Thank you so so much for all your birthday wishes, support and for those who have supported me through the 'Super Thanks' donations!! I truly appreciate your love and kindness. I was hoping to reply to all your lovely comments. But after an hour of replying to as many comments as I could, I realised I wouldn't be able to have the time to reply to everyone. I'm really sorry if I've missed you out 🥰 Thank you also for sharing your stories and experiences, I know how hard this journey can be. Wishing you love and strength on your healing journey. Wishing you all a restful and blessed Sunday ❤❤❤
Happy belated birthday..I'm 57 and new to your channel. As an atheist I find it impossible to think of my life being driven by any form of divinity. I do however instead of believing in a god or miraculous energy of some kind. I believe in good. And even in trials and tribulations I was able to find peace and solace. A simple paragraph I read many years ago, written by an evolutionary biologist gave me a different perspective about my existence in this life, and the lives of all those around me. Every new day that you have should be treasured more so than the last. The paragraph I spoke of saved me most in times of loss. I lost my entire family in a short 5 year span. Father, mother, grandmother I had taken care of for over 20 years, then my son. Yet I manage to face this world each day alone. That paragraph is what saved me. It reads as follows: “We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Arabia. Certainly those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here.We privileged few, who won the lottery of birth against all odds, how dare we whine at our inevitable return to that prior state from which the vast majority have never stirred?” by Richard Dawkins
I have a long history of attracting narcissists, lost a lot over the years, I went back and examined my childhood and understood the mechanisms behind it. When I came to my awakening and learned to see the red flags I turned my back and walked away from relationships for good.
I’m finding it hard. Similar history: once 😅awakened to this dynamic it seemed 95% of my relationships were with this type. I’m so disillusioned by life and people.
After a 30 year marriage during which I recognized that my husband was a narcissist but I was dependent on him financially had high anxiety and low self confidence I only escaped after I found out he cheated with a 24 year old. I’m getting divorced finally now at 52. I am looking for work now and that is the scariest part.
I'm so sorry that you're going through a similar experience. I know how painful and scary it is. I wish you the best of luck on finding work and starting your new life. Believe and yourself and know that you can get through this. Sending you love and strength ♥
I'm 27 and I'm starting to see women of your age bracket starting over and reinventing themselves a lot more recently. I think it's amazing! Stay positive and live for you!! Best wishes ✨🦋
I’m 70 and as the last adult child leaves the nest (I stayed for the kids sake) I’m making him sell the house and going my own way. I’m nervous but I need to discard him . I got my ring cut off and handed it back to him
I am just about to turn 53 and my life has been the same. Last week I stumbled across the most relevant meme on the internet,it said “If you are such a people pleaser, name the people who are pleased by you”. Let that sink in for a moment, then realise that no one was ever actually pleased by you giving up yourself to them 😔 Now go and please yourself and appreciate yourself for it 🥰
Normal people dont but Narcissists mots certainly ARE pleased when you give yourself up. That is why we meld with them, its like validation for unhealed co-dependents.
I’ve been through very similar. I’m currently going through a horrible marriage breakup at 60. I have cancer and my mum died a year ago (two months before my cheating husband ended our marriage. All blamed on me of course). You are not alone. We will thrive and find our true path in life. I resonated with all your words! Xx
I'm so sorry for what you're going through with your health, mum and ex. You so deserve so much more! Wishing you love and peace as you recover emotionally and with your health ♥♥
Happy Birthday!!!❤ You're not alone! Lots of us in the same boat, and all is well. We have no one to please but ourselves! God is good. Keep listening. ❤
Dearest Doris, thank you so much for your generosity and kind, kind words. I truly appreciate you for being here on this journey with me. Wishing you love and strength on your healing journey too ♥♥♥
@ thank you so much. ❤️ We will keep on doing the deep work it takes to move forward in our lives and come out better and stronger than ever. ❤️🙌🏼✨🤗❤️❤️💫
@leonasweny1525 I hope you’re on a better path now. I’ve been able to find back to who I was before my 27 year long marriage. Wishing you much strength and healing. Hugs with love and light🫂 ❤️✨
Happy belated birthday! Thanks for sharing your story (and yes, you are MORE than worthy 💖). Living with these people is hell on earth, so it's very noble to help others who are still living in purgatory (like myself... I filed for divorce in December).
20+ years with a covert narcissist. Like you, I hadn't heard of it before. Nor did I believe I was co-dependent. I lacked confidence. I over compensated by overworking, overgiving, overdoing, etc. Proving my worth over and over. That carrot he would dangle always seemed to get further away. Behind my back he painted me ugly, lied, played victim etc. When I finally found out I left and went no contact. I didn't know what I was dealing with until I finally asked myself where my self respect was. That was the defining moment of change for me. Thank God. I found my peace again.
Happy Birthday! I’m 61 years old and life does get better with age. In my 50’s, I started realizing I wasn’t living my life for me either. I started doing what I love to do and now I’m more fulfilled than I’ve ever been. More confident, content and loving life.
I think that anger is actually a crucial part of liberation and releasing that harmful energy. The anger gave me the strength to push back and reclaim myself and rebuild my life.
Happy Birthday 🎉 When you first started posting, I wondered if that was your experience. Maybe that is because that is the lens through which I view things now. I left at 58 years, was homeless for a while, financially devastated, among other challenges. I am almost 5 years out now. Things do get better, journaling helps make sense of our feelings and what happened to us; particularly if you experienced gaslighting. Celebrate you, and your special day, you are worthy of being celebrated. Love yourself as fiercely as you once loved the narcissist. From a fellow survivor 🇬🇧
Hey. You keep putting yourself out there. I have to believe it's liberating and scary, both at the same time. You're doing great. Stay on the path going forward. Rest on the bench for a few as you need it (metaphorically speaking). When getting involved in any new relationships -friend or romantic - stay true to your inner voice for any red flags. It's great that you are documenting your journey in your journal and these videos. I wish you continued success on this journey. Peace John
RUclips THANK YOUUUUUUU!! THANK YOUUUUUU!!! Thank you for recommending this video to me. I needed to see zurvicals lije myself , and after watching this my hopes is increasing. My self esteem is growing,I know my future is way brighter than my past.
Being on the spectrum and realizing someone is narcissistic is hard. I see the good in every one, think they wouldn't be hurtful, on purpose...I've kept so many 'friends' and relationships that were bad. I'm glad the universe gave me the education I really NEEDED to confirm I wasn't going nuts. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us
His loss Shirley, any decent man out there, would feel proud to have you on their arm 😉, your a beautiful Spirit, both inside and out, better times ahead 🤞👍🏻😉🙏🏻🩵 xx
I am sure you did not mean to express it this way, but a person is not an object like a decoration to be worn. Perhaps you meant "in his life." Words are non-physical forces that direct and divert thoughts, sometimes into unintended directions with unintended consequences.
@@grepora I support this...Basically a statement is the root of the issue at hand. Women are NOT OBJECTS. We have feelings and needs that go beyond the superficiality of looks.
Happy belated birthday! Thank you for sharing your story. Covert narcissists are the worse. I;m glad you stayed strong and found your spiritual center again. Sending blessings, love and HOPE.
Just saw a comment of yours from another channel. Good stuff. Im not ready yet to expose the narcissism in my life at the moment since im still trying with him. I have 8 kids by him. Just pray the Lord brings me through it!! Subscribed! ❤
I discovered my ex husband was coovertly abusing me when I googled "How to.communicate better with your spouse"..somehow, the first artilcle talked about emotional abuse and a whole can of warm was opened. It was rough to have discovered that. I left 3 years later (quietly) and niw 10 year later life is so much better.
@@reginapolo3357 I too googled “strange behaviour”. 8 yrs a go. What a tsunami of sudden awareness. It was rough indeed but impossible to argue with. It described the personality point for point. He died, no mention of me in the will after 20 years of cohabitation. He left our home to his niece and nephew. The final discard. Now homeless aged 60.
@sararichardson737 don't give up. It took me a couple of years to recup and recenter. Once your mental fog is gone, things will unfold in a smother way. Where are you now
What a beautiful present. Learning to love yourself and sharing who you are with the world. I'm looking forward to being inspired by your journaling process. Peace and blessings to you.💝
Thank you. I'm so happy that sharing my story is inspiring so many people. I'm planning to share more about my journaling process at some point 😃 Peace and blessings to you ♥
Happy 57th Birthday and Many Happy and Peaceful Returns! 🎂Thank your for sharing another heartfelt video. I've recently started to watch your videos and find them very inspiring. There is a lot of pressure from society to be married or in a relationships even if it might be toxic, however being true to oneself as you are is more important. Your videos are inspiring others to be their authentic self too.
Happy birthday, Shirley!🎉 I'm turning 57 myself in a couple of weeks. Just discovered and started following you. You're inspiring me to get out there as well 🤗
Cheers from Brazil 🇧🇷! I am 55 and I’ve been through the same story of a narcissist relationship. I hope to get free next year, I’m feeling sick, that’s so sad . Congratulations for your birthday and for your inspiring videos. My best wishes for your new life! Take care ! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎂🥳
Keep it quiet as you can, that’s the most dangerous time when a narcissist knows your going to leave them, many are in jail for mur der, my ex came close to ending me, destroyed my whole family, as the lord Jesus showed me, there are a lot more narcissists in the family than I realised. ✝️🙏🏽💞
I can relate so much! I was married to a narc dentist until I was 45. It's been a poor road raising my kid alone but better than living with someone living a double life. Bless you for being so vulnerable!
God bless you lovely lady. I too at the age of 57 realized I was in a romantic relationship with a covert narcissist. What a nightmare. After years of healing and understanding how and why this all happened I realized my codependency attracted this demon. As horrible as this was I can see the silver lining. Anyway, I get this deeply. Thank you friend! 🙏
You give me courage to go out and seize the day. I find relatives can be painfully toxic, and Im best removed from them. If the other choice is peaceful solitude in quiet reflection, the choice is easy.
Omg I seen your other video no wonder you felt like you couldn’t be yourself I’m 2 years out of a nine year toxic relationship with a narcissist!! Keep THRIVING BEAUTIFUL ❤
Good for you darling, from America. I've dealt with a covert narcissist. Actually, I've known her my whole life, she's, my sister. Growing up I never really felt loved by her. You Tube also taught me about covert narcissism. Now that I'm older and had to deal with her at the death of our mother, the battle was real. I put the pieces together that this is what I've been dealing with, with her. Even tho I had to deal with her to put mother to rest, it's been hard to shake the memories. I had to realize that she has a problem and forgive her and get on with my life. I hope you continue to grow strong and believe in yourself! You're doing a wonderful job. You have a sweet spirit that many don't have and that may make you an easy target. You are the wiser now!!! Keep being sweet but resist the nonsense of these ppl! God bless you.
My Sister is that much of a Narcissist that she won’t even tell me if our Mother dies, or Father for that matter, they’re all narcissists. Narcissists are demons you know. Danish Bashir channel has a video of the 7 different demons inside narcissists, he’s not the only source I’ve heard it from, firsthand I know it from experience of living with a sociopath / Covert Narcissist 14 years. They are pathological liars. The devil is the master of lies. ✝️🙏🏽❤️
Happy birthday birthday! 🎉 I love my husband after 12 years. He was a kind person to the rest of the world outwardly, for example, used to compliment me to my family and friends, but I know that that was about him. It was about him looking like a nice guy. When I left, I knew that I was going to have a nervous break down front of my children. That’s the reason I left. That emotion abuse was so subtle. I’m proud of you! ❤
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through. I know how you feel, as outwardly they present such a perfect personality. But behind closed doors, we know what they're really like. I wish you peace and love as you go through your healing. Thank you for your birthday wish ♥♥
My ex was passive-aggressive, domineering, and contemptuous. I don’t know if that makes him officially a narcissist, but I know the effect it had on me. The worst part was how he tried to deny me any input on raising our child and put me down in front of her. I’m so glad I made the courageous decision to leave him, even though I had to sacrifice some access to our child and my financial security. But I love her, and she loves me. There’s still a bond. And I don’t have to deal with constant subtle put-downs, gaslighting, and manipulation, and I don’t have to wage a campaign to get his approval to have something I want. I had put him on a pedestal, but now I see his hold over me for what it was, and I’m free.
Happy Birthday girl😊 I subscribed to your channel a few days ago. Yep, I'm going through narc abuse too. It seems to be an epidemic. Sooo many people are experiencing this hell that we don't deserve. I'm with you in spirit. Thanks for your videos. Its like we are all connecting with one another through videos and comments section. I'm sending my love to you and everyone here. We are strong and united. Keep going. You are doing better than you think. Renee from Southern California, USA
It's an achievement (hard-won maybe) to see life and speak about it as you do at a relatively young age. May that journey go on for a very long time... Thank you for sharing!
I went through what you went through 8 years ago. I'm alone 90% of my time, but it helps hearing others stories like yours. I'm alone but peaceful. Something I never was back then. Thank you xx
Happy Birthday!! 🎂🎈🎉😀💗💃 Yes, save up for that camera that you want! You really deserve it!'📸❤️ It was so eye-opening once I learned about narcissism, etc, and that, in fact, wasn't brought on by me, and that I didn't deserve it! Dr. Ramani taught me so much about this subject in her wonderfully informative videos! 😊💕
Thank you for your birthday wishes and your kind words. It was actually one of Dr Ramani's videos (I think the interview with @lewishowes) that came up on my feed. I ended up watching a lot of her and other narcissist videos 😍
Happy belated birthday and thank you for sharing. I too stumbled across videos about covert narcissism maybe 3 years ago now and it was like a light bulb moment. It's an ongoing journey with many layers to try and heal that's for sure. I wish you onward continued success and peace.
55 and looking like a million dollars lady. ❤❤❤ smart and resourceful. i feel inspired. thank you for sharing your journey. God bless you edit 57???? where??? 😂😂😂❤❤ HAPPY Birthday, sending you love. Expat in Portugal❤
Blessings to you. Im getting out of a 34 yr marriage to a narcissist. It is the single toughest thing I’ve ever had to do, but I’m doing it day by day. Finally getting to know myself. Hang in there and thank you for sharing your hope. Sending my best wishes to you ❤️
Happy Birthday, i hope you enjoyed your day. I recently had my b'day alone and I was ok with that. It's good to follow your journey and know that we all have our struggles in life. Also we can have little victories when we cope with difficult situations. Narcissists are wolves in sheep's clothing. They're a very challenging type of person to deal with. They usually never change although they sometimes alter their persona to suit the situation. I try to enjoy life 🎉
Wishing you a most beautiful birthday. 💗I can relate with you in so many ways. I've been through a very similar situation and found that I've chosen a few recent birthdays to spend on my own. It's been very freeing and liberating and actually happier than times when I've celebrated in exotic locations and expensive gifts. I found that the peace and serenity celebrating on my own was an extra special and profound personal gift.
I hope you had a great birthday!! Yes u are at peace. I was married to my ex narc for 25.5 years. I didn’t know nothing about narcissism. I learned about it in my last 8 months of marriage. I stumbled across it due to my research on my husband doing porn for 42 years. I’ve learned he is a covert narcissist. They are the worst ones! I struggled being alone helping him with mental illness and anxiety I’ve learned along the way he suffered from due to the porn and being a JW growing up. It’s been a struggle. I am so glad I moved on and divorced him. No one deserves to put treated that way. It’s so sad. I’m am healing and moving on with life. Happily divorced since August 2024.
Thank you for your kind words, I'm really glad to be with you as you go through a difficult time. Much love to you too and wishing you strength as you go through your difficult journey ♥
You're doing well! Congratulations! Finding 3 things to be grateful for or to, daily has helped me a lot. All the many Narc or not Narc videos on Youtune has truly helped as your video will help and inspire many. Happy Belated Birthday xxx We are ALL worthy, let no one tell us different
I can relate to almost every word you said. I, too, didn't know what a narcissist was until I started to leave him and finally opened up to other people. They were using that word a lot so I Googled it. I could check off each description of a narcissist that my ex was doing. It's so hard to rebuild yourself even years later. My heart goes out to you. Stay strong!
I have CPTSD from 50 year's gaslighting & reactive abuse, I am trying to find a trauma-informed therapist for EMDR therapy, they are hard to find, these RUclips videos by narc abuse survivors are a godsend. My heart goes out to you & I resonate with your sense of betrayal & disappointment but we can get back on our feet & rebuild our lives, your 55th 🎂 may seem lonely & sad but it is happy without a covert monster abusing & f--king with your mind, I wish you many more happy birthdays top come with your new found freedom
I am so sorry to hear of your experience. Just a lead for you: Doing Family Right does online therapy. One therapist with the initials of C. T. Is trained in trauma and does EMDR. Just go to the website and look at the list of therapists. All the best.
Hi Beautiful lady!🤗😘❤️💜❤️ Putting yourself first is the best birthday present you can give to yourself! 👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌 Well Done! Walk away quietly and don’t look back! You are an empath full of emotional intelligence and wisdom!! I understand completely- I’ve been used and disrespected by so many Narcissistic people! I read these words on a poster online recently - “I would rather adjust my life to your absence Than adjust my boundaries to accommodate your disrespect”! All we Need is Love, the rest will follow Keep your vibration high and live your best life! We will connect to people who value us! 🤗😘🙌🙏 Sending love and hugs from a Retired nurse from Newcastle living in Wales! The Best Is Yet to Come ❤️💜❤️🕊️🕊️🕊️🙏🌎☀️☀️☀️
Happy birthday Shirley!! You are such a strong, kind, brave person and deserve to be in a really good situation now. Thank you for sharing your experiences, i really appreciate your vulnerability.🥰❤🌺🌸🌼
I am 60 and will never date again. It just isn't worth it. Most single men after 50 are highly problematic or as the saying goes, they are "looking for a nurse with a purse".
After 12 yrs, I did too. Huge weight lifted off my shoulders, but unfortunately, I'm still stuck financially with a special needs child. I'm happy you got free, I'm working on it.
You go girl, life is going to just get Better & Better, Im 61 been there. just keep trusting in you. If your Scorpio ( sad fact we tend to attract Narcs & abusers ) but we eventually get on the right path & then theres no going back ❤ from Birmingham 🇬🇧
Your video really touched me. I also left my fiancé last June after he punched me in my face and almost broke my jaw. This ended a 14 year relationship and the engagement. I called 911 and had him arrested and left. Similarly I was recently laid off and about to turn 57 this month. It’s helpful to hear I am not alone and there is hope for a better future. Thank you for this video.
I'm so sorry to hear that you've been through a tough time. I'm glad that you took action and got yourself in a safer environment. Wishing you a better 2025 ❤
Happy Birthday! 🎉🎈🎁 You look young but wise. Your attitude and the way you carry yourself are a breath of fresh air. ‘Preciate your willingness to be vulnerable sweetheart! ❤
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!! You got this!!! I spent my first birthday post narcissist abuse alone....with a drink and cooked myself a new recipe. You're beautiful!!! And...Good for you!!! Glad you have awakened and thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you for your birthday wish and your support. Well done on getting away and loving yourself post narc abuse, I know how tough those early days are. Wishing you the very best for your healing journey ♥
I wish you well❤ I am 70 years old and I left my narcissistic husband after 47 years of marriage. This happened 5 months ago. I don’t remember living ever in peace like now. Life can be beautiful again🥰
Oh wow, that is a long time to put up with so much! How did you cope? Well done on finding strength to leave. I know what you mean about having peace from the years of unhappiness. I wish you the very best in your new life ♥
I get understanding by listening to others experiences of the same things I cannot usually describe clearly. I like your nature of being and hope the best for you.
Congratulations on taking your power back and now you can be the beautiful, strong, kind person God made you to be! Enjoy indulging yourself now 😊 the peace of mind is wonderful!
Thank you so so much for all your birthday wishes, support and for those who have supported me through the 'Super Thanks' donations!! I truly appreciate your love and kindness.
I was hoping to reply to all your lovely comments. But after an hour of replying to as many comments as I could, I realised I wouldn't be able to have the time to reply to everyone. I'm really sorry if I've missed you out 🥰
Thank you also for sharing your stories and experiences, I know how hard this journey can be. Wishing you love and strength on your healing journey.
Wishing you all a restful and blessed Sunday ❤❤❤
Happy belated birthday..I'm 57 and new to your channel.
As an atheist I find it impossible to think of my life being driven by any form of divinity. I do however instead of believing in a god or miraculous energy of some kind. I believe in good. And even in trials and tribulations I was able to find peace and solace. A simple paragraph I read many years ago, written by an evolutionary biologist gave me a different perspective about my existence in this life, and the lives of all those around me. Every new day that you have should be treasured more so than the last.
The paragraph I spoke of saved me most in times of loss. I lost my entire family in a short 5 year span. Father, mother, grandmother I had taken care of for over 20 years, then my son. Yet I manage to face this world each day alone. That paragraph is what saved me. It reads as follows:
“We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Arabia. Certainly those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here.We privileged few, who won the lottery of birth against all odds, how dare we whine at our inevitable return to that prior state from which the vast majority have never stirred?” by Richard Dawkins
how long were you married for ?
Happy Belated Birthday. Thanks for sharing your journey, many people need this.
I have a long history of attracting narcissists, lost a lot over the years, I went back and examined my childhood and understood the mechanisms behind it. When I came to my awakening and learned to see the red flags I turned my back and walked away from relationships for good.
I’m finding it hard. Similar history: once 😅awakened to this dynamic it seemed 95% of my relationships were with this type. I’m so disillusioned by life and people.
i feel like i have a similar story in terms of how i grew up it prepped me for the narcs. i think they can pick you out easily until you work it out
Disalusioned by life and people...that's me now...
After a 30 year marriage during which I recognized that my husband was a narcissist but I was dependent on him financially had high anxiety and low self confidence I only escaped after I found out he cheated with a 24 year old. I’m getting divorced finally now at 52. I am looking for work now and that is the scariest part.
I'm so sorry that you're going through a similar experience. I know how painful and scary it is. I wish you the best of luck on finding work and starting your new life. Believe and yourself and know that you can get through this. Sending you love and strength ♥
@@katrina4013 you are stronger than you think. You are worthy of a good and happy life. You will get there. The universe has your back. Always. ❤️✨💫
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Katrina, you will blossom. x
Blessings to you on this journey.
Hb. I am 57 as well, and have discovered peace in my aloneness
I totally get where you're coming from and I so love my peace too 🥰
Me too❤❤❤❤❤
I'm 27 and I'm starting to see women of your age bracket starting over and reinventing themselves a lot more recently. I think it's amazing! Stay positive and live for you!! Best wishes ✨🦋
I’m 70 and as the last adult child leaves the nest (I stayed for the kids sake) I’m making him sell the house and going my own way.
I’m nervous but I need to discard him .
I got my ring cut off and handed it back to him
You too will be that age before you know it
@leonasweny1525 well done❤️
@@sinceresong9907Let the girl enjoy her years of youth. We didn't know ourselves how quickly life flies. Peace.
@leonasweny1525 Bless you Leona. You've Got this. Sending Love and Strength your way. As you'll find out in your Journey. Peace is Priceless. ❤
I am just about to turn 53 and my life has been the same. Last week I stumbled across the most relevant meme on the internet,it said “If you are such a people pleaser, name the people who are pleased by you”. Let that sink in for a moment, then realise that no one was ever actually pleased by you giving up yourself to them 😔 Now go and please yourself and appreciate yourself for it 🥰
Normal people dont but Narcissists mots certainly ARE pleased when you give yourself up. That is why we meld with them, its like validation for unhealed co-dependents.
Thank you for this. It really is something to think about 🥰
I’ve been through very similar. I’m currently going through a horrible marriage breakup at 60. I have cancer and my mum died a year ago (two months before my cheating husband ended our marriage. All blamed on me of course).
You are not alone. We will thrive and find our true path in life. I resonated with all your words! Xx
I'm so sorry for what you're going through with your health, mum and ex. You so deserve so much more! Wishing you love and peace as you recover emotionally and with your health ♥♥
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
@@SoulCareOver50 thank you beautiful soul xxx
Sorry you're going through this.
@ thank you 🙏
Yes Gurl! I was married to a covert narcissist for 25 years, I didn't know....after I realized...I got a divorce and I'm a survivor of ME❤ .
Happy Birthday!!!❤ You're not alone! Lots of us in the same boat, and all is well. We have no one to please but ourselves! God is good. Keep listening. ❤
Happy 57th birthday Shirley! ❤🎉✨💫
Dearest Doris, thank you so much for your generosity and kind, kind words. I truly appreciate you for being here on this journey with me. Wishing you love and strength on your healing journey too ♥♥♥
@ thank you so much. ❤️ We will keep on doing the deep work it takes to move forward in our lives and come out better and stronger than ever. ❤️🙌🏼✨🤗❤️❤️💫
This resonates with my experience. Learning about covert narcissism made so many things clear and helped me so much
Same here 💪🏼❤️🤗
Me too . After a loving childhood I was used abused and thrown aside.
@leonasweny1525 I hope you’re on a better path now. I’ve been able to find back to who I was before my 27 year long marriage. Wishing you much strength and healing. Hugs with love and light🫂 ❤️✨
Happy Birthday!!! I was in a very similar situation at about the same time… I’m having a cup of tea with you in my mind … be well and ENJOY 🎉
Happy belated birthday! Thanks for sharing your story (and yes, you are MORE than worthy 💖). Living with these people is hell on earth, so it's very noble to help others who are still living in purgatory (like myself... I filed for divorce in December).
Blessings to you! Happy Birthday ❤🎉😊
Thank you so much for your support and generosity! I truly appreciate your support. Many blessings to you and wishing you a peaceful Sunday! ♥♥
So happy for you to be on your healing journey. We all deserve to be loved. Happy birthday to you!
20+ years with a covert narcissist. Like you, I hadn't heard of it before. Nor did I believe I was co-dependent. I lacked confidence. I over compensated by overworking, overgiving, overdoing, etc. Proving my worth over and over. That carrot he would dangle always seemed to get further away. Behind my back he painted me ugly, lied, played victim etc. When I finally found out I left and went no contact. I didn't know what I was dealing with until I finally asked myself where my self respect was. That was the defining moment of change for me. Thank God. I found my peace again.
Omg you just described me…they are evil
Happy Birthday! I’m 61 years old and life does get better with age. In my 50’s, I started realizing I wasn’t living my life for me either. I started doing what I love to do and now I’m more fulfilled than I’ve ever been. More confident, content and loving life.
I think that anger is actually a crucial part of liberation and releasing that harmful energy. The anger gave me the strength to push back and reclaim myself and rebuild my life.
Happy birthday. 🎉
Your authenticity and courage to share is a blessing.
Thank you.
Cake!! 🎂😀 Good video and you come across as totally authentic. Lovely. Thank you.
Thank you so much for your support and generosity! I truly appreciate you for being here and for your kindness. Many blessings to you ♥♥
Happy Birthday 🎉
When you first started posting, I wondered if that was your experience. Maybe that is because that is the lens through which I view things now. I left at 58 years, was homeless for a while, financially devastated, among other challenges. I am almost 5 years out now. Things do get better, journaling helps make sense of our feelings and what happened to us; particularly if you experienced gaslighting.
Celebrate you, and your special day, you are worthy of being celebrated. Love yourself as fiercely as you once loved the narcissist. From a fellow survivor 🇬🇧
Happy Birthday ❤ thank you for sharing your experiences...It helps me. ❤
Hey. You keep putting yourself out there. I have to believe it's liberating and scary, both at the same time.
You're doing great. Stay on the path going forward. Rest on the bench for a few as you need it (metaphorically speaking).
When getting involved in any new relationships -friend or romantic - stay true to your inner voice for any red flags. It's great that you are documenting your journey in your journal and these videos.
I wish you continued success on this journey.
Peace
John
❤ " rest on the bench for a few"
RUclips THANK YOUUUUUUU!! THANK YOUUUUUU!!! Thank you for recommending this video to me. I needed to see zurvicals lije myself , and after watching this my hopes is increasing. My self esteem is growing,I know my future is way brighter than my past.
Thanks
Being on the spectrum and realizing someone is narcissistic is hard. I see the good in every one, think they wouldn't be hurtful, on purpose...I've kept so many 'friends' and relationships that were bad. I'm glad the universe gave me the education I really NEEDED to confirm I wasn't going nuts. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us
Happy belated birthday! I have a very similar story, as so many others do. You are not alone. Subscribed.
So true. 🙋🏽♀️ May we all spiritually awaken and stay free 💝
His loss Shirley, any decent man out there, would feel proud to have you on their arm 😉, your a beautiful Spirit, both inside and out, better times ahead 🤞👍🏻😉🙏🏻🩵 xx
I am sure you did not mean to express it this way, but a person is not an object like a decoration to be worn. Perhaps you meant "in his life." Words are non-physical forces that direct and divert thoughts, sometimes into unintended directions with unintended consequences.
@@grepora I support this...Basically a statement is the root of the issue at hand. Women are NOT OBJECTS. We have feelings and needs that go beyond the superficiality of looks.
Happy belated birthday! Thank you for sharing your story. Covert narcissists are the worse. I;m glad you stayed strong and found your spiritual center again. Sending blessings, love and HOPE.
Just saw a comment of yours from another channel. Good stuff. Im not ready yet to expose the narcissism in my life at the moment since im still trying with him. I have 8 kids by him. Just pray the Lord brings me through it!! Subscribed! ❤
I discovered my ex husband was coovertly abusing me when I googled "How to.communicate better with your spouse"..somehow, the first artilcle talked about emotional abuse and a whole can of warm was opened. It was rough to have discovered that.
I left 3 years later (quietly) and niw 10 year later life is so much better.
@@reginapolo3357 I too googled “strange behaviour”. 8 yrs a go. What a tsunami of sudden awareness. It was rough indeed but impossible to argue with. It described the personality point for point. He died, no mention of me in the will after 20 years of cohabitation. He left our home to his niece and nephew. The final discard. Now homeless aged 60.
@sararichardson737 don't give up. It took me a couple of years to recup and recenter. Once your mental fog is gone, things will unfold in a smother way.
Where are you now
What a beautiful present. Learning to love yourself and sharing who you are with the world. I'm looking forward to being inspired by your journaling process. Peace and blessings to you.💝
Thank you. I'm so happy that sharing my story is inspiring so many people. I'm planning to share more about my journaling process at some point 😃 Peace and blessings to you ♥
Happy 57th Birthday and Many Happy and Peaceful Returns! 🎂Thank your for sharing another heartfelt video. I've recently started to watch your videos and find them very inspiring. There is a lot of pressure from society to be married or in a relationships even if it might be toxic, however being true to oneself as you are is more important. Your videos are inspiring others to be their authentic self too.
Happy birthday, Shirley!🎉 I'm turning 57 myself in a couple of weeks. Just discovered and started following you. You're inspiring me to get out there as well 🤗
Cheers from Brazil 🇧🇷! I am 55 and I’ve been through the same story of a narcissist relationship. I hope to get free next year, I’m feeling sick, that’s so sad . Congratulations for your birthday and for your inspiring videos. My best wishes for your new life! Take care ! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎂🥳
Keep it quiet as you can, that’s the most dangerous time when a narcissist knows your going to leave them, many are in jail for mur der, my ex came close to ending me, destroyed my whole family, as the lord Jesus showed me, there are a lot more narcissists in the family than I realised. ✝️🙏🏽💞
I can relate so much! I was married to a narc dentist until I was 45. It's been a poor road raising my kid alone but better than living with someone living a double life. Bless you for being so vulnerable!
Stay strong and love yourself and be at peace. ❤❤❤❤❤
Find strength in Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, peace that surpasses all human understanding 👑✝️🙏🏽💞
God bless you lovely lady. I too at the age of 57 realized I was in a romantic relationship with a covert narcissist. What a nightmare. After years of healing and understanding how and why this all happened I realized my codependency attracted this demon. As horrible as this was I can see the silver lining. Anyway, I get this deeply. Thank you friend! 🙏
Happiest Birthday wishes!
You give me courage to go out and seize the day. I find relatives can be painfully toxic, and Im best removed from them. If the other choice is peaceful solitude in quiet reflection, the choice is easy.
Omg I seen your other video no wonder you felt like you couldn’t be yourself I’m 2 years out of a nine year toxic relationship with a narcissist!! Keep THRIVING BEAUTIFUL ❤
Gosh nine years?!! Well done for getting away! It must have been tough? Sending you strength and the biggest hugs for your healing 💕
Happy birthday Shirley!!🥰🎉🎊
Thank you for these videos and God bless you!!🙏😊❤️🕊️
Good for you darling, from America. I've dealt with a covert narcissist. Actually, I've known her my whole life, she's, my sister. Growing up I never really felt loved by her. You Tube also taught me about covert narcissism. Now that I'm older and had to deal with her at the death of our mother, the battle was real. I put the pieces together that this is what I've been dealing with, with her. Even tho I had to deal with her to put mother to rest, it's been hard to shake the memories. I had to realize that she has a problem and forgive her and get on with my life. I hope you continue to grow strong and believe in yourself! You're doing a wonderful job. You have a sweet spirit that many don't have and that may make you an easy target. You are the wiser now!!! Keep being sweet but resist the nonsense of these ppl! God bless you.
My Sister is that much of a Narcissist that she won’t even tell me if our Mother dies, or Father for that matter, they’re all narcissists. Narcissists are demons you know. Danish Bashir channel has a video of the 7 different demons inside narcissists, he’s not the only source I’ve heard it from, firsthand I know it from experience of living with a sociopath / Covert Narcissist 14 years. They are pathological liars. The devil is the master of lies. ✝️🙏🏽❤️
Happy birthday birthday! 🎉 I love my husband after 12 years. He was a kind person to the rest of the world outwardly, for example, used to compliment me to my family and friends, but I know that that was about him. It was about him looking like a nice guy. When I left, I knew that I was going to have a nervous break down front of my children. That’s the reason I left. That emotion abuse was so subtle. I’m proud of you! ❤
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through. I know how you feel, as outwardly they present such a perfect personality. But behind closed doors, we know what they're really like. I wish you peace and love as you go through your healing. Thank you for your birthday wish ♥♥
My birthday is also in November. Happy birthday to you, I wish you all the best and thank you for sharing your journey so honestly.
My ex was passive-aggressive, domineering, and contemptuous. I don’t know if that makes him officially a narcissist, but I know the effect it had on me.
The worst part was how he tried to deny me any input on raising our child and put me down in front of her. I’m so glad I made the courageous decision to leave him, even though I had to sacrifice some access to our child and my financial security. But I love her, and she loves me. There’s still a bond. And I don’t have to deal with constant subtle put-downs, gaslighting, and manipulation, and I don’t have to wage a campaign to get his approval to have something I want. I had put him on a pedestal, but now I see his hold over me for what it was, and I’m free.
Happy birthday beautiful sis.
We love you here in South Africa
Happy Birthday girl😊 I subscribed to your channel a few days ago. Yep, I'm going through narc abuse too. It seems to be an epidemic. Sooo many people are experiencing this hell that we don't deserve. I'm with you in spirit. Thanks for your videos. Its like we are all connecting with one another through videos and comments section. I'm sending my love to you and everyone here. We are strong and united. Keep going. You are doing better than you think. Renee from Southern California, USA
You are beautiful and thank you for sharing your journey with us. ❤
I just wanted to thank you for sharing your experiences with us. Also, I hope you had a wonderful birthday! Regards, JA from Miami, Florida
It's an achievement (hard-won maybe) to see life and speak about it as you do at a relatively young age. May that journey go on for a very long time... Thank you for sharing!
Happy birthday! You are certainly not alone today❤
Thank you so much for starting this channel and sharing your experience!!!!
I went through what you went through 8 years ago. I'm alone 90% of my time, but it helps hearing others stories like yours. I'm alone but peaceful. Something I never was back then. Thank you xx
Happy Birthday!! 🎂🎈🎉😀💗💃
Yes, save up for that camera that you want! You really deserve it!'📸❤️
It was so eye-opening once I learned about narcissism, etc, and that, in fact, wasn't brought on by me, and that I didn't deserve it!
Dr. Ramani taught me so much about this subject in her wonderfully informative videos! 😊💕
Thank you for your birthday wishes and your kind words. It was actually one of Dr Ramani's videos (I think the interview with @lewishowes) that came up on my feed. I ended up watching a lot of her and other narcissist videos 😍
The universe woke you up ...evil does exist
Happy belated birthday and thank you for sharing. I too stumbled across videos about covert narcissism maybe 3 years ago now and it was like a light bulb moment. It's an ongoing journey with many layers to try and heal that's for sure. I wish you onward continued success and peace.
Happy birthday! Your bravery is amazing!❤
Happy birthday! I hope the next year will bring you more healing and peace.
Wishing you a happy birthday and a peaceful time ahead 🎉💐
55 and looking like a million dollars lady. ❤❤❤
smart and resourceful. i feel inspired. thank you for sharing your journey. God bless you
edit 57???? where??? 😂😂😂❤❤ HAPPY Birthday, sending you love. Expat in Portugal❤
Blessings to you. Im getting out of a 34 yr marriage to a narcissist. It is the single toughest thing I’ve ever had to do, but I’m doing it day by day. Finally getting to know myself. Hang in there and thank you for sharing your hope. Sending my best wishes to you ❤️
....btw, you look fantastic for 57 !!! Whatever you're doing for yourself, KEEP DOING IT.
Happy Birthday, i hope you enjoyed your day. I recently had my b'day alone and I was ok with that. It's good to follow your journey and know that we all have our struggles in life. Also we can have little victories when we cope with difficult situations. Narcissists are wolves in sheep's clothing. They're a very challenging type of person to deal with. They usually never change although they sometimes alter their persona to suit the situation. I try to enjoy life 🎉
It’s my birthday today and I’ll be spending it alone. I really needed this video thanks for sharing ❤
Wishing you the best birthday! I hope you have a wonderful day 🎉💕
I think you're a beautiful person. Happy birthday! Stay strong
Wishing you a most beautiful birthday. 💗I can relate with you in so many ways. I've been through a very similar situation and found that I've chosen a few recent birthdays to spend on my own. It's been very freeing and liberating and actually happier than times when I've celebrated in exotic locations and expensive gifts. I found that the peace and serenity celebrating on my own was an extra special and profound personal gift.
I hope you had a great birthday!! Yes u are at peace.
I was married to my ex narc for 25.5 years. I didn’t know nothing about narcissism. I learned about it in my last 8 months of marriage. I stumbled across it due to my research on my husband doing porn for 42 years. I’ve learned he is a covert narcissist. They are the worst ones! I struggled being alone helping him with mental illness and anxiety I’ve learned along the way he suffered from due to the porn and being a JW growing up. It’s been a struggle. I am so glad I moved on and divorced him. No one deserves to put treated that way. It’s so sad. I’m am healing and moving on with life. Happily divorced since August 2024.
Wishing you a blessed and beautiful birthday
Thank you for your kind words, I'm really glad to be with you as you go through a difficult time. Much love to you too and wishing you strength as you go through your difficult journey ♥
Happy birthday ❤
You're doing well! Congratulations! Finding 3 things to be grateful for or to, daily has helped me a lot. All the many Narc or not Narc videos on Youtune has truly helped as your video will help and inspire many. Happy Belated Birthday xxx We are ALL worthy, let no one tell us different
I can relate to almost every word you said. I, too, didn't know what a narcissist was until I started to leave him and finally opened up to other people. They were using that word a lot so I Googled it. I could check off each description of a narcissist that my ex was doing. It's so hard to rebuild yourself even years later. My heart goes out to you. Stay strong!
I have CPTSD from 50 year's gaslighting & reactive abuse, I am trying to find a trauma-informed therapist for EMDR therapy, they are hard to find, these RUclips videos by narc abuse survivors are a godsend. My heart goes out to you & I resonate with your sense of betrayal & disappointment but we can get back on our feet & rebuild our lives, your 55th 🎂 may seem lonely & sad but it is happy without a covert monster abusing & f--king with your mind, I wish you many more happy birthdays top come with your new found freedom
I am so sorry to hear of your experience. Just a lead for you: Doing Family Right does online therapy. One therapist with the initials of C. T. Is trained in trauma and does EMDR. Just go to the website and look at the list of therapists. All the best.
Hi Beautiful lady!🤗😘❤️💜❤️
Putting yourself first is the best birthday present you can give to yourself! 👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌
Well Done!
Walk away quietly and don’t look back!
You are an empath full of emotional intelligence and wisdom!!
I understand completely- I’ve been used and disrespected by so many Narcissistic people!
I read these words on a poster online recently -
“I would rather adjust my life to your absence
Than adjust my boundaries to accommodate your disrespect”!
All we Need is Love, the rest will follow
Keep your vibration high
and live your best life!
We will connect to people who value us! 🤗😘🙌🙏
Sending love and hugs from a Retired nurse from Newcastle living in Wales!
The Best Is Yet to Come ❤️💜❤️🕊️🕊️🕊️🙏🌎☀️☀️☀️
Happy Birthday Youthful lady. Your soul is genuine.
Thank you for your kind words 😊
Thank you so much for being a light in the darkness ❤
I love your channel and thank you for sharing your story. I'm in the US. HAPPY BIRTHDAY🎂🎂
Happy Birthday!!💝✨
Happy birthday 🎉🎉🎉❤
And congratulations on growing and transforming from the pain.
Happy birthday and all the best!!! I've been following you for quite sometime now and I really wish your channel becomes a huge success! 😊❤
Thank you for everything you've shared - it's helpful to me. And a belated happy birthday ❤
You're very welcome, I'm really happy that my videos help you. Thank you for your birthday wishes 😍
Happy birthday Shirley!! You are such a strong, kind, brave person and deserve to be in a really good situation now. Thank you for sharing your experiences, i really appreciate your vulnerability.🥰❤🌺🌸🌼
Happy Birthday!
Wow! Congrats, bro! And happy belated birthday 🎉
I am 60 and will never date again. It just isn't worth it.
Most single men after 50 are highly problematic or as the saying goes,
they are "looking for a nurse with a purse".
Just saying the same to my mate, we're your age group 61 & 63. Havnt got the energy, to busy loving & doing me ❤
After 12 yrs, I did too. Huge weight lifted off my shoulders, but unfortunately, I'm still stuck financially with a special needs child. I'm happy you got free, I'm working on it.
I'm nearly 35 and I realised my mother is a covert narcissist. I feel a lot of rage knowing that now but I won't let it consume me.
That's the best way to be, not let it consume you. Focus your energy on loving you instead 😍
You go girl, life is going to just get Better & Better, Im 61 been there. just keep trusting in you. If your Scorpio ( sad fact we tend to attract Narcs & abusers ) but we eventually get on the right path & then theres no going back ❤ from Birmingham 🇬🇧
Happy belated birthday .Solitude with peace ,is a gift.
Happy Birthday 🎂and keep meditating 🙏
Your video really touched me. I also left my fiancé last June after he punched me in my face and almost broke my jaw. This ended a 14 year relationship and the engagement. I called 911 and had him arrested and left. Similarly I was recently laid off and about to turn 57 this month. It’s helpful to hear I am not alone and there is hope for a better future. Thank you for this video.
I'm so sorry to hear that you've been through a tough time. I'm glad that you took action and got yourself in a safer environment. Wishing you a better 2025 ❤
Happy birthday 🎈🎁🎂🎊🎉
Happy Birthday! Thank you for sharing your journey🌟
Happy Birthday! 🎉🎈🎁 You look young but wise. Your attitude and the way you carry yourself are a breath of fresh air. ‘Preciate your willingness to be vulnerable sweetheart! ❤
Thank you for your kind words ♥
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!! You got this!!! I spent my first birthday post narcissist abuse alone....with a drink and cooked myself a new recipe. You're beautiful!!! And...Good for you!!! Glad you have awakened and thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you for your birthday wish and your support. Well done on getting away and loving yourself post narc abuse, I know how tough those early days are. Wishing you the very best for your healing journey ♥
I wish you well❤ I am 70 years old and I left my narcissistic husband after 47 years of marriage. This happened 5 months ago. I don’t remember living ever in peace like now. Life can be beautiful again🥰
Oh wow, that is a long time to put up with so much! How did you cope? Well done on finding strength to leave. I know what you mean about having peace from the years of unhappiness. I wish you the very best in your new life ♥
@@SoulCareOver50thank you so much❤
I get understanding by listening to others experiences of the same things I cannot usually describe clearly.
I like your nature of being and hope the best for you.
Well done! 🙏🏾
Thank you ☺
Congratulations on taking your power back and now you can be the beautiful, strong, kind person God made you to be! Enjoy indulging yourself now 😊 the peace of mind is wonderful!
Thank you. Hello from NorCal. USA
Happy Birthday 🌻💐🌷🪷
"How can we not celebrate life?" 💕🍂