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Rebound Relationships | The 5 Stages The Dumper Goes Through
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- Опубликовано: 3 янв 2022
- In today's video, Nick from The Love Fix will discuss rebound relationships and the 5 stages the dumper goes through.
The dumper will go through multiple stages during rebound relationships from relief all the way to conflict, which could lead to them ending the rebound relationships to reconcile with you.
Take a walk with Nick and find out the 5 stages the dumper goes through during rebound relationships.
If you would like personalised advice and coaching regarding your breakup situation, email me at TheLoveFix20@gmail.com to arrange an appointment.
Voice coaching x1 hour Zoom call £50
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Thanks, Nick! Great video as always.
Thanks Chevy.
I hope you’re well. 😊
@@TheLoveFix-Nick Nick what about if they are having good sex with the rebound? My wife and I has a sexless marriage for the past few years I tried to get her to open up about it but she closed herself up physically and mentally with me..I decided to leave her after 7 years of marriage but I never asked for a divorce,but she did and she hasn't even tried to discuss saving the marriage,after 3 months of separation she has met someone alot younger than herself, he is 16 years younger..my question is because we wasn't having sex and now she is having sex with the new guy,as he's been staying over at her place can this be classed as a rebound? And will she ever leave him as she told me she moved on and in a good place with this new guy...but I'm not convinced I dont know why she didn't want to fix it with me! And also she's been trying to get pregnant too,another thing I dint understand as she seemed bothered about having a child with me when we were together ,she is 45yrs old and the new bloke is 29yrs old What's your take on this? She also told me it just happened suddenly with this guy and she told me she never cheated on me while we were together...I'm just shocked at the timing and how quick she moved on...
That’s a lot to unpack buddy.
Is it a rebound? Quite possibly
After a lack of sex for the last few years, it’s reasonable to assume she’s in lust and not love with the new guy.
You decided to leave her right? Do you think it’s reasonable for her to come get you?
I don’t know if she will ever leave him.
The big question here buddy how and why do you have so much information on her? This isn’t healthy for you.
Don’t ever be shocked how quickly people can “move on”! Anyone is capable of anything buddy.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick Hi Nick I dont think it is reasonable for her to come get me,I think she's too occupied now with this new guy,I left her cause I could not take the fact she was with holding sex from me and gave me no explanation as to why? We was together for 11 years and married for 7 years the last three years was sexless in that time her health wasn't great and had weight issues as she lost weight alot and eating habits were not good..although I must say she's the same now I tried to help her but again my help was ignored. She opened up to this new guy but wasn't willing to open up to me her husband..I am now waiting for her to send the divorce papers for me to fill in and sign..
@@TheLoveFix-Nick I guess I have alot of information on her because I've been living with her for over 9 years
Never accept back someone who needed to break your heart, be with someone else just to find out that you were what they needed all along. That's rubbish. And it should not be tolerated. Respect yourself. You are worth more then that.
You don't know how much I needed this! Thank you.
Don't tell me what to do. I love my ex, and we just have some misunderstandings. Sure I'm the one who took her for granted and she was the one who left me but don't EVER tell me to move on. I haven't done all what I want to make her happy.
Mist-Kun. With all due respect. If you don’t like the content, don’t listen to it.
I wish you well.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick no, it's not about your content. it's about the comment. Don't worry, I listened to your video open-mindedly and I'm considering what I've heard in it
@@MistSGM You do you....just don't blame anybody else except yourself once you realized that you came second and were never good enough to stay with the whole time. Once it finally dawns on you that you sat around and allowed your partner to take you for granted and go experience someone else's body...and THEN come back to you...your gonna realize you devalued yourself and it will more then likely just happen again. Due to the fact that they know you will always be there waiting.
If your good with all that ..then by all means go on ahead. Just know there's no self respect in it. Good luck to you though.
Never go back with an ex who gets in a rebound relationship. After they get used and abused they wanna get back with you. Do not tolerate it.
Had a relationship that lasted 12y. She Cheated on me with a guy she met on a mobile game while I was planning to propose to her. I graduated and got my first job. She was sitting at home playing those games and failing at college, always complaining that I wouldn’t help her cleaning when I paid the rent, the food and I was busting my ass off! One month later she moved in with the guy and left her family and her friends (moved over 600 miles away)…😂 I dodged a fucking bullet. 🙌🏼
The first months were hard but the pain will fade away. But only if you take this as an opportunity to work on yourself. I let the other guy handle the baggage. Stay strong guys.
That man did you a huge favor. Imagine how you life would be if he didn't come in the picture.
Similar situation. Met my ex through a game, then we ended up meeting in real life. Even lived with her for a bit. One thing lead to another , lead me to end up Moving back home , and she ended up leaving me for another guy on the same game lmfao. Sick world.
That’s shit Null and I’m sorry to hear that. It’s a reflection of her, not you. But we must do a better job screening who we get with.
I hope you’re feeling better.
@@brandon9638 100% man. I’m thankful for what happened. Sometimes old things must die so something new can be created but you have to see it as an opportunity.
Oh my gosh, she's so lucky to have you...oh well you deserve the best too bruh ...
"Short term gain...LONG TERM PAIN!!!" That is SOOOOO true!!! One coach said it best: a Rebound Relationship is similar to putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. You can run but YOU CAN'T HIDE because the pain will come back to haunt them.
Another reason why they fail miserably...unresolved issues with an ex- that results in any sort of physical confrontation with them and the rebound's new partner.
I would agree. Sit back, grab some popcorn and watch the fireworks 😈
Im agree and I feel that it's painful, because he is still communicating with her ex, and I decide to broke up to him, because the relationship with him
@@TheLoveFix-Nick😂 i am enjoying it
"Fourthly, they stay with the rebound, post it on social media pretending how great everything is despite them being miserable. if that is the case, then let them burn - we all make our own hell, so wish them well with theirs" LOL. epic.
Great upload. My favorite of the rebound stages videos on RUclips. I appreciate you, Nick! keep up the great work
Thank you sir. I appreciate you to. I hope it can help in some small way. Stay strong brother.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick i'm staying strong. it was a LDR. I initially thought her new relationship was a rebound that started 2 months after the breakup, but turns out she had been official with this guy a whole month before breaking up with me (monkey branch? overlapping relationship? )
i had suspected cheating over the last few months of the relationship but at the same time she was showing so much emotion and investment in our relationship, even during that month where she was with me and that guy, down to the last day she was taking about a trip together with me. so my question is: should i break NC (of two months...it's my 2nd NC with her. first one was also after 2 months) to confront her about her cheating? or should i let her burn?
FYI my friends were the ones that told me about her relationship as i don't have social media. but they said she doesn't even look happy in her "happy 6 months together" new photo lol. i was already healing and had a few doubts about wanting her back but this cheating sealed the deal for me. but it would be satisfying seeing her relationship fail and her regret what she did. so what do you think?
Let her burn brother.
That’s not a monkey branch. That’s flat out cheating.
The bigger question is this. Why would you want to contact a woman who treated you with so much disrespect? That is not a high value woman and you can do better.
I would advise that you tell your friends not to give you any information regarding your ex going forward. Your a man on his purpose and not have time for suck things.
As for confronting her…. It’s a tough one. I think you’ll have to ask yourself will it achieve anything and what would you get out of it?
@@TheLoveFix-Nick I had told my friends not to inform me of her social media before, but they felt this one was a must because it revealed that she cheated and would help me move forward. I actually thanked them for it. It confirmed my suspicions were true and that she lied when i asked her about it during the break up talk.
You're right. I guess confronting her about it now might not serve much purpose. She will regret it if she isn't already. Almost 4 years together. I was her first love, bf, everything. Sad she went from being so loyal and worrying about me cheating (anxious attacher) to her being the cheater.
But I've leveled after reflecting on the relationship itself. Picked up 2 new hobbies. Got back into playing football. Have even been talking to another girl.
Thanks, nick! You the king. My continued support you shall have.
Let her burn it shall be.
It would seem people like her were always going to do what they were going to do.
This pain will teach you a great lesson and you will be thankful for it.
Go read or listen to a book called The Subtle Art Of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson and No More Mr Nice Guy by Doctor Robert Glover.
Two books that changed my life and are required reading for men in my opinion.
Stay strong brother. I appreciate your support. 😊
Everything we do in life we feel or pay for later in life either good or bad! Moving on way too quick isn’t normal emotionally it’s all energy misplaced
I like the "courtesy car" comparison. Great analogy. Also, "Your ex is not one in a million but one of a million." Great points made throughout.
I’m glad it could help. Thank you for your kind words. I hope you’re well.
well...i was a rebound, this is painful and deep inside is relief, 6 months.. i really liked her and starting to love her. It's sucks that i was never enough...in the begining i was cautious, all my friends told me that i am only a backup, but never listen to them, now i am recovering...For people who are reading this there is a saying "the best way to get over your ex is to find another partner", this is f* up the way i feel now i will never do this thing to another person, the best thing is to process your emotion first. Now i am slowly getting my confidence back and never will agree to be a backup again.
I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this buddy, it’s indeed hurtful.
Incoming tough bro love.
It’s not that you’re not enough. You are enough. Her rebounding to you is a reflection of her. It’s a reflection of her trauma. It’s a reflection of how she chose to handle her breakup.
“I will never do this thing to another person”
I believe you believe that, but until you go through it yourself, you don’t know that. Also, what you would do is irrelevant. You’re not her. She did what she did and that’s okay. She’s operating from her worldview, from her trauma.
What matters now is how you respond to how you feel. How you level up from here.
The breakup isn’t about you my friend. It’s about how she felt, her trauma, and how she feels about the relationship with you. It’s not attack on you as a person. She simply doesn’t romance with you.
I know this is savage advice, but when we stop making breakups about ourselves, but rather focus on ourselves, what your ex does, says and feels is of little consequence. Lions don’t concern themselves with the opinions of sheep. Do you want to be the lion, or the sheep?
The day you understand that mindset and implement it, will be the day you level up and find your way to much better women.
I learned how to trade stocks as a side hustle. Lost 30 lbs at the gym and refocused my relationships with friends and family. Redirect your focus and let them go.
Great work, my friend. Keep fighting the good fight. Smashing it. 😊💪
When she entered my life I thought she was single and emotionally available.
I was the rebounders temporary fix.
This teaching is perfect from every perspective 😌
Sorry to hear that, but I hope the experience helped made you stronger 😊
How long did it last?
@@LG-ly7pw I was breadcrumbed for 3 months 😵💫.
Now married 30+ years 😌
How about from rebound. They last for 1 year and then jump to another rebound is there possible to back from first rebound?
@@orlandosadaya7695 don’t return to the rebounder.
Approaching 8 billion people in the world, if you are heterosexual, this leaves you nearly 4 billion -1 one to choose from.
I really needed to hear this at this point of my life. I had to replay it a few times to let it sink in. While I know she will be back, i know I'm worth more than a second choice or a back-up plan.
I’m glad it helped. Thanks for listening and I hope you’re okay.
"Some exes just don't come back"
Phew, almost thought I'd have to deal with that
Deal with what, exactly?
@@TheLoveFix-NickI think he just meant he didn’t want to ever deal with his ex again
I ended up being the band-aid she needed without me even knowing it until it was too late and it’s scary how everything you said was true lmao. It was interesting hearing it from the different perspective. During our first problem in the relationship 3 months in she storms out, gives up on me and goes back to her ex. Been 2 months now doing well recovering from the hurt, continuing being my best self, seeking god and being more discipline . Gotta keep on walking💪
Stay strong brother. You’ve got this.
I LOVE YOU BROTHER. STAY STRONG. IT'S BEEN 2 MONTHS FOR ME. I HOPE MY EX REALIZES THAT SHE FUCKED UP.
@@edwinhernandez5581 bro it doesn't matter if she thinks she fucked up breaking up from you. This just tells me you still haven't moved on from her. Start going to the gym, meditate, pick up the bible and start setting reasonable goals for yourself. Your ex doesn't care how you feel and that should free you
@@DiegoE47 I have a few questions. Was there signs that you were the rebound? Did it end suddenly out of the blue? Did she know she was rebounding?
My exes rebound was on and off for 2 months lmao they had problems earlyyyyy on. Drama conflict. We had mutual friends so I heard from them and it made me laugh not gonna lie. Thankfully I’m a master of acceptance so I get over break ups within the first month so I was over it by then. Best advice ever is to always always start accepting they are never ever coming back. A rebound failing will be an ego boost for you, but if you heal you won’t even care!
All due respect my friend, if you’re over it, why are you on a breakup channel listening about rebounds?
@@TheLoveFix-Nick did I say something offensive to you? Or are you trying to argue because I’m not interested.
Emmalyn, i merely asked a question based on the information you provided. You say you’re over it. If that is true, one must must wonder why you’re consuming breakup content. The reason i asked that question was to make you aware of the possibility that your words are not aligned with your actions. Looking to argue? No. Helping you to identify a possible wound that still needs some love? Yes.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick well although I appreciate your concern I can assure you it’s not that deep. This video popped up randomly I didn’t search it lol and I commented because it was something I had experienced. This happened ages and ages ago and I’m in a new relationship now with a baby on the way. Not everyone has to be going through something to comment on a past experience. It’s in the past.
Fair enough 😊
Needed to hear this.
Going to meet with my exes parents today to get my jacket back and give them some of her stuff. They seem happy to see me again. I've spent all of NC building myself and I'm at a point where I'm happy again . I also get to close the book myself, give me the closure I never got from her
Glad to hear it buddy.
I would advise you not to bring up the relationship with the parents, in fact avoid talking about your ex if you can.
You already have the close bud, the relationship ended. As harsh as they may sound, that’s all the closure you need.
“Closure” is just an excuse we tell ourselves to pursue what we want despite already knowing that outcome.
You’re doing great. Show indifference but polite. You’re on your path and purpose. Anyone not onboard with that can vacate.
Let me know how it goes.
James, your last reply was deleted by youtube buddy. If you used numbers in the text, spell the number. They typically block messages with numbers in them
They’re still blocking you dude. Email me. TheLoveFix20@gmail.com
4 months separated from a 10 year relationship and she’s seeing someone already. It’s killing me. 😢. This vid has been excellent though.
Steve, that’s tough man. I’d be hurting too. However, i would now be thinking she is showing her value to be quite low and i do not want such low value in my life. You’re going to be fine buddy.
She was talking to him before you broke up
That’s rough man.
She’s showing you who she is. Be strong enough to walk away and find better.
I hope you’re okay.
Been in a 2 years relationship not 10 like yours but after 3 months and half she already seeing someone else. I know your pain. I can’t understand how can someone do that. I got dumped still don’t know the reason why
We don’t necessarily need to understand their actions. They are who they are.
What we need to understand is ourselves and how we heal.
I believe this is one of the best rebound videos around on youtube
Well done Nick
Thank you L G. I hope you’re well.
This is a great video. I’ve listened to it numerous times to get my head around the ex in a rebound and calming my anxiety. ❤️
Thank you Gaynor. I hope you’re feeling better.
Update us LG
@@tyetr9853 my exs rebound is still going apparently. I don’t have any information. I do check social media occasionally which I have almost stopped doing. I don’t really care anymore. Im mostly over it.
My anxiety was so high for months but I’ve worked very hard to get my life back on track. Im so grateful for the breakup because otherwise I would not know all the things I now know about relationships, breakups, attachment, narcissism… absolutely invaluable information.. and now I’m looking into doing a course in mental health to help others.
I still have many moments of loneliness and I still have flashbacks and once in a while I’ll still have a cry. It’s not really about him, it’s just the random memories and the investment I made, I gave it my all. And I can hold my head up high for that.
All I can say is do the emotional work on yourself and you will be so grateful later.. either by re-attracting your reasonably healthy ex (mine was definitely not healthy) or blowing someone else away by the changes you make.
Good for you L G 💪
Just stumbled upon this channel. I'm extremely lucky about content (50, currently divorcing, with a LOT of relationship experience), so normally I listen to about a minute of these videos and move on. I have to say that you seem to actually know your shit, and express it well. I was looking for content on my wife's rebound relationship (had been cheating for half of the marriage), and most of the "coaches" are guys with nowhere near my experience with women, and it shows. So many videos dealing with this topic were under the umbrella of the "how to get your ex back", or "how to know what your ex is thinking"... WHO CARES! These videos just support the weak-minded simps' desire to get back with the girl who destroyed them, which is NEVER a good idea. I like your approach. Analytical, unbiased, and focused one the emotional wellbeing of the guy.
Well done, and I look forward to exploring your library of videos.
Sorry to hear you’re going through that Charlie.
Day 1 on RUclips is catchy titles and thumbnails. Get your ex back and what they are thinking brings in views and I’ve certainly done that. I think that content is okay provided the message is to focus on yourself regardless.
Ultimately we’re in control of no one but ourselves. Letting go and focusing on what we do should be the easiest thing in the world, but most people have sadly outsourced all love validation to their partners. When the relationship ends they literally have nothing.
I appreciate your kind words and support. I hope you’re doing well.
You hit the nail on the head with the low hanging fruit. This guy was messaging my ex when we was in a relationship and he got friend zoned. Now she's seeing him a week after out split. What comforts me is he's a weasel as 1. He was trying to muscle in on a woman in a relationship and 2. He'll know he's a rebound. When she sees he's a weasel she'll miss the loss and I'll be moved on.
PS. Love your content mate 👌
Sorry to hear that buddy.
Try not to have any information regarding your ex from this point forward. Radio silence my friend.
Work on you, take care of the things you got wrong and level up.
If she did ever come back, you’ll be so far in front of her you’ll probably won’t like her anymore and will jog her on.
If she doesn’t come back….. over 3 billion women out there. You’ll find someone better.
Thanks for supporting the channel mate. I hope you feel better.
This is exactly whats happening to me right now, I feel you brother, but honestly too after watching this video it really made me think, because he's right, why should I still care for someone when instead of them trying to work out our problems with the relationship, she went to weasel for just insant gratification, I don't deserve to be her back after her rebounds fail
@@elmo3040 thanks brother. Her rebound failed, she's gone into the 'validate me' on social media phase. That will burn out soon. Keep strong bro. I'm on day 31 now. Lost 8lbs and listening to Nick and other videos to reflect and stay strong in NC. Not gonna lie I still miss her but it gets slightly better everyday. Keep me posted with your progress mate 👍 keep your chin up king 🤴
Got my bracelet back today 😀 hit me with a "hope you are OK" checked myself straight back into the no contact hotel. Have a good weekend guys. Stay strong 💪
@@TheLoveFix-Nick@Adsybaby that's the same how I see it.. work on yourself. I ended up joining a bootcamp gym.. I used the energy from the breakup and put it into hard core training . Seeing result and feeling confident. As soon as you shift those emotions of her. That's when you take the power. Walk away no contact and go full force on you!! make money, buy new clothes. Go out and find new pussy. While your ex is all just having fun and getting pounded and not focusing on herself, you are on your purpose.. eventually she might hit you up but by that time you are a new solid improved person. Shes wont be on your level. You will reject her because you will see she hasnt done shit and all your hard work will blow her ass away. You will see that she is just waste and to go back to it it's not even worth it.. thats when things will flip on her a d you become the dumper..cus you dont want a beat up cum dumpster to fuck up your program..
What a great video !!!! I needed to hear this ! 3 months into our separation he’s in a new relationship & already moved in with the girl ! Wish them the best & let them go ! Let it hurt then let it go !!!
We argued he broke up with me after few weeks he's in a relationship. 💔
Sorry to hear that Mari. I think breakups shows people’s true colours. That behaviour was always within him.
HANG IN THERE WARRIOR
Hey bros! Stop caring about someone that doesn't reciprocate your values and emotions.
Make them regret it. Get yo ass to the gym. ITS TIME LETS FKING GOOOOO!!! YEEEEAAAA BOOOOOIIIIIIII AAAAA SPAAAAARTA. NO SURRENDER. CONQUER.
You don't know true love unless you have a relationship with God through Jesus Chist for Love is giving- Lust is taking
Love is purity and lust is sin
Love develops and lust destroys
Love is peaceful and lust creates anxiety,
Love is patient and lust wants it right away. 1 John 4:8 Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love.
I disagree but I wish you well.
Thank you well explained.. heartbroken but your video was so helpful to understand.
My pleasure. I hope you’re feeling better today 😊
Bro… I’m really feeling your delivery style. Much respect!
Thanks buddy. I hope you’re doing well.
Man... You are a LEGEND my Friend, LEGEND!
You’re the legend Clayton. Thanks for supporting the channel 😊
Guys, a rebound it's actually a blessing in disguise. It happened to me when I have rebounded and it happened twice when people I was dating rebounded. 1st I personally think she monkey branched and after I have accepted the break up and moved dating someone else she started to reach out. 3 years after our break up and she was still wishing me happy birthday and asking to meet up until I had to block her. 2nd experience is about my actual break up, actually the person I;ve started dating after my ex, we were together for almost double of the amount of my first relationship but this time I've called the break up due to lack of respect for my partner because when a women doesn't respect you she is basically breaking up with you, keep in mind, women break up with you from the moment they start to treat you badly. Nevertheless we had a business and pets together, mutual friends and we had to stay in contact for almost 3 months at the end of which she rebounded with someone and from that moment I went no contact. Even blocked her on all forms of communication, yesterday, one of our mutual friends reached out to me letting me know that my ex would like to talk with me. But I'm already moved on so I came here only to let everyone know that if after the break up you IMPROVE YOURSELF on all levels THEY ARE ALWAYS COMING BACK. If you are suffering now and you will read my next sentence, as I was doing it previously you will not agree but: "YOU CAN"T TAKE THEM BACK" this is your time to shine, they've tried to replace you and ... they failed. Yes, I'm ok with getting back together after a breakup but not after a rebound. So, yes, rebounds are the best thing that can happen to you. Stay strong, stay safe and continue to improve yourself.
I've just come out of a 4 month relationship with a guy and I was his rebound!! He was only 2 months out of a 14 year relationship. She went off with someone else! What's worse is that I've seen most of your videos about rebounds and I still ended up in one!!! I'll listen to both your videos and my intuition next time!!! 🙈🤣
I’m sorry to hear that. Be kind to yourself and try to figure out why you still ended up in one. I hope you feel better.
Thank you this video, I could never understand this rebound issue, why they need somebody else if they are comming back to me, it is illogic this behavioir.The advice was excelent and in my opinion if these people need rebound they always will look outside of the relationship for support.Aso, means that they are not selective , considering people are changable, and they are impulsive too.
My first video from this channel, just recommended. This material, and delivery of it , is just phenomenal. Wow.
Appreciate it GG Cade. 😊 I hope it was able to help you in some small way.
I hope you’re doing well.
Bro I think I’ve heard a couple of your videos but your ability to paint pictures in this one was immaculate. The perfect storm and the rental car was good
Thanks man, I hope it helped.
Poetry I swear. Content is amazing but I’m also here for the poetry 💕
You know what’s funny. That first statement of an ex doing the same things they were doing with you with the next relationship.
Exactly the same situation that I am seeing right now. Pretty ironic.
Thankyou needed to hear this as I've had a 6month relapse 😢 my ex dumped me, took his rebound abroad within weeks ....here's hoping things may not be sooo perfect!
I have a video on relapse.
I hope it helps.
ruclips.net/video/D6BteVKcf3w/видео.htmlsi=gjw_bDQYCImPEAEY
@@TheLoveFix-Nick thankyou I will watch x
He cheated and now they are together posting photos together. He said she's a thousand better than me 🤣
Well, that’s not a rebound. That’s cheating/monkey branching. I am sorry you had to go through that and i hope you’re feeling better.
Let them Burn!! I love it!! Thanks Nick!!
You’re welcome Jen. I hope you’re well
The best video about rebound I've ever found
Much appreciated 😊
I hope you’re well.
I don't want my ex back. I just come to listen to your accent 🤣
Thanks, I made it myself. 😂
This was great. My ex has a Lot of behavioral issues and can only hide them so long. I tolerated them because I loved her so long but some newbie may not put up with it. Not proud I did but we have a long sordid history. Have fun!! Lol
My ex rebounded with LOW hanging fruit but already thinking marriage with him as she is settling because ahe feels like she needs to hurry and marry someone quick. She knew the guy wheh they were young. He still lives with his mom and dad at 32
My ex is rebounding with my best friend. Hurts like shit because now I've lost 2 people dear to me
This video is the best I've seen, I was IN such dispare I didn't know which way to turn, I can't thank you enough for your help
Thanks buddy. I’m glad it could help and I hope you feel better.
Nick, can u expand on "they will do exactly opposite of what they did with u"
Sure.
Typically, they will do things to try and validate their decision to leave.
So, if for example if you didn’t go to many bars, they may start to frequent bars.
Boy that ending is everything. They wanted their cake and to eat it too. FUCK EM.
It's funny because the first two long term relationships I had they both went off with other guys.
The first one she went off with a minor! As in....an under age guy! The second one went off with a past friend from school.....safety net. As you mentioned. She married and had two kids with him....but it was still ultimately a rebounder.
This third time....again another guy very quickly. I imagine someone from the past also.
I've always stuck it out and felt the pain.....each time I've got stronger.
This has been the biggest one marriage and 3 kids. The first two helped me know what to expect.
This current one....as we have kids she's like the double minded spouse.
She wants us to spend family time together while she has weekends away with this guy.
She seems to think this is her way forward and future.
It's very bizzare to think someone thinks stability comes in deception and hiding in the shadows.
It's taken me a year and almost there now.
Stupid thing is she's followed her mums path.....and her mum many years later admits it was the biggest mistake she ever made...25 years on !
Testament that regret always happens.
I will never ever understand how ppl can rebound. I couldn’t even imagine dating someone. My ex rebounded as well because she was miserable but she’s been with that rebound for about 7 months now. She said they dragged her out of the pain of the break up, gave her the harmony she was missing with us since we argued so much, that she’s not making future plans and she’s not speaking about love and that we had something special. Yet they are still together months later. It hurts like hell and I will never understand. Also that someone is so so unattractive and they are completely different in interests etc… WHY?! 😓🤯
also they are rebounding with each other because that person just got out of their 6 year relationship as well… 2 people pretending they are emotionally ready for one another and forgot the past. She had been with a guy for 6 years (even engaged) and a few months after her break up got together with a woman (my ex)…that is all so strange and I can’t wrap my head around it.
I’m sorry to here that’s buddy. That’s a shit and painful situation.
But dude, how and why do you have all this information? It’s just going to hurt you more. 😩
@@TheLoveFix-Nick Im a girl btw 😜 because I always looked through insta and got really obsessed.. I’m really thinking about deleting the app for a while and not look but somehow it’s driving me nuts not to know anything..i know it’s stupid but it’s also addictive 😣
I apologise. I shouldn’t have been so presumptuous.
I get the urge to social media stalk, but when a cure becomes a disease, it’s time to change the medication.
I thinking come off social media for a bit will help. Also unfollow your ex.
Here i am again! Today my emotions are out of control! A lot anxiety ... shaken up, cryin like a baby, a lot of pain.... yea today im not having it. Been 3 months it... it just doesn't get better for me
I hear you man. It’s okay to cry it out.
Once you’re done, look at getting therapy. Try some 10 minute meditation and go be with friends and family.
I love the courtesy car analogy!
Thank you, Melanie.
I hope you’re well. 😊
@@TheLoveFix-Nick I'm fine thanks Nick. Besides my freak of an ex rebounding with a courtesy car immediately after dumping me! 😅
I love the background picture 🤣
Why thank you 😜😁
I love this. Thank you so much. I really needed to hear this.
My pleasure. I hope you’re doing well 😊
Bro, you nailed it more than anyone else
Appreciate it buddy. I hope you’re well.
What if youre the dumper. And you had no choice but to walk away from the relationship because it was feeding you with breadcrumbs. Leading the both parties to get hurt. And then, you ( dumper) stayed single and tried to heal the wounds while the dumpee (ex boyfriend) is now on dating apps looking out for new person in their life
This happens quite frequently. You’ll be surprised how many dumpers I coach one to one in this situation.
It’s a rough and horrible feeling, because you didn’t want to breakup, but you no other choice.
I’m willing to bet you feel like the dumpee, right?
If I were in your position, I’d be thinking to myself that their actions (the dumpee) merely proved that I was right to leave.
Their actions tell you everything you need to know.
You can still love someone and the breakup be the right decision.
Nonetheless, they’ll go through a similar process as outlined in this video.
I hope you feel better 🫂🫂
About two months ago, I would have done anything to rebuild my relationship with my ex and told her so. She allowed me to think there was a chance, all the while hooking up with an old 'friend'. I'm seriously moving on with my life, but I'd love for her to ask to try again, just so I can tell her to fuck off.
That’s rough man and I’m sorry to hear that.
You moving on, is telling her to f*ck off.
Move on, live your life!
Love the way you explain this
I’m glad it could help 😊
You are correct. We were in a mostly good four-year relationship/situationship. My ex is avoidant. After expressing deep feelings he began the slow fade, eventually monkey branching. Fear got the best of him. The new relationship was set up by her family to help her overcome an issure. My ex was chosen, and being a people pleaser, he couldn't say "no". She knows nothing about me. He wanted to " see where it goes ". His plan was to date her and be friends with me. I don't think he expected me to leave, but I walked away without a tear. No questions, I just said " okay" and left. NC forever for me. Talk about low hanging fruit. An avoidant and a new love with emotional problems. ... (I am not making this s**t up. It's crazy!). I am healing and have moved on. SMDH.😁
Thank you for this..
I am so glad to have your calm, rational insight and positive affirmation and perspective on this. thank you. I appreciate your sharing.
It's a much more understandable and
digestable explanation on things that I have experienced , than the whole Narcissist angle, which was really upsetting me more, as it tends to get very negative and even hateful.
It never resonated with me that my Ex has NPD even though he discarded me and replaced me immediately with a new person (or 'supply' as it gets called in the Narcissistic abuse community)..
It's easy for me to fathom that he ran out on the issues in our relating rather than talk them through and sort them out and simply rebounded and was interested in fun new adventures and experiences and didn't want to feel any pain over our breakup.
he was such a huge part of my life. we were really close.
it was extremely painful to me.
I commited to grieving the break up and my growth game because I want to love again and any man I love will never ever just he a bandaid, a cheap thrill, a distraction or supply.
I won't be ready for that kind of love until I no longer ever think of the former lost love, don't speak his name, don't get triggered or feel sad or anger..
I still do, so I am not ready ..but when I am ..I look forward to it.
My man will only get the best from me ..the best version of myself..
my exes rebound chick can have his raggedy ass and listen to him talk about me and sense him feeling discontent and not truly connected with her..and if that's enough for her, then it's good because she already has him.
I want better..I want the best and I want to BE the best.
This has all been about developing my self esteem by treating myself in esteemable ways, not neglecting myself and then being dependent on the attention of others to surrogate what I have not formed a habit around nurturing myself with.
He taught me that, through the rejection.
As I nurture and validate and accept myself, I attract matching energy.
Best yet!!!
Thanks Tom. I hope you’re doing well.
31 days into a blindsided monkeybranch. We had a beautiful healthy loving happy 3yr relationship. We loved right up until this. In 3yrs we had never had a fight, never raised our voices, but loved happily. She had always told me how grateful she was to have found me the love of her life. The guy she went with is just a lowly kinda guy w a bad rep. I initiated no contact 22ish days ago. I have to heal & move on. We had dated for a month and she posted our first picture and introduced me as the love of her life. We posted on our social media thru the years and everyone knew how happy we were. She hasnt posted anything about this new guy. She didnt tell her family or anything yet. All of our pictures are still on her social media. So idk..Also, my daughter showed me a recent picture of her and I was shocked. The beautiful bright sparkle in her eye and smile is completely gone. She looks soo unhappy. I treated that woman w love & respect & loyalty thru the years. Still in shock but getting thru this. Thanks for the video.
Sorry to hear that man.
Fact you never argued is a red flag. Healthy relationships have “good” arguments.
Sounds like you’re too nice maybe and that becomes attractive after a while.
Check this video which explains what happens after 3 years to some people
ruclips.net/video/qSCpPdayPKs/видео.html
Also, go read/listen to a book called No More Mr Nice Guy. Trust me!
@@TheLoveFix-Nick thank U!!
God speed, my respect to you, your videos are powerful and honest
Thank Rafy. Appreciate you supporting the channel.
What if i was the dumper and realized that we needed to break up because we want different things for our future and the dumpee didn’t take it well in the beginning but then she went ahead and started dating a carbon copy of me literally not even two weeks passed? Emotionally physically mentally i am done with her and I’m happy she found someone and now I started dating someone as well and I truly believe he’s not a rebound i grieved the relationship i cried the tears and i went to therapy now i feel like I’m ready to be with this person whom i like so much and i hope she feels the same with her new partner aswell
It’s kind of the same thing.
Rebounding is essentially bypassing the pain of the breakup.
This is definitely the best film on you tube when it comes to a rebound
We never fight always having fun but in March she comes up with I doubt.
6weeks later she has a new boy ,proud on fb relation status immediately his name.
I really go to hell
We had a good stres free relationship...I thought.
Can't believe the nightmare I am in
Sorry to hear that Miami.
Try and stay it her social media and focus on you.
It will hurt but embrace the pain.
Pain leads to growth which leads to a better form of happiness.
You’ve got this.
The movie Along Came Polly is just like this.
Good film 😉
Absolutely amazingly said thanks for this buddy ..
Wow, this is definitely what is going on. He is the dumper. He and she went on a trip to other countries, posting photos of their trip together on social media. I'm hurt but not jealous because I know who that woman is. They will both hurt badly soon. That woman was his ex wife, years ago she cheated on him and left him for another man. 🤷🏻♀️
I will care, grow, heal and love myself💗
We all make our own hell Yvonne. Wish them well with theirs and focus on yourself 😊
Thanks bro I’ve been no contact she’s in a rebound after a month I spent 3 months crying now I don’t give an f and she tried calling me at ten in the morning yesterdayI tried calling back but no reply so I blocked her number I just think she wants her ego boosted
Hope you’re doing well buddy.
I love that isn't 100 in a million are one of a million.
😊😊
Thank you the wise words.I have learnt alot.Watching from Kenya.
I’m glad I could help Maggie. I hope you’re doing well. 😊
Am doing well.Thanks for the concern.
I am sorry but I cannot help but to chuckle at the impending implosion that’s about to take place. When she left I strongly knew that other people played a role and when everything falls apart the only people left are the ones that put her there, oh well. We work together so along with coworker info from time to time, I swear I could see the stages taking place all the while I wouldn’t let her speak to me… she texted me a couple of days ago (5mo later) saying that a podcaster reminded her of me and the way I used to speak about about life and that she strongly felt that I would like his content.😏… thanks for the heads up!
Sorry to hear that buddy.
Did you respond to her message?
@@TheLoveFix-Nick yes, very very lightly. I’m not worried about chatting with her, I’m ok and she won’t get back that easily but for her it’s a start I guess lol.
Seems like an indirect direct approach. Dipping her toe in the water to test the temperature.
As you say, keep it light and let her initiate contact.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick yessir! I’ll keep ya posted. I don’t hate her, definitely upset with her, she just needs to come at me correct.
@@wutabeta1187 Did anything end up happening?
Great video 💕
She said she doesn't feel for her ex anymore, and also deleted his pictures from social media but is guilty that she left him first and is the reason for his misery. She has introduced me with her close friends and her family too. Saw future with me too. But when her ex cries she feels guilty and gets confused for me but still does not wants to go back to him. Now she doubts that she loves me or not, and asked me to move on and doesn't want me to be part of her unstable life.
Will no contact work for me to get her back?
I’m sorry to hear that buddy.
No contact is to get you back.
No contact is indeed the best way to improve your chances of an ex coming back, but you should not put any hope on this.
Your ex has asked for a breakup. Give it to them and respect their wishes. The more you try to get them back the more you push them away.
I hope you feel better.
We are in both situation I choose to blocked him, just to have a peaceful, it's my choice but it help, I enjoying being single, I am started also to give more time to myself enjoying hangout with my friends it will help to release the pain, and about 5days since I broke up with him, because he still communicating with her ex and he still love her, so instead of staying and competing to that girl I decide to end up, because I feel that he needs me to reliever the pain from her ex in hongkong, it's not easy because I'm attach to him, but I need to continue life for my daughter
Wonderful talk 🎉
Thank you Srujana, I hope you’re well.
Very helpful thank you bro
My pleasure buddy, I hope you’re well.
Hurts, been less than a month and I saw him walking with another girl already after our 1 year relationship. He might just be her friend now, but I know he is most likely trying to get into a rebound with her. All I know is if he does get into a rebound I’ll have to let go of all hope of us getting back together because I cannot handle someone like that.
Sometimes the person has trouble being alone so it may not be a rebound but rather seeking a partner to fill a void
Which is a rebound.
That’s literally a rebound 🤦🏻♂️
Congrats on 1k subscribers!
Thanks buddy/ It's been a long hard road. RUclips can be unkind to small channels sometimes
@@TheLoveFix-Nick it'll flip soon! Just keep making great content =)
My ex got in a rebound a day after we broke up. She was the total opposite of me, they moved in together after 2 weeks. It was ridiculous. Still i anticipated that he will come back because it all seemed so much like a rush and a cheap replacement of our relationship and i hoped he would come back. On the day of them moving in together he stopped at my place to get some things. We talked for 5 minutes and he started about being together with me forever and that he misses me so much and we slept together. After that he went home and then told me he cant be with me. Funny but only that made me realize what an asshole he is and that i never ever want him back.
Ouch! That’s rough, but when shows you who they are, believe them!
He rebounded then cheated on the rebound!
He did you favour by leaving.
I hope you feel better.
Broke up with my ex on 5 Nov but she had already flagged out to me she was feeling conflicted with her feelings for me since September. Caused me to panic and being even more needy and insecure. She pulled the trigger and said she does not see a future with me anymore. Her bday was on 17 Nov and found out from her instagram that some guy has been giving her flowers and celebrating with her and even bringing her overseas for a staycation. I felt so betrayed and just deleted her off all my social media last night. It's heartbreaking to me as i was the one being dumped and it was a 2years+ relationship which we were even discussing marriage. But i learnt it takes 2 hands to clap and I cannot force someone who does not love me anymore to be with me.
I hope you’re feeling better today buddy.
How you feeling now ?
This is interesting for me because she told me at three am that she was having dreams and people were haunting her and I was one of them. Its been a month....and she gonna be working at the place we used to work. I feel bad for the rebound guy ha.
I love her unconditionally but I don't know how I would ever trust her again.
Love isn’t unconditional my friend. You love her based on a set of parameters that you find appealing. By it’s very nature that’s a condition.
Try loving yourself unconditionally and watch your thought process and life will change.
You’re going to be fine but it will take, time, effort and working on yourself.
Stay strong. You’ve got this.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick im able to love unconditionally because im on my purpose and I love myself. I did loose a bit of myself which is why I became resentful and stopped treating her as well but nah, theres no room for hate in my heart.
When I love someone I love them for who they are not what they can provide me. Which I think was the difference between me and her. She went right to validation weeks after we were together 5 and a half years. I just hope she can start loving herself.
That’s tough man.
Take a second to analyse what you just said. If the situation was reversed, how would advise me? May be something along the lines of “she chose instant gratification over working on the relationship. That tells you everything about her character “
You can and will do better. There are better calibre of partners out there but first work on your calibre and be the best you can.
She taught you a good lesson. Thank her, wish her well and say Bon Voyage! Btw say this internally, not to her directly 😂😂
I will take time and that’s the secret ingredient.
Allow yourself to hurt and grieve. It’s okay.
Pain is the most effective means for us to take action. Action leads to progress which leads to great things.
@fnord lander, you tube blocked your most recent comment. Try not to use numbers (1 2 3) and so on, instead spell the number (one, two, three)
They may have blocked it for another reason but I have no control over it.
Believe ive replied to one of these vids before. 15 years together. Broke up under 4 months ago now. A month after she rebounded to her best friend who lives in a different country. They have a lot in common, everything is online. After 2 months they are fully in love. We have kids together so ive had to vet the guy and interact with ex. Tried winning her back so much. She knows ive delt with my demons and therapy but wants no return as she is so happy.
From what i know he is fat 28yr old virgin whos wanted her for years. Lives with his parents and spends all his time gaming or in his room. They been speaking for years and the last year so much it made me paranoid. She told mutal friends she rates him a 7 and highly attractive. He caters to all her emotional wants. He is there for her and listens to all her whims etc. I do hope it implodes as i want my family back. Am trying to move on. Limited contact. She claims our relationship was toxic and i scared her. We have had arguments and such in past. Yet during BU claimed she was safe around me. They are in LDR and she is a physical person. Anxious attacher too. Other than deep compatability and i guess he is a looker in her eyes and does all the right things i doubt i can get my family back. Is this a rebound though? Am trying to move on also
I’ve responded to your email buddy. Let me know when you want to arrange the one to one session.
Great msg
Great video my x rebounded I don’t even knw hw I could accept her bk after she’s slept with someone else
Il take the rebound .
Why would I go back to my ex .never made room in her life with her children , no invites , average sex ..I'm an idiot as I gave her 4 years of my life ..I'm happy to go through the 5 stages ..
This video makes me realizes that I was the rebound….hahaha
Sorry to hear that Lucy. What makes you think you were the rebound?
Thank you.
i like ur videos...tnx this s happening to me right now
Sorry to hear that Sunny.
I promise you’ll be okay as long you work and focus on yourself.
Stay strong 💪💪💪
I love the video nick ive been watching this video alot along with others. Im just wondering how i could get a hold of you on how to deal with my grossly intertwined problem im having
You can email me at thelovefix20@gmail.com to arrange a one to one session 😊
Nice video but It would have been even better to also include the situation when the dumpee gets into a rebound relationship right after the breakup.
Thanks buddy. That’s a whole other video. I try to keep them under 15 minutes or people start sending death threats 😂😂😈😈
After 4 plus years together and 2 years of marriage, it came to a sudden end. That was on me. We were separated for about 6 weeks, hoping on reconciliation when she contacted an ex( the one that got away, she said). Their dating and whatever else the last 3 months. When a dumper goes back to an ex do things typically work out?
Sorry to hear that man. That’s must be hard to deal with.
Dude it’s not about if it works out. It’s why would you take someone back after rebounding back to an ex. That’s not a high quality woman my friend.
I decided to take a break because I felt like I wasn’t giving her the affection she wanted so I needed to get myself better in order to love her the way she deserves. After a 2yr relationship, she said she stopped feeling after 2 days post breakup and started seeing someone else a week later. Is she in a rebound relationship? She told me she has no feelings for me even though I highly doubt it because of how attached she was with me throughout the relationship. I just want her back to show her that I can give her what they want
Within 2 days? Ouch. Probably a monkey branch more than a rebound.
Really like your videos and really wanted to hear your opinion on my situation: I have been together with my gf for 7 years and in the last couple of years treated her poorly. I was toxic, manipulative and always criticising her (maybe because of my low self-esteem, my depression, anxiety...). She constantly told me to better myself and become happy since I was the one not being in a good shape. A few weeks ago she couldn't have this behaviour anymore and left. After a week she got into a rebound. I feel like I kind of deserved this. Yes, she could have been more clear and set some boundaries but I have been absolutely bad towards her. I now wonder what to do when she realises that I was still a good person on the inside that just hadn't have a clear mind. Also I'm going to have therapy soon.
Sorry to hear that man.
Go fix yourself. Not for her, do it for you.
She is where she is and you’ll have to square with that. There might be too much water under the bridge.
Stay strong man. Go to therapy if you have the means. Trust me it helps.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick thank you. I will fight, no matter what happens
Hey thanks for sharing. Similar situation here. Are they still together?
WISH YOU THE BEST HONEST MAN.
You know after hearing about these I think I was in a rebound relationship for 5 years with this girl, all of her exs didnt even make it 3 so I'm not sure if this is applicable to my situation sadly :(
What a legend 👌
Thank you for sharing this. Do you think a rebound is about the breakup time or more about the feelings the ex has for you? We broke up 6 months ago and my ex has strong feelings for me, which cannot be hidden but now they're in a rebound relationship...
A rebound is more about the feelings than time. Let’s say you’ve been single for 2 years, never got over your ex and started a new relationship, then that’s technically a rebound. It’s just most rebounds happen within the first 6 months post breakup.
But my friend, if her feelings are so strong for you, then why isn’t she with you?
Actions never lie and words don’t mean shit. Never forget that.
@@TheLoveFix-Nick Thank you very much for encouraging me. I've applied the non-contact rules, it's my week 3, let's see if I receive any message in the next weeks. I think he's confused in his head because he said "this time I'm going to choose security rather than love" - he was feeling insecure in the relationship because I said that I could have to leave the UK because of the pandemic :-(
My ex began to lose feelings over time months before the official breakup because of an issue i couldn’t fix that she kept bringing up. After the breakup, i begged her to give me a second chance to change which pushed her further away. During this time she was already seeking out a new partner and has found one about a month later. Despite her saying that i was her type during the relationship, this new guy is the polar opposite of me and she’s constantly posting him on social media already even though she never did for me. It was my fault for pushing her away and she seems a lot happier now with me out of her life. What’s your opinion on this? Is it still a rebound even though she’d emotionally checked out and lost feelings a while ago which made it easy to move on? If she ever came back, I only would want to keep her as a friend because I know I was the reason for the breakup, but I still do miss having her around.
Sorry to hear you’re going through a tough. If you only want to keep her as a friend if she reached out, why may i ask are you asking about her rebound?
@@TheLoveFix-Nick I feel really bad for what I put her through and miss having her around but I know at the moment it isn’t possible to be friends because I still have feelings for her. I just want her to come back to me eventually as a friend so I could thank her for everything she’s taught me and to apologise for all my mistakes but I don’t think she’ll ever reach out again when she has someone new. Our relationship wasn’t really that toxic and I feel like I did treat her fairly well, she just fell out of love because of that issue I didn’t fix. It just hurts to see her move on that quickly to someone new and forget about what we had. Maybe I’m only hoping for a friendship because i’m still not over her yet and we’ve been in no contact for a month. But from what I’ve explained, do you believe it is a rebound relationship or something more serious?
@@brianhuynh5828did she come back?
Hey Nick can you make a video about what if the dumper has emotional baggage like has kids or trauma in the past
I’ll see what I can do. 😊
Brilliant!
Thanks Becky. I hope you’re doing well.
My ex left me right away for her long time college best friend. She's 26, and hes 25. I don't know if this relationship will last or fail. Me and my ex were together for 7 years.
Sorry to hear that buddy. Regardless if it will last or not, it’s not worth your energy man. Focus on you. Fact is she’s gone, you’re here and that’s the way it is. You’ll be fine if you do the work. 4 billion women out there man, plenty to choose from.
And? did it last?
Lol. 4 billion to choose from. Unless you don't leave the states. Then it's more like 175 million. Then considering you probably don't want to date someone 2000 miles away, or maybe, you know, in your own town with someone you're attracted to and also get along with, who's also attracted to you and single... Yeah... Not exactly 4 billion
Dude, it’s just example of that everyone has options.