I was very happy to be able to sit down with Dr. Robert Glover ("No More Mr. Nice Guy") for a long chat the other day. When he wasn't cracking me up with his off-color honesty, we touched on a number of topics in our collective wheelhouse, including: love, attraction, authenticity, and men's need for a "tribe". My sexy grumble is my throat recovering from the flu. Enjoy. Dr. Glover's men's community: integrationnation.net/ Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: ruclips.net/video/WrXBzQ2HDEQ/видео.html Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: ruclips.net/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #dating #relationship
After listening to this, I tried to think of things to ask my wife to do for me. I find it very difficult. It’s like when people ask me what I want for Christmas or my birthday. I can’t think of things then either.
Interesting tidbit. I opened another tab while the video was on, in order to obtain the book with the Alice Cooper song title in common. As I pushed the button to order, Dr. Glover said, "What happened?" Tell him Kurt, who is as extravagant as Jack Benny, purchased a USED hardback copy. I REALLY need this. At 61, I almost considered a bad "career" mentioned if I did not figure this out. Thanks.
The Goat DR. GLOVER Edit: The best way to get out of a covert contract is to be in an overt contract by expressing, stating, or asking what your wants and needs are to her. The goal is not to get the girl, the goal is to see if the women is a good fit in your life.
@@beebee_0136You're not trying to get a girl to like you , to have sex with you, or to marry you. All you doing is vetting on what kind of woman she is to see If you want her in your life or not. Two big things you can test her in is if she actually likes you and can she reciprocate sexual affection. If not move on to a different woman.
Yes this exactly. Ive made objective statements to the women I’ve dated to see if they’ll fall in line or will continue to do the things they were vetted for. What are we? Well I don’t women in a monogamous manner that do X Y Z. Could be have exs or other men in orbit, posting pics, use snap chat ect. Making the contract overt is mandatory.
@@beebee_0136 indeed it is, however this is a game of chances. The truth is that to some degree you can predict some of the outcomes or decisions. Before marrying that person, there are ways (and not only one) to see if his/her ideas and commitment aligns with yours. How good of a job you will do in this assurance will dictate future potential problems.
@@beebee_0136 But it does at least reduce the probability of this caveat happening. No one ever said it's foolproof. In fact, no "solution" is 100% foolproof. What's the saying? "There's no such thing as solutions, only trade-offs"? We can tinker at the edges to reduce likelihood of failures in pretty much anything in life... that's all. Just do the best we can. Because we have no perfect options.
From all stoic philiosophers Eictetus and Seneca are my favorit, but stoicism might be a wrong approach for a person who is enslaved for the most of his life. Maybe, more rebelious attitudes are needed?
His book was given to me by a college friend 15 years ago, and I passed it on to another young man since. Dr. Glover has changed my life for the better!
Nearly every man starts as a nice guy because we have so little options when we are young and dont want to take risks. Therefore everybody goes through that stage until he realizes he does not get what he wants and then sees the reality.
Ugly blokes see attractive men get an advantage over other attractive men by being more kind, and they think that they can also compete with kindness 😂😂😂😂
Idk Nice Guy syndrome is different than a simple scarcity mindset. It's childhood trauma related to attachment and it goes beyond our relationships with women
I firmly believe in the axiom that a woman has to choose you for the relationship to work, you can't make someone do things for you if they are indifferent to you, if she doesn't want to do for you, you need to move on immediately. And that includes sex in a marriage, if she doesn't enjoy and seek to have sex and she's your wife. Its time to get out. She has no respect for you.
@@snakegriffin4928 yes , hypergamy is often the downfall of many relationships . Women often perceive an option to be better but are often fool themselves.
100% - never put her on pedestal or treat her like an equal. she will try shittests with "you are looking down on me", don't fall for it. Once she thinks she is equal she looses respect it's all over
After 20 years of me working, providing 100% of family finances while my wife was a housewife, it was all OK. Then kids grow up and she starts working. I ask for 50/50 split of expenses and she said she lost all respect for me, and she wants a divorce.😂😂😂😂
Idk where it originated from, but a dating coach said this and it held a lot of truth to me. He said "don't become a better salesman, become a better product." Ofc there are things you can work on to clean up your selling strategy, but you will find guaranteed results if you start by becoming a better version of yourself!
Two of the GREATEST voices for Men coming together for this episode, truly impactful. Love & support to my fellow men becoming the best/happiest version of ourselves 💯!
its not just that. most men in his situation would not have the success with women he had. His success came from studying game and developing his own style. In his book "no more mr nice guy" he states learned dating buy studying game like a scientist. not fair to completely ignore that
@@GUITARTIME2024 his wife is also 20 years younger than him. it would be like a 20 year old marrying a 40 year old man. if anything it should motivate you more
If you attractive it's easy. When women are attracted to you, then they come to you. Therefore, these men can carry themselves as if they are indifferent to female attention simply because they have a boat full of options.
I’ve watched the full video and my Key takeaway was: 1. Orion is actually out here in the dating world and sees it for what it is. 2. Dr. Glover is a married man who’s been hitched longtime ago, and mostly operate on what he thinks ‘should be’. I like Dr. Glover, but just like Jordan Peterson i notice that even if they’re not very far off, they’re out of touch with how the dating market works now, due to their absence from it for decades. Or maybe they do know what’s going on, but can’t fully bring themselves to be ‘Real’ about it because it would negatively impact their personal relationships.
Jordan Peterson and his wife are much older and come from a different generation. Dr Glovers 3rd wife (although much younger get) is still older when they met and she’s from Mexico. So different generation and different culture. So although they are right on many points, some of their recommendations are just not realistic. They are designed for a different group of women who don’t exist. That being said when just dating almost all their advice is solid.
Yea great take, Dr. Orion had much more solid advice, perhaps the other Dr. is a bit outdated, I’m very grateful to have people like Dr. Orion on the scene 🙏
One of the BEST interviews I have seen ever on this subject. During your discussion I had to pause rewind and replay just so I heard it correctly. I paused your video multiple times and shared it with multiple people, Including with my 33 year old son who is coming out of a shitty relationship with a small child involved, his best friend who seems to always strike out, and two of my good buddies who are getting out of relationships and just need a pick me up. This video was also sent to my sister who has asked multiple times how I have attracted so many highly educated, successful women. That was finally explained to me in the 9:32 to around the 16:00 mark. I march to a different drummer, not my choice, but because I am too lazy to put a facade.
You guys are priceless, loved the taxi cab analogy, been there. Sold the Cab and went sailing, female crew come and go now and a signed contract to ensure they leave or only stay onboard on my terms. Great stuff.
Great dynamics in this discussion. This is a perfect example of generational differences in understanding oneself and relationships with women. Baby Boomer men and older relied almost solely on instinctive masculinity and stoicism. Whereas the younger generation of men is more formally educated, overly thoughtful, and inundated with massive amounts of information causing them to overthink the simplest interactions with the female species.
I have to relate for a minute... I was married to the same woman for 21 years. Now divorced, but she could not handle if I was sick, weakened or hurt or depressed. I was basically not allowed to have feelings that were anything less than neutral. Now many years ago I tried the Mr. sensitive approach and it did not have a very good result. When I had a hernia, I felt dehumanized if not it was like as if I were a car that was broken down rather than a human being with actual feelings. Ive come to realize women are not caring, supportive, emotional or physical creatures. I have to take care of myself and no one will do it for me. the only reason a woman will ever take any care of me at all is if she thinks it will serve her like servicing a car and most women can even seem to put air in their car tires.. . Call me a new mysoginist if you wish, but I think women are kind of useless for anything but sex; in my experience. Heck after surgery , and I didnt take the pain meds, even my own mom was like "get up" when she stopped over... To hell with women. No more mr. nice guy is right.
Sadly I’ve yet to date a woman that could handle me being a bit down Or depressed. Despite what modern society is saying the vast majority of women do not like signs of weakness in their man.
Btw I think my mother is a great person overall but I look back and see how she handled it when my dad was sick or had issues and I cringe .. suffice to say she wasn’t exactly that supportive or caring in those moments.
@@marcuschauvin7039 flu cold convid19 are all frauds Those symtoms are due to mucus build up & dampened immune systwm by: 1. High sugar intake 2. Low vitamin d3 (sunshine) 3. Sedentary living 4. Insufficient sleep Those 4 points are combined over the autumn & winter months beginning Thanksgiving/Halloween through December holidays, and taper off end of February Those holidays filled with sweets + low sunshine + staying inactive indoors + staying up late are the cause of so called seasonal flu and colds and convid19 Notice it doesnt happen in Africa or Texas or southern Florida or Brazil It only happens when those holidays coincide with dark indoor winters.
This is a great talk. I am getting thru a breakup and this makes so much sense. Thank you for letting me reflect on my actions. I will be better from now on.
Being yourself is euphemistic for be confident in your weaknesses, vulnerability, AND strengths and don't be ashamed of who you are in the given moment. It's a fluid and dynamic process that requires a steadfast belief in yourself unashamedly.
Great to see you too converse. Being yourself is attractive. As an actor it’s the same thing. You present yourself honestly. Its not your job for them to choose you and if they don’t it’s nothing you did.
omg I totally agree.... "chose a woman that choses you "or your going to be chasing the whole time and its going to suck. to hell with chasing after beautiful women; the one with the cosmetic defect that you an overlook but no one else can will bring so much more peace of mind and peace of mind is priceless.
Agree I have known guys that chase women that have shown very little if any interest in them and that’s pointless. Even if they do end up dating he is going to have to work very hard to keep her interest. Much better off going with women that show strong interest in you right off the bat . That said, many guys struggle with attracting any women in that way
I love you guys. This was awesome to watch, fun and enlightening. It's such a fun time when men can gather together to unwind with conversations and laughs.
This is possibly the best podcast I've heard on the topic of attraction ever? Certainly top 3-5. The concept of outcome indifference and the fact that there's almost nothing you can do to make a woman like you, so just relax and try and get to rejection quickly so you can move on is some big food for thought. It matches my experience with business. I started a freelance photography business 8 years ago and at the beginning, I used to bend over and give discounts and constantly follow up on enquiries to try and get clients to say yes, and I think I mostly just chased them away with my desperation and each rejection hurt really bad. Now, I just tell it like it is and say (metaphorically) like it or lump it, and I get much better results, but when I do get rejected, it doesn't hurt nearly as much, because I know I'll get more enquiries tomorrow. For some reason, when it comes to relationships, I still have a massive fear of rejection that stops me from approaching women. I just need to translate what I've done in business into my personal relationships and maybe that'll help.
"Abundance" - why don't Chat or Tyrone give a damn about a woman? Which then actually works in their favor! Also, don't approach women - stay on your grind, enjoy your life - maybe she will try to join you - if not: your money, your life, no strife.
@@ibubezi7685 The tricky thing is, women don't want to approach either, because they see that as the man's job. So if they don't approach and we don't approach, nobody approaches and we all lose! I think the key is probably not to stop approaching, but once we've done it, don't care so much about getting a no, and don't keep trying (flogging a dead horse).
@@mdhazeldine Ask married guys what they lost - and what they gained - and if they would do it again. I feel you don't lose if nobody approaches anyone (anymore) - "their loss" (not yours). And, it's better to be successful in sales than with women 😉
@@ibubezi7685 While that may work out for certain individuals, it will be terrible for society as a whole. It's not a sustainable answer to the problem.
Thank you both, gentlemen, for an informative, entertaining and thought provoking discussion, it's very much appreciated. It would be fantastic to see more in the future.
Great talk overall. But I'm so tired of every guy who says "why do I need to play these games to keep a relationship?" being written off as guys who don't want to do the work or just want to play videogames. That's not what we're saying. Hell, listen to your own stories in this very talk. Tell her you're sad, but don't tell her too much. She likes this guy this week, but this kind of guy that week. Don't do things for her, make her do things for you. THIS is what we're talking about. THESE are the games we're tired of playing. Men are tired of picking and choosing what they say and do because if they say or do a little too much or just not quite enough women flake out. It's not worth the effort when you can just invest in yourself and build the kind of life you want for yourself.
Agreed. I'm not a businessman, so I'm not rich, but as I'm in a branch of academia I'm very well-respected by my peers who are authors, academics, professors, and so on. In my field, and who I have to develop and maintain good professional relationships with at a high level, I command a lot of clout. Physically, I go to the gym and I've got a great physique for my age. I dress well, I'm well groomed, I carry myself with authority and presence (I have to, professionally), I speak with authority, again, because of my profession. All this gets noticed. But I don't tolerate women's games. I'm old enough to remember dating women and havi g affairs with them and I didn't have to jump through hoops and pass endless tests to keep them going. It indicates high narcissism if a woman is bringing games to the table.
@@EE12CSVT I understand and I’m 39 and I can’t remember the last woman that I dated that didn’t play any of these games. I see what my married friends go through and some break their back to keep their wife happy but it’s so short lived and the next day it starts over. I’m also in very good shape and can attract women fairly easily but the notion of a serious relationship just fills me with this feeling of almost dread. The entire dating game is just mind numbing to me at this point
@@brianmeen2158 The last time I met a woman who didn't play games was in 2007, and she was the only one in 24 years. I see the same thing as you do among married men - all bar three under the age of 60 I know have been crushed by their wives and turned into a shell of their former selves. I keep on hearing that they have to ask her permission to go out and enjoy their hobby, meet up with friends, buy something with money they earned, and so on. Like a boy asking permission from his mother. It's pathetic. I get plenty of attention - especially from married or taken women - but none know how to reciprocate. They think a relationshuo just means her sitting there looking pretty and being worshipped by her free servant.
@@EE12CSVTahh yes I know what you mean especially with attractive women - they don’t expect to have to put any effort in .. I’ve even caught rather average looking women doing this and in all fairness - why would they expect to put in work when 9 out of 10(probably 99 out of 100) guys will crawl through fire to sleep with them? This is what has warped modern dating - most guys have very little if any standards and will put a lot of work in to get with any woman that shows him the least bit interest. Then you have the outright simps which I don’t even know what to say about them at this point. So yeah it’s a mess Looking back it hurts to say that I struggle to remember any truly interesting “back and forth” conversations I’ve had with women I was attracted to.. I’m sure there were a few blips of decent convo but I don’t remember them ..
The message I got was there are many paths to the end goal. All work if you apply yourself. It’s like a spiritual practice- many paths to enlightenment. 🙏
I love the South Park episode where Kyle gets dumped. He got some advice to go outside her bedroom window and play Peter Gabriel. He played "Shock the Monkey"...
Great interview! I saw Dr Glover on another show last week and enjoy his positive realist views. Keep doing what you are doing Orion, great stuff and much appreciated!
So, Dr. Glover, it’s very nice that you found a considerate woman that will bring you fruit and support you. Sounds like you’re pretty lucky. Hell would freeze over before my wife would ever serve me.
Shaking my head at 10 minutes in where he’s like, “nobody knows what women are attracted to.” I thought the men’s movement had moved past this kind of woman-flattering happy talk. Can’t we grow up and say the truth: we know what women are attracted to, and we can say it, even though it is discouraging to men and unflattering to women.?
Dr Glover is great but is out of touch with modern women. Take what’s useful and discard the rest is how I learn best when listening to these personalities.
Glover is actually saying that what women tell you they are attracted to is probably not what they will actually like about you. He's not saying "oh it's a great mystery what these women like". There are general things that are obvious but at the end of the day, some women will like some guys for an unknown reason and they'll tell you it's "the X factor" or something like that. That's why he says choose women that choose you. He's also saying people find the "truth" attractive but he really means people find "authenticity" attractive.
Thank You. One crucial piece of the puzzle that hit home with me is ending things before the woman gets vindictive if desires aren't aligning. This was what happened to me, and back then I didn't have the courage to speak my entire truth, which got me heart caught in the grinder and led to a lot of confusion. Profound insights the two of you have. Another good statement is, a woman views her man through the lense of her attraction.
"It's the steongest motivation in the world for a guy is to want to get laid. " In multiple decades-worth of life experience, it's the desire for a woman's love and attention--not the desire to have sex her--that's the strongest motivation. I think this claim that sex/the desire to get laid being the highest level of motivation for wanting women that's so common in the Manosphere is wrong. Yes, the desire to get laid is by far, one of we men's strongest desires. But, we desire the love, affection, and companionship fron women more than the sexual part.
Interesting because in my case I don’t crave female companionship or affection - when I pursue women Im doing it for sex . Without the drive for sex I don’t think I’d pursue them at all
"outcome independence" is liberation. Plus: do hard things. Voluntarily. Doesn't matter gym, or ice baths, or becoming a black belt, or whatever. Do the work, challenge yourself, forge yourself independently of a goal of anything but your own quality of life.
Love it! What a great interview. Some of my close friends are NMMG coaches. It was great to listen to Dr Glover himself 😄 Ps: damn, Orion. I’m sorry you went through that horrible stuff. Indeed hell hath no fury like a woman scorned 😢😣
The taxi cab analogy is spot on. It doesn't matter how much you do for her (a "boil the ocean" project), the moment you want something in return she starts sleeping on the couch and contacts a divorce attorney.
But the problem is on us men to enter such dynamic in the first place. So we cannot blame women for that because she is (rightfully so) doing what's best. In a relationship, the person who is doing more and more invested in a dynamic (especially emotionally) is in a submissive position, while the one who is doing less and less invested is in a leading position. The former is the follower and the latter is the leader of that relationship. So what you're doing for her is nothing but a compensation for: 1. Her lack of interest in you 2. Your insecurities From my experience and observations, both women and men want a man to be the leader of the relationship and women to be in submissive position.
You describe pretty much all single women, and a big chunk of married ones. The last time I met a woman who reciprocated selflessly was in 2007, and she was the only one in some 24 years. I meet plenty of women, but it becomes apparent very early on that hell will freeze over before they reciprocate or don't expect to be treated as a princess and you her simp servant. The concept of mutual effort and mutual sacrifice is long since over.
@@mountainkid417Heck no, women fight tooth and nail to be the dominant one, and to NEVER be submissive to the man. Outside of elderly couples, I can only think of three couples where the woman happily allows the man to lead. In every other relationship, the woman is very much the leader, and the man was long since castrated. If you meet a woman, the first thing she does is figure out how easy you will be to control so she's in control of the relationship. If she discovers the guy can't be, and that he expects she'll allow him to lead, she's off to find a guy who she'll lead.
@@EE12CSVT That might apply to modern long-term romantic relationships/marriages... but not to the sexual marketplace and the psychology of sexual desire. A woman's innate, deep-seated sexual wiring will always compel her to crave the kind of man who is capable of dominating her in bed. This is why being a woman in a female-dominant relationship who regularly cheats---with or without the knowledge/permission of her submissive husband---is the ultimate fantasy for women who want (and believe they deserve) the best of both worlds. The extreme incarnation of this principle is the otherwise happily-married woman who openly dominates and cuckolds her husband; she gets any/all her needs met, and yet seeks (at least on occasion, or part-time basis) a man that she herself can submit to and look up to. This desire is so deep-rooted in women from an evolutionary perspective, that even the vast majority of women with dominant personalities are not immune to it. Humans are ultimately animals, and sexual desire is the most primal, animalistic instinct that exists. The same cannot be said for the quintessentially dominant man. If he finds and locks down a long-term relationship with a submissive woman who adores him and meets all his needs... his only possible need outside of that relationship/marriage may perhaps be occasional sex with other women. The major difference? The dominant husband will generally never be seeking outside sexual partners that are radically different from the ideal wife he already has... it's just more sex simply for variety's sake to spice things up. For the dominant wife, she's not just seeking sex for the sake of sex. She is seeking the kind of sexual experience that her husband can never provide her (regardless of how perfect he is for her in every other possible way).
@@mountainkid417yep! I know too many men that have spoiled their gf or wife rotten and then wonder why she isn’t happy or why she just wants more…? That is a huge problem these days - most guys have little or no standards and the only way they know to keep a woman satisfied is just doing everything she wants them to do. This has created a bad situation for everyone as it not only doesn’t make the woman happy but it makes it that much harder for other guys in the dating realm. It kills me that most guys will crawl through fire to sleep with a woman yet these same guys turn around and complain that women are entitled 🤔
Attraction is a combination of energetic signature and pheromones, behavior, and physical attributes that vary by person.personality, intelligence, sense of humor, confidence,
This is the 3rd time I've seen this episode started 2 yrs ago I think, now I understand it better than before, hes pretty right on ,as far as you need to start at loving or being comfortable with yourself first.
Hi guys. As an ex offender, ex drug addict who is now a public servant in uk. I now work with rough sleepers. I’m very transparent about my past and now am always truthful. I am now very attractive to people versus my past life of lies
Great Interview..."More you Come into Yourself" section...DG wasn't getting it but I do...she likes you and wants to try to blow thru a boundry..the crazy comes out that defines her even more...nice job!
I love that you two have teamed up. No more mr. Nice guy literally changed my life on my spiritual journey losing the best girl i almost had 🥲 i follow this channel to go deeper into it but this book was the lesson i needed that taught me why i am the way i am. Thank you
With all due respect, Dr G needs 2 return his advice 2 the 80's. Today is another world, I'm 67 & can assure you: Your advice & perspectives R better 4 this space @ this moment N time
Times have change since the 80's yes but what hasn't and will never change is human nature. Even though women's software have been infected by feminists today, their biology is still the same.
I love Dr. Glover’s work. He’s made my life better. I found his book at a difficult and important time in my life and I’m grateful. That said he’s not 100% right on everything. 1) he clearly doesn’t understand what “red pill” really means. 2) “Be yourself” is awful advice, especially for young people. Who really knows what their “true self” really is at 20? You are a product of your genes and environment but you certainly can craft yourself into a better person and one more attractive to women. And you should! Be myself at age 20 would mean watching too much porn, eating junk food, not working out, binge drinking, and being clueless about life. That’s terrible. Fortunately I didn’t accept that as “love me as I am; love myself as I am”. Instead I realized that this person is not who I want to be. I can be a better person. I learned about the world, what women really want, how to be a better man. Then I changed.
I agree. I think the state of being comfortable and authentic with yourself is something that takes a lot of time and experience, and that a 20-year old should instead focus on things he can do and good habits he can develop.
It is funny, because Dr. Glover explains how young men start to believe they were not good enough and therefor hide their true personality. This is exactly what you are doing RIGHT NOW! Maybe in a decade or two you will understand him.
Thank you Dr Taraban for a enlightening and insightful discussion. i sincerely appreciate your nuanced take on the current dating market. i disagree tho that you think women are acting in good faith in my experience women no longer view relationships as coexisting between equals to raise well adjusted children and date exclusively to aquire as much resources from men before monkey branching to the next. i dont see long term dating marrage or children as a realistic posibility in the west anymore. My question is can you please have author Aaron Clarey on your channel for a long form interview on this same topic? He's written extensively on this topic and i think would be very educational thank you for all you do.
This podcast ended way too soon! I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. It was interesting to hear both your takes on how to level up as a man and attracting women. Edit: I'd love for you to also bring Mark Manson on.
shows like this are an interesting departure from the norm, because the aspect of "iron sharpening iron" puts a finer edge on the points being made. Keep up the good work, guys!
Best book I've ever read no more Mr nice guy. I've read countless books and did many self development courses but nothing hit home like the Mr nice guy syndrome. I was extreme nice guy and it ruined my life. Thank you Dr g Only one negative comment in this interview is the emphasis on sex. Healthy sex with your wife or gf is essential but getting loads of women to sleep with you will cause alot of emotional issues as it did for me. I slept with alot of girls in my younger years and I honestly think it affects your relationships
This is an excellent interview - so much truth and insight. Much better than the videos on how to get the woman - that only works for hook-ups but this interview shows us men how to get the RIGHT girl to build a long term relationship with. Ultimately that will leave us much more satisfied than jumping from one fling to another.
Personally I like it when a Man speaks about His vulnerabilities . Being open . I don’t like it when a Man is trying to impress Me . When I can hear He is selling himself by concealing His true self . When a Guy is open I feel comfortable to be myself . It encourages Me to be more open .
4:32 I’ve heard that verse also translated as “love your neighbor, who is flawed like yourself”. As in, apply the same moral standards towards both your neighbor and yourself: have compassion for sins of weakness; and with discernment, righteously rebuke sins of malice.
44:00 example: if you mention you have to go buy some new clothes and ask the girl your dating/friends with if she'd mind coming along and giving her opinion theyre not only helping to tell you what you look attractive in, but if you then show grattitude and appreciation it becomes a positive bonding experience that can help the relationship along because willingly helping and doing good things for others actually brings them happiness too. in a crude way its kinda like how patting your dog might feel great for the dog, but you also have that positive experience from it as the one doing the patting.
Slow deep breaths, it is good to consider things. Also my favorite bumper sticker is , "Don't believe every thing you think" so in this case, i understand the point , of you have to love yourself rather than seeking it with another okay. However, i had 6 years with my Vietnamese GF,, and she died of Cancer. I like myself quite a bit, i do a better job of checking my own bullshit at the door, than most as your recent video was about , How ever,, The Tam &gg show, was what the World is looking for, so i understand Dr Glover's rap including no one who is suppose to love me loved me the way i needed, or some paraphrase and well, Tam and i had it and we did not need to say it , nor make a big deal out of it, we could just go drive down the Ocean, or walk in the woods by Moss beach, or stay home , it was clearly the charmed time. I live now well better than most but , that was the Charmed time, just to say, some of your bullshit, is
The arousal study that Dr. Glover covered was parsed out in depth by Dr. Daniel Bergner in his book "what women want". The interview Dr. Bergner took with Alan Roger Currie was incredible! Dr. Taraban, are you familiar with Alan Roger Curries work? Theres a massive overlap between his work and Dr. Glovers. In fact both have spoke at 21
Love is fleeting when it comes from a woman. When you have to play these roles and jump through hoops then the love is not unconditional. Yeah you cant let yourself go obviously but I find men to be more unconditionally loving to their spouse.
xx.s are by evo.psych nature incapable of 'love' as well as 'empathy' either. beyond mere opportunistically conditional attachment as for 1st, and (pot. narcissistically) solipsistic self-made projections in 2nd regard. beyond, hypergamy won't care, and briffault's law is enacted...
38:35 I'd assume the more of afore, the less of space or even need for an xx will be vacant. as dr. t had it elsewhere: gents try to mititigate cost | loss in view of rel.ships, xx.s contemplate highest possible gains. (both in cost | benefit analyses).
I was very happy to be able to sit down with Dr. Robert Glover ("No More Mr. Nice Guy") for a long chat the other day. When he wasn't cracking me up with his off-color honesty, we touched on a number of topics in our collective wheelhouse, including: love, attraction, authenticity, and men's need for a "tribe". My sexy grumble is my throat recovering from the flu. Enjoy.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #relationship
After listening to this, I tried to think of things to ask my wife to do for me. I find it very difficult. It’s like when people ask me what I want for Christmas or my birthday. I can’t think of things then either.
2 ex-wives and a bankruptcy under his belt? Why would I want to listen to him?
Interesting tidbit. I opened another tab while the video was on, in order to obtain the book with the Alice Cooper song title in common. As I pushed the button to order, Dr. Glover said, "What happened?" Tell him Kurt, who is as extravagant as Jack Benny, purchased a USED hardback copy. I REALLY need this. At 61, I almost considered a bad "career" mentioned if I did not figure this out. Thanks.
ur kinda argumentative without actually listening to the older dudes bro lol
Sexual marked place Value.. Say something better
The Goat DR. GLOVER
Edit: The best way to get out of a covert contract is to be in an overt contract by expressing, stating, or asking what your wants and needs are to her. The goal is not to get the girl, the goal is to see if the women is a good fit in your life.
Caveat: All of these dynamics change once marriage and children are involved. What's obtainable in theory is not the same as practice.
@@beebee_0136You're not trying to get a girl to like you , to have sex with you, or to marry you. All you doing is vetting on what kind of woman she is to see If you want her in your life or not. Two big things you can test her in is if she actually likes you and can she reciprocate sexual affection. If not move on to a different woman.
Yes this exactly. Ive made objective statements to the women I’ve dated to see if they’ll fall in line or will continue to do the things they were vetted for. What are we? Well I don’t women in a monogamous manner that do X Y Z. Could be have exs or other men in orbit, posting pics, use snap chat ect.
Making the contract overt is mandatory.
@@beebee_0136 indeed it is, however this is a game of chances.
The truth is that to some degree you can predict some of the outcomes or decisions. Before marrying that person, there are ways (and not only one) to see if his/her ideas and commitment aligns with yours. How good of a job you will do in this assurance will dictate future potential problems.
@@beebee_0136 But it does at least reduce the probability of this caveat happening. No one ever said it's foolproof. In fact, no "solution" is 100% foolproof. What's the saying? "There's no such thing as solutions, only trade-offs"? We can tinker at the edges to reduce likelihood of failures in pretty much anything in life... that's all. Just do the best we can. Because we have no perfect options.
“How long are you going to wait before you demand the best for yourself?”
- Epictetus
'The best' has a very specific meaning there.
Or the best “of yourself”, which is probably what was the actual quote
I don't deserve it.
From all stoic philiosophers Eictetus and Seneca are my favorit, but stoicism might be a wrong approach for a person who is enslaved for the most of his life. Maybe, more rebelious attitudes are needed?
@@snakegriffin4928 Correct.
His book was given to me by a college friend 15 years ago, and I passed it on to another young man since. Dr. Glover has changed my life for the better!
Such a great book
Nearly every man starts as a nice guy because we have so little options when we are young and dont want to take risks. Therefore everybody goes through that stage until he realizes he does not get what he wants and then sees the reality.
Ugly blokes see attractive men get an advantage over other attractive men by being more kind, and they think that they can also compete with kindness 😂😂😂😂
Agreed, natural progression
Idk
Nice Guy syndrome is different than a simple scarcity mindset. It's childhood trauma related to attachment and it goes beyond our relationships with women
Orion Taraban, that sounds like the name of a Jedi Master in STAR WARS.
I don't think he really likes it. Watch his interview with Rob Ager and see how he responds to Ager's compliment.
It's a fantastic name in my opinion, he's fortunate to have it.
I firmly believe in the axiom that a woman has to choose you for the relationship to work, you can't make someone do things for you if they are indifferent to you, if she doesn't want to do for you, you need to move on immediately.
And that includes sex in a marriage, if she doesn't enjoy and seek to have sex and she's your wife. Its time to get out. She has no respect for you.
This is why men should ALWAYS marry down. The moment she realizes or thinks she’s better or can do better than you, it’s over.
@@snakegriffin4928 yes , hypergamy is often the downfall of many relationships . Women often perceive an option to be better but are often fool themselves.
100% - never put her on pedestal or treat her like an equal. she will try shittests with "you are looking down on me", don't fall for it. Once she thinks she is equal she looses respect it's all over
After 20 years of me working, providing 100% of family finances while my wife was a housewife, it was all OK.
Then kids grow up and she starts working. I ask for 50/50 split of expenses and she said she lost all respect for me, and she wants a divorce.😂😂😂😂
@@dinsel9691 yep, as a woman, I would too. Lol
Idk where it originated from, but a dating coach said this and it held a lot of truth to me. He said "don't become a better salesman, become a better product." Ofc there are things you can work on to clean up your selling strategy, but you will find guaranteed results if you start by becoming a better version of yourself!
"Comfortable in his own skin, knows where he's going, and looks like he's having a good time going there"
@@GeorgiDimitrovX , this right here. 💯
This is one of the best conversations I’ve seen on RUclips about dating, relationships, being a man and showing up for yourself!!
Two of the GREATEST voices for Men coming together for this episode, truly impactful. Love & support to my fellow men becoming the best/happiest version of ourselves 💯!
The reason women are attracted to him nowadays, is because the women that age have figured out that they don't have as many options as they used too.
Zero self awareness all ego
Yep. My thoughtvexactly. He makes many good points but his wife is a Mexican single mom masseuse.
What reason did he put forth instead ? Im curious
its not just that. most men in his situation would not have the success with women he had. His success came from studying game and developing his own style. In his book "no more mr nice guy" he states learned dating buy studying game like a scientist. not fair to completely ignore that
@@GUITARTIME2024 his wife is also 20 years younger than him. it would be like a 20 year old marrying a 40 year old man. if anything it should motivate you more
75 minutes is too short for two calibers of this magnitude! Hope we’ll see an episode II, I enjoyed it greatly 😃
Totally
yeah I saw that it was an hour and 15 minutes and I was a bit disappointed lol
If you attractive it's easy. When women are attracted to you, then they come to you. Therefore, these men can carry themselves as if they are indifferent to female attention simply because they have a boat full of options.
Caveat: All these dynamics change when marriage and children are involved. Please bear that in mind.
Two of amazing guys that had an enormous impact on my self help journey. Completely changed my perspective on many occasions.
Same here... And may i add, David Deida too? :)
@@Claus1234hey Clause, we won’t eat the bugs and we will own things and be happy 😂
I’ve watched the full video and my Key takeaway was:
1. Orion is actually out here in the dating world and sees it for what it is.
2. Dr. Glover is a married man who’s been hitched longtime ago, and mostly operate on what he thinks ‘should be’.
I like Dr. Glover, but just like Jordan Peterson i notice that even if they’re not very far off, they’re out of touch with how the dating market works now, due to their absence from it for decades. Or maybe they do know what’s going on, but can’t fully bring themselves to be ‘Real’ about it because it would negatively impact their personal relationships.
Jordan Peterson and his wife are much older and come from a different generation. Dr Glovers 3rd wife (although much younger get) is still older when they met and she’s from Mexico. So different generation and different culture. So although they are right on many points, some of their recommendations are just not realistic. They are designed for a different group of women who don’t exist. That being said when just dating almost all their advice is solid.
Yea great take, Dr. Orion had much more solid advice, perhaps the other Dr. is a bit outdated, I’m very grateful to have people like Dr. Orion on the scene 🙏
When he says he had some of his best success in his late 40s and 50s, that's probably not more than 10 years ago. That's pretty recent.
@@dr.d3011We are not all dead yet BUT suitable for the older generation.
Agreed. He’s academically intelligent but he’s not in the field.
One of the BEST interviews I have seen ever on this subject. During your discussion I had to pause rewind and replay just so I heard it correctly. I paused your video multiple times and shared it with multiple people, Including with my 33 year old son who is coming out of a shitty relationship with a small child involved, his best friend who seems to always strike out, and two of my good buddies who are getting out of relationships and just need a pick me up.
This video was also sent to my sister who has asked multiple times how I have attracted so many highly educated, successful women. That was finally explained to me in the 9:32 to around the 16:00 mark. I march to a different drummer, not my choice, but because I am too lazy to put a facade.
You guys are priceless, loved the taxi cab analogy, been there. Sold the Cab and went sailing, female crew come and go now and a signed contract to ensure they leave or only stay onboard on my terms. Great stuff.
Great dynamics in this discussion. This is a perfect example of generational differences in understanding oneself and relationships with women. Baby Boomer men and older relied almost solely on instinctive masculinity and stoicism. Whereas the younger generation of men is more formally educated, overly thoughtful, and inundated with massive amounts of information causing them to overthink the simplest interactions with the female species.
I have to relate for a minute... I was married to the same woman for 21 years. Now divorced, but she could not handle if I was sick, weakened or hurt or depressed. I was basically not allowed to have feelings that were anything less than neutral. Now many years ago I tried the Mr. sensitive approach and it did not have a very good result. When I had a hernia, I felt dehumanized if not it was like as if I were a car that was broken down rather than a human being with actual feelings. Ive come to realize women are not caring, supportive, emotional or physical creatures. I have to take care of myself and no one will do it for me. the only reason a woman will ever take any care of me at all is if she thinks it will serve her like servicing a car and most women can even seem to put air in their car tires.. . Call me a new mysoginist if you wish, but I think women are kind of useless for anything but sex; in my experience. Heck after surgery , and I didnt take the pain meds, even my own mom was like "get up" when she stopped over... To hell with women. No more mr. nice guy is right.
You’re 100% correct.
I now even look at a my own 3 daughters with a mixed sense of love, sorrow, contemp and awe. It's just a hard fact of human nature
Sadly I’ve yet to date a woman that could handle me being a bit down
Or depressed. Despite what modern society is saying the vast majority of women do not like signs of weakness in their man.
@@JoshOchoa-h2vhuman nature is not inherently good but many still seem to think it is
Btw I think my mother is a great person overall but I look back and see how she handled it when my dad was sick or had issues and I cringe .. suffice to say she wasn’t exactly that supportive or caring in those moments.
Dr. Orion sounding DEEP today.
Future in Voice Acting on the side.
Yeah, I was wondering if he was fighting a cold.
flu maybe? its running through my house.
If he wants a chance of winning that fight, he should pick up boxing classes. @@rob21
@@marcuschauvin7039 flu cold convid19 are all frauds
Those symtoms are due to mucus build up & dampened immune systwm by:
1. High sugar intake
2. Low vitamin d3 (sunshine)
3. Sedentary living
4. Insufficient sleep
Those 4 points are combined over the autumn & winter months beginning Thanksgiving/Halloween through December holidays, and taper off end of February
Those holidays filled with sweets + low sunshine + staying inactive indoors + staying up late are the cause of so called seasonal flu and colds and convid19
Notice it doesnt happen in Africa or Texas or southern Florida or Brazil
It only happens when those holidays coincide with dark indoor winters.
He actually used to be an actor
This is a great talk. I am getting thru a breakup and this makes so much sense. Thank you for letting me reflect on my actions. I will be better from now on.
Being yourself is euphemistic for be confident in your weaknesses, vulnerability, AND strengths and don't be ashamed of who you are in the given moment.
It's a fluid and dynamic process that requires a steadfast belief in yourself unashamedly.
What a great bunch of information even for us ladies!!! Loved the interaction!
Great to see you too converse. Being yourself is attractive. As an actor it’s the same thing. You present yourself honestly. Its not your job for them to choose you and if they don’t it’s nothing you did.
omg I totally agree.... "chose a woman that choses you "or your going to be chasing the whole time and its going to suck. to hell with chasing after beautiful women; the one with the cosmetic defect that you an overlook but no one else can will bring so much more peace of mind and peace of mind is priceless.
For every hot woman, there is a hot guy who is sick and tired of dealing with her shayt
@@dinsel9691well said :D
Agree I have known guys that chase women that have shown very little if any interest in them and that’s pointless. Even if they do end up dating he is going to have to work very hard to keep her interest. Much better off going with women that show strong interest in you right off the bat . That said, many guys struggle with attracting any women in that way
You know what kind of women I like? The kind that like me.
Moving forward, I hope we have more collaborations like these ❤.
I love you guys. This was awesome to watch, fun and enlightening. It's such a fun time when men can gather together to unwind with conversations and laughs.
This is possibly the best podcast I've heard on the topic of attraction ever? Certainly top 3-5. The concept of outcome indifference and the fact that there's almost nothing you can do to make a woman like you, so just relax and try and get to rejection quickly so you can move on is some big food for thought. It matches my experience with business. I started a freelance photography business 8 years ago and at the beginning, I used to bend over and give discounts and constantly follow up on enquiries to try and get clients to say yes, and I think I mostly just chased them away with my desperation and each rejection hurt really bad. Now, I just tell it like it is and say (metaphorically) like it or lump it, and I get much better results, but when I do get rejected, it doesn't hurt nearly as much, because I know I'll get more enquiries tomorrow. For some reason, when it comes to relationships, I still have a massive fear of rejection that stops me from approaching women. I just need to translate what I've done in business into my personal relationships and maybe that'll help.
"Abundance" - why don't Chat or Tyrone give a damn about a woman? Which then actually works in their favor! Also, don't approach women - stay on your grind, enjoy your life - maybe she will try to join you - if not: your money, your life, no strife.
@@ibubezi7685 The tricky thing is, women don't want to approach either, because they see that as the man's job. So if they don't approach and we don't approach, nobody approaches and we all lose! I think the key is probably not to stop approaching, but once we've done it, don't care so much about getting a no, and don't keep trying (flogging a dead horse).
@@mdhazeldine Ask married guys what they lost - and what they gained - and if they would do it again.
I feel you don't lose if nobody approaches anyone (anymore) - "their loss" (not yours).
And, it's better to be successful in sales than with women 😉
@@ibubezi7685 While that may work out for certain individuals, it will be terrible for society as a whole. It's not a sustainable answer to the problem.
Excellent comment about take it or leave it attitude. Back yourself 👍🏿
Thank you both, gentlemen, for an informative, entertaining and thought provoking discussion, it's very much appreciated. It would be fantastic to see more in the future.
This was a great discussion.. thanks Orion n Robert.
The cab analogy was spot on as well
Great talk overall. But I'm so tired of every guy who says "why do I need to play these games to keep a relationship?" being written off as guys who don't want to do the work or just want to play videogames.
That's not what we're saying. Hell, listen to your own stories in this very talk. Tell her you're sad, but don't tell her too much. She likes this guy this week, but this kind of guy that week. Don't do things for her, make her do things for you.
THIS is what we're talking about. THESE are the games we're tired of playing. Men are tired of picking and choosing what they say and do because if they say or do a little too much or just not quite enough women flake out. It's not worth the effort when you can just invest in yourself and build the kind of life you want for yourself.
Agreed. I'm not a businessman, so I'm not rich, but as I'm in a branch of academia I'm very well-respected by my peers who are authors, academics, professors, and so on. In my field, and who I have to develop and maintain good professional relationships with at a high level, I command a lot of clout. Physically, I go to the gym and I've got a great physique for my age. I dress well, I'm well groomed, I carry myself with authority and presence (I have to, professionally), I speak with authority, again, because of my profession. All this gets noticed. But I don't tolerate women's games. I'm old enough to remember dating women and havi g affairs with them and I didn't have to jump through hoops and pass endless tests to keep them going. It indicates high narcissism if a woman is bringing games to the table.
@@EE12CSVT I understand and I’m 39 and I can’t remember the last woman that I dated that didn’t play any of these games. I see what my married friends go through and some break their back to keep their wife happy but it’s so short lived and the next day it starts over. I’m also in very good shape and can attract women fairly easily but the notion of a serious relationship just fills me with this feeling of almost dread. The entire dating game is just mind numbing to me at this point
@@brianmeen2158 The last time I met a woman who didn't play games was in 2007, and she was the only one in 24 years. I see the same thing as you do among married men - all bar three under the age of 60 I know have been crushed by their wives and turned into a shell of their former selves. I keep on hearing that they have to ask her permission to go out and enjoy their hobby, meet up with friends, buy something with money they earned, and so on. Like a boy asking permission from his mother. It's pathetic.
I get plenty of attention - especially from married or taken women - but none know how to reciprocate. They think a relationshuo just means her sitting there looking pretty and being worshipped by her free servant.
Being addicted to videos games is a way to cope. So is alcohol. Playing a video game as a hobby isn’t bad in its self.
@@EE12CSVTahh yes I know what you mean especially with attractive women - they don’t expect to have to put any effort in .. I’ve even caught rather average looking women doing this and in all fairness - why would they expect to put in work when 9 out of 10(probably 99 out of 100) guys will crawl through fire to sleep with them? This is what has warped modern dating - most guys have very little if any standards and will put a lot of work in to get with any woman that shows him the least bit interest. Then you have the outright simps which I don’t even know what to say about them at this point. So yeah it’s a mess
Looking back it hurts to say that I struggle to remember any truly interesting “back and forth” conversations I’ve had with women I was attracted to.. I’m sure there were a few blips of decent convo but I don’t remember them ..
That was the book that started me on my journey! Thank you Dr. Glover!
Thank-you. That was an arresting interview with two very interesting men. Have a nice day. 🙂
The message I got was there are many paths to the end goal. All work if you apply yourself. It’s like a spiritual practice- many paths to enlightenment. 🙏
I'm so stoked that you guys got together and decided to have this talk!
I love the South Park episode where Kyle gets dumped. He got some advice to go outside her bedroom window and play Peter Gabriel. He played "Shock the Monkey"...
Great interview! I saw Dr Glover on another show last week and enjoy his positive realist views. Keep doing what you are doing Orion, great stuff and much appreciated!
So, Dr. Glover, it’s very nice that you found a considerate woman that will bring you fruit and support you. Sounds like you’re pretty lucky. Hell would freeze over before my wife would ever serve me.
The crossover I didn't know I wanted. Thank you. Nice Guy counseling saved my life.
"choose a woman that chooses you" - awesome advice
Excellent discussion. It was like watching Plato and Aristotle having a conversation.
This collaboration is great to watch. I'm currently reading his book, its helping me a lot to battle my codependency.
Thanks to both doctors
Shaking my head at 10 minutes in where he’s like, “nobody knows what women are attracted to.” I thought the men’s movement had moved past this kind of woman-flattering happy talk. Can’t we grow up and say the truth: we know what women are attracted to, and we can say it, even though it is discouraging to men and unflattering to women.?
This. We know what 80% ACTUALLY like, despite what they say. As soon as I stopped pretending, results came, it's a disservice to pretend otherwise
What are women attracted to?
Dr Glover is great but is out of touch with modern women. Take what’s useful and discard the rest is how I learn best when listening to these personalities.
What do you think he's not up to date with? @@ACruz-kq9di
Glover is actually saying that what women tell you they are attracted to is probably not what they will actually like about you. He's not saying "oh it's a great mystery what these women like". There are general things that are obvious but at the end of the day, some women will like some guys for an unknown reason and they'll tell you it's "the X factor" or something like that. That's why he says choose women that choose you. He's also saying people find the "truth" attractive but he really means people find "authenticity" attractive.
Thank You.
One crucial piece of the puzzle that hit home with me is ending things before the woman gets vindictive if desires aren't aligning. This was what happened to me, and back then I didn't have the courage to speak my entire truth, which got me heart caught in the grinder and led to a lot of confusion.
Profound insights the two of you have.
Another good statement is, a woman views her man through the lense of her attraction.
"It's the steongest motivation in the world for a guy is to want to get laid. " In multiple decades-worth of life experience, it's the desire for a woman's love and attention--not the desire to have sex her--that's the strongest motivation. I think this claim that sex/the desire to get laid being the highest level of motivation for wanting women that's so common in the Manosphere is wrong. Yes, the desire to get laid is by far, one of we men's strongest desires. But, we desire the love, affection, and companionship fron women more than the sexual part.
Tru say, as any man who has "paid for sex" only to feel violated afterwards
Interesting because in my case I don’t crave female companionship or affection - when I pursue women Im doing it for sex . Without the drive for sex I don’t think I’d pursue them at all
Most men are so terrified of being alone. Of people thinking they're alone.
Two of my VERY favorite people, this conversation is gold. Will bookmark it and relisten ❤
"outcome independence" is liberation. Plus: do hard things. Voluntarily. Doesn't matter gym, or ice baths, or becoming a black belt, or whatever. Do the work, challenge yourself, forge yourself independently of a goal of anything but your own quality of life.
Fantastic conversation. I appreciate this thoughtful influence in the men's development space.
Love it! What a great interview. Some of my close friends are NMMG coaches. It was great to listen to Dr Glover himself 😄
Ps: damn, Orion. I’m sorry you went through that horrible stuff. Indeed hell hath no fury like a woman scorned 😢😣
What a great interview. I really enjoyed his book, No More Mr. Nice Guy.
Dr. Glover's book was a *huge* step in my RED PILL journey - this was in the ~2004 timeframe.. outstanding work, gentlemen !
Glover dosent teach any red pill bulls**t. That you have get it wrong
The taxi cab analogy is spot on. It doesn't matter how much you do for her (a "boil the ocean" project), the moment you want something in return she starts sleeping on the couch and contacts a divorce attorney.
But the problem is on us men to enter such dynamic in the first place. So we cannot blame women for that because she is (rightfully so) doing what's best.
In a relationship, the person who is doing more and more invested in a dynamic (especially emotionally) is in a submissive position, while the one who is doing less and less invested is in a leading position. The former is the follower and the latter is the leader of that relationship.
So what you're doing for her is nothing but a compensation for:
1. Her lack of interest in you
2. Your insecurities
From my experience and observations, both women and men want a man to be the leader of the relationship and women to be in submissive position.
You describe pretty much all single women, and a big chunk of married ones. The last time I met a woman who reciprocated selflessly was in 2007, and she was the only one in some 24 years. I meet plenty of women, but it becomes apparent very early on that hell will freeze over before they reciprocate or don't expect to be treated as a princess and you her simp servant. The concept of mutual effort and mutual sacrifice is long since over.
@@mountainkid417Heck no, women fight tooth and nail to be the dominant one, and to NEVER be submissive to the man. Outside of elderly couples, I can only think of three couples where the woman happily allows the man to lead. In every other relationship, the woman is very much the leader, and the man was long since castrated. If you meet a woman, the first thing she does is figure out how easy you will be to control so she's in control of the relationship. If she discovers the guy can't be, and that he expects she'll allow him to lead, she's off to find a guy who she'll lead.
@@EE12CSVT That might apply to modern long-term romantic relationships/marriages... but not to the sexual marketplace and the psychology of sexual desire. A woman's innate, deep-seated sexual wiring will always compel her to crave the kind of man who is capable of dominating her in bed. This is why being a woman in a female-dominant relationship who regularly cheats---with or without the knowledge/permission of her submissive husband---is the ultimate fantasy for women who want (and believe they deserve) the best of both worlds.
The extreme incarnation of this principle is the otherwise happily-married woman who openly dominates and cuckolds her husband; she gets any/all her needs met, and yet seeks (at least on occasion, or part-time basis) a man that she herself can submit to and look up to.
This desire is so deep-rooted in women from an evolutionary perspective, that even the vast majority of women with dominant personalities are not immune to it. Humans are ultimately animals, and sexual desire is the most primal, animalistic instinct that exists.
The same cannot be said for the quintessentially dominant man. If he finds and locks down a long-term relationship with a submissive woman who adores him and meets all his needs... his only possible need outside of that relationship/marriage may perhaps be occasional sex with other women.
The major difference? The dominant husband will generally never be seeking outside sexual partners that are radically different from the ideal wife he already has... it's just more sex simply for variety's sake to spice things up. For the dominant wife, she's not just seeking sex for the sake of sex. She is seeking the kind of sexual experience that her husband can never provide her (regardless of how perfect he is for her in every other possible way).
@@mountainkid417yep! I know too many men that have spoiled their gf or wife rotten and then wonder why she isn’t happy or why she just wants more…? That is a huge problem these days - most guys have little or no standards and the only way they know to keep a woman satisfied is just doing everything she wants them to do. This has created a bad situation for everyone as it not only doesn’t make the woman happy but it makes it that much harder for other guys in the dating realm.
It kills me that most guys will crawl through fire to sleep with a woman yet these same guys turn around and complain that women are entitled 🤔
Thanks Dr. T - for introducing me to this man and these invaluable ideas. More please - Excited to see how you build on it!
Dr Glover the BEST❤. The man knows
Attraction is a combination of energetic signature and pheromones, behavior, and physical attributes that vary by person.personality, intelligence, sense of humor, confidence,
What does “energetic signature” mean?
you guys are both legends.... thanks for your work and advice. I am a better man because of your teachings.
This is the 3rd time I've seen this episode started 2 yrs ago I think, now I understand it better than before, hes pretty right on ,as far as you need to start at loving or being comfortable with yourself first.
Excellent interview with one of my favorite masculinist.
This is incredible. Thank both of you!
OMG Dr. Robert is the proverbial nice guy himself! It's still all over his face. No wonder HE wrote that book.
Hi guys. As an ex offender, ex drug addict who is now a public servant in uk. I now work with rough sleepers. I’m very transparent about my past and now am always truthful. I am now very attractive to people versus my past life of lies
Great Interview..."More you Come into Yourself" section...DG wasn't getting it but I do...she likes you and wants to try to blow thru a boundry..the crazy comes out that defines her even more...nice job!
Such a great interview and great job to bring two worlds of wisdom together.
I love that you two have teamed up. No more mr. Nice guy literally changed my life on my spiritual journey losing the best girl i almost had 🥲 i follow this channel to go deeper into it but this book was the lesson i needed that taught me why i am the way i am. Thank you
Great convo! Recently found robert and i couldnt agree more with him
Would be a fun round table podcast between Sadia, Orion, and Dr. Glover.
The collab we all needed 🙏
With all due respect, Dr G needs 2 return his advice 2 the 80's. Today is another world, I'm 67 & can assure you: Your advice & perspectives R better 4 this space @ this moment N time
Times have change since the 80's yes but what hasn't and will never change is human nature. Even though women's software have been infected by feminists today, their biology is still the same.
I love Dr. Glover’s work. He’s made my life better. I found his book at a difficult and important time in my life and I’m grateful. That said he’s not 100% right on everything.
1) he clearly doesn’t understand what “red pill” really means.
2) “Be yourself” is awful advice, especially for young people. Who really knows what their “true self” really is at 20? You are a product of your genes and environment but you certainly can craft yourself into a better person and one more attractive to women. And you should! Be myself at age 20 would mean watching too much porn, eating junk food, not working out, binge drinking, and being clueless about life. That’s terrible. Fortunately I didn’t accept that as “love me as I am; love myself as I am”. Instead I realized that this person is not who I want to be. I can be a better person. I learned about the world, what women really want, how to be a better man. Then I changed.
Nowhere does Dr Glover says just be yourself and ends it there. He also states to work on yourself
I agree. I think the state of being comfortable and authentic with yourself is something that takes a lot of time and experience, and that a 20-year old should instead focus on things he can do and good habits he can develop.
It is funny, because Dr. Glover explains how young men start to believe they were not good enough and therefor hide their true personality. This is exactly what you are doing RIGHT NOW! Maybe in a decade or two you will understand him.
@@stephanieherman2861Nonsense. You don’t know me nearly enough to make such an assertion.
Thank you Dr Taraban for a enlightening and insightful discussion. i sincerely appreciate your nuanced take on the current dating market. i disagree tho that you think women are acting in good faith in my experience women no longer view relationships as coexisting between equals to raise well adjusted children and date exclusively to aquire as much resources from men before monkey branching to the next. i dont see long term dating marrage or children as a realistic posibility in the west anymore. My question is can you please have author Aaron Clarey on your channel for a long form interview on this same topic? He's written extensively on this topic and i think would be very educational thank you for all you do.
Great guest brother. Nice raspy voice today too
This podcast ended way too soon! I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. It was interesting to hear both your takes on how to level up as a man and attracting women.
Edit: I'd love for you to also bring Mark Manson on.
Im Mexican and I love what he said. 😂 I love this episode, very informative! 🙌🏼
shows like this are an interesting departure from the norm, because the aspect of "iron sharpening iron" puts a finer edge on the points being made. Keep up the good work, guys!
It was really great interview
It’s a great idea 😄 👍
He's so full of you know what, but it is motivational
Thank you! What an amazing conversation!!!
Best book I've ever read no more Mr nice guy. I've read countless books and did many self development courses but nothing hit home like the Mr nice guy syndrome. I was extreme nice guy and it ruined my life. Thank you Dr g
Only one negative comment in this interview is the emphasis on sex. Healthy sex with your wife or gf is essential but getting loads of women to sleep with you will cause alot of emotional issues as it did for me. I slept with alot of girls in my younger years and I honestly think it affects your relationships
Great work brothers.
This is an excellent interview - so much truth and insight. Much better than the videos on how to get the woman - that only works for hook-ups but this interview shows us men how to get the RIGHT girl to build a long term relationship with. Ultimately that will leave us much more satisfied than jumping from one fling to another.
It works for hookups? Where can i find these guides?
One Love!
Always forward, never ever backward!!
☀☀☀
💚💛❤
🙏🏿🙏🙏🏼
Read this book last year. 39 and ten years into this partnership, barely figuring this all out. Better late than never
Grest conversation. I realized that voice is Orion's after 30 mins.
Personally I like it when a Man speaks about His vulnerabilities .
Being open . I don’t like it when a Man is trying to impress Me .
When I can hear He is selling himself by concealing His true self .
When a Guy is open I feel comfortable to be myself .
It encourages Me to be more open .
OMG, this is pure gold and - for the first time after years spent on this damn YT: truth.
4:32 I’ve heard that verse also translated as “love your neighbor, who is flawed like yourself”.
As in, apply the same moral standards towards both your neighbor and yourself: have compassion for sins of weakness; and with discernment, righteously rebuke sins of malice.
44:00 example: if you mention you have to go buy some new clothes and ask the girl your dating/friends with if she'd mind coming along and giving her opinion theyre not only helping to tell you what you look attractive in, but if you then show grattitude and appreciation it becomes a positive bonding experience that can help the relationship along because willingly helping and doing good things for others actually brings them happiness too.
in a crude way its kinda like how patting your dog might feel great for the dog, but you also have that positive experience from it as the one doing the patting.
Excellent! One of your most insightful talks!
Dr. Orion got that T pain auto tune on his voice🤣
Thought we wouldn’t notice 😂
What is that? T-Pain auto voice.
Slow deep breaths, it is good to consider things. Also my favorite bumper sticker is , "Don't believe every thing you think" so in this case, i understand the point , of you have to love yourself rather than seeking it with another okay. However, i had 6 years with my Vietnamese GF,, and she died of Cancer. I like myself quite a bit, i do a better job of checking my own bullshit at the door, than most as your recent video was about , How ever,, The Tam &gg show, was what the World is looking for, so i understand Dr Glover's rap including no one who is suppose to love me loved me the way i needed, or some paraphrase and well, Tam and i had it and we did not need to say it , nor make a big deal out of it, we could just go drive down the Ocean, or walk in the woods by Moss beach, or stay home , it was clearly the charmed time. I live now well better than most but , that was the Charmed time, just to say, some of your bullshit, is
This man is EXCELLENT!!!
The arousal study that Dr. Glover covered was parsed out in depth by Dr. Daniel Bergner in his book "what women want". The interview Dr. Bergner took with Alan Roger Currie was incredible! Dr. Taraban, are you familiar with Alan Roger Curries work? Theres a massive overlap between his work and Dr. Glovers. In fact both have spoke at 21
Fantastic episode! Nice guys finish last indeed.
I heard of the book already, but my first time hearing this guy speak, he’s Johnny on the MFing spot!!🎯
Great conversation!
I filed bankruptcy after my second marriage I was broke. Man that's all I needed to hear!
THIS IS AMAZING THANK YOU
These intvws of others and of you by other folks are a smart move. Looks like it's having an effect!
Not into long podcasts but this really helped me look into the bigger picture
Recently read this book! Podcast is top 🎉🎉🎉
Love is fleeting when it comes from a woman. When you have to play these roles and jump through hoops then the love is not unconditional. Yeah you cant let yourself go obviously but I find men to be more unconditionally loving to their spouse.
xx.s are by evo.psych nature incapable of 'love' as well as 'empathy' either. beyond mere opportunistically conditional attachment as for 1st, and (pot. narcissistically) solipsistic self-made projections in 2nd regard. beyond, hypergamy won't care, and briffault's law is enacted...
38:35 I'd assume the more of afore, the less of space or even need for an xx will be vacant. as dr. t had it elsewhere: gents try to mititigate cost | loss in view of rel.ships, xx.s contemplate highest possible gains. (both in cost | benefit analyses).
Man fall in love not women.