Why I'm Choosing Not To Have Kids | Childfree Lifestyle
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- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- #Nokids #Childfreelifestyle #Childfree
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Tera Chantelle is a Self-Love & Brand coach, author, film producer, writer, podcast/talk show host, and inspirational speaker who is passionate about helping others to believe in themselves and soar through their fears and hurdles. She is epitomized by creative thinking, brilliant intuition and insight.
People would probably be shocked how many childfree women use to work at day care centers or as nannies.
It takes a village literally 🤣
I was a substitute teacher. I volunteered to take turns sitting in the nursery in a church where I used to be a member. I actually was paid to do that for another church. I was a boxing coach that worked with kids and teens. Those experiences solidified my decision not to be a parent.
Or raise packs of nieces and nephews during the summer and weekends. Chile three or more at a time GANG GANG. I have 30 nieces and nephews and this is the first 3 years of my life where no shorties around
Or was a teacher. Or raised other people’s kids.
@@azizacredbyrd498 same here ..been raising cousins from age 9 and now nieces and nephews at 33. I'm tired and just waiting for my peace
The world would be such a great place if everyone understood that the ability to reproduce does not mean should.
Facts
Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it
@@anashesithole240 If that was the case then he would’ve made all women physically able to…but he didn’t….so what about those women?
@anashesithole240 Also, don't take it so literally. Can you not find other ways to be fruitful, I.E. by drawing more people to Christ and expanding his flock? There's more than one way to achieve results, mindlessly creating potential degenerates in your gods name doesn't seem to have been working out for you all quite well now, has it?
@@anashesithole240 just go buy some fruit.
As someone that works with children, it’s the best abstinence training you’ll ever get 😂
As an aunt...what you said lol
Right! lol.
🤣🤣😂😂😂
Just close your legs.
lol
Through some accidental quirk in my life, I was never "blessed" with children. When I come home and open the door, do you know what I hear? Silence. 😊
You know where all my monies go? On my hobbies and the cats (furry little resource draining bellends.) You know what time I woke up this morning? 9.30 am. You know what I can watch on the tele in the middle of the day? Spongebob, but that's only cos I like it 😂
😂😂😂🤭that's gone piss people with children off but same here 😂
@@HEYBESTFRIENDHEYYY I stopped caring about that years ago (childfree uncle and content being so)!
@@thomasshort1784 Any advice on how to find men who want to be in a child-free relationship?
But that silence is bliss tho
When I was a nanny/preschool teacher. “You’re so good with kids, you’re going to be a great mom one day” mm mm my momma always told me not to take your work home with you 🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣
☠️😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂🤣😂😂
Lol 😂
Lol.
30 year old man and I’m not planning on having kids either. There’s nothing here for them and i like my freedom. That family stuff doesn’t excite everyone. I wonder if I’ll get the same responses: that I’m selfish, will regret it or “missing my purpose.” Since y’all love going in on these women.
Appreciate ya!🥹💯
Oh damn, you went there!!! Love it!! 🤣
Yo I think the reason y u may not get those comments is cus it’s what’s been normailsed as men. It’s either the “your gonna die unloved sad broke and alone stereotype or playboy who may for now be messing around, just to end up sad and alone with nothing but items to see you off when ur done from here stereotype. Basically, we’re used to keeping those men in the parts of society we don’t care about and don’t pay attention to. And I think the ability to give birth is a key factor why ppl don’t care for those men. But with women u might be taken aback that they may not have that natural desire for such things that they have the ability to do. A home can become even more intimate when kids are involved as they reveal more about you as a person that u man not have know before in yourself and each other(your partner). Majority of the time those relationships who don’t desire such a family tend to just end up being f buddies till you get bored abd move on top you’re next partner as there ain’t nothing much solid keeping you both together and finding love through the tings giving you that sense of responsibility.
@@Unknown-lc8cy … ok.
I hope you can visit a nursing home for elderly people who are alone,without kids and on their dying bed.Some even died,with no one showing up.Then maybe you can change your thinking.
I'm 40, never been pregnant. Love my life. This world is shit, I'm not bringing a human being into this.
Sis, you’re 40. It’s too late anyway.
@@RaffineDebauche I wasn't saying I'm planning on it
@@natashka1982 You said “I’m not bringing a human being into this” like you have a choice.
@@RaffineDebauche it was hypothetical...
@I Notary same!
36. No kids. Life is quiet. Freedom is priceless. My peace is a non-negotiable! 💯👁✨💫
same when you go to mental institution, youll have a lot of pece
@@user-ep7yi1ie1qu will get there first 😂
This. Freedom is the theme of my life.
"But who's gonna take care of you when you're old?" Is that the only reason you had kids!!?
Nursing home
Good retirement plan. And a lawyer
@@qarenlee254 None of those people will care about you like your children will, so plan for a lot of bed sores and neglect.
No, but it’s not a bad reason to have on the LIST of reasons to have children.
Not a bad one.
@@qarenlee254 LOL, have you ever been in a nursing home?
I'm 54 years young with no kids. I knew in highschool, I never wanted kids. I didn't want the responsibility. No regrets. Kudos to those that do.
There was this girl I was working with when I was 24. She was a single mom of 2 kids. I was cool with her for about a decade, and she would sporadically ask me when I'm going to have kids. I couldn't understand why she would care to ask me about something so personal. 🤔
@@verystylishordinarypeople maybe she wanted y’all both to have kids, you know like it’s not just her being a single mom, doing it all by herself. In my opinion she probably felt alone in a way cuz she has the kids and you didn’t. Past coworkers did that to me too, rushing me to have a kid at 23 then at 25 and now again at 27..ughhh I’m not in a rush to have a child lol
@@worldofmango1409 neither was I. Then, first (and only!) kid at 40. Decided it was a now or never situation. Only regret is that I’m super jaded and set in my ways and have much less patience than I would’ve had at 25 or 30.
As you said you still young and I promise you, one day you'll wish you had one while you could
@Dulcey Blow …I never wanted children either & now I’m 48 yrs old. Now I think of things like “who’s going to take care of me in my old age? Does that ever cross your mind? Just asking, not trying to be confrontational
I'm 46 and Childfree. It's wonderful. Being able to travel, experiencing new things, meeting new people, saving money and my favorite, THE PEACE AND QUIET!!! Parenthood is not for everyone. It's a lifetime commitment and is the hardest job to ever take on. I have great respect for parents. Having the freedom to develop myself is various ways is exhilarating ❤
True
This is the life I want
Having a child or children doesn't stop anyone from enjoy life and having all that you have. Its just who will be enjoying those things that you have accomplished once you're gone. Its about how you plan your life. Many women don't plan, they meet a man who looks good, they date for a short while, get in bed, get an unplanned pregnancy, and Then the baby daddy drama,, because they didn't do their homework on the man, who probably was someone else's husband. Some of us who have children, have just as much happiness and quite times, accomplishements, vacations, and fun times as the single ones, with our spouses.
@@jenny-im9gc having kids does stop one from having - as OP stated, her “favorite thing” - peace and quiet. Sure, you can have a wonderful life with kids, but if you’re just not built to be a parental figure, then you’re just not built for it. And that’s okay, and actually really great to admit. Versus the latter of having children and then scarring them for life because the parent never wanted them to begin with.
I really encourage more people admitting when they don’t want to be parents. Life is about more than just having kids.
@@gingwhatt having children doesn't stop anyone from having what they want in life. When you don't plan for them they become a burden when they are young. Children grow up and become positive contributors in society. Children are not meant to give birth to and placed in a box until they grow up. If you want to be a spokes person for women who wishes to not have kids, its you poragative, but making the assumption that women with children cannot enjoy life is false. Many women are with men who have somehow convinced them that having children is a bad idea, and later they regret it. Be an objective critique without bias.
I recently told a guy who was trying to flirt with me that I don’t want kids. He looked genuinely confused and asked if I was planning to be a nun. The look on his face said it was an honest question. He didn’t realize there were more options other than ‘mother’ and ‘nun.’ Ps, he had four kids.
😂
My word lols
Lol, this is hilarious 😂
Nothing wrong being a nun either. They are cool.
He shouldn't be on a date if he has 4 kids
50 and no kids raised 7 nieces and nephews I’m good!
Amazing🥹🫶🏽
I look up to women like you🥹🥹
I'm 60...I knew when I was 17 I didn't want children. I was called everything but a child of God 🙄 When I was young, it use to bother me, but that didn't change my mind. You'll be just fine without the struggle 😉
I’m 47 never been pregnant (for all you pro lifers out there) and I do not want children because the human situation is overrated
@@audreymay9378 😂👏🏽👏🏽
People love to sag black women down with kids! It should be no surprise that more black women have decided to remain childfree considering how many single moms are In our community. Black single moms are treated horribly, yet they constantly want more of us to sign up for it! I literally just had a girl in her 20s tell me I look so young (I’m 37), and when I told her that I’m childfree, she said, “no wonder you look so young lmao) 🤣
OOH GIRL YES AND WHEN PEOPLE SEE THAT YOU DON'T HAVE KIDS THEY AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME IT'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH US HELL NAW WE'RE JUST NOT WANTING THEM IT'S OKAY TO NORMALIZE WANTING TO BE CHILD FREE AND NOT HAVE KIDS BY ANYONE
A LOT OF SINGLE WOMEN AND IT'S LIKE A FAD NOWADAYS
It sounds like the solution to this is simply getting married first... but ok.
@@louisbatchelor5546 since when did marriage save black women from single motherhood? Men have historically left their wives and still made them single mothers. I know a few personally myself, so I know for a fact that this happens all of the time
@@alicia7737 Men don't just leave. Women facilitate reasons
I'm 61, my husband and I chose a kid free life. Throw in a cremation at the end, and it's like we were never here. We call it "No trace living". Happy, wealthy, and wise.
🤣🤣🤣The only difference between you and me is that I've also lived a single life, so there's no husband to vouch that I was here. True trace-free living. 😂😂😂
Who’s going to bury you? Carry your casket? The world probably better off without another version of you guys anyway so, god speed……
@American Hero You cannot speak for every person. It my be your greatest reason for being alive, but many women feel that's not the case for them. I say that traveling the world is one of the greatest reasons to be alive - traveling along the Nile River in a felucca, trekking through the Amazon Jungle, sleeping on a sand dunes in the Sahara Desert. That's one of my passions. Do you know how many women regret marriage and motherhood?
@American Hero Actually, I've been to more than 30 countries and 5 continents, and counting. It's not that unusual, except among blk men who have a hood mentality, who think their way of life is the only way of life for blk folks. I never wanted a husband or kids. It was just never a desire for me. You live the life that brings joy to you, not the life others expect you to live.
You think you're being debasing with your comment to me, but you just sound ignorant. The fact that you think that only a blk person who's in the military has the ability or accessibility to travel the world is just an ignorant way of thinking. That says more about you than it does me.
You also have that typical blk male toxicity in which blk men compare themselves to blk women instead of other men. It's very feminine. A man's experience having children is obviously very different than a woman's and a very different kind of physical sacrifice. Stop comparing yourself to women.
@@rufushughes4331 Nothing wrong with that! You're a lot more responsible than these baby daddies or husbands who leave it up to their wives to do most of the child rearing.
20 years travelling Europe as a nanny. No kids of my own,no regrets
This is the DREAM🥂
I would never give you a job as Nanny,
@@user-ep7yi1ie1q you couldn't afford me
People try to guilt me into having children, but when I tell them I travel the world full time, they tell me they wish they could do that as well... only they have children. Go figure...
Society has been trying to guilt people out of having kids since the 1960s. And according to birth stats in the west its working.
That must be a lie I travel with kids. I’m a parent and I believe a child doesn’t stop you from doing anything. My child is 3 and been too 3 different countries. I know people my age who have no responsibility(children) and haven’t even travel outside their tri state area.
Really, that's what I want to do too. Travel the world full time.so may I ask you what it is that you do, when you travelling the world? Am so intrigued
@@Gjfdyo5786 I'm a freelance translator 🙂
But when your on your deathbed alone with no one to call or on your side do you think it would suffice? I understand waiting but to not want kids period is an obvious sign of selfishness and with that being said the world is probably better off without generations of your kind anyways
First of all the world is a shitshow.
Literally 🤣🤣
🔥😂
And splendid at the same time.
🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂
Ok. I always say I would not purposefully bring my children here.
Same here! I’m 29, single, and child free. I don’t need anymore stressors in my life that the world hasn’t already caused for me.
Okaaay 👏👏👏
Once most y'all get old will regret. Wait for it
@@sullaybjr
You shouldn’t speak for anyone but yourself. There is no point predicting how people you don’t know will feel when they get older. Although it’s hard for some people to believe not every woman is built with a maternal yearning to have children and be a mom. Although humans have the ability to breed doesn’t mean ever human has to or will.
@@audreymay9378 I said what I said. Time will reveal 😌
@@sullaybjr
lmao 😂
Yes I choose this as well. My life is extremely peaceful and I love it.
Let’s talk bout it😂💯
People seem to worry more about females not wanting to have kids but not concerned about all these children who are abused by the parents....and these same people don't adopt, be foster parents or volunteer at orphanages.
Stay out of our uterus...we love our freedom.
HIGH FIVE
They will stay out especially if you keep your legs closed.
@@VELLLSails 👍
@@VELLLSails I didnt know they speak through the thing I have between my legs. My goodness! I wonder hoe th blood tastes like every month
@@bread2951 what? Who is they speaking through your privates? Do you mean lust? Makes it too hard to keep em closed? Not following
Some ppl don't want the responsibility. Especially the ones who've grown up babysitting and caring for other kids. Lol just watching was enough 🤣🤣
it's not fun at all lolol
@@TeraChantelle lol exactly. The crying, the tantrums, and don't even get me started on the parents I done seen😅😅😅
True! I literally only like children when they’re newborns up to a year after that. Eh! 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️ I do love children, don’t get me wrong but the way this world is heading along with the responsibility of raising a child or children is DIFFICULT! I don’t even know if I want to be married or not.
@@rx_4746 exactly, responsible for me and only me lol
Exactly!!
That gorgeous smile! You go girl. I ain't having kids either. NOPE! Stay strong!
She's so fine there's no telling where the money went, lol! Childfree for life!
Appreciate you sis!❤️
It's the smart ones who need to have kids. Its so backwards
@@vanderumd11 🥹😂😂💯
Stay single, stay alone, and when you die stay the last piece to your family tree branch on your side.. this is not staying strong it's staying stubborn stupid
I am married and we are child free. You wouldn’t believe how many times I tell people this and they ask, “Is he cool with it?” 🙄
I don’t understand why people are shock men are cool with it. These men don’t want these kids either. That’s why they walk out on them 50 percent of the time.
I don't want kids either. I don't think it's weird.
I'm a guy though. Planning on getting a vasectomy.
R u sure
U have necessary and nephews?
Once u find the right one that's gonna take care of u .. u will
Then when your 50 looking at kids in the park telling yourself man maybe a family would've been nice,but I'm happy for you my guy adoption is there too.
Do it I don’t want kids nothing is wrong with you not wanting kids. Don’t let people tell you that you should have kids.
Mens goals in life is to stress out as many women as possible. Giving them children is one of those goals!
Right
I will never understand why that’s mens goal tbh🫤
😂 it’s true
Try to give me a kid if you want…I’ll give that kid to Jesus EXPEDITIOUSLY.
I am SO GLAD someone else sees this. The number one way to trap, subjugate, and control women is to tie them down with babies. Motherhood is nothing but a trick bag, so y'all better be darn sure that is what YOU really want before signing on because the men who wanted the babies WILL most definitely leave you high and dry to chase after the next chick with no kids and a banging body. FACTS!!!
Can we just take a moment to acknowledge how beautiful her teeth are😍😍😍😍
Yes...yes we can
Came to the comments to say that lol
Absolutely ✨✨
No
Simp but true
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 “I’m just too gangsta fa da kids!”
Ikr 😂
FACTS THOUGH 🤭🫣🤣😂👌🏾💪🏾💯💯
At 40 my family finally stopped asking lol enjoy your child free life 💕
So your telling me I have to wait 10 years for them to stop asking 😟
@@ThatZeeZee yes it depends on how old you was when you had a kid my brother is 18 already and my mom is 36 she gad him when she was 16
At 40 Your lying ms just say nobody was willing to spend 18 years with you 🤣🤣🤣
@@prophetkai8604 you do understand the goal of childfree women is to make it past your most fertile years without getting trapped?
@@vangoghsotherear4114 most fertile is not the same as non fertile. I'm pretty sure you get it.
As a Mom, I don’t recommend having children. The teen years damn near took me out. Enjoy your child-free existence! 💜💜💜
Thank you love!
A friend with a kid told me the same thing and I'm forever grateful to her for helping solidify my decision to not have children. More mothers should be open and honest about their experience raising kids.
It took me working as a teacher to realize I didn’t want kids. And this is true for a few other women that I know 😂. The amount of kids I’ve had that come from homes with parents that have no business having kids is just sad.
Same here sis. I was a teacher and that was all the birth control I needed. 🤣
She knows what she wants and is honest about it. A true adult
I'm struggling mentally with 3 kids, I can TOTALLY understand why people don't want kids 😂
Finally someone that is honest. People act like the goal in every single person's life should be cranking out kids. If you want to spend your money, energy and limited time on this earth raising and chasing after kids that is entirely your business and choice to make. Nothing is wrong with that life, but people should understand that it is not meant for everybody.
Where is the men ???
@@percyastronautstatus.8780 MIA....in the wind.
@SiArra Williams what
I can't Believe there's still honest people in the world... I pray you receive the strength you need to push through...
Once you have a kid you can't return it so understand why people won't admit it's stressful, they don't want to sound like they regret thier kid
What is the first question a grown woman gets asked?
“Do you got kids?”
Hell no. That usually ends the conversation. Like ALL conversation.
Literally 🤣
haha
Or if a woman is sick, the question is, “are you pregnant?”
Right folks get mad- “WhY yOu SaY iT lIkE tHaT”? CUZ I AINT!! It’s not even about not being able to do stuff- my folks stayed on road trips and I was there🤷🏽♀️. It’s as simple as errbody don’t need kids- EVER or just at the moment. Mental stability is way more important because them babies do NOT care about what they got on. Most people who ask why we say what we say or say it in that tone are PRIME EXAMPLE of what we mean!! It also breaks off into so many different branches nobody has time to sit and converse about in one day🤦🏽♀️!
If a man and it is always a man asking hears that and you are of a certain age then he is like "she aint my type" so why bother?
This is facts!! Working with children since 18. I was taking care of my siblings since I was 7. Noooo thank you!!!!! Child free here!!💯👏🏾
Cheers to Freedom Sis!!
“Needless to say, the kid snitched on me and I got fired”😭😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
Nope? Not the kid, the snitch snitched on her 😂
Worthless woman
Lmao that part got me good 😂 he gonna tell no matter what he's a snitch to the end kids are so funny
30, single, and childfree by choice!! 🙌🏽
It’s truly amazing to be able to make this choice for my self, my well-being, and my future.
There's no future without children one day you'll be 70 80 years old in a nursing home with no family and you'll die alone if you don't have kids just think about it you're sacrificing something beautiful
Lets talk if we ever make it to 60,
I will wait to know if you are still happy?!
By choice huh… No one wants to die alone
@@MrBroderickg14 Deadass😂just the fact she threw in “single” makes me suspicious about her “well being”. She must have enough cats to fill the void.
Come talk to us when your sixty and, your cats are eyeing you for their next meal.
So nice to see a black woman say this 😍😍😍
Ah! let's step into our power sis!
@@TeraChantelle 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Why?
@@ConsciousFBA because we are the leading ethnic group for having babies out of wedlock so its nice to see a black woman say she doesnt want to be a statistic
@@ConsciousFBA Some black women are woke and don't want to live their lives as baby mamas. That's WHY!!!
Omg I be telling people this too, I worked with kids for 5years, I watched my nieces and nephews & now I work at a pediatric office lol I don’t want kids at this point. & im the only one out of 5 without kids 😂. I’m a Plant Dad & soon a pet Dad too lol
😂 Awww, at least you know
Notice how theirs no males in the comments attacking you for your decision lmao
Love this xo
I'm a fur mom and I love it
The pet parent life is incomparable. All the benefits of kids without many of the stress
You look pretty stress free. Having kids can be very stressful. I'm really glad you actually made a well thought out plan.
Thinking for yourself is a power move.
Shit.... Me going to school was enough for me. Even when i was a kid i didn't really like them. Lol
Why would anyone want to purposely bring a child here into this world now🤦🏾♀️😂
This a real question. I feel guilty for bringing the ones here I got. I would never even think about having another child as trash as this world is.
@@jordanbratcher6881 Never feel guilty about having children, childs are
Gods blessing to world
@@jordanbratcher6881 imagine them reading this they deserve better🤦
@LT I don’t care who or who doesn’t want to have kids. They can do what they want with their life, let them have as many kids as they want but all I’m saying is, there is no way I would ever want to bring a child into this world the way it is now. People can take my comment however they want. It doesn’t affect me🤷🏽♀️
@@123lxxx6 they deserve better than an honest parent who has the empathy to see how hard her childrens future will be and the sense and decency not to subject even more children to this terrible world?
That's ok, you don't have to. I just had this conversation with my daughter, and she doesn't want to either.
❤️❤️❤️
I’m so glad to see women Living childless lives. We don’t have to be “baby mamas”😭😭 kids are trifling
Let's be free baby lol
Not kids are trifling…🤣🤣🤣
I. Mean why be a baby momma when you could be a wife with children
@@jaythebadguy6984 not everybody’s goal is to be married😅
@@jaythebadguy6984 Same thing you’re a mother to someone’s kids💀💀
Even in my 20s I knew I didn't want children. I work in a children's home now and that decision is now set in stone.
Just dont get old. Go work in a nursing home and you will see why you should have yr own familyy.
@@cgreen777 no she won’t. Plenty with kids don’t get visited either.
@@cgreen777 stay mad in¢el. 😂 Youre so sad
From a man perspective Misery love company people we live in moderns times relationships is not what is all cracked up to be why would this woman take the chance to become a single mother either through a marriage / long-term relationship.. please don't do it live life and age gracefully
Finally a man with something positive to say to a childfree woman. THANK YOU.
@@rarejewel9678 Because he's knows how his genders is and what they say when women aren't around. He knows what his gender is capable of doing base off his own actions or what he sees and hear during barbershop talk = male gossipping time.
This is a bad faith argument.
@@MrsNicolas quit blaming men for women’s decisions. Somehow you think “his gender” men are the problem when you know what your gender is capable and you’ve heard them talk and you side ain’t clean. Women cheat more and black wines have had 1.2 million more children than black men have sired in the last 10 years so don’t blame men. Women been making their own decisions and we see the results of that.
@@michealmajor7883 blah blah blah. Paternity testing is screwed. So telling me about BW "possibly" having more children than BM is pointless. In addition, from a biological standpoint, they'll always be more women with children than men. So you really tried it with that one🤣 please go do that with someone who doesn't understand science because that was straight sad and pathetic.
There is no such thing as “ you must do it this way “ It’s your life ❤️
STRAIGHT FACTS THOUGH 🤞🏾🫶🏾💪🏾💯💯💯
I feel you sister. I get questioned like this everyday also. You’re 28, & no kids? Um yes. I always tell people, I’ll have kids when I get married.
That’s my same spiel, I feel that’s the best way to bring a child into this toxic world. Other then that child free for me
I’m starting to that people who ask these questions are so empty inside and are very shallow with no substance. I swear they don’t have anything else better to do like go head on please 🤚🏾‼️
🙌🙌🙌
I personally never wanted children. I didn’t want to give up my freedom.
You don't understand at all. Having children GIVES you freedom to pass along your life and your love to someone else. I marvel at the self-absorbed selfishness in this comment section.
Bright side: it's a lot more interesting than listening to that narcissist woman yapping about me,me,me.
@@Chris-gl8um I've lived out my 'opinion'. You?
@@Chris-gl8um honestly in 2022 it’s very selfish I agree .. the world is horrible n most ppl with kids regret it but love the kid .. some resent they kids .. most mistreat them .. I rather not
@@jeffreygranger6913 Actually Narcissism is more common in MEN. Go figure!!!
@@rarejewel9678 Hard to tell but I'll take your word for it.
I told my boyfriend to just leave me if he wants kids. I’ll be so satisfied with life if I can at least know he is doing great and his kids are too 😊
Love this for ya🥰
I'm too lazy to have kids and I accept it proudly. I love sleep and movie night too much lol 😂✊
You're not lazy, you're just sane 👍
@@KosmoRedRevhow does that make them little girls? at least they’re honest
@@KosmoRedRevyou sound stupid. I know way too many adults who do NOT take care of their children.. druggies etc who aren’t adult enough to admit that kids are not for them. Try again.
@@AN-no4zk its also called sane that one adult doesn't want to take care of an child because of long sleeping... So it was my fault sorry. Am just a silly mother.
Y'know, I experience stagnant depressive periods too, but I don't lie to myself and pretend they're fun.
Whenever I go on a date I always get asked “why don’t you have kids?”, I don’t want to be the 3rd or 4th baby mama, this world is insane, and I love my peace. I have a nephew, little brother, and I’m a God Mom of 3. I’m good for a while 😅😅
I'm a man and tell them the same thing you tell them when the ask me !
@@blackw369 🤣🤣 ijs
This comment...then in the end of the day you are in circles of baby daddy baby mama issues that aren't ending
@@jayneakinyi1992 Nah I’m good love, enjoy lol. I watch my mother and younger sister go through that (still are) and I want no parts of that in my life
@@Yeaits_Katt I have an ex who was highly insulted that I didn't want to be with him because he has 4 baby mamas ( When we were dating back in school, he didn't have children yet.). His response to me was, " you're not perfect, and I would give you a chance". Granted, I do have my negative baggage, but it's not multiple baby daddy baggage, and in his mind, my baggage even out his multiple baby mama baggage. 😬🤦🏽♀️
As a matter a fact, I have a few exes that of course didn't have kids in highschool, but 10 years later have multiple baby mamas within that span. They come back, see that you're still single and think they have a chance. 🙄
Worked as a teacher for six years. Loved the time I got to teach, but it me realize I don't want to have a child in my life for the rest of my life. My sister and friends complain when their kids are around and then miss them when they're not around. That's too much for me, because I'm struggling to want myself around all the time 😂.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Suicidal thoughts are something everyone has at one time or another thought out life..we are human and we have questions some that can’t be answered but to face the unanswered is what it means to be human
nothing about having kids makes me want any, but more power to the mothers! I feel like they either take it personally or think you’re selfish when you say you don’t want any and that’s ok with me 😌
they do but who gives a fuck...funny thing is none of em gone help you take care of the responsibility
Baybee, people have selfishness misunderstood! If more people were selfish, they would not be running around trying to make other people do things to make them feel whole… Every Human Needs to go within and know him or her SELF. For each individual that works on Self, that is an individual that works on ALL OF HUMANITY
I noticed this too especially from older generations but hey they are brainwashed to their old ways it’s best to lie and say sure one day and never do it 😂
I'm married with NO KIDS! I personally don't like children. It's not for me.
On another note, you have one of the prettiest smiles I’ve ever seen ( I’m a dental hygienist) I’m also married with 3 of the best kids ever! Truly blessed, but I get it 😆
Ahh! Thank you so much❤😂
Radiant smile worthy of praises ☮️
Crazy world.. As the oldest sibling of 4, I had to babysit my younger siblings a lot (My Dad died a day before my 8th birthday and it killed me inside, My Mom had to get a second job and I was forced to be the man of the house) when we were kids.. I suffered from anxiety and depression at a very young age (I was diagnosed at the age of 9, that's when I started having episodes)..
Left unchecked and untreated for years until I had a few episodes in school when I was 15. Got sent to the guidance counselor who noticed my behavior right away because she was a licensed Psychiatrist and Therapist. She told my mom to take me to get help, and if she (my mom) couldn't afford it, she would do as much free sessions as she possibly can.. My mom never took me because she could never seem to find the time, she was working 2 jobs.
I'm now 34 and I suffer from Bipolar disorder
I've had my mind made up from back then, I don't want any children!
Most oldest kids of single parents don't want no kids! It's a real thing since you already raised yourself and siblings so it's a no!
Your story sounds so similar to mine..No one ever noticed I was stressed and depressed though so you're lucky to have someone care and recognize the signs. I'm also a preschool teacher and yep, it's a NO for me. 😂 Live your Best life and give yourself all the love and care you poured into your siblings! Team Happiness 💪💯❤️
So about your ordeal.
When I’m out and a guy asks if I have kids I always answer with “Naw, none that I know of anyway.”
😂😂😭
That's a good one 😂
😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
Touché 😆
I know of a couple, married nearly 50 years financially stable and in good health.
Both are ONLY CHILDREN AND THEY DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS!
They're Retired, built 2 homes and travel the world 🌎🌏🌍
NO REGRETS WHATSOEVER! 😉🥳☺️🤗
That’s great but they are an anomaly. This is a word women do not know the meaning of mostly and I’m sure of it, cause they literally ALWAYS bring up like 0.00003% case or situation that doesn’t correlate to the norm
@@pleasedonttemptme5963 lol theyre not anomalies. Multiple Studies say childless unmarried folks are the happiest. There are NO studies or statistics that say having kids make people happier. Its just propaganda
@@pleasedonttemptme5963 my grandpa got SEVEN kids and hes in a nursing home getting visited once a year.
Lmao kids will not guarantee company when youre old. All those old folks in nursing home never getting visits .. they all got kids bruh 😂
People think getting married or being in a relationship and having kids equates to happiness and fulfillment. I know a lot of people in relationships with families who are not happy and miserable. 50 percent of marriages don't work out. Meanwhile some single people with no kids out here living they best life not stressing. Do what works for you not every way of living fits every person. We gotta learn to be ourselves and stop being pressured by society. F that...live yall own lives.
What's with this happiness and fulfillment shit ?
Amém
And a lot of these parents brainwash themselves into thinking it was worth it and try to drag you into having kids so you can be miserable too
That’s cause they don’t have God.. a relationship doesn’t consist of 2 people.. it consist of 3.. you, your spouse & God.. the TRUE & living God
@@lightbright5155 Ah yes the general 'god' so uh which of the 5,000 are you talking about? Cus at least a handful are ok with it.
Sis hearing your choice just makes me say HAVE FUN GIRL!! I’m jealous lmfao! Fuck what they saying girl kids are in extreme hassle. Living without is a life still able to be filled with spiritual value!!!
Appreciate you so much!✨✨😂
Wow.. I have yet to ever hear that response!! Girl you blew my mind
I could never be a mother cus I know damn well that children need to be treated with kindness, love, empathy, and affection….and I’d smack a brat so fast lmao and I never wanna do that to a kid so no thanks
😂😂😂😂 good point
And they'll try and tell you that you'll be different with your kids 😒 you're right, I'll be even worse with my children.
I ain't mad at you 💕 !!!! I'm the same way , don't get me wrong , I did a whole lot of babysitting in my day !! (66) yrs old now with no kids !!! And I'm okay with it !!! 😁😁😁😁😁😁👍
I’m glad someone gets it 😂
@@tthatonegirl2950 thank you 💕 ,
That's real tho! People always make having children a thing because they were coerced into it. The whole time they don't realize it's supposed to be optional, not mandatory.
I’m so happy you made this video I’m 27 and nearly 30 soon but really don’t want kids! I just be feeling there so much more to life and I can help people with feeling like I’m Tiedown
You only can buy purses and go on trips for so long..
Gratitude for recognizing that before you had a child.
@@ogprez4419 Spoken just like a MALE who doesn't have to be pregnant, doesn't have to give birth, and really doesn't have any responsibility for the day to day care of children. All you do is throw a couple of hundred dollars at the mother every month (and most of you have to be court ORDERED to do even that) then go back to running the streets to make even more kids you can't afford. Then you have the nerve to come into a childfree space to try and shame women, which tells me EXACTLY what kind of male you are. You can't stand the thought of single, childfree, and happy women. We all know why.
@@rarejewel9678 maybe that’s your dad.. that’s not most men😬
And there's nothing wrong with you not wanting kids. There's more than enoough women out there pushing out new people. And if it's not for you, it's not for you
One of my daughters got her tubes tied at 28 and the doc didn't want to do it and she said,my body,my choice, you're doing it,she doesn't want kids,she's a responsible human being
She's broken & damaged. You failed her and humanity.
I’m happy for her. And I have children. My last is 17.
Well I hope she’s not your only child because I couldn’t imagine not having grandchildren… What a loss to have children but not to be able to have grandchildren
Wow that's a bug step but as long as she was sure, I don't see the issue. Good for her.
@@E.P.7131 why would someone want to have children, and end up being a single mother? Especially to a BM like you. Explain
I feel you! I NEVER wanted kids….and I seem to attract men that want me to have kids for them. Nope!
Same, they hit you with a “I just want x and then I’m good” or “you’ll change your mind” or “you’ll be a great mom” pssh find someone who wants that and be happy with them 😂 have a nice life and leave me alone!
If everyone else you meet is the problem the problem is likely you
@@mimipastry yeah cool now stay outta that man's wallet don't ask that man to pay for you at dinner. You don't want kids that's fine but, that means you gotta be a man cause women bring absolutely nothing else to the table.
Stand your ground shawty. Its weird asf for anyone to only look for a partner purely to have children. Luckily my husband is indifferent to having kids like me
@@mimipastry he was probably just some incel who jumped to conclusions then felt embarrassed after blurting out the first nonsensical thing that came to mind lol I honestly pity men like that because they will never be able to make a real human connection with a woman or any other person for that matter cause they're always expecting there to be a catch. He's probably a fan of Andrew Tate and other aLpHa mAle dbags
I don't blame you on that. You have the right to reject parent life. That's the best thing I've ever chose
I have 3 kids and I can say the snitching drives me crazy. 😩🙄👊🏽
Then you failed as a mother
@@E.P.7131 who are you to be telling people they failed at something
@@HeresMyBit ignore the trolls. Don’t feed them.
Damn
Why you do dat
Good parenting teaches children accountability
Damn that's a real ass reason. Kids love me and I love them but I 100% choose my sanity, freedom and time over a crotch goblin 🤣🤣
You were once a crotch goblin 🤣🤣
Yes ma'am
Not a crotch goblin😆😆😆😆
😱
I'm childless and was a teacher. Just about every kid said, "You're not my friend anymore" 5minutes later they're playing with each other
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
This is the exact kind of woman I want in my life. Down to clown and spend all that money we make on vacation and road trips instead of snotty noses and dirty diapers
Ayeee!😂😂👏🏽
As a mother with ONE CHILD, I RESPECT YOUR DECISION.
There a difference between u and her if u do right by that child u don’t have to worry about being left in taken care of wen they get older they will do right by you I’m planning to retire my mom fully in the next 5 years so she can travel and do what she wants and she doesn’t want to be left in a home u better be grateful ur not like her a lot kids leave there parents in these old people homes and never visit
A kid got you fired. Thats crazy.
😂😂 kids boss parents around😅
😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😭😭
Kid is a baby goat. A child exposed her reckless abandon, and her actions got herself fired. Threatening a child with physical harm so that they stay quiet and complacent is damnable.
Happens more often than we think lol
Being around friends and families kids makes me not want them. Can't stand bratty kids.
They’re so annoying
Then work hard on your kids how difficult can that be some people work hard on y’all
Most of the time it's due to poor parenting and neglect, I've been around incredibly well mannered and sweet kids! Made me change my whole mind about them, how the parents choose to raise there kids has a really big impact on how they turn out
@@olorundareqowiyat1002 or…don’t have them. Then you don’t have to work so hard.
You can’t stand bratty kids I can’t stand them at all lmfaoo they all have the same traits that come with being a kid & I be absolutely repulsed like get tf away go find your mom you invisible to me fr😂💯
Funny story:
Grandmother always said I'd change my mind after getting older. Then, she saw my cooking skills. She said it was a good thing I'm not having kids.
she's accepting your decision, that's an improvement
I commend her for a child free lifestyle 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
they pressure women to have kids then she turns out to be a horrible mom then shame the women for being a horrible mother 🤷♀️
Exactly. Happened to me. I know I am a horrible mother because I did not want kids, but my husband and the church did. I want out of this nightmare.
@@rarejewel9678 you and your husband didn’t discuss children before marriage? Why would you do something you don’t want to do so permanent
@@HeresMyBit You don't get it. In my ex community and religion, marriage and children are NOT discussed. It is just done. Women are not looked at as humans with autonomy or rights. They are just vehicles for the men to use for their sexual satisfaction, domestic slaves, and breeders. Women do as they are told or suffer the consequences. It took everything in me to reprogram myself and escape from that nightmare. I can't send the kids back or they will be abused because of me leaving. Please understand that we all do not live the same lives. You are very fortunate that someone values you enough to care what you want out of life, that you have a choice. Some of us are not so lucky.
@@rarejewel9678 ahh okay I see the scope now. From how you described it Initially you were a horrible mother by choice. I commend you for being courageous enough to still stand by the children after escaping that. I hope you have or will consider some counseling to cope w all you’ve had to endure.
Having a child wasn’t on my path …
I have plenty of opportunities to be with children … I love them all but I am glad I can go home by myself.
Different strokes for different folks .
Live and let live
Sending love 💕
Well said! extremely powerful. Thank you!
I understand and i think that this is commendable realizing your not ready nor you may never be ready. My son is 25 so i have had a few years without having to say or stop eating all my food no sir i didn't cook, i was at peace not saying he disturb my Peace it's just coming home and not needing to say anything. I can come home decompress and watch tv before bed still not needing to say nothing. That is what you maybe feeling.
People have kids with people they have no intention to marry and nobody blinks an eye. When a person just chooses not to have children everybody looses their minds!
Great to listen to a straightforward and honest woman with a beautiful smile.
Hi Ronald my maiden name is Bradshaw... I wonder if we could be related
“I’m too gangsta, for the kidsssss” 😭😭
OG STATUS LOL
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I'm choosing not to have Kids either. I also worked w/ Kids in the Past. Besides the fact that I was told by Multiple Drs that I probably wouldn't be able to have Kids, the World TERRIFIES Me! I couldn't Imagine bringing another Life into it.
I'm 40yo & over the last 15-20yrs, things have gotten Progressively Worse & unfortunately, I don't see that changing. In some ways, things are Moving Backwards, instead of Forward, which is Concerning. I have Immense Respect for the Parents out there, due to all of the Unknowns!! 💙
I'm a Fur Mom & I'm Happy & Content w/ that. I have 3: 4 Legged Kids & 12 Homeless Kitties that I've been taking Care of for 4yrs now. I Worry enough about them, that I know if I had a Kid(s) of my Own, I'd be a FT Basket Case... No Thank You. Haha! My Life is Full as is.
I spent a decent chunk of my childhood helping my sisters with their kids, starting when I was 9. I'm all for being the cool aunt and having my freedom lol.
I'm with you on that one girl 😂
❤️❤️❤️
51 and child free. Thank you Lord 🥳
You thanking the wrong person because the Lord said to go out and multiply....thank the devil honey!
@@Krystal.Pascal7 so the devil was in Paul when he said it’s better to be single and childfree and give all your attention to god? Got it.
The devil can also use the truth to deceive you. Let that sink in!
I see you can’t cope with truth.
@@Krystal.Pascal7 damn so the devil was also in Jesus? Shit, good thing I don’t believe in any of them.
If you believe in the Lord the first Commandment he gave Adam was to be fruitful and multiply. Gee wonder why he said that. And that was even b4 the 10 commandments. Wow! Now we not even gone get social security... cause guess what... not enough babies being born to pay for us old folks. Even c hi.na begging women to have kids because they know they willl have no economy in the future. And Europe they literally pay women to have babies and send husband and wives on free se.xvacay. hope they come back with a baby. They dont like africans but since they dont have nobody to do the work and pay taxes to keep europe economy going. They only have lots of old people over there and no young people ... they have no choice. Imagine not having anyone to work in the nursing homes. Extreme Shortage of labor.
I thought I wanted kids until I was stuck living with my nieces and nephew. That changed my mind REAL quick! My youngest niece (currently a toddler) is the absolute worst and she's SUPER clingy and whiny whenever her mother is around. She has my sister annoyed most of the time lol. That child alone is the reason I got a vasectomy. Kid free for me!
I’m child free and I really enjoy my life. I also like seeing my friends that have children lean into their beautiful parenting experience. I can see that even though parenting is challenging, they are truly fulfilled. I am also fulfilled. It’s all good, either way.
im a guy who is 41 and i agree, i would never bring a child in this world. It's too much evil stuff going on out here.
Let’s just talk about how beautiful she and her smile are 🤗
I get asked this all the time.. then when I got married, they started tryna convince my husband that I Need To Have them. WE together realized it was for their own selfish reasons because somebody is elderly and she wants to see OUR creation before she dies. I had to explain hey, you was 40 when u had my husband let me get there first.
I worked at a daycare... Before the ink dried on my orientation papers, I quit 3 hours into my work day🤦🏽♀️😂
I'm 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I too never wanted kids. Neither does my husband 💪
Wow I'm looking for a husband who feels this way too 😏🤭😝
@@sheenalynn8664 my advice, stop looking! I was determined to be single then BAM! You'll find each other when the time is right 💚
That's awesome that you found each other. Sometimes it's hard to find a partner who's on the same page with you about not having kids. This world is in such a disgusting state. I would never subject a child to this bullshit.
@@brittanyedwards6530 preach!!!! 💚💚💚💚
Girl listen let me tell you some real shit. When I was growing up I always said I didn't want none. Somehow I just knew it was not the life for me. Got pregnant one day decided to keep it. Went deeper into it's not the life for me. Bitch I'm miserable. Honestly kids is just not for everyone. And that's okay it's your life. If I could turn back the hands of time that's all I going to say with love lol
I'm really confused now reading this. Like I know I shouldn't have kids but.... I'm thinking to have them because my boyfriend wants kids....but I can't picture myself pregnant and with kids. I just don't see ...it.
@@julianaohinya My current boyfriend wants kids. In the beginning I was thinking about having children for him. Even though it was against what I wanted. But you think to yourself "I love this man and I'm willing to do anything for him" right. Well one day we got into this really bad argument and break up. Eventually we got back together and we're really happy but it's not the same anymore. He asked me now about children and it's a hands down no for me. I'm not interested and after something like that not even 2% anymore. Children are a lifelong commitment. It will not just be for him it will also be something that you will have to put your all into. It's a very big decision to make. Just don't make it for someone else. Do what feels right for you!!!!
@@symphonysimmons1313 oh wow. I really have to rethink everything. Thank you,. It's really hit me....
@@symphonysimmons1313 Your story is similar to mines. Now the child is here, and there's no going back, so I'm doing the best job I can. I tell childless women all the time.... don't do it, and don't let society to pressure you or making you believe that it's the best thing since slice bread.
@@julianaohinya don’t do it, if it’s not you want or what God is calling you to do. The child will suffer one way or another.
I so encourage women to truly, very honestly ask themselves, and ONLY themselves, if they really want to do this. Shit can get really hard, like, you never thought it could become. Let’s keep things real here. Think the worst, at least you’ll be prepared. Are you up for that? Are you ready to sacrifice everything you have and everything you are for someone else’s (ur kid’s) good if shit gets real? Reality is, Women nowadays don’t have the protection or safety nets EVERY older generations had. No mother would’ve been left to survive in her car or a ducking tent in the street with her kids in the 50’s or 70’s. Someone would’ve done something. Most women had men around (brother, father, uncles, cousins..) to support and defend her, and we’ve lost a lot of that loyalty with time. Your father or brother probably won’t do anything if your husband abuses you. The woman is left alone to fight back and be respected, against someone that’s convinced he’s better than you, more powerful than you, and controls you. The Respect and Dignity in those years ain’t no more!!! If you willing to do it, it’s VERY IMPORTANT to Keep your financial independence, get prenups if necessary, have money ready if at any moment things turn to shit, stay close to your family or close friends(chosen family of natural family toxic, which is a huge risk factor for shit happening in your life, AGAIN!), because otherwise, you’d be very, very vulnerable, to vulnerable, and that’s how society keeps taking advantage of women, how women end up in abusive toxic relationships. Please, Don’t fool yourself thinking “I’m married, everything he is, I am”. That’s BS. And the MAN that truly loves you, that is good to you, will understand that and will want to protect you from this potential vulnerable position.
Be better than me ladies.
It’s not selfish it’s selfless.I chose the same
I've never understood that argument. If anything, it's selfish to have kids because they didn't choose to be born.
Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure the argument was invented as a way for people to make others feel miserable as well. "I'm miserable, so it's selfish that you choose not to be!" holds the same weight.
As a mother I’m one and done.. lived And learned. I’m good.
I hear you! 😄😄😄 I am childless and proud of it! 😁😁😁
Yasss❤️
Majority of black men want black women to do all the work anyway and create all these single mothers, its better to not have kids so you don't have to deal with bm shenanigans when they take off their mask after kids
Speak on it😈
It genuinely fascinates me when I tell someone after they ask that I don't want kids how they have three audacity to react as though that's a bad thing or some kind of abnormality. 😅
We 8 billion people we good 👍🏾
And many of them have been abused have mental health issues cannot take care of themselves properly are not happy and are not living their best life
Right. Let's care for the children who are already here.
If I had a dollar for everytime I was asked do have kids.
Me: No thank you.