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Mr. Cooper like the book. I know I'm not a paid member, but I've got a question about a popular situation in the media that also coralates with a chapter in your book.... The Christlys. I guess the two main people are getting sent to jail for fraud. Same crime different length of sentencing. Guess who gets the lesser?? Lol.
Great advice- What type of man drives a 2 pedal car? Great advice, but driving a girl car with 2 pedals detracts from your message. Happy Holidays! GEG
15 years ago I was almost engaged to a girl who demanded a ring worth at least $65,000. When I protested she pointed out that I drove a $100,000 Porsche. Believe it or not I sort agreed with her logic. These girls are good at gaslighting us. Good news- I didn’t buy the ring and escaped a potentially miserable marriage. Close call.
a porsche is a great vehicle. its worth the money. a diamond ring is not: its perceived value arises from the fact that a bunch of ppl kanye doesnt like hoarded the most abundant material in the world and then marketed the shit out of it as a symbol of the vague promise of regular sex
Sheesh, glad you managed to pull your head out of your ass. My wife’s engagement ring cost me $2500…it sits in the “ring holder” everyday because her fingers got swollen from being pregnant with our twins. She wears another ring that is more comfortable for her. The point is to say that the ring doesn’t matter. I hope every guy here finds someone who genuinely cares for them.
My wife chose the ring she got, and it was the least expensive she could find. As the years went by, she never ever thought about upgrading our rings even if we could afford it. We made it to 31 years before she passed away.
They are looking how men react when they order the most expensive meal in a restaurant, the great test on our side is to bring her at a jeweler to see how expensive the ring she choose is.
This is SO spot on. 🎯 I proposed to my wife with an engagement ring that cost $99. She was overjoyed. In less than 2 months, we'll be married 25 years. Funny thing: other women are envious of _her,_ not because of a big rock or lack thereof on her finger, but because she's [still] happy to be with me, our boys are grown [not moved out yet, they've just started building themselves/on their grind], our homes are nearly paid off and she doesn't need to work for an income.
@@kaelen9906 Sorry to hear that bro. Your girl wasn't committed. Consider it a blessing she left while you were still able and can move on with life. The ones that do grey divorces [retirement years] are the worst. I've been sick several times in our 30 years total together. The first time was when we were engaged. I was almost bedridden by something or other, could barely get to the bathroom and back, for about 3 weeks. Also unemployed at the time, having recently left a bad gig income-wise. She was working 3 jobs. She could - and perhaps should - have left me then, and her parents were available to easily take her in if she wanted to, but she didn't. That's when I knew she was dependable.
I love how freely he answered to : "Well, what if she says 'no' ?" - "Then you don't go out with her" . We as men tend to overthink stuff when a woman is in our head and don't realize we have a lot more power than we think.
@@InvestgoldUK Like that one. Picnics are very underrated date ideas. Once you're together bring some wine/alcohol, some music and blanket and it's a great date especially if you live in a city where you can stop off elsewhere on the way back etc. Any girl who doesn't like that does not like you, period. The women who liked me the most and I had the best relationships with I probably spent $0-40 per average hangout usually
My brother fell into this trap. The wedding HAD to be on the beach. Meanwhile, no accommodations for a parent with cancer 3 hours away. He chose her side, that's a weak frame.
I dated a great woman, but she insisted on a 2 carat ring. We were in our 20s, so that was laughably impossible. Probably 6-12 months salary, on jewelry! That was the start of the end for me. Thankfully I walked away.
A good buddy of mine married in his 30s. His GF insisted on a min 1ct diamond engagement ring. This was in the 90s. Soon after the wedding, he dropped by my place, it was unexpected, and he was not happy. Apparently he had a 'spirited' debate with his new wife. He expressed serious doubts about her - one remark I remember very clearly was 'if this marriage survives...' They are still together after many decades. Roughly 5-7 yrs ago, my wife and I went to his house, Wifey and I sat together on the couch. Across from us, he sat on the couch, his wife chose to sit on the carpet at his feet. This tells me he successfully tamed her. FYI he has an electrical engineering degree. He is self employed. She is a dermatologist. Both high earning people.
@@honor9lite1337 All I am willing to say is that I have clear & reasonable boundaries. And I have the strength & will to enforce them. At one time my wife deliberately disrespected me. This was not something to be discussed. I merely checked the internet to find a new place to live. When wifey asked me what I was doing, I calmly told her without anger or bitterness. I said I would stop if she gave me a sincere apology and a reasonable assurance it would be the last time. She was not happy that I called her out. She was less happy at being held to account. But she did it, and I chose to stay. FYI her life with is FAR better with me in it. Therefore if she wants to stay, she must be a better wife than any woman who might replace her. This is how to achieve job security. I have told her more than once, I am willing to forgive mistakes and the occasional bad day- because everyone gets them. But I am not willing to forgive disrespect. I am very willing to walk even though we have been together for decades.
My girl was happy with a $10 ring from Claire's that came AFTER I simply asked her to marry me and a courthouse wedding. Still happy together after 11 years.
@@TechnoMageB5 Turns out there's always a cheaper choice somewhere 😆 I did eventually get her something nicer once I had the means to...but it didn't stand as a requirement to having a relationship so she passed that test
@@TechnoMageB5 I've given my girl cheaper rings. Ones I made from 25 cent stainless steel nuts. Now I did put an insane amount of work into them to the point where they could be sold in boutique shops, but hey, material wise they were cheap lol
Great video. Through the lens of a divorce lawyer: there is a whole area of law devoted to engagement ring litigation. An engagement ring is a “conditional gift”. Meaning the engagement ring becomes the sole property of the recipient as soon as the wedding takes place. That means in the event of divorce, the value of the engagement ring does is NOT subject to equitable distribution, whereas other gifts given by each spouse to the other spouse are subject to equitable distribution. Engagement rings are the exception in most jurisdictions. Wife keeps the engagement ring at divorce. What happens if you buy an engagement ring, and give it to your dearly beloved and someone calls off the wedding? Who gets the ring? The answer is: it depends on the jurisdiction. In some jurisdictions, the courts do not care who calls off the wedding. If no wedding, the ring goes back to the person who gave the ring. In other jurisdictions, the courts examine who called off the wedding and why. There was a recent case where a woman filed for divorce after about 15 years of marriage. Husband gave her a huge engagement ring 15 years earlier when he asked her to marry him. At divorce, she had the ring appraised and discovered that the ring was made of cubic zirconia. She sued him to try to get the value of the ring as if it were really a diamond. She lost. The court reasoned that she had 15 years to get it appraised, and it only seemed to matter to her in divorce. Run, (don’t walk) away from anyone who demands a certain size engagement ring. It is just a foreshadowing of things to come.
I've seen you in the comment sections of many of the guys in the manosphere. Just wanted to say your advice is always appreciated and you're a blessing. Thanks for caring for your fellow man, bud.
Exactly! I was dating a woman for about 3 months, and she attempted to plant seeds in my head about marriage. I played along and knew she was ear-hustling my phone conversation with a salesman concerning a used motorcycle! She then suggested we look at Promise Rings. She was happy with the tiny stones and immediately took me to the engagement ring section! I made the comment I wasn't comfortable spending over 20g on a "Promise Ring"! She said, "but you are willing to spend that on a USED bike?" I simply said, "i can see myself enjoying that bike years down the road!" She said she needed a "grand gesture" from a potential husband(she was married prior). I chose the bike!
@@bertf.291 Grand Gesture? That is totally funny. My response to her would be "be sure and let me know how that Grand Gesture thing works out for you". I'm assuming you go rid of her.
As a 25 year old, I do financially well and have been dating a lot lately. You make a good point on not wanting to drive your “hotrod” on the first date, I use to take my corvette all the time. Also the hike idea is great, every time I take a pretty lady out for drinks or casual food they order the most expensive shit, yeah I can afford it but who the hell does that on a first date? Strolls In the park is the move now, thanks Rich.
You can afford it, but if you keep wasting money on women, you won't be able to afford it. Stop spending money on women, the more you do, the less money you have - the less you have, the less valuable you are to them. Just increase your own value, SPEND nothing on them - the virtuous girl will be the only one to value that discipline & even if that doesn't exist - among the trash, 3 out of 10 will still stay to leech off you somehow while giving you their P. What more do you want ? - 3 out of 10 trash girls is a good deal. Getting the virtuous girl is the best deal. No money spent, only earned.
@@cv6176 Strike a random conversation after an eye contact. Sometimes (doesn't always work) when in a restaurant or somewhere - if a lone girl or even a girl in a girl group (this could be sabotaged by the other girls if you don't give them their share of attention), makes eye contact. I calmly walk to her after some time & ask if she knows me from somewhere & I apologize for not recognizing her if she did & tell her it was not my intention to forget her & hurt her feelings. Usually it can go anywhere from there.
Absolutely CORRECT! Coffee Dates should be the ENTRY point to filter her out IF she even qualifies for a relationship with a man or even you. Remember, this is NO LONGER the era where women are deemed, quality women. So, take that fantasy out of your head and embrace REALITY.
These are great because you can see how they order (get something simple or most expensive), what are they most focused on in the 1st couple of questions, how they treat others (if wait staff is involved), and if they respect your time (being on time, how are they dressed, and how flexible with meeting time). Had many great and terrible dates this way but you can get a quick general feel of someone thru this.
My ltr going well and she's a ten/ten... No ring required... Won her due to frame control and other guidance from my guy Rich Cooper... Forever grateful for unplugging me
@@MrFrank107 yeah she buggin me but mostly for me to wear one lol... i like to keep competition anxiety in play. we had islamic marriage which is the dream as not recognised by the state but means she's fully committed, as am i tbh. technically the ring thing is a western thing
@@nabilislam1848 I'm just saying this from 11 years of experience being married -- as long as you stay attractive, you don't really need to do much to actually keep that competition anxiety in play. It's honestly easier to just be passively generating it than actively generating it
@naaK010 Are you Muslim? If so it shouldnt even be in question, stop delaying!! and you can simply tell her/ let her know (by utilising frame control) that she wont be getting a state marriage as its non sharia so un-necessary for you to fulfil your duties as a husband. If she kicks off just let her know as a high value male you wont have a problem finding another woman willing to accept your terms. Furthermore, as a Muslim the duties as a husband means providing for her entirely, no need for shared account as I pay for everything and pay her some spending money each month (eg sent to her account)... I wouldnt have an issue with shared account and essentially paying for everything (bills mortgage etc) from that, along with giving her a budget for spending money (benefit here is she's at least aware of what you're covering each month) but I would fund this acc with monthly transfer and keep main assets/ earnings separate. If you're not a Muslim, thats the first step and we can have a separate convo about that.
@naaK010 I know I am making this sound easy but I am speaking from experience, the first time round I failed as I wasnt aware of red pill/ Rich Cooper etc and your quintessential 'nice guy' husband that essentially lost her attraction and got asset stripped when she later changed her mind and wanted out (of the state marriage). Never again and never did i think frame control would work so well. New lady knew the score from day 1...want a state wedding: go elsewhere/not interested! Want a husband who is putting a dent in the universe, going places, will provide and care for you, will keep you in your place as a compliant wife?: lets go
It cannot be stressed enough. It's not about convincing a girl to "be into you" over the course of a few dates. It's about finding a woman who "is into you" and then seeing if the chemistry and circumstances are right. A convinced woman will continually need to be convinced whereas burning desire has to be put out. Which camp do you want to be in?
My husband asked his mom for his grandma's ring. I couldn't be happier. The history and love and family it represents is amazing. I hope we keep passing it down through the generations. And as for dates, I always insisted on paying for myself the first few dates because I wanted him to know I was there for him. When it got serious I let him pay because he knew I was there for him and I didn't want to emasculate him or be too pushy. It was my way of opening up and taking it to the next level (baby steps!), like the difference between holding hands and finally allowing kissing. I wish dating like that was more normalized. People need to take it slow, respect each other, and make sure they have similar values and goals before rushing headlong into a serious relationship. People need to learn patience and their worth.
I wish more women learned patience and DISCIPLINE because of the amount of men they normally date. Dating today means having sex and no good comes from anybody hopping in bed with as many people as possible. It should be attempted to save for your serious partner. Not a quick fling or friend just because they are hot
You would have never seen that ring from me. I would have bought one unique for you but a family heirloom stays with the bloodline. That ring would have gone to your daughter if you had one. If you didn't, it goes to the first daughter of one your husband's siblings. My mother-in-law had lots of jewelry, considering she was a jeweler, and when she passed away it all went to her daughters, granddaughter and great granddaughters, even at my own insistance. None to the boys, those half-wits would probably hock it. You didn't say how long you've been married. My wife and I have been for 48 years since the age of 19.
lol "princess diamond" is just a style of cut for the stone. It just means it's square instead of round. It has nothing to do with the size or cost. being hung up on that is autistic af dude. You sure you didn't drive her away?
@@caseypayne5138 No she was very specific...so much so she want to pick it out...so seat down somewhere son...I'm only saying I get what Rich is saying and he's 100% right
@@agentrocklee so she had a design idea she liked? Why is that bad? Sorry guy, you're losing me here. I agree that some sort of unreasonable demand should be a huge red flag but, like...if she's good to you, she makes you happy, and she loves you -- and you have the means to do it -- what's wrong with also getting her what she wants sometimes? I may have given my wife a cheapo ring from Claire's AFTER just proposing to her in a simple direct way but once I had the means to I got her a real ring. She got to have a say in what it looked like. And I did it because I wanted her to have it, not because she nagged me over it.
@@caseypayne5138 there's nothing wrong with splurging for your woman, I think the question really is... Were you her first choice?... Does she have genuine desire for you?...If I was the guy she initially chose would she have such demands? I've been on both ends of the spectrum... Women I run into now... After taking the red pill and transforming myself, there is no demands, there's no conditions, I can get away with feeding them cookout and they are so happy to be there with me...if they really share that desire for you none of that crap matters
@@agentrocklee "First" choice? What does that mean exactly? I can confidently say that I am her BEST choice and that she still has genuine desire for me. Back then she didn't have any demands, she just wanted to be with me and it didn't matter how. I found myself in the same situation as you do now. So I didn't have a problem with getting married, it was what I wanted and I don't regret it for a second. I agree with you, man. Demands and conditions are a pretty huge red flag. If something ever happened with my current relationship and I was moving back into the dating world, I'd treat it the same way as you do.
When my wife and I first got together we were both living paycheck to paycheck. We were young and not established yet. I bought her the ring I could afford which wasn't much but she picked it out based on the budget I had. I think it was around $1500. 10 years later for our anniversary we traded that ring in for something much nicer. That was her reward for sticking with me. We are still together 28 years later.
@Son-of-Krypton Legitimate questions: Where are you going to get accurate body count data? And how will you know she's loyal without taking a chance on dating her? On the loyalty part, are you going to play the shit test game with her to test her loyalty? How do you plan to vett her on that part?
@@gunsandcommissions lm convienced anyone dating in western society should just accept body count to be insane on most women considering the apps giving them unlimited access to sleep around with anyone anytime.
Agree 100%. First date is not really a date, it's a meeting. Coffee in the morning or a drink in the evening. If you're hitting it off and you want to go another round of drinks, so be it. If not, you excuse yourself and don't waste anymore of each other's time. I've had drinks that led to dinner the same night because were getting along (and she shared the cost) but I never invite them for dinner at the outset.
You've nailed it , You lay down the terms of the we're and the when, , other wise , if She's starts from the beginning , laying down the rules , that's wood be a RED FLAG.....
I got married this past 7th of October. I still don't have a ring! I told my husband it is not a priority right now and to wait. We didn't have a big budget for a ring and i realized its not a priority. We skipped the ring part of the ceremony but we didn't care. I love him so much. I can always get a ring, who cares!
Her: “I won’t marry you without an 8c engagement ring” My answer: “Awesome. Have a good life” I dated a woman once, got into a relationship with her, and then she’d bring up marriage. And she always said I got the “deer in the headlights of a Mack truck” look when She mentioned marriage. I knew it wasn’t that she wanted to marry me, she just wanted to get married. And she did. To the next poor sap that came along. And I saw her on FB a while back. Dear god did I dodge a bullet.
When my husband and I were dating he asked me what type of ring I wanted and if I would be ok with another type of gem instead of a diamond. I told him wouldn’t care what he got me. He ended up buying a ruby ring that costed less then 1k on Amazon, and I love it. We’ll be married for 5 years this coming January🥰 What he’s saying is so true. When a women truly loves her man she won’t care what type of ring he gives her, or about having a big extravagant wedding. She more then likely won’t even care if it was just the two of you getting married at a courthouse or a church and she’s wearing cute little dress instead of a big wedding dress. Same goes with dating, she won’t care where you go and what you do. She’s just happy to get to know you and spend time with you. At the end of the day all she wants is to marry the love of her life, have babies with him, and grow old together.
Now, if you could just TEACH THE CLASS. 🤣 Everything you said is spot-on. These online presentations make it sound as though ALL WOMEN are jerks, which simply isn't true. We guys DO need to be cautious, but hyper-vigilance is the ticket to unhappiness. Thanks!
My husband didn't have any car at our first date. We were scheduled to meet for coffee/lunch. But he called me saying that he was coming to walk me to the coffee shop. That was a great demonstration of care and affection. He holded my hand down the street and we went by bus. Also, he set the tone for our relationship. Men out there, wake up early, organize yourselves, be confident and truthful to your words. So, you will find a lady that values you. Man and woman have different rules in life/family. Men are the gates to protect the house and the family. The women are the pillar to keep the roof/family in place.
My wife insisted her wedding ring be made from aquamarine rather than diamond. That was her only stipulation, "diamond requires no imagination" was her reason. I bought her the nicest aquamarine engagement ring I could find and followed it up a year later with a nice aquamarine bracelet. She is a very happy wife.
Great post! This is 100% down to earth reality. Take a woman out for coffee and if you vibe with her go for a walk or bite to eat. Don’t waste time on a woman who doesn’t show interest in you. She is not the prize, you are.
The first dates very often set the tone of the relationship. Always set the tone that you want, and those who don't like it will not end up in a relationship with you.
Spot on. Told my girl I was getting her a ring pop for engagement ring. Obviously joking but also subliminally not a joke. I had already heard her talk about showing it off to other girls and the ring so-and-so got and I nipped that in the bud immediately - explained to her that if the ring is about her flexing on other girls she can find another guy to marry. She changed her behavior almost instantly.
Very occasionally I introduce my wife as "my first wife." It is the truth. Also a subliminal message. We are married since the mid 90s. Together for 5 more yrs.
My husband got me a ring from the vintage section of the jewelry store and negotiated it down an impressive amount (you could either have these potentially continue to collect dust or I could pay you out in cash right now for a little less than the price tag😉). He knew I didn't want it to be thousands of dollars because I like to stretch my dollar. It would hurt to know if that much money would go into a ring instead of savings, travel or something more important.
That was my ring also! Both of us vtg rings. Actually did the wedding ring backwards and custom made from travel memories. So engagement band and wedding ring with a stone haha. I didn't know any better I didn't have any practice and didnt plan on a do-over either
I agree, I've been approachedby women who wanted to join me on gym, run and swim-sessions. The point is that if they're interested enough (have the desire for you) they will be satisfied just by being in your company.
I've been following your "20 dollars max for the first date" rule and its been working great and has saved me a lot of money as a young guy. Thanks for the additional wisdom Rich, big fan of your work.
I took my wife for a first date for a quick walk then to a 6 dollar tempura spot. It was greasy as hell and I brought my friend along. She was shocked. But the way she looked in my eyes was real. I could feel it. Instead of sitting opposite of each other we were sitting next to each other. The dynamic was fun. I felt she really really liked me. I then made up for the cheap food by taking her up the five star hotel suite I was staying, ordered some champagne and chocolate cake. She had no idea about my status. She looked up to me and asked: "Are you a King or something?" Talking about underpromise and overdeliver. Now 6 years in 2 kids. And the engagement ring? 500 dollar one I got in Antwerp. We sold it for travel. No marriage ring neither. We don't do scams anymore and definitely not the diamond one.
Keele Street & 17th sideroad. Hey, that's just West of 'Snowball'. That rolling country road is beautiful in the summer, but in the winter it is often icy and treacherous. Best to use it only if you have really 'soft' winter tires on your vehicle (I know from experience). King Township really does not do a good job salting the roads there in the winter months. Your advice is 'spot on', but even when you do find a 'good' girl, she will change as time goes on, and usually not for the better.
as a female i can say this is ACCURATE! if we TRULY love a man material things wont matter. if she NEEDS something MATERIAL to be with you thats because she doesnt really care about you.
My wife and I have been together since university (2015) she's only ever been with me, after university we bought our rings together. They were on clearance and we got the engagement and wedding bands for less than $800. Instead of a fancy wedding we eloped and we used that money to buy our first vehicle (used) in cash for $14k. She's an amazing cook and baker, she's a stay at home mom, she homeschools our children, and she's the wind in my sails. We have 3 children (more on the way). I'm 32 and she's 29. I make over $100k with my full-time job and i have a side business as well. I wouldn't be where I was if she hadn't been my cheerleader and took care of me all this way (emotionally and physically). Her and I hate that we're the exception. We're super happy and our friends aren't 😞. My wife listens a lot to the Suzanne Venker show on female nature and it's been an even better result in our communication between us. I'm super blessed and I wish others were too.
It's love that matters. It's what keeps life worth living. Too many get caught up in the symbols of love (ie. ring, house, car) while completely denying the source of those symbols. It's like going to a restaurant and wanting the sign outside and not the restaurant itself or the yummy food they serve. Unbelievable!
I dont know how I stumbled on your video but I couldn't agree more. My husband and I met in the military before covid but really started "dating" at the hight of it all. We got confined to base where we couldnt leave the base for 9 months straight, so we couldn't go on a dinner date, we walked the base together, listened to the foxes laughing at dusk from a little grove of pine trees, shared our boxed lunches together. Watched helicopters doing testflights from a hilltop. At the end of all that we got posted apart and got engaged when I came home for Christmas 6 months later. He proposed with a ring passed down from his mother, I honestly couldn't tell you it's value because It's not something I've ever needed to think about. My husband once said, and I happen to agree that an engagement ring should be made of brass so that if you want it to look beautiful you must polish it and give it attention each day. In the spirt of that every day I would take some isopropyl alcohol and shine the gold and dimonds up. It was my little tradition while I spent 8 more months away from him. Our wedding (still during covid nonsense) was in the backyard, I wore my white 1950s prom dress, he wore a fair isle sweater I knitted him, it cost the price of the marriage certificate and officiant. I wouldnt have it any other way because I love him and money doesn't buy love. I've seen so many friends of mine cowtow to a woman, if you do it once it will never stop, she'll want the wine and dine date, she'll want the expensive ring, the perfect wedding, the perfect house, money for clothes, to be endlessly pampered during her pregnancy, she'll never work to get back in shape, the birth will have to go her way, the kids will go to a private school so on and so forth until last but not least she'll want the kids and half your paycheck. Protect yourself from these vultures lads they are insufferable.
First date walking, totally agree. You learn so much about her attitudes, traits, and even values from just taking a 20 minutes stroll around the pond, park or whatever. Get her out into nature and see how she acts and reacts to stimuli.
my wife didn't even care that I bought no engagement ring :-) I would never play this bs game if she has one single rule on you, leave her be. Get better, improve and return to dating after having progress. repeat.
People reveal themselves in the details of every interaction with another humanbeing. If anything she does sets off an internal alarm, don't gloss over it. Take a closer look. You do great work, Rich.
I bought my wife's engagement ring; it was one someone else had put on a payment layaway plan and couldn't pay it off. I paid off the balance, which was about $200, we have been married 28 years and she is the glue that has held our marriage together through some very difficult times.
The fact that guys have to told this is kinda sad. A girl saying, "you have to buy me an 8 carat ring" and the guy actually sticking around, let alone actually buying it for her, just speaks to a whole other dimension of scarcity.
Even more sad is when a guy worth 8 figures (allegedly) can still be fooled by this type of behaviour lol. They say money makes you alpha, but I guess not always.
Have to wonder what’s more pathetic, the fact that she’s made those demands or the fact that the dude has not only considered said demands but is actually looking to fulfill those demands! The beta thirst runs too deep in that one!
I kept it simple (in terms of money) with my girl. Long story short we met when I was working overseas and I told her she can either come with me back to the US or we are through since I don’t do long distance. Fast forward a bit, I put her through the grinder and she accompanied with me to see my family in Colombia and we went through long treks in the jungle as well as touring some of the not so nice areas of the country. Fast forward more we are living in a 1000 sqft apartment with my dad all while I’m trying to build my business and she’s helping me along the way. Not only that but my proposal was done my own way, with me proposing to her in a little Cessna while flying over the city and telling her to read the in flight manual as I told her that the plane was experiencing engine trouble. The ring was an emerald, it was relatively simple, and it didn’t cost much. Our wedding was small and our wedding dinner was at a BBQ place. Not only that but I made her sign a postnuptial agreement. Not once has she complained that I should give her what she deserves.
About a year ago I went on a date with a woman who had been cheated on by her ex. We met on a dating app, but before our date, she found my profile on a different dating app where I had used a different name (because woman google my real name all the time) so she questioned me about that. Then she changed the time of our date and I agreed to meet her at an earlier time, but I made the mistake of not making her decide the venue or activity. One thing I learned from Rich is that you always make the girl plan the date if she changes the previous arrangement. Anyways, it was probably the worst date in my life. She was super paranoid and her voice sounded like a witch. Her body was nice which is why I wanted to meet her, but her attitude was terrible. I honestly wanted to run away within 30 seconds of meeting her.
@@stuartkarlson307 Yes, she said she wanted to meet a friend at an earlier time. I told her "Its fine, but if you're going to go on a date with some other dude, then I don't want to change the time for that" She said she understood, but never said if the friend was a guy or girl. Anyways, she kept questioning me because I said I had to meet a guy later that day to buy a snowboard off him from Craigslist (which was true). She didn't believe me.
@@23ofSeptember, it was already time to cut her off and move on. I just tell them, "Well, it sounds like this plan won't work, so we can just play it by ear and set up another time, or whatever." Then, I get off the phone. They NEVER HEAR FROM ME AGAIN.
You are right on point with everything you have said. One point of interest; make sure that the woman didn’t just get out of another relationship. Make sure there is a reasonable amount of time before she dates again. You will end up being just a filler for her for the time being. Also, if you have any type of wealth, make sure you have a prenuptial in place and if she’s not willing to sign off on it, then she’s not for you and that will answer all of your questions about her.
Met my wife of 33 years in college. Our first date was in the library then out for coffee. We were poor college students so going out for pizza was a big date. Good advice to keep it low key at first. You will both know if there is something to keep it going or not and it makes it easy for either to bow out respectfully and drama free.
Great points. I always start small and give more as the relationship progresses, that way you know if she wants you and is with you for the right reasons. Also if you are a high value man, you don't want to commit to a dinner for 2-3 hours. Short, a coffee for 30-45 min and you can decide after that if you want to take her out once again on a dinner. Don't over commit from the beginning to giving so much!
The first diamond ring was really carved out of the ring itself. They were so tiny. Yet she loved me and stayed with me. Now she wears a ring handed down from her family.
David DeAngelo said that if a women ever dictated to him where he was going to take her on a date, he would respond in a normal voice, "Sure. When are you going to pick me up?"
I'm a huge advocate for coffee on the first date. I asked a girl if she wanted to get to know each other over a cup of coffee and she was down. I ran 10- 15 minutes late but I told her to grab a table. She did. When I got there, she got a table and her own cup of coffee. I walked in, greeted her, and sat down. We talked for a couple of hours and the date went good enough to where she texted me later and wanted to go out again. And the highlight of that date was the fact that I didn't pay a fuckin dime.
@Peggy Gilespie it's not that I don't want to pay for a date; it's a matter of principle. I've been on plenty of dates where I've payed upwards to $200 and the date/ relationship doesn't work out from the start. As a guy, going on a date and money isn't involved is equivalent to a girl going on a date and sex isn't involved. In other words, they like you for you. In regards to the settle insult you added about me being broke; I'm not rich by any means. But I don't have any debt of any kind and I religiously save money. I have nothing to prove but I'm not going to let someone insult the hard work and sacrifices I've made to get to where I am now. And this goes back to not wanting to be taken advantage of financially by a woman.
You'll crap all over her in no time and dump her for some sloot that demands stuff. Don't deny it either because that will confirm that you have no self awareness.
I am 50 and have had more than a few women in my life. Not once did I take them on an "official" date. Why do men date at all? I live in Scandinavia and we don't have a dating culture here like in North America. I have nothing against dating, but if you want to meet, attract and keep beautiful women it's definitely not necessary to date.
I notice women are often intimidated by dinner dates. In my limited experience, they'd be more open to an off-the-cuff daytime coffee run, or casual meet at the local dive. Also, Joker from Better Bachelor used to work in a jewelry shop. He thought it was odd that women with their fiance's would come in and ask for either a different ring or for a ring he picked out to be modified in some way. These men went out of their way, reading up on stuff like birthstones and things men don't normally know, and tried to suss out a ring that would represent their love for their fiance'es, but to the women it wasn't good enough.
Wow, that was me 20+ years ago. My fiancée and HER MOTHER went ring shopping with me. I was young and stupid. She didn't bat an eyelid when I told her the ring was going to cost my entire life savings. Fast forward to now, I'm sleeping on the futon in the spare bedroom, and we're divorcing if we can't work things out. Men, don't dismiss the red flags. Scarcity mindset is a killer. Your value will continue to increase over time, so don't be afraid to end a relationship before marriage if there are red flags.
All true! Even the ones who show good faith are after one thing and that's financial security with your money not theirs. Be careful and keep your worth.
Gents ( quick story), I bought the girl the ring she wanted (was like 1300 ) after a discussion about the promise that a ring signifies, not the cost only to have “you only spent 1300 on my ring bla bla bla” post relationship.... I wouldn’t spend even half of that now if I did get married... the fact that I had to explain to her I wasn’t spending 10g on something that sits on her finger that she could potentially loose as a qualifier to marry her should of rang some bells in my head!! Don’t be a Jarrod, walk away boys!!
Rich, I agree that is probably a really good way to weed out the women who care about expensive things over the guy. I would also add for the long-term relationship aspect that if she stands by you through hard times, specifically with money or work, she has got to be a keeper. If she supports you and tries to build you up when you’re struggling, there is a woman who genuinely cares for you.
First time watching this channel, great video and spot on. I either take a girl out for drinks or even just a walk in a scenic area. The walk is my usual go to. If a girl is cool enough to just spend time with me and not have me buy anything for her, it’s a good sign.
Cannot agree more, well summarised. Learnt all this myself and was brave enough to pull the plug just in time before any (financial) commitment.I find the “how to become an elegant lady” thing absolut hilarious, just remember this quote: “You can take the girl out from the village, but you cannot take the village out of the girl!”
Bro, if you live in a cold country- mine is cold enough (-40 C at winter), it is considered a common courtesy to invite a girl on a date to any indoor facility. And it always comes with a price, so it is only natural to meet in a nice cozy cafe or in a coffee place. I only pay for the meal if I enjoy a company, if a person acts entitled - screw her. Also I choose places I enjoy, not otherwise. On a second date I take a girl to play Russian pyramid. Because I like playing it and having a conversation. Also it is a hard game to play and it shows all the flows in character within 1 hour.
A good woman would want you to be intentional with her time and yours. I guess some have time for simple coffee dates but it's not creative or romantic IF you're looking to be inspired about love. I rather have a man take the first date to showcase about his hobbies/ interests. Great first or low cost date options depending on your interests: art galleries, college exhibits, Lime bike share rides, wine walks, food exhibits like touring a chocolate factory, for ladies like me who enjoy cars, I have a vette - going to car shows/ looking at rims, free movie/comedy shows if you sign up for the email list, charcuterie picnic, neighborhood farmers market, Cold stone creamery, blue berry picking at a farm, playing pool tables, taking a ferry ride. Plenty of ideas!
Fascinating and important topic! The gold diggers ⛏ Though I’m more interested in stealth gold diggers and have made it part of my skill set to spot them..ever since I heard two of them when I was a teenager and helping out at my neighbor’s party (they were 7 figure wealthy people). Two divorced women there were blabbing, no doubt helped by the martinis 🍸 they were drinking, about how they played their husband for fools because they only pretended to love them, be good housewives etc. But they had an exit strategy of no more than 10 years. The one said she couldn’t last for more than 5 years..and the other said she needed to wait until 10yrs due to a prenup. Eavesdropping, I absorbed this conversation thinking down the road this is extremely important intel to know. I haven’t heard hardly anyone talk about the stealth gold diggers, but I help friends and acquaintances with this. Some have been ‘victims’ of this level of gold digging. But unfortunately it rarely gets talked about and hardly anyone knows what to look out for! I’m curious if anyone else has had dealings or knows others who might have had experiences with this kind of gold digger. Cheers
Stealth gold diggers can be weeded out by shit tests. Its not only women who can do shit tests. Men can do them on their women too to see how they react. If the woman is acting, it will be relatively easy to trigger her and get her to show her true colors.
It’s kind of amazing how so many guys don’t know this. Any woman demanding what YOU HAVE TO DO WITH YOUR MONEY FOR HER is never worth your time. You said it exactly like it is Rich. The first date is nothing more than getting to know her and seeing if you wanna see her again. A woman with the right intentions won’t care if it’s a cup of coffee, or dinner, or whatever it is you decide to do. She’s happy to just be there with you and have a chance with you. Good women like this aren’t worried about what resteraunt you’re taking them to or how much you’re spending on the date. They’re too busy enjoying the time with you to be worried about any of that. Tell demanding, inconsiderate, self-centered women to kick rocks
if she tries to be in control and make decisions on the first few dates and you're paying for it, then just do what she wants, tap it out if you can and just move on to someone else.
I do agree about going to dinner, it can be so painfully awkward having to spend 2-3 hrs with someone that you know within the first 5 mins that there’s no chemistry.
The cost of the wedding and the wedding ring will have ZERO impact on the success of the marriage. Agree with Rich about first date is a sniff test. I do a coffee date, no more than 90 min, I time it too. I would withhold investing anything into the relationship until you've determined she has a high level of interest. Nothing is more annoying than spending $100 on a date and she starts flaking. My rule is no dinners until we've slept together. If only men could realize that the $$ you spend on a date has ZERO impact on the outcome of the relationship. A woman with high interest will sleep with you within 2-3 dates, sometimes less. A woman with low interest will never sleep with you.
A beta will do anything for a woman simply because he doesn't draw in too many women. If you are spoiled for choice, which any high value man should be, you can definitely tell a broad to kick rocks if she comes with any demands, like taking them out to dinner.
I disagree with your definition of a Beta. A Beta male will stay with a woman because they are afraid of being single. An Alpha male isn't afraid of being alone. I have friends who can get other women, but they stick with unsatisfactory women because it's the perceived safe bet. Alpha males take risks, Beta males do not. Look at this scenario. If a guy is a 5/10 in looks, and his girl disrespects him, blows another guy let's say. A Beta male would stay with the girl because he is afraid of being single, he's a 5/10, so getting another girl is risky. An Alpha male, same looks 5/10, would dump her on her butt, probably disrespect her right back, walk out, never talk to her again. He might find another partner, he might not, he doesn't care because he's not accepting disrespect and takes risks. Looks don't mean you're an Alpha.
A stroll in the woods 😂 that sounds SAFE 😂 I’m 100% behind you on the rest but NOT a hike on a first date - that just screams serial killer 😜😂 I would never do that. I always say- let’s go put putting and I’ll bring some shots for prior 😉to make it alittle extra fun! I want to do something where we can laugh and have fun ☺️
There’s a select few comfortable cafe’s I frequent throughout the week. I use those cafe’s and around a 20$ first date estimation as my sniff test. Works pretty well, point being you wanna keep it to a minimalist first date.
The third ring, the suffering, cannot even be measured in money or carats. Don't do the 3 ring circus known as marriage! The element of surprise has been replaced by the element of expectations.
Looking back at all the women I dated before I finally found my sweetie going on 18 months... none of those women were worth the effort I made. None of them mattered in the end, and looking back, it's sooo obvious why each one of them was wrong for me. But you have to sort through them all until you find the woman worth the effort. The first dates speak volumes. If you're unsure about a certain woman, save yourself the effort and time and move on. When you find the right one, you'll do anything for them, and they'll do the same for you.
I disagree. No woman is worth the effort. You probably haven’t experienced it but let me tell you that there is no value you can put on the peace that is brought to you when you stop chasing the pusssaay
Had an LTR that demanded marriage (among other things) to a degree that was unsettling. Held my ground. She must have pulled her IUD shortly after I had enough of the pestering, got knocked up by an associate of mine, and married the slovenly, pudgy, baby trapped fool. Blows my mind, but good riddance to bad rubbish.
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None of this really matters. Hypergamy trumps everything and is infinitely changing or increasing.
Mr. Cooper like the book. I know I'm not a paid member, but I've got a question about a popular situation in the media that also coralates with a chapter in your book.... The Christlys. I guess the two main people are getting sent to jail for fraud. Same crime different length of sentencing. Guess who gets the lesser?? Lol.
You are totally right Rich! Great video ! Same has proven in my experience
Great advice-
What type of man drives a 2 pedal car?
Great advice, but driving a girl car with 2 pedals detracts from your message.
Happy Holidays!
GEG
Spot on and I couldn't agree any more!
15 years ago I was almost engaged to a girl who demanded a ring worth at least $65,000. When I protested she pointed out that I drove a $100,000 Porsche. Believe it or not I sort agreed with her logic. These girls are good at gaslighting us. Good news- I didn’t buy the ring and escaped a potentially miserable marriage. Close call.
a porsche is a great vehicle. its worth the money. a diamond ring is not: its perceived value arises from the fact that a bunch of ppl kanye doesnt like hoarded the most abundant material in the world and then marketed the shit out of it as a symbol of the vague promise of regular sex
Can you employ me please
Good job bro
Sheesh, glad you managed to pull your head out of your ass. My wife’s engagement ring cost me $2500…it sits in the “ring holder” everyday because her fingers got swollen from being pregnant with our twins. She wears another ring that is more comfortable for her. The point is to say that the ring doesn’t matter. I hope every guy here finds someone who genuinely cares for them.
It makes no sense to compare herself against a car, she’s not an object.
My wife chose the ring she got, and it was the least expensive she could find. As the years went by, she never ever thought about upgrading our rings even if we could afford it. We made it to 31 years before she passed away.
I'm sorry man but atleast u knew she was a keeper and loved you, u were lucky
Happy for you and the time you had together and sorry for your loss.
They are looking how men react when they order the most expensive meal in a restaurant, the great test on our side is to bring her at a jeweler to see how expensive the ring she choose is.
My condolences. You are lucky to have shared that time with an amazing partner
Same here and I have thought about downgrading because I like gemstones much better than diamonds
This is SO spot on. 🎯
I proposed to my wife with an engagement ring that cost $99. She was overjoyed. In less than 2 months, we'll be married 25 years. Funny thing: other women are envious of _her,_ not because of a big rock or lack thereof on her finger, but because she's [still] happy to be with me, our boys are grown [not moved out yet, they've just started building themselves/on their grind], our homes are nearly paid off and she doesn't need to work for an income.
Congrats I am genuinely happy for you
You beat the odds on many fronts. Good for you!
Very enviable
nice man thats what i wanted but my girl moved on when i was sick
@@kaelen9906 Sorry to hear that bro. Your girl wasn't committed. Consider it a blessing she left while you were still able and can move on with life. The ones that do grey divorces [retirement years] are the worst.
I've been sick several times in our 30 years total together. The first time was when we were engaged. I was almost bedridden by something or other, could barely get to the bathroom and back, for about 3 weeks. Also unemployed at the time, having recently left a bad gig income-wise. She was working 3 jobs. She could - and perhaps should - have left me then, and her parents were available to easily take her in if she wanted to, but she didn't. That's when I knew she was dependable.
I love how freely he answered to : "Well, what if she says 'no' ?" - "Then you don't go out with her" . We as men tend to overthink stuff when a woman is in our head and don't realize we have a lot more power than we think.
correct, that mindset comes once you realize that we men are the prize!
Bingo; she says no, she's done forever - there's zero potential there, who cares
Exactly forget the Power of the pussy book ( great btw) The power of the wallet my friend ✍🏻💰😉
First date with my latest was a flask of coffee by the river in December. It’s a great test and demonstration of values
@@InvestgoldUK Like that one. Picnics are very underrated date ideas. Once you're together bring some wine/alcohol, some music and blanket and it's a great date especially if you live in a city where you can stop off elsewhere on the way back etc. Any girl who doesn't like that does not like you, period. The women who liked me the most and I had the best relationships with I probably spent $0-40 per average hangout usually
“Women Choose Who They Sleep With But Men Choose Who They Commit Too”💯
to* :D
Women only pick who they open their legs to, they do not pick who gets down on one knee.
To women: Live your best citygirl life but at the end of the day, you're not the one who chooses if you are worth marrying or not.
💯 women are the gatekeepers of sex , and men are the gatekeepers of commitment
Parrot
My brother fell into this trap. The wedding HAD to be on the beach. Meanwhile, no accommodations for a parent with cancer 3 hours away. He chose her side, that's a weak frame.
And she will destroy his life bit by bit 💔
They will split and he will regret. Be ready to forgive...as long as he won’t do it again
Foah what a b****
@@InvestgoldUK No, f that - don't forgive these people. Forgiving them is why shit has gotten so far out of hand.
@@Shyhalu sometimes forgiveness means not letting it bother you. That might include cutting all ties with them.
I dated a great woman, but she insisted on a 2 carat ring. We were in our 20s, so that was laughably impossible. Probably 6-12 months salary, on jewelry! That was the start of the end for me. Thankfully I walked away.
You dodged a bullet Tim. Good thing you had sense and didn't fall for the trap
A good buddy of mine married in his 30s. His GF insisted on a min 1ct diamond engagement ring. This was in the 90s. Soon after the wedding, he dropped by my place, it was unexpected, and he was not happy. Apparently he had a 'spirited' debate with his new wife. He expressed serious doubts about her - one remark I remember very clearly was 'if this marriage survives...'
They are still together after many decades. Roughly 5-7 yrs ago, my wife and I went to his house, Wifey and I sat together on the couch. Across from us, he sat on the couch, his wife chose to sit on the carpet at his feet. This tells me he successfully tamed her. FYI he has an electrical engineering degree. He is self employed. She is a dermatologist. Both high earning people.
Lucky escape.
@@Ace.0.0.0. you don't tame your wife too?
@@honor9lite1337 All I am willing to say is that I have clear & reasonable boundaries. And I have the strength & will to enforce them. At one time my wife deliberately disrespected me. This was not something to be discussed. I merely checked the internet to find a new place to live. When wifey asked me what I was doing, I calmly told her without anger or bitterness. I said I would stop if she gave me a sincere apology and a reasonable assurance it would be the last time. She was not happy that I called her out. She was less happy at being held to account. But she did it, and I chose to stay. FYI her life with is FAR better with me in it. Therefore if she wants to stay, she must be a better wife than any woman who might replace her. This is how to achieve job security. I have told her more than once, I am willing to forgive mistakes and the occasional bad day- because everyone gets them. But I am not willing to forgive disrespect. I am very willing to walk even though we have been together for decades.
My girl was happy with a $10 ring from Claire's that came AFTER I simply asked her to marry me and a courthouse wedding. Still happy together after 11 years.
Top g
Wow, I didn't think any option other than "no ring" was lower than the $99 one I got my wife. Salut.
@@TechnoMageB5 Turns out there's always a cheaper choice somewhere 😆
I did eventually get her something nicer once I had the means to...but it didn't stand as a requirement to having a relationship so she passed that test
@@TechnoMageB5 I've given my girl cheaper rings. Ones I made from 25 cent stainless steel nuts. Now I did put an insane amount of work into them to the point where they could be sold in boutique shops, but hey, material wise they were cheap lol
your woman is 1 in a million.
Great video. Through the lens of a divorce lawyer: there is a whole area of law devoted to engagement ring litigation. An engagement ring is a “conditional gift”. Meaning the engagement ring becomes the sole property of the recipient as soon as the wedding takes place. That means in the event of divorce, the value of the engagement ring does is NOT subject to equitable distribution, whereas other gifts given by each spouse to the other spouse are subject to equitable distribution. Engagement rings are the exception in most jurisdictions. Wife keeps the engagement ring at divorce.
What happens if you buy an engagement ring, and give it to your dearly beloved and someone calls off the wedding? Who gets the ring? The answer is: it depends on the jurisdiction. In some jurisdictions, the courts do not care who calls off the wedding. If no wedding, the ring goes back to the person who gave the ring. In other jurisdictions, the courts examine who called off the wedding and why.
There was a recent case where a woman filed for divorce after about 15 years of marriage. Husband gave her a huge engagement ring 15 years earlier when he asked her to marry him. At divorce, she had the ring appraised and discovered that the ring was made of cubic zirconia. She sued him to try to get the value of the ring as if it were really a diamond. She lost. The court reasoned that she had 15 years to get it appraised, and it only seemed to matter to her in divorce.
Run, (don’t walk) away from anyone who demands a certain size engagement ring. It is just a foreshadowing of things to come.
Great story and insightful.
I've seen you in the comment sections of many of the guys in the manosphere. Just wanted to say your advice is always appreciated and you're a blessing.
Thanks for caring for your fellow man, bud.
Exactly! I was dating a woman for about 3 months, and she attempted to plant seeds in my head about marriage. I played along and knew she was ear-hustling my phone conversation with a salesman concerning a used motorcycle! She then suggested we look at Promise Rings. She was happy with the tiny stones and immediately took me to the engagement ring section! I made the comment I wasn't comfortable spending over 20g on a "Promise Ring"! She said, "but you are willing to spend that on a USED bike?" I simply said, "i can see myself enjoying that bike years down the road!" She said she needed a "grand gesture" from a potential husband(she was married prior). I chose the bike!
@@bertf.291 Grand Gesture? That is totally funny. My response to her would be "be sure and let me know how that Grand Gesture thing works out for you". I'm assuming you go rid of her.
@Colorado Mark yes, I got out of that situation quick! And I still enjoy the bike!!
As a 25 year old, I do financially well and have been dating a lot lately. You make a good point on not wanting to drive your “hotrod” on the first date, I use to take my corvette all the time. Also the hike idea is great, every time I take a pretty lady out for drinks or casual food they order the most expensive shit, yeah I can afford it but who the hell does that on a first date? Strolls In the park is the move now, thanks Rich.
Invite them for a walk. That’s what I do. Rich is on point with this delivery for sure.
You can afford it, but if you keep wasting money on women, you won't be able to afford it. Stop spending money on women, the more you do, the less money you have - the less you have, the less valuable you are to them.
Just increase your own value, SPEND nothing on them - the virtuous girl will be the only one to value that discipline & even if that doesn't exist - among the trash, 3 out of 10 will still stay to leech off you somehow while giving you their P.
What more do you want ? - 3 out of 10 trash girls is a good deal. Getting the virtuous girl is the best deal. No money spent, only earned.
How do you met and ask out all these dates?In person randomly, or via Instagram?
a stroll in the park or a roll in the hay ask her what she likes!
@@cv6176 Strike a random conversation after an eye contact. Sometimes (doesn't always work) when in a restaurant or somewhere - if a lone girl or even a girl in a girl group (this could be sabotaged by the other girls if you don't give them their share of attention), makes eye contact. I calmly walk to her after some time & ask if she knows me from somewhere & I apologize for not recognizing her if she did & tell her it was not my intention to forget her & hurt her feelings.
Usually it can go anywhere from there.
Give a woman a ring💍, she will reward you with suffeRING.😭
Tops!
Straight facts!!
Stay single
The three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
Give them the ring and they legit turn to Sauron
Absolutely CORRECT! Coffee Dates should be the ENTRY point to filter her out IF she even qualifies for a relationship with a man or even you. Remember, this is NO LONGER the era where women are deemed, quality women. So, take that fantasy out of your head and embrace REALITY.
These are great because you can see how they order (get something simple or most expensive), what are they most focused on in the 1st couple of questions, how they treat others (if wait staff is involved), and if they respect your time (being on time, how are they dressed, and how flexible with meeting time). Had many great and terrible dates this way but you can get a quick general feel of someone thru this.
Sounds so spontaneous..relaxing…and romantic….and most importantly..transactional…
Thank youuuuuuu
Shoo I’ll ask if the want maruchan soup for our first date lol 😂
What about a tap water date? 😂
My ltr going well and she's a ten/ten... No ring required... Won her due to frame control and other guidance from my guy Rich Cooper... Forever grateful for unplugging me
She's going to want a ring if you commit to her. No?
@@MrFrank107 yeah she buggin me but mostly for me to wear one lol... i like to keep competition anxiety in play. we had islamic marriage which is the dream as not recognised by the state but means she's fully committed, as am i tbh. technically the ring thing is a western thing
@@nabilislam1848 I'm just saying this from 11 years of experience being married -- as long as you stay attractive, you don't really need to do much to actually keep that competition anxiety in play. It's honestly easier to just be passively generating it than actively generating it
@naaK010 Are you Muslim? If so it shouldnt even be in question, stop delaying!! and you can simply tell her/ let her know (by utilising frame control) that she wont be getting a state marriage as its non sharia so un-necessary for you to fulfil your duties as a husband. If she kicks off just let her know as a high value male you wont have a problem finding another woman willing to accept your terms. Furthermore, as a Muslim the duties as a husband means providing for her entirely, no need for shared account as I pay for everything and pay her some spending money each month (eg sent to her account)... I wouldnt have an issue with shared account and essentially paying for everything (bills mortgage etc) from that, along with giving her a budget for spending money (benefit here is she's at least aware of what you're covering each month) but I would fund this acc with monthly transfer and keep main assets/ earnings separate. If you're not a Muslim, thats the first step and we can have a separate convo about that.
@naaK010 I know I am making this sound easy but I am speaking from experience, the first time round I failed as I wasnt aware of red pill/ Rich Cooper etc and your quintessential 'nice guy' husband that essentially lost her attraction and got asset stripped when she later changed her mind and wanted out (of the state marriage). Never again and never did i think frame control would work so well. New lady knew the score from day 1...want a state wedding: go elsewhere/not interested! Want a husband who is putting a dent in the universe, going places, will provide and care for you, will keep you in your place as a compliant wife?: lets go
It cannot be stressed enough. It's not about convincing a girl to "be into you" over the course of a few dates. It's about finding a woman who "is into you" and then seeing if the chemistry and circumstances are right.
A convinced woman will continually need to be convinced whereas burning desire has to be put out.
Which camp do you want to be in?
My husband asked his mom for his grandma's ring. I couldn't be happier. The history and love and family it represents is amazing. I hope we keep passing it down through the generations. And as for dates, I always insisted on paying for myself the first few dates because I wanted him to know I was there for him. When it got serious I let him pay because he knew I was there for him and I didn't want to emasculate him or be too pushy. It was my way of opening up and taking it to the next level (baby steps!), like the difference between holding hands and finally allowing kissing. I wish dating like that was more normalized. People need to take it slow, respect each other, and make sure they have similar values and goals before rushing headlong into a serious relationship. People need to learn patience and their worth.
I wish more women learned patience and DISCIPLINE because of the amount of men they normally date. Dating today means having sex and no good comes from anybody hopping in bed with as many people as possible. It should be attempted to save for your serious partner. Not a quick fling or friend just because they are hot
I wish more men also applied patience and discipline...and stopped giving women free money and attention. It's a problem created by both sexes.
@@judge831 Women have cheapened sex by giving it to the wrong men and men have cheapened attention by giving it to every woman
God bless you
You would have never seen that ring from me. I would have bought one unique for you but a family heirloom stays with the bloodline. That ring would have gone to your daughter if you had one. If you didn't, it goes to the first daughter of one your husband's siblings. My mother-in-law had lots of jewelry, considering she was a jeweler, and when she passed away it all went to her daughters, granddaughter and great granddaughters, even at my own insistance. None to the boys, those half-wits would probably hock it. You didn't say how long you've been married. My wife and I have been for 48 years since the age of 19.
My ex wife did the EXACT same thing... demanded a specific ring (princess diamond)...it's crazy...the signs were all there from the beginning...
lol "princess diamond" is just a style of cut for the stone. It just means it's square instead of round. It has nothing to do with the size or cost. being hung up on that is autistic af dude. You sure you didn't drive her away?
@@caseypayne5138 No she was very specific...so much so she want to pick it out...so seat down somewhere son...I'm only saying I get what Rich is saying and he's 100% right
@@agentrocklee so she had a design idea she liked? Why is that bad?
Sorry guy, you're losing me here. I agree that some sort of unreasonable demand should be a huge red flag but, like...if she's good to you, she makes you happy, and she loves you -- and you have the means to do it -- what's wrong with also getting her what she wants sometimes? I may have given my wife a cheapo ring from Claire's AFTER just proposing to her in a simple direct way but once I had the means to I got her a real ring. She got to have a say in what it looked like. And I did it because I wanted her to have it, not because she nagged me over it.
@@caseypayne5138 there's nothing wrong with splurging for your woman, I think the question really is... Were you her first choice?... Does she have genuine desire for you?...If I was the guy she initially chose would she have such demands? I've been on both ends of the spectrum... Women I run into now... After taking the red pill and transforming myself, there is no demands, there's no conditions, I can get away with feeding them cookout and they are so happy to be there with me...if they really share that desire for you none of that crap matters
@@agentrocklee "First" choice? What does that mean exactly? I can confidently say that I am her BEST choice and that she still has genuine desire for me. Back then she didn't have any demands, she just wanted to be with me and it didn't matter how.
I found myself in the same situation as you do now. So I didn't have a problem with getting married, it was what I wanted and I don't regret it for a second. I agree with you, man. Demands and conditions are a pretty huge red flag. If something ever happened with my current relationship and I was moving back into the dating world, I'd treat it the same way as you do.
When my wife and I first got together we were both living paycheck to paycheck. We were young and not established yet. I bought her the ring I could afford which wasn't much but she picked it out based on the budget I had. I think it was around $1500. 10 years later for our anniversary we traded that ring in for something much nicer. That was her reward for sticking with me. We are still together 28 years later.
The main thing is loyalty and body count.
If she fails on any of them move on 🤔
@Son-of-Krypton Legitimate questions: Where are you going to get accurate body count data? And how will you know she's loyal without taking a chance on dating her?
On the loyalty part, are you going to play the shit test game with her to test her loyalty? How do you plan to vett her on that part?
This is why you only marry VIRGIN girls that have a zero s3xual or romantic history.
@@gunsandcommissions lm convienced anyone dating in western society should just accept body count to be insane on most women considering the apps giving them unlimited access to sleep around with anyone anytime.
@@gunsandcommissions yeah the body count still confuses me. They're going to lie i don't get it
Best dates I've been on have all been walks. Great way to see how addicted she is to her phone too.
Good point girl on a phone constantly us a deal breaker immediately
hmm seems you were able to see the red flag way before.
If she cares more about the ring or wedding ceremony than you, you need to bail
Agree 100%. First date is not really a date, it's a meeting. Coffee in the morning or a drink in the evening. If you're hitting it off and you want to go another round of drinks, so be it. If not, you excuse yourself and don't waste anymore of each other's time. I've had drinks that led to dinner the same night because were getting along (and she shared the cost) but I never invite them for dinner at the outset.
A woman shouldn’t have to share the cost if you’ve invited her out. 🤦🏼♀️
Men should walk away WAY MORE OFTEN. If she asks for something stupid like that just stand up and walk away at the spot haha
@@useruser_notinuse men should, but they don’t. If she’s cute, they will put up with a lot. It’s how men are wired
You've nailed it , You lay down the terms of the we're and the when, , other wise , if She's starts from the beginning , laying down the rules , that's wood be a RED FLAG.....
I got married this past 7th of October. I still don't have a ring! I told my husband it is not a priority right now and to wait. We didn't have a big budget for a ring and i realized its not a priority. We skipped the ring part of the ceremony but we didn't care. I love him so much. I can always get a ring, who cares!
if not ring atleast have something that symbolise your relationship
Ask him to give you a rubber ring! 🤣🤣🤣
Her: “I won’t marry you without an 8c engagement ring”
My answer: “Awesome. Have a good life”
I dated a woman once, got into a relationship with her, and then she’d bring up marriage. And she always said I got the “deer in the headlights of a Mack truck” look when She mentioned marriage. I knew it wasn’t that she wanted to marry me, she just wanted to get married. And she did. To the next poor sap that came along. And I saw her on FB a while back. Dear god did I dodge a bullet.
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Good of you! Sounds like she dodged a bullet 😂
@@kristir1262 yeah that must be it. 🙄
Same bro
When my husband and I were dating he asked me what type of ring I wanted and if I would be ok with another type of gem instead of a diamond. I told him wouldn’t care what he got me. He ended up buying a ruby ring that costed less then 1k on Amazon, and I love it. We’ll be married for 5 years this coming January🥰 What he’s saying is so true. When a women truly loves her man she won’t care what type of ring he gives her, or about having a big extravagant wedding. She more then likely won’t even care if it was just the two of you getting married at a courthouse or a church and she’s wearing cute little dress instead of a big wedding dress. Same goes with dating, she won’t care where you go and what you do. She’s just happy to get to know you and spend time with you. At the end of the day all she wants is to marry the love of her life, have babies with him, and grow old together.
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Well you're a woman who says "costed" so that is about what you're worth.
Now, if you could just TEACH THE CLASS. 🤣 Everything you said is spot-on. These online presentations make it sound as though ALL WOMEN are jerks, which simply isn't true. We guys DO need to be cautious, but hyper-vigilance is the ticket to unhappiness. Thanks!
My husband didn't have any car at our first date. We were scheduled to meet for coffee/lunch. But he called me saying that he was coming to walk me to the coffee shop. That was a great demonstration of care and affection. He holded my hand down the street and we went by bus. Also, he set the tone for our relationship.
Men out there, wake up early, organize yourselves, be confident and truthful to your words. So, you will find a lady that values you. Man and woman have different rules in life/family. Men are the gates to protect the house and the family. The women are the pillar to keep the roof/family in place.
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Amen
Coffee and a walk has always been my go to. You can cut it off at anytime if needed and it won’t cost u much $ or time.
My wife insisted her wedding ring be made from aquamarine rather than diamond. That was her only stipulation, "diamond requires no imagination" was her reason. I bought her the nicest aquamarine engagement ring I could find and followed it up a year later with a nice aquamarine bracelet. She is a very happy wife.
Great post! This is 100% down to earth reality. Take a woman out for coffee and if you vibe with her go for a walk or bite to eat. Don’t waste time on a woman who doesn’t show interest in you. She is not the prize, you are.
Would like to add here, that men need to put in the work to make themselves the prize. Too many pampered grown up boys nowadays. Not enough real men!!
The first dates very often set the tone of the relationship. Always set the tone that you want, and those who don't like it will not end up in a relationship with you.
I don’t invite anything into my life anymore
I went on a. Date with a Guy, he. Said my. Laugh is chieldish, he didnt smiled at All 😬😅😲
Well happy it was just 1.date☺️👌😅
Spot on.
Told my girl I was getting her a ring pop for engagement ring. Obviously joking but also subliminally not a joke. I had already heard her talk about showing it off to other girls and the ring so-and-so got and I nipped that in the bud immediately - explained to her that if the ring is about her flexing on other girls she can find another guy to marry. She changed her behavior almost instantly.
Very occasionally I introduce my wife as "my first wife." It is the truth. Also a subliminal message. We are married since the mid 90s. Together for 5 more yrs.
My husband got me a ring from the vintage section of the jewelry store and negotiated it down an impressive amount (you could either have these potentially continue to collect dust or I could pay you out in cash right now for a little less than the price tag😉). He knew I didn't want it to be thousands of dollars because I like to stretch my dollar. It would hurt to know if that much money would go into a ring instead of savings, travel or something more important.
That was my ring also! Both of us vtg rings. Actually did the wedding ring backwards and custom made from travel memories. So engagement band and wedding ring with a stone haha. I didn't know any better I didn't have any practice and didnt plan on a do-over either
Absolutely this was my exact approach. Never took a chick out to dinner on a first date and never bought random girls drinks at the bar.
a walk through nature, she will reveal all of her self!! grab a drimk at end and you fuck the next time you meet up
I agree, I've been approachedby women who wanted to join me on gym, run and swim-sessions. The point is that if they're interested enough (have the desire for you) they will be satisfied just by being in your company.
I've been following your "20 dollars max for the first date" rule and its been working great and has saved me a lot of money as a young guy. Thanks for the additional wisdom Rich, big fan of your work.
That's even a lot.
Coffee, tea at a fancy coffee shop doesn't cost 20 dollars mate
"You must buy me"
Neon Red flag that equals immediate breakup
I took my wife for a first date for a quick walk then to a 6 dollar tempura spot. It was greasy as hell and I brought my friend along. She was shocked. But the way she looked in my eyes was real. I could feel it. Instead of sitting opposite of each other we were sitting next to each other. The dynamic was fun. I felt she really really liked me. I then made up for the cheap food by taking her up the five star hotel suite I was staying, ordered some champagne and chocolate cake. She had no idea about my status. She looked up to me and asked: "Are you a King or something?" Talking about underpromise and overdeliver. Now 6 years in 2 kids. And the engagement ring? 500 dollar one I got in Antwerp. We sold it for travel. No marriage ring neither. We don't do scams anymore and definitely not the diamond one.
well done 👏
Very good points, as you have said, just listen & they will tell you all you need to know.
Keele Street & 17th sideroad. Hey, that's just West of 'Snowball'. That rolling country road is beautiful in the summer, but in the winter it is often icy and treacherous. Best to use it only if you have really 'soft' winter tires on your vehicle (I know from experience). King Township really does not do a good job salting the roads there in the winter months. Your advice is 'spot on', but even when you do find a 'good' girl, she will change as time goes on, and usually not for the better.
as a female i can say this is ACCURATE! if we TRULY love a man material things wont matter. if she NEEDS something MATERIAL to be with you thats because she doesnt really care about you.
My wife and I have been together since university (2015) she's only ever been with me, after university we bought our rings together. They were on clearance and we got the engagement and wedding bands for less than $800.
Instead of a fancy wedding we eloped and we used that money to buy our first vehicle (used) in cash for $14k.
She's an amazing cook and baker, she's a stay at home mom, she homeschools our children, and she's the wind in my sails. We have 3 children (more on the way).
I'm 32 and she's 29. I make over $100k with my full-time job and i have a side business as well. I wouldn't be where I was if she hadn't been my cheerleader and took care of me all this way (emotionally and physically).
Her and I hate that we're the exception. We're super happy and our friends aren't 😞.
My wife listens a lot to the Suzanne Venker show on female nature and it's been an even better result in our communication between us.
I'm super blessed and I wish others were too.
It's love that matters. It's what keeps life worth living. Too many get caught up in the symbols of love (ie. ring, house, car) while completely denying the source of those symbols. It's like going to a restaurant and wanting the sign outside and not the restaurant itself or the yummy food they serve. Unbelievable!
Very good segment and advice, Rich. It's nice to listen to you tell us about red flags and then realizing that my girl doesn't have any of them 😅😂😉
Happy for you brotha
@@dasbo1992 she's a rare breed. When you find one, you have to hold on tight 😅
I dont know how I stumbled on your video but I couldn't agree more. My husband and I met in the military before covid but really started "dating" at the hight of it all. We got confined to base where we couldnt leave the base for 9 months straight, so we couldn't go on a dinner date, we walked the base together, listened to the foxes laughing at dusk from a little grove of pine trees, shared our boxed lunches together. Watched helicopters doing testflights from a hilltop. At the end of all that we got posted apart and got engaged when I came home for Christmas 6 months later. He proposed with a ring passed down from his mother, I honestly couldn't tell you it's value because It's not something I've ever needed to think about.
My husband once said, and I happen to agree that an engagement ring should be made of brass so that if you want it to look beautiful you must polish it and give it attention each day. In the spirt of that every day I would take some isopropyl alcohol and shine the gold and dimonds up. It was my little tradition while I spent 8 more months away from him.
Our wedding (still during covid nonsense) was in the backyard, I wore my white 1950s prom dress, he wore a fair isle sweater I knitted him, it cost the price of the marriage certificate and officiant. I wouldnt have it any other way because I love him and money doesn't buy love.
I've seen so many friends of mine cowtow to a woman, if you do it once it will never stop, she'll want the wine and dine date, she'll want the expensive ring, the perfect wedding, the perfect house, money for clothes, to be endlessly pampered during her pregnancy, she'll never work to get back in shape, the birth will have to go her way, the kids will go to a private school so on and so forth until last but not least she'll want the kids and half your paycheck. Protect yourself from these vultures lads they are insufferable.
Love this and god bless you. We need more women who think like you.
Great comment! Best wishes to you and your family.
First date walking, totally agree. You learn so much about her attitudes, traits, and even values from just taking a 20 minutes stroll around the pond, park or whatever. Get her out into nature and see how she acts and reacts to stimuli.
Wow, that's what we did on our first date and many after other. 27 years married and we still go for walks and love the outdoors.
my wife didn't even care that I bought no engagement ring :-)
I would never play this bs game
if she has one single rule on you, leave her be.
Get better, improve and return to dating after having progress.
repeat.
People reveal themselves in the details of every interaction with another humanbeing. If anything she does sets off an internal alarm, don't gloss over it. Take a closer look.
You do great work, Rich.
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You are so right Rich, nothing worse than a date with a “boss babe” on a “Foodie Call”.
I bought my wife's engagement ring; it was one someone else had put on a payment layaway plan and couldn't pay it off. I paid off the balance, which was about $200, we have been married 28 years and she is the glue that has held our marriage together through some very difficult times.
These videos you put out are precious. Thank you for your service to mankind
The fact that guys have to told this is kinda sad. A girl saying, "you have to buy me an 8 carat ring" and the guy actually sticking around, let alone actually buying it for her, just speaks to a whole other dimension of scarcity.
It is very sad
Listen here- the heart isn’t logical. You wake up later and realize 😂😂
Even more sad is when a guy worth 8 figures (allegedly) can still be fooled by this type of behaviour lol. They say money makes you alpha, but I guess not always.
@@jamesg1974a that's female speak dude. It's plenty logical. He didn't think he could do any better and he would literally put up with anything.
Have to wonder what’s more pathetic, the fact that she’s made those demands or the fact that the dude has not only considered said demands but is actually looking to fulfill those demands! The beta thirst runs too deep in that one!
I appreciate the content you are creating Mr Coope
Shine bright as always
I kept it simple (in terms of money) with my girl. Long story short we met when I was working overseas and I told her she can either come with me back to the US or we are through since I don’t do long distance. Fast forward a bit, I put her through the grinder and she accompanied with me to see my family in Colombia and we went through long treks in the jungle as well as touring some of the not so nice areas of the country. Fast forward more we are living in a 1000 sqft apartment with my dad all while I’m trying to build my business and she’s helping me along the way. Not only that but my proposal was done my own way, with me proposing to her in a little Cessna while flying over the city and telling her to read the in flight manual as I told her that the plane was experiencing engine trouble. The ring was an emerald, it was relatively simple, and it didn’t cost much. Our wedding was small and our wedding dinner was at a BBQ place. Not only that but I made her sign a postnuptial agreement. Not once has she complained that I should give her what she deserves.
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About a year ago I went on a date with a woman who had been cheated on by her ex. We met on a dating app, but before our date, she found my profile on a different dating app where I had used a different name (because woman google my real name all the time) so she questioned me about that. Then she changed the time of our date and I agreed to meet her at an earlier time, but I made the mistake of not making her decide the venue or activity. One thing I learned from Rich is that you always make the girl plan the date if she changes the previous arrangement. Anyways, it was probably the worst date in my life. She was super paranoid and her voice sounded like a witch. Her body was nice which is why I wanted to meet her, but her attitude was terrible. I honestly wanted to run away within 30 seconds of meeting her.
@@brizzo1012 Soon as they bring up ex's l look at them as a one night stand 🤣
I strongly disagree, you plan the first date and if she tries to change it , RUN.
@@stuartkarlson307 Yes, she said she wanted to meet a friend at an earlier time. I told her "Its fine, but if you're going to go on a date with some other dude, then I don't want to change the time for that" She said she understood, but never said if the friend was a guy or girl. Anyways, she kept questioning me because I said I had to meet a guy later that day to buy a snowboard off him from Craigslist (which was true). She didn't believe me.
@@23ofSeptember, it was already time to cut her off and move on. I just tell them, "Well, it sounds like this plan won't work, so we can just play it by ear and set up another time, or whatever." Then, I get off the phone. They NEVER HEAR FROM ME AGAIN.
You are right on point with everything you have said. One point of interest; make sure that the woman didn’t just get out of another relationship. Make sure there is a reasonable amount of time before she dates again. You will end up being just a filler for her for the time being. Also, if you have any type of wealth, make sure you have a prenuptial in place and if she’s not willing to sign off on it, then she’s not for you and that will answer all of your questions about her.
Met my wife of 33 years in college. Our first date was in the library then out for coffee. We were poor college students so going out for pizza was a big date. Good advice to keep it low key at first. You will both know if there is something to keep it going or not and it makes it easy for either to bow out respectfully and drama free.
Great points. I always start small and give more as the relationship progresses, that way you know if she wants you and is with you for the right reasons. Also if you are a high value man, you don't want to commit to a dinner for 2-3 hours. Short, a coffee for 30-45 min and you can decide after that if you want to take her out once again on a dinner. Don't over commit from the beginning to giving so much!
Thanks Rich, now we got epilepsia because of the top right corner sun flicker
Hahaha, good one!
The first diamond ring was really carved out of the ring itself. They were so tiny. Yet she loved me and stayed with me. Now she wears a ring handed down from her family.
David DeAngelo said that if a women ever dictated to him where he was going to take her on a date, he would respond in a normal voice, "Sure. When are you going to pick me up?"
You and your purpose come first. Women come after that.
I'm a huge advocate for coffee on the first date. I asked a girl if she wanted to get to know each other over a cup of coffee and she was down. I ran 10- 15 minutes late but I told her to grab a table. She did. When I got there, she got a table and her own cup of coffee. I walked in, greeted her, and sat down. We talked for a couple of hours and the date went good enough to where she texted me later and wanted to go out again. And the highlight of that date was the fact that I didn't pay a fuckin dime.
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😂😂😂😂😂😂🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡
@Peggy Gilespie it's not that I don't want to pay for a date; it's a matter of principle. I've been on plenty of dates where I've payed upwards to $200 and the date/ relationship doesn't work out from the start. As a guy, going on a date and money isn't involved is equivalent to a girl going on a date and sex isn't involved. In other words, they like you for you. In regards to the settle insult you added about me being broke; I'm not rich by any means. But I don't have any debt of any kind and I religiously save money. I have nothing to prove but I'm not going to let someone insult the hard work and sacrifices I've made to get to where I am now. And this goes back to not wanting to be taken advantage of financially by a woman.
You'll crap all over her in no time and dump her for some sloot that demands stuff. Don't deny it either because that will confirm that you have no self awareness.
You sound like a loser. So I’ll fill u in a bit the provider/protector vibe is attractive also character matters
I am 50 and have had more than a few women in my life. Not once did I take them on an "official" date. Why do men date at all? I live in Scandinavia and we don't have a dating culture here like in North America. I have nothing against dating, but if you want to meet, attract and keep beautiful women it's definitely not necessary to date.
I don't get it.
I notice women are often intimidated by dinner dates. In my limited experience, they'd be more open to an off-the-cuff daytime coffee run, or casual meet at the local dive. Also, Joker from Better Bachelor used to work in a jewelry shop. He thought it was odd that women with their fiance's would come in and ask for either a different ring or for a ring he picked out to be modified in some way. These men went out of their way, reading up on stuff like birthstones and things men don't normally know, and tried to suss out a ring that would represent their love for their fiance'es, but to the women it wasn't good enough.
Wow, that was me 20+ years ago. My fiancée and HER MOTHER went ring shopping with me. I was young and stupid. She didn't bat an eyelid when I told her the ring was going to cost my entire life savings. Fast forward to now, I'm sleeping on the futon in the spare bedroom, and we're divorcing if we can't work things out.
Men, don't dismiss the red flags. Scarcity mindset is a killer. Your value will continue to increase over time, so don't be afraid to end a relationship before marriage if there are red flags.
100 percent agreed ..spot on .... This is an advice that must be taken or just keep on paying and get nothing out of it
All true! Even the ones who show good faith are after one thing and that's financial security with your money not theirs. Be careful and keep your worth.
Gents ( quick story), I bought the girl the ring she wanted (was like 1300 ) after a discussion about the promise that a ring signifies, not the cost only to have “you only spent 1300 on my ring bla bla bla” post relationship.... I wouldn’t spend even half of that now if I did get married... the fact that I had to explain to her I wasn’t spending 10g on something that sits on her finger that she could potentially loose as a qualifier to marry her should of rang some bells in my head!! Don’t be a Jarrod, walk away boys!!
Rich, I agree that is probably a really good way to weed out the women who care about expensive things over the guy. I would also add for the long-term relationship aspect that if she stands by you through hard times, specifically with money or work, she has got to be a keeper. If she supports you and tries to build you up when you’re struggling, there is a woman who genuinely cares for you.
First time watching this channel, great video and spot on. I either take a girl out for drinks or even just a walk in a scenic area. The walk is my usual go to. If a girl is cool enough to just spend time with me and not have me buy anything for her, it’s a good sign.
Cannot agree more, well summarised. Learnt all this myself and was brave enough to pull the plug just in time before any (financial) commitment.I find the “how to become an elegant lady” thing absolut hilarious, just remember this quote: “You can take the girl out from the village, but you cannot take the village out of the girl!”
you are bang on - but easier said than done.
Bro, if you live in a cold country- mine is cold enough (-40 C at winter), it is considered a common courtesy to invite a girl on a date to any indoor facility. And it always comes with a price, so it is only natural to meet in a nice cozy cafe or in a coffee place. I only pay for the meal if I enjoy a company, if a person acts entitled - screw her. Also I choose places I enjoy, not otherwise. On a second date I take a girl to play Russian pyramid. Because I like playing it and having a conversation. Also it is a hard game to play and it shows all the flows in character within 1 hour.
Thank you Rich, coming from a 20 year old guy, this is fatherly advice I very much needed.
A good woman would want you to be intentional with her time and yours. I guess some have time for simple coffee dates but it's not creative or romantic IF you're looking to be inspired about love. I rather have a man take the first date to showcase about his hobbies/ interests. Great first or low cost date options depending on your interests: art galleries, college exhibits, Lime bike share rides, wine walks, food exhibits like touring a chocolate factory, for ladies like me who enjoy cars, I have a vette - going to car shows/ looking at rims, free movie/comedy shows if you sign up for the email list, charcuterie picnic, neighborhood farmers market, Cold stone creamery, blue berry picking at a farm, playing pool tables, taking a ferry ride. Plenty of ideas!
You are so right
Fascinating and important topic! The gold diggers ⛏ Though I’m more interested in stealth gold diggers and have made it part of my skill set to spot them..ever since I heard two of them when I was a teenager and helping out at my neighbor’s party (they were 7 figure wealthy people). Two divorced women there were blabbing, no doubt helped by the martinis 🍸 they were drinking, about how they played their husband for fools because they only pretended to love them, be good housewives etc. But they had an exit strategy of no more than 10 years. The one said she couldn’t last for more than 5 years..and the other said she needed to wait until 10yrs due to a prenup. Eavesdropping, I absorbed this conversation thinking down the road this is extremely important intel to know. I haven’t heard hardly anyone talk about the stealth gold diggers, but I help friends and acquaintances with this. Some have been ‘victims’ of this level of gold digging. But unfortunately it rarely gets talked about and hardly anyone knows what to look out for!
I’m curious if anyone else has had dealings or knows others who might have had experiences with this kind of gold digger.
Cheers
Stealth gold diggers can be weeded out by shit tests. Its not only women who can do shit tests. Men can do them on their women too to see how they react. If the woman is acting, it will be relatively easy to trigger her and get her to show her true colors.
It’s kind of amazing how so many guys don’t know this. Any woman demanding what YOU HAVE TO DO WITH YOUR MONEY FOR HER is never worth your time. You said it exactly like it is Rich. The first date is nothing more than getting to know her and seeing if you wanna see her again. A woman with the right intentions won’t care if it’s a cup of coffee, or dinner, or whatever it is you decide to do. She’s happy to just be there with you and have a chance with you. Good women like this aren’t worried about what resteraunt you’re taking them to or how much you’re spending on the date. They’re too busy enjoying the time with you to be worried about any of that. Tell demanding, inconsiderate, self-centered women to kick rocks
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Agree, Unfortunately "demanding, inconsiderate, self-centered women" is the vast majority of women nowadays.
Saying "no" for the fancy dinner on the first date is part of the "no" shit test. "Frame is every thing." ― RT
Extra-Excellent episode!
if she tries to be in control and make decisions on the first few dates and you're paying for it, then just do what she wants, tap it out if you can and just move on to someone else.
On point Rich.
It starts bad, it goes bad and ends bad.
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AMEN brother, you nailed it well 👍😎🏆💪
I do agree about going to dinner, it can be so painfully awkward having to spend 2-3 hrs with someone that you know within the first 5 mins that there’s no chemistry.
The cost of the wedding and the wedding ring will have ZERO impact on the success of the marriage. Agree with Rich about first date is a sniff test. I do a coffee date, no more than 90 min, I time it too. I would withhold investing anything into the relationship until you've determined she has a high level of interest. Nothing is more annoying than spending $100 on a date and she starts flaking. My rule is no dinners until we've slept together. If only men could realize that the $$ you spend on a date has ZERO impact on the outcome of the relationship. A woman with high interest will sleep with you within 2-3 dates, sometimes less. A woman with low interest will never sleep with you.
A beta will do anything for a woman simply because he doesn't draw in too many women. If you are spoiled for choice, which any high value man should be, you can definitely tell a broad to kick rocks if she comes with any demands, like taking them out to dinner.
I disagree with your definition of a Beta. A Beta male will stay with a woman because they are afraid of being single. An Alpha male isn't afraid of being alone. I have friends who can get other women, but they stick with unsatisfactory women because it's the perceived safe bet. Alpha males take risks, Beta males do not. Look at this scenario. If a guy is a 5/10 in looks, and his girl disrespects him, blows another guy let's say. A Beta male would stay with the girl because he is afraid of being single, he's a 5/10, so getting another girl is risky. An Alpha male, same looks 5/10, would dump her on her butt, probably disrespect her right back, walk out, never talk to her again. He might find another partner, he might not, he doesn't care because he's not accepting disrespect and takes risks. Looks don't mean you're an Alpha.
Your videos shot in your cars are always the best.
❤️⤴️.
A stroll in the woods 😂 that sounds SAFE 😂
I’m 100% behind you on the rest but NOT a hike on a first date - that just screams serial killer 😜😂
I would never do that.
I always say- let’s go put putting and I’ll bring some shots for prior 😉to make it alittle extra fun! I want to do something where we can laugh and have fun ☺️
This. Walk where people can see you or go to a coffee shop. Stay away from the bushes.
There’s a select few comfortable cafe’s I frequent throughout the week. I use those cafe’s and around a 20$ first date estimation as my sniff test. Works pretty well, point being you wanna keep it to a minimalist first date.
❤️⤴️
The third ring, the suffering, cannot even be measured in money or carats. Don't do the 3 ring circus known as marriage! The element of surprise has been replaced by the element of expectations.
Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering...
Your videos are much appreciated
I have several vehicles ranging from excellent to average. I always use the average ones to date women, weeding out the gold diggers.
beautiful car ride Rich! thanks for the video!
❤️⤴️
My wife was just telling me yesterday how much she loves for $20 ring 😅
Snow and ice over in BC, looks so nice in Ontario
Looking back at all the women I dated before I finally found my sweetie going on 18 months... none of those women were worth the effort I made. None of them mattered in the end, and looking back, it's sooo obvious why each one of them was wrong for me. But you have to sort through them all until you find the woman worth the effort. The first dates speak volumes. If you're unsure about a certain woman, save yourself the effort and time and move on. When you find the right one, you'll do anything for them, and they'll do the same for you.
I disagree. No woman is worth the effort.
You probably haven’t experienced it but let me tell you that there is no value you can put on the peace that is brought to you when you stop chasing the pusssaay
As usual sir….on point👌🏼
Had an LTR that demanded marriage (among other things) to a degree that was unsettling. Held my ground. She must have pulled her IUD shortly after I had enough of the pestering, got knocked up by an associate of mine, and married the slovenly, pudgy, baby trapped fool. Blows my mind, but good riddance to bad rubbish.
Good advice, I like the hike idea as apposed to dinner.