Listened to the audiobook, then read the book. Doctor Glover changed my life. Guy seriously read his book or listen to the audiobook, especially in these times with media.
I just purchased the book, off eBay. Normally, you can get many many books dirt cheap off eBay - but very often blockbuster self-help books cost more - but this was worth it. Waiting for it to arrive...
Trust me mate, the book will speak in volumes to you. When listening to it was in the beginning very hard because he touched on so many truths about myself without even meeting me. I hope you don’t have to wait to long for the book mate. 🤘
I have vision and passion, yet I am still nice guy. It is true that I fear perusing my vision and passion because of my fear of not being good enough. And that's where I turn to woman and their validation. So it's not end all be all to just have vision and passion. But it's definetly first step.
wow you got him as a guest with 500 subs! I don't mean it to diminish your subscriber number because relative to where I heard him speak they usually have millions of subs. You are very skilled at inviting guests and standing out, I'd like to have this confidence within myself and not feel imposter syndrome when making my own content.
Thanks for the support. I hear you. Actually, the next video is about this exact topic - overcoming limiting beliefs. Dr. G was definitely very generous to take the time to speak with an unknown. Yet, at the same time, if we conduct ourselves like we're not worth talking to, then people are gonna believe that we ARE in fact not worth talking to. I feel the doubts just as much as you, if not more. But it’s up to us to force ourselves to take action anyways. Keep it up, man. You got this.
You are a therapist, it would be good if you talked about men who are fearful avoidants. I would love to know why they run away when they feel loved and then come back. Thanks.
A man living from a honor code do not give Answers that to Necessarily please . to himself.respect his views because that come from a place staying on course. Courage Integrity Compassion. Honesty..people pleasing hide your true self from others is saying that you don't mater desire and needs don't mater..allowing some one give to you.doctor Glover checked all the boxes for mine.! Today is the 1st day For the rest of your life
Nice is a bad word..have values and boundaries...controlling woman..will take over your life..learn to compromise and enjoy life...i told a woman my intentions and future plan....she met a older rebounding guy in a divorce with corporate job....and left me because her needs were better met...now we were a great couple people were envious..but now she has a flashy money guy.....good guys get dumped ...im now 65 and have not found a solid woman...in last 20 years...now im the rich sugar daddy...but im not attracted to woman after money..especially after this experience...any comments..todays society is all money conscious...its sad
Relationships have always been about exchanging resources for sexual access. It is the way thing are. Accept them and purchase what you can or live your life for yourself. Plenty of foreign ladies out there as well. Go get some!
You need a charismatic mixture of alpha and beta then you should be getting laid hopefully yes this guy is correct in a lot of the psychology of what he is explaining
Great question. In Mark Manson's book Models, he talks about how the problem with the pickup artist culture is that because it's inherently dishonest manipulation, you just end up reinforcing your own feelings of inadequacy: "I'm so worthless that I need to lie in order to get people to pay attention to me" So if you're doing these things just to "perform" for women, how would you ever respect yourself? And if you don't respect yourself, who's gonna respect you, you know?
@@LessCluelessPodcast just gets me concerned with content like this, it comes off sometimes (for me) you have to be this way to be a man. Then I question who dictates who I have to be
@@xenozillalv4263You don't have to be anything, bud. It's just advice. Nobody is saying "You have to be XYZ to be a real man" You're welcome to decide the advice isn't for you and move on.
So he is basically saying be a combination of alpha male and beta male and not just one or the other? As thats what i have been and most guys are either the bad boy alpha players and or the beta men who are as this video is about the nice guys betas but donr make mamy women wet on dates pardon pun
But how do you not do those hidden contracts. Then nobody would do anything for anybody lol. So you just look for the girls that have same neurosis as you being a good girl and doing stuff for you ? lol
Dr. Glover's point is to be honest and up front about your needs. If you want to date someone - ask them out. Don't do a bunch of favors for them and then think that they now owe you sex or affection for those favors.
@@LessCluelessPodcast so when in relationships you d only do something for the partner if they clearly ask you or you just really wanted to do something for them , or things that you agreed upon like who’s walking the dogs in the mornings 🤔 I guess .. makes sense. Vs the system where both people just trying to do as much for each other as possible by default. Cuz they love the person they r with idk 💁🏻♂️
@@Happy-I-Am- Of course you can do things without people asking you - given that you do it unconditionally, without expecting something in return (Covert Contract)
@@LessCluelessPodcast well I guess I’m finally coming to phrasing the question correctly - why do things for anybody at all then 💁🏻♂️ if it’s not contractual. Like what kind of good will should it be to be doing charity for an extended period of time - isn’t that just simping ? 🤔
@@Happy-I-Am-I agree that if there's a prolonged imbalance in effort and your needs are not met, you should leave that relationship. But there's a big difference between 1. Two people fulfilling each other's needs out of love, and 2. Doing every little thing in a calculated, hidden, tit-for-tat way. The point of doing nice things for people we care about is because it feels good as an end to itself (In philosophy/religion: "To give is more blessed than to receive") But nice guys/SIMPS don't give because it feels good, they do it to get something in return (attention, sex, etc.), and they ENDLESSLY give. That's the problem.
"Aren't you glad we're married now, so we don't have to pretend to like sex anymore?"
That is pure gold 🤮
Listened to the audiobook, then read the book. Doctor Glover changed my life. Guy seriously read his book or listen to the audiobook, especially in these times with media.
I just purchased the book, off eBay. Normally, you can get many many books dirt cheap off eBay - but very often blockbuster self-help books cost more - but this was worth it. Waiting for it to arrive...
Trust me mate, the book will speak in volumes to you. When listening to it was in the beginning very hard because he touched on so many truths about myself without even meeting me. I hope you don’t have to wait to long for the book mate. 🤘
I've realised that lack of vision/passion is the main reason we tend to instead focus on women, alcohol, drugs and other addictions
I have vision and passion, yet I am still nice guy. It is true that I fear perusing my vision and passion because of my fear of not being good enough. And that's where I turn to woman and their validation. So it's not end all be all to just have vision and passion. But it's definetly first step.
wow you got him as a guest with 500 subs! I don't mean it to diminish your subscriber number because relative to where I heard him speak they usually have millions of subs. You are very skilled at inviting guests and standing out, I'd like to have this confidence within myself and not feel imposter syndrome when making my own content.
Thanks for the support. I hear you. Actually, the next video is about this exact topic - overcoming limiting beliefs. Dr. G was definitely very generous to take the time to speak with an unknown. Yet, at the same time, if we conduct ourselves like we're not worth talking to, then people are gonna believe that we ARE in fact not worth talking to. I feel the doubts just as much as you, if not more. But it’s up to us to force ourselves to take action anyways. Keep it up, man. You got this.
Dr Glover is very balanced in his explanation of the nice guy syndrome
This is gold! Not finished yet but enjoying it so far
Thanks for this conversation. I learned a lot, and I am indeed a nice guy. Maybe there is hope
Great information it was so hard to pull myself to listen to this knowing how hard it hit home and how much work I need to do
This is so helpful this is what i needed to know
Thank you so much. Super Helpful
You are a therapist, it would be good if you talked about men who are fearful avoidants.
I would love to know why they run away when they feel loved and then come back.
Thanks.
Check out Connor Beaton's work on the channel Mantalks, he does good work on Attachment Theory.
@@LessCluelessPodcast thanks 😊
I'm a dude. I'd say low interest, or him needing to escape your demands (expectations), is the bigger issue. If he wants you, he wants you.
Absolute one of the best podcast ! Love it !
greetings from tokyo japan 🇯🇵
Greetings to you from Saint Louis, Missouri, in the middle of America!
Great job guys
I remember a small book called You Suck by Paulie Amigo that helped me wake up. Goes great with Glovers book too.
This is fantastic
Very,very good podcast. Congrats.
I have your book i need to read it
Loving the podcast
A man living from a honor code do not give Answers that to Necessarily please . to himself.respect his views because that come from a place staying on course. Courage Integrity Compassion. Honesty..people pleasing hide your true self from others is saying that you don't mater desire and needs don't mater..allowing some one give to you.doctor Glover checked all the boxes for mine.! Today is the 1st day For the rest of your life
Great interview again! we can see you're both enjoying
Nice is a bad word..have values and boundaries...controlling woman..will take over your life..learn to compromise and enjoy life...i told a woman my intentions and future plan....she met a older rebounding guy in a divorce with corporate job....and left me because her needs were better met...now we were a great couple people were envious..but now she has a flashy money guy.....good guys get dumped ...im now 65 and have not found a solid woman...in last 20 years...now im the rich sugar daddy...but im not attracted to woman after money..especially after this experience...any comments..todays society is all money conscious...its sad
This is very poor writing
Relationships have always been about exchanging resources for sexual access. It is the way thing are. Accept them and purchase what you can or live your life for yourself. Plenty of foreign ladies out there as well. Go get some!
I really thought it was Jim Carrey on the Thumbnail.
who tought it was an old and bald jim carrey on the thumbnail?
Bro why does he look like Jim Carey with an age filter in the thumbnail? 😂
Thank you! I was looking for that comment!
I thought it was Jared Leto with an age filter 😅
@@awizardlizard6793🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉😂🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 45:26 🎉🎉 45:31 🎉🎉🎉 45:38 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 45:58 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 46:08 🎉🎉🎉🎉 46:11 🎉🎉🎉😂😂🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉😂🎉🎉🎉🎉 46:28 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 46:47 😢🎉🎉 46:58 46:59 🎉🎉 47:07 47:09 🎉😂🎉🎉 47:23 47:24 47:25 47:32 🎉 47:36 🎉 47:40 47:41 47:41 🎉 47:42 😂 47:51 🎉🎉🎉 47:57 🎉😢🎉🎉🎉 48:09 🤪🎉 48:10 🤔🤪☺️🤪😗🤪🎉😗 48:18 😗🤪 48:19 😗🤪 48:20 🤔🤫🤔🎉 48:22 🤔 48:23 🤔🤔😶🌫️😶🌫️ 48:25 😶🌫️🎉🤳🤳🎉😂😂 48:44 48:49 🎉😅 49:00 🎉 49:13 49:15 👱 49:18
What is the contrary of "nice guy"
Integrated man
Fug being a nice guy.😮
Integrated gentlemen…
You need a charismatic mixture of alpha and beta then you should be getting laid hopefully yes this guy is correct in a lot of the psychology of what he is explaining
45:45
If you making these kind of chamges because this is what woman want or need, are you still technically a nice guy?
Great question. In Mark Manson's book Models, he talks about how the problem with the pickup artist culture is that because it's inherently dishonest manipulation, you just end up reinforcing your own feelings of inadequacy: "I'm so worthless that I need to lie in order to get people to pay attention to me" So if you're doing these things just to "perform" for women, how would you ever respect yourself? And if you don't respect yourself, who's gonna respect you, you know?
@@LessCluelessPodcast just gets me concerned with content like this, it comes off sometimes (for me) you have to be this way to be a man. Then I question who dictates who I have to be
@@xenozillalv4263You don't have to be anything, bud. It's just advice. Nobody is saying "You have to be XYZ to be a real man" You're welcome to decide the advice isn't for you and move on.
So he is basically saying be a combination of alpha male and beta male and not just one or the other? As thats what i have been and most guys are either the bad boy alpha players and or the beta men who are as this video is about the nice guys betas but donr make mamy women wet on dates pardon pun
❤🎉
But how do you not do those hidden contracts. Then nobody would do anything for anybody lol. So you just look for the girls that have same neurosis as you being a good girl and doing stuff for you ? lol
Dr. Glover's point is to be honest and up front about your needs. If you want to date someone - ask them out. Don't do a bunch of favors for them and then think that they now owe you sex or affection for those favors.
@@LessCluelessPodcast so when in relationships you d only do something for the partner if they clearly ask you or you just really wanted to do something for them , or things that you agreed upon like who’s walking the dogs in the mornings 🤔 I guess .. makes sense. Vs the system where both people just trying to do as much for each other as possible by default. Cuz they love the person they r with idk 💁🏻♂️
@@Happy-I-Am- Of course you can do things without people asking you - given that you do it unconditionally, without expecting something in return (Covert Contract)
@@LessCluelessPodcast well I guess I’m finally coming to phrasing the question correctly - why do things for anybody at all then 💁🏻♂️ if it’s not contractual. Like what kind of good will should it be to be doing charity for an extended period of time - isn’t that just simping ? 🤔
@@Happy-I-Am-I agree that if there's a prolonged imbalance in effort and your needs are not met, you should leave that relationship. But there's a big difference between 1. Two people fulfilling each other's needs out of love, and 2. Doing every little thing in a calculated, hidden, tit-for-tat way. The point of doing nice things for people we care about is because it feels good as an end to itself (In philosophy/religion: "To give is more blessed than to receive") But nice guys/SIMPS don't give because it feels good, they do it to get something in return (attention, sex, etc.), and they ENDLESSLY give. That's the problem.