The First Guy To Ever Shoplift

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  • Опубликовано: 4 фев 2025

Комментарии • 3,6 тыс.

  • @RyanGeorge
    @RyanGeorge  3 года назад +2301

    Hi there hello, thanks to Morning Brew for my daily news briefings! Sign up here for free right here: bit.ly/ryangeorge

  • @tylerbrown8133
    @tylerbrown8133 3 года назад +9706

    “First person to use a metaphor” would be really funny to watch.

    • @kjoc70
      @kjoc70 3 года назад +280

      That would be as funny as a platypus orgy.

    • @tylerbrown8133
      @tylerbrown8133 3 года назад +165

      @@kjoc70 I’m not a platypus though…

    • @JS-rv3et
      @JS-rv3et 3 года назад +300

      @@kjoc70 im concerned with your browser history

    • @kjoc70
      @kjoc70 3 года назад +225

      @@tylerbrown8133 it's a metaphor, (okay, technically a simile,) but it's understandable you don't know that since the first person to use a metaphor hasn't happened yet.

    • @J0ECRAWF15H
      @J0ECRAWF15H 3 года назад +73

      or the first person to use a pun.

  • @AlsonamedDennis
    @AlsonamedDennis 3 года назад +15967

    "I decided" are the two most powerful words in the Ryan-verse.

  • @TheRealGhutts
    @TheRealGhutts 3 года назад +3548

    "Things cost money."
    "I much prefer when they don't."
    I AGREE! lol

    • @AndrooUK
      @AndrooUK 3 года назад +30

      You should just live in a communist or socialist utopia where you don't have any money to buy anything at all... 😅

    • @starter_4008
      @starter_4008 3 года назад +15

      Remove the lol it ruins it

    • @amberscoutstarwatcher
      @amberscoutstarwatcher 3 года назад +3

      I just made the amount of likes 666....👀👀👀 😂😂😂

    • @kiwipaws1626
      @kiwipaws1626 3 года назад +1

      @@starter_4008 lol

    • @bubba9384
      @bubba9384 3 года назад +1

      @Honudes Gai that is because marxism dosen't work...

  • @YourPhysicsSimulator
    @YourPhysicsSimulator 3 года назад +3940

    In the Ryanverse everything is discussed politely, where both parties show their respective opinions without interrupting the other Ryan.
    Even when discussing murder, shoplifting or hiring an assassin it is done eloquently.
    I wish our world was like the Ryanverse

    • @Chipotleadvisory
      @Chipotleadvisory 3 года назад +160

      @@Micah_7 but he did it politely giving the proper respect to the store owner’s views on the matter.

    • @YourPhysicsSimulator
      @YourPhysicsSimulator 3 года назад +146

      @@Micah_7 Hey, but at least he'll give the Jurassic Park VHS back

    • @YourPhysicsSimulator
      @YourPhysicsSimulator 3 года назад +68

      @@Chipotleadvisory Exactly, no yelling or violence needed

    • @Grothgerek
      @Grothgerek 3 года назад +35

      I just noticed that the absence of everything we know, like Shoplifting, Insurances, Prison etc. isn't the most unrealistic thing in his 'The First Guy To Ever' videos...

    • @talalon4098
      @talalon4098 3 года назад +72

      Maybe the Ryanverse is just Canada.....

  • @quinzee5299
    @quinzee5299 3 года назад +985

    Ryan 1: What are you doing
    Ryan 2: Shoplifting
    Ryan 1: I don't think you're strong enough to lift a whole shop

    • @Runningpeaks
      @Runningpeaks 3 года назад +34

      I'm going to have to ask you to get off my back on this

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад +11

      @@Runningpeaks I don't even know what your back is into, and you expect me to get it off?

    • @Runningpeaks
      @Runningpeaks 3 года назад +7

      @@davidwuhrer6704 don't tell me what I can and cannot lift! In fact it's super easy

    • @J.R.__
      @J.R.__ 3 года назад +8

      @@Runningpeaks alright lemme get offa that thing!

    • @Runningpeaks
      @Runningpeaks 3 года назад +2

      @@J.R.__ great!

  • @ronyorobio7096
    @ronyorobio7096 3 года назад +376

    "Everybody has to agree to this exchange ritual or the whole concept falls appart" How the socioeconomic system survives in a phrase. It took me a whole semester of Constitution and social sciences to understand that. New generations now have Ryan!!

    • @MrNote-lz7lh
      @MrNote-lz7lh 3 года назад +14

      What? How? An elementary school student should understand that much.

    • @angrymokyuu1951
      @angrymokyuu1951 3 года назад +17

      ​@@MrNote-lz7lh It's one of those things that seems obvious when you say it, but isn't necessarily as obvious through casual observation.

    • @MrNote-lz7lh
      @MrNote-lz7lh 3 года назад +5

      @@angrymokyuu1951
      That's just sad such a basic concept is hard for people to understand. What? Do people really think stores magically stock themselves. Or that they are the only ones who work solely to earn cash so they could do and buy the things they actually want?

    • @angrymokyuu1951
      @angrymokyuu1951 3 года назад +12

      @@MrNote-lz7lh It's more that they see the pieces, but don't put them together. Everything's at-a-distance enough these days that you can miss major portions of how things work and still play your part in making that happen.
      And, sadly, there actually are people who think food comes from the store.

    • @huliniswhoiam
      @huliniswhoiam 3 года назад +13

      I feel like there's a discussion to be had just from your comment about how pointless college is..... Well not necessarily pointless but there's probably a lot of useless information thrown in there to get to the meat of what you actually need to know.

  • @PippiOnePointOh
    @PippiOnePointOh 3 года назад +2019

    Shopkeeper: “I’m gonna have to put you in a room over this.”

    • @bingbonglinglong6277
      @bingbonglinglong6277 3 года назад +28

      being put in a room is TIGHT

    • @ItsOfficiaI
      @ItsOfficiaI 3 года назад +13

      Well I was already going to go back to a room so that doesn't sound so bad.

    • @1estebanderas
      @1estebanderas 3 года назад +4

      I'm stealing this comment

    • @dooda9566
      @dooda9566 3 года назад +1

      @about you pls stop

    • @logansaxby7224
      @logansaxby7224 3 года назад +9

      Shoplifter: "But we're already in a room."

  • @johnsmith8981
    @johnsmith8981 3 года назад +1453

    I love that the guy who's fine with taking a shirt from a store won't steal his personal copy of Jurassic Park.
    Unless he's the first guy to lie...

    • @9nikola
      @9nikola 3 года назад +38

      Definitely not the first guy to lie. I doubt this Drastic Park thing would exist if nobody had ever lied before.

    • @JS-rv3et
      @JS-rv3et 3 года назад +7

      @@9nikola wait was it drastic park?

    • @natperXD
      @natperXD 3 года назад +16

      He made a video called First Guy to ever write fiction so this is probably set after that
      Video link: ruclips.net/video/708n4GCbTiM/видео.html

    • @onesixfive_165
      @onesixfive_165 3 года назад +8

      He is tho he lied about coming to pay for the shirt

    • @johnsmith8981
      @johnsmith8981 3 года назад +4

      @@natperXD maybe this guy is that guy the first guy to ever lie would probably think of just taking things they want too.

  • @johnshimwell1600
    @johnshimwell1600 3 года назад +301

    I would watch an entire film of Ryan George being every single character - just his face on a T-Rex body and all Dino bodies for Jurassic Park would be hilarious!

    • @llarmstrong783
      @llarmstrong783 3 года назад +2

      Me too

    • @bibbobella
      @bibbobella 2 года назад +10

      I would honestly find it even better if it is still just Ryan not even nessesarily in a costume but like awkwardly running towards the other Ryans while making pathetic growls and going "Im the T-rex! I didn't even live anywhere NEAR the same time period as the rest of these dinosaurs! Also, I have feathers!"

    • @goodnesswhy
      @goodnesswhy 2 года назад +9

      "Oh hey, look at me, I'm a freakin' dinosaur!"

    • @Kyoobur9000
      @Kyoobur9000 2 года назад +7

      @@goodnesswhy “Yep, I’m totally gonna eat you now, I decided.”
      “You can’t do that it’s illegal! They’ll put you in a room or something!”
      “Yeah but I can’t fit in rooms, so, like, I can do whatever I want without getting in trouble.”

    • @ZenMonkeyGod
      @ZenMonkeyGod Год назад +3

      ​@@Kyoobur9000 "Yeah, but I'm gonna need you to get ALLLLLLL the way off my back about eating me! It would severely impede my ability to do stuff!"

  • @jaycupp9497
    @jaycupp9497 3 года назад +1316

    “Things cost money”, “but I like it better when they don’t” 😂

    • @0reverend
      @0reverend 3 года назад +5

      That's the Thing that belongs to a T-shirt .)

    • @equinox2553
      @equinox2553 3 года назад +9

      ah yes, soviet union anthem intensifies, thats OUR stuff now.

    • @MichaelOKC
      @MichaelOKC 3 года назад +3

      I remember when System of a Down named their album "Steal this Album".

    • @noammosek1319
      @noammosek1319 3 года назад +8

      Sounds like an Anarcho-Communist to me

    • @vegeta4693214
      @vegeta4693214 3 года назад +7

      @@noammosek1319 Came here to say the same thing. That's how anarcho-comunism works. People just agree to make things and give them away. There is no money involved.

  • @Street_Fighter_Cody
    @Street_Fighter_Cody 3 года назад +6524

    It’s nice to see Ryan acting in movies now instead of just pitching them

    • @127mfan
      @127mfan 3 года назад +72

      Underrated comment.

    • @theunknownreturns
      @theunknownreturns 3 года назад +25

      What movie?

    • @127mfan
      @127mfan 3 года назад +27

      @@dkisausome Lol, tagged the wrong person.

    • @KyranoSaurFlex
      @KyranoSaurFlex 3 года назад +15

      I can't believe that poppy still exists 😅 somehow that's comforting to know

    • @jackvancleve7996
      @jackvancleve7996 3 года назад +26

      Who did he play in the movie I only saw an adult actor and a child actor

  • @benjaminthorpe4098
    @benjaminthorpe4098 3 года назад +1420

    Please make “First guy to make a bow and arrow.” You could be like “I kinda wanna stab him, but like from really far away.”

  • @shonk3623
    @shonk3623 3 года назад +3288

    “You can’t do that” is the most counter-arguable phrase in the Ryan-verse

    • @Egurius3
      @Egurius3 3 года назад +142

      Yeah because physically they can, they decided.

    • @thegoose4650
      @thegoose4650 3 года назад +36

      But physically I can

    • @TheeFlashbackMan
      @TheeFlashbackMan 3 года назад +40

      "but i physically can"
      is even stronger

    • @dolliesdieyes5590
      @dolliesdieyes5590 3 года назад +3

      Whats ryanverse?

    • @shonk3623
      @shonk3623 3 года назад +5

      @@dolliesdieyes5590 The universe of ryans

  • @shaunakbiswas6213
    @shaunakbiswas6213 3 года назад +780

    "Things cost money"
    "I much prefer when they don't"
    the customer is always right

    • @JoeMama-np8vi
      @JoeMama-np8vi 3 года назад

      @@BengtBagels
      It sound cool
      That's all you should know

    • @concernedcommenter8258
      @concernedcommenter8258 3 года назад +9

      Yeah but he’s not a customer he’s just…
      You know stealing.

    • @concernedcommenter8258
      @concernedcommenter8258 3 года назад +3

      @@BengtBagels You’re right english is stupid but no one wants to fix it so

    • @Supremax67
      @Supremax67 3 года назад

      Is what customer service tells customers so they stop whining like little babies.

    • @JimmyMon666
      @JimmyMon666 3 года назад

      In San Fransisco things don't cost money

  • @Geospasmic
    @Geospasmic 3 года назад +48

    Love how these videos tear the language we use apart and reveal how toothless a lot of it is.
    "You can't"
    "I just did"

  • @leskiharn9597
    @leskiharn9597 3 года назад +248

    I love that they just stop and watch the entirety of Jurassic Park just so the shoplifter guy knows what the store guy is talking about

    • @DMS-pq8
      @DMS-pq8 3 года назад +2

      @Willy on Wheels Stop it

  • @IssaalaaRacing
    @IssaalaaRacing 3 года назад +1197

    “I’m gonna head home and make a list of things I need to do and then not do them”
    Me in a nutshell

  • @LorianandLothric
    @LorianandLothric 3 года назад +16

    I like the clean, witty humor that doesn’t rely on swearing. Keep it up

    • @TheWorldsStage
      @TheWorldsStage Год назад +6

      Unlike Jurassic Park, which relies only on swearing. Good movie, though, I wish more people have heard about it

  • @kendehegedus2372
    @kendehegedus2372 3 года назад +537

    In the Ryanverse everyone is named after their job, since the First guy to ever have a name sketch. That's why Jurassic Park is directed by Steven Filmmaker. Pure genius.

    • @mrsweetkandy7673
      @mrsweetkandy7673 3 года назад +12

      Did they agree on using jobs as name? I don't remember them confirming they'd be called "unemployed"

    • @shaereub4450
      @shaereub4450 3 года назад +27

      Isn't shoplifting a job? It could pay the bills.
      Edit: the shoplifter could be named Rob

    • @JoeMama-np8vi
      @JoeMama-np8vi 3 года назад +2

      @@mrsweetkandy7673
      Yes,it all started in the first guy to have a name

    • @efraim6960
      @efraim6960 3 года назад +8

      This practice exists in real-life as well.

    • @mrsweetkandy7673
      @mrsweetkandy7673 3 года назад +2

      @@JoeMama-np8vi I know, but I don't think they've confirmed using the "job" for the last name, since they'd both be called unemployed
      though that trend seems to be there, from the lore this new video gave us

  • @devindriskill8727
    @devindriskill8727 3 года назад +2999

    “I’m gonna make a list of things I gotta do and then not do them...”
    Ryan’s throwaway jokes are my favorite thing😂😂

    • @kayjacoby290
      @kayjacoby290 3 года назад +71

      Same energy. Couple days ago, I replaced a cover on one of our dog beds.
      Husband: What are you going to do with the old cover?
      Me: I'll wash it, and put it in the other room, pretend I'm going to sew the hole in it, but never do it. Then throw it out in a couple months.
      Husband: Then why not just go ahead and throw it out now?
      Me: That's no fun.

    • @theshoe1391
      @theshoe1391 3 года назад +16

      Hey that sounds like my life

    • @aivreescend7945
      @aivreescend7945 3 года назад +9

      "Yeah i got this amazing idea!! Let's sketch them now!!"
      "Yeah now that I'm looking at it, it would be a pain in the ass to line and color"
      Next day
      "Oh great i have some great ideas! Gotta sketch them before it lost forever!"
      "Hmmm okay now- that i see it"
      "Oh another!-"
      "Welp-"
      Story of my life.

    • @devindriskill8727
      @devindriskill8727 3 года назад +3

      The life of every college student

    • @bernardmutisya7603
      @bernardmutisya7603 3 года назад +4

      throwaway jokes are tight

  • @bastelkiste2242
    @bastelkiste2242 3 года назад +23

    I love the phrase " I decided". It's hilarious but so powerful.

  • @EricJacobusOfficial
    @EricJacobusOfficial 3 года назад +1345

    Haha it's like a little ritual. So good

    • @Mr.Ekshin
      @Mr.Ekshin 3 года назад +6

      I feel like I've seen this same refusal to respect the ritual happening all across the country... wherever BLM is active.

    • @luminoustorus548
      @luminoustorus548 3 года назад +7

      The black witchcraft of bloated Mammon

    • @jamessanchezgrenien3962
      @jamessanchezgrenien3962 3 года назад +1

      Hey man really like your Real Life Tekken Videos :D

    • @EricJacobusOfficial
      @EricJacobusOfficial 3 года назад +1

      @@jamessanchezgrenien3962 thanks!

    • @minklemadness5532
      @minklemadness5532 3 года назад

      Why do these comments blow up wtf

  • @PensandoRPG
    @PensandoRPG 3 года назад +864

    Steven Filmmaker is TIGHT

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад +17

      But you have to admit that he is good at filmmaking, and also at making films. He routinely has producer guy say "Wowowow, wow" about his pitches when they are meeting.

    • @telocho
      @telocho 3 года назад +10

      In German, Spielfilm means movie. So Steven Spielfilm would be cool.

    • @thomasbender2036
      @thomasbender2036 3 года назад +5

      He is the guy who made that movie!

    • @ToyotaTacomaOfficial
      @ToyotaTacomaOfficial 3 года назад

      Who?

    • @ToyotaTacomaOfficial
      @ToyotaTacomaOfficial 3 года назад

      Oh nevermind, I just noticed.

  • @dngrouscrgo
    @dngrouscrgo 3 года назад +243

    "One thing's for sure, this park, it's SUUUUPPER Jurassic"
    >Contains multiple animals that are all actually from the Mesozoic era...

    • @lenonel3286
      @lenonel3286 3 года назад +14

      "FUUUUCK"

    • @nathanb1538
      @nathanb1538 3 года назад +28

      I hate to be that guy but seeing as I’m majoring in geology, i can’t help myself. The mesozoic is an Era that contains the Periods: Triassic, Jurassic, and Cretaceous. You are correct that most of the dinosaurs aren’t from the Jurassic though. Cretaceous park just doesn’t have the same ring to it!

    • @UnclePhil73
      @UnclePhil73 3 года назад +2

      Maybe in the Ryan-verse they did have all Jurassic era things?

    • @Simboiss
      @Simboiss 3 года назад +9

      Funny thing is, if they decided to name the movie "Cretaceous Park", no one would think it's weird, because the other title would never have existed.

    • @Gaibethebaptist
      @Gaibethebaptist 3 года назад

      😂😂

  • @arandomweeb1890
    @arandomweeb1890 3 года назад +521

    "Can you at least bring me back my Jurassic Park VHS when you’re done with it?"
    "Of course"
    Respect 100

    • @JS-rv3et
      @JS-rv3et 3 года назад +14

      the real question is will he rewind it though?

    • @cymes82
      @cymes82 3 года назад +7

      I get a feeling that this will result in the first person to illegally copy a movie.

    • @jerkycam
      @jerkycam 3 года назад

      so canadian

    • @randomguy6994
      @randomguy6994 3 года назад +2

      REP: -10
      “Of course”
      Rep: 100

    • @robertlawrence4719
      @robertlawrence4719 3 года назад

      @@AxxLAfriku but hate is cool.

  • @carsonkenton6041
    @carsonkenton6041 3 года назад +451

    Seeing Ryan swear in a Jurassic Park parody has made my day.

    • @Matt_Romans116_Morris
      @Matt_Romans116_Morris 3 года назад +2

      Same bud 😂

    • @SheetsGiggles
      @SheetsGiggles 3 года назад +14

      “Holy sh*t! Dinosaurs! What the f^ck!!” would actually be the more plausible reaction from the actors in that scenario.

    • @bobfallon2676
      @bobfallon2676 3 года назад +10

      He should start doing 4 minute movie parodies. I say that because I want to see the rest of his version of Jurassic Park now.

    • @puellamservumaddominum6180
      @puellamservumaddominum6180 3 года назад +2

      It was a parody? Are you sure?

  • @MatildaV1980
    @MatildaV1980 3 года назад +73

    ”Okay that’s a good guy, that guy’s nice, I like him.”😂😂

    • @vin.2
      @vin.2 3 года назад +1

      I READ THIS RIGHT WHEN IT PLAYED

    • @osheridan
      @osheridan 3 года назад

      @@vin.2 same

    • @Rapscallion2009
      @Rapscallion2009 2 года назад

      Ryan wasn't lying about being Canadian. :-)

  • @UJEvans
    @UJEvans 3 года назад +252

    "Until I catch my reflection in the wrong lighting."
    How do you make such relatable quotes in such a unique way?

    • @Kattywagon29
      @Kattywagon29 3 года назад +6

      I have several things in my closet that look great on hangers, but terrible on me. Every so often I look at them and try them on and then just put them back.

    • @mesutkroos2353
      @mesutkroos2353 3 года назад +2

      If you don't mind could you explain what that line means ?? Sorry man from Barbados so didn't quite catch it ??

    • @yeswanthsannidhanam
      @yeswanthsannidhanam 3 года назад +1

      Ikr

    • @GJMEGA1
      @GJMEGA1 3 года назад +2

      @@mesutkroos2353 In the wrong light clothes can look terrible on you even if they look fine at a different angle.

    • @Kattywagon29
      @Kattywagon29 3 года назад

      @lewangoalski This week I literally tried on 4 shirts that I knew look terrible on me.

  • @iTechSavvyOfficial
    @iTechSavvyOfficial 3 года назад +812

    Just appreciate for a moment, all the hard work Ryan does to keep us entertained. And we get to watch it all for free. I think that deserves a like and subscribe to him!

    • @SamDoots
      @SamDoots 3 года назад

      Ok

    • @KoopaAndTroopa
      @KoopaAndTroopa 3 года назад +11

      He makes money off of it

    • @NoodleProductions
      @NoodleProductions 3 года назад +4

      @@KoopaAndTroopa shhh if he says that then people won’t like his comment

    • @tomn6800
      @tomn6800 3 года назад +1

      We still pay for our machines we can use to watch it

    • @gamergod3378
      @gamergod3378 3 года назад +4

      Jesus christ dude hes a youtuber. Nothing revolutionary about making funny videos and putting them on the internet.

  • @lukethelegend9705
    @lukethelegend9705 2 года назад +6

    A man shoplifting and leaving with a Jurassic Park VHS, and then the shopkeeper asking if he could return the VHS, which the shoplifter agrees to do, is the most Canadian thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life.

  • @ceilinh6004
    @ceilinh6004 3 года назад +71

    "I was just going to head home, make a list of things I need to do, and then not do them."
    Welp.
    Ryan just made the shoplifter relatable.
    Genius at work.

    • @drafezard7315
      @drafezard7315 3 года назад +3

      Yeah that's the most underrated line in the Ryanverse. Can't believe more people aren't talking about it here.

    • @mwright_boomer
      @mwright_boomer 3 года назад +3

      Thus creating the perfect antihero

  • @unknown634VODS
    @unknown634VODS 3 года назад +375

    I use the phrase, "physically I can" because of this series and it drives my friends nuts

    • @sarthakrajour
      @sarthakrajour 3 года назад +1

      Haha that's smart

    • @innocentbystander3317
      @innocentbystander3317 3 года назад +8

      Hallelujah, brother! Spread the good word to the authoritarians all around the world. Let them hear and feel the power of, "No!" Feel free to also teach them the blessed gospel of "None of your business!" and the ever holy, "Fcuk off!"
      Amen.

    • @mr.silence9991
      @mr.silence9991 3 года назад

      @@innocentbystander3317 what does hallelujah mean
      E

    • @bunny_0288
      @bunny_0288 3 года назад

      @@mr.silence9991 Hallelujah's literal translation is "Praise the Lord." It's Hebrew and is written throughout the Bible. You can specifically find it a lot in Psalms if you want to read it in context. ruclips.net/video/cenQBonBdHs/видео.html

    • @dorismidge8762
      @dorismidge8762 3 года назад +3

      I use “I decided” with my students when I tell them what I want them to do. It goes over their heads (kindergarten, whatcha gonna do), but I laugh! 😉

  • @brobafett21
    @brobafett21 3 года назад +12

    We now NEED a new series of videos of Ryan inserting himself into the scenes of famous movies, I decided. Please make this happen!

  • @timothydanilyuk3156
    @timothydanilyuk3156 3 года назад +264

    When they world needed him most
    He came back with multiple clones

    • @Moncriefs
      @Moncriefs 3 года назад +5

      And a Jurassic Park VHS

    • @jcrturtle8879
      @jcrturtle8879 3 года назад +3

      Just starting avatar, I finally understand this

  • @christopherverhoef9112
    @christopherverhoef9112 3 года назад +646

    "But then I won't come back here."
    "You were taking my stuff and not giving me money for it like we agreed. You not coming back here is exactly what I want."

    • @romainsavioz5466
      @romainsavioz5466 3 года назад +31

      I called the police and they decided that they didn't like it either and they decided to put you in a small room

    • @alilweeb7684
      @alilweeb7684 3 года назад +1

      @Robert Monroe it is very easy lmao

    • @godemperorofmankind3.091
      @godemperorofmankind3.091 2 года назад

      @Robert Monroe salesman: wowowowow! wow.

  • @stillatwork
    @stillatwork 3 года назад +1

    He brought back the VHS but he didn't rewind it, truly a monster!

  • @raydunakin
    @raydunakin 3 года назад +1033

    Oh man, I was all set to buy some of that anti-gravity orange juice and then he tells me it's not available for sale!

  • @pengy5771
    @pengy5771 3 года назад +557

    The “Jurassic park” film should have ended with the main character doing a backflip snapping the bad guys neck and saving the day

    • @theimortal1974
      @theimortal1974 3 года назад +34

      even better snapping the neck of a t-rex and saving the day

    • @pratibhakandarkar5883
      @pratibhakandarkar5883 3 года назад +27

      @@theimortal1974 And then Dr. Alan 'f*king' Grant snapped the f*king brachiosaurus' neck and saved the f*king park

    • @theimortal1974
      @theimortal1974 3 года назад +18

      @@pratibhakandarkar5883 f**king life uh finds a f**king way

    • @pratibhakandarkar5883
      @pratibhakandarkar5883 3 года назад +11

      @@theimortal1974 Cool movie... lots of swearing though

    • @TinNguyen-rl2xr
      @TinNguyen-rl2xr 3 года назад +1

      Swearing is tight

  • @joshuagilmartin5795
    @joshuagilmartin5795 2 года назад

    “But physically I can tho” and “I decided” are the two most powerful phrases in the whole universe. Those words can let you achieve anything

  • @adc1222
    @adc1222 3 года назад +350

    "I'm gonna need you to get alllll the way off my back about this not paying thing"
    "Okay let me get off of that thing"

  • @michaelcosta4468
    @michaelcosta4468 3 года назад +291

    Love how for the thief it's a lifestyle dispute, and for the clerk it's a negotiation of the social contract. Tossing ritual in the mix was also a brilliant move. Ryan is super smart.

    • @user-jy3zl2vp4b
      @user-jy3zl2vp4b 3 года назад +1

      The little rituals that people should NOT give up no matter which religion you practice or even if you are an atheist. Please, can we all agree on SOME of these rituals?!?!

    • @AnarchoTak
      @AnarchoTak Год назад

      @@user-jy3zl2vp4b cope lol

  • @That80sGuy1972
    @That80sGuy1972 3 года назад +3

    Do you know how you can tell Ryan is very talented? When he plays a guy who you should punch in the face, you really feel the need to punch him in the face... and, because he's doing this for comedy you are still laughing while you feel the need to punch him in the face... and feel confused that you are both raging against a character AND thoroughly amused... and leaving with a bit of confused laughter.
    Ryan George, you glorious bastard!

  • @Trishul99
    @Trishul99 3 года назад +36

    I like the fact that he put efforts into adding the small detail of adding a note in the advert which most of us could've just passed and wouldn't even realise that the juice didn't spill out of the glass even in 0 gravity. Thats Ryan George for you

  • @myellatorres2110
    @myellatorres2110 3 года назад +218

    the whole Jurassic Park discussion was hilarious 😭

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 3 года назад +6

      and making him watch it. Not sure what all the links are about above. Please at least say what they are. I don't click on blind links

    • @myellatorres2110
      @myellatorres2110 3 года назад +3

      @@recoveringsoul755 i think most are scams or take you to weird sites or videos :/

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 3 года назад

      @@myellatorres2110 those two are spamming the comments here so you're probably right. Didn't feel like getting Rick rolled today

  • @TempestsFist
    @TempestsFist 3 года назад +1

    That moment when the conversation suddenly changes to Jurassic Park. Relatable.

  • @dartheleven2108
    @dartheleven2108 3 года назад +114

    My new head-cannon in the Ryanverse: Every movie is just a bunch of him swearing

    • @amysteriouspersonintophat1458
      @amysteriouspersonintophat1458 3 года назад +5

      Yes of course, just like how he pitched them :D

    • @Mibbitmaker
      @Mibbitmaker 3 года назад +2

      Would be shocking in kids' movies!.... except that the kids in the Ryanverse all have beards, even the girls.

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад

      If people watch movies just for the swearing, does that mean those movies are blooming crock in every other respect?

    • @jelita_
      @jelita_ 3 года назад

      @@Mibbitmaker Not the cannibalistic baby Ryan though

    • @les907
      @les907 3 года назад +1

      Wait... the kids in the Ryanverse all have beards? I never noticed because the camera made their height seem so accurate.

  • @HarCoolReviews
    @HarCoolReviews 3 года назад +389

    I love the fact that Ryan is sponsored almost like every video

  • @incominglaunch
    @incominglaunch 3 года назад +6

    I love how your sponsorships are just skits in themselves I appreciate it so much

  • @touchgazon
    @touchgazon 3 года назад +108

    i like how the store’s name is ebn-expensive brand name. a cool little reference to an older video.

    • @jonnnnniej
      @jonnnnniej 3 года назад +1

      Omg, thanks! I knew it must have been a reference to an earlier video, but I just couldn't figure it out

    • @ronyorobio7096
      @ronyorobio7096 3 года назад +2

      Thanks! I was looking for this piece of info.

    • @octavioherschberg5280
      @octavioherschberg5280 3 года назад +3

      I thought it was very expensive brand and couldn't figure out what EBN meant. Thank you.

    • @aaronhurst4379
      @aaronhurst4379 2 года назад +1

      OH SHIT

    • @lisawilliams8180
      @lisawilliams8180 3 месяца назад

      THANK YOU

  • @shanesullivan460
    @shanesullivan460 3 года назад +24

    I think "but physically I can, though" is one of the unsung heroes of the Ryan George Catchphrase department.

  • @JakHart
    @JakHart 2 года назад +2

    I like the "first person to segway" segway. That was sweet.

  • @wesleyoldham4222
    @wesleyoldham4222 3 года назад +68

    "What if the ink makes a nice pattern and makes the shirt look even cooler?"
    I actually did that a couple weeks ago. I tried to freshen a shirt with some spray, but didn't realize it had bleach in it. But now I have Dragon Ball Z on the front, and some tie-dye patterns on the back that looks like it was ki blasted by Vegeta.

  • @laras678
    @laras678 3 года назад +18

    I know Ryan has to put a lot of work into these, especially since the editing is great. I continue to be impressed that he's putting out one of these and one for Screen Rant (and writing and directing those long ones on SR) every single week! And the quality has never dropped one bit. That's commitment.
    It makes my day when one of these pops up!

  • @dameonk
    @dameonk 3 года назад +4

    The "Sure" after the whole Jurassic Park tangent was probably the funniest punchline I've seen in one of Ryan's videos.

  • @meko4202
    @meko4202 3 года назад +221

    Fun fact: Ryan films all of these in Canada
    (which is why he's extremely polite in each video)

    • @Gigachad-bv4su
      @Gigachad-bv4su 3 года назад +6

      Everybody is better in Candace

    • @MJAYZ007
      @MJAYZ007 3 года назад +9

      That makes a lot of sense I decided

    • @AudieHolland
      @AudieHolland 3 года назад +9

      I hear he's even actually a Canadian

    • @markmac2206
      @markmac2206 3 года назад +5

      i hear its super easy eh.

    • @meko4202
      @meko4202 3 года назад +3

      @@Gigachad-bv4su who is candice?

  • @shekharsuman8496
    @shekharsuman8496 3 года назад +69

    I respect that everyone in this universe follows the "Sound+Job" design for names, Jonathan Lawyer, Steven Filmmaker, Mayor Politician.

  • @DonnovanThomas929
    @DonnovanThomas929 2 года назад +1

    I love how they just drop everything to watch the movie

  • @arjun_yee
    @arjun_yee 3 года назад +61

    ryan is just so uniquely funny. no one could copy him even if they wanted to lol

    • @ceceliaraby8099
      @ceceliaraby8099 3 года назад +2

      Must be why he only uses copies of himself. ✌

    • @jameshaining8791
      @jameshaining8791 3 года назад

      Nah, that’d be super easy, barely an inconvenience

    • @ThatCoalSoul
      @ThatCoalSoul 3 года назад

      You're not going to like The Fairburn Brothers!

    • @shaereub4450
      @shaereub4450 3 года назад

      What about Julie Nolke? She talks to herself too.

    • @arjun_yee
      @arjun_yee 3 года назад

      @@ThatCoalSoul i meant his style not the concept.

  • @martincalvo5923
    @martincalvo5923 3 года назад +41

    Nice to see that "Expensive Brand Name" settled for EBN

    • @jdotoz
      @jdotoz 3 года назад +2

      Next up will be "Xpnsv Brnd Nm" or something.

    • @adoredpariah
      @adoredpariah 3 года назад +1

      I thought it was a poster for a dyslexic Ben. Wow, now I know, and knowing is, um... What is knowing again?

  • @ethanclark4347
    @ethanclark4347 2 года назад +1

    This is crazy! Today I played a Jurassic Park video game. Then this evening my family recommended we watch Jurassic Park. And now I click on this random, unrelated video that happens to talk about Jurassic Park!

  • @AutismFamilyChannel
    @AutismFamilyChannel 3 года назад +242

    At least they found middle ground on Jurassic Park. I feel like WW3 will end when enemies sit down and watch Jurassic Park together.

    • @mamacito1795
      @mamacito1795 3 года назад +11

      I mean even if they're divided over that surely everyone could agree that we hate the one where the dinosaur says Alan right!?!?

    • @EFreD-ed4ds
      @EFreD-ed4ds 3 года назад +5

      I'm over here picturing enemies from Wonder Woman 3 sitting down and watching Jurrasic Park.

    • @AllosaurusJP3
      @AllosaurusJP3 3 года назад +2

      @@mamacito1795 Thats jurassic park 3

    • @AllosaurusJP3
      @AllosaurusJP3 3 года назад +9

      The original jurassic park novel was published in 1990
      The following year he cold war ended!
      Did this happen before???

    • @greasycheese1957
      @greasycheese1957 3 года назад +4

      @@AllosaurusJP3 we don't talk about 3

  • @LaughBoys
    @LaughBoys 3 года назад +141

    Shoplifting technique has come a long way since Ryan invented it. I have a feeling that nowadays most ppl don’t tell the sales clerk they’re gonna steal stuff before they steal stuff.

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад +9

      He was not going to until he was asked about it. That is pretty much what the Jurassic Park gates at the entrance of these establishments do as well.

    • @heyitsjustaz
      @heyitsjustaz 3 года назад +5

      That's probably where I've been going wrong

    • @Number1Vaulter
      @Number1Vaulter 3 года назад +2

      They literally just walk in with a garbage bag, take what they want, and walk out in California.

    • @user-jy3zl2vp4b
      @user-jy3zl2vp4b 3 года назад

      It's that Canadian etiquette showing!

  • @coffeecat086
    @coffeecat086 3 года назад +1

    So glad you read the adverts last:) also sitting here with insomnia from pain and your content NEVER FAILS to make me smile. Thank you so so much for it.

  • @HK-ds4ls
    @HK-ds4ls 3 года назад +27

    "Make a list of things i need to do and then not do them"
    He out here making new years resolutions in august

  • @tobiaswilson5994
    @tobiaswilson5994 3 года назад +66

    Apparently, when Ryan George says "I Decided" then the universe is like **GASP**

  • @raintree3383
    @raintree3383 2 года назад +7

    The only guy EVER in the universe to connect shop lifting with Jurassic Park

  • @alexsm3882
    @alexsm3882 3 года назад +41

    *"Things cost money*
    *I much prefer when they don't"*
    Samesies

    • @braymond1
      @braymond1 3 года назад

      Hahahahah bg chungusssss?…?.!!!

  • @ShaheerAhmed
    @ShaheerAhmed 3 года назад +84

    "Things cost money"
    "Ah well I much prefer if they dont"
    Oh..okay

    • @heyitsjustaz
      @heyitsjustaz 3 года назад +5

      I mean, he decided

    • @gypsywoman9140
      @gypsywoman9140 3 года назад +2

      I also much prefer when things don't cost money. A second preference is when things cost only just a little bit of money, my wallet decided.

    • @magiv4205
      @magiv4205 3 года назад +1

      Can't argue with that

  • @chriskoopa6310
    @chriskoopa6310 3 года назад +10

    I can't stop laughing at Jurassic Park. You must make more endings like that to movies.

  • @Jack-sy8mr
    @Jack-sy8mr 3 года назад +93

    I’d want to see what other movies are like in the Ryan-verse, I decided

    • @trevorpacelli8056
      @trevorpacelli8056 3 года назад +4

      That should be a new series, where Ryan re-enacts various movies like this time. It shouldn't be hard for him to do- it would be super easy, barely an inconvenience!

    • @t3chkn1ght
      @t3chkn1ght 3 года назад +1

      Other movies in the Ryan-verse are tight!

  • @jasperofthrones1310
    @jasperofthrones1310 3 года назад +259

    Why is nobody talking about how the Adstronaught’s sleep paralysis demon is a puppy?

    • @felixklenner342
      @felixklenner342 3 года назад +11

      Nobody looks this part of the vids 🤣

    • @thezoid.withfreaky04
      @thezoid.withfreaky04 3 года назад +36

      @@felixklenner342 I speak for all Ryan George fans I say we watch the ads part cos the ad-stronaut is freaking hilarious

    • @abbycross90210
      @abbycross90210 3 года назад +16

      He's a cat guy, of course his demon is a chihuahua.

    • @liberalsockpuppet4772
      @liberalsockpuppet4772 3 года назад +6

      Shh! Do not rouse the puppy demon's anger

    • @unrellated
      @unrellated 3 года назад +8

      I thought everyone had a puppy for a sleep paralysis demon. Are you saying yours is a kitten, or something?

  • @glitchyboi4400
    @glitchyboi4400 2 года назад +1

    i love how they just have a nice little bondage in the video

  • @nchan602
    @nchan602 3 года назад +26

    I like how the storekeeper ended up befriending and likening the thief lmao, they watched Jurassic park together and everything

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад

      A robbery does not have to be an unpleasant experience.

  • @hunterkiller1440
    @hunterkiller1440 3 года назад +663

    "I can underpay workers, buy products from sweatshops, and overcharge customers, I decided." - The Establishment

    • @daerdevvyl4314
      @daerdevvyl4314 3 года назад +49

      “I’ll constantly talk about the evil Establishment as if I’m talking about other people, I decided.”
      - The Establishment

    • @Mr.Ekshin
      @Mr.Ekshin 3 года назад +12

      Okay Antifa wannabe.

    • @hunterkiller1440
      @hunterkiller1440 3 года назад +5

      @@Mr.Ekshin How am I Antifa when I am describing Apple, their favorite product?

    • @Mr.Ekshin
      @Mr.Ekshin 3 года назад +10

      @@hunterkiller1440 - You didn't specify any particular company, so it could be assumed you're one of those types that thinks all business is 'evil' and therefore it's okay to steal from them.

    • @hunterkiller1440
      @hunterkiller1440 3 года назад +8

      @@Mr.Ekshin Did I ever say it's okay to steal from them? I was more in line of thinking not going to those establishments.

  • @cwispygiraffe
    @cwispygiraffe 3 года назад +14

    theory: the adstronauts are canon, and are just floating around up there, constantly spouting about their companies

  • @elizabethhachet7329
    @elizabethhachet7329 3 года назад +20

    "You can't just decide not to pay." Ah, the heart of every shoplifter.

  • @rushilpatel7418
    @rushilpatel7418 3 года назад +29

    This guy is one of the reasons I still believe in humanity

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад

      I'm pretty sure AGW proves that humanity is real.

  • @willvgo2950
    @willvgo2950 3 года назад +2

    Ryan really nailed the scene with Hammond's tour intro using a video talking to himself & passing it off as entertainment.

  • @Nachosbroheem
    @Nachosbroheem 3 года назад +93

    "Oh okay, that's a good guy, that guy's nice, I like him".
    Ryan, you're fuckin marvellous. (I'm allowed to swear a lot, I'm from Jurassic Park)
    (No wait, I meant Australia, I'm from Australia.)

    • @nerdbird9660
      @nerdbird9660 3 года назад +10

      Australia, Jurrasic Park... Same difference.

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад +3

      @@nerdbird9660 It's full of deadly fauna you won't find anywhere else in the world, so that checks out.

  • @bron379
    @bron379 3 года назад +15

    When you're having a terrible day and Ryan George uploads and you forget what's sadness for 5 minutes? Love those

  • @PhonesHQ
    @PhonesHQ 2 года назад +1

    I like how in this universe Jurassic Park exists, but nobody has ever tried to shoplift before.

  • @user-gx8dl1dt2y
    @user-gx8dl1dt2y 3 года назад +122

    Just realized Ryan sounds like he's reading an AI generated script everytime. Would be funny to give a bunch of Ryan George videos to an AI script generator cause I bet it would do a pretty good job.

    • @Dargonhuman
      @Dargonhuman 3 года назад +5

      I'm wondering if there'd even be any difference...

    • @GrumpBurger
      @GrumpBurger 3 года назад +1

      I agree, shame I couldn't be your 69th like, have a blessful day.

    • @parrytheplatypus6570
      @parrytheplatypus6570 3 года назад

      I was here to like you on your 96th like. It's the funny number backwards.

  • @bambinocinefilo9702
    @bambinocinefilo9702 3 года назад +28

    This is kind of a prequel from another universe to “The first guy to ever be in prision”

    • @fae206
      @fae206 3 года назад +1

      I thought that guy stole a hat? (And also less importantly someone’s face)

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 3 года назад

      @@fae206 No, the guy who took the hat because he decided he liked it to be his and nothing physically prevented him from doing it didn't go to prison, but he did have to return the hat to not have to go there.

  • @Caty15
    @Caty15 3 года назад +7

    Can we just appreciate that ‘expensive brand name’ is the store they’re at

  • @The-Rest-of-Us
    @The-Rest-of-Us 3 года назад +541

    Now I have to google if those tags actually spill ink over the shirt when you remove them; thanks.

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 3 года назад +80

      or you could go to Lock Picking Lawyer's channel and see how to quickly remove them with a Magnet

    • @LavroseRovender
      @LavroseRovender 3 года назад +8

      @@recoveringsoul755 you just need a strong mag

    • @recoveringsoul755
      @recoveringsoul755 3 года назад +4

      @@LavroseRovender said that

    • @jacobl6714
      @jacobl6714 3 года назад +21

      @@recoveringsoul755 why yes, you did say that. You both said it. you said it first though, so I guess.....you win something, and the other guy has to admit he lost and commit hari-kari now?
      But seriously howwwww is that something that guy is allowed to instruct people to do on his channel? Even if he says "now don't actually do this because stealing isn't nice" I can't imagine you could do that lol

    • @jelita_
      @jelita_ 3 года назад +2

      I didn't know that either

  • @picturebreakdown
    @picturebreakdown 3 года назад +131

    I’d like to personally give an award to the people who commented “first” to commemorate their stupendous achievement

    • @LockhartDan
      @LockhartDan 3 года назад +2

      Dude, you do MARVEL and Star Wars Breakdowns?!😱 so cool

    • @thegoldenmask2051
      @thegoldenmask2051 3 года назад +1

      First!

    • @crcker3841
      @crcker3841 3 года назад +7

      the people who make fun of people commenting first are now just as common as the people commenting first

    • @roninmaster7721
      @roninmaster7721 3 года назад

      thx bro

    • @QibIi
      @QibIi 3 года назад +1

      @@thegoldenmask2051 first

  • @joshuawalton6447
    @joshuawalton6447 Год назад +2

    I too cried at the park being super f***ing Jurassic. Greatest moment in cinema history.

    • @gossguy7947
      @gossguy7947 Год назад

      This guy was born 3 months ago or something

  • @sabrenacarter9917
    @sabrenacarter9917 3 года назад +19

    “ Oh I was just going to head home and make a list of things I need to do and then not do them” 🤣😂 love these skits

  • @valky5318
    @valky5318 3 года назад +172

    "So if things cost money, where did you get the shirt?" "Oh I took it from a child." "A child?" "Yea, I even gave it a dollar." "Wow, that seems like a lot less than you're charging me for!" "Especially considering I gave the child 1 dollar for an entire day's worth of shirts."

    • @williamstark9568
      @williamstark9568 3 года назад +17

      Ah, the first man to ever run a sweat shop?

    • @kennyg1358
      @kennyg1358 3 года назад +3

      I guess it okay to steal it then. Or maybe buy some used clothing and donate the left over money to help some poor children. Like the saint you pretend to be.

    • @RicardoPetinga
      @RicardoPetinga 3 года назад +12

      @@kennyg1358 So no one should point out how messed up things are because doing so is like pretending to be a saint? How about admitting the fact that Valky is entirely right and we should stop doing what they described and come up with a better way to do things, one that probably doesn't involve the silly rituals and middlemen that Ryan makes fun of in the video? Sure, it's not okay to steal, and yet you seem to miss the part where business owners literally steal other people's labor value and wages, and allow or even require child slavery.
      Your bitter cynicism helps no one.

    • @kennyg1358
      @kennyg1358 3 года назад

      @@RicardoPetinga oh please. Move to a communist utopia if you can't handle reality.
      People get compensated for the value they bring. The product of a third world labourer is next to worthless without access to markets and brand power.

    • @beyond-journeys-end
      @beyond-journeys-end 3 года назад

      @UCEvYS0l6lm2RCP4SEWFJ_5A Damm you weak bastard. Tell people to fick off if they don't bow down and conform/do what you do.

  • @sonicthebyrd2788
    @sonicthebyrd2788 2 года назад +1

    I love how nice all the Ryan's are

  • @marclanman1902
    @marclanman1902 3 года назад +150

    Another Ryan in store: "Hmm, if I stuff the shirt down my pants, I won't have to have that long pointless discussion with the clerk." THAT'S the first guy to shoplift.

  • @heyitsjustaz
    @heyitsjustaz 3 года назад +7

    me every time a new Ryan video shows up: "Okay that's a good guy, that guy's nice I like him"

  • @tookie36
    @tookie36 7 месяцев назад

    He can carry an entire channel on his back and lift up an entire shop?!? What a man ❤

  • @Bombopapierle
    @Bombopapierle 3 года назад +15

    a - How much did this shirt cost?
    b - Nothing!
    a - That must be hard to find.
    b - No it's super easy, barely an inconvenience.

  • @rhumrunners7
    @rhumrunners7 3 года назад +16

    When a shoplifting video turns into watching Jurassic Park.
    Me: Yes this makes sense thank you very much.

    • @Thursdayschildfar2go
      @Thursdayschildfar2go 3 года назад +3

      The penalty for shoplifting is watching Jurassic Park 3, I decided.

  • @fatimaf4212
    @fatimaf4212 3 года назад

    Okay Ryan George, You've made a giant fan out of me. Like a huge one.
    I can almost hear producer guy going
    " ohhhh making fans out of not-so-active social media users is Tight " and he wouldn't be wrong

  • @ricasiogaming7873
    @ricasiogaming7873 3 года назад +133

    I like how Ryan strips societal norms down to its basics. It makes this everything feel so silly

  • @luislujan8784
    @luislujan8784 3 года назад

    Lol the cutaway to show them watching Jurassic Park just so the thief can know what the clerk is talking about.

  • @adg5889
    @adg5889 3 года назад +26

    Man, Ryan really has a way to emphasize how our entire society is based on super delicate social constructs that would crumble so easily if enough people ever decided not to abide.

    • @user-jy3zl2vp4b
      @user-jy3zl2vp4b 3 года назад +1

      You mean like today's world in the USA?!? That roar of thunder is all our norms and social constructs crumbling.

    • @Panda_Gibs
      @Panda_Gibs 2 года назад

      Except all these social contracts have solutions behind them. They are only fragile in these scenarios because it's the first time something is happening. Like in this one, sure people can and do shoplift, but eventually these people get caught by the police. This is accompanied by the police recording what happened. Judges can see a long term pattern and decide punishment according to the frequency and severity of the crimes. And employers can do background checks to see if the person is a habitual criminal. He doesn't cover these details because comedy.