The worst campaign I ever joined - RPG Story (NSFW)

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  • Опубликовано: 4 дек 2024

Комментарии • 2,5 тыс.

  • @brachyzoid
    @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +1325

    I didn't realize this video got this much around and people are actually subscribing. I want to thank you so much for your interest! this might be the force that drives me to try and do another video, not sure what to talk about.
    But be assure that I will try to get something done, I just keep fighting myself as to what constitutes a good art style and just stopping myself from doing any progress... so keep an eye out! I will try to get something done for you lovely folk!

    • @ayebee1237
      @ayebee1237 5 лет назад +7

      thanks, youtube algorithm!
      jokes aside, pretty good stuff

    • @datalysjr3339
      @datalysjr3339 5 лет назад +3

      Honestly you’re art style is just awesome, and besides if you didn’t think a DND video wouldn’t get any recognition, boi u just cray

    • @lordphobius3876
      @lordphobius3876 5 лет назад +2

      God damn Brachy, this was fucked up! Funny video dude, I'll be sure to stop by your Twitch streams sometime!

    • @KingAce0
      @KingAce0 5 лет назад

      You should have destroyed his world and forced him to make a new one.

    • @Emi_Warlock
      @Emi_Warlock 5 лет назад

      Watch Goblin Slayer ;)

  • @shenn.annagins7176
    @shenn.annagins7176 5 лет назад +4428

    There are times when I feel like I’m a terrible DM...
    And then I saw this and now I can objectively say that I’m not.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +234

      We all DMs have a lot to learn. ESPECIALLY what NOT to do

    • @epicgamer-ny4fj
      @epicgamer-ny4fj 5 лет назад +14

      @@brachyzoid so like, I must ask:how long do you think it would take before this video gets a strike?

    • @OpenDistrict
      @OpenDistrict 5 лет назад +36

      I dm for my friends and it’s sometimes hard for me to make really long quests story type things so I do a bunch of small ones and I feel like I fail when I do it but then I watched this and I’m like you know what I’m good

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 5 лет назад +15

      @@OpenDistrict That's a perfectly legit method of GM'ing...
      I have a handful of "stock" scenarios that I go to for new Tables and Players... and for thirty odd years, setting a campaign up by a series of small adventures has served me very well in keeping the Players engaged, changing stuff around as I needed, and serving up a reliable game every time I'm called upon to do so.
      We regularly "Rotate" the GM-position, too... SO there isn't a lot of benefit for creating something too epic to be done in a short (4 or 5, usually... 6 outside) series of sessions, and then the next person takes up wherever and however you left off... Runs with whatever inspiration they've got... or opens from whatever stock they've put together... and then we continue...
      It's wonky, disjointed, and chaotic... Sometimes someone remembers a villain we haven't dealt with in weeks, and just brings them back into the game... and sometimes I have something set up so perfectly for the next adventure I have in mind... and the next GM takes a wild "curve" off into some weird tangent or whatever... and you know what? I can appreciate the mental gymnastics of trying to figure out how I'm ever going to get my new adventure hooked into "that mess now"... Lolz...
      BUT seriously, I've long figured the only difference between a series of short "one-shot" adventures and a campaign of epic proportions... is the publishing house that charges for the campaign materials. You keep running YOUR game, and you'll pick up and grow and learn as a GM along the way. That's really all there is to it...
      ...well, that... and not going completely out of your way to offend as many Players as possible at the Table. There's nothing wrong with this GM's content... EXCEPT that he didn't clear it with his Players before the Game Session... Just a notice at "Session 0", "Hey guys, I'm in a mischievous mood, so I'm thinking about running a mostly erotica type of game. Cool?"
      This gives the Players a chance to understand what's about to happen, and they can then respond, "Cool" because they're aware it's going "that way"... OR they can just as easily say, "I'm only here to play a hack and slash. I'd really rather you didn't."
      I've had games go both directions. Some Players are up for it, and some are not. As a GM I can oblige and abide. ;o)

    • @feudaltrinity7831
      @feudaltrinity7831 5 лет назад +4

      Honestly, free writing helps a ton. I’m basing my current adventure on almost exclusively down time activities like mercantilism, trade, archaeology expeditions and a few bosses. Buying your own Airship is possible with enough money. All this takes place in the world of one of my written works. It’s almost perfect and writes itself.
      It takes time. I was never this good at campaign creation before. It takes a lot of trial and error

  • @rsplayer2006
    @rsplayer2006 5 лет назад +3595

    I am surprised that no one walked out after hearing the game intro, I would have.

    • @Leostar-Regalius
      @Leostar-Regalius 5 лет назад +86

      if it stopped before that, it would've been better

    • @superspazzninja5297
      @superspazzninja5297 5 лет назад +11

      Yeah same

    • @LORDOFDORKNESS42
      @LORDOFDORKNESS42 5 лет назад +145

      ...Kinda reminded me of old-school mythology, honestly. Like, The Earth and Sky needing to be kept apart by one of their sons, least they smash so much and so hard that they kill all life in-between them.
      Not making a word of that up, by the way, beyond not bothering with the super-serial sounding names & terms. That's seriously the Egyptian creation myth.

    • @highkey5242
      @highkey5242 5 лет назад +73

      Yeah, or like how the roman pantheon was full of vore, incest, and lots of other fun topics

    • @wschippr1
      @wschippr1 5 лет назад +76

      rsplayer2006
      The DM just lifted that story from real Sumerian mythology. Sex is pretty common in creation myths.

  • @DrPluton
    @DrPluton 5 лет назад +2329

    Besides all the creepy monsters with dongs, it bothered me that the DM could casually try to write the halfling's backstory. Halflings are not children and should not be treated as such in game.

    • @shadowpeople2645
      @shadowpeople2645 5 лет назад +85

      *fieldgoal kicks haflings* im sorry what?

    • @StefanoTheBrazilian
      @StefanoTheBrazilian 5 лет назад +63

      Well, some are, but not this halfling

    • @matthewmullinax6026
      @matthewmullinax6026 5 лет назад +30

      Unless it's for world building, like a racial thing.

    • @HivisoftheScale
      @HivisoftheScale 5 лет назад +67

      Agreed! In Dark Sun Halflings are vicious bloodthirsty cannibals, in pathfinder (in certain nations) they are abused slaves, and in Eberron they are bad ass dinosaur tamers! This story reeks of a lazy GM.

    • @ReiDosSnipers
      @ReiDosSnipers 5 лет назад +23

      Halflings arent children they are little babys that should be thrown at flying enemys to cut of wings

  • @chrma_
    @chrma_ 5 лет назад +2131

    The second he said "futanaris" my soul departed this world.

    • @dr.amazaier1772
      @dr.amazaier1772 4 года назад +34

      I closed the video, but I'm back.

    • @taznixx1126
      @taznixx1126 4 года назад +44

      I had to pause the video for a quick breather.

    • @Luciffrit
      @Luciffrit 4 года назад +43

      I rubbed my hands together and let out an excited... "Oh boi!" ( ͡ಥ ͜ʖ ͡ಥ)

    • @commandercaptain4664
      @commandercaptain4664 4 года назад +40

      Me: You mean Futurama?
      DM: No. NO.
      Me: ... The Flintstone Kids, maybe?

    • @cyryl3827
      @cyryl3827 4 года назад +20

      I could imagine with someone going for that sort of world genesis... as a way to laugh at real world mythologies, there was a bunch of silly stuff in them.. of a sexual nature.
      But.. then there is the rest.
      Just.. the futanari godesses are a yellow card, that may or may not, be just some humour.

  • @edwardnugent9040
    @edwardnugent9040 5 лет назад +489

    Ya know, I always hate it when DM ends up standing for Dungeon Masturbator

    • @reverie5760
      @reverie5760 4 года назад +2

      69 likes. nice.

    • @garfoofian8507
      @garfoofian8507 4 года назад +5

      *depraved

    • @leos.2322
      @leos.2322 4 года назад +2

      The mighty coomer DM

    • @mosstdev
      @mosstdev 4 года назад

      Exactly!! I prefer a Dungeon Masterdebater

    • @ReD-zc3uu
      @ReD-zc3uu 4 года назад

      I think the term "Degenerate Masturbator" suits the case much better :P

  • @burgerpossum24
    @burgerpossum24 5 лет назад +3207

    the fact that this was an oversexualized adventure and also treated one of the players characters as a CHILD really doesnt hit me well.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +269

      I have such sights to show you of my bad luck in that college group.

    • @bennie1202
      @bennie1202 5 лет назад +76

      I shutter to think what would have happened to the PCs at some point if they kept meeting

    • @AlexReynard
      @AlexReynard 5 лет назад +23

      That is a highly cute possum icon.

    • @frogoverlord3471
      @frogoverlord3471 5 лет назад +22

      The fact that my sorcerer charicter is a 15 year old halfling makes me mad aswell it also wouldnt work because she ran away from her parents because her mom tried to burn her alive and her dad is just kinda gone

    • @arialblack3279
      @arialblack3279 5 лет назад +3

      ok furry

  • @firstname7606
    @firstname7606 5 лет назад +4369

    Dm: *makes sexualized campaign*
    Everyone else: Haha I'm in danger

    • @NkGaming-1101
      @NkGaming-1101 5 лет назад +63

      If my girlfriend ever starts being interested in DnD and she becomes a DM then you might as well place an “NSFW” label on the door

    • @absolstoryoffiction6615
      @absolstoryoffiction6615 5 лет назад +9

      I have a solution... *XxxEdgeMasterxxX*

    • @NkGaming-1101
      @NkGaming-1101 5 лет назад +4

      .-.

    • @GizzmoDerBaer
      @GizzmoDerBaer 5 лет назад +21

      I am running a campain right now and am going to take some inspiration from "goblin slayer" to make the goblins more fearsome. I feel like They are handled like a little nuisance, when they can be a family murdering and torturing calamity. So people burning on stakes, being stabbed hundred of times and rape are going to be the instruments that are going to be used for that. However sexual stuff for the sake of imagining porn as a group us something that does not belong at a pen and paper game, unless everyone wants to play a traveling group of prostitutes.

    • @maduinargentus5878
      @maduinargentus5878 5 лет назад +25

      I've played sexualized campaigns.
      I've DM horny campaigns.
      Aside from the fact that this sort of thing is something you need to run by your players beforehand, "things have their dicks out and thew world is made of cum" isn't sexualized as much as it's the DM's dick fetish

  • @Zeno11Salazar
    @Zeno11Salazar 5 лет назад +1058

    That DM was WAY too comfortable exposing his fetishes to his players.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +96

      4chaners be like that

    • @Merc7734
      @Merc7734 5 лет назад +60

      @@brachyzoid Not even 4chaners are this comfortable with their fetishes in public! I should know since my best friend is one and he does drawing commissions on the boards

    • @4saken404
      @4saken404 5 лет назад +34

      Much in the same way that most guys aren't comfortable whipping out their dick and masturbating in front of their players. _And_ actively involving the players in their masturbation fantasy. All without consent, of course. Because this is the mental/psychological equivalent of that.
      I was going to say that this is about as far as you can push something like this without it being a crime. But even though it may not qualify as sexual assault it still 100% could be considered sexual harassment. And "in most modern legal contexts, sexual harassment is illegal." en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_harassment

    • @niallreid7664
      @niallreid7664 5 лет назад +26

      On /tg/ they fucking HATE people who are like this with a burning passion so it's not the norm there. Dude just probably frequents /d/ and wanted to make a game about it.

    • @ShannonBlake444
      @ShannonBlake444 5 лет назад +19

      It almost seems like his fetish IS exposing himself to his players 😂
      I bet it's some kinda outlet he wishes he can have

  • @GhostedJackal
    @GhostedJackal 5 лет назад +847

    And THIS is why session zero is so important. There's a party out there really interested in phallus-wielding goblin girls, I'm sure, but before you start describing vein placement you need to be ABSOLUTELY 100% TOTALLY SURE that party is the one sitting at your table.

    • @Dreigonix
      @Dreigonix 4 года назад +14

      .>

    • @GhostedJackal
      @GhostedJackal 4 года назад +65

      @@Dreigonix Hey, you do you, just remember: Session Zero or zero sessions, your choice.

    • @Dreigonix
      @Dreigonix 4 года назад +10

      Yep.

    • @chrisradek6693
      @chrisradek6693 4 года назад +20

      Absolutely. Again, if you have a DM and a party who are into the same things then all is great, but one of the big conversations you should have at a Session 0 is what subjects the players are uncomfortable with.

    • @ayceinquisitor190
      @ayceinquisitor190 4 года назад +10

      My friends have made me roll for attractiveness, penis sizes and boob sizes, but it was a completely consensual affair that everyone at the table was comfortable with since these are long-time friends. If they weren't, I probably wouldn't be ok with it lmao
      And it doesn't even really matter if there's a group of interested players because futanari is trans fetishistic garbage and the same shit can be done w/o being totally nasty and hyper-sexual (Ymir from Norse mythology, the primary creator of the world(s) is said to be a "hermaphrodite" (outdated term for an intersex condition) and the motherfucker had their body cut up to do it soooo )

  • @ilovekame
    @ilovekame 4 года назад +904

    Players: “Can you talk about the world our characters are in?”
    The DM: *”So you have chosen-death.”*

  • @natakug1
    @natakug1 5 лет назад +2569

    As a perma-DM....this guy bothers me. I ain't gonna say you can't have a game featuring adult content...and I aint gonna say you can't have a game featuring...pornographic content, however this content was forced upon the players without consent.
    If you want to feature an adult game like this, you have to discuss with your players first about if they would be interested in a game featuring excessively pornographic themes. and if you dont know your player base and simply doing a pick up group. Keep it PG-13, read the room, and age it up as needed.

    • @elderliddle2733
      @elderliddle2733 5 лет назад +133

      As a fellow DM I agree completely. You can totally have adult themes in a campaign. I’m running a kings court campaign and I try very hard to keep it PG. I have poison that makes the target vomit blood, but I got the ok to do that beforehand. Also, one of my players is practically begging me to add an affair somewhere. Haven’t got the ok from the others yet, so I didn’t. Sure the game is supposed to be the DM’s fantasy, but not THAT fantasy. Ask before you do anything that makes your players morally uncomfortable, activates a phobia, or triggers ptsd.

    • @rikubro26
      @rikubro26 5 лет назад +71

      Yea honestly it is ok to use adult/dark themes. But this guy clearly said nothing and just expected his players to be ok with it because they were adults. This is not ok, from both a player and DM perspective. Also when doing that thing with the goblins honestly less details are good. Keeps everything vague but threatening.

    • @jacquilyntackett4415
      @jacquilyntackett4415 5 лет назад +45

      I agree, there was no consent whatsoever and the DM didn't even listen to what the players were telling him about their characters. This felt like the DM's spank dream playing out against the players' wishes.

    • @shiny_owl9171
      @shiny_owl9171 5 лет назад +33

      Honestly Yes. I'm currently DMing my first long term campaign and in one of the first sessions my players each picked up somebody in a bar and after a little flirting they took them home and we faded to black because i was not comfortable going further than that. But these were close friends who i was in general comfortable with and they were the one who instigated the situation

    • @VenseyNess
      @VenseyNess 5 лет назад +21

      I agree entirely.
      As a DM, it's importaint to know where lines are with both players and yourself. What can you push without making people uncomfortable?
      Sometimes, after getting people invested, and making a shared vision of the dos and don'ts of your world, it can be good to try and push it a little, for the sake of making a compelling story. But never this much, never out if the gate, and never EVER after you get the slightest hint that you're making your players uncomfortable to be there.

  • @Funny-kk8rk
    @Funny-kk8rk 5 лет назад +1975

    DM: *makes sexualized campaign*
    Literally everyone that's not also a neckbeard: ight imma head out

    • @youcantbeatk7006
      @youcantbeatk7006 5 лет назад +29

      But they didn't.

    • @islandcreepergameztf2andot771
      @islandcreepergameztf2andot771 4 года назад +45

      even as a neckbeard myself i found that obnoxiously irritating to have DM's do that to new players, mostly the reason why D&D has a bad name in certain places.

    • @Exile_Sky
      @Exile_Sky 4 года назад +14

      ~stares at a past feminist hyper hipster dm he's had that made everything sexual.~
      Okay, I believe you.

    • @joelsasmad
      @joelsasmad 4 года назад +7

      I mean there's nothing inherently wrong about a fetishized game if everyone gives consent and knows what they are getting into but that really is probably the top thing that will make groups leave immediately if you spring it on them

  • @kalajel
    @kalajel 5 лет назад +2228

    "I'm going to the weapon smith. I need to buy a new sword."
    "You enter the smithy. The blacksmith stands there naked, sweat glistening on his firm, toned, muscular body. You then catch a glimpse of his huge, pulsating, throbbing..."
    "This better be his goddamn hammer..."

    • @epicgamer-ny4fj
      @epicgamer-ny4fj 5 лет назад +231

      "It his. He hammers stuff with his pe pe."

    • @NinjaBusCow
      @NinjaBusCow 5 лет назад +8

      @@epicgamer-ny4fj Lmfao!

    • @captaintomato5433
      @captaintomato5433 5 лет назад +121

      I read hammer as hamster.
      Cue the image of a buff and angry hamster in my mind.

    • @tuffy135ify
      @tuffy135ify 5 лет назад +14

      @@epicgamer-ny4fj Captain Hammer?

    • @wheeliebin18
      @wheeliebin18 5 лет назад +5

      @Captain Tomato - Soooo Minsc and Boo then? :p

  • @nimbusnarrator
    @nimbusnarrator 5 лет назад +1084

    “Hey guys you wanna play D&-“
    “And then the world was made by female goddesses coming all over the planet.”
    “....I’m just gonna...Go....”

    • @Daredhnu
      @Daredhnu 4 года назад +17

      to be fair that's pretty much the core of literally every mythology in the world, so up to that point i was still fine with it, i would have even been fine with the goblin rape gang considering they were the enemies but i get the distinct feeling the DM was very explicit in his descriptions and not in a good way.

    • @alexv3357
      @alexv3357 4 года назад +23

      @@Daredhnu Futanaris ejaculating the world into existence is actually pretty tame compared especially to Aztec mythology, which describes basically the same thing but with gratuitous violence and mutilation

    • @commandercaptain4664
      @commandercaptain4664 4 года назад

      Will's second worst nightmare, after not getting to play D&D at all.

    • @portgasdann3389
      @portgasdann3389 4 года назад

      @@alexv3357 can you give a link as an example?

    • @NWolfsson
      @NWolfsson 4 года назад +8

      Female character's player: "A'ight, just to check, my character takes a peep at her genitals"
      DM: "You see a big, throbbing penis!"
      Player: "... Aaaand, that's supposed to be unusual, like a curse or..?"
      DM: "Nah, you just have a big ol' diek!"
      Player: "But I made that clear my character is a woman. As in, having a traditional female body."
      DM: "That's how that world is, since eons long forgotten u^u"
      Player: "Sssssssuuuuure..."

  • @MOODFR
    @MOODFR 4 года назад +277

    “You’re a horrible Dungeon Master!”
    “AH HELL NAH, there’s a man who-“ *gestures to all this*
    “THATS YOUR EXCUSE EVERY TIME”

  • @gules3971
    @gules3971 5 лет назад +1548

    "WhO wAnTs To ViSiT mY MaGiCaL rEalMs?" Seriously though, it would be nicer if GMs kept their fetishes to themselves instead of forcing them on others. Great Vid!

    • @yumri4
      @yumri4 5 лет назад +20

      For the majority of DnD games that makes sense. For some select few that should inform you behind hand and not just surprise you that it is so it is not.

    • @megasora4
      @megasora4 5 лет назад +12

      @@yumri4 i think you meant before hand, but now i have this image in my head of the dm writing on the back of your hand before character creation and you not looking at it until the red flags had begun.

    • @yumri4
      @yumri4 5 лет назад +3

      @@megasora4 yeah I see the grammar mistake now. I am sorry about that. An image of my DnD profile on my hand would be cool though most likely never possible due to how lengthy my characters back stories are it will go all the way up my arm and probably to the other one until the end of their back story.
      I think most DnD players are this into their characters even the throw away ones.

    • @azurekaberis8013
      @azurekaberis8013 5 лет назад +4

      No,he's the dungeon master,he can do whatever he wants.But,BUT OF FUCKING COURSE HE SHOULD HAVE PAID IN MIND HOW THAT WOULD AFFECT THE OTHERS.Plus,him focusing so much on the fetish rather than th players was the biggest thing that would ruin and dm's rep.

    • @tyrant-den884
      @tyrant-den884 5 лет назад +3

      Yep. Technically there is all sorts of weeeeeeeird shit going on in my campaign world. The PCs are not going to so much as hear about it though unless the Bard needs to be taught a lesson.

  • @gabewright5571
    @gabewright5571 5 лет назад +678

    He was clearly a bad DM, but he definitely broke the biggest rules right off the bat: not informing your party what your campaign might contain, especially if it's sensitive subjects or NSFW topics, and not paying attention of caring about your party's PCs. You're not DMing just to build your own story, but to build a story with your players. They're the most important storytellers at the table.

    • @marxistbatman7099
      @marxistbatman7099 5 лет назад +12

      Exactly! Most of the time i see these horrible dm stories its from them trying to tell THIER story but thats not what ttrpgs are about. Its about creating a world and letting your players tell a story of their own in the setting you create and run. I run a game in forgotten realms and am a huge fan of the novels, and some of my players were worried id try and force Drizzt Do'urden or Artemis Enteri in at every chance. But i havent cuz this is their story! If i have a oppurtunity to introduce those characters organically you betcha ima drop some refrences in there but id never force them im the campaign mo matter how much i love em. And that's normal stuff not no funitari rape goblins lol.

    • @TwistyKitty
      @TwistyKitty 4 года назад +3

      Hell, my husband's running Curse of Strahd right now with me and some of our friends. We all know each other and know our weird, messed up senses of humor, and don't take each other seriously. That didn't stop him from pulling aside one of the players, who was very pregnant, that we'd encounter some gruesome stuff regarding kids during the campaign and wanted to make sure she'd be ok with that given she was about to be a new mom.

  • @shep3128
    @shep3128 5 лет назад +265

    As a DM I'm POSITIVE that it is an unspoken rule, that this should never happen. And to keep anything overly sexual out of campaigns unless, Explicitly telling the party before hand. Even then this is a bit far.

    • @chron874
      @chron874 5 лет назад +4

      Session 0 is a thing for a reason

    • @4saken404
      @4saken404 5 лет назад +12

      This isn't D&D. It's just an excuse for someone to involve other people in their sexual fantasies without their consent.

    • @Pipkiablo
      @Pipkiablo 5 лет назад +6

      Yeah, one of my friends is apparently notorious for making borderline pornographic campaigns (I've never played, but according to our friends, his campaigns tend to cross so many lines that they're hilarious, which is the only reason anyone puts up with it), but he at least warns everyone what they're getting into and only plays with friends that he knows really well anyway, not random strangers that he just met.

    • @funnyblog100
      @funnyblog100 5 лет назад +1

      Or unless you have a bard in the party in which case expect things to get sexual.

    • @shep3128
      @shep3128 5 лет назад +1

      @@funnyblog100 yeah, Bards are always the exception. But even then they USUALLY dont take it to far.

  • @StateBlaze1989
    @StateBlaze1989 5 лет назад +334

    "The DM explains how the elven goddesses were futanari.."
    Oh man, this is gonna be good!

    • @emiledlund9559
      @emiledlund9559 5 лет назад +9

      StateBlaze1989 If nothing else it was unique

    • @MalekitGJ
      @MalekitGJ 4 года назад +1

      @@emiledlund9559 not really, since RAW says only dick-shelves are the only ones who can become high prietess

  • @IGSA101
    @IGSA101 4 года назад +212

    This Dm broke the one rule of Erp, everyone has to be in on it or it's just creepy.

    • @maximumforce8275
      @maximumforce8275 4 года назад +6

      Ah I see I'm not the only one in this comment section who knows the ways of the erp.

    • @randomrants148
      @randomrants148 3 года назад +4

      I actually would keep playing I don't have a Futa fetish I find them creepy but I want to see how things get even worst and I would be the one is only laughing playing the game.

  • @adiscerningdunmer9311
    @adiscerningdunmer9311 5 лет назад +1614

    "Females. Naked, with goblins that have big, throbbing co--"
    Ah, so he watched Goblin Slayer, I see.

    • @tut28Angel
      @tut28Angel 5 лет назад +19

      I thought that 2.

    • @seelcudoom1
      @seelcudoom1 4 года назад +137

      and apparently dident get that the rape scenes are supposed to be horrifying not arousing

    • @MopedOfJustice
      @MopedOfJustice 4 года назад +60

      @@seelcudoom1 Tell that to the director of the anime . . .

    • @gazelle_diamond9768
      @gazelle_diamond9768 4 года назад +56

      @@MopedOfJustice Don't tell me you found those scenes in the anime arousing.

    • @MopedOfJustice
      @MopedOfJustice 4 года назад +57

      @@gazelle_diamond9768 I was appalled by them, but a large part of that being appalled was that it's so clearly shot to be a fucking soft porn.

  • @YourPalKindred
    @YourPalKindred 5 лет назад +718

    I'll never understand how people can run games like this

    • @travisborst2120
      @travisborst2120 5 лет назад +107

      With one hand under the table...

    • @kendrickrochelanzot2053
      @kendrickrochelanzot2053 5 лет назад +18

      @@travisborst2120 YYYIIIIIAAAAAHHHH

    • @IIIGioGioStarIII
      @IIIGioGioStarIII 5 лет назад +32

      My old group would run games like this. But we would do a game like that once or twice a month. And they were ment to be joke games. Our DM would let us know a day or so before the actual game so that way we could either join or not.

    • @datalysjr3339
      @datalysjr3339 5 лет назад +4

      travis borst
      Ara ara

    • @erickchristensen746
      @erickchristensen746 5 лет назад +30

      Gio Gio Star Yeah it’s fun and or funny when everyone is in on it. But to go in as a group expecting one thing and getting...something else, is a pretty odd and often bad experience to the players.

  • @OrangeyChocolate
    @OrangeyChocolate 5 лет назад +722

    Sounds like that GM needed to spend less time on DeviantArt.

    • @rickhudson7929
      @rickhudson7929 5 лет назад +1

      ha ha ha! so true!

    • @ShitpostingJoJo
      @ShitpostingJoJo 5 лет назад +8

      or maybe stay in there for the rest of his life

    • @bubblepops8764
      @bubblepops8764 5 лет назад

      And n.hentai I mean have you seen the tags on that site

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +25

      4chan rather. That college group was full of people who frequented it. There was 1 in specific that wouldn't stop talking about it and their character was..... a whole other story.

    • @OrangeyChocolate
      @OrangeyChocolate 5 лет назад +4

      @@brachyzoid
      Oof, I shudder to think what the deal was with that...

  • @nonchip
    @nonchip 5 лет назад +229

    sooooo tl;dr: GM is unable to imagine any thing or even abstract concept without picturing a giant throbbing....?

    • @JacksonOwex
      @JacksonOwex 4 года назад +11

      This needs to be higher so people don't have to witness the horror. If you want to help out the RUclipsr you can always mute the video and come back!!!

  • @LazyVideosGAME
    @LazyVideosGAME 5 лет назад +464

    No one:
    This DM:
    "I do some gesticulation
    to explain the situation:
    The world was created
    by Futanari Ejaculation."

    • @angerblob9151
      @angerblob9151 4 года назад +12

      I should not be laughing but I can not stop laughing.

  • @nexelray3207
    @nexelray3207 5 лет назад +478

    God, if i had given him a chance after hearing the futa goddess that came on earth, then i would’ve walked away after hearing the Goblin Slayer nsfw part.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +19

      We ignored red flags because we just wanted to play. How wrong we were

    • @4saken404
      @4saken404 5 лет назад +7

      Even without the sexual content all the "stuff just happens" content is pretty much a deal-breaker. I have had dreams more coherent than that. And Brachyzoid said (in another thread) it got even worse. "One time the forced a character via teleport with giant hand and just moved the character where he wanted them to be even though it made no sense."

  • @smiith5
    @smiith5 5 лет назад +364

    I was worried for your halfling, ngl.

    • @kobaltblueknight
      @kobaltblueknight 5 лет назад +26

      Yea, if that campaign had continued; bad things would likely happen to her

    • @mihaiioc.3809
      @mihaiioc.3809 4 года назад +16

      @@kobaltblueknight "your charracter stares in fear at theyr long, pulsating..."

    • @Saint_Francis23
      @Saint_Francis23 4 года назад +6

      @@mihaiioc.3809 THROBBING *inhales* CCCCCCCCCCCCCC-OOOOOOOOCKKKKKHHHHHHHH

    • @bedge7782
      @bedge7782 4 года назад +6

      @@Saint_Francis23 -atrice

    • @Saint_Francis23
      @Saint_Francis23 4 года назад +3

      @@bedge7782 which is also a futanari

  • @graywolf2241
    @graywolf2241 5 лет назад +464

    The goblins apparently have a hyena hierarchy

  • @fryingpanda9103
    @fryingpanda9103 5 лет назад +533

    I'm a God awful dm
    This made me feel better

  • @AmiralXII
    @AmiralXII 5 лет назад +104

    I first thought "Oh this is still a believable genesis story, I mean just look at Greek mythology or Hinduism's third gender." But then I was like " Oh boy he really likes c*cks doesn't he." Not that there's anything wrong with that... When players know what they signed for haha

  • @eh_o_kiq
    @eh_o_kiq 5 лет назад +312

    me reading the title of the video : oh "NSFW" you say, its just an RPG campaign, nothing bad can happen ... right ?
    me watching the video : existence is pure and only pain ...

  • @dawnwest857
    @dawnwest857 5 лет назад +580

    "A halfling raised by dwarves" - already adored her. 😂

    • @herozilla5458
      @herozilla5458 5 лет назад +2

      Same

    • @WorldWalker128
      @WorldWalker128 5 лет назад +8

      Halfling should fit right in. No pun intended.

    • @thecharmer5981
      @thecharmer5981 4 года назад +4

      I played a halfling raised by dwarves once. He was a loud, racist, drunk mercenary who wasn’t very polite or particularly charming

  • @christophercotto4212
    @christophercotto4212 5 лет назад +588

    Me after that encounter of how the world was created.
    "I am sickened, but curious."

    • @goggles8691
      @goggles8691 5 лет назад +9

      What's even the point of the "I'm sickened" we all equally want to hear about it

    • @waffle911
      @waffle911 5 лет назад +9

      I was just "WHELP I'm already in too deep, might as well see this one through."

    • @Hyperversum3
      @Hyperversum3 5 лет назад +8

      Too be fair, there are several real-life myths based on the world or at least some parts of it being something like that.
      Check Egyptian creation myth, or Aphrodyte being born from the cut-off dick of Chrono.
      This doesn't justify an overly sexualized world mind It, but I wouldn't watch someone using sexuality as part of the myths as that's something that maybe is just a reference to those myths.

    • @TheCoolerDrilis
      @TheCoolerDrilis 5 лет назад +4

      Yeah. I think the worst part is that that wouldn't be out of place in real-world mythology.

    • @krisssmith477
      @krisssmith477 5 лет назад

      @@Hyperversum3 I thought the myth of Aphrodite had her being born from Kronos's blood being spilt and mixing with sea foam?

  • @elation00
    @elation00 5 лет назад +107

    a group of women being attacked by goblins, i read enough manga to know where this is going
    edit: have you guy seen fendel tales? hoo boy

    • @pantheman2842
      @pantheman2842 4 года назад +6

      Especially Goblin Slayer?

    • @elation00
      @elation00 4 года назад +4

      @@pantheman2842 oh yeah

    • @fero5145
      @fero5145 4 года назад

      MUHAHAHAHAHA

    • @walnut_raisin2621
      @walnut_raisin2621 4 года назад

      Do you mean doujinshi?

    • @elation00
      @elation00 4 года назад +1

      @@walnut_raisin2621 no, that was a manga

  • @dothsley4066
    @dothsley4066 5 лет назад +136

    He's narrating as though he's talking to a therapist... And I don't blame him.
    This was... Some story.
    Also, was his GM George RR Martin??

    • @EvilSandwich
      @EvilSandwich 4 года назад +7

      Not enough gratuitous and elaborate descriptions of food to be George RR Martin.

  • @kattriella1331
    @kattriella1331 5 лет назад +896

    ". . . and that became the continents."
    Don't you mean the "cumtinents"?
    I'm so sorry, I'll see myself out.

  • @rob98000
    @rob98000 5 лет назад +285

    Well that explains how the world CAME into existence

    • @green149
      @green149 5 лет назад +18

      One job ...one job and you busted it😂

    • @21_315
      @21_315 4 года назад +6

      @@green149 "busted"

    • @green149
      @green149 4 года назад +3

      @@21_315 yeah, busted. I'm sure you get the pun?

    • @pandagamer-hg5be
      @pandagamer-hg5be 4 года назад +4

      nut that good of a joke

    • @princeboo3188
      @princeboo3188 4 года назад

      Ayy

  • @xrybl45tx12
    @xrybl45tx12 5 лет назад +104

    “The elven godess’s were futanari’s”
    Me:”oh no”

  • @trashbandityt
    @trashbandityt 5 лет назад +83

    I was having doubts of my DMing skills and felt severely inferior... this makes me feel better about myself.

    • @onelife3380
      @onelife3380 4 года назад

      Same.

    • @TheDanielbarboza
      @TheDanielbarboza 4 года назад +1

      I'm feeling really good about myself as a Dm after this video. :)

  • @patchwilliamson
    @patchwilliamson 5 лет назад +292

    Great, now i have to make a fanatical cult that believes the world was created by futa semen in my world (dont worry, that is most certainly not the case, but that doesnt mean those NPCs wont believe it)

    • @Konpekikaminari
      @Konpekikaminari 5 лет назад +8

      Saying you _have_ to make it means this is acceptable as a joke in your table
      Right?

    • @patchwilliamson
      @patchwilliamson 5 лет назад +16

      @@Konpekikaminari i dont see why it wouldnt be considering the group (thinking about calling it the Society of the Seed) will be the equivalent to flat earthers in our world

    • @Konpekikaminari
      @Konpekikaminari 5 лет назад +7

      @@patchwilliamson well in the video it did not feel like one, so I'm just hoping I found someone who's doing weird, crazy stuff right
      Also, "society of the Seed" That...
      That's good, I like your style

    • @patchwilliamson
      @patchwilliamson 5 лет назад +2

      @@Konpekikaminari oh, no, i meant thats how they'll be in my world. Also, thank you.

    • @4saken404
      @4saken404 5 лет назад +9

      Seems like you could also take advantage of the "basement dweller" trope. Because the D&D equivalent of a basement is a dungeon. So it only makes sense that this cult is in a dungeon below the cult leader's mom's house. XD

  • @afoolishmortal5265
    @afoolishmortal5265 5 лет назад +124

    6:12 "it can get any worse than that"
    me: why do i hear boss music

    • @unluckyfish3197
      @unluckyfish3197 5 лет назад +3

      A boss with a second throbbing health bar.

  • @thewingeddeer9946
    @thewingeddeer9946 5 лет назад +190

    Me: I wonder what this is gonna be about
    Me, two minutes in: *Feels grandma sighing in disappointment from the afterlife* Me too Grandma, me too.

  • @thegreypanther4626
    @thegreypanther4626 4 года назад +45

    He must’ve watched a truly staggering amount of hentai, thinking it would be okay to feature that in his world-building.

    • @TheGladGolem
      @TheGladGolem 4 года назад +3

      There is precedent for this kind of DMing. The average of hentai required is approximately 3.8 Terawanks.

    • @Manglet762
      @Manglet762 4 года назад +1

      I don't think it's even that, I feel what a person knows to not bring up in social situations can be evened out by just simply TALKING TO PEOPLE, specifically in real life and not the internet. How little social interaction does this guy have to think this is ok? It's likely almost none.

    • @StudlyFudd13
      @StudlyFudd13 3 года назад +2

      @@Manglet762 More than likely he is used to hanging out with other people online who think like he does. So he lives in this echo chamber, where this thought and action is reinforced to him. So then it makes these actions seem even more okay to him, therefore these sorts of things happen. Yes you can have a friend group that is into these sorts of things, but it's not healthy to only have that perspective in life. Or else this sort of shit goes down.

  • @swirlershark-dragon8393
    @swirlershark-dragon8393 5 лет назад +56

    The guy with his head back staring at the ceiling is totally me lol

  • @koosh138
    @koosh138 5 лет назад +106

    I feel that dudes like this are why there's too much creepy fan art on the internet.

    • @mihaiioc.3809
      @mihaiioc.3809 4 года назад +19

      the problem is not what he's into (just because there can be so much worse and he doesn't directly hurt anybody)
      the problem is that he openly expresses it and forces others to aknowledge it at any given moment

  • @letrokid1121
    @letrokid1121 5 лет назад +91

    Me, before watching this video: "Oh, cool. A DnD video. With... an NSFW warning... Can it be that bad?"
    Me, in the second third of the video: "..." "Why am I here?"
    Me, hearing about the *Female Goblins*: "... Kill me ..."

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +2

      Thank you for joining in my suffering

  • @LB-yg2br
    @LB-yg2br 5 лет назад +217

    I love that the DM used the word futanari, clearly learned from watching Japanese hentai, instead of the word hermaphrodite
    ....goes to show where the DM's mind was at.

    • @leethemonstrous
      @leethemonstrous 5 лет назад +9

      L B
      Chances are that the DM used that word himself, probably exclusively judging by the sounds of it.

    • @NathanTAK
      @NathanTAK 5 лет назад +9

      Maybe it was from AMERICAN hentai, like a goddamn PATRIOT

    • @OGNoNameNobody
      @OGNoNameNobody 5 лет назад +2

      ....wow. U B rite.
      The terminology WAS a big RED flag here.

    • @youcantbeatk7006
      @youcantbeatk7006 5 лет назад +1

      @@Trojianmaru Weeb also gay.

    • @willowarkan2263
      @willowarkan2263 5 лет назад

      @@youcantbeatk7006 not sure that is how that works. Somehow I don't see gay guys, as in not bi or anywhere close to bi, going for women but also with a dick. I feel the otherwise completely female body might be a turn off. Though I am hardly an expert on this, except i wouldn't be all that attracted to a stereotypical man, but with breasts or, if we are going with genitals, a vagina hiding under his scrotum.

  • @shrekatemyonions
    @shrekatemyonions 5 лет назад +17

    “The barbarian smashed”
    Very poor choice of words

  • @chrisradek6693
    @chrisradek6693 4 года назад +15

    This sounds like the kind of DM who would consider running a FATAL game.

  • @tarballt2739
    @tarballt2739 5 лет назад +237

    noone:
    dm: *l o n g p u l s a t i n g t h r o b b i n g p e -*

    • @cleoking6312
      @cleoking6312 4 года назад +2

      Not even, he used mem-OUghh, ehem me-couoouugghh, ouuuuggg

  • @TheArtsyEldar
    @TheArtsyEldar 5 лет назад +75

    Didn't think I'd hear the words "r*pe goblins" casually leave someone's vocal chords.

    • @lapidations
      @lapidations 5 лет назад +2

      you're right, it's the kind of thing we would only expect to read, not hear.

    • @TheChefEgg
      @TheChefEgg 5 лет назад

      I have actually, ones

    • @MogofWar
      @MogofWar 5 лет назад

      2019 ruined so many of us.

    • @MogofWar
      @MogofWar 5 лет назад +2

      What's fucked up is while reading the word "r*pe" my semantic register read "rope" while my inner voice narrator simultaneously said "rape." So I've got different mental faculties not agreeing with each other.

  • @seirbells9546
    @seirbells9546 5 лет назад +76

    Erotic D&D is nice, when everyone knows what they are going in, otherwise... just, no, big nono

    • @patrickdees5256
      @patrickdees5256 5 лет назад +15

      And it's not the fact it's erotic, it just felt as though he was shoving his fetish down their throats.

    • @nathanielranney9163
      @nathanielranney9163 5 лет назад +4

      @@patrickdees5256 ... are we not doing 'phrasing' anymore?

    • @patrickdees5256
      @patrickdees5256 5 лет назад +1

      @@nathanielranney9163 humm. Maybe.

  • @Diablofan100
    @Diablofan100 5 лет назад +21

    I knew where this was going from the thumbnail alone and was prepared for magical pissforests, but good gods above and below, nothing could prepare me for this.

  • @theholynut8598
    @theholynut8598 4 года назад +21

    "futanari"
    Me: *IGHT, IM GONNA HEAD OUT*

  • @stevozegreat1669
    @stevozegreat1669 5 лет назад +134

    2:29 certainly not the weirdest creation myth I've hear but it's up there

  • @JoseGabrielMoraisdaSilva
    @JoseGabrielMoraisdaSilva 5 лет назад +53

    Me: I guess this story line of mine is bizarre.
    Me after this video: nevermind

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +5

      There is always someone worse than us somewhere.

  • @colinchildress1251
    @colinchildress1251 5 лет назад +322

    This isn't what the PHB mean't by traps.

    • @sovest555
      @sovest555 5 лет назад +5

      I mean Traps are technically in the DMG, but even so... XD

    • @dementedgamer8123
      @dementedgamer8123 5 лет назад +3

      Psychic damage

    • @daltonkellebrew2236
      @daltonkellebrew2236 5 лет назад

      @@sovest555 How. So. In. This. Context?!?!?!

    • @sovest555
      @sovest555 5 лет назад

      @@daltonkellebrew2236 Never underestimate the versatility of phalluses. ;p

    • @daltonkellebrew2236
      @daltonkellebrew2236 5 лет назад

      @@sovest555 Im even further confused

  • @DiceWarwick
    @DiceWarwick 5 лет назад +26

    and once more, a story were someone lets their fetish ruin everyone's fun... I call these people the fetishist of a fandom, not a big problem, as hopefully everyone is an adult that is dealing with them, and that they keep it behind close doors, with people who are okay with it. Here, we have a fetishist who let their freak flag fly with strangers, and in a setting were it was not asked for, or given the okay for.
    As for the world creation myth, not as bothered, as I've heard worse from actual religions. (Japan being the worst as far as I can remember) though going into detail on it is a huge red flag, as just saying "The seeded life into the world" would have been enough.

    • @octagon7732
      @octagon7732 4 года назад

      what happened in the japanese version?

    • @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth
      @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth 4 года назад

      DiceWarwick | Nah dude, you want a _really_ crazy creation myth? There was this one Inuit tribe and well... uh... hm. I don't actually want to talk about it. Look it up yourself if you wanna.

  • @SentientBeefStew
    @SentientBeefStew 5 лет назад +16

    And I thought my friend’s drunk necromancer waking in a ditch with 2 dark elves and new cult symbol was crazy, but this takes the cake!

  • @danielramsey6141
    @danielramsey6141 5 лет назад +150

    Holy Hell that was just...strange. Not the giant Female Goblins, but the Penis/Futa obsession that this guy has went over and above my expectations. He probably watched too much goblin Slayer or Bible Black when it came out.
    It's always a bad sign when Dms and Players bring stuff into a game that's literally inappropriate. LEAVE THAT SHIT AT HOME!

    • @ivibewitharocketlauncher2250
      @ivibewitharocketlauncher2250 5 лет назад +3

      You can havr that atuff if the entire party csn agree with it but you know it also doesnt need to be like that much

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +3

      Even at the very least warn your players before chaining them to a game

    • @goggles8691
      @goggles8691 5 лет назад

      @@mcarlinod yeah, I haven't watched it but here I am, wanting to know about the futa goblins

    • @cheriquebutterfly
      @cheriquebutterfly 5 лет назад +1

      That was i also though .o. i even watch anime a long time ago finish and never return to thats how
      but i never hear of Futa created the planted ...that ..that just weird??! .. .~.; (im just now very confused) In this case the flatearth people shound less weird and more believeble

    • @mcarlinod
      @mcarlinod 5 лет назад +2

      @@goggles8691 Futa goblinas would not have any sense, I mean, you can not have descendants if both sexes of your species have only male reproductive organs.
      So no there are not futa goblins in GS, there are only male goblins.
      And how they reproduce...? I don't think you want to know it.

  • @delphynenull2136
    @delphynenull2136 5 лет назад +31

    The epitome of “Dare you enter my magical realm?”
    That’s a major gm taboo, I’d have actually slapped him.

  • @Plaugue1122
    @Plaugue1122 5 лет назад +77

    I'd have told him no after that intro and dm myself. Gods that is ugh.

  • @EvilSandwich
    @EvilSandwich 4 года назад +9

    As a long time Pathfinder GM, I feel like Pathfinder isn't the game system of choice for this particular DM.
    Might I suggest FATAL? That way, he can be with his own kind and stay the hell away from Pathfinder.

  • @MilesTailsProwerfan9
    @MilesTailsProwerfan9 4 года назад +37

    After hearing jizz continents, I would have packed up my stuff and leave without a word.
    Sounded like he wanted a CoC type of game.

    • @Vampireangel1011
      @Vampireangel1011 4 года назад +4

      same lol l I would of packed up my Dice and my character sheets and said "peace, loser" lol like damn. it's not a bad thing to have some Nsfw or gruesome content in your game, but fuck at least inform everyone and not reveal that shit to randos lol

    • @octagon7732
      @octagon7732 4 года назад +7

      did somebody say... corruption of champions?

    • @NeroMattsss
      @NeroMattsss 4 года назад

      Wym coc?

    • @nicobuffing9756
      @nicobuffing9756 4 года назад +1

      Call of Cthulu? Its not quite as bad really ;s

    • @EvilSandwich
      @EvilSandwich 4 года назад +5

      That moment where I'm not sure if that abbreviation is meant for Corruption of Champions or Call of Cthulhu.
      Because one of these abbreviations is 100% appropriate and the other one makes absolutely zero sense in context.

  • @jesternario
    @jesternario 5 лет назад +52

    I had to rewind because I sort of tuned out after I heard the word “futanari.”

  • @kidyomu89
    @kidyomu89 5 лет назад +40

    Earth: Oh boy, wish there was like... Life, or land, or something... Kinda boring, and desolate and stuff...
    Futa Goddesses:
    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )
    💪🎽🤳
    👢🍆👢

  • @deltadrag00n19
    @deltadrag00n19 5 лет назад +127

    sounds like the dm wanted to have a sexventure ;p

    • @deltadrag00n19
      @deltadrag00n19 5 лет назад +8

      i think it was sort of funny where he said the world was not more then elven gods circle jerk

    • @tonydanatop4912
      @tonydanatop4912 5 лет назад +7

      I got no problems with that kinda shet usually but you gotta give people warnings before center the whole campaighn around your kinks

    • @veng3r663
      @veng3r663 5 лет назад +2

      I've never encountered THAT word before. I find it both somewhat puzzling & intriguing... :/

    • @xanderxalamander9492
      @xanderxalamander9492 5 лет назад +4

      If everyone in the group is fine with that, then it is ok.
      But this guy just let his extreme kinks out on people that just wanted to play DnD.

    • @tonydanatop4912
      @tonydanatop4912 5 лет назад +3

      @@xanderxalamander9492
      Exactly he shoulda told people to break out the chain mail bikini before hand or else it's just shocking ya know
      Same goes for any odd genre campaighn really

  • @JadeDRail
    @JadeDRail 4 года назад +2

    I'm asexual and sex-repulsed and this is extremely uncomfortable for me to watch...and yet....I'm still watching. T-T

  • @commandervulkan
    @commandervulkan 5 лет назад +28

    Moment I heard Goblins I knew exactly where it was going.

    • @StudlyFudd13
      @StudlyFudd13 3 года назад

      Yeah the dude has watched/read too much Goblin slayer clearly.

  • @aronhromalic3785
    @aronhromalic3785 5 лет назад +114

    I mean that is how the egyptians thought that the river nile was created

    • @TheUnoriginalDrCorgi
      @TheUnoriginalDrCorgi 5 лет назад +5

      Aron hromalic no jerry, they didn’t

    • @aidanmills6136
      @aidanmills6136 5 лет назад +13

      No, they thought the Nile was the sweat of a giant crocodile God.

    • @Xargas
      @Xargas 5 лет назад +5

      In Norse mythology they thought the ocean was the blood of the slain giant Ymir.

    • @aronhromalic3785
      @aronhromalic3785 5 лет назад +1

      @@aidanmills6136 I thought that it was made when a goddes in a form of a bird blew a god and his semen became the nile, ancient egypt is old so it probably have many contradicting myths. But I'll believe you if you promise

    • @aidanmills6136
      @aidanmills6136 5 лет назад +1

      @@aronhromalic3785 yeah, go ahead and look up sobek.

  • @Joemantler
    @Joemantler 5 лет назад +38

    Sounds like a lot of today's entertainment, where "adult" translates into "adolescent, but old enough to include this kind of thing."

    • @Joemantler
      @Joemantler 5 лет назад +1

      By the way, I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +2

      It becomes more childish the more adult they try to be

  • @ethanfordford6621
    @ethanfordford6621 5 лет назад +31

    Honestly the start isn’t the worst origin story of the “world” but it is a contender.

  • @Morphia
    @Morphia 5 лет назад

    Thank you for sharing this story. It's important to bring these cases to light and open the discussion on such cases. Plus the animation was adorable. You really treated the situation with a measure of respect that the DM in question didn't necessarily deserve.

  • @uberpye
    @uberpye 4 года назад +3

    Not just a "Welcome to my Magical Realm" DM, but a RAILROADING "Welcome to my Magical Realm" DM.

  • @lourier3
    @lourier3 5 лет назад +29

    That creation story seems like an actual civilisation could have written this myth. Why is it so bad?
    Edit: But the rest........

    • @PKEin
      @PKEin 5 лет назад +5

      That’s true, many civilisations have that kind of shit in their mythology
      BUT
      ITS NOT THE WHOLE FUCKING STORY?

    • @gateship2
      @gateship2 4 года назад +11

      Well considering in Greek Mythology Aphrodite was born from the severed penis of Uranus falling into the sea, yeah, that creation myth didn’t really weird me out too much.
      The rapey goblins... well goblins be goblins...
      The female goblins with penises are where I went “wat?”

    • @polasamierwahsh421
      @polasamierwahsh421 4 года назад

      @@PKEin exactly

  • @cosmicfails2053
    @cosmicfails2053 5 лет назад +133

    Goblin Slayer: *Kills the DM* no more. Never again. No more.

    • @ultrimarines9198
      @ultrimarines9198 5 лет назад +4

      Cosmic Fails With all those goblins, I am sure he would do that.

    • @valsipstones6871
      @valsipstones6871 4 года назад +2

      What is goblin slayer?

    • @TheAlmightyDoge
      @TheAlmightyDoge 4 года назад +4

      @@valsipstones6871 Goblin Slayer is an anime featuring a fantasy world in which the main protagonist has a burning hatred of goblins who are portrayed as savage creatures of base desire who raid villages, kill the inhabitants, steal supplies and any trinkets they find appealing, and rape women and girls and drag them back to their caves where they basically rape them to death and then eat them. Most adventurers in this fantasy world view goblin hunting as a job for weaklings that offers no glory. The protagonist who is known among his people as "The Goblin Slayer" forgoes grander prey and hunts goblins to the exclusion of all other threats, both in defense of the common person who is more frequently threatened by goblins than any other monsters, and also to satisfy his desire for vengeance because his village was slaughtered by goblins and his mother was taken by them.

    • @rommdan2716
      @rommdan2716 4 года назад +1

      @@TheAlmightyDoge Sounds Edgy as Fuck

    • @Manglet762
      @Manglet762 4 года назад

      @ThealmightyDoge
      I haven't watched Goblin Slayer, but I have ueard people talk about the infamous rape scene, about how it's just there for shock value and such. Is it so bad that it's inconsistent with the rest of show in Tone like I assume it is, or is it just exaggerated?

  • @I-VisiBomb-I
    @I-VisiBomb-I 5 лет назад +23

    that dm needs to do something about his obsession
    like go to a therapist or something....

    • @mihaiioc.3809
      @mihaiioc.3809 4 года назад +2

      i'd recomend touching Kira's doorknob

  • @bainbonic
    @bainbonic 4 года назад +1

    "You hear a scream as a group of women are being attacked."
    Me, knowing exactly what type of DM this is: "Aight Imma head out."

  • @WitherRakdos
    @WitherRakdos 5 лет назад +16

    Everyday we stray further from god.

    • @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth
      @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth 4 года назад

      There are actual creation myths about gods that are worse than this, though.

    • @mariamgomaa1242
      @mariamgomaa1242 4 года назад

      That’s a perfect explanation of what happened

    • @WitherRakdos
      @WitherRakdos 4 года назад

      @@PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth Yup. For example, in the bible, God tells an angel to go tell a slave to go back to his master because God says so

  • @rickhudson7929
    @rickhudson7929 5 лет назад +119

    If there's one thing worse than a player bringing their personality / social disorders to a game, it's a DM who does that :-)

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +1

      now imagine a TTRPG club with quite a couple of those

    • @chron874
      @chron874 5 лет назад +1

      @@brachyzoid They would have fun, no idea why that would be a bad thing.

  • @Onsvaltti
    @Onsvaltti 5 лет назад +142

    "elven godnesses"
    Ok, sounds a bit like zelda.
    "With futanari"
    Wait what 😆 omg. Cringe.

    • @kendrickrochelanzot2053
      @kendrickrochelanzot2053 5 лет назад +3

      I thought the same

    • @Konpekikaminari
      @Konpekikaminari 5 лет назад +7

      That's not cringe my friend
      That is a couple levels _above_ cringe

    • @SolstaceWinters
      @SolstaceWinters 5 лет назад +5

      Ah yes, I remember when Din, Farore, and Nayru all had a massive circle jerk over Hyrule. It's right there, in the Hyrule Historia. Surprised no one talks about that. :P

    • @Onsvaltti
      @Onsvaltti 5 лет назад

      Well it IS a littlebit touchy subject

    • @goggles8691
      @goggles8691 5 лет назад

      @@SolstaceWinters so does Zelda have a massive dong

  • @themadhacker9376
    @themadhacker9376 5 лет назад +40

    im pretty sure that the amount of alcohol that i would have to drink to forget this...might also kill me

    • @themadhacker9376
      @themadhacker9376 5 лет назад +4

      dungeons and dongs

    • @rhyzvanic3660
      @rhyzvanic3660 5 лет назад +2

      Well, you'd still forget it happened!

    • @InviWasTaken
      @InviWasTaken 5 лет назад +1

      @ZombieCee Nah
      Dungeons and Dongons
      Because nothing is more terrifying than a dick that breathes fire

    • @kobaltblueknight
      @kobaltblueknight 5 лет назад +2

      @@InviWasTaken You should get that looked at

    • @yellowpig1026
      @yellowpig1026 5 лет назад

      Dungeons and bad dragons

  • @TheOpenmindStudio
    @TheOpenmindStudio 4 года назад +2

    The moment the Dwarf parents popped up, and I saw the bow with no context, I laughed out loud and gave your video a like.

  • @TheLuckyKira
    @TheLuckyKira 5 лет назад

    I hope you talk about more DnD stories, because honestly I saw this and was like "hell yeah, more stories", and came and hoped for more! You have a fun way of telling a story, and don't worry about your art either : ) I say do what makes you comfortable, or is easiest, or makes you pleased with the result.

  • @andersasblom6452
    @andersasblom6452 5 лет назад +37

    Well, it's not the weirdest world creation myth I have heard of.
    But the rest was pretty bad. Some people should just not be DMs.

  • @lapidations
    @lapidations 5 лет назад +26

    This could totally work if the DM was an actual friend and the whole group was doing it just for the laughs.

    • @scottydu81
      @scottydu81 4 года назад

      I'd play along. For a session.

  • @linlupin
    @linlupin 5 лет назад +18

    I would've been an ass to this man tbh, get on his case whenever he tries turning it into a sexventure without consent. Theres a time and place for that and it ain't with newbies wanting an *actual* adventure.

  • @piranha4362
    @piranha4362 4 года назад +6

    and i thought i was a bad dm for not voice acting enough of my npcs.

    • @thehatterking728
      @thehatterking728 4 года назад

      Same, im terrible at voice acting and just say it commonly...

  • @therealsugarbitzskelly9780
    @therealsugarbitzskelly9780 5 лет назад +2

    Wow. Now I know there's a campaign that's both worse and more sexual than the Valentine's Day campaign I mistakenly joined

  • @samuelvernon2673
    @samuelvernon2673 5 лет назад +29

    "It can't get worse"
    YOU FOOL!

  • @TalkingAboutGames
    @TalkingAboutGames 5 лет назад +35

    That campaign setting sounds like a parody of the Heroines of the First Age Holdfast setting, with a hint of Goblin Slayer (Goblin Slayer is actually awesome though); it also sounds like that "game master" has some obsession with male genitalia.
    However, I do recommend Heroines of the First Age Holdfast; in that setting, you also have creator goddesses, but they don't create the world like that at all, they basically magic it into existence.

    • @brachyzoid
      @brachyzoid  5 лет назад +3

      Funny enough, this happened before Goblin Slayer got trending, lol.
      And yeah... I think they just found it either funny or erotic for himself

  • @philldeschene
    @philldeschene 5 лет назад +24

    This DM sounds like he'd fit better with F.A.T.A.L.

    • @scottydu81
      @scottydu81 4 года назад

      I was actually looking for FATAL videos and came across this

    • @ASquared544
      @ASquared544 4 года назад +1

      I'm afraid to ask but... what does that acronym mean?

    • @scottydu81
      @scottydu81 4 года назад +3

      ASquared It was a 900 page document that was rape fetish fanfic disguised as an RPG. It originally stood for Fantasy Adventure To Adult Lechery, but was changed to From Another Time Another Land. It also has its own death metal theme song and overall ranks as one of the worst things ever made.

  • @davidjohnson6665
    @davidjohnson6665 5 лет назад +7

    Pardon me for saying this but that DM’s going to live a long and lonely life. You know you’ve messed up when you’re used as an example of a bad DM!

  • @brucesshipyards744
    @brucesshipyards744 4 года назад +1

    By the Emperor! What kind of Slaaneshi heresy-

  • @fatcoyote2
    @fatcoyote2 5 лет назад +42

    Egyptian & Ancient Greek myths have stories like the way this setting starts.

    • @mennograafmans1595
      @mennograafmans1595 5 лет назад +12

      Indeed. It's not that weird in comparison with real religions. The rape and futa goblins and the way the DM describes it is though.

    • @fatcoyote2
      @fatcoyote2 5 лет назад +4

      @@mennograafmans1595 Oh yeah. That was definitely off-putting. If you're going to do something like this, you have to prep people or it isn't going to take, especially if it's literally the only hook the story is going to take.

    • @Aplesedjr
      @Aplesedjr 5 лет назад

      menno graafmans read about most of the stuff Zeus did in his free time. Rape goblins are child’s play compared to most of that.

    • @mennograafmans1595
      @mennograafmans1595 5 лет назад

      @@Aplesedjr Indeed, but those weren't religious, those goblins were "real life" in the game.
      And besides, Zeus wasn't the worst. Some central american, african and norse gods also liked to stick their dick where it didn't belong.

    • @ScavengerKing
      @ScavengerKing 5 лет назад

      Its also the context - if the DM had started out with "trans/intersex fertility goddesses created the world" it would have been a neat homage to real world mythology. But let's be honest, the use of the word "futa" told us all we needed to know about the DM's intentions.

  • @supercharliegalaxy
    @supercharliegalaxy 5 лет назад +12

    I love the cow and chicken reference XD
    Edit: Also I like to think my Kenku Cleric Bob Lyrebird would nope out of there once the big futa goblins came into play X'D

  • @DetectiveNyx
    @DetectiveNyx 5 лет назад +30

    I honestly feel sorry for any trans girl that has to endure that DM in future whether in or out of the game, good grief.

    • @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth
      @PotatoPatatoVonSpudsworth 4 года назад

      Yeah... this guy clearly cannot comprehend how other people feel/think compared to himself. Like he was having a great time so he just assumed everyone else would.

    • @Lucyller
      @Lucyller 4 года назад

      Tbf, trans =/= futanari. In western word, it would be an hermaphrodite.
      Trans are called intersexe, or dickgirl/cuntboy more vulgarly.
      Sorry for the useless teaching xd

  • @Hyperversum3
    @Hyperversum3 5 лет назад +4

    I love these things.
    Bring back memories to the old times on /tg/ when they made you remember why Tabletop RPGs were so niche.
    Bad old times.

  • @Mamoreno0215
    @Mamoreno0215 3 года назад +1

    I'm going to take a wild guess and say that the dm is a big fan of Goblin Slayer, judging from 4:56