I still remember early in my career, I was walking through the airport in full uniform and a little kid was looking at me with this look of awe! I walked a little taller, until I heard him say, "look mommy, a policeman!" The only time my uniform got me any respect.
I was in uniform, waiting for transportation and my crew at a very nice hotel. Someone came up to me and asked me to load her baggage in a taxi. Some people will just never get it. Ma'm, I am not a bellhop.
I do not feel that way. I have the upmost respect for you. Truth be I bet most of these bitching have never be on a plane Let them be on a plane and land in a storm with high winds. And everyone is praying around you. You will want to hug the Pilots men and women up front. But we can pay a dam black football player that takes a knee millions.
"Attention passengers this is your captain speaking, we have hit a slight updraft and we will now be vertically launched upwards into space. Don't worry, we will be landing on the moon shortly. We'll be about 20 minutes behind schedule, thank you for flying southwest airlines"
My coworkers in AZ are always telling me how much like they like flying Southwest. Should have known this whole time they've been spending their layovers at the Tycho Crater Roller Rink.
'Observant passengers on the left hand side of the plane may have noticed we have lost our port wing. Do not worry, this happens all the time and it's why they give us a spare. We will be making an emergency landing shortly to go look for the missing wing and we apologise about the delay.'
This is your captain speaking, we've been blown slightly off course and will be arriving 30 minutes behind schedule. Our new route has some great views though, and if you look out the left side windows, you can watch us dock with the ISS before proceeding to our destination. Thank you for your patience and for flying with American Airlines.
I spent about twenty years flying right seat with my dad (either in his Mooney or A-36)... was fun to work the navs and comms and even fly the plane a little here and there (no I’m no pilot at all). BUT, that hummm of the plane and general feeling while flying pretty much gave me narcolepsy lol... the first 30-60 minutes after wheels up on cross country flights I always had to fight off the naps as hard as I could, I would often just give in and nap but I’m no professional pilot so I guess I’m allowed to nap in the right seat lol. When dad would catch me napping he’d bank or nose down hard enough to wake my ass up lol. Anyways I lost dad to cancer a little over a year ago (he was 61 and it was a sudden onset of stomach cancer). Those right seat memories I have with him are some of the best I have!
That's awesome. I'm sorry about your dad but those are memories that most people will never have. My dad passed away last month and I have lots of good memories with him when I was younger but we drifted apart later in life. Most of my best memories with him were just funny conversations and situational humor, nothing out of the ordinary but good enough for me. The worst part are the memories we shared when it was just me and him. Now, if I forget any of them, nobody will ever know. Keep your memories alive.
@@thecaptain5026 Yes I wish to someday get my private license… it’s not at the top of the list and would just be a hobby of sorts if I ever were able to afford the hobby pilot lifestyle. My dad loved flying just to fly, I loved it because of the places you could reach in fractions of the time driving and spending time with him. He didn’t fish or was not into sports so didn’t have the typical father son activities… we had flying, and hunting (which is about the only typical father/son activity we had). He could t sit still and didn’t watch tv so he was either working in the yard or at least 3 days a week would go to the airport to just hang out at his hanger and fly the pattern.
The man also blinks on average ever 4.8 seconds -- on a repeating chicadean mathematical rhythm, of course.. What if pilots ARE the autopilots ?? OMG..
@@SabbaticusRex ibis also scripted to be slightly variable. Between 3 and 7, biased towards 5, and every now and then jumping up, but more variable towards 4 or 3.
@@RalphEllis I was being facetious. I'm aware that pilot uniforms, hats, wing badges, etc grant them respect. I was pointing out that it was a weird example for a list of "stuff pilots don't want you to know".
James M the uniform doesn’t really command respect, the whole point of the uniform is to show the people, that highly trained professionals are in control of there lives, not random people.
26: If the Fasten Seat Belt sign flashes three times,,, that's code for flight crews to put on their parachutes and proceed to the secret exit door in the back of the plane.
27: Flight attendants occasionally check the wings for gremlins, which tend to rip them apart. If the attendants see a gremlin, they'll give the pilot a "T. Zone" code and the plane will make a slight turn to shake the gremlin off. So, what might appear to be a turn for a course correction might actually be an attempt to shake a gremlin off the wing.
Attention passengers. "We have no fuel left and will now be exiting the aircraft with our bail out chute. The pending updraft will now take you into a elliptical orbit were you will fight to the death over the 32. Oz water bottles and packaged nuts. Thanks for flying Southwest."
Great video as usual. Thank You for being honest and real. My wife and I fly often (domestic US) and I've told her several times, "Hey, the flight crew are well trained,competent, qualified professionals who want to get home safely to their families as much as we do". Also, THANK YOU for your service. Our men and women who serve and have served deserve our support, respect, and admiration.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I just wanted to let you know we're squawking 7500 up here. I just dialed it in right here on the transponder. Just wanted you to know. Carry on."
At Beale AFB in the late 1980s a U-2 pilot was passed over for promotion to major. He took a hard look at his situation and decided to find work with an airline. At one interview he was asked if he had ever been violated. His answer was , "Well, not by any friendly nations" I was the superintendent of the 9 SRW Standardization and Evaluation Division.
European short haul two pilot cockpit pilot - 3:10 we have "Controlled rest in the cockpit" rules - but it is almost an emergency procedure. You have to fill out an Air Safety Report if you do it. I can't remember anyone in the last 5 years or so doing it. 4:!5 Never been saluted, never had my hand shaken. I am called "Captain". 5:23 We don't eat passenger food - we get garbage crew food meals that are worse (most crew refuse to eat them at all, and bring their own food). No first class on my (current) airline. On a previous airline (which had first class) our contract stated that we get the same meal as the best class on board - so we ate first class meals. 5:56 It's illegal for a control seat to be occupied in flight in the cockpit by a flight attendant, but they do stay (standing) in the cockpit if the door cameras aren't working in order to let the pilot back in from using the lavatory. If you gotta go, you gotta go - so most go. Some (not manuy) with big bladders don't go until turn around. 6:34 Introverts and grumpy buggers who you don't want to fly with don't talk. The guys you want to fly with are able to hold a conversation (and thus keep both of you awake). 7:10 Typically autopilot on from seconds after take-off (just after gear up) until 1000' (about two minutes) before landing. What pilots WANT you to know is that the autopilot is just another way of flying the aircraft - it requires as much input and programming as hand flying - so autopilot "on" still equals "flying the aircraft". 9:02 We're permitted to read newspapers etc in the cockpit. That's pretty normal. Novels too. 10:15 In 20,000 hours the worst I've landed with was 45 minutes fuel remaining - after extensive weather holding and traffic. The airline has never questioned carrying extra fuel. 11:29 I've been struck by lightning 6 or 7 times. 12:35 The water tanks are tested every 48 hours and cleaned every 30 days. It's called "potable water" (i.e. drinkable water) for a reason - and I drink my tea made from it every working day. The worst that has happened is too much cleaning fluid, giving a faint chlorine taste to the tea. The ice is loaded fresh, as ice. 13:05 It's not uncommon to hear the "du du dud du du du" tone of a phone searching for a tower over the VHF radio, if the sheilding on the aircraft cables is poor. So phones can interfere - is that enough to affect the flight? 14:25 Airline pilots are paid reasonable in the lower levels and well in the higher levels. ... and very badly outside of the airlines. My pay as a flying instructor was below the poverty line. .. I gave up at that point. :)
I was an airline pilot with a major airline for 19 years and from the base I was assigned, almost all of our international flights departed from 10 pm -12 am. Most of the were actually only 5-6 hours in duration. The problem is that mots of the pilots were not able to get any "quality" sleep during the day because of stuff i.e. family. So because of the natural circadian rhythm you hit the wall around 3-4 in the morning. Now considering that we were landing at some of the most dangerous airports in the world in Central America....one of which was literally in a valley surrounded by big ass active volcanos. That combined with bad weather and poor navigation aids made these approaches "challenging" to say the least. Usually you were landing right as the sun was rising. Need less to say...if one of us was having a "sinker" we would ask the other pilot how they felt and take a 20-30 minute cat nap. NASA did a major sleep study on the effects of sleep deprivation and cognitive function. Even NASA said that a short period of sleep would increase metal alertness several fold and made comparisons of sleep deprivation to having the impairment of several alcoholic drinks. So...I ask you...would you rather your pilot's had a 20-30 minute "supervised" cat nap...or would you rater fly into a 14,000 ft volcano? Oh...quick pilot joke. What do you call a successful layover? The flight engineer gets a hotel room. The co-pilot gets laid. And the Captain has a bowel movement.
come on, not the whole, but it is heavily promoted by the likes of google fb etc. There is a lot of good stuff, you're just not necessarily lead to but have to find it
My boyfriend once banged a flight attendant at 35,000 feet in the galley and the pilot made a big deal about it and tried to marry them before we landed. Apparently it's bad luck to do that on a flight out of wedlock.We landed safely, throwing that stupid wive's tale out the window.
C.M., thanks so much for this vid - and all the others, of course! As a private pilot whose dreams of commercial aviation were shattered by the industry collapse following 9/11, I truly appreciate and respect what you’re doing for your viewers, both the ones seeking a career in aviation and those just along for a vicarious ride. Keep the great content coming - I’ll check out your books, too! Cheers, dude!
@@Kay_213_ -- It's natural. It's leftist theorists who have embraced postmodernist notions about the nature of truth, which essentially claim that there's no such thing. Postmodernism in essence claims that all "truth" is either subjective feelings or the biased "social constructs" of this or that group, i.e. propaganda. And that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy for them. If you don't believe in truth, then you don't have much of a chance of adhering to the disciplines that make at least good approximations possible. Just wait. Let's see what Durham digs up, and how real evidence might prompt the on-the-fence, half-persuaded victims of postmodernist indoctrination to think twice about trusting half the crap they learned in college humanities and social-science courses.
After going through some turbulence and in calmer air, I will keep the seatbelt sign ON, head to the lav to take a quick leak before returning to the flight deck to turn the seat belt sign OFF.
Straight up, man. I used to fly light aircraft, but I'm currently grounded ( medical ). When I fly commercial, I play phantom pilot. That results in some of the best flying I have ever done, especially the landings.
"They don't want you too see the computer so you don't know autopilot is on" 99.99% of people would have no idea what they're looking at in any kind of aircraft, much less on WHICH display shows whether autopilot is on or off. I also think there's a mosconseption that once on autopilot, the human pilots have no control, or there's a lengthy process of turning autopilot off. Reality is, as soon as the human pilots(s) touch anything, the plane reacts. The system's all have manual overrides for autopilot.
@@Kay_213_ Yep, Tar.MacAdam (Asphalt) just like your neighborhood street, supporting the weight of 200ton wide body aircraft for takeoffs and landings, taxiing, and parking(Actually, about 18 inches of reinforced concrete) --- and how about, "Waiting on the runway for 1/2 hour before takeoff"? Sure, and airplanes are landing over yours while you're waiting, Stupid f---g news writers and reporters.
20:44 I laughed so hard I fell out of my chair! This entire video, I could almost hear your thoughts. "Holy crap. No way people are this dumb. Do people really believe this? Wait....what?!" And then the CNN screenshot. You almost killed me. I laughed so hard, I thought I would pass out. Thank you for the ab workout.
This is just more proof that you should question everything you read/hear about something you have no first hand knowledge of. Credibility, integrity and honor in media no longer exist as the norm. Thank you for this video!
13:17 - in regards to using cellphones - the signal for incoming cellular calls can be picked up on audio systems in what sound like morse code patterns, which can be a risk in busy airspace by compromising the audible contingency for audible codes such as VOR and especially ILS identifiers 15:00 I’m not sure where you’re getting your figures from but regional airline salaries here start at $26,000. It’s only the big companies that start their 2nd officer salaries off at $50,000.
I really enjoyed this piece!!! I was rolling with laughter through most of it. Particularly the part about the Air Force One pilot. The president is a human being too. This article tells you a lot about the mentality, mindset, and understanding level of many adults not just in this country, but around the world. Either you know . . . or you don't, and what they fill that unknown space with tells you a lot about the individual, their fears, and mostly about their relationship with their Creator . . . if they have one!
@@Kay_213_ Yep. As a terrified flyer. Once they seal the cabin door I think "well hopefully the air frame stays intact, upright & doesn't hit anything". Cause chance of escape is nil once the takeoff roll starts!
I welcome imminent take offs, that's kinda the reason I boarded the plane in the first place. Do people board a plane just to chill on the runway with tray tables up, seats in upright position, seatbelts on and their one personal item stowed under the seat in front of them listen to the safety demo then get off of the plane?
@@drakeisacake He was making a joke about the bacteria in your digestive tract flourishing by feeding on the bacteria and microbes found in raw freshwater.
Great video as always Mover. This reminded me of a funny saying our F-15 fighter pilots had in the Mass Air Guard. Most of them were airline pilots out of KBOS. They jokingly said they flew the school bus during the week and flew the Corvette on drill weekends. (Bill Fihl from Slidell).
9:28 pilots reading :) Had occasion to fly in a BN Trilander from Inverness (ICAO: EGPE) to Wick (ICAO: EGPC) just the pilot and myself. Once we were out of Inverness and on route he let me take the controls, after a couple of minutes of watching me he took out a book and started reading, read a page scanned the instruments and outside then back to the next page, all while I was flying in the right hand seat. - it was a good time ago around about 1980. I did enjoy the flight from Wick to Inverness as one of the passengers on board, the return flight was supposed to be empty and was how I got the call to ask if I wanted to go fly the aircraft, was handy having friends in the tower at Wick back then. On the return to Wick the pilot demonstrated the Trilander's short field performance, all in all it was a great experience tho once trimmed the aircraft practically flew itself.
As a former "mailman", I understand the "captain" thing. It was easier to not correct non-postal workers than to tell them each time that I am a City Letter Carrier, not a mailman or postman. What I didn't like though was when I'm delivering mail in really bad weather and someone would say the Postal Service motto is that "rain, sleet, snow and the dark of night" thing. That is not the Postal Service motto. Never has been. The Postal Service motto is "We deliver". Truth be told, I didn't like that one much either, but that's the correct motto.
I recently started watching your channel - great job and THANKS! Sleeping while flying? I am a private pilot ('56 Bonanza) and frequently power-napped on the way while my non-certificated "co-pilot" wife took the controls. I always filed IFR flight plans even in clear weather; extended airway legs were excellent rest opportunities. Terry was a great "stick" in that she efficiently managed course-following headings and altitudes. She would wake me up when ATC called on the radio - the only task she didn't want to take on. As a student pilot, controller communication was the only really intimidating thing until I learned that there were predictable things to listen for - then it became easier and I soon learned to be clear and concise as well. I always wondered about that coffee water; I travelled Delta every Sunday-Thursday for some 23 years.
I’ve been around the aviation biz as civilian and as a military member. My resume includes working as a baggage handling, maintenance (flight line and back-shop) and airplane pilot. Yet, I’m amazed how many people who have never even been to an airport tell me I know nothing about aviation because they learned something on the internet.
Hey C.W I just wanted to say thanks for all the great videos, I wanna become an Air Force Pilot and I have been starting to work very hard to achieve that goal and your videos are very helpful!
Great video. There was one thing I did in my airline cockpit that I did not want passengers to know about. In February of 2011 I finished training and began to carry a firearm. Once the cockpit door was locked I unlocked it and put it on. Obviously I did not want anyone but my crew knowing I was armed. My airline gave us the same size bottle of water before each leg, just like the one you showed. Great job of debunking the stupidity of the "so-called aviation experts" that really don't know crap about flying.
10:32 I was in a plane that, I believe, ran out of fuel once. I would love your input on the details of this story. I was flying from LA to Miami. When we got to Miami there were really bad afternoon thunderstorms. I have been through this before no big deal. We circled above the clouds in above the airport for over an hour and then at a certain point in time the plane went silent all the lights went off immediately the air became warm and humid in the cabin. The plane tilted down about five degrees. All the flight attendants were obviously shitting themselves but strapped in to little seats I hadn't even noticed before. We hit the run way hard and stop short. We had to wait for one of those little trucks to come get us. Also the plane was tilted forward as we sat on the runway waiting.
15:35 yeah I mean we circled the airport, I mean that was common but the afternoon thunderstorms will usually move long enough to land. In Miami. Point is, flying above the weather.
I'm an airline pilot as well. Friend of mine at a major carrier had an engine failure once; got down just fine. When a passenger thanked him for getting them down safe, he told her, "Hey, I was strapped to the same piece of metal that you were!"
There are two pilots up there. The odds of them both kicking the bucket in the same flight are extremely low. Unless the aircraft impacts the ground, in which case the odds go up a little bit.
@5:50 I don't dehydrate myself anymore now that I fly a plane that has a lavatory but when I flew King Airs up north doing mail/cargo runs then we used to (jokingly) aim for "tactical dehydration" The goal was not to drink anything most of the day and then down a lot of water as soon as your day was done. We didn't have a lav and had sometimes long flights. Being hydrated wasn't practical.
@David McLean: "Air hostess"?? Obviously, you haven't flown on an airline since the Equal Opportunity Employment Act was passed, in 1977, when the designation was officially made, "Flight attendant". Prior to that, the term, "Stewardess" was common, but "Air hostess", is your own invention. Incidentally, the EOEA, is also the reason why they're no longer under 32 and single and, by virtue of seniority, the older flight attendants, male and female, are seen on the longer trans continental and overseas flights. Fewer flight segments, more rest, higher pay.
@@vincesbardella3838 Do you need to be so worked up about this? How about you laugh at the joke and let the rest of us wallow in our crippling ignorance.
"To lessen the fear" they don't wan't you to know when the they set AP? Hell they should play the AP disengage tone over the cabin PA together with the inevitable "wtf is it doing now?" in heavy turbulence. *That's* fear
I think people completely have the wrong idea of what the autopilot actually does. For the most part, it just maneuvers you to the altitude and heading of the vectors you've set, and then maintains it for as long as it's confident that it can do so reliably. If it detects any issues, turbulence, or traffic, it'll shut off and alert the pilots to resume full control. People seem to think that it's some majestic AI that takes over the entire plane and makes all the decisions for the entire flight while the pilots just sit back and "read a book" or "take a nap". Hell, compared to a Tesla, the autopilot on an aircraft barely lives up to its name. Maybe the term "autonavigator" would be more accurate; it certainly doesn't replace the pilot/driver, unlike Tesla's Autopilot.
I’m not a frequent flyer by any means, but I’m no stranger to flying. Probably been on about 40+ flights in my life and I have yet to have a rough flight. A few less than smooth landings, sure, and maybe some turbulence from time to time(completely normal) but every flight has been otherwise completely safe. Never even had a go around or gone into holding. I just don’t understand why some people are afraid of flying. It’s super safe, and these guys are real pros. Thanks for all you do and keeping us safe in the skies. I’m 33 and still love flying; that little kid in me never died. Always love that moment the pilot throttles up on the runway on takeoff and that point when you see the runway under you on landing.
awww..gone are the days when a kid such as i at 12 could be sitting in the left seat and make a turn toward Detroit. It was a Stratcruiser, as I recall...a thrill never to be forgotten.....and I'm fairly certain the statute of limitations has run....
When I was kid it was still common practice to invite all children to visit the cockpit. It was done during level flying but still an interesting experience to see different cockpits. I remember at least MD-11 and 747. I'm not sure if I visited any other as those were most common planes here.
I travel extensively for work (Pre COVID-19) and I've heard and seen a lot in my time on an airplane. Turbulence so bad it tossed the beverage cart, go arounds, aborted take offs etc....Only one time has the Captian informed the plane of a maintenance issue. On a red eye from LAX to IND said a hydraic system was malfunctioning and we would be met on the runway by emergency gear and a rug to take us to the gate as there would be steering issues on the ground once we landed. I have confidence in the people flying in today's world. Thanks for the vids. I enjoy watching.
10:10 if I’m pilot monitoring, I usually play Tetris on my phone because you can set it to “one finger” mode and just play it with your thumb, so you can always have another hand free to key up the mic
Excellent vid as usual sir. As a (longtime!) retired RAF pilot I certainly appreciate your very measured comments on the world of aviation. I look forward to the next instalments. Cheers from a (very IFR) Sevenoaks, Kent, UK.
"passengers aren't mechanics" Honestly as an aviation tech I don't want to know about any mechanical problems when i'm out traveling. I've had to fix enough sub par work to know that there are some birds I will refuse to fly on.
10:13 I do remember a scandal involving Ryanair (of course). Now, I don't remember all the details but they had an internal ranking of pilots and the amount of gas they pumped into their flights. The airline set an average and if your average of gas ordered was higher than the general average (or average set by the airline) you'd get fired or get a warning. This got public when a Ryanair flight bound to Valencia had to reroute to Madrid due to bad weather. In Madrid, they were queued because of the huge influx of rerouted flights. The captain had to signal a distress call and state that they couldn't stay in the queue due to fuel shortage. Eventually, they could skip the queue and land safely. Hopefully this has been addressed by now!
Just to give a UK differences perspective.🇬🇧 Yes, we nap. Known as controlled rest, limited to 40 minutes at a time to prevent sleep inertia (look it up peeps). We fly up to around 8:30hrs with just two crew, not getting augmented crew until a flight is longer than that. Trying to stay awake through the night when tired carries a higher risk of falling asleep at a more inopportune time. No, we don’t eat the same food as the passengers, and at least one pilot will have a different meal to the others on the flight deck. Our crew food is generally around a ‘business class’ standard. We certainly don’t get First Class food - eating lobster and caviar every day would soon get boring. We don’t have rules regarding whether we read on the flight deck - an 11 hour flight gets pretty boring, there are only so many war stories you can swap! Not just regionals - but you can end up on a different airline due code-sharing - we code share with American, Finnair, JAL and others. Everything else is pretty much as you’ve summarised.👍🏻
First class is a bit of a euphemism on US airlines. With luck US first class food is on par with business on European airlines and with slightly nicer econ food on Asian ones.
To add to this: First a video about the bunks on long haul flights: ruclips.net/video/1venL93QmXA/видео.html And a video by a European pilot on the nap: ruclips.net/video/aQSDZOZ0cJ0/видео.html
Thank you for your video. Here's one for you, I read that on long flights they have a secret chamber to put a dead body in case someone dies during a flight.
I really like your videos! Over here in Europe we indeed do have regulations on in flight napping. One example of how those rules might look: max 15 minutes to not fall in deep sleep, wake up latest 30min before top of descent and advise cabin crew so they check after the 15 minutes have elapsed.
Lol, so now if I ever see you in the terminal coming through the waiting area, I’m going to quickly stand and salute and loudly say “attention on deck”. Lol
"#2 They downplay any problems." Pilot: Ladies and gentlemen, I don't want to alarm you back there but we're about to crash. And once again, we want to thank you for flying with us.
I fell asleep flying Microsoft Flight Simulator one time, the altitude horn woke me up and I landed safely. The passengers had no idea.
@Future President
Did you also stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night? Hahaha.
@6 6
Let me know in a few years when the investigation is done. haha
@@watershed44 " Did you stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night?"...Comment of the week. lol
I think you meant to say the passengers 'virtually had no idea' ;)
Direct to blog.
I'm surprised they didn't say the "engines" are actually cooling fans for the pilots. Usually when they turn off, the pilot starts sweating.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂🤣🤣
Lol
Flying bus....
@Monster Fueled I worked line service for a while. Can confirm. Lol
I still remember early in my career, I was walking through the airport in full uniform and a little kid was looking at me with this look of awe! I walked a little taller, until I heard him say, "look mommy, a policeman!" The only time my uniform got me any respect.
(While in uniform): "Sir, are you a pilot?" Me: "No, I'm a paramedic." Them, now confused, "Oh." Works 99% of the time...😈
I got are you a bus driver from a kid at the grocery store. I said in a way, yes ?
I was in uniform, waiting for transportation and my crew at a very nice hotel. Someone came up to me and asked me to load her baggage in a taxi. Some people will just never get it. Ma'm, I am not a bellhop.
Peter Steitz Living the Dream 😂👍🏼
I do not feel that way. I have the upmost respect for you. Truth be I bet most of these bitching have never be on a plane Let them be on a plane and land in a storm with high winds. And everyone is praying around you. You will want to hug the Pilots men and women up front. But we can pay a dam black football player that takes a knee millions.
"Plane can't maintain altitude when tanks are empty"
Yeah, that's why they are usually filled with fuel.
I swear that caption is so retarded !
Well they can, But it would be in like a hangar
The perfect ad for CNN. (The most trusted name in news.) Lol,
Thats because there is no fuel in them to keep the engines running
They can’t maintain altitude but the glide from 30,000 feet could be something like 50 miles
"PIlots love landings".... beats the f*ck out of all the alternatives, doesn't it.
Lol can't argue with that 🤣
You always land at some point, how smoothly you land is another thing
@@_EllieLOL_ "a good landing is any one you can walk away from. A GREAT landing is one where they get to use the plane again"
You gotta land sometime. You know, who's gonna mow the lawn, decorate the Christmas tree, take the dog to the vet, etc...
😂
I'm definitely gonna go around the airport saluting pilots now for reactions
Do it full out-click your heels and stand at attention-and last not least: tell us how it went! :D
...im gonna go to class this week and salute my flight instructor just to see the look on his face...
Lol I would salute myself when I'm a pilot xD
Words 'go around' triggered the wrong trigger in my brain
Uncovered and inside.
"boeing 777 will struggle to maintain altitude once the fuel tanks are empty"
my stomach hurts
fetB you i heard that all Boeing planes have this issue O_O
Planes don't even work that way...
Mobius Zero hey, cough cough, its a joke
I thought the plane become more buoyant when the tanks are empty? Why would it lose altitude?
@@secretsquirrel8010 They are a lot lighter. I thought so too
"Suck with confidence" is one of the best things I've heard today.
I passed this tip to my wife, no response yet.....
Another T Shirt in the making! Love it.
😂😂😂👍
@@PhantomMark well, it's a mouthful
I jotted it down when I heard it. Hopefully I will be able to keep it mind for my future challenges.
26: we aren't actually in the plane. Right before takeoff we jump out and grab a remote control to control the plane
Rick te Kronnie
I knew it!!!
@Jeffrey Blosser *pulls out gun* always have been.
@Jeffrey Blosser You're supposed to leave the gun cocking to someone else, otherwise the joke is ruined.
An Aenar drone controlled by the Romulans?
@@virginiaconnor8350 exactly like that 😂 only this doesn't change shape
"Attention passengers this is your captain speaking, we have hit a slight updraft and we will now be vertically launched upwards into space. Don't worry, we will be landing on the moon shortly. We'll be about 20 minutes behind schedule, thank you for flying southwest airlines"
That’ll be the future, spacecations
My coworkers in AZ are always telling me how much like they like flying Southwest. Should have known this whole time they've been spending their layovers at the Tycho Crater Roller Rink.
nah bro spirit
'Observant passengers on the left hand side of the plane may have noticed we have lost our port wing. Do not worry, this happens all the time and it's why they give us a spare. We will be making an emergency landing shortly to go look for the missing wing and we apologise about the delay.'
lol
"oh no updraft...well, looks like we're going to space!"
This is your captain speaking, we've been blown slightly off course and will be arriving 30 minutes behind schedule. Our new route has some great views though, and if you look out the left side windows, you can watch us dock with the ISS before proceeding to our destination. Thank you for your patience and for flying with American Airlines.
All those poor gliders stuck in space
Updrafts a.k.a Reverse Blackholes
Requesting clearance to go Space Shuttle status.
Approved as requested.
hilarious indeed!
It's all auto pilot. The pilot is just there to type in the captcha.
@John B where
@John B yes
@John B You okay buddy?
Maybe, but most general aviation aircraft do not have auto pilot.
what's what the computer screen is for
when he pulled the bottle out while speaking about going to the toilet i thought he was going to say "I often piss in this bottle". Hahahahahaha
MATTY McSPLATTY I definitely expected the same thing
Me too 😂😂.
When Charles Lindbergh made his trans-Atlantic flight, he pissed in the bottle, and jettisoned it before he hit the coast.
wide mouth gatorade, cant be beat!
Yup, I was imagining his bottle full of pee rolling around in the floor of the flight deck, lol.
"If you read it in an article on the internet, it is always true." - Abraham Lincoln.
Never Trust something because it was written online- Abraham Loncoln
Tf is the internet-Tupac
Huh, LiNColN waSNt eVEn aLivE wHEn inTeRNet caME OUt. JokES on YoU.
unless it is on Wikipedia. If it is on Wikipedia then 100% of the time it has been edited by pranksters to say the literal opposite of the truth
wAiT aBrAhAm LiNcOlN aCtUaLLy sAiD tHaT??
I spent about twenty years flying right seat with my dad (either in his Mooney or A-36)... was fun to work the navs and comms and even fly the plane a little here and there (no I’m no pilot at all). BUT, that hummm of the plane and general feeling while flying pretty much gave me narcolepsy lol... the first 30-60 minutes after wheels up on cross country flights I always had to fight off the naps as hard as I could, I would often just give in and nap but I’m no professional pilot so I guess I’m allowed to nap in the right seat lol. When dad would catch me napping he’d bank or nose down hard enough to wake my ass up lol. Anyways I lost dad to cancer a little over a year ago (he was 61 and it was a sudden onset of stomach cancer). Those right seat memories I have with him are some of the best I have!
That's awesome. I'm sorry about your dad but those are memories that most people will never have. My dad passed away last month and I have lots of good memories with him when I was younger but we drifted apart later in life. Most of my best memories with him were just funny conversations and situational humor, nothing out of the ordinary but good enough for me. The worst part are the memories we shared when it was just me and him. Now, if I forget any of them, nobody will ever know. Keep your memories alive.
AtariBorn so for your loss Atari! Keep any of those good memories with you!
Good story, cancer sucks... Any wished to be a pilot yourself?
@@thecaptain5026 Yes I wish to someday get my private license… it’s not at the top of the list and would just be a hobby of sorts if I ever were able to afford the hobby pilot lifestyle. My dad loved flying just to fly, I loved it because of the places you could reach in fractions of the time driving and spending time with him. He didn’t fish or was not into sports so didn’t have the typical father son activities… we had flying, and hunting (which is about the only typical father/son activity we had).
He could t sit still and didn’t watch tv so he was either working in the yard or at least 3 days a week would go to the airport to just hang out at his hanger and fly the pattern.
We all are sorry of your loss
"This is your captain speaking. There is absolutly no cause for alarm"
"The wings are NOT on fire"
John Cleese, how to irritate people on a airplane
I was thinking the exact same.
More like
“My hot wings are on fire.”
Lmao
At 7:01 he says “we’re not robots”. I don’t know but that sounds a lot like something a robot would say.
lol.. The pilots are lie.
The man also blinks on average ever 4.8 seconds -- on a repeating chicadean mathematical rhythm, of course.. What if pilots ARE the autopilots ?? OMG..
😂😂😂😂
@@SabbaticusRex ibis also scripted to be slightly variable. Between 3 and 7, biased towards 5, and every now and then jumping up, but more variable towards 4 or 3.
@@SabbaticusRex #intellectuals
"Pilots don't want you to know that their uniforms command respect"
Sounds like something pilots would *want* us to know, if true.
Humble brag
If something commands your respect, then you already know it
That was the whole idea of the hat.
Check you own reaction to hat, or no hat...
@@RalphEllis I was being facetious. I'm aware that pilot uniforms, hats, wing badges, etc grant them respect. I was pointing out that it was a weird example for a list of "stuff pilots don't want you to know".
James M the uniform doesn’t really command respect, the whole point of the uniform is to show the people, that highly trained professionals are in control of there lives, not random people.
"We're not robots!" That's something a robot would say...
hmm... suspicious...
Synth...synth everywhere 😵
Ask Crew Scheduling, they will say pilots are robots.
“There is a cockpit voice recorder so If I die doing something stupid in the cockpit, the world will know” 😂 idk why I found that so funny
Hello F-16C
I'm F-35B
*(Hopefully Chain)*
Hello F-35B
I'm B1 Lancer
“Suck with confidence, lose with honor” I think I’ve found myself a new life motto!
suck what?
@@MeatBeatElite At life!
I can't decide if I want this engraved on a lighter, or tattooed on my hand.
I'm seeing a charm bracelet in gold.
That's actually a really good motto
26: If the Fasten Seat Belt sign flashes three times,,, that's code for flight crews to put on their parachutes and proceed to the secret exit door in the back of the plane.
That's what D.B. Cooper said!
@@thomastoups3451 jokes on you, They never found him yet!
27: Flight attendants occasionally check the wings for gremlins, which tend to rip them apart. If the attendants see a gremlin, they'll give the pilot a "T. Zone" code and the plane will make a slight turn to shake the gremlin off. So, what might appear to be a turn for a course correction might actually be an attempt to shake a gremlin off the wing.
Attention passengers.
"We have no fuel left and will now be exiting the aircraft with our bail out chute. The pending updraft will now take you into a elliptical orbit were you will fight to the death over the 32. Oz water bottles and packaged nuts. Thanks for flying Southwest."
I died 🤣
TheAceOfSpades do pilots really have bail out shutes ?
@@jacquelinevega8495 No. There are no parachutes that I know of on any airliner.
LMAO !!
😂😂😂
Great video as usual. Thank You for being honest and real. My wife and I fly often (domestic US) and I've told her several times, "Hey, the flight crew are well trained,competent, qualified professionals who want to get home safely to their families as much as we do". Also, THANK YOU for your service. Our men and women who serve and have served deserve our support, respect, and admiration.
Number 26: The reason Jack Daniels and Jim Beam bottles have flattened sides; So they don't roll around on the flight deck. :P
lol
LOL OK that's truly a good one! 8D
NSDQ
@@silntstl You Betcha!
hah!
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I just wanted to let you know we're squawking 7500 up here. I just dialed it in right here on the transponder. Just wanted you to know. Carry on."
This no joke made me laugh out how. How ridiculous would this be.
But if it was the captain speaking, then sqauwking 7500 would be...oh.
@@uncisbeastify only a few people would even understand wtf the pilot was talking about
Its Illegal to switch your transponder code off 8008... FFA regulation 6969
Oh no
At Beale AFB in the late 1980s a U-2 pilot was passed over for promotion to major. He took a hard look at his situation and decided to find work with an airline. At one interview he was asked if he had ever been violated. His answer was , "Well, not by any friendly nations" I was the superintendent of the 9 SRW Standardization and Evaluation Division.
#26 When the pilot bounces the landing it means they learned to fly in the Navy
yeah, the Ryanair Navy
You can be a pilot in the navy?
Im thinking about joining the navy, let me know pls
Nah it’s just getting your required landings in for currency.
@@blab3481 bro, the navy has more planes than the airforce lmao.
European short haul two pilot cockpit pilot -
3:10 we have "Controlled rest in the cockpit" rules - but it is almost an emergency procedure. You have to fill out an Air Safety Report if you do it. I can't remember anyone in the last 5 years or so doing it.
4:!5 Never been saluted, never had my hand shaken. I am called "Captain".
5:23 We don't eat passenger food - we get garbage crew food meals that are worse (most crew refuse to eat them at all, and bring their own food). No first class on my (current) airline. On a previous airline (which had first class) our contract stated that we get the same meal as the best class on board - so we ate first class meals.
5:56 It's illegal for a control seat to be occupied in flight in the cockpit by a flight attendant, but they do stay (standing) in the cockpit if the door cameras aren't working in order to let the pilot back in from using the lavatory. If you gotta go, you gotta go - so most go. Some (not manuy) with big bladders don't go until turn around.
6:34 Introverts and grumpy buggers who you don't want to fly with don't talk. The guys you want to fly with are able to hold a conversation (and thus keep both of you awake).
7:10 Typically autopilot on from seconds after take-off (just after gear up) until 1000' (about two minutes) before landing. What pilots WANT you to know is that the autopilot is just another way of flying the aircraft - it requires as much input and programming as hand flying - so autopilot "on" still equals "flying the aircraft".
9:02 We're permitted to read newspapers etc in the cockpit. That's pretty normal. Novels too.
10:15 In 20,000 hours the worst I've landed with was 45 minutes fuel remaining - after extensive weather holding and traffic. The airline has never questioned carrying extra fuel.
11:29 I've been struck by lightning 6 or 7 times.
12:35 The water tanks are tested every 48 hours and cleaned every 30 days. It's called "potable water" (i.e. drinkable water) for a reason - and I drink my tea made from it every working day. The worst that has happened is too much cleaning fluid, giving a faint chlorine taste to the tea. The ice is loaded fresh, as ice.
13:05 It's not uncommon to hear the "du du dud du du du" tone of a phone searching for a tower over the VHF radio, if the sheilding on the aircraft cables is poor. So phones can interfere - is that enough to affect the flight?
14:25 Airline pilots are paid reasonable in the lower levels and well in the higher levels. ... and very badly outside of the airlines. My pay as a flying instructor was below the poverty line.
.. I gave up at that point. :)
I was an airline pilot with a major airline for 19 years and from the base I was assigned, almost all of our international flights departed from 10 pm -12 am. Most of the were actually only 5-6 hours in duration. The problem is that mots of the pilots were not able to get any "quality" sleep during the day because of stuff i.e. family. So because of the natural circadian rhythm you hit the wall around 3-4 in the morning. Now considering that we were landing at some of the most dangerous airports in the world in Central America....one of which was literally in a valley surrounded by big ass active volcanos. That combined with bad weather and poor navigation aids made these approaches "challenging" to say the least. Usually you were landing right as the sun was rising. Need less to say...if one of us was having a "sinker" we would ask the other pilot how they felt and take a 20-30 minute cat nap. NASA did a major sleep study on the effects of sleep deprivation and cognitive function. Even NASA said that a short period of sleep would increase metal alertness several fold and made comparisons of sleep deprivation to having the impairment of several alcoholic drinks. So...I ask you...would you rather your pilot's had a 20-30 minute "supervised" cat nap...or would you rater fly into a 14,000 ft volcano? Oh...quick pilot joke. What do you call a successful layover? The flight engineer gets a hotel room. The co-pilot gets laid. And the Captain has a bowel movement.
I swear this article is like something you'd find on Buzzfeed... Sad.
@@ClintThrust-e8r Huffpost...
BuzzFeed. *shudder* that website needs to burn a fast flaming death.
Shirosake buzzfeed is a failing piece of garbage
come on, not the whole, but it is heavily promoted by the likes of google fb etc. There is a lot of good stuff, you're just not necessarily lead to but have to find it
My boyfriend once banged a flight attendant at 35,000 feet in the galley and the pilot made a big deal about it and tried to marry them before we landed. Apparently it's bad luck to do that on a flight out of wedlock.We landed safely, throwing that stupid wive's tale out the window.
Pilots don’t want you to know about the autopilot blowup doll.
Shirley you're not serious.
And WHERE you blow it up.
@@shadowproductions969 i am seriously and don't call me shirley.
@@bradstrayer485 I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👍👍
I’m an aircraft Mechanic for a major airline and it’s amazing how many so and so experts there are in the general public. Always enjoy your channel!!
"kill more Migs"..."when Gorillas fly Migs die"
C.M., thanks so much for this vid - and all the others, of course! As a private pilot whose dreams of commercial aviation were shattered by the industry collapse following 9/11, I truly appreciate and respect what you’re doing for your viewers, both the ones seeking a career in aviation and those just along for a vicarious ride. Keep the great content coming - I’ll check out your books, too! Cheers, dude!
"secret messages through the seat belt light"
The seat belt light is on... But what does it MEAN?
gotta love how "creative" they can get on bullshitting
Cheng YanYat just like the Democunts.
Trump 2020👍🏼
Just had to make it a political thing didn’t you? Just couldn’t resist huh?
@@Kay_213_ It's okay. Let them identify themselves. Makes it easier for us all.
Anything to harvest clicks and ad hits.
@@Kay_213_ -- It's natural. It's leftist theorists who have embraced postmodernist notions about the nature of truth, which essentially claim that there's no such thing. Postmodernism in essence claims that all "truth" is either subjective feelings or the biased "social constructs" of this or that group, i.e. propaganda. And that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy for them. If you don't believe in truth, then you don't have much of a chance of adhering to the disciplines that make at least good approximations possible. Just wait. Let's see what Durham digs up, and how real evidence might prompt the on-the-fence, half-persuaded victims of postmodernist indoctrination to think twice about trusting half the crap they learned in college humanities and social-science courses.
"Short sleeves with tie is kinda tacky". Truth has been said.
ur right we should loose the tie with short sleeves!!
Whatever chicks dig it. Heck all of NASA employees wore that style 🤣👍🏻👨✈️
@@lancairw867 yeah they did in the Apollo years
Bowtie - shirt optional
Personally, I prefer short sleeves with the tie. I "hate" wearing the jacket. Ugh.
After going through some turbulence and in calmer air, I will keep the seatbelt sign ON, head to the lav to take a quick leak before returning to the flight deck to turn the seat belt sign OFF.
Straight up, man. I used to fly light aircraft, but I'm currently grounded ( medical ). When I fly commercial, I play phantom pilot. That results in some of the best flying I have ever done, especially the landings.
What your telling me ad revenue Clickbait websites are not filled with 100% accurate information...
GASP
"They don't want you too see the computer so you don't know autopilot is on" 99.99% of people would have no idea what they're looking at in any kind of aircraft, much less on WHICH display shows whether autopilot is on or off.
I also think there's a mosconseption that once on autopilot, the human pilots have no control, or there's a lengthy process of turning autopilot off. Reality is, as soon as the human pilots(s) touch anything, the plane reacts. The system's all have manual overrides for autopilot.
They don't want you to see it because that implies your in the cockpit and that's 1000x worse for evereone else on the plane
As a former airline pilot, I often smile when reading the press. So much nonsense in there...
“Tarmac”
@@Kay_213_ Yep, Tar.MacAdam (Asphalt) just like your neighborhood street, supporting the weight of 200ton wide body aircraft for takeoffs and landings, taxiing, and parking(Actually, about 18 inches of reinforced concrete) --- and how about, "Waiting on the runway for 1/2 hour before takeoff"? Sure, and airplanes are landing over yours while you're waiting, Stupid f---g news writers and reporters.
How rough are the landings on an uneven *TARMAC*
@nightstalker You're telling me that you've never touched the *TARMAC* before?
“Go over to the parts department and get me 5 yards of flight line.”😂
I get free coffee in uniform. Lol. Once even got law enforcement discount at chick-Fil-a
Chick fil a is free for law enforcement in uniform though. 🤔😂
C.W. Lemoine what about military?
If it works it works
Some people think I'm in the Navy and I don't have the heart to tell them I'm former Air Force!
C.W. Lemoine and a pilot isn't law enforcement...
Great job with this one. I’m a former USAF, now longtime airline guy and someone sent me this article too: your points are all great. Thank you.
"Suck with confidence"
I see you've been speaking to my ex.
haha funny...my thought on pilots pay should be higher lots of cash for lots of responceabilty
owen smith Did anyone ask?
20:44 I laughed so hard I fell out of my chair!
This entire video, I could almost hear your thoughts.
"Holy crap. No way people are this dumb. Do people really believe this? Wait....what?!"
And then the CNN screenshot. You almost killed me. I laughed so hard, I thought I would pass out. Thank you for the ab workout.
krafty777 Yeah that was hilarious lol. ‘Twas a very slow day at CNN that day for sure.
My wife said she had never seen me laugh so hard as when i read the CNN screen shot of the 777's zero-fuel altitude problem...
Haha, CNN sucks.
“Ladies and gentlemen, our aircraft has run out of fuel so please fasten your seatbelts and prepare for an emergency landing.”
*Madagascar 2 scene*
This is just more proof that you should question everything you read/hear about something you have no first hand knowledge of.
Credibility, integrity and honor in media no longer exist as the norm.
Thank you for this video!
Article: "Pilots are grossly underpaid"
CW: ...thinks about new ZR1....."Meh"
Thanks for the humor CW, great video as always!
“Grossly underpaid”
(Laughs in a 6 digit salary)
RedJive213 A 6 digit salary isn’t really that much.
skyserf
300K is pretty good
RedJive213 Yes but most pilots aren’t making 300,000. 100-150K isn’t all roses. Especially with expenses.
skyserf
Not if you don’t give a shit about your own living conditions! :D
13:17 - in regards to using cellphones - the signal for incoming cellular calls can be picked up on audio systems in what sound like morse code patterns, which can be a risk in busy airspace by compromising the audible contingency for audible codes such as VOR and especially ILS identifiers
15:00 I’m not sure where you’re getting your figures from but regional airline salaries here start at $26,000. It’s only the big companies that start their 2nd officer salaries off at $50,000.
I really enjoyed this piece!!! I was rolling with laughter through most of it. Particularly the part about the Air Force One pilot. The president is a human being too. This article tells you a lot about the mentality, mindset, and understanding level of many adults not just in this country, but around the world. Either you know . . . or you don't, and what they fill that unknown space with tells you a lot about the individual, their fears, and mostly about their relationship with their Creator . . . if they have one!
“Take off is imminent... “
Sounds so ominous. Like the flight crew is the Borg.
You will remain seated with your inertial dampener firmly applied until instructed to do otherwise. Resistance is futile.
In the event of emergency, escape is impossible. Do not resist
@@Kay_213_ Yep. As a terrified flyer. Once they seal the cabin door I think "well hopefully the air frame stays intact, upright & doesn't hit anything". Cause chance of escape is nil once the takeoff roll starts!
I welcome imminent take offs, that's kinda the reason I boarded the plane in the first place. Do people board a plane just to chill on the runway with tray tables up, seats in upright position, seatbelts on and their one personal item stowed under the seat in front of them listen to the safety demo then get off of the plane?
If take off is NOT immenent shouldn't we get off this heap and find one that works?
Karen: "Don't get ice on an airplane! It could make you sick!"
Also Karen: "Have you heard of raw water? It's SOOOO natural! It MUST be healthy!"
Nextralife Helps build your gut microbiome
@@abooismail shut
Liquid water is actually cooked ice.
Use the deicer if you get ice on the plane.
@@drakeisacake He was making a joke about the bacteria in your digestive tract flourishing by feeding on the bacteria and microbes found in raw freshwater.
Great video as always Mover. This reminded me of a funny saying our F-15 fighter pilots had in the Mass Air Guard. Most of them were airline pilots out of KBOS. They jokingly said they flew the school bus during the week and flew the Corvette on drill weekends. (Bill Fihl from Slidell).
"Suck with confidence" is great first time advice for a variety of tasks.
9:28 pilots reading :) Had occasion to fly in a BN Trilander from Inverness (ICAO: EGPE) to Wick (ICAO: EGPC) just the pilot and myself. Once we were out of Inverness and on route he let me take the controls, after a couple of minutes of watching me he took out a book and started reading, read a page scanned the instruments and outside then back to the next page, all while I was flying in the right hand seat. - it was a good time ago around about 1980. I did enjoy the flight from Wick to Inverness as one of the passengers on board, the return flight was supposed to be empty and was how I got the call to ask if I wanted to go fly the aircraft, was handy having friends in the tower at Wick back then. On the return to Wick the pilot demonstrated the Trilander's short field performance, all in all it was a great experience tho once trimmed the aircraft practically flew itself.
"You can't let this ship sink. Do you know who is on board?"
"None more important than myself..."
"I have never seen anyone salute a Civilian captain"
If I ever catch you in your airline suit, i'll change that for you!
ShuRugal Oorus I was thinking that exact same thing!
As a former "mailman", I understand the "captain" thing. It was easier to not correct non-postal workers than to tell them each time that I am a City Letter Carrier, not a mailman or postman. What I didn't like though was when I'm delivering mail in really bad weather and someone would say the Postal Service motto is that "rain, sleet, snow and the dark of night" thing. That is not the Postal Service motto. Never has been. The Postal Service motto is "We deliver". Truth be told, I didn't like that one much either, but that's the correct motto.
13:23
In Turkey we have a saying that roughly translates to "Rules in aviation are written in blood."
I love listening to you speak. Very smart, very clear. Great vids man. Your channel has inspired me to want to become a heli pilot.
I recently started watching your channel - great job and THANKS! Sleeping while flying? I am a private pilot ('56 Bonanza) and frequently power-napped on the way while my non-certificated "co-pilot" wife took the controls. I always filed IFR flight plans even in clear weather; extended airway legs were excellent rest opportunities. Terry was a great "stick" in that she efficiently managed course-following headings and altitudes. She would wake me up when ATC called on the radio - the only task she didn't want to take on. As a student pilot, controller communication was the only really intimidating thing until I learned that there were predictable things to listen for - then it became easier and I soon learned to be clear and concise as well. I always wondered about that coffee water; I travelled Delta every Sunday-Thursday for some 23 years.
The person who wrote that article probably thinks an air guitar is a real thing.
same as an air plane
Shut up, it is, I've played it at weddings 😆
@@beetender9009 Okay anus, I mean Angus
that reminds me i gotta get new strings for mine
i get them at the same store that i get my blinker fluid from
It isn’t? 😳🤓
5:21 I love how fast you said it was wrong. It was almost instantly.
I’ve been around the aviation biz as civilian and as a military member. My resume includes working as a baggage handling, maintenance (flight line and back-shop) and airplane pilot.
Yet,
I’m amazed how many people who have never even been to an airport tell me I know nothing about aviation because they learned something on the internet.
"Suck with confidence. Lose with Honor." That may become my new mantra.
Coming from quarantine 2020 - You had me at "Suck with confidence." That is my new mantra for gaming.
Hey C.W I just wanted to say thanks for all the great videos, I wanna become an Air Force Pilot and I have been starting to work very hard to achieve that goal and your videos are very helpful!
every time i took a flight it was the same pilot... his name was Captain Speaking
He and Rodger get around.
Great video. There was one thing I did in my airline cockpit that I did not want passengers to know about. In February of 2011 I finished training and began to carry a firearm. Once the cockpit door was locked I unlocked it and put it on. Obviously I did not want anyone but my crew knowing I was armed. My airline gave us the same size bottle of water before each leg, just like the one you showed. Great job of debunking the stupidity of the "so-called aviation experts" that really don't know crap about flying.
10:32 I was in a plane that, I believe, ran out of fuel once. I would love your input on the details of this story. I was flying from LA to Miami. When we got to Miami there were really bad afternoon thunderstorms. I have been through this before no big deal. We circled above the clouds in above the airport for over an hour and then at a certain point in time the plane went silent all the lights went off immediately the air became warm and humid in the cabin. The plane tilted down about five degrees. All the flight attendants were obviously shitting themselves but strapped in to little seats I hadn't even noticed before. We hit the run way hard and stop short. We had to wait for one of those little trucks to come get us. Also the plane was tilted forward as we sat on the runway waiting.
15:35 yeah I mean we circled the airport, I mean that was common but the afternoon thunderstorms will usually move long enough to land. In Miami. Point is, flying above the weather.
I'm an airline pilot as well. Friend of mine at a major carrier had an engine failure once; got down just fine. When a passenger thanked him for getting them down safe, he told her, "Hey, I was strapped to the same piece of metal that you were!"
I was worried about flying once and someone said "If it's your time, that's it." So I said "what if it's the pilots time?"
Then it was yours also
Set your watch back 4 hours and you'll be off the plane in time to save your own life (in most cases)
There are two pilots up there. The odds of them both kicking the bucket in the same flight are extremely low. Unless the aircraft impacts the ground, in which case the odds go up a little bit.
If it's the pilot's time, you're about to have a story to tell...
You are equally as smart as the person who wrote this article.
"Suck with confidence... lose with honor" Sounds like a great family motto.
I'm a flight attendant. This video made my day, thank you. Ha ha
That's the worst list I've ever seen, laughable.
@5:50 I don't dehydrate myself anymore now that I fly a plane that has a lavatory but when I flew King Airs up north doing mail/cargo runs then we used to (jokingly) aim for "tactical dehydration" The goal was not to drink anything most of the day and then down a lot of water as soon as your day was done.
We didn't have a lav and had sometimes long flights. Being hydrated wasn't practical.
What! You don't get the hot air hostess to sit on your lap and teach her to fly and steer the plane? That's it I am quitting flight school.
few, close call.
@David McLean: "Air hostess"?? Obviously, you haven't flown on an airline since the Equal Opportunity Employment Act was passed, in 1977, when the designation was officially made, "Flight attendant". Prior to that, the term, "Stewardess" was common, but "Air hostess", is your own invention. Incidentally, the EOEA, is also the reason why they're no longer under 32 and single and, by virtue of seniority, the older flight attendants, male and female, are seen on the longer trans continental and overseas flights. Fewer flight segments, more rest, higher pay.
@@vincesbardella3838 Do you need to be so worked up about this? How about you laugh at the joke and let the rest of us wallow in our crippling ignorance.
@@danielgarcia9371 You go ahead and wallow away and I'll devote my old age to correcting said ignorance, whenever able.
He gets the male hostess to do it.
"To lessen the fear" they don't wan't you to know when the they set AP?
Hell they should play the AP disengage tone over the cabin PA together with the inevitable "wtf is it doing now?" in heavy turbulence. *That's* fear
I think people completely have the wrong idea of what the autopilot actually does. For the most part, it just maneuvers you to the altitude and heading of the vectors you've set, and then maintains it for as long as it's confident that it can do so reliably. If it detects any issues, turbulence, or traffic, it'll shut off and alert the pilots to resume full control. People seem to think that it's some majestic AI that takes over the entire plane and makes all the decisions for the entire flight while the pilots just sit back and "read a book" or "take a nap".
Hell, compared to a Tesla, the autopilot on an aircraft barely lives up to its name. Maybe the term "autonavigator" would be more accurate; it certainly doesn't replace the pilot/driver, unlike Tesla's Autopilot.
@@weblure yea like you'd think cruise control would give people the general idea that it's moreso helping you than doing everything itself
Lies! Everyone knows the AP is an inflatable pilot named “Otto!” 😁
I'm a regional guy. We make in the high 30k's. Great video by the way!
Have you considered Envoy? $50/hr and a flow through program.
@@McBoeingDrVr Well, they pay better than "high 30s" so... there's that.
@@CWLemoine I have actually, and may do that. Thank you for the thought.
@@CWLemoine Republic is another good one. 45+ i believe now, great work rules (which I personally find as important as pay rate)
@@p51pilot28 agreed. Work rules are huge.
I’m not a frequent flyer by any means, but I’m no stranger to flying. Probably been on about 40+ flights in my life and I have yet to have a rough flight. A few less than smooth landings, sure, and maybe some turbulence from time to time(completely normal) but every flight has been otherwise completely safe. Never even had a go around or gone into holding. I just don’t understand why some people are afraid of flying. It’s super safe, and these guys are real pros. Thanks for all you do and keeping us safe in the skies. I’m 33 and still love flying; that little kid in me never died. Always love that moment the pilot throttles up on the runway on takeoff and that point when you see the runway under you on landing.
I can't believe this was an actual article. Thanks, Mover!
Starting pilot school this Monday in Daytona🙌
Good luck!
Good luck
Embry riddle? ‘92 grad here.
astraflyr atp flight school
You know how to make a small fortune in aviation?
Start with a large one.
Pilot : Hey, I think we are having a 7500.
Flight Attendant : What's a 7500?
IDK..
awww..gone are the days when a kid such as i at 12 could be sitting in the left seat and make a turn toward Detroit. It was a Stratcruiser, as I recall...a thrill never to be forgotten.....and I'm fairly certain the statute of limitations has run....
When I was kid it was still common practice to invite all children to visit the cockpit. It was done during level flying but still an interesting experience to see different cockpits. I remember at least MD-11 and 747. I'm not sure if I visited any other as those were most common planes here.
@@suokkos "Pauli, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?"
@@talltroll7092 , Why?
@@suokkos Lol, go watch Airplane
@@talltroll7092 , Thanks. I haven't seen the movie. Now I at least have a better understanding where the comment comes.
15:47 "Dangerous because of uh... jesus"
lmao
Anyways thanks for making this video, i found that funny, but your videos are entertaining.
I travel extensively for work (Pre COVID-19) and I've heard and seen a lot in my time on an airplane. Turbulence so bad it tossed the beverage cart, go arounds, aborted take offs etc....Only one time has the Captian informed the plane of a maintenance issue. On a red eye from LAX to IND said a hydraic system was malfunctioning and we would be met on the runway by emergency gear and a rug to take us to the gate as there would be steering issues on the ground once we landed. I have confidence in the people flying in today's world. Thanks for the vids. I enjoy watching.
As a future airline pilot I surely hope I have the opportunity to say, "Hold onto your butts - it's going to get nasty."
I would pay to see the face of Karen's fear in that moment
17:57
tighten your kegals! Prison wallet your balls!
Is this a death wish
Mover! You need to review the comedy "Airplane" on your website!
"Suck with confidence. Lose with honor."
My house words.
10:10 if I’m pilot monitoring, I usually play Tetris on my phone because you can set it to “one finger” mode and just play it with your thumb, so you can always have another hand free to key up the mic
Excellent vid as usual sir. As a (longtime!) retired RAF pilot I certainly appreciate your very measured comments on the world of aviation. I look forward to the next instalments. Cheers from a (very IFR) Sevenoaks, Kent, UK.
What advice can you give to someone like me who's considering joining the U.S Air Force?
"passengers aren't mechanics"
Honestly as an aviation tech I don't want to know about any mechanical problems when i'm out traveling. I've had to fix enough sub par work to know that there are some birds I will refuse to fly on.
Just out of curiosity, what planes do you refuse to fly on? Or, if it's a long list, maybe just your top 5 or 10 to not fly on?
@@adamlarussa5243 Yeah!
10:13 I do remember a scandal involving Ryanair (of course). Now, I don't remember all the details but they had an internal ranking of pilots and the amount of gas they pumped into their flights. The airline set an average and if your average of gas ordered was higher than the general average (or average set by the airline) you'd get fired or get a warning. This got public when a Ryanair flight bound to Valencia had to reroute to Madrid due to bad weather. In Madrid, they were queued because of the huge influx of rerouted flights. The captain had to signal a distress call and state that they couldn't stay in the queue due to fuel shortage. Eventually, they could skip the queue and land safely. Hopefully this has been addressed by now!
Just to give a UK differences perspective.🇬🇧
Yes, we nap. Known as controlled rest, limited to 40 minutes at a time to prevent sleep inertia (look it up peeps). We fly up to around 8:30hrs with just two crew, not getting augmented crew until a flight is longer than that. Trying to stay awake through the night when tired carries a higher risk of falling asleep at a more inopportune time.
No, we don’t eat the same food as the passengers, and at least one pilot will have a different meal to the others on the flight deck. Our crew food is generally around a ‘business class’ standard. We certainly don’t get First Class food - eating lobster and caviar every day would soon get boring.
We don’t have rules regarding whether we read on the flight deck - an 11 hour flight gets pretty boring, there are only so many war stories you can swap!
Not just regionals - but you can end up on a different airline due code-sharing - we code share with American, Finnair, JAL and others.
Everything else is pretty much as you’ve summarised.👍🏻
First class is a bit of a euphemism on US airlines. With luck US first class food is on par with business on European airlines and with slightly nicer econ food on Asian ones.
To add to this:
First a video about the bunks on long haul flights: ruclips.net/video/1venL93QmXA/видео.html
And a video by a European pilot on the nap:
ruclips.net/video/aQSDZOZ0cJ0/видео.html
Thank you for your video. Here's one for you, I read that on long flights they have a secret chamber to put a dead body in case someone dies during a flight.
I really like your videos! Over here in Europe we indeed do have regulations on in flight napping. One example of how those rules might look: max 15 minutes to not fall in deep sleep, wake up latest 30min before top of descent and advise cabin crew so they check after the 15 minutes have elapsed.
"Suck with confidence" lmao
Every day of my life
"Spit with honour"
right ? same
This is gonna be a good one.
Admit it Captain, you do fly through the asteroid belt and you have run out of coffee.
Lol, so now if I ever see you in the terminal coming through the waiting area, I’m going to quickly stand and salute and loudly say “attention on deck”. Lol
"#2 They downplay any problems."
Pilot: Ladies and gentlemen, I don't want to alarm you back there but we're about to crash. And once again, we want to thank you for flying with us.