRIVER moment set the expectation for the rest of the stream. Protect Parkzer at all costs!

  • @c.m.9369
    @c.m.9369 Год назад +347

    Parkzer and Doug are like two characters from completely different movie genres interacting.
    It‘s like Parkzer is from a dry, realistic human drama…
    And Doug is from a surreal cartoon!

    • @placeholderdoe
      @placeholderdoe Год назад +4

      Parkzer is the main character in a game while Doug is a random enemy

    • @Jr837_
      @Jr837_ Год назад +7

      Parkzer is from Sherlock Holmes, while Doug is from Spongebob

  • @alaskanchurro4983
    @alaskanchurro4983 Год назад +306

    They need Parkzer's advice judging by the amount of divorces chat has.

  • @speedscampi5217
    @speedscampi5217 Год назад +25

    Parkzers realizm is the perfect balance to Doug's energy and comedy, I love seeing their interactions

  • @edgarb2002
    @edgarb2002 3 месяца назад +6

    “I was screwdriven as a 6 year old” is the craziest thing I’ve ever heard.

  • @WildCardIsAces
    @WildCardIsAces Год назад +419

    Parkzer: "If you are a straight man, do not attempt to date me."
    So you're saying a gay man has a chance?

    • @ggnkrsfkoqxbk5078
      @ggnkrsfkoqxbk5078 11 месяцев назад

      No, the problem wasn’t the straight part, it was the man part. You’ll need to be a cat idiot.

    • @actuallyIDontExist
      @actuallyIDontExist 11 месяцев назад

      Idk but we can find out

  • @fernbear3950
    @fernbear3950 Год назад +332

    My favorite bit so far is 25:32 where Parkzer says "Just because I like sushi does not mean I become gay or bisexual"
    Unfortunately that's the thing that got me but I hope he's able to hold out for the long run (if he wants, lol)

    • @fernbear3950
      @fernbear3950 Год назад +44

      Also, I really liked the part where he said "it's Parking time" and then parked all over the place

    • @ashb7
      @ashb7 Год назад +6

      @@fernbear3950 *Parkzin' time, FTFY

    • @fernbear3950
      @fernbear3950 Год назад +5

      @@ashb7 *smacks noodles snacks* oh no, i knew what i was doing bxi.... ;D

  • @batcat4136
    @batcat4136 Год назад +5

    Doug is like a journalist in that he can take the slightest off-hand comment and he’ll run a mile. Like Parkzers “I don’t like water” to “You’re afraid of the water” and it’s something special to behold

  • @stephentwest
    @stephentwest Год назад +1

    This video was not only hilarious but also incredibly informative. It's amazing how much of a difference a few tweaks to a dating profile can make. I appreciate how the lawyer gave honest and constructive feedback, pointing out both the good and the bad aspects of the profiles. It was also interesting to see how the profiles differed based on gender and age. As someone who's struggled with creating a good dating profile, I found this video to be incredibly helpful. It's clear that a lot of effort and thought went into creating this video, and I thoroughly enjoyed watching it. Thanks for sharing your insights!

  • @shinysilverstardust
    @shinysilverstardust Год назад +190

    We need a f*cking sitcom with these two.

    • @liamw6976
      @liamw6976 Год назад +26

      I would watch the HELL out of that sitcom

    • @idontneedaname318
      @idontneedaname318 Год назад +2

      It would be genuinely incredible

  • @Malache
    @Malache Год назад +276

    50 MINUTES of Pure love between Parkzer and Doug!?!?! Hope Twitch chat Doesn't cause them to Divorce

  • @crazycacti
    @crazycacti Год назад +7

    omg i love how doug looks at parkzer with such adoration its amazing

  • @Qaos
    @Qaos Год назад +8

    I love Parkzer's classic catch-phrase, "I'm not a lawyer". These videos should really have a laugh track every time he says his classic catch-phrase.

  • @KittyMariChan
    @KittyMariChan Год назад +132

    Parkzer is so serious it loops around to being hilarious, he and Doug have a great friendship

  • @imperialguardsman5726
    @imperialguardsman5726 Год назад +118

    i fucking love how parkzer backtracked twice just to make rizz sound as nerdy as anyone could ever make it

  • @Kool-AidDealer
    @Kool-AidDealer Год назад +1

    this is such a polarizing and entertaining duo i dont know how it works but it does very well

  • @hedgeearthridge6807
    @hedgeearthridge6807 Месяц назад +2

    Parkzer is the greatest example ever of "If you're going to be weird, do it confidently". He's absolutely magnetic despite being like Data from Star Trek 😂

  • @grantarmstrong2968
    @grantarmstrong2968 Год назад +113

    I love how literal parkzer is in contrast to how sarcastic and absurd Doug can be, it’s a brilliant duo

  • @MrMonkeyLogic
    @MrMonkeyLogic Год назад +116

    Parkzer is just the worlds most perfect straight man.
    (For Parkzer reading this. I know it's presumptuous of me but straight man is a comedy term for someone who is serious so the funnyman has someone who contrasts them.)

  • @cymeyers1255
    @cymeyers1255 Год назад +10

    parkzer and doug are unironically one of the greatest comedic duos around right now.

  • @greffen
    @greffen Год назад

    this is 100% my favorite video of yours lmao. the pairing of you too is actually amazing lol

  • @robotortoise
    @robotortoise Год назад +830

    I'm autistic, and the relationship Parker has with Doug is the exact relationship I have with my neurotypical friends. It's absolutely great, lol.

    • @GolenCheeseIt
      @GolenCheeseIt Год назад

      Parkzer* How could you possibly miss-spell his name like that?
      What're you, autistic? Oh wait...

    • @discordlexia2429
      @discordlexia2429 Год назад +252

      I love the way chat really loves and respects Parkzer while teasing him just enough to get a reaction. It's great to see. Mobs are not often kind to severely autistic people.

    • @robotortoise
      @robotortoise Год назад +1

      @@discordlexia2429 Yeah! I'm not sure if he's autistic or not (I don't want to diagnose strangers!) but damn, I legitimately adore how he and the chat are so respectful with each other.
      You can tell he's getting as much of a kick out of this as Doug is.

    • @JettSvart
      @JettSvart Год назад +258

      @@discordlexia2429 I think that how much adoration Doug has for Parkzer has rubbed off on his chat. Also, Parkzer will unexpectedly deliver the harshest burns to Doug, and you know we love to see our guy get dunked on.

    • @bradenaurelion3033
      @bradenaurelion3033 Год назад

      Parkzer is autistic? I'm confused sounded normal to me

  • @Oakendal
    @Oakendal Год назад +205

    I like how Parkzer just questions society the whole while Doug tries to explain how it’s supposed to work even though it shouldn’t

  • @AnubisFactsGames
    @AnubisFactsGames Год назад +7

    34:02 “There is no belt system for guns.”
    Oh yeah? What about belt-fed machine guns, Parkzer?

  • @Ignoramus3000
    @Ignoramus3000 Год назад +7

    These two play off of each other so well. Parkzer as the lawyer + cop + straight man and Doug as the loose cannon wild card. The classic comedy duo.

  • @toshi9742
    @toshi9742 Год назад +181

    Do you think Parkzer’s dirty talk during sex is just whispering about loop holes in different laws?

    • @GolenCheeseIt
      @GolenCheeseIt Год назад +29

      Hopefully the laws aren't related....

  • @SpaceMissile
    @SpaceMissile 11 месяцев назад +10

    6:23 - I remember seeing this part live; I still find it hilarious how completely offended he was by the name "screwdriver" for a drink 😂

  • @sawrdanimationstudios4430
    @sawrdanimationstudios4430 10 месяцев назад +6

    I want Doug to release the full 1 and a half minute footage of Parkzer talking about taxes

  • @euanokeeffe9652
    @euanokeeffe9652 Год назад +144

    I fucking adore how Parkzer is slowly growing more comfortable on the channels, and is slowly starting to joke more. It’s nice to see.

  • @maxxbmd
    @maxxbmd Год назад +246

    First a bunny suit, and then a unicorn costume. Is there something DougDougDoug wants to tell us?

  • @CheeseAndCrackers_
    @CheeseAndCrackers_ Год назад +4

    Parkzer and Doug are complete polar opposites but still great friends, all their videos together are hilarious

  • @scrumblycat
    @scrumblycat 8 месяцев назад +2

    Doug and Parkzer are both very strange but in completely opposite ways

  • @daskanguru3515
    @daskanguru3515 Год назад +168

    Since we recently found out about Doug CLEARLY being a gay virgin, I'm glad he hired Parkzer to create a suitable dating profile

  • @mynumlulz12
    @mynumlulz12 Год назад +99

    Dougs face at 6:48 after parkzer said "Well I guess I was screwdriven" is hilarious to me lmao.