🎯🎯🎯🎯And recentely i just found out about the dark empath 👀👀man i need God spiritual discernment because in the flesh you may see 3 but miss the 4th they are everywhere!!!! 🥵🥵🥵
Too many people verbally abusive and using psychiatrist words online... these psychiatrist purposely brainwashed sooo many people.. and now they are more lonelier, depressed and mostly in therapy alone.. while they make millions and billions off of pills and pain.. need to stop using psychiatrist words.. why so many unhappy now..be mad when they find out most disorders don't exist and they've been running around verbally abusing each other not realizing why they unhappy and lonely as hell and medicated.. psychiatrist played the hell out of social media and most fell for it..
SMDH "Let's get some money, honey". Money isn't everything. It damn sure helps but it ain't gonna hold down your marriage when you become terminally ill. It will keep you out of debt but being protective of your significant other is what's gonna matter. Makes no sense being with a husband or a wife that isn't gonna fight for your survival or show compassion when those doctors and nurses butcher your ass to death with negligence and procedures that don't work. Your money and your insurance ain't gonna matter especially if you're black. They want you dead anyway.
Only until she meets the right dude, or the wrong dude. When she meets that dude she suddenly won't mind kids and he'll knock her up twice before anyone notices.
@@kareemthompson6663 who said we have to be the apostle Paul to be single? Paul wasn't an island. He was single yet working with others in ministry. Same with the Peter and the other apostles. Why do you guys take such offense to someone who is not willing, nor wanting, nor desiring to have a family? Why do you have a problem with a person being single all their life? What exactly is the problem with perpetual singleness?
@@BobbieBins I firmly agree with this statement. But I was in a situation, where I acted with a lack of genuine kindness due to the fact, I was being disrespected for many years, completely disrespected. And I know, now that that will never happen again as long as I am careful with the woman I am with I’ve added to my list of boundaries and one is to never let a woman disrespect my feelings I wear my emotions on my sleeves and I tell them when I’m not feeling good about what they may be doing.
Dude, she's projecting... Who wants to cpme home to this? The whole point of a woman for a man is to come home to a caring wife, that will love you. Not a woman, trying to mascarade as a man telling you, you're worthless after wroking 65hours a week...
Been single 3 years now and decided to go to therapy to heal myself before jumping into another relationship and she is absolutely right. A lot of people are toxic asf and they know they are, just don’t care to fix it
It’s that last sentence…they don’t care to fix it but they are still getting into relationships wasting people’s time and energy. 🤦🏾♀️ We don’t have to be 100% healed before hopping in, but we MUST be willing to self reflect and work on the bad stuff or else getting a new person won’t make a difference. These folks think it’s everyone else except themselves LOL. Weeding out the duds is a hell of a lot easier after doing the deep inner work. 🙌🏾
@@Regina.Clarke how do you know you are healed?... Because I'm getting some good ole "I'm okay, you're not okay" energy here. This lady sounds like a man. Nurturing is baseline for the feminine gender. I don't need it so much but also don't need to date another guy. Your power is your softness, not toughness. You win that way with me and most other men, not with agression. That just triggers my agressive side!!
@@reginaldmagee3586 wow… “nurturing is baseline for the feminine gender” says who, you?? 👀 Not all women are nurturers, including women who have have kids. You went from nurturing to being tough then aggression. That escalated quickly lol. Women can be assertive without being viewed as “aggressive” when needed and soft at times. I understand you have your preference/perspective though.
@Adrianne Hudspeth thousands and thousands of years of gut instinct informs my message. God gave you breasts and a womb for a reason. You nurture babies from conception. To deny this is to deny your purpose and calling.
Those two things tend to run parallel, you just haven't lived long enough. I investigate elder abuse by profession, nothing worse than running old women to the shelter, they broke because of bad spending habits, broken because they got swindled out of their home and have no family at all or family who love them enough to put a roof over their head.
@abysmalvsmarcus OK, so let me ask this. Would you mind if your woman went out to do things around town and traveled the world with family and friends without you? Or do you require your woman to stay home all of the time with you?
Yea u say that but let the next dude who u got them eyes for come thru the door, it's a wrap. All yall say the same thing because who u want don't want u back in the same way. Deal wit it.
Love this! Single 3.5 years after my husband (a good man) died and staying that way! I vacation alone and people just STARE at me. At first, I thought it was pity. Now I am convinced it is silent envy that I can do what I want, when I want and not put up with the 💩 they do!
@@DrooledOn 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂most likely.. But threadleader, WHATEVER MAKES YOUR DAY BETTER!!!! RIP TO YOUR HUSBAND... BUT.... THREE YEARS AND HE WAS A GOOD MAN??? I PROBABLY WOULDNT BE ABLE TO VACAY... GREAT HEALING!
Facts I’ll be turning 30 in October and decided to put the dating game on hold, live a celibate lifestyle, and enjoy being alone for a bit. The last 3 men I dated had kids and they seemed to envy me because I didn’t have any and treat me like a jealous girlfriend and I’m the damn woman 🤣🤣 the last one bashed me for traveling but never been outside our state smh I’d rather be alone than to deal with that BS again 💯
@@secondchance5080 lmao yes from 27 to now I dated 3 different men and the same thing. Shit at this point idk if it’s me or not 🤣🤣 jk. I’m just tired of unhealed men and that’s what I seem to attract so I’m good for right now
Oooh this HIT & IS SHONUFF THEE TRUTH! People DO NOT take the necessary time and action to heal and wonder why their relationships constantly fail! You're gonna hurt either way whether you're hurting to heal or hurting because you continue to ignore your healing process!! The difference is the first options gives you peace and dignity the second option robs you of both of those things it's not worth it heal Ya'll ❤
When you're really aware of the baggage you carry, you let it go. People only carry baggage when they're unaware of it or don't know they can actually let it go... nobody in their right mind would carry some useless beliefs and patterns of behaviors from a past that they don't want to see repeated.
@@sunongral5605how they dont know how to let it go so they need a bit of help havent you thought about that ? Easy to say let go some people had it way worst than you
@@noneofyourbuizness That's why I studied psychology and made it my life's work to assist people in safely coming to terms with their past so they could move on to have healthy relationships with themselves and others.
This is me. Been single for 9 years. Tried dating again last year and babyyyy I was in for a shocker. Being single and free and having my peace is truly where it’s at for me 🎯
Same! It's CRAZY out there. After nearly 3yrs of intentionally being single, started dating again late last yr and damn, did I meet some crazy ppl. Still recovering from the trauma 😢😅.
Partially, she's speaking on no longer pulling weight for those that are not reciprocal and bring more chaos into your life. However, she seems like she also has entered emotions in general as too much labor which makes her seem apathetic and now, she's missing the point of life and humanity altogether. She basically just went from one extreme to the next. From being codependent to now being apathetic when all she needed was some good discernment and boundaries.
This is not what she said She was speaking about both genders To be compassionate and caring does not mean that you have to constantly interact with 30 years old brats, men or women same deal, eternal victimhood is not a goal in life
She seems like unpleasant person to be around. She’s all theory no practice. She’s “been out the game for seven years” and I’m absolutely tired of hearing about people being “healed” it’s such a subjective term at this point. Healed is now “you act in a manner that’s convenient for me”
@@shamekiawalker6358 I'm an aspiring forensic historian and I understand the plight of Our people. It's just disturbing how far the apple has fallen from the tree. So to see and hear a Black woman utter such things I mind blowing. In the Motherland a woman wouldn't even say anything like that even if she feels that way because she wouldn't even consider a man. That's like me saying I'm not about to take a homeless woman home and have her bathe and sleep next to me that very night! Why would I even bring it up. It's just a sad state foe Sistas. I'm trying to rescue my daughter from this bitchyness because I want her to have a Good Man. I raised my daughter and 2 nephews and there's plenty good men but Sistas are dillusional at best, yet I digress...U WIN 🏆 💙 😉 👏 KUDOS, I'm wrong 😆 . Love U
@jacalli the seemingly pretty lady with the unnecessary eyelashes clearly stated "I'm not a nurturing woman! That's why I'm not having no kids!" That's why the brothers are passing on these bunk ass modern women 😒. Well tell Ur friend I said 👋 because she tells u exactly what she meant, Blessings 🙌 😌
😮Right!!! Before social media… you met the real person. Now! You meet the fake strength and live with the weaknesses. S/M is the only platform you can pretend to be someone that you’re not. That’s why you don’t know who’s dealing with trauma base on their appearance. Check their spirit,actions more than their appearance. Don’t put a crown 👑 on a clown.🤡
Was there with her until the end. It's not about being pouty.. everyone has bad days and if you can't be vulnerable with someone yes definitely stay single bc that's a healing needed
Not wanting to be nurturing is also a sign that healing is needed. If you dont heal that aspect about yourself you will hurt the people you come into contact with by being too harsh and empathetic to their feelings and emotions. That is a form of emotional abuse and you should probably stay single until it is healed. The best thing to do is balance your masculine and feminine energies.
Or people can get over their "feelings" and develop a sense of structure to themselves. No one has time to be catering to another person's ego like that which is exactly what "feelings" are.
Exactly why I am still single. I totally agree with her. I am not going to walk on eggshells, so I won't set you off because you're emotionally immature. I am not going codle you and baby you. I already raised my children, and I don't want another adult child that I didn't give birth to.
She was making sense until the last part. How does she not realize that she is actually who she's talking about. She's part of the problem. I do respect her for not having children though, no one needs a mother like that.
I follow her and have been starting to notice she's kinda toxic too. She's always smiling and trying to look happy and unbothered. No one is happy all of the time. She gives me fake positive sometimes. I feel the same way as you. I was with her until she said Ima tell you to let's get some money honey as if money resolves everything. No one is saying to be codependent and nurturing to grown azz people, but she comes off as dismissive and intolerant of anything that is not "positive" or "happy" or "good vibes." You will have problems with people sometimes, they just shouldn't be explosive and unmanageable.
Its amazing how many people in these commenta didnt catch that, glad i wasnt the only one, she on that "its everyone but me even tho i do the same shit" time
@@andreablossom3929look idk who she is but im a guy and if shes giving advice to women about dating you need to unfollow her right now because she gonna be alone, other than whats been said theres nothing at all attractive about a woman whos self desceibed as not nurturing, gives "tough love", amd sees paper chasing as a solution to problems, i mean thats basically a guy were talking about, she looks pretty but acting like a dude, men and women want different things, so many women these days think by becoming like the men tbey want they are more attractive to men(some logic but they do) when it couldnt be further from the truth, i mean thats just masculine energy right there, men already gotta go out and fight the world last thing we want to do is come home and deal with "tough love" from a woman with masculine energy talking about "lets get this money", i mean if you a career woman and on your grind and thats what you want thats cool but just know that is not attractive to men at all the same way it is to women, im not even trying to be rude but that is not the recipe to be a mans peace, or rather the RIGHT mans peace, men want things too and it aint that
Yeah the … “I’m not a nurturing woman” … little cringy… screams “I have a firm wall up “ and I’m not comfortable with being vulnerable… “… don’t nobody wanna be at home with that type of energy🤷🏿♀️
My older sister told me “No one deserves you, truly.” This made me sad and I didn’t understand but now I do because after years and years of looking, I’ve found out that I have so much love and understanding to give and I’ve yet to come across someone with the same. Maybe I’m a hopeless romantic but I actually want a friend, companion AND lover….pure and strong love. It only seems to be about having an accessory, a walking wallet or s*x play-thing nowadays. It seems like a rarity to find that. I’m not looking anymore and I stopped long ago, but if it happens, then it happens. Until then, I’m at peace being single. I wouldn’t dare hurt or abandon myself like another person would ❤
Twin bestie I agree with this. Singlehood is actually better than giving your all to someone who doesn’t appreciate it. Not to mention it’s safer as these days everyone has lost their minds it seems 😅
Guys are literally thinking not to be kind to you. Don't you see the world you've inherited? That doesn't work for men love, I'm sorry you feel this way....
Bro, maybe you should at least TRY getting a passport. There are traditional women all over Asia and many South American countries. Pretty and sweet. At worst, you get to travel and see some of the world…
True. That is where they get their value from. Most people who master true self love are absolutely fine either way. That is why people who try to dog single people are such a red flag to me. Not the single person. Rather you are in a relationship or not, if you understand self love, you would not judge those people in such a negative light.
@@IonSen06 what you done see is women over the age of 50 with no kids talking about how they love life unless it’s money. It’s crazy how something made up consumes them and not the power they were born with. Better make enough so you won’t get scammed by AI or put in a home because there will be no one with them in their latter years
When you stop asking why you're depressed and start asking what you can change about yourself to get you out of that depression, is one of the starts to the healing process necessary to make you whole again. I, by no means, am healed. Probably far from it as I have no idea where I'm truly at in the healing process, atm. But what I do know is that I already feel a lot better about who I am and starting to figure out what I want out of life. And that's the first time I can actually say that. I'm not confused and aimless like I was in my early and mid 20s. Someday I'll get there.
You have to love yourself, first. I mean, the Bible does say love others as you love yourself. (Yes, I know there's another rule that supercedes, off topic). If you dislike or hate yourself.....?
Indeed. She clearly doesn't have any love, though. Trouble can strike at any time and she gives me the feeling that she'll jump ship if the perfect "bank account" has some issues.
@@kathydurow6814the Bible doesn’t refer to that kind of love of self as a good thing. They meant that with our sinful nature comes this image selfishness and love of ourself and our own desires that trumps our love for others and even God. We already put ourselves first which is sin with how we have a nature that leans towards sin. When the Bible say to love others like you love yourself it is saying that just as you have a nature of loving yourself and putting your need first you must reverse that by doing that for others. Loving them by default and putting them fits their as God does the same with us. It’s good for the person to be emotionally mature though and not to put everything on you since that can be draining for a person but for Christian’s who follow the Bible this shouldn’t be a problem since we give our problems to God. I’m secular relationships that can be pretty hard though since your problems are placed on a human who also struggles.
Told someone I was going to therapy to get over previous failed friendships/relationships…was told to go get some help and I’m crazy 😅 …….I lost brain cells talking to that person.
😂 😂😂 Me too!! When we heal/healing then we become the problem ...like what 🤷♀️ I'm just going to sit over here and mind my business lol and continue this "crazy" Healing 😊 😂😂😂
So you told someone you were getting help and they told her to get help🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣amaaaazing! I been in weekly therapy for 2 years and I’ve learned so much, people that don’t understand unpacking and healing don’t know how it spills over into over areas of life…. Parenting, personal relationships, assertiveness, work, daily duties, health and wellness, sleep and diet. My therapist even reminded me that I should be drinking more water 😂. It was great advice because I was dehydrated and didn’t realize it.
When you get a chance look into and ask your therapist about attachment styles. It really helped me understand what was going on with me and help me and my partner communicate better.
Yeah, I have to read this a couple of times, just to comprehend the imbecilic nature of the suggestion. I hope you ran, far away from that person in hopes to never see them again.
It's emotionally exhausting to deal with somebody that's unhealed it's painful cause you can't reach them cause all of their bs is in the way. You can't even see them cause all that baggage weighing them down so much they can't even stand straight. You'll be looking around like 👀👀👀 Uuuuuuuuum helloooo are ya there!!!??🙄🤷
I agree that we shouldn't baby men...they need to grow up if they cannot stand strong themselves before seeking a partner. But not every man is broken or raised poorly. Some out there are really good or at least willing to learn to love themselves and others. The part I cannot understand is the part about this lady not being nurturing at all. A couple should nurture each other as well as their kids and the family as a whole. Not being nurturing sounds alot like not wanting to give or receive true love. I enjoy nurturing my man, and he enjoys nurturing me. But, we give and take from each other in very different ways. We both acknowledge that I pulled the love out of him he never thought was there, and he has for sure made me much tougher and determined. He even made me love in deeper ways I didn't think possible. That is toxic and anti-life to not want to give and receive the love God puts in every living thing. It helps us all grow. Women soothe men and inspire them to expanded ways of being. Healing is needed if one feels like this lady because love is what the world is all about and made of. However, it's good this lady knows to stay out of relationships and motherhood so she doesn't hurt innocent people. This world, notably a man's world....can make women and men feel like avoiding love. But giving into that is like waving the white flag on us female women improving the world we find ourselves in. Just because we are hated by many men that want to destroy the life in us doesn't mean we should join in the hatred... Love always prevails over evil.
@@titeofcpt2867 also.. My sister in law is from Holland. She just divorced my brother because he treated her like trash and is too caught up in American male culture of cheating and disrespecting women... only poor gold diggers accept that crap so if you are seeking a doormat type of female, seek one in a third world country so that she prioritizes your money over you..
My mother was emotionally immature and would constantly dump her trauma and emotions on EVERYONE. Including me. It didn't take me long to realize why both of her marriages failed and family wouldn't visit.
@@TeraChantelle 🛑 OH MY GOD SEVEN YEARS SINCE I'VE BEEN OUT THE GAME AS WELL AND MY MODEL IS....' LET'S GET SOME MONEY HONEY! YOU SURE KNOW WHAT YOU BE TALKIN ABOUT I LOVE IT! 💃💰💳
I've been single for 10 years because I'm terrible happened to me and I wanted to make sure that I was perfectly capable of emotional understanding before I even thought about trying to get into another relationship. About 5 years into being single. I realize people kind of suck so I remained single for another 5 years but on top of that I became celibate because I wasn't going to deal with that crap either. So this woman just said what was in my heart.
Yeah I used to date when I was unhealed. Now that I am healed I just want to be left alone. Imagine that. There are lots of people who need healing. I'd rather be healed and single than in a relationship while broken. My ex told me the other day "when I met you 18 yrs ago I knew you had some problems" I was like "what the feck so you preyed on me in a weak time". Ladies do not get out there before the healing can take place.
Wow, OMG the nerve of him. I always believed they do know and you just confirmed this. They like predators preying on next victim. Smh. Well, just know the woman you are today he could never do that to you again and if you met him for the 1st time now you would not be interested. He hating on you mad because you are so much healed that you would stay in bad place but you won the battle. He sounds ike a narcissist . Stay strong 💪. Much love my fellow Warrior Sis. ❤️
It can be hard to spot those suffering from victimhood, but after you do, and you tried your best, if it is disturbing your peace and dragging you down, walk away... you literally spoke my mind 😂🙏🏿
I was with her until the last point... No I don't build your self confidence... But at the same time I'm not too full of myself to not let you cry on my shoulder and not be there in a time of need. That's how I build trust, can I cry around you for a moment before going to conquer life again. (of course not to every issue, and for weeks on end lol).
I absurd agree with her conclusions, but not her premises. You have to work on your pain, but coddling and hand holding aren't the worst things to come out of people spewing their pain onto you.
Yeah she talking bout tough love when the world is hard enough for a man smh. I need a soft woman, she’s gonna be single for a long time. Nobody is getting any younger
@@RicardoCray ….see, you JUST proved what todays women have been saying about these men saying that they want a feminine or “soft” woman. Y’all want a feminine or “soft” woman to stroke your ego, NOT to really help you. A feminine woman can show tough love. Think about Claire Huxtable or even the step mother “Dee” on the show Moesha. Neither, of those women played the radio with their children (or husbands) but they were damn good women and very feminine and loving, and they were educated and hardworking. ( I know these people are fictional characters, but I wanted to give you examples of feminine women showing tough love and believe me, there are a large amount of women in the real world who are the same).
I feel you, i don't coddle, but i will never not be nurturing, that was in me before i had a child.. that's like loyalty, you either are or you aren't, certain circumstances shouldn't make you unloyal, just like heartbreak shouldn't make you less nurturing
This is exactly what they mean when they talk about “healing.” It’s code for wanting an easy relationship where they think they’re free of being responsible for how they relate to another person and how they’re own behavior may cause another person to feel. She wants a person that doesn’t exist. Humans have emotions that we have to learn how to deal with through compromise in a relationship.
Why dose her voice sound so precious I had a teacher about 30 35 and she looks just like and sounds like her. My teacher helped through my lowest time and just hearing her voice gives me so much comfort ❤
I just appreciate the fact that she stated that she is not a nurturing person so she's not having kids and staying single. She was honest on every level. I approve her message. She kept it real on her end. Nothing wrong with that. ✅
“healing” is just a word ran through women use to avoid men. You can tell she was ran through by how cold hearted she was at the end. A woman who aint nurturing is a damaged woman. Ironic how she hasnt dates in years yet is unhealed herself 😂
@@motalkbadazslook little male, I had s e x only once when I was 23 and it freaked me out how the guy wanted to spend all his time with me and started talking about a life together, it was gross. I'm 47 now and I haven't touched a male ever since. Males just want a replacement mommy, it's honestly creepy.
True. Being someone who has done the work (and committed to continuing the work) while being with someone who hasn’t is exhausting. Truly. When vetting, make sure you know clearly what type of work they have done, if any. If they can’t articulate it and demonstrate self-awareness and accountability, RUN. Don’t walk. Dating and relationships aren’t bad. Our vetting skills are… and self-awareness.
I’m 47 now and I wish I had run into more queens like this when I was in my prime but, it’s all good I’m here now behind the 8 ball and I know it’s never to late. Let’s get it ♎️gang
YEP!!! I was to much of a "nurturer, & giver" & it didn't get me anywhere...me at 53 & still single!!! I have to hold bk now, & let someone elses actions prove they are worth it, etc ..
I see too many people that radiate red flags and too many people that come off as arrogant, annoying, or obviously in need of their own help. I have stuff im working through as well and I want someone I meet to also be someone who understands the journey so we can support one another instead of feeling like I have to walk on eggshells to avoid hurting someone’s ego or triggering their insecurities. Until then I’m fine being alone and not dealing with the bullshit
I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU!!! Alot of people bring baggage into new relationships meanwhile they STILL haven't healed yet. Someone can get married to you, have kids with you and be preaching " I'VE MOOOOVED OOONNN" but still heavily think and wish it was their ex that they did all stuff with. Many people haven't moved on and that's why I'm staying single and childfree.✌🏽
Looking in from Europe, America has some beautiful educated sisters that have their purpose locked down. International travel is good for both brothers and sisters though, it casts the net wider and potentially provides a different perspective !
That’s what it is. The sisters out here have there professional purposes locked in and they are beautiful but dating isn’t really in the cards out this way. We are starting to look beyond our borders because other parts of the world have figured a few things that America sure hasn’t.
What this comes off as to me, ironically, is someone who hasn't learned to accept things as they are. Choosing to be out the game, if not for being in a relationship, because everyone is insecure is choosing to ignore the crux of humanity. It's not about satisfying the ego, it's about being with someone who understands their flaws and is working on it in a manner that is productive. What one will find - in their journey at least (I hope) - is that accepting things as they are does not give emotional baggage. In that same token, it does not also make one absolve themselves of their human feelings like what she is attempting to say here. Just because you're free of emotional baggage and accepting of things as they are doesn't mean you still won't have regrets and occasional breakdowns. It just means that you'll understand what they are and allowing yourself to feel them all the way through will help with the heal - until the scar opens back up again. My point is that people are always going to be insecure. There's a lot more points I can make in critique of this notion, but have doctor things to worry about. If you read to this point, have a great day
Being single is the way to resolve immaturity, bcuz immaturity is a barrier to real love and relationships. Try to go near a person and it's that person's immaturity you're going near and not the actual person him or herself.
The beauty of staying single until you’re ready, is growth! I feel so very blessed to be able to spot bs a mile away and I’m not settling… period!!! There is a good amount of decent single people that are healed, finances together, health on point, careers together, positive vibes, and kids grown!!! We need to start a group!!!
Insecurity is a self-defense skill. You out there watching the game instead of fullfilling your wifely duties. It's called "Marrigae" meaning working and thriving in this world together. You can't get no money alone. The struggle is real.
And a lot of these folks are married in side relationships making everybody life hell… I love this video and she is beautiful I hope she finds a good help mate ✨
Too many narcissistic people out there they want to drain you and break ur soul cos their soul died years ago. BATEL SKATER
🎯🎯🎯🎯And recentely i just found out about the dark empath 👀👀man i need God spiritual discernment because in the flesh you may see 3 but miss the 4th they are everywhere!!!! 🥵🥵🥵
@@tatucorreia 💯
Too many people verbally abusive and using psychiatrist words online... these psychiatrist purposely brainwashed sooo many people.. and now they are more lonelier, depressed and mostly in therapy alone.. while they make millions and billions off of pills and pain.. need to stop using psychiatrist words.. why so many unhappy now..be mad when they find out most disorders don't exist and they've been running around verbally abusing each other not realizing why they unhappy and lonely as hell and medicated.. psychiatrist played the hell out of social media and most fell for it..
Yup and these types want to just use and drain you and not give you anything.
Damn you guys nailed it with these descriptions
She was on point and then started to sound unhealed herself
She said frak feelings, let's make money partna. So sad.
Aren't we all
you're whining now.
fr😂
SMDH "Let's get some money, honey". Money isn't everything. It damn sure helps but it ain't gonna hold down your marriage when you become terminally ill. It will keep you out of debt but being protective of your significant other is what's gonna matter. Makes no sense being with a husband or a wife that isn't gonna fight for your survival or show compassion when those doctors and nurses butcher your ass to death with negligence and procedures that don't work. Your money and your insurance ain't gonna matter especially if you're black. They want you dead anyway.
I can appreciate the fact that she's aware she isn't mom material. Not all women can recognize that in themselves . So kudos to her for being honest.
Heh?
She's not wife material either. 🤣
@@dmccall21 You don't even know this lady. What?
Only until she meets the right dude, or the wrong dude. When she meets that dude she suddenly won't mind kids and he'll knock her up twice before anyone notices.
@@darriuscole8544 dusty
Singleness is a gift.
Yep! ❤️
indeed it is
A gift I want to keep forever along with the virtue that comes with singleness, as well as virtue in general. I just do.
No man is an island..... also you're not the apostle Paul.
@@kareemthompson6663 who said we have to be the apostle Paul to be single? Paul wasn't an island. He was single yet working with others in ministry. Same with the Peter and the other apostles.
Why do you guys take such offense to someone who is not willing, nor wanting, nor desiring to have a family?
Why do you have a problem with a person being single all their life?
What exactly is the problem with perpetual singleness?
Everyone should remain single until they understand how to value kindness and respect each other as human beings. Period.
I agree
Human race ceases to exist* opps
@@BobbieBins I firmly agree with this statement. But I was in a situation, where I acted with a lack of genuine kindness due to the fact, I was being disrespected for many years, completely disrespected. And I know, now that that will never happen again as long as I am careful with the woman I am with I’ve added to my list of boundaries and one is to never let a woman disrespect my feelings I wear my emotions on my sleeves and I tell them when I’m not feeling good about what they may be doing.
Agreed
Yes. And not cheat too
Nobody can’t make the C.U.T.
Communication, Understanding, and Trust.
Nobody’s wants to make the Cut with you Black women have The Biggest egos On the planet it’s a turn off
That is so clever.
You meant C.U.N.T?
I'm adopting this CUT 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽.
Ohhhhhh, that's good right there.
If you can't be compassionate and empathetic to a partner without feeling it's a burden then that person should remain single.
Ngl, she had us in the first half
Social media has turned everybody into a goddamn psychiatrist.
It gives every idiot a platform to talk like this woman 😂worst thing is we live in a world full of follower's
It's the Great Equalizer, right behind the firearm.
And also turned them into narcissists!
And a drone
That's the damn truth 😂😂😂
I’m 25 and I stopped dating because I notice no one was healed but everyone wants something but they can’t appreciate it because of traumas.
ask yourself why are the same kind of people going to you ?
@@kathydelarosa1286WHY ARE PEOPLE SO RAGGEDY IN THE FIRST PLACE???
What are people healing from at 25 years old? What the hell kind of life were they living?
@@TA-ht4jo ummmmm childhood trauma????? Abuse on all levels, neglect, not having enough the list goes on. You must have had a great childhood
@@TA-ht4joLol! That’s what I’m asking? Heal from what? 🥴
“INSACUUR”😂😂
“Sophomore 3 YURS, ain’t picked a CarRUR”😂😂
Kanye
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Lmfao you the mvp for that one
No 💀 😂
This is absolutely one hundred percent true. People need to heal first before going on dates!
Heal from what? 🥴
Dude, she's projecting... Who wants to cpme home to this? The whole point of a woman for a man is to come home to a caring wife, that will love you. Not a woman, trying to mascarade as a man telling you, you're worthless after wroking 65hours a week...
People NEED to put GOD first and not themselves or money.
@@TheTyrial86So youre insecure with a fragile ego? Stay single. Women arent your mama.
@@shay5839 Trauma
Been single 3 years now and decided to go to therapy to heal myself before jumping into another relationship and she is absolutely right. A lot of people are toxic asf and they know they are, just don’t care to fix it
It’s that last sentence…they don’t care to fix it but they are still getting into relationships wasting people’s time and energy. 🤦🏾♀️
We don’t have to be 100% healed before hopping in, but we MUST be willing to self reflect and work on the bad stuff or else getting a new person won’t make a difference. These folks think it’s everyone else except themselves LOL.
Weeding out the duds is a hell of a lot easier after doing the deep inner work. 🙌🏾
@@Regina.Clarke how do you know you are healed?... Because I'm getting some good ole "I'm okay, you're not okay" energy here. This lady sounds like a man. Nurturing is baseline for the feminine gender. I don't need it so much but also don't need to date another guy. Your power is your softness, not toughness. You win that way with me and most other men, not with agression. That just triggers my agressive side!!
Well done Kala🙌
@@reginaldmagee3586 wow… “nurturing is baseline for the feminine gender” says who, you?? 👀 Not all women are nurturers, including women who have have kids. You went from nurturing to being tough then aggression. That escalated quickly lol. Women can be assertive without being viewed as “aggressive” when needed and soft at times. I understand you have your preference/perspective though.
@Adrianne Hudspeth thousands and thousands of years of gut instinct informs my message. God gave you breasts and a womb for a reason. You nurture babies from conception. To deny this is to deny your purpose and calling.
Id rather a broke female than a broken one. Ain't no damn way I'ma emotionally fix a grown adult that hasn't worked on issues for over 20 plus years
@@zelvinaus1143 how can I contact you
Those two things tend to run parallel, you just haven't lived long enough. I investigate elder abuse by profession, nothing worse than running old women to the shelter, they broke because of bad spending habits, broken because they got swindled out of their home and have no family at all or family who love them enough to put a roof over their head.
@@waveofayougen1941 Awwww ❤❤ I love RUclips comments hook-ups!
Hopefully you and zelvina work out! Let me know how it goes 😊
@@zelvinaus1143 wavy_youngen
Owweeeee that'll preach! I must use this❤❤❤❤❤❤
That's why I been staying away from social media , I been debating whether to return or not , it swaying mostly toward not returning
Yea like I’m trying to clean my RUclips feed now.
Don't focus on finding love, focus on loving yourself. Don't forget to eat your broccoli ❤
Self love is a form of masterbation
I don't blame her either.. I'm 45 single with no kids.. there's nothing like having your freedom and avoiding toxic relationships..
42 no kids. Great job but im overlooked cuz im boring
@abysmalvsmarcus You're boring? Does that mean that you're what people like to call a homebody? Do you also have a very quiet, laid-back personality?
@@brwnserenity2351 correct
@abysmalvsmarcus OK, so let me ask this. Would you mind if your woman went out to do things around town and traveled the world with family and friends without you? Or do you require your woman to stay home all of the time with you?
@@brwnserenity2351 if she goes out, I go out.
I’ve been single too long to attempt to date ANYBODY the dating pool is trash and I’m happy alone.
💯💯💯💯💯
Frfr
Amen on that embrace your peace
Die alone!!!
Yea u say that but let the next dude who u got them eyes for come thru the door, it's a wrap. All yall say the same thing because who u want don't want u back in the same way. Deal wit it.
People always forget the love part when it comes to tough love. Sounds like she wants a business partnership not a relationship
Yeah, so that she can screw him in the end.
Yup...almost 4 years for me. A relationship ain’t nothing more than a headache!
Love this! Single 3.5 years after my husband (a good man) died and staying that way! I vacation alone and people just STARE at me. At first, I thought it was pity. Now I am convinced it is silent envy that I can do what I want, when I want and not put up with the 💩 they do!
loneliness looks cute lol
Nobody cares I promise you that. People just look at what’s around them.
Not sure how people still date these things. Haven't dated one of these things in over 12 years
@@DrooledOn 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂most likely.. But threadleader, WHATEVER MAKES YOUR DAY BETTER!!!! RIP TO YOUR HUSBAND... BUT.... THREE YEARS AND HE WAS A GOOD MAN??? I PROBABLY WOULDNT BE ABLE TO VACAY... GREAT HEALING!
@@junkyarddog2509 things???!?!?! What thing do you see??? A thing you may call YOUR MAMA, buy i digress...
Facts I’ll be turning 30 in October and decided to put the dating game on hold, live a celibate lifestyle, and enjoy being alone for a bit. The last 3 men I dated had kids and they seemed to envy me because I didn’t have any and treat me like a jealous girlfriend and I’m the damn woman 🤣🤣 the last one bashed me for traveling but never been outside our state smh I’d rather be alone than to deal with that BS again 💯
You 30 and putting dating on hold ? Might as well make it in
@@secondchance5080 lmao yes from 27 to now I dated 3 different men and the same thing. Shit at this point idk if it’s me or not 🤣🤣 jk. I’m just tired of unhealed men and that’s what I seem to attract so I’m good for right now
Lynn one of the men was mad because I traveled . He never traveled before either. He said it was for show offs and likes online 😂
@@TheHoodHippi facts! Mine said the same and I only have RUclips, no instagram Facebook or snap. Just pure jealousy that we don’t have time for 🤣💯
It’s called mommy and daddy issues. Can’t be excited for a woman trying to make it!
Oooh this HIT & IS SHONUFF THEE TRUTH! People DO NOT take the necessary time and action to heal and wonder why their relationships constantly fail! You're gonna hurt either way whether you're hurting to heal or hurting because you continue to ignore your healing process!!
The difference is the first options gives you peace and dignity the second option robs you of both of those things it's not worth it heal Ya'll ❤
I'm 36 single for 7 yrs with no kids and i approve this msg
Everyone has baggage. Its part of life. However its about how you're carrying that baggage.
When you're really aware of the baggage you carry, you let it go. People only carry baggage when they're unaware of it or don't know they can actually let it go... nobody in their right mind would carry some useless beliefs and patterns of behaviors from a past that they don't want to see repeated.
@@sunongral5605 👏🏽👏🏽
@@sunongral5605how they dont know how to let it go so they need a bit of help havent you thought about that ? Easy to say let go some people had it way worst than you
@@noneofyourbuizness That's why I studied psychology and made it my life's work to assist people in safely coming to terms with their past so they could move on to have healthy relationships with themselves and others.
@@sunongral5605i so agree
Yussssss! The labor!! The constant reassuring and emotional propping up of grown people is exhausting!
I’m so exhausted sis😂😂
You are so right it’s the same with being married to you can have it.
Exhausting asf. I can't take it.
U ain't never lied 💯
Yessss indeed! Nothing but pure exhaustion
I'm tired of dealing with Narcissistic men
single and loving it.....less stress and no drama!...i date with no commitment to anyone.
❤️❤️❤️
This is me. Been single for 9 years. Tried dating again last year and babyyyy I was in for a shocker. Being single and free and having my peace is truly where it’s at for me 🎯
Same, I agree 💯.
Same! It's CRAZY out there. After nearly 3yrs of intentionally being single, started dating again late last yr and damn, did I meet some crazy ppl. Still recovering from the trauma 😢😅.
The trick is to navigate the red flags early so you don't waste your time and you see the bullshit from a mile away
Thats riggt. Value your peace and make it your top priority. Never sacrifice your peace for anything.
Your body count must be extremely high😮
All I heard was I don’t like to be inconvenienced by a human being human. I also lack patience, empathy and understanding.
Perspective is everthing and selective....
Partially, she's speaking on no longer pulling weight for those that are not reciprocal and bring more chaos into your life. However, she seems like she also has entered emotions in general as too much labor which makes her seem apathetic and now, she's missing the point of life and humanity altogether. She basically just went from one extreme to the next. From being codependent to now being apathetic when all she needed was some good discernment and boundaries.
This is not what she said
She was speaking about both genders
To be compassionate and caring does not mean that you have to constantly interact with 30 years old brats, men or women same deal, eternal victimhood is not a goal in life
She seems like unpleasant person to be around. She’s all theory no practice. She’s “been out the game for seven years” and I’m absolutely tired of hearing about people being “healed” it’s such a subjective term at this point. Healed is now “you act in a manner that’s convenient for me”
You are definitely the kind of person she was speaking about.
To see a beautiful black woman say she's NOT a nurturing woman is utterly disgraceful 😢😢😢
Disgraceful?
Bull shite.
Its refreshing.
Why? Most of you black men lack leadership qualities, so why should she bother being empathetic?
@@shamekiawalker6358 I'm an aspiring forensic historian and I understand the plight of Our people. It's just disturbing how far the apple has fallen from the tree. So to see and hear a Black woman utter such things I mind blowing. In the Motherland a woman wouldn't even say anything like that even if she feels that way because she wouldn't even consider a man. That's like me saying I'm not about to take a homeless woman home and have her bathe and sleep next to me that very night! Why would I even bring it up. It's just a sad state foe Sistas. I'm trying to rescue my daughter from this bitchyness because I want her to have a Good Man. I raised my daughter and 2 nephews and there's plenty good men but Sistas are dillusional at best, yet I digress...U WIN 🏆 💙 😉 👏 KUDOS, I'm wrong 😆 . Love U
What she meant was not nurturing towards toxic
@jacalli the seemingly pretty lady with the unnecessary eyelashes clearly stated "I'm not a nurturing woman! That's why I'm not having no kids!" That's why the brothers are passing on these bunk ass modern women 😒. Well tell Ur friend I said 👋 because she tells u exactly what she meant, Blessings 🙌 😌
Preach. Single four years now and still not ready. Haven't spoke to a single person whose working on themselves.
Social media has missed up the dating market especially Instagram.
😮Right!!! Before social media… you met the real person. Now! You meet the fake strength and live with the weaknesses. S/M is the only platform you can pretend to be someone that you’re not. That’s why you don’t know who’s dealing with trauma base on their appearance. Check their spirit,actions more than their appearance. Don’t put a crown 👑 on a clown.🤡
@@anishawashington8970 What is S/M platform?
Social Media
Big facts
market... puked in my mouth
Was there with her until the end. It's not about being pouty.. everyone has bad days and if you can't be vulnerable with someone yes definitely stay single bc that's a healing needed
Yeah that's the vibe I got from her too. If you can't be vulnerable with your partner then you might as well not even have one
Seems like the video was played in reverse. Her rant actually came before his😂
You was with her to the end?? You should’ve had red flags raised at 7 years single lol!
Not wanting to be nurturing is also a sign that healing is needed. If you dont heal that aspect about yourself you will hurt the people you come into contact with by being too harsh and empathetic to their feelings and emotions. That is a form of emotional abuse and you should probably stay single until it is healed. The best thing to do is balance your masculine and feminine energies.
Or people can get over their "feelings" and develop a sense of structure to themselves. No one has time to be catering to another person's ego like that which is exactly what "feelings" are.
Exactly why I am still single. I totally agree with her. I am not going to walk on eggshells, so I won't set you off because you're emotionally immature. I am not going codle you and baby you. I already raised my children, and I don't want another adult child that I didn't give birth to.
She was making sense until the last part. How does she not realize that she is actually who she's talking about. She's part of the problem. I do respect her for not having children though, no one needs a mother like that.
Lack of vulnerability towards each other is what l'm seeing here.
I follow her and have been starting to notice she's kinda toxic too. She's always smiling and trying to look happy and unbothered. No one is happy all of the time. She gives me fake positive sometimes. I feel the same way as you. I was with her until she said Ima tell you to let's get some money honey as if money resolves everything. No one is saying to be codependent and nurturing to grown azz people, but she comes off as dismissive and intolerant of anything that is not "positive" or "happy" or "good vibes." You will have problems with people sometimes, they just shouldn't be explosive and unmanageable.
Its amazing how many people in these commenta didnt catch that, glad i wasnt the only one, she on that "its everyone but me even tho i do the same shit" time
@@andreablossom3929look idk who she is but im a guy and if shes giving advice to women about dating you need to unfollow her right now because she gonna be alone, other than whats been said theres nothing at all attractive about a woman whos self desceibed as not nurturing, gives "tough love", amd sees paper chasing as a solution to problems, i mean thats basically a guy were talking about, she looks pretty but acting like a dude, men and women want different things, so many women these days think by becoming like the men tbey want they are more attractive to men(some logic but they do) when it couldnt be further from the truth, i mean thats just masculine energy right there, men already gotta go out and fight the world last thing we want to do is come home and deal with "tough love" from a woman with masculine energy talking about "lets get this money", i mean if you a career woman and on your grind and thats what you want thats cool but just know that is not attractive to men at all the same way it is to women, im not even trying to be rude but that is not the recipe to be a mans peace, or rather the RIGHT mans peace, men want things too and it aint that
Yeah the … “I’m not a nurturing woman” … little cringy… screams “I have a firm wall up “ and I’m not comfortable with being vulnerable… “… don’t nobody wanna be at home with that type of energy🤷🏿♀️
My older sister told me “No one deserves you, truly.” This made me sad and I didn’t understand but now I do because after years and years of looking, I’ve found out that I have so much love and understanding to give and I’ve yet to come across someone with the same. Maybe I’m a hopeless romantic but I actually want a friend, companion AND lover….pure and strong love. It only seems to be about having an accessory, a walking wallet or s*x play-thing nowadays. It seems like a rarity to find that. I’m not looking anymore and I stopped long ago, but if it happens, then it happens. Until then, I’m at peace being single. I wouldn’t dare hurt or abandon myself like another person would ❤
You are me and I am you and this had been my whole life which explains like you said why I have been single my whole ife sadly!
Twin bestie I agree with this. Singlehood is actually better than giving your all to someone who doesn’t appreciate it. Not to mention it’s safer as these days everyone has lost their minds it seems 😅
Guys are literally thinking not to be kind to you.
Don't you see the world you've inherited?
That doesn't work for men love, I'm sorry you feel this way....
Totally agree !
Bro, maybe you should at least TRY getting a passport. There are traditional women all over Asia and many South American countries. Pretty and sweet. At worst, you get to travel and see some of the world…
Nothing wrong with being honest. She know who she is and knows what she wants. Kudos to that🧐
She is saying everything I think on a regular 😂 😂 😂 especially that last part.
I learned that most people need to be in relationships cause they don't like themselves
True. That is where they get their value from. Most people who master true self love are absolutely fine either way. That is why people who try to dog single people are such a red flag to me. Not the single person. Rather you are in a relationship or not, if you understand self love, you would not judge those people in such a negative light.
True jewelry
🎉🎉🎉🎉
@@PhoenixRise0101 Agreed.
🎯🎯🎯
She spoke all facts. All my singles that ain’t having that shit you doing right.
🤣❤️
Have fun at brunch with your single girlfriends but these are not facts…
@@IonSen06 Are you single?
@@IonSen06 what you done see is women over the age of 50 with no kids talking about how they love life unless it’s money. It’s crazy how something made up consumes them and not the power they were born with. Better make enough so you won’t get scammed by AI or put in a home because there will be no one with them in their latter years
@@IonSen06 right she talkn bout tough love lol the world is tough enough I need a woman that’s soft. Smh
We need more woman like her
No we don’t!
Hell naah!!
When you stop asking why you're depressed and start asking what you can change about yourself to get you out of that depression, is one of the starts to the healing process necessary to make you whole again.
I, by no means, am healed. Probably far from it as I have no idea where I'm truly at in the healing process, atm. But what I do know is that I already feel a lot better about who I am and starting to figure out what I want out of life. And that's the first time I can actually say that. I'm not confused and aimless like I was in my early and mid 20s. Someday I'll get there.
It's called love. When you are patient and compassionate, it's love. I know it's hard though lol
You have to love yourself, first. I mean, the Bible does say love others as you love yourself. (Yes, I know there's another rule that supercedes, off topic). If you dislike or hate yourself.....?
Indeed. She clearly doesn't have any love, though. Trouble can strike at any time and she gives me the feeling that she'll jump ship if the perfect "bank account" has some issues.
@@kathydurow6814the Bible doesn’t refer to that kind of love of self as a good thing. They meant that with our sinful nature comes this image selfishness and love of ourself and our own desires that trumps our love for others and even God. We already put ourselves first which is sin with how we have a nature that leans towards sin. When the Bible say to love others like you love yourself it is saying that just as you have a nature of loving yourself and putting your need first you must reverse that by doing that for others. Loving them by default and putting them fits their as God does the same with us. It’s good for the person to be emotionally mature though and not to put everything on you since that can be draining for a person but for Christian’s who follow the Bible this shouldn’t be a problem since we give our problems to God. I’m secular relationships that can be pretty hard though since your problems are placed on a human who also struggles.
Told someone I was going to therapy to get over previous failed friendships/relationships…was told to go get some help and I’m crazy 😅 …….I lost brain cells talking to that person.
Damned if you do damned if you don't. Fuk em do u
😂 😂😂 Me too!! When we heal/healing then we become the problem ...like what 🤷♀️
I'm just going to sit over here and mind my business lol and continue this "crazy" Healing 😊
😂😂😂
So you told someone you were getting help and they told her to get help🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣amaaaazing! I been in weekly therapy for 2 years and I’ve learned so much, people that don’t understand unpacking and healing don’t know how it spills over into over areas of life…. Parenting, personal relationships, assertiveness, work, daily duties, health and wellness, sleep and diet. My therapist even reminded me that I should be drinking more water 😂. It was great advice because I was dehydrated and didn’t realize it.
When you get a chance look into and ask your therapist about attachment styles. It really helped me understand what was going on with me and help me and my partner communicate better.
Yeah, I have to read this a couple of times, just to comprehend the imbecilic nature of the suggestion.
I hope you ran, far away from that person in hopes to never see them again.
It's emotionally exhausting to deal with somebody that's unhealed it's painful cause you can't reach them cause all of their bs is in the way. You can't even see them cause all that baggage weighing them down so much they can't even stand straight. You'll be looking around like 👀👀👀 Uuuuuuuuum helloooo are ya there!!!??🙄🤷
This girl is the reason I'm single lol. Far too many other women a lot like this, I'd rather not deal with it.
I agree that we shouldn't baby men...they need to grow up if they cannot stand strong themselves before seeking a partner. But not every man is broken or raised poorly. Some out there are really good or at least willing to learn to love themselves and others.
The part I cannot understand is the part about this lady not being nurturing at all. A couple should nurture each other as well as their kids and the family as a whole. Not being nurturing sounds alot like not wanting to give or receive true love. I enjoy nurturing my man, and he enjoys nurturing me. But, we give and take from each other in very different ways. We both acknowledge that I pulled the love out of him he never thought was there, and he has for sure made me much tougher and determined. He even made me love in deeper ways I didn't think possible.
That is toxic and anti-life to not want to give and receive the love God puts in every living thing. It helps us all grow. Women soothe men and inspire them to expanded ways of being. Healing is needed if one feels like this lady because love is what the world is all about and made of.
However, it's good this lady knows to stay out of relationships and motherhood so she doesn't hurt innocent people.
This world, notably a man's world....can make women and men feel like avoiding love. But giving into that is like waving the white flag on us female women improving the world we find ourselves in. Just because we are hated by many men that want to destroy the life in us doesn't mean we should join in the hatred... Love always prevails over evil.
LMAO YOU'RE THE MAN WHO WANTS TO BE CODDLED. .😂😂😂 CHILDISH
Don't go overseas you will find beautiful naturally feminine women who love being females and all it's attributes.
@@titeofcpt2867 we travel overseas often...men are better too.
@@titeofcpt2867 also.. My sister in law is from Holland. She just divorced my brother because he treated her like trash and is too caught up in American male culture of cheating and disrespecting women... only poor gold diggers accept that crap so if you are seeking a doormat type of female, seek one in a third world country so that she prioritizes your money over you..
My mother was emotionally immature and would constantly dump her trauma and emotions on EVERYONE. Including me. It didn't take me long to realize why both of her marriages failed and family wouldn't visit.
Get help they plant seeds in their children….when they sat the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree…. You were a sponge at birth!
Wow I needed to hear this, I’m 33 years old still single and no kids.
Same!!!!!!!!
Me too 🙌 Best decision of my life. No biological clock or offspring controlling my daily schedule
Me too
You’re not alone sis😂❤❤
@@TeraChantelle 🛑 OH MY GOD SEVEN YEARS SINCE I'VE BEEN OUT THE GAME AS WELL AND MY MODEL IS....' LET'S GET SOME MONEY HONEY!
YOU SURE KNOW WHAT YOU BE TALKIN ABOUT I LOVE IT! 💃💰💳
Happily Married here. AFTER my personal healing, I met the love of my life and after 12 years, we are still going strong.
I've been single for 10 years because I'm terrible happened to me and I wanted to make sure that I was perfectly capable of emotional understanding before I even thought about trying to get into another relationship. About 5 years into being single. I realize people kind of suck so I remained single for another 5 years but on top of that I became celibate because I wasn't going to deal with that crap either. So this woman just said what was in my heart.
This is so true too many hurt people out here hurting people.
Amen to that..
She sure looooves hearing herself ... which is a blessing (to her), because she will remain by herself.
For real
Out the game meaning you hit the wall must have a dog i bet she does
Y’all are just proving her point lol and what exactly is she missing out on? Men like you with sparkling personalities?
But she didn't say one lie no idea why people are always so quick to attack someone.
@@shamekiawalker6358she's egotistical heartless and lazy
THANK YOUUUU!!!! Whining get on my nervessss 😭✋🏽
😂🏌🏽♀️
If you live in the past you miss the beauty of the future.
True indeed. I have two jobs already, I don't need a third.
Yeah I used to date when I was unhealed. Now that I am healed I just want to be left alone. Imagine that. There are lots of people who need healing. I'd rather be healed and single than in a relationship while broken. My ex told me the other day "when I met you 18 yrs ago I knew you had some problems" I was like "what the feck so you preyed on me in a weak time". Ladies do not get out there before the healing can take place.
Wow me too. U wanna date?
Wow, OMG the nerve of him. I always believed they do know and you just confirmed this. They like predators preying on next victim. Smh. Well, just know the woman you are today he could never do that to you again and if you met him for the 1st time now you would not be interested. He hating on you mad because you are so much healed that you would stay in bad place but you won the battle. He sounds ike a narcissist . Stay strong 💪. Much love my fellow Warrior Sis. ❤️
She ain’t lying some men and women have too much baggage to be in a relationship fr fr !!
It can be hard to spot those suffering from victimhood, but after you do, and you tried your best, if it is disturbing your peace and dragging you down, walk away... you literally spoke my mind 😂🙏🏿
Ladies it's all about HIGHERING your Standards. All Men are not DUSTIES!
*raising
Its about putting in the work in a relationship that u want , not "finding" its not a easter egg hunt or hide and seek .
Men and women are literally dusties, God made dirt and dirt don’t hurt❤️🩹
LOL women are giving away their cookies for free these days. Why should men commit when women are easy? No respect for themselves.
I was with her until the last point... No I don't build your self confidence... But at the same time I'm not too full of myself to not let you cry on my shoulder and not be there in a time of need. That's how I build trust, can I cry around you for a moment before going to conquer life again. (of course not to every issue, and for weeks on end lol).
I absurd agree with her conclusions, but not her premises. You have to work on your pain, but coddling and hand holding aren't the worst things to come out of people spewing their pain onto you.
Yeah she talking bout tough love when the world is hard enough for a man smh. I need a soft woman, she’s gonna be single for a long time. Nobody is getting any younger
@@RicardoCray ….see, you JUST proved what todays women have been saying about these men saying that they want a feminine or “soft” woman.
Y’all want a feminine or “soft” woman to stroke your ego, NOT to really help you.
A feminine woman can show tough love. Think about Claire Huxtable or even the step mother “Dee” on the show Moesha. Neither, of those women played the radio with their children (or husbands) but they were damn good women and very feminine and loving, and they were educated and hardworking.
( I know these people are fictional characters, but I wanted to give you examples of feminine women showing tough love and believe me, there are a large amount of women in the real world who are the same).
@@RicardoCray hopefully you’ll also be soft with her
I feel you, i don't coddle, but i will never not be nurturing, that was in me before i had a child.. that's like loyalty, you either are or you aren't, certain circumstances shouldn't make you unloyal, just like heartbreak shouldn't make you less nurturing
This is exactly what they mean when they talk about “healing.” It’s code for wanting an easy relationship where they think they’re free of being responsible for how they relate to another person and how they’re own behavior may cause another person to feel. She wants a person that doesn’t exist. Humans have emotions that we have to learn how to deal with through compromise in a relationship.
Why dose her voice sound so precious
I had a teacher about 30 35 and she looks just like and sounds like her. My teacher helped through my lowest time and just hearing her voice gives me so much comfort ❤
Her voice is like nails down a chalkboard! If you relate to her you too are also damaged!
Everybody thinks their trauma is the most traumatic, and everybody's looking at each other to take the lead.
I just appreciate the fact that she stated that she is not a nurturing person so she's not having kids and staying single. She was honest on every level. I approve her message. She kept it real on her end. Nothing wrong with that. ✅
Thank you sis 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Once you work towards your healing you don’t even want to entertain these folks 💯
I
Its like an allergy to toxicity
“healing” is just a word ran through women use to avoid men. You can tell she was ran through by how cold hearted she was at the end. A woman who aint nurturing is a damaged woman. Ironic how she hasnt dates in years yet is unhealed herself 😂
You totally missed the point of this video. 😅
@@motalkbadazslook little male, I had s e x only once when I was 23 and it freaked me out how the guy wanted to spend all his time with me and started talking about a life together, it was gross. I'm 47 now and I haven't touched a male ever since. Males just want a replacement mommy, it's honestly creepy.
Amen girl!! Men wanted the independant woman in the 90's. Now that we are independant, they seem to act more like a female these days.
I think she is absolutely right. I like her attitude
True. Being someone who has done the work (and committed to continuing the work) while being with someone who hasn’t is exhausting. Truly. When vetting, make sure you know clearly what type of work they have done, if any. If they can’t articulate it and demonstrate self-awareness and accountability, RUN. Don’t walk.
Dating and relationships aren’t bad. Our vetting skills are… and self-awareness.
I agree. And have fun! But if u cant articulate or I dont see it buh-bye unapologetically
Start healing yourself and watch others heal around you✨️✨️✨️
Social media has made everyone a philosopher. Now everybody knows the answer to all of life's problems.
Exactly ❤honey❤❤❤let’s gets some money! Single life is the best ever❤❤🎉
I’m 47 now and I wish I had run into more queens like this when I was in my prime but, it’s all good I’m here now behind the 8 ball and I know it’s never to late. Let’s get it ♎️gang
Gang gang forevaaaa❤
The ship sailed circa your 20s, you’re verrrrry late😂😂😂
Sis we are more than biological age!!! We are infinite, spiritually!!! Live you life no matter what!!!
@ 47 you're still in your prime, with lots of years & goals ahead.👸🏽
YEP!!! I was to much of a "nurturer, & giver" & it didn't get me anywhere...me at 53 & still single!!! I have to hold bk now, & let someone elses actions prove they are worth it, etc ..
I need a drink after hearing her try to say I’m above all y’all yet what she says ends up describing herself
I see too many people that radiate red flags and too many people that come off as arrogant, annoying, or obviously in need of their own help. I have stuff im working through as well and I want someone I meet to also be someone who understands the journey so we can support one another instead of feeling like I have to walk on eggshells to avoid hurting someone’s ego or triggering their insecurities. Until then I’m fine being alone and not dealing with the bullshit
Yes ma'am!!!! Ppl need to heal before they go and try to find a partner. Having partner should add to your life, not try to fill a hole in it :D
I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU!!! Alot of people bring baggage into new relationships meanwhile they STILL haven't healed yet. Someone can get married to you, have kids with you and be preaching " I'VE MOOOOVED OOONNN" but still heavily think and wish it was their ex that they did all stuff with. Many people haven't moved on and that's why I'm staying single and childfree.✌🏽
Just cause you found someone "new" or " better", doesn't mean you've moved on( atleast for some people )
C’mon NOW!!!💯💯 single & childfree is the way to beeee😏
Wise decision
This!!
Well it's been a year for me but I'm working on me. I'm not jumping into another relationship until I am healed from bs of life😂
Never have a relationship with some one like this. Just go straight to divorce court.
She's speaking facts. I was just fine when I was single. Relationships are exhausting!😢
Get 🐕 🐈 ks hits
Looking in from Europe, America has some beautiful educated sisters that have their purpose locked down. International travel is good for both brothers and sisters though, it casts the net wider and potentially provides a different perspective !
That’s what it is. The sisters out here have there professional purposes locked in and they are beautiful but dating isn’t really in the cards out this way.
We are starting to look beyond our borders because other parts of the world have figured a few things that America sure hasn’t.
@@amiyrbarclift1640 - Agreed 100%. Wonder what that is?
@@lettingyouknow1 International Travel is the way. It's time for us to extend our reach here in the US. Possibly Europe as well.
What this comes off as to me, ironically, is someone who hasn't learned to accept things as they are. Choosing to be out the game, if not for being in a relationship, because everyone is insecure is choosing to ignore the crux of humanity. It's not about satisfying the ego, it's about being with someone who understands their flaws and is working on it in a manner that is productive.
What one will find - in their journey at least (I hope) - is that accepting things as they are does not give emotional baggage. In that same token, it does not also make one absolve themselves of their human feelings like what she is attempting to say here. Just because you're free of emotional baggage and accepting of things as they are doesn't mean you still won't have regrets and occasional breakdowns. It just means that you'll understand what they are and allowing yourself to feel them all the way through will help with the heal - until the scar opens back up again.
My point is that people are always going to be insecure. There's a lot more points I can make in critique of this notion, but have doctor things to worry about. If you read to this point, have a great day
Being single is the way to resolve immaturity, bcuz immaturity is a barrier to real love and relationships. Try to go near a person and it's that person's immaturity you're going near and not the actual person him or herself.
The beauty of staying single until you’re ready, is growth! I feel so very blessed to be able to spot bs a mile away and I’m not settling… period!!! There is a good amount of decent single people that are healed, finances together, health on point, careers together, positive vibes, and kids grown!!! We need to start a group!!!
they don't heal they just slide throughout their life 💯 🤧
💯🎯
Finally someone is honest !!!!!!
7 years and she look all happy with clear skin
Facts...there's no point being in a relationship and being overwhelmed by it. I can't be dating you and be your therapist at the same time.
Single = no baggage! I rather be single! ♥️She’s definitely speaking facts on both men and women!
Insecurity is a self-defense skill. You out there watching the game instead of fullfilling your wifely duties. It's called "Marrigae" meaning working and thriving in this world together. You can't get no money alone. The struggle is real.
IT'S BETTER TO BE SINGLE AND BE AT PEACE THAN HAVE HELL IN YOUR OWN HOME.
And a lot of these folks are married in side relationships making everybody life hell… I love this video and she is beautiful I hope she finds a good help mate ✨
Even us nurturers not about to enable the bs or coddle you "lets get some money honey" 🤣🤣🤣
And here I’m am leaving a toxic relationship, trying to get more in tune with self and God, to one day love again. Everyone not toxic
Being emotianally supportive would make a good spouse cuz some people need love, moms do that...
You are 💯 correct. So many people walking around wounded or broken- don’t love themselves so how can they truly love you
Single 11 years and this solidarity and peace is my everything ❤
12 yrs strong. I'm not in a hurry for the wrong one
Respect,always build together & if there's toxicity remove it,that sh!t aint good for noone
She sounded "unhealed" from the jump. When she said she was seven years single I said "incoming coping"