Insecurity or Empowerment? Unpacking Your Relationship with Beauty | BEAUTIFUL and BOTHERED | Ep. 73
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- Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
- On this week’s episode of Beautiful and Bothered, Johnny and Kevin unpack our potential motivations and expectations for beauty and whether it inspires or discourages our relationship with it. Do we wear makeup, maintain our hair, and use skincare motivated by self-expression and empowerment, or can cultural beauty standards and expectations create resentments and insecurities? If expectations are the root of all heartache, how can embracing self-expression and joy inspire self-love, confidence, and empowerment?
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![FendiDa Rappa - Clock Dat ft. Shamar Marco [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3NBU8KHdxYY/mqdefault.jpg)
I just want to wrap my arms around both of you and hold you tight. Kevin, you made me cry. I've had so many discussions like this with my own son (Yes, he's gay), trying so hard to make sure he knew he was loved, that he could tell me anything, that I would always be here to support him in any way I could, but always understanding that I just might not be enough. It's been a long, heart-wrenching journey, and I know the journey isn't over for any of us, but please know that you both are loved and adored, appreciated and respected for being exactly who you are. I know there are still so many people out there who just can't or won't accept you for who you are, but the numbers of us who do and will are growing, and we love you.
This is so kind and means the world to us ❤ thank you 😘
THIS!!
Nicely stated. 🫶
You sound like a great mom! ❤
Hey Johnny and Kevin. I adore you two. I'm a 65 year old retired gay male hairdresser ( I use that term because, truly, I am an old queen that loves nothing more than 'dressing' hair up) . I started my training in 1976 but my passion was makeup. The opportunities in makeup just weren't there yet (I'm from Ottawa, Canada). And like you guys, I had to get out of high school and be creative. So, Hairdressing it was. I got the chance to work for stage productions and drag shows on the side so that filled my need to do makeup. When MAC came along I was already decades into doing hair and wasn't brave enough to start all over. But I live my makeup fantasy career through you two. All the highs and lows of it all. Good job and thank you. Jeffrey Paul
Kevin is coming in heavy with the quotes and wisdom 🙌
"Failure implies I tried"
💙💜
I love how they switched hair colors from the beginning 😂🤣
Lmao we said the same thing when I dyed it! 😂
@@beautifulandbothered Are you both look FINNNE~! Seriously, your colors look amazing on you both and so amazing to see you thriving
Wow as a gay man who loves beauty and who is just on the edge of turning 20 this year, this episode is hitting so close to home. I struggled with mental illness my entire life and grew up in an extremely orthodox jewish community/ family where I too felt from such a young age that I was destined to die young because I couldn't comprehend a world that I deserved to have a future in. I am so grateful to have made it past the nightmare years of high school and being a teenager still alive and well. I am only now at my age learning how to love myself and the life I was given and have begun healing the scars that my upbringing left behind. I was also someone who never a day in their life felt beautiful, I was never comfortable in my own skin and self esteem has been a huge obstacle in my life for as long as I can remember as well as s--cid-al ideation. This podcast means so much to me and you two are truly so inspiring to me in a way that allows me to visualize how I can be myself and grow up to be successful and loved and confident. Thank you a million times to Johnny and Kevin for sharing your stories with us and know that it means the world to people like me. Love you guys sm!!
My sweet spot is a red lip. Anyone wearing a red lip is doing it for 2 reasons:
1) You're feeling it.
2) It's armour. You're going through something and faking it till you make it.
I'm gonna cheer you on regardless of the reason.
Church is in people. Today's podcast is paired with aperol spritz, I'm on leave tomorrow and this could get messy.
already 2 Sam Adams’ in… I feel you
Hey girls I'm having a michalda!! Love having a drink or two with ya ❤
Love an aperol spritz! Guess I'll make one too!
Hey, besties! I knocked over my glass of a really good cab, but luckily I have more and a cheap bottle of wine for later 😂
Cheers, y’all! 🍷
@@stacyjane8014 cheers 🥂🥂🥂
1. Johnny, your hair is FABULOUS.
2. Fellow former theater kid with ADHD… the ADHD bliss of living in the moment, experiencing your passion, is SO real. It’s the perfect dopamine rush. I wish I hadn’t tried to live up to others’ expectations of me by abandoning theater for more “realistic” or “practical” fields of study/career avenues. I didn’t know how much my ADHD brain needed to do what I truly loved in order to be happy.
3. 24:11 Kevin, I’m crying. Glad you’re still here. You are so loved. ❤
okay but why did Casey's call about the London broil make me tear up again?! He is such a tender bean and I love your love for him, Johnny. this is such a great episode.
I love that "tender bean" saying. Adding it to my lexicon.
Oh Kevin , I am a mom and my heart broke for your adolescent self when you said you thought you were better off d3@d . I am so happy you are here. You bring so much joy to the beauty community . I hope if there is anyone struggling today that they hear this episode and know that deserve everything they want in life and you are loved .
Also Happy Pride !
I'm a 56 yr old straight woman .I watch you guys religiously. I can relate with so much of what you were talking about fitting in high school and even today because people are just nuts these days. I don't need all the negativity in my life that others bring. Love you. Thanks for the honest conversation. ❤❤❤
Similar, 53, mum of 3 and love their content, whether it’s makeup or mental health.
59 👋🏻
My eyes leaked so many times during this....I'm 39 a mum of 6 I went thru somewhat of a midlife crisis 3yrs ago....I didn't want to be here....I didn't know who I was outside of a mum...my x husband unalived himself....makeup was my saving grace....it became my safe place....and u guys became my church with this pod...I'm so grateful ur both here doing this....last seasons blooper episode is my favorite thing to watch when im having a shitty day....thank u for everything u guys do❤
@dizzieblonde thank u so much....what a lovely thing to say. Not being here wasn't an option but finding myself and being proud of who iv become was hard.
I'm glad you're still here.
omg Kevin you have me in TEARS because I can remember feeling this SO STRONGLY as a queer young person. I love yall for having this conversation
Hyper fixation and executive function disorder are my bane and its effected my relationship with beauty.
From being easily infulanced, over spending, then not having the motivation to wear it, even if I love how i look and put together
This is so real, hey twin💗🤎😘
@@lisafranklin9089 We out here in the trenches trying to make it work
Same, plus depression says why bother
So relatable! Honestly my neurodivergence radar pings into overdrive in the beauty community, but I bet so much of it is overlooked cos of femme erasure within medical frameworks of adhd, autism and the neurospice cabinet
Kevin- I am just crying at you sharing your 13-16 story. I am so glad that you are still on this planet. I’m so glad you made it to this moment. Love you both to the moon and back ❤
22:48 this convo just gave me an aha moment as well.. all of my family are (now) recovering addicts or dead. As a child, I was always told "you're just like your mama, you'll never be anything just like her" as an insult when I wouldn't just sit down and shut up whenever I felt like an adult wasn't doing what they should as an adult, so I literally couldn't look past that pain and doubt from those few dark moments, even when I had every teacher or counselor or responsible adults telling me how amazing and smart and compassionate and creative they thought I was. The good never outweighed the bad. So, at 15 years old I became a drug addict like my mom. I lost myself by hanging out with people way older than me, that were the type of people that put me down when I was younger. I literally sought out the type of life they told me I was only good for.
I'm 29 now, with 4 beautiful daughters, a healthy relationship with a man whom adores me, I've been sober for several years, and I've finally got a decent entry level job that I'm interested in pursuing a degree in. I never imagined a future for myself where I was happy because I let a handful of people convince me I'd end myself young due to my own negligence. That's crazy.
I just graduated from art school yesterday, and this hit me so hard. I needed to hear this right now. I'm not going into beauty, but you both are such an inspiration, and this video really gave me the hope I needed right now to keep being excited about the future.
As a corporate woman who worked her way into a senior leadership position, it’s been a challenge for me corporately to be taken seriously because I love fashion, hair, makeup, performing arts, etc. Since I turned 40, I have said F-it they’ll accept me for the badass mama I am, and it’s finally paying off where I feel I can straddle both worlds.
Thank you both for this; it encourages me to remain true to myself with no reservations.
As I'm listening to your discussion (and completely relating to SO much of it), and I can't help but think that you're highlighting the simple questions we all face throughout our lives.... "What's the point? What's my purpose? What will bring my joy in life?" We've all been conditioned to think that our 'purpose' is supposed to be so obvious and concrete, only to discover that it's often been incorrected defined by people who don't even have a clue about their own lives let alone ours. The absolute hardest thing to do in life is to live precisely how we want to, because there's no end to people who line up specifically to criticize us for not adhering to their ideas of what we should be. Learning not to give a shit about what they think and want is liberating.
I really relate to this episode, not as a gay person but as someone who was seen as “undesirable”. Being an overweight teen I was an outcast. I was made to feel that I could only have a husband if I lost weight, I could be successful if I lost weight, I would belong if I lost weight, and one of my favs…”it’s a shame because you have such a pretty face”. Now all these years later it’s really hard to undo that thinking, which I couldn’t help but internalize. A person’s worth should NEVER be tied to their appearance and beauty. Thanks for sharing this
Yes yes yes to this!! My whole mission is to “undefine” the beauty industry. I also strongly believe that beauty starts in your head, not in mirror. TY for this important convo and happy pride 🌈
Not that I fucking cried through the whole episode?! 🥺 THANK YOU SO MUCH for sharing... I can't relate to that more... I hope we can make our life better to feel & live through as the days goes while we are working on it... Let's do whatever we feel good❤ Who caaaarrreees🎉
That feeling Kevin describes about makeup being a safety blanket- not being able to leave the house without makeup -- as a dancer & someone whose mother never left the house without makeup-- I felt that until just 2 years ago.
My gosh-- it's so freeing to not feel that.
‘Expectations are premeditated resentments’ - Katya Zamolodchikova
You are loved, admired, respected etc. Please don't sell yourself short. Wish I could hug you both. Shine as bright as you can. You are an inspiration to others. Big hugs, LisaKaye
Johnny changed his hair! I love it: also, you guys always have such a real outlook on the beauty industry.
I can only speak for me but, as a woman, I'm really used to being let down by pretty much everything. Through therapy I've learned the only person you can do it for is you. Can I just say though, what you do touches loads of people. Really love you guys, not in a stalker way because nobody needs that shit in their life.
I’m also (undiagnosed) ADHD and deal with the same productivity-guilt loop as an entrepreneur. And that Wizard of Oz analogy is soooo spot on 🤯
47:25 This is why I love that y’all have this podcast and that you’ve started a Patreon. I feel like every week, I see comments on your videos that are like “I don’t even use makeup, but y’all are so fun to watch.” And this is so true. We fell in love with YOU. No expectations. Screw the algorithm. Please do what you are passionate about, and we’ll support you and will love watching you.
I do hope you find your makeup inspiration again, Johnny, but no expectations. I just hope you find it for YOU! I still think about that Kevyn Aucoin pod y’all did where you nerded out over every little detail from some of his most iconic looks. It was my favorite because you can just tell how much passion y’all have for this art form.
Thank you. ❤
I recommend this to my 16 year old non binary child, they of course rolled their eyes at me because of course I have no idea about anything according to them. lol hopefully they watch it. The middle part was especially pertinent to them. I appreciated this episode.
Did i just got free therapy?
I love that at the beginning, Kevin was Brunette and Johnny was Blonde, then they slowly started looking more and more alike until they were twins in the last episode and have now swapped.
OMG U GUYS LOOK FABULOUS, Love the Lipstick Kev ❤
As someone who has ADHD and who has been diagnosed since the age of six, caffeine is a great tool background noise something that I’ve listened to 1000 times and noise canceling headphones when I’m trying to be productive.
This is going to sound strange but Kevin- the thumbnail is BEAUTIFUL. It conveys the emotion of the episode so effectively… your makeup, your expression. We appreciate you both so much for sharing so vulnerably 💜💜
Kevin, Johnny, i just want to reach out and hug you both. You guys are so brave. There are people watching and listening, both young and old, who need to hear what you have to say. Love you both❤
Why do we live so much in our own heads to the point where it can become debilitating. We get so worried about what everyone else is going to think of us but in reality we’re not as interesting nor as captivating to others as we think we are so just do your thing and live your life. Be kind to others and be good to yourself.
I love that Casey called in the middle of the therapy session with such a basic request…the reality of life!
Thank you both for sharing.
I love how you guys were discussing the event you'll be attending and Kevin was like, '... And I've planned out where we're going to eat...'. That's exactly what I do! And it's what I raised my son to do. My husband will say he wants us all to go somewhere and my son and I are like, "What kind of restaurants are nearby?" Girl, it's all about hte food!
I really needed this today. I've felt so stuck in my life after becoming a stay at home mom of two baby girls. I feel horrible everyday because I never thought I would have kids or be married and now I have this family and life I only dreamed of. But along the way I lost myself. I recently tried some makeup that you both talked about on patreon. Going back to makeup has sparked something in me. I've been on zombie mama mode for the last 6 years. I used to think as a teenager I wouldn't live to see 33. I was so depressed and lost. Becoming a makeup freelancer saved me in a way. It gave me an outlet. It's full circle and I just want to thank you for having a platform for those os us who technically don't "fit" the standard of kissing ass on our way up the ladder. I love you both! THANK YOU SOOO MUCH. I cried throughout this episode!!
When he asked, "can I wear makeup to work?" I would love to meet the bosses or the people you worked for on your channel. Not so much the place, but the people outside of your family that helped 'validate' YOU! As a content creator that had staff that I employ, I strive to be good, do good, and hope one day this very conversation takes place and know they were safe here.🥰😍
I relate so much to thinking I would die young, not picturing or having dreams for a future, because I really was so sure I would not make it, because there was absolutely no way for me to. Then when I became an adult I realised there wasn't really anything I wanted to do or see, because I quite simply had not thought that far ahead. And all this time I thought I was the only one who felt this way. Hearing someone else talk about this is so powerful, thank you so much for sharing your stories.
I'm dealing with a lot at home, and these videos mean so much to me.
I completely get where they are coming from. I think there needs to be a cultural shift of redefining “productivity” as a concept. It took me years to learn that rest in its truest and purest form for the person is EXTREMELY productive. In a culture that overvalues quantitative results (profits, hours worked, number of completed projects etc) it completely ignores the concept of qualitative value. If it serves the greater greed, it is more likely than not, at the cost of you
As an aroace person and a woman with big dreams, I needed this conversation for many reasons. I don’t have any examples of people in my life or really in any media I like, for how my life can look. It’s so so hard. Thank you both so much for what you do. I know our struggles are not the same and I have the privilege of being straight passing, but I just wanted to thank you all the same for staying here and putting your authentic selves out there. I’m grateful for you both. You’re truly helping people 💕 Happy pride 🌈🎉
Thank you talking about your struggles with mental health especially ADHD! I was diagnosed and medicated for ADHD when I was 10. Stopped taking it at 18. Just started adhd medication after trying to raw dog it for the last 15 years. I was so hesitant to start meds again. I tried everything I could and It was so hard to accept that I don't think I can do it on my own.
I was diagnosed ages ago, long before the meds became the college kids new coffee
I fought hard when I decided to stop the meds.. and the way I describe that time was like I felt underwater for years. I decided to go back on the meds and it was like putting on glasses when you can’t see
Meds aren’t a commentary on you or who you are. Please do what works for you and don’t even think about anyone else’s opinion. You deserve to be the best version of you, however you get there..
❤
@@stacyjane8014 Thank you! I appreciate that. It was a tough call. I didn't want another pill. I have auto immune issues, EDS, and arthritis. So I am on a bunch of different meds. It feels good to have a quiet brain for the first time in what feels like forever.
@@DisobedientAvocado82 You are so welcome, and lawdy, I completely understand
CRPS here.. I got to the point that it forcing the meds down made me gag
I’ve worked hard to manage that stuff and get rid of the stuff that wasn’t helping, but I realized that the stuff that does is important
Just know you aren’t alone. You are a warrior and only you know what helps
And our beauty besties have helped convince me that sometimes I fight harder with a lil lipstick and some sass. Stay strong and as they always say.. you are beautiful
Welcome to church everyone ❤❤
Hello sister❤
Johnny - love your brown hair.
Top tip: I naturally have light ash brown/dark blonde hair.
Davines sell a really good ash brown shampoo and a conditioner.
When I was a child, the AIDS epidemic hit with a vengeance. In our formative years, there was no medication available here until 1996. The age of consent in the Britain is 16. My g*y friends were terrified, I was scared for them. The ones who have survived talk about it like they lived through a war (which in a way, they did). That’ll mess with your childhood memories.
🇬🇧 person here: what in the name of all that is holy is London Broil?
I think it is a steak.
@@chickenleg002 😂 if so, I hope that it’s good quality. The meat we produce in the UK and the EU in general is excellent.
It's usually a top round steak that's marinated and grilled. A good one is an out of body experience; a bad one is a tough slab of sadness.
@@maryeckel9682 ‘a tough slab of sadness’ 😂😂😂
this episode is THE ZEITGEIST of personal development and expression and of the beauty industry. Authenticity reigns supreme!!! So proud of you both and thank you for sharing!!!
Well that was a therapy session I didn’t realise I needed 😂
I am sorry both of you had to deal and feel these types of emotions and situations. I would be your friend and accept you just as you are. 💯🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️💕💯🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻 Glad you are both here. ❤your videos.
Johnny, as a fellow late diagnosed adhder, i totally understand how you feel. Getting a diagnosis really changes your life and requires you to rethink how you think about yourself and what you knew. It goes from feelings of failure and hatred towards yourself to, my brain chemistry is different (adhd is a lack of dopamine) and that is why i am like xyz. Having a diagnosis for both my adhd (at 18) and autism (at 20) i think saved my life.
The true beauty of beauty is that it actually has depth and texture and richness. This episode was truly beautiful for the exact same reason. I'll be heading over to Patreon after feeding my husband so I can enjoy you guys even more. And I just shared this episode with my son and I'm hoping we can discuss it tomorrow when we go to lunch together. Love you guys!
I’ll miss you both singing “sisters sisters” together with your blonde hair but Jonny the brown hair looks great. I use purple shampoo when my brown hair gets brassy.
Being 43 watching your existential crisis of 30 is nostalgic for me.
Just seeing Kevin's face in the thumbnail---- *big exhale* it's about to get real
Oh, love the video idea! I decided to let my natural gray grow out when I turned 40. I have some Stacey London streaks going, and I feel like a bad ass 😮
Also babes I listened to last weeks episode like 6-7 times! I absolutely goon for the industry insider knowledge 💦💦
I just wanna hug both of you 😩 I'm so sorry for the stuggles you've had. I adore you both and hope for nothing but the best for you in the future. Thank you for being people that my 🏳️🌈kids🏳️🌈 can look up to.
“if you like doing it and you’re having fun doing it, you’ll find a way to live”
are almost the exact words a childhood music teacher told me when i was younger. he was so wise and as kids we did not appreciate it (he was speculated to be gay, i went to a catholic school) and hearing that again is such a nice reminder. because those words always spoke to me. 🥺 ty for the reminder
(also i will never not support you two talking abt your experience because while yes i grew up to be nonbinary i did grow up as a “gay boy” and the experience is the same 🫶🏼)
Love you both so much!I'm old enough to be your grandmother, and love your realizations about the realities of life. Whenever I have lost my MOJO I focus on something else for a while, and eventually it comes back! Again, love you both !
LOVE THE HAIR JOHNNY LOOKS SPECTACULAR ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you!! ❤
Am I the only one spinning after watching this episode?!? As a small business owner, in a small town I am surrounded by so many traps of ppl pleasing which as funneled into my life as a whole and as I’m listening I’ve had so many epiphanies! A lot in my life needs to change! I live 90% for others and 10% just isn’t enough for me anymore! A huge thanks to Johnny & Kevin for this episode and for being so vulnerable🤍
Good evening guys love from Deb in Scotland 🏴 ❤❤
Music cannot ever sound as good as it did when we were about age 14 - it's a brain development fact, so it's ok! Thank you for this episode, it's incredibly open and honest. I feel like I'm right there with you both. 🖤 My therapist has been helping me sustain healthy habits during periods of apathy, theory being that the passion will cycle and I'll need good habits to be ready for it to come back, hopefully sooner than just waiting for it. Not sure if that makes sense, lol ❤
Also, I worked with a guy who said he peed in the pancake batter at McD's repeatedly. I don't eat anywhere with disgruntled employees... 😧😵
Lovely episode! It’s nice to see that all different walks of life can have such similar experiences with beauty and finding themselves! Much love ❤
Just starting this eps however I have to say Kevin’s hair is on point!
THIS is why representation matters!! THIS is why Pride is important. ❤🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
Waves in ADHD. My fellow neurospicy people, the new notebook/diary isn't going to fix us. It's pretty though. Oh Kevin and Johnny. Sat here crying, the dark places tell seductive lies and the world is better with you in it.
I need to hug you both....❤
Opening up about your childhood and growing up gay! ❤😢
I know we all grow up with insecurities, but I can't imagine how it felt for you both 😢
This hits me hard on a whole different level! I lost my husband very unexpectedly a year and half ago 😢,.! I've been scared and stuck! This resonates with me.... I just need to move forward with life and take chances ❤!
And my birthday is June 15th and I'll be 63 and I need to embrace my age and be happy I'm alive ❤
63 is great!
I went gray really young. I was covering grays in my 20s. At 34 I decided enough. I hated going to salons once a month for hours to dye my hair. And I hated doing it myself. I made the decision to grow out the gray hair. The response from women was so weird. Suddenly I was letting myself go or aging myself. I didn't care. I'm 40 now and I LOVE my gray hair. Beauty should be what makes you feel beautiful not society expectations. This is my small experience with that.
Gray is glorious
I'm currently going through a relatable struggle... I got a very specific degree for an industry I love, but it is one of the most homogenous industries I have ever seen. Personal style and self-expression are crucial in determining who will hire you. I've been rejected from jobs for the style of work I produce because it doesn't match the mainstream, so I've recently had to spend time creating an entire project in a style I totally HATE because, at the end of the day, I need a job. I need work, even though it kills me to be so dishonest to my true self. In theory, sure, jobs where my style are desired exist, but definitely in the minority, and I can't just pick up and move across the globe until I find it... I am struggling to cope with the fact I'm gonna have to live a lie for a while until I find a chance to break out, and it's tough.
It especially sucks when you study and work for a "creative" thing and it ends up so stifling. Sending hugs and fuck ems
I go to therapy on Tuesdays and when my roommate comes home from work we talk about the same topics. We call it trickle down therapy!
I need to make my perfect red lipstick!
Such a good episode: so much to process on so many different levels - thank you for speaking on all this. I’m going to be processing this all for some time.
I'm going to need to rewatch more than once. So much honesty and wisdom from men who could be my grandsons.
Johnny not wanting to unintentionally ruin Christmas for kids is such a thoughtful thing!!!
I'm so glad yous created this episode! I LOVE the relatable deep convos!! THANK YOU BOTH!!! I know I can relate to having expectations, and once I get to that goal, I'm still not happy!!! Slowly learning to let go, and just say fuck it..if it happens..it happens..trying to live in the moment instead of looking towards the future ❤ THESE episodes are my favorite..fuck the brands..lol
Wow,What a powerful show!
I am heterosexual female who felt like I never fit in anywhere!
I suffered with depression for years.
I never felt good enough enough and it is still a daily battle.
My father told me I was ugly and made fun of my developing body.
I have always been self conscious about how I look.
Thankfully, I married someone who thought I was beautiful!
My husband died four years ago after celebrating 39 years.
My husband's journey with Early Onset Alzheimer's changed my life.
I did videos,found my voice, and found my gifts to help people!
I can't believe I now speak publicly!
We all have to find ourselves !
I am a huge Mental Health Advocate and I go for counseling!
Hugs and love to Johnny and Kevin!❤🤗🫂💜
You guys are absolutely supported and inspiring. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability. It’s definitely not for nothing. Happy pride month you beautiful humans 🖤🏳️🌈
I absolutely adore you both SO much! ❤💄🔥🏳️🌈
As a 52 year old female...as I've gotten older, I've simply run out of fucks to give. I wear whatthefuckever I want. If I want to wear makeup, I do. But most of the time I don't. And I have a rather large collection. Is it going to waste? Meh, maybe. Will I still try it/use it? 1000% yes. I color my hair on a regular basis...blue, teal, red, pink, silver. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's fun. So is makeup. It's not that serious. If you don't like my legs in skinny jeans, don't look. It's that simple. Love you both oodles!! I hope y'all find that spark and get to feeling like yourselves again!❤
From one who never really fit in.💔❤️🔥❤️🩹💗🏳️🌈
P.S.
Happy Pride y'all!! 🏳️🌈♥️
Johnny ur hair looks so good!!!! Can't wait to see the lipstick lab over of patreon!!! Love u both so much....
First of all…Happy Pride to you both. I sometimes feel like a broken record when I comment on your stuff but I just want to tell you all that you guys have seriously changed my life this year since I discovered your channel and podcast. I have grown with a lot of disdain for being gay, being in theatre, being into beauty and I didn’t know how to channel this fear I had. You guys have shown me that a life like this can mean something. I use to do things for everyone else but now I’m finally doing things for me. As a gay man in his thirties now I have more confidence in who I am just in the past year. I feel like I watch you guys for a chance to heal my inner child that never got to do things FOR HIM. I have recently started to express myself in more ways beyond gender identity. You guys have seriously given me a gift of confidence in being me and also knowledge of skincare and makeup and hair products that have also changed my whole life. I cannot express to you all how thankful that you two came into my life via this podcast. Truly thank you so much. From one 30 year old man to others, HAPPY PRIDE MONTH TO YOU BOTH.
I highly recommend Christine Hassler's book, "Expectation Hangover" to go deeper on this subject that you've both articulated so beautifully in this episode. Thank you.
We go to the Folcroft Dinner in Folcroft PA! There’s also a great cheesesteak place called Leo’s down the street!!!! Check them out if you’re ever in the area!!!!
my favorite podcast to date. you two are such incredible and INSPIRING humans..i was vacuuming listening to this and all i could think about was how i just need to STAND UP and do what my heart wants to do. no shame, no fear. thank you❤️
These episodes are my FAVORITE. I love how genuine and raw you guys can get; it's so valuable. No one else is having these conversations, but IDGAF about the downfall of Kim Kardashian (I mean I'll watch it don't get me wrong), IDGAF about some creator's 25 summer Amazon faves (could you *be* more transparent about trying to get me to click your affiliate links?). This is real. ❤
NY/NJ diners are the way. 🥰
I would just love to figure out a way for the red to stick longer. 🤦🏻♀️ I really need to get over to patreon, I have a lot to catch up on. If it's not in my face I forget to check. Object permanence issues. 🤦🏻♀️ Pretty sure I exist in the ADHD spectrum as well from what I have been reading and how it is so different in women than men.
I want to give you both the BIGGEST hugs. 💖💖💖
Omg I have to leave a comment here this time... For a loooong time I've been trying to figure out why I keep watching the pod. I am from Russia, we don't even have most of that make-up or skincare you guys talk about. I don't even do make-up myself, just some glitter occasionally. I think I got my answer today - not only are you two absolutely amazing people, but you also sometimes bring up stuff that emotionally resonates with me. Like this episode. EXPECTATIONS SUCK 🎉🎉🎉 What you were saying felt really comforting, thanks a lot for putting it out here ✨❤️🔥✨
Hi Johnny and Kevin, wow this video raised some deep emotions,expectations can be so mixed, acceptance by our peers in the way we present ourselves can be a positive thing or have a negative emotional impact on your life, l am 56 1/2 years old, i grew up watching “THE SONNY & CHER SHOW “loving the fashion,skits and music,comedy on the show, cut to being a teenager in early 80’s still loving Cher& her music ( still do now), also inspired by Cindy Lauper, boy George- Culture Club, when creating colourful eyeshadow looks, because that’s me, & feeling accepted by my peers was a big deal then ,now at this age I seek no one’s approval just my own , I love you both for who you are- intelligent , beautiful ,kind ,creative men. Love Katherine xoxo
I was diagnosed with ADHD less than 2 yrs ago (and most likely on the spectrum). Idk why, but finding out I was neurodivergent kinda through me into a spiral. I didn't know how it presented in women.... but I felt like I was somehow a fraud or inauthentic. I never thought of myself as "masking".... and just the thought that maybe I was presenting an inauthentic version of myself to the world really bothered me. Because I was ignorant to what the symptoms are in women, I really had a hard time accepting that diagnosis. My little sister has ADHD, and she recently also found out that she's on the spectrum. I had cut her out of my life for 3 yrs (sounds horrible, but I was a new mom that had to do what's best for my family and me). Our mom got sick suddenly...and that brought us back together. We found up losing our mom that we're both extremely close with. I know my mom would be proud to see us now. She's not just my sister....but dare I say best friend? While I'm 7 yrs older than her (we just had our birthday Saturday.... yup, we have the same birthday), she's helping me understand so much about myself and understanding the ADHD/being on the spectrum. Growing up I was labeled a "picky eater" (I honestly wish I wasn't....but I can't stand certain textures). I was also labeled extremely sensitive. Idk I honestly think stupid little labels like that can absolutely affect you. Made me view being sensitive like it was a bad thing...when, in reality, I had a lot of empathy and compassion for others. Why make it into a negative sounding thing? Anyway, I'm done ranting.
Oh, Johnny.... my sister quoted you this weekend. She told me how she was mindlessly scrolling Tik Tok when that clip of you saying people don't hate way people....they hate femininity. She told me how profound that was.... and that you're absolutely correct. Then of course I asked her if she watches Johnny and Kevin lol. Long story short, she's now very familiar with the podcast. Sending lots of love to you both. Since losing my mom, I've been in a deep depression. Hearing you guys being real about your struggles has helped me more than you'll ever know. Been here since day 1 but usually a silent viewer.
Love you guys ❤
Klarissa
What a beautiful episode to start the Pride, a superb conversation! Thank you 🙏 ❣️✨🫶🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️Much love to yous🥰
Y'all said "Stephanie's birthday" and I thought you were talking about me since I'm watching this on my Birthday 🤣🤣
I didn't realize I had ADHD until I was 45!!! Music helps me so much to concentrate but it cannot have lyrics. I usually listen, with headphones, to classical music so I can concentrate. ❤❤❤
Okay, dorky food historian moment... New Jersey is the diner capital of the world. It all started in the 1920s with lunch wagons in Rhode Island. Eventually, they spread all over the East Coast, and by the 1950s they were Nationwide. But you're correct, they started on the East Coast first. I love you guys and all that you do. You're both so inspirational and wonderfully real. ❤
Oh Johnny, I think we might be soul mates! I also didn't plan for the future because I didn't think I'd be here. I think the way you talk about music, childhood creativity, etc. is so familiar.
Putting the energy out there: THIS EPISODE WILL DO WELL! ❤🙌🏼
Much rather have ten more of these than another Kardashian video 🙈
This is such an important topic that doesn't get enough exposure in social media - it's not selling a product. More people need to realistically discuss their relationships to beauty and standards, etc.
I love you both. I am not gay. I cannot fathom your struggles. But as a neurodivergent, I will always feel like I don't "fit in" with society.
Thank you for your introspection, critiques of social norms and vulnerability. Don't get me wrong, I LUV some sassy critiques of products (a la Hautemess Tom) and other "non-serious" issues. But this content was needed.
Hey, besties! First, love y’all so big and I’m so proud of how the two of you are willing to share your true thoughts and feelings while taking me and the thousands of your other besties with you
Okay, here comes my old lady (a solid 10 years older than y’all so I’m definitely ancient) thought/idea
Y’all are going to find your juju, your passion, your fun in this space and I am not an expert on anything, nor do I play one on tv.
Ok, ok, I’ve beat around the bush enough.
This industry isn’t opening the doors. It’s unfair and frankly bullshit. But, y’all have a loyal following because we love both of you (and Casey and Dan)
Do something different. They can’t ignore you when you are freakin huge. The traditional (haha beauty RUclips can now be called ‘traditional’) way of influencing isn’t y’all, and you can’t put beautifully shaped, unique pegs into round holes.
A while back, y’all joked about doing a surprise visit at a beauty store. Helping real people, being funny, teaching.. and both of your personalities would freakin shine.
Obviously, I don’t know how the logistics would work, and lawd knows I would pass all the way out and need copious amounts of wine before I stopped fangirling if I met you while staring at shit trying to figure out how to hide these deep trenches that magically appeared under my eyes after I turned 29 for the 15th time..
But it could be fun, and informative and.. different
Something that might make those of us that don’t love makeup but have to be a slave to it because lawd forbid that I ‘look tired’ at work without a full face of it.. maybe you can show us how to love makeup too
Anyway, love these weekly chats we have in my living room and sorry again about knocking over the wine glass.. but who care when you are hanging out with your besties?!?
🩷💜🩷💜🩷💜
I commented this before, but I will again:
Gaga doesn’t have to make music FOR YOU
And Joanne was amazing
Still love you and watch always!
💜🙏 The number of times I 😭 teared up during this episode...Wow! Did I ever need to hear this, and I'm not even in the beauty industry. However, I am a Gen-Xer who has also been going through it this past year (hopefully, I'm starting to come out of it as well), and makeup, hair, and beauty were always my forms of self-expression, even as a teen. 🎨 I've always said, "Makeup is like art for your face," and I still believe that.
🛡⚔ It also can be a form of armor, and it has most certainly been that for me in the past. Sadly, this past year--and even before--I quit taking care of myself as much as I should due to grief/losses. The thing is that I really did love doing all of it, and I have kept up with all of the trends/new releases...I'm just not enjoying any of my own makeup like I should.
✨ This episode has reminded me how much I really do love beauty and encouraged me to start enjoying it again--for me. I think it will also be a part of my healing for other areas of my life related to why the past year or so has been so rough, and it will maybe help me to remember who I am at my core. The real me has a bit of artistic expression in her, but the crap of this past year has stifled that creativity and healing, too.
💜🙏 Thank you, Johnny and Kevin, for the real talk and encouragement! Beauty can be empowering even if you don't work in the industry...
I love diners! I’ve seen diners all over, lots in the south too, but we have next gen diners we call “greasy spoons” in the Midwest. A diner to me has a particular layout and shape, where the waitstaff can reach the customers from the counter without having to walk through the whole restaurant. Like the restaurant in the “Nighthawks” painting by Edward Hopper, which is from Greenwich Village in the 40’s, I think. I guess a “casual dining” place could be called a diner regardless of the layout.
Also There was a fancy restaurant (that’s now a VRBO lodge you can rent) around my rural NW Wisconsin home town called Caulderwoods that was an Al Capone hideout. We went there for prom, the only upscale place around