Trans Masculine folk and "Feminine" Gender Expression
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- Опубликовано: 6 июл 2024
- Thank you all so much for watching, ilu ❤❤❤
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Sees any man with nail polish: "ok, hot."
"My body is male because it belongs to me and I am male" has honestly helped me so much.
Same
Lol
This reminds me of a quote from Sophie LaBelle: "I was not born in *the wrong body*. I'm a girl. This is my body. Girls have all kinds of bodies." I am questioning my gender and really needed to hear that. Everyone needed to hear that.
I don't get that. If I weren't in the wrong body, I wouldn't have an issue. If it were just about my gender expression, I would just be a butch woman-- but that's not the problem at all. I love femme shit. But not in this body!
@Karen Van Zant hello fellow human, you sound uneducated about the topic, here is some science to educate yourself: blogs.scientificamerican.com/voices/stop-using-phony-science-to-justify-transphobia/
What you're saying about freedom in gender expression when being read cis vs. freedom in gender expression when being out as trans is sooooooooooo true. Trans people are policed far more than cis people for their gender expression, and the only purpose is to invalidate our identity. Thank you for this.💚
@Karen Van Zant Except for people in other countries who are being KILLED for their identity...
@@TheZionrouter yeah I live in Morocco wich is an Islamic country and being LGBTQ in here is illegal, but I hope to go live in Canada in the future to be able to transition.
@Daphne Van Zant not sure what country you’re in but there’s plenty of issues with this in the US. It’s not just predominantly Muslim countries.
"I have a uterus, but it is a man's uterus because it is mine. I have a man reproductive organs : it's my uterus (...) I get to decide how my uterus identifies, not you. Why ? Because it lives inside me"
Thank you so much for this !
I also laughed a lot because I pictured a uterus with little eyes, floating (for some reasons) in space. No one ? Okay...
Teddy Hrrs my uterus’s eyes are the ovaries lmao
@Karen Van Zant yes you're right, facts don't care about your feelings: the existence of trans people was scientifically proven, so yes males can have a uterus, that's called trans men, science validates that. Biological males don't have uteruses, only biological females do, and trans males are biological females, so they have a uterus (unless they get surgery to remove it)
Most stupidest thing I've ever heard. Your really gonna say that you decide what your uterus identifies and not us? If you have a uterus you are a *Female* not a male. Ben Shapiro once said "I'm not gonna modify basic biology, because it threatens your subjective reality".
@@someonesomeone3776 Men can not have a uterus. It's scientifically impossible. Don't think I'm right? Let's see the proof.
@@shadow705 biological females have a uterus, biological males don't. If you still don't believe the existence of trans people then here is a link so you can educate yourself: blogs.scientificamerican.com/voices/stop-using-phony-science-to-justify-transphobia/
Men, at earlier times in history, wore makeup, “painted” their nails and wore frilly shirts and floral embroidery on their clothes. It is a fairly recent historical development that such things have been labeled as “too feminine” for men or the purview of only woman.
Yes... the 1980's 😉
Yeessss historical context preach to the course
@Karen Van Zant Trans people don't transition because of stereotypes or "girlish" and "boyish" things, they transition because they have gender dysphoria wich is a serious mental issue that can only be helped by transitioning. Trans people aren't "pretending" or trying to be someone they're not, this is just who they are and they are trying to be themselves. If you still don't get it, I'll tell you a little bit about my every day life: I am very uncomfortable in my body, I am dysphoric every day, it brings me so much emotional pain, when I was 8 I wanted to grow a penis, I strongly believed that I would one day wake up and have a male body and go through male puberty, but as I grew up I realised it was impossible, the day I reached female puberty at the age of 12 I passed out, I got panic attacks and was about to commit suicide, I wear multiple layers of clothing every day to hide my chest because I can't get a binder, in my dreams I am always male, I am disgusted by my body, I had an addiction to cutting when I started puberty to cope with the changes of my body, but luckily I was able to get out of it, I always wear hoodies and baggy clothes to hide my body, I am ashamed of my body, showers are the biggest challenge for me, I shower with male swimming suits because I can't handle being naked, I rarely go out apart from going to school because I'm afraid from being misgendered, misgendering causes me so much pain, I struggle with a severe depression and I'm very suicidal, I wrote 4 suicide notes and commited suicide at the age of 13, I tried to come out to my family but they made fun of me and hurt me a lot, attention is the last thing I want, now I'm just a hopeless 14 y.o boy waiting to die to end all the pain. I'm sorry for this long paragraph but I hope you change the way you think of trans people. Trans isn't a choice, no one would choose to go through all this pain, no one would choose to be bullied, descriminated and murdered for being trans. The rate of suicide for trans individuals is 41%. Our lives are very hard..
@Daphne Van Zant yeah no
yes!! iirc, painting nails started with Babylonian warriors to differentiate between class/rank. black was higher rank while green wasn't. i'm also pretty sure they painted their lips to match their nails too!
I'm very typically masculine presenting but I love bright colours and stuff so I like having lime green nails. I don't know if it's a thing in the US or other places, but in Australia there's a thing called the Polished Man Campaign that's basically like Movember except instead of growing out your 'stache you paint your nails, to raise money and awareness of child sexual abuse. People usually assume that's why I have nail polish on sometimes, and while I like that people don't question me for it, it still feels weird that anyone should need a 'cover story' or a 'good excuse' to do something as simple as wearing nail polish
Omg I wanna paint my nails but I only can do it in black cuz that's the only color boys are accepted to wear (y'know, cuz emo lol) and that's only sometimes, some ppl will still see it as a "ur a girl!" Thing and I really hate it😭
Reclaiming freedom of gender expression from a gatekeeping cis-centric society is the most affirming sh*t ever tbh ♡ I love yr wholesome videos about this & also thx 4 mentioning trans men who r not on T/pre-/non op ☆
Omg I literally teared up watching this. You voiced so many things I've been thinking lately and in such an eloquent, effective way. This hit me in a lot of places and I'm so glad you made this video
redcloudofrandomness same same same! I seriously kept myself up late a couple night ago because I love makeup and some other “feminine” things and it just reminded me about how a friend said I needed to make up my mind and it just made me feel very doubtful and insecure, but fuck that. Im over it now.
@@HONEYDROP11 I'm glad you were able to get over it and your friend was wrong, you are valid and a powerful person. I wish you the best in your life •‿•
I have been using makeup since I was 11 and I actually wore a crop top once in highschool, lol. I also started to do exercise with the girls during my last year in highschool. Yet, I still Identify as a cis man and I"m really happy to see this video, because it emphasizes the idea of dgaf about people's opinions -which is really important when it comes to be happy. *Good content* ❤
This video came out at the perfect time for me. I go back to work tomorrow after being out on disability. They changed the dress code and we can wear whatever colours we want. I bought a light purple shirt because purple is my favourite colour. My mom asked why I bought such a “girly” shirt. It hurt me. But watching this made me say screw it. It’s on me. It’s a mans shirt then.
Aaron, this is exactly what I've been struggling with this week
insidiousChaos oh my gosh, me too! So good to see someone else like me :)
I’m going to give the link to this video to people who ask why I used to dress hyper masculine vs how I dress now (I wear a lot more floral print, flowing wraps, leggings, stuff like that) when they ask why it took so long for me to get comfortable dressing how I do. This video perfectly sums up my experience with gender expression. Love your videos :D
This video was really helpful and important to me as a afab non-binary person who only experiences social dysphoria (like, I don't hate my chest, parts etc. it's only when other peoples perceptions of my body being "womanly" that I feel dysphoric, and even then sometimes I don't mind but sometimes it makes me want to peel my skin off haha) I struggled with feeling valid or "actually non-binary" for a while and occasionally still do, so even though this video isn't specifically targeted to me, it's still relevant and helpful so thank you Aaron!!!
Non binary is a stupid thing. You were born a certain gender. You can't just say your not a female or a male, no motherfucker you identify as what you are at birth. I don't give a fuck what else.
@@shadow705 wow, rude.
once i feel comfortable with painting my nails pink its over for yall
(this video made me so happy, i have been having a hard time with my gender expression thank u so much!!)
sas *throws a bottle of pink nailpolish at you* So pink them already dearie! :D
Once when I was in elementary school, a boy came to class dressed all in pink, with pink nail polish. I admired his dedication to the color that day. It's one of my favorites, too!
Man, I really won't let myself wear nailpolish or really anything femine but I'm sure as soon as I get on T and I start to pass I'm sure I'll allow myself.
This video made me feel so much better about my expression. Thank you!
This is me too. I wear men's clothes and I bind when I can (only have 1 binder), so I'm doing my best to pass with what I have.
@@skywise8 Same. I dont have a binder (yet anyway) i only have sports bras so im trynna pass with what i have.
@@ghostkid8201 I have a sports bra too, one size too small. I just bought a compression top recently as well.
I have been told my face is very feminine. :(
WHO IS THAT SHE DOESN'T GO HERE
Thank you for giving so much inspiration. Im a transgender guy who also pains my nails. I like it. Its cute. Go for it.when it feels right, its is. Go for it. You look awsome. Rock those nails bro
Wow I love this video so much. And that nail polish! You rock that.
This is so validating, especially the part about having a male body because you are male. Yes. I love this. I feel so empowered. Keep up all the great work Aaron! I see all the effort you're putting into your channel right now and it is so awesome. :-)
Aaron thank you so much for posting this literally just last week I wanted to put on some nail polish (cuz I like the way the brush feels lol) but I didn’t want to because I thought people wouldn’t take me being trans seriously but you helped me realize I can do whatever the fuck I want and whatever I do is male because I identify as male
So thank you so fuckin much
Love you
Honestly this channel is helping me out so much, thank you ❤️
Don't ask me why dude, but when I saw the notification for this pop up, my excitement manifested itself in the form of me repeatedly slapping my knee. Anyway I'm gonna go watch now LMAO
You are just killing it lately with your videos 💗
Honestly every one of Aaron’s videos is pure gold
I'm so happy that you posted this, especially today because I was getting really anxious and kinda dissociative about painting my nails pink and glittery. But watching your video helped ease me brain.
Okay last comment, and then I'm out ✌🏽
What you said about how you used to like painting your nails, but didn't like to be seen has been PAINFULLY RELATABLE for me (w/ any of my more "fem" stuff, too). I'm trying to break down every box and barrier I have whether it was put up by cisciety, myself, or both. It's heavy, but I'm getting there. Ilu~ 💖 thanks for being a shining light for us all
Thank you for this video. I've been kind of on a makeup kick recently but feeling like I have to tone it down for the sake of other people. It helps seeing someone else owning that kind of self-expression.
Thank you for making this video, I have constantly been questioned about my transition because I love doing traditionally feminine things like painting my nails and wearing shirts I found in the "women's section"
I PAINTED MY NAILS THIS SAME COLOR TWO DAYS AGO WE'RE MATCHING
I love how much content you’ve been putting out! They’ve all been really great videos!
yassssss i need to show this video to my entire family! Thx for mentioning thisxxx love your channel.
Aaron's pep talks are the best! Honestly, his comments are like the things we tell others that we feel we can't say to ourselves. ✨
This was a great video Aaron, I always love your videos but you made SO many great points here. I feel like your videos could often be linked when trying to educate people and I say that as a compliment. Also, your shirt is rad dude, and you do you!
This really connects with me. Thank you for putting this out in the world
my spouse (cis man) use nail polish, bright red is his favorite.
You are so well spoken and I appreciate your insight :)
Important & clear & respectfully stated. xo
I got an ad!
If you want the nail polish to last longer, I think not putting a clear coat on first helps.
Fantastic video, I love the thing about your body being male because you are male.
No. 1 Fander I was thinking the same thing. Like where is the matte base coat, where is the top coat and most importantly where is the holo!? 😂😂😂
Rose Juliette holo the most important part 😂
He is not a male. If he wasn't born a male at birth, then no he isn't a male.
@@shadow705 notice how everyone is sharing positivity and you're the only one sharing negativity and putting people down.
You beautiful soul... bless you and your words. * *-* *
I soooo needed this right now, thank you.
"it lives in MY body.' '...take the power back..." Hi I loved this.
My son i love this video! Keep doing you!
Another great video Aaron!!! Love you buddy!!! ❤️
Saw this video on my feed just after I painted my nails for the first time in maybe ten years. I was nervous as I am a trans guy, but nail polish really doesn't change anything
i'm painting my nails while watching this video
Thank you so much. I’ve been trying so hard to find a video that talks about this and just haven’t had any luck, so I was super happy when I got to watch this! As a trans man who likes to wear dresses sometimes and do my makeup or whatever I get a lot of remarks about it and geez I really needed this pep talk. Thanks again! :)
You give me so much strength to be myself. Thank you for being the amazing person you are 💕💕💕
Thank you so much for this. This has been such a struggle for me.
This is a wonderful video! Thank you for putting my thoughts and opinions into words!
You perfectly explained thoughts and concepts that are always floating around just in my head, but that I never actually fully communicated. This video is definitely a fave to save. Love you Aaron. 💕
I love this, Im so grateful that I found your channel and that youre sharing so much with us. much love to you. ❤️
ohhhhh my gosh this! is! exactly! the mindset that has been helping me immensely with dysphoria, and its really nice to hear it outloud. It's made it pretty manageable (also with presentation and masc hair cut that helps a lot although I don't pass which sucks) and I worry a lot that I'm not trans enough because it's not, like, debilitating atm? which is prolly kinda dumb and I'm talking a lot, so long story short,
aaron you're very comforting and sweet and it's a nice reminder that even with social and physical dysphoria for a lot of nb/trans people, clothes, makeup, and nail polish are just things, and they don't have to control us. anyway, ty and ily and have a great day.
Your video quality is just incredible
Thank you, so much! I've been having a hard time with this sort of stuff, and it just really helps to hear someone else say this.
These videos mean a lot to me, and I really appreciate you making them.
I fucking love how you go about discussing ‘female and male’ reproductive organs. It’s your uterus therefore it’s a male reproductive organ because you are male. That’s so fucking empowering and I’ve never heard anyone else put it that way. You just helped me break down a stigma I didn’t even know I had against my own body by giving me the means to talk about it. Thank you Aaron. 💚
This video kind of saved my life. Thank you.
If you want nail polishes to last longer a base coat and/or a top coat could help it last. Or if you want to be able to peak it up faster/easier then Elmer’s glue mixed with some water and using that as a base coat can make it easier to peal off. My sister really doesn’t like nail polish lasting that long so she doesn’t do base coats or top coats. Also top coats that aren’t just clear are a thing. They can be rainbow or sparkly. It really is fun to get into nail polish.
McKenzie Brennan they also make dedicated peel off base coats. The channel Simplynailogical did a test on all forms of peeling base coats including Elmer’s glue
Aaron this video was really awesome. you are one of my fave youtubers ♡
you know what you are saying gives me the same amazing feeling of agency as reading max stirners work... thanks for that! you are amazing.
Yoooo this fucking video. All of it. Gah I agree with everything in this video so much and I'm so glad there are others that feel the same way. Especially that bit about the social dysphoria. I used to love wearing heels for example but only in my room cause as soon as I'd walk out I knew people were going to see that and make the wrong assumption. Thank you for making this video ❤❤❤
Amen ! This vlog is powerful , you wear that nail polish all you want :)
Thank you so much for this video I have been struggling some much recently I can't thank you enough
Aaron, I adore the print on your shirt!
Do whatever you want to do, you look great!
The part about objects not defining gender....remind me of my therapist seeing my new phone case and was like..."That's actually feminine" *looks at my BLUE phone case...* ummm...not only do I not know how a case can be feminine but why if you're being stereotypical about objects would you think a blue phone case is feminine....it's smaller than my other one...but...
I love this video Aaron xoxo. I painted my nails black last week for the first time in two years. I try to see it as more of a Punk Rock/metal thing instead of entirely feminine
literally needed this video today
Thanks so much for this video Aaron. I’m in the beginnings of my transition (been on T for 7 months) and I do find myself questioning my own masculinity especially when I compare myself to cis males. But it’s true, it’s based mostly on societal constructs/pressures and not on how I identify and feel on the inside. I am a trans man and I need to listen to myself, and not others, when it comes to how I express my masculinity. Whether it be how I dress, how I look or what I wear etc. I identify as a male and that is what I am. 👍🏼 Thanks for reminding me of this. I need to be who I am and love who I am.
I’m scheduled for top surgery in two weeks from today. Super anxious but excited. 😬😆Wish me luck! 💕
You are AMAZING Aaron
I feel like the "roam where you want to" picture behind you is very thematically appropriate for this video (and those pictures are just really cool). Nonetheless, this is a really important message, and I'm glad you're putting it out there, Aaron. You voice a lot in here that I've struggled to put into words until very recently.
The happy music just lifted my mood so much-
I'm definitely waiting to be comfortable within myself so I can start wearing make-up & get my nails done again. Those things were things I enjoyed doing because it expressed my uniqueness. I battle with these thoughts everyday, but after watching your video it helps me see that I can do these things without worrying about what others think since they're not me. Thanks for the pep talk. 💜
i needed this video. thank u sm. :') 💓
I've just started t and I don't "pass" at all yet, but I decided last night, "Fuck it. I'm wearing nail polish." I love nail polish, I love glitter--still a man!! Wow!! I love it. Thank you for this timely validation.
Thank you so much for this video. Yesterday I was told very clearly exactly what you had said, that although I may identify as male I will always be female because of my anatomy and although I didn’t believe it hearing those words really hurt and made me waver considering it was from a parent. Knowing that no matter what I say they won’t ‘believe’ me. So thank you for reminding me that I am who I am and I should be proud of it and fuck what anyone else has to say about it. I really appreciate your videos and hope you have a wonderful day.
I looooooove it! Thanks for express yourself.
I really like your geometric bear pillow! I want it 😭
I LOVE your iris shirt!! I love when men express themselves, wearing flowers, nailpolish, and/or makeup! I think all genders should be able to express both female and male sides in whatever way. I love and support all of you who express yourselves how you want
I love your iris shirt!
I feel happy when Aaron uploads a new video.
I haven't heard such thoughts from anyone but me.
oml I'm so glad you put a basecoat under the colour! I've seen so many people not do that and it gives me so much anxiety thinking of them trying to get it off later on 😂🙈
I shaved my legs last week and immediately regretted it. Mostly because I then felt naked and dreaded the hard stubble that was gonna come, but also because for some reason it made me sit differently? Like I started crossing my legs again (which I don't like anyway) and the way my legs moved just went all Venus Razor Ad which made me very uncomfortable, I can't wait for it to grow back tbh 😂😂
But it sucks that not "passing" as the gender we identify as can make gender expression feel like such a fragile thing. 🙈
Social dysphoria sucks major balls
(can relate to the peeling off of the nail polish, always do it, so satisfying)
The uterus thing was great. I also have a male uterus.
No you do not!
I'm sorry but I think you stole all of my recent thoughts out of my head! Such a great video. I relate so much.
Just got round to watching this, and lol, I’m wearing the exact same t-shirt right now 😎
I'm definitely more stereotypically masculine in that I'm not a massive fan of makeup, nail polish etc., but since socially transitioning I've really come into my own about how I enjoy expressing myself. My wardrobe has got more colourful and I have more shoes and hygiene products than ever before. I love styling my hair and having different looks for different situations. Before coming out I had none of this.
And that part about the uterus being male because it's yours, THANK YOU. I can't stand it when people invalidate a uterus being male "because it defines reality" or "you're ignoring your body parts which is unhealthy". It's like, no I'm not. I completely acknowledge I have a uterus, but I'm still male.
Love that shirt!
Yes, yes, yes I so relate to this thanks for sharing
I love this so much. The point about these objects not being feminine really resonated with me, I wear nail polish, I'm planning on wearing booty shorts and a crop top to pride in a couple of weeks but none of it is feminine to me, it's just a different way of showing my own masculinity.
I felt rlly good putting on makeup this morning and then when I saw the notification for this video I was like, "wow hello perfectly timed relevant message".
This really verbalizes a lot if my feelings. Im afab and before i started presenting more masc and realising i was nonbinary i really did enjoy presenting more feminine and it caused me so much doubt. What you said in the beginning and towards the end about enjoying things but not wanting to be seen is so on point for me. Looking feminine makes me dysphoric bc i know it makes people read me as a girl which is uncomfortable. But that doesnt mean i dont like it free from that. The things themselves dont make me dysphoric, its social dysphoria (which is most of my dysphoria incl body dysphoria is mostly about others perception).
Im really glad you made this video i havent heard anyone explain the way I experience dysphoria until now and its making me feel a lot better.
Preach!! 💙💙
That's exactly the video I needed right now. I'm a trans guy pre everything (I'm only out to my closest friends) and tomorrow I wanna go to school in a dress but I wasn't confident enough to actually do it. But now I think I'm gonna do it. Thank you so much!
"Nail polish and make-up and clothes are not powerful enough to change who you are fundamentally .. no one else's opinions, no one else's words are more powerful than our own, and our opinions are not less than the opinions of cis people" AMEN GOOD SIR! You, and only you, are the expert on your mind, body, and self! Plant Daddy TM you did such an excellent job at explaining gender and gender expression in this video in a way that I think truly anyone, even someone totally new to these concepts, could understand. Also you rock that nail polish and you have no idea how huge of a smile your absolutely adorably sweet, "hi, hello, hi" brings to my face every single time 😀💕😀💕
THAT NAIL PEELING STIM THOUGH. I can't wear polish for much longer than a few days. 👌Rip me.
I LOVE this video thank you so much :) I'd love to ware nail polish, makeup and dresses sometimes, unfortunately at this point and time they make me way to dysphoric but I think once I start T I'll be able to do all that stuff :)
thanks for this i’m a feminine, pre-t, pre-op trans guy and i’ve been super insecure that i’m not passing and this video rlly helped me feel better
I needed to hear all of this. I've been thinking all of this for so long, and it's been making me so upset, and I've just felt so alone. But this made me feel like I wasn't the only one
Aaron, I love the music in your videos and the things you say make me feel so much more valid. Also, I thought you'd like to know that when my friends don't know who you are I describe you as baby groot.
Ooo I love your nail polish and flower shirt~ I never thought I could be a guy if I didn't want to be super MASC!!1!!
Feeling much more comfy after seeing more representation
Started wearing earrings again for the first time in like 20 years
I really relate to what you said about enjoying wearing nail polish but not wanting to be seen. I used to love dressing feminine and wearing makeup just because it was a form of art to me, but seeing mirrors and being reminded that that was what I looked like all the time and that was how everyone else saw me made me so uncomfortable.