LOVE!!! I left my job 6 months ago (in mental health) and told management 'I can't pour from an empty cup'. I've been working part time and doing lots of art. I think you are the same type of person as I am. Deeply empathetic. Too caring for this world. I feel everything. I cry for people I don't even know. I have terribly anxiety and blood pressure issues as a result lol but people like us, Cheyenne, the world needs more of!!! At the end of the day, misery has always existed. We are here to add light, and a way, into existence for those that need help creating that light for themselves. I've always been told I care too much. And maybe I do. But I'd rather care too much than not at all. We just gotta focus that love onto where it's needed
I really appreciate you talking about how the state of the world has been affecting you. It's been affecting me too. I'm also in a position where I have a lot of privilages, but I also lack specific privilages that mean that i'm basically completely drowning in mental illness and can't really get myself out of it because I don't have the tools I need to do that. And i've been feeling really burnt out and resentful - because the intense effort I put into being alive and getting better feels meaningless; because of how aware I am of my suffering, other people's suffering, and the boundless nature of suffering in general; and because I feel like I have such a limited ability to create positive change. It's hard to fully recognize people's pain and feel like you're a drop in the bucket to undoing it. It's hard to recognize that about your own pain too. I truly feel like my cup is empty but feel angry at myself that I'm not pouring enough out. I feel guilty for the ways I struggle, and for the ways I don't. One thing that's been helping is a video It's Radish Time made called 'on helplessness' - and in it she talks about thinking about how we spend our energy. Not just the things we could be doing that we aren't (like ways to support our community) but also the things we are spending energy on that we don't _need_ to be. And I think for me, I've also been spending energy on a lot of self-loathing behaviours that just exacerbate suffering in my life. Instead of being compassionate towards my struggles, and using that compassion as a way to create more empathy for people who have greater struggles, I beat myself up, I invalidate my pain, and I decrease my ability to validate and understand other people's pain because i'm so caught up in my own. I'm starting to realize that minimizing my issues doesn't really help others, and in fact giving myself room to struggle allows me the ability to do that for others. Because the issues and bad feelings don't go away, even if you believe they shouldn't exist or you're too privilaged to have them. They just sit there and fester the more you beat yourself up over them, or punish yourself with them, the more they weigh you down, and the more they decrease your ability to support others. It's much more productive to care for yourself and use that as a model for how to care for others. I would also say in regards to the quote you gave - who I consider my Community are not necessarily the people who are directly around or in front of me, because those people are for the most part toxic, bigoted, and have a direct negative effect on my wellbeing (and I can't leave because ~mental illness~). And the only way I have found to positively interact with them is to minimize contact and put up boundaries. That's my personal caveat that I thought i'd add lol. Sometimes being mindful is supporting community that you align with to have a positive effect on society, and surviving the toxic people directly around you when mutual support is not possible with them.
really love the chat about pouring from an empty cup -- coming up with ways to give back is going to feel nearly impossible when you feel so overwhelmed by the huge things looming over us. but ultimately, starting small & focusing on your immediate community (family, friends, etc.) is such a nice way to look at it. it really hit home w/ me specifically because i think i've really dealt with this specific emotion & feeling so many times before -- we're artists just making art from our favorite things & sometimes it can feel so helpless in a world where everyone is struggling so much. after we developed the full comfort of loving each other (we're girlfriends!), we could focus on other things we cared about, which first ended up being animals & seeing even just the cats in our yards, in our neighborhoods, struggling so much. from there, we volunteered, we learned more about taking care of them, about the fundamental societal issues that lead to animal cruelty, to feral cats and the solutions that we can all do to help that. now it's 2022 & we're running a cat rescue while still creating our art --> our silly little art actually funds it & even when the world gets to be too much sometimes, looking back at these 'kids' (all our foster cats/kittens) that we're taking care of every day, it's a reminder that we're at least doing this, you know? we're still giving back to the world somehow or another, even if it's maybe not something as grand as running for office or whatever other huge thing there is to combat what's going on right now, haha... sorry if it's a bit tmi, but thank you for talking about it! i always appreciate whenever you talk about real things happening right now instead of sugarcoating it all. give back in the ways that feel most comfortable & natural to you! we all have something to offer to the people around us & personally, i see your vlogs & art as something you're sharing with us to give that little light to the world right now.
Thank you so much for this video - specifically the bit where you talk about how immobilizing it can be to want to do so much to help others, but have so little mental space to do so. This is something I’ve been trying to verbalize for so long, and I really appreciate you talking about it. “Why am I manufacturing my own misery?” I needed to hear that so bad. Thank you thank you thank you ❤️
Your "stupid little pictures" that you make (and they're not stupid btw) sparks joy and helps distract us from the craziness of the world around us. Your drawings bring a lot of love and joy to the world right now Cheyenne. You help people out more than you really know and I hope this can help remind you of the sheer tiny fraction of how much your community loves and supports you.
I've also been feeling so overwhelmed at the state of the world recently, the nihilism you described, I can totally relate too, but I still have hope ♥️ I'm glad you do too! Loved this vlog, you inspire me!😌
I have been struggling quite a bit lately, feeling weighed down and kind of lost, struggling with creativity and trying to be hopeful about every day life and the future. This really helped me feel like I could still get things sorted out. I'm probably going to rewatch this later and let it sink in again, and hopefully I can unravel the knots and tangles of my thoughts. Thank you for making this
Everything you said about the world lately and how you’re feeling resonated with me so much. You said it so beautifully that you need to maximize your own joy, I love that. Thank you for talking about this, it has really made me feel less alone and given me a new way to think about my own difficult feelings about the world lately. So glad I found your channel!!
As a person that is currently living in Ukraine 🇺🇦I have exactly the same thoughts! I am in Kyiv and it really goes back to normal life as much as it is possible in these circumstances, we get bombed just once or twice a month (I know it sounds silly😂). And we are constantly being blamed for forgetting about the war. But like, how can I work and donate to the army, how can I contribute to rebuilding our beautiful strong country if I am constantly stressed and “my cup is empty” now?
that lil scale degree 4-3-5-1 melody moment around 9:54-55 gave my lil musician heart so much joy, so thank u for this and the generally cozy vlog as always!!
I like your content 'cause you're one of the few creators who's not constantly showing clips of you receiveing packages, Amazon shopping, Aliexpress hauls or whatsoever. At first it's entertaining, but that kind of videos I believe (in a certain level) they cause more irrepsonsible consumption... I appreciate the fact you took some time to talk about the reality we're living right now in terms of enviromental issues. And you're acting in consequence, by re-thinking the way you consume, and the way you create. You're such a talented and inspiring woman 💕✨ Thanks
I know this video was posted a while ago but it's so crazy how my favorite artists' vlogs seem so timely and relatable when I watch them. Questioning your purpose in life and being overly sentimental/concerned about your aging cat, man I feel ya SO HARD. Murphy (my cat) is doing better and eating again but I've been crying about this silly sweet boy for like four days straight. I work in the environmental field but I still question if it's enough almost daily. June is also my birth month and I think that may partially account for ruminating about about my purpose and mortality of loved ones. My take away from the last couple months is caring is a great thing but I can't let it freak me out because that serves no one (including myself). Anyways thanks for sharing your thoughts, it's nice to know people with big hearts like you are out there and I'm glad you're taking care of yourself. If it's any consolation, you've made my hard days lately less difficult and brighter! 💗
I really needed to hear this today. I'm constantly feeling my hope dwindle and motivation dim. I want to be full again, and I think loving people sounds so simple, but goes so far. I feel a little aimless right now, but if I can do things that wake my heart and soul up a bit I think I'll be ok. Thank you for sharing how you're doing
As someone who deals with very similar thought processes this was indescribably helpful and it very nearly brought me to tears. Thankyou. I think I’ll come back here and listen to your monologue every time I get back into one of those ruts. (Also the multicolor nail polish is iconic xx)
My mood also plummets during sunny days (and living in Colorado, we have a lot of those!) Mine is anxiety/sensory overstimulation related, but I’ve never heard anyone else say they deal with the same thing with sunny weather specifically and I have the hardest time trying to explain it to folks if it comes up. So thank you for sharing that ☁️💜
I’m the same way. I get SAD but in the summer. It’s weird but that much sun/heat just feels super oppressive and it’s why I’m always at my healthiest/happiest in fall/winter. I really should be living in, like, Iceland or something. 😂
I have never been more happy seeing a vid in my RUclips feed, you ooze good vibes and joy, thanks for existing, may you always find happiness and joy because you deserve all what's good and sweet in the world.
for what it's worth, your work and your videos have always brought me a ton of joy! Thank you for letting us into your thoughts, they really resonated with me. (PS I also get bummed on sunny days and thrilled on rainy days! def a light-sensitivity thing, but also a cozy homebody thing. Plus it meant as a kid sports practices were cancelled, haha)
I love that you have two rescue black cats. I have a rescue black cat and she’s about 18 and very very poorly (nothing to be done) but still has kittenish moments and she purrs a lot and I’m hoping she never loses these things. Also, your art matters. It’s joy in a cute, colourful form and we all need more of that. Keep on keeping on x
Just began binge watching your videos. They've been giving me comfort and I love the talks and how you process your emotions and your creativity. Just living life. I want to pick up on that energy. Thank you for this! ❤️
As someone who works freelance and is currently in a weird hiatus-like state, the conversation about maximizing one's own joy and nourishing your spirit and community really hit home with me.
Hey, I've watched this a few times in the last month. Everything you've said resonates with me in a HUGE way. Keep making your videos, keep making your art and keep talking!
Hi Cheyenne! I have been following you for like several years now and watching you talk about mutual aid and the importance of caring for yourself to be able to contribute to your community really stuck with me and also made me realize how much impact you've had on my life. You have influenced me so much as an artist and I missed your content! happy to see you're feeling better :)
I really really appreciate you sharing your “breakthrough moment” of the sort of quote about there being too much stuff happening to be putting more stuff on yourself and creating your own misery. I like that. It shed some light on my mentality for the day as well. Thank you. 🤩
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, your worries and your joys. I’ve felt the ‘empty cup’ dilemma ever since my partner died last year (and also being bombarded by bad news because of my current job). I’m going to try and keep my own focus on moving forward, and somehow refilling my cup so I can have a better influence on those people whose lives still touch mine. Your videos always help me find calm, and some clarity, and just like your sticker I keep on my steering wheel, some direction back to the sunlight.
So lovely to sit down for a good ol Cheyenne vlog 💖 Died at Connor's "I threw up today," teared up with you about your phantom thief moment. The gallery wall is stunning!
Thank you Cheyenne for telling us about your breakthrough with thoughts on world doom. As others have already mentioned, this really gets to me too, but hearing you talk through it is very helpful. There is only so much we can do, but there is also so much we can do! Like you said, when we are in a healthy place ourselves, we can be a greater help to others. Xx
My dad always reminds me of the flight rule 'you put the mask on first before putting them on others'. (when there is pressure issue and the oxigen masks drop down) So true and I keep reminding myself of that! And I feel you on the overwhelmed feelings. Altough I think we creatives should keep creating in these dark times because for many out there, art was always a little island of light. We can stop for a moment to admire something that touches our soul. Whether it is a huge detailed oil painting or a silly little sketch.
thank you for sharing your moment of revelation with us! About the thought of "you cannot pour from an empty cup," i agree wholeheartedly! :-) I also like to remind myself that my cup deserves to be as full as I want others' cups to be! In other words, all the wonderful things you wish to give people are things you also deserve. You are part of the world you wish to give to
heyu chey! just gotta letchu know that you are legit a huge joy bringer in my life, ever since I first found and started watching your RUclips vids, my heart always bursts and melts whenever you share anything! I rly love and appreciate you and your art and your sensi gentleness and the way you see the world and express yourself is v inspiring and YA! always mighty dig your company!!! thanks for being buddy. excited for what's to come and sending you so so much SQUISH!!!
Someone once told me that just like how doctors, lawyers and engineers feed the "body" of society by literally fixing/amending/maintaining things that are often tangible, artists, musicians, designers and story tellers feed the society's soul. Without art & culture, we'd die as a society. And I found much comfort in pursuing my career because I just wanted to be of use to the people around me with what I can do best / the calling in life I was given. I hope you feel the same because you nourish a lot of viewers and art appreciators who go through a bad day and don't know how to express it. You do more than you think! sending lots of love and warm wishes.
me too... the state of the world has been putting a huge "but why" over everything for me lately. even making my own art. but then i see other people's art and i am within a moment of relief from it all, and that's what i've realised i'm giving to the world while i give to myself as well. i'm giving a place to rest your tired eyes for a moment. somewhere soft, sparkly, comfortable, and welcoming. somewhere warm, and gentle, and at ease. amongst the disturbance and destruction on your news feed. and when i realise how badly i'm needing that from others at the moment, it makes me want to make more. draw more, paint more, take photos of more. because i can't, in a world with over 8 billion people, be the only one longing for more space between the noise. love to you + connor + kitties. your little family brightens my world a little every time you post. and i'm so grateful for that. xo
I'm at the bit where you're talking about mutual aid and having a sense of purpose and i just want to say, you are so lovely!!! thanks so much for these videos i always get some comfort and joy out of them, you're such an inspiration to me
This was such a great little bit bc it’s exactly how I’ve been feeling. I have a lot of privileges and yet my brain still freaks out on an almost-daily basis. I have to put down my phone and physically enter into another activity just to avoid doom-scrolling and force myself to engage with things I love doing.
Ugh, I definitely started crying when you started crying and didn't stop for a while. This is exactly what I needed to hear too. Thank you for sharing.
i just wanted to say how comforting i find your videos!! 💛 thank you for being so wonderful, i know it’s rlly hard existing with how the world is going right now and i just wanted you to know your presence and art are greatly appreciated! i know i’m commenting a month late but i hope you are still doing well and that you, connor and the kitties are having a wonderful day! 💫
As a MOA(TXT fan) and a long time subscriber of yours I literally teared up when you said you listen to their new song!! excuse my dramatic response but oh my god thank you so much cheyenne this crumb just made my day :")
It's so funny when nothing in our lives has changed in the grand scheme of things but our perspectives completely change so everything feels really intense and different with our newfound outlook on life.
I have been felling the same way. I left art school in 2019 and I have not done anything creative since. I have constantly had this feeling of was that time and effort worth it. And 3 years later I'm still lost and still asking myself what's the point? I'm stuck in this horrible and draining mindset and I don't know how to get back in to drawing for myself and feeling proud of what I create. You have triggered something in my brain that's made me think that I am the empty cup and I'm pouring my heart out in wanting to create but nothing is coming out. And not only that you have made me realise I am a cup that is worth filling ( if you get me). Now I just need to figure out how to fill my cup. hopefully this is the beginning of creative success? Sorry for the waffling on, I hope I make sense.
Just wanted to say I really relate to this! I went to school for creative writing (and other things) but haven't done anything related to that professionally or personally for like 3 years, partially due to mental illness. I don't necessarily want to write professionally but it really hurts knowing how much I struggle even doing it personally, like the joy I had for writing was wrung out of me to finish my degree, and I have nothing left. I've been trying to jump start some projects and validating that they're just for me and can be as messy and bad as I need them to be because the point is to engage with my creativity and just allow myself to explore without pressure or expectations. But i've realized that's really hard to do, and I have a huge self-critic that hates on me every time I try to have fun and create that makes it literally painful for me to write even a couple of paragraphs. Still trying to make baby steps in that department, but I wish you luck in the same! We can do this. It only has to be a step at a time. I'm also still trying to figure out how to fill my cup, and that can be challenging as well.
love this video, chey! I like watching parts of the vlog throughout the week when i have the time. Brightens my day! side note - connor types so fast!!
Okay but your colouring and framing during the segment where you talk to the camera (very insightful btw) was SO nice, I tend to switch tabs when it's just nattering - usually to art refs - but I kept this one because it's just so aesthetically charming! Also "that's not very phantom thief of you" is perfect and I need to put it my day to day now! I finally played it last year after hearing you and other hype it up and honestly I forgot to romance anyone (I kept being RESPECTFUL in my responses which meant we were 'just friends' dangit) but honestly I'm feeling the Joker/Ryuji and/or Joker/Yusuke vibes throughout. I love how much you love Sophie and you having a natter with Pepper was adorable ;; Lovely video as ever!
LET ME KISS MY BROS ATLUS!!!! YOU COWARDS!!!! but, if the actual romanceable options, makoto is best girl ❣️❣️❣️ and ty re: the framing! i was so happy with that shot x
I have been on a what I call "art purgatory" for a while where I don't know what to do with my art and how to move forward, I'm midway through your video as well as your monologue relevant to this and would just like to say thank you so much because most of what you vocalized resonated with me and sort of shifted something in my mindset. I don't know what to do with this energy yet but I feel like I at least have a place to start!
ALSO - I thought you'd like this quote, Chey. I believe it comes from Mother Teresa (who to my knowledge wasn't actually that great of a person, but it still stands as a piece of wisdom): *_'We can't all do great things, but we can do small things with great love'._* I really love that it directly challenges my all or nothing thinking, and desire to sink into apathy because I can't fix all the world's problems and most of what I _can_ do seems miniscule. It's hard to want to create change when so much is out of our control, and so many issues are caused and can be fixed by people who have power but fundamentally do not care. But like you said, we all have our small circle of influence, and we can all do things to improve the livelihoods of the people around us. Small, individual and community based actions can't fix everything, and we shouldn't pretend like they can (especially relevant with the climate crisis). But we are still not exempt from doing what we can with what we have, just because what we have doesn't always feel like enough. It might not be enough to fix _everything_ or even most things, but that doesn't mean it's meaningless. (And obviously this doesn't discount the opportunities we might have to do big things - when we come across them, we should 100% act. We just don't always have that opportunity, and shouldn't wait for it to come along to do things).
Lovely, lovely you! I always enjoy hearing you talk, either just rambles or 'revelations'. Hearing you talk about keeping your cup full made something click in me too. Thank you! You always inspire me. Hälsningar från Sverige, hoppas du hittar hit i sommar
420 BLAZE IT lol but I wanted to say that I haven't watched one of our videos in a second and im glad I watched this one. community is key and I hope you keep this energy because taking care of yourself is really the first step to taking care of community. love ya and hope you been doing good and had a good birthday and pride
The part abt phantom thief and meaning was exactly what i needed to hear. I really wany, like you, to use what privilege i have, to affect local community and change things, but also like you said, you cant pour from an empty cup. I have hard time recognizing that i do lot already and i keep expecting more of me even when theres nothing else to give. But i do enough. And i need rest before i can continue. And thats ok.
Instead of using a mug warmer, when you get your tea pop it in a thermos or other insulated bottle. It will be the perfect temp for much longer, even if you forget!
I have a thermos-coffee cup hybrid and it is wonderful, has the typical lid you would expect to see on a to-go cup but it seals, fits in a cup holder and has a handle 😍
totally agree about the new season of love death and robots!! it wasn’t what i had been expecting from the show, so i ended up just playing the rest in the background :(
Dude I was a full time artist pre covid and I so deeply relate to the wtf am I doing when x is happening and it was heavyyy. I had to step out and be a part time barista so I could press the release button on my pressure cooker heart. im grateful to witness your process as it helps me figure out mine too
Happy Birthday Gemini! I am one too! Communnty-wise I am organizing an event that I dreamt up last year in my town. It is an Upcycled Planter Challenge where over 30 people including myself create planters from recycled objects. The planters are place all around town and on our town green for two weeks. People vote on their favorite, AND can bid on one to buy in our online auction. The funds raised go to upgrade Monarch habitats that were planted in our town in 2016. A lot of the planters are amazing!
Amazing video. Love hearing about your (our) mutual interests: kpop, persona, love death & robots (you have excellent taste and I totally agree with you!). But beyond that it's great seeing your vulnerable thoughts and feelings about this crazy world. Making small differences in our personal lives and with the people/community around us is where we can find the most comfort and strength. Thanks for the update, I look forward to hearing from you every time!
I’ve also been dealing with the same feelings this past year and idk if this is true for you too but I’ve struggled with guilt over being privileged and yet still wanting more for myself and my family (I’m not rich by any means, I’m actually on welfare lol but I just mean in comparison to most humans on earth today!) But I realized that the feelings of guilt and shame can’t absolve me of my privilege and I can’t atone for being able to live a comfortable life by torturing myself with the horrible realities of others. I’m not saying I want to stick my head in the sand but there’s a difference between being informed/not ignorant and being overwhelmed and debilitated by negative news. All this is to say, I get what you mean and I’m also trying to fill my own cup so I can lift up my loved ones and my community! Yay for self care 🥰
Your dialogue about nihilism and the state of the world really reminds me of Everything Everywhere All At Once. I think it's a movie that encapsulates the maximalist lives we live, where everything is vying for our attention and there's just not enough time nor energy to devote to all of those things. Nihilism and absurdism play key roles in the movie and I think your epiphany really matches up with the theme and message of that movie: that while nothing matters in this world, that it will go to shit anyways, this blank slate is almost a way to free yourself from a universal meaning-making to forge your own personal goals and wants in life and create the relationships we find worth continue living in the confusing and crushing world we do.
I felt the same despair recently and doubted the value of this existence with the war being an immediate threat and climate change being pushed back in my brain a bit, tho I still recycle lol. And honestly I'm glad you had this breakthrough and keep pushing and doing your personal best. For me personally your, as you called them "stupid lil pictures", bring a lot of joy and watching this vlog calmed me down. Gave me this necessary feeling of normalcy I lack so much in times of immediate danger and constant stress. It's a bridge that connects me to life I lost because of cruelty of some and passiveness of others, but life I will have enough mental capacity and agency to take back. Partially thanks to art I consider mental health boosting haha. Your brain worms is the only reality you have and I'm happy you keep fighting your inner battles and I'll try my best to keep fighting mine.
I really get what you mean with the bad state of the world and how things don't matter, I used to be extremely eco-friendly/vegan/... but now I'm a bit more loose because it's so hard to take in mind everything ever and be perfect :') I'm neurodivergent as well and this seems very relatable (because I know a lot of super sensitive autistic/adhd people feeling the load of the world), but I tried to be more positive in life and I've seen a big improvement. I try to keep busy and be thankful every day, and try to make other people their life a little bit better in my silly little way. You also don't really notice how much your work ACTUALLY DOES matter to other people :) For me it does!!
I had to pause and type this comment of course so I didn't hear everything you said afterwards hahahah, but I'm happy you're feeling better about it now
Such a lovely chat time, really felt your words and just wanted to give you a big hug ❤️ So happy for your epiphany, makes so much sense, top up that cup 🥰 I’ve download the miracle of mindfulness to listen to now 😊. Ps 4:20 hehe 😜
LOVE!!! I left my job 6 months ago (in mental health) and told management 'I can't pour from an empty cup'. I've been working part time and doing lots of art. I think you are the same type of person as I am. Deeply empathetic. Too caring for this world. I feel everything. I cry for people I don't even know. I have terribly anxiety and blood pressure issues as a result lol but people like us, Cheyenne, the world needs more of!!! At the end of the day, misery has always existed. We are here to add light, and a way, into existence for those that need help creating that light for themselves.
I've always been told I care too much. And maybe I do. But I'd rather care too much than not at all. We just gotta focus that love onto where it's needed
I really appreciate you talking about how the state of the world has been affecting you. It's been affecting me too. I'm also in a position where I have a lot of privilages, but I also lack specific privilages that mean that i'm basically completely drowning in mental illness and can't really get myself out of it because I don't have the tools I need to do that. And i've been feeling really burnt out and resentful - because the intense effort I put into being alive and getting better feels meaningless; because of how aware I am of my suffering, other people's suffering, and the boundless nature of suffering in general; and because I feel like I have such a limited ability to create positive change. It's hard to fully recognize people's pain and feel like you're a drop in the bucket to undoing it. It's hard to recognize that about your own pain too. I truly feel like my cup is empty but feel angry at myself that I'm not pouring enough out. I feel guilty for the ways I struggle, and for the ways I don't.
One thing that's been helping is a video It's Radish Time made called 'on helplessness' - and in it she talks about thinking about how we spend our energy. Not just the things we could be doing that we aren't (like ways to support our community) but also the things we are spending energy on that we don't _need_ to be. And I think for me, I've also been spending energy on a lot of self-loathing behaviours that just exacerbate suffering in my life. Instead of being compassionate towards my struggles, and using that compassion as a way to create more empathy for people who have greater struggles, I beat myself up, I invalidate my pain, and I decrease my ability to validate and understand other people's pain because i'm so caught up in my own.
I'm starting to realize that minimizing my issues doesn't really help others, and in fact giving myself room to struggle allows me the ability to do that for others. Because the issues and bad feelings don't go away, even if you believe they shouldn't exist or you're too privilaged to have them. They just sit there and fester the more you beat yourself up over them, or punish yourself with them, the more they weigh you down, and the more they decrease your ability to support others. It's much more productive to care for yourself and use that as a model for how to care for others.
I would also say in regards to the quote you gave - who I consider my Community are not necessarily the people who are directly around or in front of me, because those people are for the most part toxic, bigoted, and have a direct negative effect on my wellbeing (and I can't leave because ~mental illness~). And the only way I have found to positively interact with them is to minimize contact and put up boundaries. That's my personal caveat that I thought i'd add lol. Sometimes being mindful is supporting community that you align with to have a positive effect on society, and surviving the toxic people directly around you when mutual support is not possible with them.
Thanks for sharing, this is helpful
really love the chat about pouring from an empty cup -- coming up with ways to give back is going to feel nearly impossible when you feel so overwhelmed by the huge things looming over us. but ultimately, starting small & focusing on your immediate community (family, friends, etc.) is such a nice way to look at it.
it really hit home w/ me specifically because i think i've really dealt with this specific emotion & feeling so many times before -- we're artists just making art from our favorite things & sometimes it can feel so helpless in a world where everyone is struggling so much. after we developed the full comfort of loving each other (we're girlfriends!), we could focus on other things we cared about, which first ended up being animals & seeing even just the cats in our yards, in our neighborhoods, struggling so much. from there, we volunteered, we learned more about taking care of them, about the fundamental societal issues that lead to animal cruelty, to feral cats and the solutions that we can all do to help that.
now it's 2022 & we're running a cat rescue while still creating our art --> our silly little art actually funds it & even when the world gets to be too much sometimes, looking back at these 'kids' (all our foster cats/kittens) that we're taking care of every day, it's a reminder that we're at least doing this, you know? we're still giving back to the world somehow or another, even if it's maybe not something as grand as running for office or whatever other huge thing there is to combat what's going on right now, haha...
sorry if it's a bit tmi, but thank you for talking about it! i always appreciate whenever you talk about real things happening right now instead of sugarcoating it all.
give back in the ways that feel most comfortable & natural to you! we all have something to offer to the people around us & personally, i see your vlogs & art as something you're sharing with us to give that little light to the world right now.
Thank you so much for this video - specifically the bit where you talk about how immobilizing it can be to want to do so much to help others, but have so little mental space to do so. This is something I’ve been trying to verbalize for so long, and I really appreciate you talking about it. “Why am I manufacturing my own misery?” I needed to hear that so bad. Thank you thank you thank you ❤️
Your "stupid little pictures" that you make (and they're not stupid btw) sparks joy and helps distract us from the craziness of the world around us. Your drawings bring a lot of love and joy to the world right now Cheyenne. You help people out more than you really know and I hope this can help remind you of the sheer tiny fraction of how much your community loves and supports you.
I've also been feeling so overwhelmed at the state of the world recently, the nihilism you described, I can totally relate too, but I still have hope ♥️ I'm glad you do too! Loved this vlog, you inspire me!😌
Not sure why, but Connor’s update made me giggle. I love how he is always just ready to share with the vlog instead of hiding 😂
I have been struggling quite a bit lately, feeling weighed down and kind of lost, struggling with creativity and trying to be hopeful about every day life and the future. This really helped me feel like I could still get things sorted out. I'm probably going to rewatch this later and let it sink in again, and hopefully I can unravel the knots and tangles of my thoughts. Thank you for making this
i cried when you cried. this felt so safe to watch. thank you for creating a space on the internet for hope.
Everything you said about the world lately and how you’re feeling resonated with me so much. You said it so beautifully that you need to maximize your own joy, I love that. Thank you for talking about this, it has really made me feel less alone and given me a new way to think about my own difficult feelings about the world lately. So glad I found your channel!!
As a person that is currently living in Ukraine 🇺🇦I have exactly the same thoughts! I am in Kyiv and it really goes back to normal life as much as it is possible in these circumstances, we get bombed just once or twice a month (I know it sounds silly😂). And we are constantly being blamed for forgetting about the war. But like, how can I work and donate to the army, how can I contribute to rebuilding our beautiful strong country if I am constantly stressed and “my cup is empty” now?
that lil scale degree 4-3-5-1 melody moment around 9:54-55 gave my lil musician heart so much joy, so thank u for this and the generally cozy vlog as always!!
I like your content 'cause you're one of the few creators who's not constantly showing clips of you receiveing packages, Amazon shopping, Aliexpress hauls or whatsoever. At first it's entertaining, but that kind of videos I believe (in a certain level) they cause more irrepsonsible consumption...
I appreciate the fact you took some time to talk about the reality we're living right now in terms of enviromental issues. And you're acting in consequence, by re-thinking the way you consume, and the way you create.
You're such a talented and inspiring woman 💕✨
Thanks
I know this video was posted a while ago but it's so crazy how my favorite artists' vlogs seem so timely and relatable when I watch them. Questioning your purpose in life and being overly sentimental/concerned about your aging cat, man I feel ya SO HARD. Murphy (my cat) is doing better and eating again but I've been crying about this silly sweet boy for like four days straight. I work in the environmental field but I still question if it's enough almost daily. June is also my birth month and I think that may partially account for ruminating about about my purpose and mortality of loved ones. My take away from the last couple months is caring is a great thing but I can't let it freak me out because that serves no one (including myself). Anyways thanks for sharing your thoughts, it's nice to know people with big hearts like you are out there and I'm glad you're taking care of yourself. If it's any consolation, you've made my hard days lately less difficult and brighter! 💗
I really needed to hear this today. I'm constantly feeling my hope dwindle and motivation dim. I want to be full again, and I think loving people sounds so simple, but goes so far. I feel a little aimless right now, but if I can do things that wake my heart and soul up a bit I think I'll be ok. Thank you for sharing how you're doing
As someone who deals with very similar thought processes this was indescribably helpful and it very nearly brought me to tears. Thankyou. I think I’ll come back here and listen to your monologue every time I get back into one of those ruts. (Also the multicolor nail polish is iconic xx)
My mood also plummets during sunny days (and living in Colorado, we have a lot of those!) Mine is anxiety/sensory overstimulation related, but I’ve never heard anyone else say they deal with the same thing with sunny weather specifically and I have the hardest time trying to explain it to folks if it comes up. So thank you for sharing that ☁️💜
I’m the same way. I get SAD but in the summer. It’s weird but that much sun/heat just feels super oppressive and it’s why I’m always at my healthiest/happiest in fall/winter.
I really should be living in, like, Iceland or something. 😂
I have never been more happy seeing a vid in my RUclips feed, you ooze good vibes and joy, thanks for existing, may you always find happiness and joy because you deserve all what's good and sweet in the world.
for what it's worth, your work and your videos have always brought me a ton of joy! Thank you for letting us into your thoughts, they really resonated with me. (PS I also get bummed on sunny days and thrilled on rainy days! def a light-sensitivity thing, but also a cozy homebody thing. Plus it meant as a kid sports practices were cancelled, haha)
I love that you have two rescue black cats. I have a rescue black cat and she’s about 18 and very very poorly (nothing to be done) but still has kittenish moments and she purrs a lot and I’m hoping she never loses these things.
Also, your art matters. It’s joy in a cute, colourful form and we all need more of that. Keep on keeping on x
Just began binge watching your videos. They've been giving me comfort and I love the talks and how you process your emotions and your creativity. Just living life. I want to pick up on that energy. Thank you for this! ❤️
As someone who works freelance and is currently in a weird hiatus-like state, the conversation about maximizing one's own joy and nourishing your spirit and community really hit home with me.
Hey, I've watched this a few times in the last month. Everything you've said resonates with me in a HUGE way. Keep making your videos, keep making your art and keep talking!
Hi Cheyenne! I have been following you for like several years now and watching you talk about mutual aid and the importance of caring for yourself to be able to contribute to your community really stuck with me and also made me realize how much impact you've had on my life. You have influenced me so much as an artist and I missed your content! happy to see you're feeling better :)
I really really appreciate you sharing your “breakthrough moment” of the sort of quote about there being too much stuff happening to be putting more stuff on yourself and creating your own misery. I like that. It shed some light on my mentality for the day as well. Thank you. 🤩
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, your worries and your joys. I’ve felt the ‘empty cup’ dilemma ever since my partner died last year (and also being bombarded by bad news because of my current job). I’m going to try and keep my own focus on moving forward, and somehow refilling my cup so I can have a better influence on those people whose lives still touch mine. Your videos always help me find calm, and some clarity, and just like your sticker I keep on my steering wheel, some direction back to the sunlight.
When you said you're full of new vigor now, my eyes filled up with happiness, just as you started to cry...I really felt that, and we all need it xx
Your video gave me a big boost today when I was needing it most!💕 Thanks for creating, & using your resources to lift up the community!🥰
So lovely to sit down for a good ol Cheyenne vlog 💖 Died at Connor's "I threw up today," teared up with you about your phantom thief moment. The gallery wall is stunning!
Thank you Cheyenne for telling us about your breakthrough with thoughts on world doom. As others have already mentioned, this really gets to me too, but hearing you talk through it is very helpful. There is only so much we can do, but there is also so much we can do! Like you said, when we are in a healthy place ourselves, we can be a greater help to others. Xx
My dad always reminds me of the flight rule 'you put the mask on first before putting them on others'. (when there is pressure issue and the oxigen masks drop down) So true and I keep reminding myself of that!
And I feel you on the overwhelmed feelings. Altough I think we creatives should keep creating in these dark times because for many out there, art was always a little island of light. We can stop for a moment to admire something that touches our soul. Whether it is a huge detailed oil painting or a silly little sketch.
thank you for sharing your moment of revelation with us! About the thought of "you cannot pour from an empty cup," i agree wholeheartedly! :-) I also like to remind myself that my cup deserves to be as full as I want others' cups to be! In other words, all the wonderful things you wish to give people are things you also deserve. You are part of the world you wish to give to
heyu chey! just gotta letchu know that you are legit a huge joy bringer in my life, ever since I first found and started watching your RUclips vids, my heart always bursts and melts whenever you share anything! I rly love and appreciate you and your art and your sensi gentleness and the way you see the world and express yourself is v inspiring and YA! always mighty dig your company!!! thanks for being buddy. excited for what's to come and sending you so so much SQUISH!!!
Someone once told me that just like how doctors, lawyers and engineers feed the "body" of society by literally fixing/amending/maintaining things that are often tangible, artists, musicians, designers and story tellers feed the society's soul. Without art & culture, we'd die as a society. And I found much comfort in pursuing my career because I just wanted to be of use to the people around me with what I can do best / the calling in life I was given. I hope you feel the same because you nourish a lot of viewers and art appreciators who go through a bad day and don't know how to express it. You do more than you think! sending lots of love and warm wishes.
me too... the state of the world has been putting a huge "but why" over everything for me lately. even making my own art. but then i see other people's art and i am within a moment of relief from it all, and that's what i've realised i'm giving to the world while i give to myself as well. i'm giving a place to rest your tired eyes for a moment. somewhere soft, sparkly, comfortable, and welcoming. somewhere warm, and gentle, and at ease. amongst the disturbance and destruction on your news feed. and when i realise how badly i'm needing that from others at the moment, it makes me want to make more. draw more, paint more, take photos of more. because i can't, in a world with over 8 billion people, be the only one longing for more space between the noise. love to you + connor + kitties. your little family brightens my world a little every time you post. and i'm so grateful for that. xo
thanks chey for coming back and saving this year🥹🥹 i look up to you soo muchh and you are such and icon😌
I'm at the bit where you're talking about mutual aid and having a sense of purpose and i just want to say, you are so lovely!!! thanks so much for these videos i always get some comfort and joy out of them, you're such an inspiration to me
This was such a great little bit bc it’s exactly how I’ve been feeling. I have a lot of privileges and yet my brain still freaks out on an almost-daily basis. I have to put down my phone and physically enter into another activity just to avoid doom-scrolling and force myself to engage with things I love doing.
You’re so sweet! Sending you hugs, thanks for being so vulnerable… you inspire me 💜
Ugh, I definitely started crying when you started crying and didn't stop for a while. This is exactly what I needed to hear too. Thank you for sharing.
i think this is the first time i've ever watched a video of yours and I'm already in love with the chaos ahah
i just wanted to say how comforting i find your videos!! 💛 thank you for being so wonderful, i know it’s rlly hard existing with how the world is going right now and i just wanted you to know your presence and art are greatly appreciated! i know i’m commenting a month late but i hope you are still doing well and that you, connor and the kitties are having a wonderful day! 💫
As a MOA(TXT fan) and a long time subscriber of yours I literally teared up when you said you listen to their new song!! excuse my dramatic response but oh my god thank you so much cheyenne this crumb just made my day :")
RIGHT?? It was so cute she stans TXT hehe
It's so funny when nothing in our lives has changed in the grand scheme of things but our perspectives completely change so everything feels really intense and different with our newfound outlook on life.
Drinking boba and watching Cheyenne
This video convinced me to finally try out Persona 5, also a mug warmer is an essential tool for those with ADHD (like me), keep it!!
I have been felling the same way. I left art school in 2019 and I have not done anything creative since. I have constantly had this feeling of was that time and effort worth it.
And 3 years later I'm still lost and still asking myself what's the point? I'm stuck in this horrible and draining mindset and I don't know how to get back in to drawing
for myself and feeling proud of what I create. You have triggered something in my brain that's made me think that I am the empty cup and I'm pouring my heart out in wanting to create
but nothing is coming out. And not only that you have made me realise I am a cup that is worth filling ( if you get me). Now I just need to figure out how to fill my cup. hopefully this is the beginning of creative success? Sorry for the waffling on, I hope I make sense.
Just wanted to say I really relate to this! I went to school for creative writing (and other things) but haven't done anything related to that professionally or personally for like 3 years, partially due to mental illness. I don't necessarily want to write professionally but it really hurts knowing how much I struggle even doing it personally, like the joy I had for writing was wrung out of me to finish my degree, and I have nothing left. I've been trying to jump start some projects and validating that they're just for me and can be as messy and bad as I need them to be because the point is to engage with my creativity and just allow myself to explore without pressure or expectations. But i've realized that's really hard to do, and I have a huge self-critic that hates on me every time I try to have fun and create that makes it literally painful for me to write even a couple of paragraphs. Still trying to make baby steps in that department, but I wish you luck in the same! We can do this. It only has to be a step at a time. I'm also still trying to figure out how to fill my cup, and that can be challenging as well.
@@Lisa_Flowers we got this!!!!
You posting something always brightens my day, so you’re already making a difference ❤️❤️
For the next 34 minutes and 34 seconds my soul will be comforted. Thank you Chey! Your vlogs always find me in times of need
love this video, chey! I like watching parts of the vlog throughout the week when i have the time. Brightens my day!
side note - connor types so fast!!
That sweater you had on throughout the video is just fantastic
Okay but your colouring and framing during the segment where you talk to the camera (very insightful btw) was SO nice, I tend to switch tabs when it's just nattering - usually to art refs - but I kept this one because it's just so aesthetically charming!
Also "that's not very phantom thief of you" is perfect and I need to put it my day to day now! I finally played it last year after hearing you and other hype it up and honestly I forgot to romance anyone (I kept being RESPECTFUL in my responses which meant we were 'just friends' dangit) but honestly I'm feeling the Joker/Ryuji and/or Joker/Yusuke vibes throughout.
I love how much you love Sophie and you having a natter with Pepper was adorable ;;
Lovely video as ever!
LET ME KISS MY BROS ATLUS!!!! YOU COWARDS!!!!
but, if the actual romanceable options, makoto is best girl ❣️❣️❣️ and ty re: the framing! i was so happy with that shot x
I have been on a what I call "art purgatory" for a while where I don't know what to do with my art and how to move forward, I'm midway through your video as well as your monologue relevant to this and would just like to say thank you so much because most of what you vocalized resonated with me and sort of shifted something in my mindset. I don't know what to do with this energy yet but I feel like I at least have a place to start!
ALSO - I thought you'd like this quote, Chey. I believe it comes from Mother Teresa (who to my knowledge wasn't actually that great of a person, but it still stands as a piece of wisdom):
*_'We can't all do great things, but we can do small things with great love'._*
I really love that it directly challenges my all or nothing thinking, and desire to sink into apathy because I can't fix all the world's problems and most of what I _can_ do seems miniscule. It's hard to want to create change when so much is out of our control, and so many issues are caused and can be fixed by people who have power but fundamentally do not care. But like you said, we all have our small circle of influence, and we can all do things to improve the livelihoods of the people around us. Small, individual and community based actions can't fix everything, and we shouldn't pretend like they can (especially relevant with the climate crisis). But we are still not exempt from doing what we can with what we have, just because what we have doesn't always feel like enough. It might not be enough to fix _everything_ or even most things, but that doesn't mean it's meaningless. (And obviously this doesn't discount the opportunities we might have to do big things - when we come across them, we should 100% act. We just don't always have that opportunity, and shouldn't wait for it to come along to do things).
Lovely, lovely you! I always enjoy hearing you talk, either just rambles or 'revelations'. Hearing you talk about keeping your cup full made something click in me too. Thank you! You always inspire me. Hälsningar från Sverige, hoppas du hittar hit i sommar
420 BLAZE IT lol but I wanted to say that I haven't watched one of our videos in a second and im glad I watched this one. community is key and I hope you keep this energy because taking care of yourself is really the first step to taking care of community. love ya and hope you been doing good and had a good birthday and pride
This was so lovely it warmed my heart. I literally sat here smiling the whole time:)
I clicked on this video and instantly breathed a sigh of relief. Thank you for making my days better!
This video was SO GOOD to watch! Sending lots of love 💕
I often feel the same way about the sunshine!
AHHHHHH, I get so excited for new videos on your channel!! Thank you for posting them. It always make me feel warm and happy. Love you content!!
The part abt phantom thief and meaning was exactly what i needed to hear. I really wany, like you, to use what privilege i have, to affect local community and change things, but also like you said, you cant pour from an empty cup. I have hard time recognizing that i do lot already and i keep expecting more of me even when theres nothing else to give. But i do enough. And i need rest before i can continue. And thats ok.
Always love watching your videos, makes me smile and giggle and overall good vibes 💕
Sooo excited to watch this while I’m working! A five star video as always ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Instead of using a mug warmer, when you get your tea pop it in a thermos or other insulated bottle. It will be the perfect temp for much longer, even if you forget!
I have a thermos-coffee cup hybrid and it is wonderful, has the typical lid you would expect to see on a to-go cup but it seals, fits in a cup holder and has a handle 😍
Your monologue was so relatable! And helpful. Thank you for sharing!
This is for sure the earliest I’ve been, lets go
totally agree about the new season of love death and robots!! it wasn’t what i had been expecting from the show, so i ended up just playing the rest in the background :(
THE WAY I IMMEDIATELY SCREAMED WHEN YOU MENTIONED TXT, GOT7, AND PH1 HELL YES! We love it hehe 💓💓
We need that kpop playlist! I'm googling them as you mention them 👀❤️ thanks for the recs!
thanks for your little chat I've been feeling the same way too it was nice to see that its possible to get outta that funk thanks for sharing
I swear, it’s your video notifications that make my heart kick flip summersault high five into a happy place 🌞
I've been feeling the same way. Thank you for sharing your realizations!
I saw the croched zipper pouch you had made for one of the other illustrators and I loved it.
obsessed with you 🥺🧡
I feel the same way about the gloomy weather! It makes me feel ok about being a lump inside.
AAA SO EXCITED U STARTED LISTENING TO P1H!!
Dude I was a full time artist pre covid and I so deeply relate to the wtf am I doing when x is happening and it was heavyyy. I had to step out and be a part time barista so I could press the release button on my pressure cooker heart. im grateful to witness your process as it helps me figure out mine too
here for the txt praise because youre absolutely right and you should say it
loveliest vlog as always!! so excited that i've just started a new job so i can finally join your patreon !!
Happy Birthday Gemini! I am one too! Communnty-wise I am organizing an event that I dreamt up last year in my town. It is an Upcycled Planter Challenge where over 30 people including myself create planters from recycled objects. The planters are place all around town and on our town green for two weeks. People vote on their favorite, AND can bid on one to buy in our online auction. The funds raised go to upgrade Monarch habitats that were planted in our town in 2016. A lot of the planters are amazing!
Amazing video. Love hearing about your (our) mutual interests: kpop, persona, love death & robots (you have excellent taste and I totally agree with you!). But beyond that it's great seeing your vulnerable thoughts and feelings about this crazy world. Making small differences in our personal lives and with the people/community around us is where we can find the most comfort and strength. Thanks for the update, I look forward to hearing from you every time!
This video made me smile 😊 Thank you!
That was sooooo nice to watch. Wow love it
I’ve also been dealing with the same feelings this past year and idk if this is true for you too but I’ve struggled with guilt over being privileged and yet still wanting more for myself and my family (I’m not rich by any means, I’m actually on welfare lol but I just mean in comparison to most humans on earth today!) But I realized that the feelings of guilt and shame can’t absolve me of my privilege and I can’t atone for being able to live a comfortable life by torturing myself with the horrible realities of others. I’m not saying I want to stick my head in the sand but there’s a difference between being informed/not ignorant and being overwhelmed and debilitated by negative news. All this is to say, I get what you mean and I’m also trying to fill my own cup so I can lift up my loved ones and my community! Yay for self care 🥰
Lovely vlog as always💕
Your dialogue about nihilism and the state of the world really reminds me of Everything Everywhere All At Once. I think it's a movie that encapsulates the maximalist lives we live, where everything is vying for our attention and there's just not enough time nor energy to devote to all of those things. Nihilism and absurdism play key roles in the movie and I think your epiphany really matches up with the theme and message of that movie: that while nothing matters in this world, that it will go to shit anyways, this blank slate is almost a way to free yourself from a universal meaning-making to forge your own personal goals and wants in life and create the relationships we find worth continue living in the confusing and crushing world we do.
we love you so much chey :(
People like you spark Joy in others. That is your purpose Love ♥ Create and be the light in the darkness.
If it makes you feel any better.... when it's a patron sticker, I like having the date.
I felt the same despair recently and doubted the value of this existence with the war being an immediate threat and climate change being pushed back in my brain a bit, tho I still recycle lol. And honestly I'm glad you had this breakthrough and keep pushing and doing your personal best. For me personally your, as you called them "stupid lil pictures", bring a lot of joy and watching this vlog calmed me down. Gave me this necessary feeling of normalcy I lack so much in times of immediate danger and constant stress. It's a bridge that connects me to life I lost because of cruelty of some and passiveness of others, but life I will have enough mental capacity and agency to take back. Partially thanks to art I consider mental health boosting haha. Your brain worms is the only reality you have and I'm happy you keep fighting your inner battles and I'll try my best to keep fighting mine.
I really get what you mean with the bad state of the world and how things don't matter, I used to be extremely eco-friendly/vegan/... but now I'm a bit more loose because it's so hard to take in mind everything ever and be perfect :') I'm neurodivergent as well and this seems very relatable (because I know a lot of super sensitive autistic/adhd people feeling the load of the world), but I tried to be more positive in life and I've seen a big improvement. I try to keep busy and be thankful every day, and try to make other people their life a little bit better in my silly little way. You also don't really notice how much your work ACTUALLY DOES matter to other people :) For me it does!!
I had to pause and type this comment of course so I didn't hear everything you said afterwards hahahah, but I'm happy you're feeling better about it now
Thank you for this, it's what I needed to hear 💖
“i wanna contribute to the chaos. i don’t wanna watch & then complain, ‘cause i am through finding blame that is a decision that i have made.”
Those flowers though 😍
Bo burnham playing in the background? OK I subbed to the right channel 💛
BTW love these vlogs and you art is beautiful!
Such a lovely chat time, really felt your words and just wanted to give you a big hug ❤️ So happy for your epiphany, makes so much sense, top up that cup 🥰 I’ve download the miracle of mindfulness to listen to now 😊.
Ps 4:20 hehe 😜
Thanks foor poosting - you were a huge inspiration to starting my practice again
Totally get you! 💪 Stay strong and positive! And thanks for sharing! 🥰
A thermal flask works great!