I mean, usually people say "are you a he or a she" when they ask for pronouns which is why nb's would be uncomfy with it. If you were to ask about someones pronouns you shouldnt ask if theyre a he or a she, but ask "what pronouns do you go by" I hope that helped in some way! uwu
True I actually love when people ask my pronouns instead of assuming but I don’t go all crazy on people when they get it wrong I’ll usually just brush it off and ignore them or correct them politely
I have a friend that just finished the medical side of a full mtf transition. I met her about 6 months into hormones and only really knew her as "K"* the grocery store employee with the unisex uniform. Then her and I became better acquainted and i asked her if she would prefer if I used female pronouns as well as her preferred name. "T" was excited and relieved that I asked. I also let her know that between that point up until her surgery, if she ever felt uncomfortable using the women's washroom, I wouldn't think twice to be there for her. I think she has always been a beautiful human being and can finally see the beauty to match what's on the inside. *letters used for privacy.
I mean, all clothes are "unisex" because clothes don't have sex. Everything described as "unisex/fem/masc" is an object that shouldn't be gendered at all. If that's not their reasoning, then idk what else it would be. Even still, I get that it's annoying but people really haven't gotten that far yet. They weirdly haven't fully processed that fact yet so I wouldn't get mad, since it's not common knowledge for many people.
@@TheNoobler Of course clothes are gendered. They are designed for either a male or a female body. If everything is unisex (or whatever word you may use), what are transvestites supposed to do?
@@jeanv1352 No object has gender. Anyone can wear anything. There are sizes that fit male/female bodies better though, that is true. But a skirt isn't a "female clothing item", it's a fabric shaped into a skirt. As for transgender people, they can also wear whatever the hell they want.
@@TheNoobler Sure, everyone can wear whatever the hell the want. That doesn't change the fact that clothes are designed for a specific gender (mostly).
Video: Why is there even male and female sections in clothing stores?! Me: Maybe because people want clothing to fit their bodies and not just be a one size fits all thing? You know, just a thought...
Considering the widely different body types of even just cis women or cis men already is a huge argument for why this divide makes no sense and it would make much more sense to divide clothes by cut/fit. How does for example a cis woman with a very flat chest benefit from a shirt that's cut for larger breasts because that's "what a woman's body is like"? She doesn't. Because it won't fit well in any size. But if she knows where in the store to go for shirts that fit her body type better, she would probably not feel as awful about her body. The same goes for every body type of everyone of any gender. Shopping for clothes would get infinitely more easy if we knew rightaway which section of the store is for our body type, not which section will show us how much we do not fit a certain ideal or alleged average.
"You can be a boy and like flowers, a girl and like cars" - Precisely! And doesn't this undermine the concept of gender-fluidity? If you're a biological male, but identify as gender-fluid because you like flowers, doesn't that reinforce the stereotype that men can't like flowers? I thought we were trying to dismantle stereotypes?
I get what your saying, but nobody identifies as gender fluid/non-binary/whatever just because they like something traditionally feminine/masculine that doesn’t align with the gender they were born as. Gender identity comes from a place of self reflection, what you feel as a person.
@@michace Thank you for your response. Counter point: Surely such self-reflection would ultimately be based on comparing oneself to gender-stereotypes? If not, what is it based on? A side point I would to make: one thing that comes up in many of these debates is the idea that "gender is cultural traits, sex is biology" (or variations along those lines). However, I would argue that this differentiation only really exists in the minds of those immersed in modern (western) gender-politics. To most people, "sex" and "gender" mean pretty much the same thing: the only major difference is that "sex" can also refer to sexual-intercourse, whether as "gender "does not - and personality traits (whether they be stereotypically masculine or feminine) don't really come into it. For example, girls with stereotypically masculine traits were traditionally called "tom boys" - but this was never considered a gender, tom boys were ultimately still seen as girls. Surely its better for people to just be who they want to be regardless of their sex/gender? Surely its better to see gender/sex as simply an irrelevant biological quirk that shouldn't matter? (i.e. like ethnicity). And just to clarify, I'm not trying to offend anyone or undermine anyone's identity here. I am genuinely just trying learn, and I believe the best way of learning for these kinds of topics is for people to challenge each other in civilised debate.
If a child (born female) comes to you and says i feel like a boy.. im transgender.. ask them why and see how deep the conversation gets.. never make a child feel unworthy of understanding.. but challenge them always.. you dont want a generation of snow flakes and people asking you to call them dem/demon/demonself because they identify as a demon ..!
John Brown I guess I don’t think bout the colors since I like wearing darker tones. I think half my closet is black shirts with some kind of gothic design on it
Well if someone is non-binary they cannot be straight… they could be lesbian, or gay, but I’ve usually seen a lot of non-binary people identify as pansexual
@@daffo6264 How could a non-binary person identify as lesbian? Lesbians are people who identify as females who are attracted to other females. Non-binary people don’t identify as females. And from my understanding, being gay as a non-binary person sounds like they’re exclusively only attracted to other non-binary people since being gay is being attracted to the same gender. Am I understanding that correctly?
@@skylargray5642 Well somewhat, it is complicated, lesbian could be used as a word to mean a female liking another female, but I’ve also seen actual nb people go by lesbian/gay
I think "gay" is used as an umbrella term for being in the LGBTQ+ community as well? I've been asked that question before and I was a bit baffled but then the person explained that they were just asking if I was in the community lol
Ah actually, I'm a scientist. My gender is taking quick notes and muttering "hm... interesting... I must tell the academy at once." What's in my pants? Potassium Permanganate (ouch)
Totally true, and you don't even need to call yourself non binary, you can just continue on with your day, doing what you do and not giving a shit what others think
@@Nozrhul Well, that's what I want to do. But I suffer from gender dysphoria if I'm seen as Male or female. So, I identify as Non-binary which gives me gender euphoria and try to live my life. But people keep stopping me and making who I am political or whatever. I just want to live my life.
My identity has nothing to do with stereotypes or anything. But people make me feel like I'm faking my identity if I'm not acting perfectly within those stereotypes!
It's a counter-culture thing. The people in the video have to convince themselves that they are attacked by the whole of the society to justify their self-centeredness. The fact of the matter is the vast majority does not pay attention to the subtleties discussed in the video, if they see a man with tiddies in the streets people are just confused at best.
I have genuine question that I'm confused about... If you don't identify as male or female how can you identify as being gay? Because generally speaking homosexual means attracted to the same sex so I'm confused because your non binary
I agree with ^ I indentify as non binary, and i am pansexual, even though i scream "im gay" all the time. Gay is more used as just having a sexuality other then hetrosexual like bi or pan, so basically non binary people being homosexual is i guess only liking other non binaries? Im not sure but i hope this kind of helped :D ♡
As someone in the LGBT category. The way I look at it is that either A) Gender and sexuality are different topics entirely. B) If you are Non-binary/Gener Fluid, etc, you would come under demisexual or pansexual.
Being someone who's nonbinary, I can promise you most of us genuinely don't mind questions in real life lmao. I don't get why these folks are so dramatic over the questions- sometimes people get curious, nothing wrong with that
@@sammccreath7641 Why? Maybe the problem is them? Maybe they shouldn't feel like the world owes them anything? Like A.M said they are not special, they just want to be. I feel sad for them.
@@sammccreath7641 But you don't want equality. You want to be special. Equality means you will have to take crap just like every other person on the planet. Yes everyone deserves to be treated with respect but some of these aren't rude questions but now those asking the questions are being treated like stupid. Respect you say? Respect is earned as well and when you start off with the attitude these people displayed what do they expect from people? To act as if you are better and more special than others is one sure way to get treated differently and what would happen if the person respectfully states that they don't agree with this lifestyle? They get branded and lambasted as transphobic when it's just something that they don't agree with. Respect goes both ways.
@@sammccreath7641 you say you want equality and you dont have it yet. What equalities have been given to others and not you or this group? Genuinely curious but I will say that these individuals dress to stick out like a sore thumb and that might not help when you walk about in public. This video is full of people that look like goofballs and that would definitely cause people to ask questions. Also never heard a generation talk about genitals soooo much in my life.
@@sammccreath7641 that's hard to do because I have asked questions in the most polite way and people have taken offense to it. I literally asked an associate of mine that is Trans due to being worried about starting a conversation with a fellow human "How should I approach someone that I'm not sure of their preference? Should I slowly talk and get into what do they identify as? " And he got offended I didnt know when I honestly didn't in this situation. Kind of ruined our relation because I remember when I met my associate years ago it was just natural and we were cool. Now I can almost feel the stigma of individuals feeling as if I'm automatically going to offend them on purpose. The vibes are like walking on eggshells. Years ago seemed people didn't care about preferences at all. I remember him asking me a few years back if I was gay and I simply said no and took no offense. Just find it ridiculous that now for some reason some of the first conversations you have with someone is trying to find out their preference so you don't offend them. When it shouldn't be that way. We should be able to talk naturally and bond without having to even worry about personal preferences. I mean at the end of the day it's a personal preference so why isn't staying personal during the beginning stages of introduction? Not saying that in a way of dont ask dont tell but in a true world of equality you naturally just talk to people and bond not caring about anything that is visible. I have had conversations with homeless individuals that no one will approach eveb individuals apart of the LGBTQ community because their visible appearance and they were the best conversations I have ever had. I don't think many understand the actual meaning of equality.
@@gr1mreap3rz15 how does one be outside of the gender binary?? genuine question, not even intersex people are outside of the gender binary, they are somewhere in between
@A M. dude you have no clue how often I get asked if im a boy or a girl, if im trans, and then if I answer, what my genitals are/if ive had surgeries. you say we are fixated on our sex, and yeah, thats probably true! wanna know why? because we spend every day in a body that feels Wrong. most days I cannot even pinpoint why, exactly, but my body feels wrong all the time. like it isn't mine. like it's some mask or suit im wearing. except I cant take it off. and every day, no matter how hard I try to cover it up or change it, people see the suit im wearing and assume thats the gender I am. do you know how painful that is? so, yeah, maybe we are obsessed with our genitalia. because we have the wrong ones. and im sure if you were in that position, you would want to try and get rid of that suit to the best of your ability, too. for some its literally a matter of life and death. I know personally I was once so depressed from my dysphoria I seriously considered killing myself because transitioning is so difficult and so expensive. shits tough, and you aren't making it any easier
A M. I’m not fixated on my sex so I’m not sure what your talking about. We get surgery and make fake dicks because it makes us feel less dysphoric. Judging my that comment I’m going to assume you don’t keno what dysphoria is (I’m really really sorry if I you do know what dysphoria is and I guessed incorrectly) so I’m going to explain it to you. Dysphoria happens when you are born in the wrong body. Imagine if you were born with boobs (or without if your female) it would feel wrong right? Like something is missing/attached to you that’s not supposed to be. That why we get surgeries to get rid of something that’s not supposed to be there or to add something that’s supposed to be there. It’s like if you had a bump on your leg, it didn’t harm you but it was big, annoying, and it made you didn’t like the bump, especially when people noticed it. You would get it removed right? That way you would feel more comfortable in your body. The same goes for surgeries to change genitals, it’s to make you feel more comfortable in your own body. I hope I explained this well! Have a good day!
@TheWonderWoman2005 "Then why not advertise the clothing as having a certain shape instead of a gender. Its just fabric" Because the majority of people on the planet identify as male or female. If you don't like that, tough luck.
As a cis man with very wide shoulder who frequently shops in the women's section of clothing stores, most clothes, if large enough, will fit you without much problem regardless of gender
@Tarot Tune Up Most of the time when society mostly goes one way, it is the right way. Most people view murder as bad. Most people view racism as bad. Are they actually bad? Yes. The whole point is gender is determined by dna, you don't pick. The only things that should be identifying as genderfluid are the actual living organisms with male and female organs.
@Tarot Tune Up The Majority would mind their business if the minority would stop acting oppressed and act like they need everything to be changed for them. Literally they changed how we do our graduation gowns at my school because the non-binary students can't stop crying about everything. Chick literally just said clothes should be changed to shape instead of gender. Literally watched a girl complaining about how doctors are rude for assigning them genders. It's not the doctor, it's your dna. What's next.
Tarot Tune Up It’s hard to mind your business when these people literally are going everywhere trying to change everything. My school has had to change so many things because of their crying.
Unisex is a word that means any gender can wear it. But they're saying that if you enter a clothing store it shouldn't be male clothes, girl clothes, it's just meant to be clothes I want to wear not what you define as feminine or masculine wear.
My issue with this is mainly their attitudes. They’re being so condescending when this topic is actually very confusing and there are so many contradictions that people outside of this community don’t understand. So to be told we essentially can’t ask any questions to understand it we should just know certain things is extremely frustrating.
When we tell people who are cis about it they just make fun of us and think it's funny or cool to be transphobic so I dont see why most of the time we should just be nice and over the moon when people are transphobic towards a whole group of people they know nothing about at all
Well sometimes you don't really have to know everything about a person. Just because you don't understand something doesn't mean you have to question people on things like their genitalia. (kill me if I'm wrong if so iam very sorry)
The problem is that these people (not all of them) get super angry when you dont understand it. Thats the reason we ask, because we dont understand *but we want to* . How are we supposed to understand you if you get all angry and defensive when we try to??
Lena with a Box there is biological sex, which is assigned at birth, gender is they portrayal of that, you can portray gender in any way, a non binary person can feel boyish and girly at the same time, and trans persons biological sex doesn’t match with their gender, so they change their gender, hope this helps! Ask questions
@@vivamalcarney6205 uh, yeah. What is the difference between a non binary person and like, a tomboy? i know there is a major one, but i never really got it... Thanks for answering my questions btw
from what i can tell just from this video. the difference between a tomboy and non binary is non binary seem to care what u call them and a tomboy doesnt really care they just want to live life.
The difference between a tomboy and a non-binary person is expression; the way someone looks: masculine, feminine androgynous, or a mix of that. The way someone expresses there gender isn't the same as being any certain gender. A tomboy is someone who dresses masculine and identifies as a woman, and a non-binary person identifies with not being male or female. How masculine or feminine you dress doesn't affect what your genders is, and plenty of non-binary people dress masculine, plenty dress feminine, and there are a lot of people who dress kind of in the middle of gender(androgynous).
Lena with a Box. Yeah I mean I don’t get offended when people ask because they’re just questions i use (she/her. And they/them pronouns) and I like that people ask questions and I’ll happily explain to them and people who ask what gender I was born don’t offend me either I just explain what I was born and how I feel about myself honestly so long as they ask politely I’m glad they ask it’s better than them not understanding
About the pronoun question..... please don't be angry if we ask what to call you, politely of course. There are some of us confused folks out here who may not understand, like me, but really do want to learn. We are ALL human beings after all, stuck on this rock together.
Honestly there is no reason for someone to get mad at you for asking. To me it’s the best thing cause I know that person doesn’t want me to feel uncomfortable
I understand what you're saying, but the non-binary people get questions on the daily about that. They start to get annoyed when they get that question every day, even if it's being asked politely. Sorry if I sound rude, and I understand where you're coming from, just think about how many times they get asked that daily. Oof sorry, and have a good dayy
Yes you can ask!! Unless its a situation where you wouldnt have needed to know their pronouns. So if you are a friend, coworker, acquaintance, etc. thats totally ok to ask. If you walk up to someone where you wouldnt have been talking to them or referring to them its rude because it might be a question they have to answer over and over and you are basically saying 'im a random person who will never refer to you again I just really needed to know what you are'. Also heads up, 99% of the time they are a binary /cis person would will be pretty confused/hurt by the question.
Maybe not ask sensitive questions in an inappropriate setting to a complete stranger? There are plenty of proper places, online or in person to learn about the lgbt community. If you really must ask that trans /genderqueer colleague of yours, maybe ask their permission to have a private lecture first? But as i said, its a very sensitive topic especially for the trans/genderqueer person in question.
Daniel Sniderman how do you not know how many there are. That's when you know what your saying isn't real. Mmmm idk how many types of water there are... maybe there is 57!!!!
@Daniel Sniderman "fuck biology I have a brain" is possibly the dumbest think I've ever read. Fuck the arguments idc about genders but you are stupid as shit
This video isn't exactly serious advice of what not to say. It really just means try to phrase questions non offensively if you're confused. I understand that there's the whole "this generations will be offended by everything" but if you preface things with "I'm not tryna be offensive but" it should go a bit better
Exactly, whilst I totally agree with people’s right to identify as whatever they like and be whoever they want to be, it’s not fair to abuse those who don’t agree with you. Unfortunately you have to accept that people aren’t going to understand and aren’t going to share the same opinions. Too many of us feel so self entitled that we demand that everyone agrees with us. As soon as someone doesnt share the same beliefs they are labelled as transphobic, should lose their job and recieve abuse. Such as in the case of cancel culture. You can’t be liberal if you want to silence people who don’t agree with you. There are lovely individuals who are non-binary but most of these people in the clip seem ignorant and their attitude is so off putting.
Yes, thank you. Why does asking and trying to understand make you a bigot? Why cant we just assume that people arent bigots and work from there. Why cant we just assume that people are genuinely trying to have an open conversation and understand you rather than trying to upset you? People have debated for millennia, politics, philosophy, ethics, religion, why cant we just talk about these things without assuming every question someone asks you is a personal attack? How can I learn if I cant ask questions. How can I learn if the answer to all my questions is "oh god you are so close minded." Like they throw their arms up when the statement came up "I dont get it" and shout "well learn!" But I've literally learnt nothing from any of the answers they have given to all that great list of questions presented to them literally. Nothing. Apart from apparently in India there is a third gender? Which wasnt explained any further just slapped on the table like it's a well known fact. These things clearly arent well known or more people would understand the third gender no gender thing, so maby they should talk about it and then more people will know. Rather than throw their hands up and act like all these things are so obvious everyone should know. But then the people who are asking to whom it is not obvious and of whom there are clearly a lot because these questions are apparently so common, learn nothing and come away hurt because theyve been called a bigot for not understanding something that noone will explain to them.
@@machfassett5749 That's true, I can get that because, sure you may be curious but it's a very personal and private thing where only in a very close relationship I would personally share.
I was mainly upset about the part were they got upset about people asking what there’re pronouns are like I don’t feel that that’s a rude thing to ask I’d see it as a sign of respect and it’s not like people can just automatically know someone’s pronouns that’s to me what it sounds like they’re saying that people should just know they’re pronouns
@@laurajholmes Its like if I use the wrong pronouns then you get mad but if I ask you what your pronouns are to make sure I'm being respectful then it also makes you mad..? I'm sure it can get annoying at times if someone forgets or something but I mean its still a relatively new thing to use more that 2 types of pronouns so you have to understand.
I feel like this video really didn't portray non binary people in a good light. As a nonbinary person, I'm never upset if someone asks my pronouns. I personally don't mind if people ask me questions about it. People have to learn about it somehow, right? We should educate whenever possible.
Language evolves with the way people use it over time and the words sex and gender are not perfect synonyms in every context. People begin using new terminology when the existing terminology is not sufficient to explain what they mean.
I do know some women who occasionally wear men's clothing (primarily t-shirts), but men most the time cant do the same... a fit male has a much larger body (not to say a guy couldn't find a larger size, but generally female clothing is made to fit in a specific way while male clothing is pretty basic and universal)
Nikki then wear men's clothing because you have no femininity to flaunt. Men wear men's clothing whether they are pear shaped or fit as a fiddle. This doesn't change that men and women have different bodies, just that yours is inadequate and cannot be marketed as something healthy and attractive. Don't try to pass that off an argument for unisex clothing.
Who are you trying to convince? I prefer hourglass, as do many hot blooded men. There's a difference between child-bearing hips and a pear shaped fatty.
They are not opressed and that's nice. Truly opressed people, like gays and lesbians in my country, need desperately people to listen and make questions, so they can answer and build understanding. Truly opressed people are happy when they even have an opportunity to fight.
"I don't understand?" "Then learn!" How are we supposed to learn if you say don't ask questions. And more specifically the questions we would need to ask in a hope to be respectful.
Well, actually, there are a lot of way to learn without ask questions to non-binary persons. Like, for example, there is internet. And then, i know it could seem weird to say "I don't want to answer your questions, learn alone", but a lot of non-binary/transgender people answer questions all the day, all the week. And it is just really unconfortable and tiring, because it's everytime, and because they feel like they need to justify their existence - which is really hurtfull. It's why they ask you " stop asking". For them it means "let me live my life without ask me to justify my existence".
99% of non binary and trans people I know are very open to questions, as long as they aren't obviously meant to be antagonizing. At the same time, it is not our job to educate you. You can easily do your own research.
I assume, but virtue of you being able to write RUclips comments, that you are, in fact, not a toddler. Therefore, I trust you can use Google. That said, I personally don't mind questions, so long as they're not rude or invasive.
It’s not their job to educate you though, and half of the questions you ask (if you ask the same kind of questions portrayed in the video) are just rude or intrusive. If you’re truly curious, search it up. The internet exists.
It's usually not specifically "what's in your pants?" It usually shows up as the question, "so have you had any surgeries yet?" Because they're trying really hard to be subtle
it's kind of dumb and outdated for the most part. It's a very outdated way of looking at gender that if something is 'for men' and 'for women' it's 'unisex'. Things don't need to be targeted at a specific gender. People can just wear what they want. Hope this helped :)
Someone saying he or she is non-binary is just like a black or white person saying he doesn't have a colour. Imagine me a black saying I identify as a white😂
Different body shapes doesn't mean you can't make a dress for someone with a male body. It's more the separation of styles rather than the specific cut of the material
@billie stan 1. How would you know? Unless you're a mind reader you never know who wants to do what because people can lie about it easily. And two, just because they don't want to wear pink dresses doesn't mean they can't wear something else typically feminine, like high waisted jeans or a skirt
@A M. these people have been through hell. There's lives have been turn to shreds by people like you. People can't just accept them but have to take time out their day to make them feel worse. Your a dick is what im saying.
Me too, I'm not gonna participate in their word games. These kind of ppl tend to be really toxic. I consider ppl describing themselves as non-binary to be mentally ill. Madness has gone way too far by now.
Judging from your profile pic I don't think you are being dishonest, but genuinely didn't understand, so let's take a step back; Society has and reinforces gender stereotypes and roles, that bears little or none at all biological reasons, so they shouldn't matter nor define you, literally quoting the video: ''you can be a boy and you can like flowers, you can be a girl and you can like cars'', but we have a context in which, in the first case, you are a boy liking a female thing, and sure, there are patterns, but the concept non-binary people have, is to not have a strict separation between genders(male and female), but rather a spectrum, and it's a misconstruction on your part that they define themselves as non-binary because they like both, flowers and cars, this would be just another restriction, gender is more complex, it's based on experiences, how you are perceived and perceive yourself, how you relate to other and other relates to you, and being on the extreme of that spectrum for some it's limiting that understanding. Even sex is more complex than memes might let you think and it's not so strictly binary either, been both part of sexuality, it might relate to gender in different ways, but they are distinct. Some non-binary people partly or completely disassociates with the assigned gender at birth due to experiencing social and/or physical gender dysphoria to varying degree, others might be more gender non-conforming.
@@ゝへY But what he's trying to say is...here is this group that tries to associate themselves as not really having a traditional label of how to identify themselves...while somehow at the same time...extremely particular about what labels they'd actually like to be called. I can't wrap my head around it..which is fine...however, I don't think it's fair to get angry at me when I'm actually trying to understand how to just...talk to you.
tiffany I read your reply with interest because I'm a liberal who thinks non binary is just one step too far. I do think it's a fashion thing. I'm trying to understand.
There is a men's and women's section in stores, because women's clothing has much more space in the chest and hips, and men's clothing is more boxy, wider at the shoulders, and longer, and just bigger in general. So it's not necessarily as much of a gender stereotyping thing all of the time, but there are female builds, and male builds, and they are very different when it comes to shapes and sizes.
Also remember that there are also junior sections, girls, and boys. It's all about the shape of your body! Imagine having to be a girl, and buying men's jeans. It would be so much harder to find clothes that fit your style and body shape/type. I don't care where you shop, but I personally think it would be a bad idea to combine men and women's clothing sections.
To be honest I take a little from both sides. Usually jeans and stuff from the men's section, and whichever tshirt has the coolest design. I find that the main difference is whether or not an item of clothing has pockets.
Really? Some women buy men's clothing because it fits better, it tends to be made better and more sturdy, or they like the style. Your premise that there is a "female build" and a "male build" doesn't fly in every case.
@@claudianess1464 I'm not saying that if you are female you have to shop in the female section, vise versa. I buy things from the men's section sometimes. But I'm saying that the majority would not like that. Because men's clothing is designed and shaped so differently from women's clothing. Yes, everyone has a different body shape. But if you have fairly large breasts, and buying a men's shirt, most of the time you're either buying a shirt that fits right everywhere, except the chest, or a shirt that fits right at the chest, but not anywhere else. All I'm saying is it's a lot easier for someone who is nonbinary to look in either section, than for everyone else try to find things they like in one.
Actually it means you're attracted to the same SEX. Not gender. That's the biggest misunderstanding. If you were attracted to the gender, you would be attracted to a MASCULINE/FEMININE person (and the sex wouldn't matter). But if you're a woman, and you like men, you might be attracted to a very very andro/masculine woman but in the end it wouldn't work because you like men (and penises I guess ?) and you wouldn't be sexually compatible.
I don’t like it when they act rude about the questions some people may ask. Like the He or She part. It’s an honest question where people are trying to make sure they don’t offend you. You shouldn’t make people feel shit for asking question and trying to understand you. That would just make them have negative assumptions about all non binary people in the future.
It's more of the phrasing of it than the actual question itself. If someone said, "What pronouns do you use?" Its easier to answer than, "Do you use he or she?" because its more open and not giving you options that you have to choose from.
"you can be a boy and like flowers, you can be a girl and like cars." YES! THERE YOU GO! So no need for non binairy terms that no one understands and you can't explain.
Seems kind of ridiculous to be offended when people don’t immediately understand your personal situation regardless of whatever that may be. I mean, feel free to educate us but don’t get pissed because we can’t immediately identify with your world view. And it’s natural to be curious about stuff you’ve never been exposed to. That’s how we learn.
I agree. I am exploring my femininity right now. I want to answer more questions to affirm my identity. As long as it is respectful I have no issues with that.
"is it he or. She or they or what" How am i suppised to adress you by your prefered pronoun if i am not allowed to ask. And then throwing a tantrum when its wrong geez
@@lenap319 yeah, that's perfect! It's just when people act like it's a drag or a huge responsibility to ask or use the right pronouns that it starts to go south, for the most part the majority of LGBT people who has a different pronoun will be fine if you're just respectful about it
@@alexlaw236 yeah, i never met a nonbinary or trans person, so i never acvidentaly misgendered one. I assumed that (same is in fandoms and such) theres a vocal minority that gets realy offemded if you accidentaly say the wrong ponoun (even if you apologize and correct yourself right after). But i figure thats just a small lart of the comunity. (also im bisexual and most of my friends are bi or gay. I just dont really associate with the nb part, because where i live theres no or just little nb and trans people)
@@lenap319 yeah, there is a minority of really *really* offended trans, NB, ect. people and thats all you really see and all that people really think about... Also like all of my friends turned out to be NB or trans (I'm genderfluid) and some of them get really self conscious about pronouns but that's about it, as long as your respectful most good people will forgive you. Hell, my best friend went three months without telling me his preferred name and to use her/him pronouns
@Mabel Willianson Alright well, I do know that there is only two genders so I am confused about that? The only thing I did in comment was mock what that person said, because that is just ridiculous from my point of view.
@Mabel Willianson Well, I'm sorry that I haven't really made my point. What I wanted to say is basically that, in my point of view, I believe that no one would shout that in public. But yeah, I know that I'm wrong, it would basically be the same to say that someone believes that no one would die from idk, fever or cold, yet it happens. And damn that feels bad to hear, hope those bullies regret it :v
Presumably it's ok to ask, "Why should anyone else care about how you perceive yourselves?" Because, people will perceive you as whatever they want, no matter what you want.
@Spawn of The Lavender Menace If you want to be 'kind' to a person, do NOT enable him/her in such delusions. It's like inviting an alcoholic to split a bottle of whisky instead of getting him into detox.
@@ernsttrekiew198 i don't think the alchoholic would think that was very kind. + these ppl are just ppl at the end of the day so you can't expect them to answer everything with a perfect answer. like imagine i had to explain why i'm straight every single day. i would prob get angry too and i'm not even sure i would have an answer for them let alone a perfect one
@@billieeyelashhh4613 science does label us, if I'm not wrong we have chromosomes that depict our gender, so saying that science doesn't label us is utter bullshit.
@@user-it4qo8qs6h actually the chromosomes define your gametes your genitalia and secondary characteristics linked to your hormonal production...not your gender (which can be in harmony or not with you assigned sex and is completely free from hormonal control caused by your chromosomes...gender is in the head and can cause dysphoria if not in harmony with the sex you are born with ) Because if you take things like that we could also say that it defines your sexuality and attraction because of how reproduction works...but we know it's not the case...just like your sex doesn't define your sexuality it also doesn't define wether or not you feel comfortable about your female or male body/ body parts...otherwise dysphoria wouldn't exist...as a transgender for example you are completely dysphoric with your body being the one of the opposite sex....as a genderqueer you could also experience dysphoria but only on things that are specific to yourself or/and only at certains times or not at all and not minding being one or another (like at this moment i wouldn't mind being a male just like i don't mind being a female)...for example you could experience dysphoria about your body hair but not at all about your genitalia....or one day being proud and happy about your female body (breasts,curves and all) and the day after feeling like you are not supposed to have breasts (or be better without them) and think your body is supposed to be more male looking (and Feel extremely bad and confused about it).... Our specie is known for not being a slave to it's genetic and hormones ...because our really complex brain (and big amount of grey and white matter) takes over hormonal control.....it's also why we are unable To differenciate a male brain to female's in terms of how they use it....all people are a mosaic of different neurological paths. And gender is a part of the mosaic and is specific To each individuals.
I'm all for people doing what they want with their own life but people who identify as non binary, do not get mad when people call you he or she unless you explain to them. You can't just assume people will know you're non binary or that they even know what that means. That's the only thing I've seen personally that bothers me.
Shyla Saunders I think these people are not being very understanding. there are so many of us (including me) who are simply curious about this topic and might ask some of these questions in a respectful manner and dont mean any harm. some of us simply want to learn because we aren't educated well enough on this topic. I don't think we are expected to be educated on this either. there are so many things in the world and it's like everyone's expected to know everything about our society right now but that's simply impossible. I didn't even know what non binary meant before the video started. but now I do. and it is OKAY that I didn't know. I simply hadn't been taught before, and now I have. I believe that someone simply asking a question (to someone they know, maybe not just a stranger on the street throwing accusations) but if you are asking in a respectful manner, then these people should answer! they are so upset that we don't know these things, yet we haven't been given answers, so answer us!! don't judge us for not knowing.
Shyla Saunders I'm non-binary and whenever someone calls me "she" or "her" I just kindly tell them "I prefer they/them better." I kindly tell them again if they forget. But when someone knows and is calling me a "she" on purpose that makes me mad. (But I'm too shy to say anything)
Maddie; no, it is the "non-binaries" who are not being understanding or tollerant. If you consider yourself a different gender that the only two known to all human kind ....and expect the rest of humanity to instantly understand and know all the "other" genders - don't get upset or demanding.
Maddie okay exactly! If you want me to use your pronouns, tell me your pronouns. Don't just think I'll know them. And at that point, don't be upset with me about it, if I didn't know! That just makes things more difficult for both me and you. It's so annoying to be in fear of upsetting someone because they assume I know they're non binary.
Thomas Korn if you read my comment correctly, I said if someone KNOWS I'm nonbinary and says "she" or "her" on purpose just to piss me off or annoy me, that annoys me. But if someone doesn't know I just kindly tell them "I prefer they/them better"
I think that asking if it is she or he or them is a good thing if you say it in the right way. People just dont know how to call you and they dont want to misgender you
A person in my art class was like "they're are only 2 genders" then this other person said "i can name 7! Gay, straight, lesbian, bi-" *THOSE ARE SEXUALITIES!!!! THERE IS A BIG DIFFERENCE!!!!!*
Mystíe :3 How do you know they’re being transphobic? Jana (OP) may not have meant all transgender people are too easily offended, maybe Jana was using “They” as a pronoun to talk about specific person in this video. Maybe your the one being transphobic, how dare you assume he was talking about more than one person just because the word “They” was used.
Says she or him *gets offended* Asks what their pronouns are *gets offended* Like, I’m sorry I don’t know what you are, but don’t need to get so offended if I can’t tell and just met you
e x a c t l y. 👏 i hate this part of the nb/genderfluid community that gets offended by everything and feel so progressive and cool for it. like damn...
Their reactions to the questions just makes anyone like this come across as "confrontational" and rather unapproachable especially if they have unhealed trauma! which we all have to heal through our lives!)
Most of these questions aren't even rude. They say that you should "learn", but when you ask a question that may help you understand the concept they get really defensive. Nb people should be more open to questions.
but people are going to question it because its not normal, and they are just being polite and trying to understand and these people get annoyed, well its better than getting stoned to death like in other places of the world atleast these people are willing to accept them rather than actually discriminate or be mean to them. They could just accept that they are different and be happy that people are still willing to accept them but they need a little information first. They shouldn't get annoyed about it, its kinda a new thing so they should be happy to explain and let everyone know what they are so they understand. to expect people to understand from the get go is just ignorant and they themselves should be more open. Just my take on it anyway.
CMX_ but it's not really like that? Trust me, I get a lot of questions every day about who I am and why that is, being a bisexual punk dude, and I answer them politely, because I want people to understand it better. Being asked stuff like "well how gay are you" and "well since you're punk you must be a criminal right" is annoying, yes, but I want people to understand the world and see things from toher perspectives, so I answer them. If you're sensitive to being questioned, you shouldn't stand out. It's not the wise thing to do if you want to live your life without being asked questions.
Skyler I think these people are not being very understanding. there are so many of us (including me) who are simply curious about this topic and might ask some of these questions in a respectful manner and dont mean any harm. some of us simply want to learn because we aren't educated well enough on this topic. I don't think we are expected to be educated on this either. there are so many things in the world and it's like everyone's expected to know everything about our society right now but that's simply impossible. I didn't even know what non binary meant before the video started. but now I do. and it is OKAY that I didn't know. I simply hadn't been taught before, and now I have. I believe that someone simply asking a question (to someone they know, maybe not just a stranger on the street throwing accusations) but if you are asking in a respectful manner, then these people should answer! they are so upset that we don't know these things, yet we haven't been given answers, so answer us!! don't judge us for not knowing.
TheCrap what’s stupid about clothes fitting to your body? If you want you can wear clothes fitted for a male body. They are just bigger because men tend to be bigger than women.
Yep. Which sucks, because I have zero boobage and, like, Shakira hips. There is a grand total of zero dresses that fit my hips and don't make me look like a walking square.
These "Things not to say.." videos send such a wrong message. I mean of course you shouldn't insult or discriminate against people but sometimes there are genuine questions on the list that weren't meant in a bad way. They may sound dumb to people that are familiar with the situation but it is stupid to say "You are rude if you ask these questions." Just answer the question and be happy that people are genuinely interested in you and want to learn :)
This is how people react. Sometimes these people mean it harmlessly, and sometimes not, and the group that they have for that video addresses that. If anything, this video helps us understand how the people on the receiving end of these questions feel, and how not to do that.
Enna Whitehorse Ah. So there willing for others to have bad feelings like being uncomfortable and anxious. So that they don’t have the same feelings? Perfect logic.
In the Philippines, we have people who are called bakla, people assigned male at birth who mostly have a feminine gender expression, and tomboys who are the other way around. They are seen as a third gender and they have existed even since pre-colonial times. The Filipino language itself is mostly gender neutral when it comes to pronouns: we mostly use "siya" when indicating the third person. What I'm saying is gender is fluid. Non-binary or genderfluid people have always existed and are part of our society and of course should be respected. Although it might be a struggle for many people in the beginning for people in the English-speaking world or any other language that uses two or more pronouns. But, respecting and accepting these people who identify in between is one step forward for humanity.
why is it rude to ask someone their pronouns so you don't call them the wrong thing I don't understand
It isn’t rude, it’s actually quite polite
I mean, usually people say "are you a he or a she" when they ask for pronouns which is why nb's would be uncomfy with it. If you were to ask about someones pronouns you shouldnt ask if theyre a he or a she, but ask "what pronouns do you go by"
I hope that helped in some way! uwu
It's rude to say specifically boy or girl because like what are you supposed to say "all of the above"?
@@imherewaitnoimhere9401 yeah!
@@gink_ie I've said that before actually I said it to a transphobe
Asking pronouns is not offensive
Did you just misgender my pronouns?
saying "he or she" is shitty though
True I actually love when people ask my pronouns instead of assuming but I don’t go all crazy on people when they get it wrong I’ll usually just brush it off and ignore them or correct them politely
I have a friend that just finished the medical side of a full mtf transition. I met her about 6 months into hormones and only really knew her as "K"* the grocery store employee with the unisex uniform. Then her and I became better acquainted and i asked her if she would prefer if I used female pronouns as well as her preferred name. "T" was excited and relieved that I asked. I also let her know that between that point up until her surgery, if she ever felt uncomfortable using the women's washroom, I wouldn't think twice to be there for her. I think she has always been a beautiful human being and can finally see the beauty to match what's on the inside.
*letters used for privacy.
Georgia Mitchell to some people it is because they’re rude or they’re a tumblrina
"were you born a man or a woman"
i was born an inconvenience
Y E S, SAME
That's literally what the people in the video should have been saying
i was born a disappointment
I was born as
A worm on a string
I was born as cheese.
I've come back to this video a handful of times over the years and I still have no idea what could possibly be so wrong with the word 'unisex'.
I mean, all clothes are "unisex" because clothes don't have sex. Everything described as "unisex/fem/masc" is an object that shouldn't be gendered at all. If that's not their reasoning, then idk what else it would be. Even still, I get that it's annoying but people really haven't gotten that far yet. They weirdly haven't fully processed that fact yet so I wouldn't get mad, since it's not common knowledge for many people.
@@TheNoobler Of course clothes are gendered. They are designed for either a male or a female body. If everything is unisex (or whatever word you may use), what are transvestites supposed to do?
@@jeanv1352 No object has gender. Anyone can wear anything. There are sizes that fit male/female bodies better though, that is true. But a skirt isn't a "female clothing item", it's a fabric shaped into a skirt. As for transgender people, they can also wear whatever the hell they want.
@@TheNoobler Sure, everyone can wear whatever the hell the want. That doesn't change the fact that clothes are designed for a specific gender (mostly).
@@jeanv1352 Yes, they currently are still designed for genders. I already said everything I had to say on it.
“Were you born a man or woman?”
I spawned into this world out of pure rage.
The child of Rak Kultesh
Hello genderfluid flag profile person, I have a pansexual backround
@Mia Young thx so much
@@drwilsonstoenailpolish3194 hi i'm pan too ^^
@@lilzlilzlilzlilzlilzlilzli3992 hieee
Video: Why is there even male and female sections in clothing stores?!
Me: Maybe because people want clothing to fit their bodies and not just be a one size fits all thing? You know, just a thought...
Jimmy IsABird shut the fuck up jimmy
Jimmy IsABird shut the fuck up jimmy
Jimmy IsABird . Women's clothing has much more space in the chest and hips but the waist , leg length and with are small compared to the chest.
when anyone displays a point for you to deny it is the utmost childish thing ive seen all year
Considering the widely different body types of even just cis women or cis men already is a huge argument for why this divide makes no sense and it would make much more sense to divide clothes by cut/fit. How does for example a cis woman with a very flat chest benefit from a shirt that's cut for larger breasts because that's "what a woman's body is like"? She doesn't. Because it won't fit well in any size. But if she knows where in the store to go for shirts that fit her body type better, she would probably not feel as awful about her body. The same goes for every body type of everyone of any gender. Shopping for clothes would get infinitely more easy if we knew rightaway which section of the store is for our body type, not which section will show us how much we do not fit a certain ideal or alleged average.
i am not male or female, i am swag.
*Mood*
I am not male or female.
*I identify as a microwave*
how much swag do you have
the only valid comment
People call me nuts
"You can be a boy and like flowers, a girl and like cars" - Precisely! And doesn't this undermine the concept of gender-fluidity? If you're a biological male, but identify as gender-fluid because you like flowers, doesn't that reinforce the stereotype that men can't like flowers? I thought we were trying to dismantle stereotypes?
I was thinking about this too. Liking flowers doesn’t undermine your gender.
I get what your saying, but nobody identifies as gender fluid/non-binary/whatever just because they like something traditionally feminine/masculine that doesn’t align with the gender they were born as. Gender identity comes from a place of self reflection, what you feel as a person.
@@michace Thank you for your response.
Counter point: Surely such self-reflection would ultimately be based on comparing oneself to gender-stereotypes? If not, what is it based on?
A side point I would to make: one thing that comes up in many of these debates is the idea that "gender is cultural traits, sex is biology" (or variations along those lines). However, I would argue that this differentiation only really exists in the minds of those immersed in modern (western) gender-politics. To most people, "sex" and "gender" mean pretty much the same thing: the only major difference is that "sex" can also refer to sexual-intercourse, whether as "gender "does not - and personality traits (whether they be stereotypically masculine or feminine) don't really come into it. For example, girls with stereotypically masculine traits were traditionally called "tom boys" - but this was never considered a gender, tom boys were ultimately still seen as girls.
Surely its better for people to just be who they want to be regardless of their sex/gender? Surely its better to see gender/sex as simply an irrelevant biological quirk that shouldn't matter? (i.e. like ethnicity).
And just to clarify, I'm not trying to offend anyone or undermine anyone's identity here. I am genuinely just trying learn, and I believe the best way of learning for these kinds of topics is for people to challenge each other in civilised debate.
STOP TALKING SENSE! You'll never get a job at the BBC with that attitude!
If a child (born female) comes to you and says i feel like a boy.. im transgender.. ask them why and see how deep the conversation gets.. never make a child feel unworthy of understanding.. but challenge them always.. you dont want a generation of snow flakes and people asking you to call them dem/demon/demonself because they identify as a demon ..!
Rather shop in the ‘male’ section cause the pants have pockets, shorts are longer, and the T-shirt’s have sleeves.
I shop pretty much all over the store. My hips are more narrow than an average woman and wider than an average man so it's gonna be a hunt anyway.
NightAngelus vary true
I shop in the females section cause they have pleasant colors. Relaxing...
John Brown I guess I don’t think bout the colors since I like wearing darker tones. I think half my closet is black shirts with some kind of gothic design on it
I agreeee
How does a non binary samurai kill people?
They/them
Thats a good one
That's a good one!
I dont get it
Took me a bit.
@@smokeymcbongwater the / symbole is called slash. so they slash them.
"are you a girl or a boy?"
"a trash can"
"what's in your pants?"
"disappointment"
from now on i’m using this-
"Are you gay"
All of them: Yes
Someone please explain to me what being gay as a non-binary person even means...
Not all of them answered and the person with coloured hair didn't say their sexuality is defined as 'gay'.
Well if someone is non-binary they cannot be straight… they could be lesbian, or gay, but I’ve usually seen a lot of non-binary people identify as pansexual
@@daffo6264 How could a non-binary person identify as lesbian? Lesbians are people who identify as females who are attracted to other females. Non-binary people don’t identify as females. And from my understanding, being gay as a non-binary person sounds like they’re exclusively only attracted to other non-binary people since being gay is being attracted to the same gender. Am I understanding that correctly?
@@skylargray5642 Well somewhat, it is complicated, lesbian could be used as a word to mean a female liking another female, but I’ve also seen actual nb people go by lesbian/gay
I think "gay" is used as an umbrella term for being in the LGBTQ+ community as well? I've been asked that question before and I was a bit baffled but then the person explained that they were just asking if I was in the community lol
"are you a boy or a girl?"
honey, I'm a disappointment
Ah actually, I'm a scientist. My gender is taking quick notes and muttering "hm... interesting... I must tell the academy at once." What's in my pants? Potassium Permanganate (ouch)
sksksksks spil the tea sis
shut up
Sarah I’m going to have to ask you to shut up
Same -w-
Hahahahahah😭😭😭😭😭 why do I live
"L̶a̶d̶i̶e̶s̶ a̶n̶d̶ G̶e̶n̶t̶l̶e̶m̶e̶n̶"
*My fellow yees and haws-*
God-tier comment
are you stil going to finish that sentence
*my fellow peo and ple*
Ah yes
The true Texan way
Uhh Uhhh
Yeehaw
Lmao
Gender stereotypes don't change your gender. Like me being a tomboy wouldn't automatically mean I'm no longer a girl.
Correct. Feminine Trans Males and Masculine Trans Women are valid.
Totally true, and you don't even need to call yourself non binary, you can just continue on with your day, doing what you do and not giving a shit what others think
@@Nozrhul Well, that's what I want to do. But I suffer from gender dysphoria if I'm seen as Male or female. So, I identify as Non-binary which gives me gender euphoria and try to live my life. But people keep stopping me and making who I am political or whatever. I just want to live my life.
My identity has nothing to do with stereotypes or anything. But people make me feel like I'm faking my identity if I'm not acting perfectly within those stereotypes!
exactly
"what bathroom do you use"
Bold of you to assume that I use any bathroom at all
I don't need a bathroom at all cuz my shit don't stink just kidding LOL
is it safe to assume that you are from India?
@@s0meRand0m129 im German lmao
@@sakunyaa7825 lmao
My numerous UTIs have entered the chat
I honestly don't walk down the street ticking off people's gender....
@@xavierquinn5215 lol
Exactly!
@@xavierquinn5215 stfu.. you sound like a cross training vegan flamingo as well. Typical 'let me speak to the manager' pissbag.
It's a counter-culture thing. The people in the video have to convince themselves that they are attacked by the whole of the society to justify their self-centeredness. The fact of the matter is the vast majority does not pay attention to the subtleties discussed in the video, if they see a man with tiddies in the streets people are just confused at best.
Sad people do that. Very sad individuals indeed. Like the people in this video. 😌
I have genuine question that I'm confused about...
If you don't identify as male or female how can you identify as being gay?
Because generally speaking homosexual means attracted to the same sex so I'm confused because your non binary
Jess Ferguson good question! the word “gay” has become an umbrella term. when they all say that they’re gay, it just means they’re something in LGBT+.
I agree with ^ I indentify as non binary, and i am pansexual, even though i scream "im gay" all the time. Gay is more used as just having a sexuality other then hetrosexual like bi or pan, so basically non binary people being homosexual is i guess only liking other non binaries? Im not sure but i hope this kind of helped :D ♡
Jess Ferguson same
Jess Ferguson people use the term gay wrong
As someone in the LGBT category. The way I look at it is that either A) Gender and sexuality are different topics entirely. B) If you are Non-binary/Gener Fluid, etc, you would come under demisexual or pansexual.
"are you male or female?"
*I'm a possum in a top hat Carol.*
how do i put this on my passport imiiediately
I'm 30 rats stacked in trench coat tho (I'm non binary btw)
@@alexthegamer7387 ok
@Skarbie Well es Elles :)
@Skarbie Well i dont know spanish so im not sure
Being someone who's nonbinary, I can promise you most of us genuinely don't mind questions in real life lmao. I don't get why these folks are so dramatic over the questions- sometimes people get curious, nothing wrong with that
because they are just pretending to be, they want the attention but not the real life struggles that follow
What’s your gender?
"most of us" no, you said that just to make your "community" look better, most nb people will get mad over that
@@zbattlez5530 who are you asking? The original poster? They said they were non-binary so that is their gender.
@@lagelada3307 it's better to ask questions rather than make assumptions I'd say. Just don't treat people like a lab rat haha!
“Were you born a man or a woman?”
I was born 21 rats stacked in a Trenchcoat.
Edit: thank you so much for all the lovely replies
Same.
I was born 3 bears and 10,000 rats
Oh I was born as a green frog that crawled out of hell
I was born 500,000 snails in a human body
How convenient, I was born as a superior entity that is feared by some and will be feared by all
How are you supposed to learn more about the diversity of people without asking questions
@@sammccreath7641 Why? Maybe the problem is them? Maybe they shouldn't feel like the world owes them anything? Like A.M said they are not special, they just want to be. I feel sad for them.
@@sammccreath7641 But you don't want equality. You want to be special. Equality means you will have to take crap just like every other person on the planet. Yes everyone deserves to be treated with respect but some of these aren't rude questions but now those asking the questions are being treated like stupid. Respect you say? Respect is earned as well and when you start off with the attitude these people displayed what do they expect from people? To act as if you are better and more special than others is one sure way to get treated differently and what would happen if the person respectfully states that they don't agree with this lifestyle? They get branded and lambasted as transphobic when it's just something that they don't agree with. Respect goes both ways.
@@sammccreath7641 you say you want equality and you dont have it yet. What equalities have been given to others and not you or this group? Genuinely curious but I will say that these individuals dress to stick out like a sore thumb and that might not help when you walk about in public. This video is full of people that look like goofballs and that would definitely cause people to ask questions. Also never heard a generation talk about genitals soooo much in my life.
We wait till they give us instructions and hopefully they tell you their preference or preferences. Sounds alot like Government Organizations to me.
@@sammccreath7641 that's hard to do because I have asked questions in the most polite way and people have taken offense to it. I literally asked an associate of mine that is Trans due to being worried about starting a conversation with a fellow human "How should I approach someone that I'm not sure of their preference? Should I slowly talk and get into what do they identify as? " And he got offended I didnt know when I honestly didn't in this situation. Kind of ruined our relation because I remember when I met my associate years ago it was just natural and we were cool. Now I can almost feel the stigma of individuals feeling as if I'm automatically going to offend them on purpose. The vibes are like walking on eggshells. Years ago seemed people didn't care about preferences at all. I remember him asking me a few years back if I was gay and I simply said no and took no offense. Just find it ridiculous that now for some reason some of the first conversations you have with someone is trying to find out their preference so you don't offend them. When it shouldn't be that way. We should be able to talk naturally and bond without having to even worry about personal preferences. I mean at the end of the day it's a personal preference so why isn't staying personal during the beginning stages of introduction? Not saying that in a way of dont ask dont tell but in a true world of equality you naturally just talk to people and bond not caring about anything that is visible. I have had conversations with homeless individuals that no one will approach eveb individuals apart of the LGBTQ community because their visible appearance and they were the best conversations I have ever had. I don't think many understand the actual meaning of equality.
Unisex - “that word needs to die” but....isn’t that a good thing... i-
exactly?? what-
they make all this stuff up. Ask them to define what non-binary is and they cannot even do it. It has no definition. Ridiculous.
@@Ray03595 the definition of nonbinary is literally "outside of the (gender) binary"??? It isn't complicated luv
What the heck is wrong with the word unisex? Seriously?
@@gr1mreap3rz15 how does one be outside of the gender binary?? genuine question, not even intersex people are outside of the gender binary, they are somewhere in between
"Which bathroom do u use?" NONE. I piss in a bottle and shit in the garden
Sounds ideal tbh.
Who the hell asks: "What's going on down there?"
more people than you'd think
@@immerensisdeus no one goes around asking what going on down there especially if that person is just a stranger or random person in the street
@A M. dude you have no clue how often I get asked if im a boy or a girl, if im trans, and then if I answer, what my genitals are/if ive had surgeries. you say we are fixated on our sex, and yeah, thats probably true! wanna know why? because we spend every day in a body that feels Wrong. most days I cannot even pinpoint why, exactly, but my body feels wrong all the time. like it isn't mine. like it's some mask or suit im wearing. except I cant take it off. and every day, no matter how hard I try to cover it up or change it, people see the suit im wearing and assume thats the gender I am. do you know how painful that is? so, yeah, maybe we are obsessed with our genitalia. because we have the wrong ones. and im sure if you were in that position, you would want to try and get rid of that suit to the best of your ability, too. for some its literally a matter of life and death. I know personally I was once so depressed from my dysphoria I seriously considered killing myself because transitioning is so difficult and so expensive. shits tough, and you aren't making it any easier
More then you’d think. I’ve had several kids at school ask me “so umm, what are you?” while looking at my crotch.
A M. I’m not fixated on my sex so I’m not sure what your talking about. We get surgery and make fake dicks because it makes us feel less dysphoric. Judging my that comment I’m going to assume you don’t keno what dysphoria is (I’m really really sorry if I you do know what dysphoria is and I guessed incorrectly) so I’m going to explain it to you. Dysphoria happens when you are born in the wrong body. Imagine if you were born with boobs (or without if your female) it would feel wrong right? Like something is missing/attached to you that’s not supposed to be. That why we get surgeries to get rid of something that’s not supposed to be there or to add something that’s supposed to be there. It’s like if you had a bump on your leg, it didn’t harm you but it was big, annoying, and it made you didn’t like the bump, especially when people noticed it. You would get it removed right? That way you would feel more comfortable in your body. The same goes for surgeries to change genitals, it’s to make you feel more comfortable in your own body. I hope I explained this well! Have a good day!
So is it wrong to think the reason for men's/women's clothing sections is cuz of like the actual shape of the person and like sewing?
@TheWonderWoman2005 "Then why not advertise the clothing as having a certain shape instead of a gender. Its just fabric"
Because the majority of people on the planet identify as male or female. If you don't like that, tough luck.
As a cis man with very wide shoulder who frequently shops in the women's section of clothing stores, most clothes, if large enough, will fit you without much problem regardless of gender
@Tarot Tune Up Most of the time when society mostly goes one way, it is the right way. Most people view murder as bad. Most people view racism as bad. Are they actually bad? Yes. The whole point is gender is determined by dna, you don't pick. The only things that should be identifying as genderfluid are the actual living organisms with male and female organs.
@Tarot Tune Up The Majority would mind their business if the minority would stop acting oppressed and act like they need everything to be changed for them. Literally they changed how we do our graduation gowns at my school because the non-binary students can't stop crying about everything. Chick literally just said clothes should be changed to shape instead of gender. Literally watched a girl complaining about how doctors are rude for assigning them genders. It's not the doctor, it's your dna. What's next.
Tarot Tune Up It’s hard to mind your business when these people literally are going everywhere trying to change everything. My school has had to change so many things because of their crying.
0:10 why is “unisex” a bad word tho
Unisex is a word that means any gender can wear it. But they're saying that if you enter a clothing store it shouldn't be male clothes, girl clothes, it's just meant to be clothes I want to wear not what you define as feminine or masculine wear.
All clothes are gender neutral
@@Upcastpanther Why?
Dylan.thomas7 a boy can wear girl clothes so idk what you mean
PikoStarsider that's false. There are clothes that only a female can wear properly
We will collectively look back at this period in our culture with deep regrets.
Ive been thinking the same thing.
sadly
Shit I don't even have to look back I can barely maintain sanity getting through it.
...
what? this was honestly really difficult to read
My issue with this is mainly their attitudes. They’re being so condescending when this topic is actually very confusing and there are so many contradictions that people outside of this community don’t understand. So to be told we essentially can’t ask any questions to understand it we should just know certain things is extremely frustrating.
020ctmarie and then they get offended when we don’t know what we’re talking about yet we can’t ask questions
Agreed. To them they seem like stupid questions and they laugh at them. I’m not sure why it is funny to them. We are curious and trying to learn.
When we tell people who are cis about it they just make fun of us and think it's funny or cool to be transphobic so I dont see why most of the time we should just be nice and over the moon when people are transphobic towards a whole group of people they know nothing about at all
Well sometimes you don't really have to know everything about a person. Just because you don't understand something doesn't mean you have to question people on things like their genitalia. (kill me if I'm wrong if so iam very sorry)
Sam I said nothing about questioning someone’s genitalia.
Damn just had a gender reveal.
It came back negative :(
Cereal this is the best comment hands down 😭😭😭😭😭😭
I am sorry for that
I even didn't came out
this reply section has no drama! woo!
As a Pan, Non-Binary human.
love the minecraft bee on the pan flag, it's all i ever wanted in life
CunfuffleBuffle
You don’t exist
"I look inside and I ask myself: 'Do I feel like a man or a woman?' And the answer is that I feel like shit" - ContraPoints
mood 24/7
facts
Mood.
You gotta look inside yourself and say "What am I willing to put up with today?" NOT FUCKIN GENDER
@@jumptherooftops6333 I got the reference
Social contagion at it's finest. And narcissistic preoccupation with "identity".
Nailed it.
It's being called a mental illness, spread the word. It's not in their best interest either, to participate in their delusion.
The person on the right on 6:10 is really nice. "That's okay. It's really okay to not understand." (Y)
No sry, I didn't even know him until now.
Ikr. He's like the only sane one there
I am non-binary and I appreciate when people ask because they aren't just assumeing my gender
@Joey G but you are wrong there is 3 sex's and many gender identities stop being ignorant
And I am in AP classes and spend most of my time in hospitals (cancer reasons) so I know my biology
The problem is that these people (not all of them) get super angry when you dont understand it. Thats the reason we ask, because we dont understand *but we want to* . How are we supposed to understand you if you get all angry and defensive when we try to??
Lena with a Box there is biological sex, which is assigned at birth, gender is they portrayal of that, you can portray gender in any way, a non binary person can feel boyish and girly at the same time, and trans persons biological sex doesn’t match with their gender, so they change their gender, hope this helps! Ask questions
@@vivamalcarney6205 uh, yeah. What is the difference between a non binary person and like, a tomboy? i know there is a major one, but i never really got it... Thanks for answering my questions btw
from what i can tell just from this video. the difference between a tomboy and non binary is non binary seem to care what u call them and a tomboy doesnt really care they just want to live life.
The difference between a tomboy and a non-binary person is expression; the way someone looks: masculine, feminine androgynous, or a mix of that. The way someone expresses there gender isn't the same as being any certain gender. A tomboy is someone who dresses masculine and identifies as a woman, and a non-binary person identifies with not being male or female. How masculine or feminine you dress doesn't affect what your genders is, and plenty of non-binary people dress masculine, plenty dress feminine, and there are a lot of people who dress kind of in the middle of gender(androgynous).
Lena with a Box. Yeah I mean I don’t get offended when people ask because they’re just questions i use (she/her. And they/them pronouns) and I like that people ask questions and I’ll happily explain to them and people who ask what gender I was born don’t offend me either I just explain what I was born and how I feel about myself honestly so long as they ask politely I’m glad they ask it’s better than them not understanding
About the pronoun question..... please don't be angry if we ask what to call you, politely of course. There are some of us confused folks out here who may not understand, like me, but really do want to learn. We are ALL human beings after all, stuck on this rock together.
Thank you. There’s a lot of sources on internet so if you’re really interested.
Honestly there is no reason for someone to get mad at you for asking. To me it’s the best thing cause I know that person doesn’t want me to feel uncomfortable
I understand what you're saying, but the non-binary people get questions on the daily about that. They start to get annoyed when they get that question every day, even if it's being asked politely. Sorry if I sound rude, and I understand where you're coming from, just think about how many times they get asked that daily. Oof sorry, and have a good dayy
Yes you can ask!! Unless its a situation where you wouldnt have needed to know their pronouns.
So if you are a friend, coworker, acquaintance, etc. thats totally ok to ask.
If you walk up to someone where you wouldnt have been talking to them or referring to them its rude because it might be a question they have to answer over and over and you are basically saying 'im a random person who will never refer to you again I just really needed to know what you are'.
Also heads up, 99% of the time they are a binary /cis person would will be pretty confused/hurt by the question.
This. This is the best way to approach it because you want to learn. And that's amazing enough honestly
"Are you a boy or a girl?"
3 cats in a trenchcoat with a mannequin head acting like a normal human face so we can eat fish when we please
Stealing jokes, unoriginal random humor, WEEB PFP, WEEB HOMESTUCKER -JACK
This made my week. "3 cats in a trenchcoat" is going to be my go to answer to that one.
imagine getting offended over someone asking for your 'pRonoUns', can't relate sis.
And then getting mad when they don't ask and "aSsuMe yOuR gEndEr".
Yeah I agree I'm non binary and I think it's so sweet when people ask
Lucinda hill same!!
Bucky Barnes exactly if it’s “offensive” to ask then how are we going to respectfully address you...
@@luluraven7698 Non binary means a cucked feminist rip
The bald person said Then Learn but how are we supposed to learn if you don’t want anyone to ask any questions?
Ask away, mate. Not all of us are as... unique as those in this video. Some are just trying to live their lives.
Look it up
@@chvllywvlly how to be gay
Maybe not ask sensitive questions in an inappropriate setting to a complete stranger? There are plenty of proper places, online or in person to learn about the lgbt community. If you really must ask that trans /genderqueer colleague of yours, maybe ask their permission to have a private lecture first? But as i said, its a very sensitive topic especially for the trans/genderqueer person in question.
It’s not about not asking questions it’s more about not asking rude questions
i understand she he they.
WHATS A ZIF AND WHATS FEE
ikr, i am non binary and use they,, but zif and fee??
uhh i think they’re other pronouns for people who fit out of the binary stuff? personally i think they’re a bit weird but idk people do what they like
@@ayoo1023 please just let me live my life(?
I don't wish to start any arguments, so I suppose I will just drop it now.
neopronouns make me uncomfortable tbh
I’m open minded but that’s just stupid
Dont care what gender you are all I care is are you a good person
There is only one gender.
OUR GENDER
*Soviet Anthem plays*
Daniel Sniderman how do you not know how many there are. That's when you know what your saying isn't real.
Mmmm idk how many types of water there are... maybe there is 57!!!!
Daniel Sniderman when biology accepts them, then the rest of us will too. Maybe
@Daniel Sniderman "fuck biology I have a brain" is possibly the dumbest think I've ever read. Fuck the arguments idc about genders but you are stupid as shit
Daniel Sniderman biology and psychology are the two factors here and biology is the sole reason there are only 2 genders
@Daniel Sniderman there are 2 genders
So how exactly do they expect to encourage awareness and curiosity if every question you ask is problematic?
I think a lot of the time it's the tone and assumptions that come with the questions that are the problem.
This video isn't exactly serious advice of what not to say. It really just means try to phrase questions non offensively if you're confused. I understand that there's the whole "this generations will be offended by everything" but if you preface things with "I'm not tryna be offensive but" it should go a bit better
Exactly, whilst I totally agree with people’s right to identify as whatever they like and be whoever they want to be, it’s not fair to abuse those who don’t agree with you. Unfortunately you have to accept that people aren’t going to understand and aren’t going to share the same opinions. Too many of us feel so self entitled that we demand that everyone agrees with us. As soon as someone doesnt share the same beliefs they are labelled as transphobic, should lose their job and recieve abuse. Such as in the case of cancel culture. You can’t be liberal if you want to silence people who don’t agree with you.
There are lovely individuals who are non-binary but most of these people in the clip seem ignorant and their attitude is so off putting.
They love not having a straight answer, it gives them a narrative they can work with.
Yes, thank you. Why does asking and trying to understand make you a bigot? Why cant we just assume that people arent bigots and work from there. Why cant we just assume that people are genuinely trying to have an open conversation and understand you rather than trying to upset you? People have debated for millennia, politics, philosophy, ethics, religion, why cant we just talk about these things without assuming every question someone asks you is a personal attack? How can I learn if I cant ask questions. How can I learn if the answer to all my questions is "oh god you are so close minded." Like they throw their arms up when the statement came up "I dont get it" and shout "well learn!" But I've literally learnt nothing from any of the answers they have given to all that great list of questions presented to them literally. Nothing. Apart from apparently in India there is a third gender? Which wasnt explained any further just slapped on the table like it's a well known fact. These things clearly arent well known or more people would understand the third gender no gender thing, so maby they should talk about it and then more people will know. Rather than throw their hands up and act like all these things are so obvious everyone should know. But then the people who are asking to whom it is not obvious and of whom there are clearly a lot because these questions are apparently so common, learn nothing and come away hurt because theyve been called a bigot for not understanding something that noone will explain to them.
Some of these are legit questions I don't understand why they're getting mad...?
Yeah. And I'm non-binary. One question I can understand getting mad at, though, is the GENITALS. Why would you ask it to ANYONE ELSE?
@@machfassett5749 That's true, I can get that because, sure you may be curious but it's a very personal and private thing where only in a very close relationship I would personally share.
I was mainly upset about the part were they got upset about people asking what there’re pronouns are like I don’t feel that that’s a rude thing to ask I’d see it as a sign of respect and it’s not like people can just automatically know someone’s pronouns that’s to me what it sounds like they’re saying that people should just know they’re pronouns
@@laurajholmes Its like if I use the wrong pronouns then you get mad but if I ask you what your pronouns are to make sure I'm being respectful then it also makes you mad..? I'm sure it can get annoying at times if someone forgets or something but I mean its still a relatively new thing to use more that 2 types of pronouns so you have to understand.
I feel like this video really didn't portray non binary people in a good light. As a nonbinary person, I'm never upset if someone asks my pronouns. I personally don't mind if people ask me questions about it. People have to learn about it somehow, right? We should educate whenever possible.
"genitals have nothing to do with your gender"
I am lost for words
It’s like saying that your height has nothing to do with how tall you are! 😂😂😂😂
I wish I had two dicks instead of one.
Language evolves with the way people use it over time and the words sex and gender are not perfect synonyms in every context. People begin using new terminology when the existing terminology is not sufficient to explain what they mean.
im non-binary and i dont get offended by those questions, its normal for people to ask you stuff, especially if theyre new to it.
I am new to understanding NB if we don't ask questions we will never know
@@ellentaylor-king5680 Im glad youre trying to understand! I you dont find it weird, feel free to ask me any question about NB
@@eden-.-3483 thank you x
Non binary huh? That's fucked up lol
lol yeah right, and i am a donkey
"Are you a boy or a girl?"
*I'm 9000 lizards in a coat*
And im 3 books in a bag
Depends of the kind of lizard, cuz if you were all komoto dragons then you would be a gaint! Like probably as tall as a hotel or something!
In 2019, really? :) At this point, it makes me want to pat you on the back really
Sid Sidney can you *be* my fish!?
I say IMA FUCKIN BEAST HONEY
"Why is there female or male clothing" (paraphrasing)
Probably because men and women have different body shapes...
KobyTheHedgehog I was born a woman and I have a very male body shape so?
I do know some women who occasionally wear men's clothing (primarily t-shirts), but men most the time cant do the same... a fit male has a much larger body (not to say a guy couldn't find a larger size, but generally female clothing is made to fit in a specific way while male clothing is pretty basic and universal)
Nikki then wear men's clothing because you have no femininity to flaunt. Men wear men's clothing whether they are pear shaped or fit as a fiddle. This doesn't change that men and women have different bodies, just that yours is inadequate and cannot be marketed as something healthy and attractive. Don't try to pass that off an argument for unisex clothing.
Who are you trying to convince? I prefer hourglass, as do many hot blooded men. There's a difference between child-bearing hips and a pear shaped fatty.
KobyTheHedgehog every human has different body types, so why don't we divide clothing into different body types?
They are not opressed and that's nice. Truly opressed people, like gays and lesbians in my country, need desperately people to listen and make questions, so they can answer and build understanding. Truly opressed people are happy when they even have an opportunity to fight.
YES. THANK YOU. ♥️
"I don't understand?"
"Then learn!"
How are we supposed to learn if you say don't ask questions. And more specifically the questions we would need to ask in a hope to be respectful.
Well, actually, there are a lot of way to learn without ask questions to non-binary persons. Like, for example, there is internet.
And then, i know it could seem weird to say "I don't want to answer your questions, learn alone", but a lot of non-binary/transgender people answer questions all the day, all the week. And it is just really unconfortable and tiring, because it's everytime, and because they feel like they need to justify their existence - which is really hurtfull. It's why they ask you " stop asking". For them it means "let me live my life without ask me to justify my existence".
99% of non binary and trans people I know are very open to questions, as long as they aren't obviously meant to be antagonizing. At the same time, it is not our job to educate you. You can easily do your own research.
There are RUclips q and as watch those
I assume, but virtue of you being able to write RUclips comments, that you are, in fact, not a toddler. Therefore, I trust you can use Google.
That said, I personally don't mind questions, so long as they're not rude or invasive.
It’s not their job to educate you though, and half of the questions you ask (if you ask the same kind of questions portrayed in the video) are just rude or intrusive. If you’re truly curious, search it up. The internet exists.
The question "what's going on down there" doesn't only apply to non binaries, it's weird if you just go up to some random ass stranger and ask that.
I came from birdman's video too 😂😂
It's just stange
nonetheless if you’re asking what is in someones pants you’re a weirdo Thanks For Coming To My Ted Talk
It's usually not specifically "what's in your pants?" It usually shows up as the question, "so have you had any surgeries yet?" Because they're trying really hard to be subtle
Why does the word "unisex" Need to die, exactly?
it's kind of dumb and outdated for the most part. It's a very outdated way of looking at gender that if something is 'for men' and 'for women' it's 'unisex'. Things don't need to be targeted at a specific gender. People can just wear what they want.
Hope this helped :)
@@averyprice1771 unisex means both sexes. Funny how you have been giving false statements this whole comment section wtfff.
Natasha Price but in real life, some clothes are for men and some clothes are for women, that’s just how the majority of people live
Because they don't like it therefore it shouldn't exist.
Cuz it just symbolizes gender roles
If in doubt, use the umbrella term “self-absorbed”.
9 years ago I asked the girl of my dream out on a date. Today I asked her to marry me.
She said no both times
I’m not homophobic, just my guess
Sergio Reyes You know what a joke is right?
I’ve seen this at least 50 times on various parts of the internet
o. m. g. that’s terrible💀
one day buddy
I identify as Michael Jackson, and my pronouns are heehee/shamone
HAHAHAHA that is the best comment I have ever read!!! 😂😂😂
Lmao brilliant
M H this is the best comment ever.
I’ve screenshotted this 😂😂😂
Cool, I’m Alvis Presley
“Where you born man or woman?”
I was born a child, Harold
Or theirbies lol
Well I was born an ADULT 😡
@@gayandfuckingproud3730 well I was born an old man
@@EatFrozenPlastic I was born as a middle aged man
I was born on my birthday
We've gone backwards so much as a society. This video is a perfect example.
Someone saying he or she is non-binary is just like a black or white person saying he doesn't have a colour. Imagine me a black saying I identify as a white😂
@@awemanyfit ok “awe many fit”
You're just regressive
@@meowzer3939 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
@@awemanyfit lol well said 🤣👏
5:07 we have different sections because men and womens bodies are different... right? Right
And also due to the fact that gender identity is rooted into who we are as human beings.
Different body shapes doesn't mean you can't make a dress for someone with a male body. It's more the separation of styles rather than the specific cut of the material
@@sammccreath7641 Mm because I want to go into a store and look at female clothes until I find the shit I want
@billie stan 1. How would you know? Unless you're a mind reader you never know who wants to do what because people can lie about it easily. And two, just because they don't want to wear pink dresses doesn't mean they can't wear something else typically feminine, like high waisted jeans or a skirt
@I'MDEprEssEdaNDqUIrkY but you don't know if it's a majority or not, so you can't really say that the majority of dudes don't wanna wear 👗
This “things not to say to a” series is kind of hostile.
@A M. Telling people not to be dick heads and respect human beings no matter beliefs isnt the worst thing in the world
Kinda is an understatement
Ecyenna Egas I think if it was changed to ‘things you can say to a ____’ or something more open ended instead of complaining and negativity
@A M. these people have been through hell. There's lives have been turn to shreds by people like you. People can't just accept them but have to take time out their day to make them feel worse. Your a dick is what im saying.
@A M. Your acting like we have to do soooo much for them when they don't ask you to do anything but great them as a normal human being
there is only one race, the human rac-
*gets slapped*
WHAT ABOUT NASCAR!
M i L k LEFT AT LONDON KWEEN💜💜💜💜💜💜
theres only one gender..
*AND ITS MINE* HISSSS
Raymond Park mom said it's my turn to have the gender
Skitty Girls no u?
Angry F1 noises
I just avoid anyone who think they can supervise or correct my speech. problem solved.
Me too, I'm not gonna participate in their word games. These kind of ppl tend to be really toxic. I consider ppl describing themselves as non-binary to be mentally ill. Madness has gone way too far by now.
Rip language teachers
So you never went to school, got it.
these people: gender doesn’t matter!
also these people: *overly puts gender stereotypes on everything and everyone*
Judging from your profile pic I don't think you are being dishonest, but genuinely didn't understand, so let's take a step back; Society has and reinforces gender stereotypes and roles, that bears little or none at all biological reasons, so they shouldn't matter nor define you, literally quoting the video: ''you can be a boy and you can like flowers, you can be a girl and you can like cars'', but we have a context in which, in the first case, you are a boy liking a female thing, and sure, there are patterns, but the concept non-binary people have, is to not have a strict separation between genders(male and female), but rather a spectrum, and it's a misconstruction on your part that they define themselves as non-binary because they like both, flowers and cars, this would be just another restriction, gender is more complex, it's based on experiences, how you are perceived and perceive yourself, how you relate to other and other relates to you, and being on the extreme of that spectrum for some it's limiting that understanding.
Even sex is more complex than memes might let you think and it's not so strictly binary either, been both part of sexuality, it might relate to gender in different ways, but they are distinct.
Some non-binary people partly or completely disassociates with the assigned gender at birth due to experiencing social and/or physical gender dysphoria to varying degree, others might be more gender non-conforming.
tiffany tl:dr
@@ゝへY But what he's trying to say is...here is this group that tries to associate themselves as not really having a traditional label of how to identify themselves...while somehow at the same time...extremely particular about what labels they'd actually like to be called. I can't wrap my head around it..which is fine...however, I don't think it's fair to get angry at me when I'm actually trying to understand how to just...talk to you.
when did they do that? lol
tiffany I read your reply with interest because I'm a liberal who thinks non binary is just one step too far. I do think it's a fashion thing. I'm trying to understand.
There is a men's and women's section in stores, because women's clothing has much more space in the chest and hips, and men's clothing is more boxy, wider at the shoulders, and longer, and just bigger in general. So it's not necessarily as much of a gender stereotyping thing all of the time, but there are female builds, and male builds, and they are very different when it comes to shapes and sizes.
Also remember that there are also junior sections, girls, and boys. It's all about the shape of your body!
Imagine having to be a girl, and buying men's jeans. It would be so much harder to find clothes that fit your style and body shape/type. I don't care where you shop, but I personally think it would be a bad idea to combine men and women's clothing sections.
To be honest I take a little from both sides. Usually jeans and stuff from the men's section, and whichever tshirt has the coolest design. I find that the main difference is whether or not an item of clothing has pockets.
Really? Some women buy men's clothing because it fits better, it tends to be made better and more sturdy, or they like the style. Your premise that there is a "female build" and a "male build" doesn't fly in every case.
@@claudianess1464 I'm not saying that if you are female you have to shop in the female section, vise versa. I buy things from the men's section sometimes. But I'm saying that the majority would not like that. Because men's clothing is designed and shaped so differently from women's clothing. Yes, everyone has a different body shape. But if you have fairly large breasts, and buying a men's shirt, most of the time you're either buying a shirt that fits right everywhere, except the chest, or a shirt that fits right at the chest, but not anywhere else. All I'm saying is it's a lot easier for someone who is nonbinary to look in either section, than for everyone else try to find things they like in one.
"I'm gay" ok but gay means you're attracted to the same gender... what?
Actually it means you're attracted to the same SEX. Not gender. That's the biggest misunderstanding. If you were attracted to the gender, you would be attracted to a MASCULINE/FEMININE person (and the sex wouldn't matter). But if you're a woman, and you like men, you might be attracted to a very very andro/masculine woman but in the end it wouldn't work because you like men (and penises I guess ?) and you wouldn't be sexually compatible.
Lucie Ng they still like the same gender and doesn’t matter if their masculine or not
Lucie Ng - Got it in one.
Sophie Tomkinson, I am Non-Binary, and use gay to have a sense of community.
@@lucienguyen4055
Oh my god
*Leave*
Little did we realize it was gonna get worse
Damn straight if trump wins were fucked
@@kstuart371 oh he’s gonna win, i think a majority will not vote wanna vote for a woman of color and that’s reality
One day a person asked me
"are u girl or boy or a gay? " 😅
lmao
Definitely a gay!
ARE YOU A GAY 😂
AppelSiiri Are u a justaway?
Oh man, calling myself a gay would be so much easier.
I don’t like it when they act rude about the questions some people may ask. Like the He or She part. It’s an honest question where people are trying to make sure they don’t offend you. You shouldn’t make people feel shit for asking question and trying to understand you. That would just make them have negative assumptions about all non binary people in the future.
It's more of the phrasing of it than the actual question itself. If someone said, "What pronouns do you use?" Its easier to answer than, "Do you use he or she?" because its more open and not giving you options that you have to choose from.
First off...non binary is fictional...
Secondly...see above.
@@Kornknealious I love this
@@hannahp7205 seriously? The phrasing of the question? Is their skin that thin that if you phrase your questions wrong they'll take offense?
Joseph Clark It’s not offensive as such, it’s just easier to answer when it’s an open question and not one with set answers.
“Were you born a man or a woman?”
I was born a baby obviously
Were you a male or female baby? (Clue: check your birth certificate.)
@@EsotericTherapy I was born as 35 small frogs stacked in a trench coat. It says that on my birth certificate
@@SeveralRasInAJacket I’m actually 37 bees in a skin suit
@SuperWyt, SuperStr8, SuperRyt can you stop being such a douche, dude?
@@EsotericTherapy i was born a human lol
"you can be a boy and like flowers, you can be a girl and like cars." YES! THERE YOU GO! So no need for non binairy terms that no one understands and you can't explain.
STOP TALKING SENSE, YOU NART-THEE!
This should have a million likes
Seems kind of ridiculous to be offended when people don’t immediately understand your personal situation regardless of whatever that may be. I mean, feel free to educate us but don’t get pissed because we can’t immediately identify with your world view. And it’s natural to be curious about stuff you’ve never been exposed to. That’s how we learn.
kesayo, Thank you. Some people (am I allowed to even say 'people'(??!) just like being triggered so here, please take the attention you ordered 😅😅😅
As a non-binary human, I agree I will very gladly answer questions, and try to educate
@@nikolaipetrichor2065 Is it education when all you can say is made up?
I agree. I am exploring my femininity right now. I want to answer more questions to affirm my identity. As long as it is respectful I have no issues with that.
Samantha Scott That’s the political movement known as far left SJW. Get upset about everything no matter how minuscule it may be.
my gender is 'queen' my pronouns are your highness and your majesty
a billion bucks
the best i can do is 10
10 billion or just 10 bucks?
I love this comment so much
I identify has male because they are two genders and I have a penis
When ur creating a custom character and you click *RANDOMIZE*
General Maulious 😂👏👏as an enby with no fashion sense, this is such a mood
Never ask someone in a kilt what gender they are
@@akasickform i thought a kilt was scottish war attire
@@f4g0nm3th Anything a scot is wearing could be Scottish war attire if you cross them
@@lightlozabow uhgrbgdfkhbg’hdbg’hgbbgktt
As far as I understand, you have no idea who you are.
"is it he or. She or they or what"
How am i suppised to adress you by your prefered pronoun if i am not allowed to ask. And then throwing a tantrum when its wrong geez
Its okay to ask what our pronouns are, in fact its great when people do because then it shows they care, just be careful the way you phrase it
@@alexlaw236 okay. If i as you like this "what pronouns should i refer to you by?" is that okay? Or should i phrase it different
@@lenap319 yeah, that's perfect! It's just when people act like it's a drag or a huge responsibility to ask or use the right pronouns that it starts to go south, for the most part the majority of LGBT people who has a different pronoun will be fine if you're just respectful about it
@@alexlaw236 yeah, i never met a nonbinary or trans person, so i never acvidentaly misgendered one. I assumed that (same is in fandoms and such) theres a vocal minority that gets realy offemded if you accidentaly say the wrong ponoun (even if you apologize and correct yourself right after). But i figure thats just a small lart of the comunity. (also im bisexual and most of my friends are bi or gay. I just dont really associate with the nb part, because where i live theres no or just little nb and trans people)
@@lenap319 yeah, there is a minority of really *really* offended trans, NB, ect. people and thats all you really see and all that people really think about... Also like all of my friends turned out to be NB or trans (I'm genderfluid) and some of them get really self conscious about pronouns but that's about it, as long as your respectful most good people will forgive you. Hell, my best friend went three months without telling me his preferred name and to use her/him pronouns
Are you a boy or a girl? Yes
Thoughts And feels Are you a boy or a girl? No.
Thoughts And feels That made me think of one Thomas Sander vine
Are you a boy or a girl? Depends on the day.
Thoughts And feels I'm death
Programming Boolean statement XD
Please don’t judge all non-binary people based on this video! I can assure you that most of us aren’t like this!
Delusional? I think you are
pretty sky Rude? I think you are.
Weird
Boi True, but you to automatically label it as delusional is rather rude, especially if someone has gender dysphoria. (Something they can’t control)
camelia mihailescu
Freaking dumb? I think you are.
My god, the level of narcissism is just astounding...
I hope you said that into a mirror.
the one in glasses was so sweet. “that’s ok, it’s really ok to not understand”
TwentyØneDunTylers -_- ew why are you literally a stereotype?
roguexxrenegade I don’t like you very much but your comment made me laugh.
TwentyØneDunTylers -_- The guy in glasses?
There only two gender
She wasn't sweet it really is ok
Imagine walking down a street and some random stranger yells "Hey! You have a d**k!"
Yeah that'll never happen
I have some friends that would teach you other wise . 😐😂
Yeah these people need help, it’s a delusion. Whenever I get a delusion my friends and family know not to encourage it.
@Mabel Willianson Who?
@Mabel Willianson Alright well, I do know that there is only two genders so I am confused about that? The only thing I did in comment was mock what that person said, because that is just ridiculous from my point of view.
@Mabel Willianson Well, I'm sorry that I haven't really made my point. What I wanted to say is basically that, in my point of view, I believe that no one would shout that in public. But yeah, I know that I'm wrong, it would basically be the same to say that someone believes that no one would die from idk, fever or cold, yet it happens. And damn that feels bad to hear, hope those bullies regret it :v
"Are you a boy or a girl"
If you are confused about my gender, then that means it's working
So girl then.
@@Rashy225 no , they / them lol
@@Rashy225 I feel like this should be added to the video-
You sound like a pain in the ass.
@@senbontorii2680 holy shit, that came out of nowhere
It’s your obsession not ours
Presumably it's ok to ask, "Why should anyone else care about how you perceive yourselves?"
Because, people will perceive you as whatever they want, no matter what you want.
@Spawn of The Lavender Menace it makes me uncomfortable to be required to participate in someone else's religion.
@Spawn of The Lavender Menace If you want to be 'kind' to a person, do NOT enable him/her in such delusions. It's like inviting an alcoholic to split a bottle of whisky instead of getting him into detox.
@@ernsttrekiew198 i don't think the alchoholic would think that was very kind. + these ppl are just ppl at the end of the day so you can't expect them to answer everything with a perfect answer. like imagine i had to explain why i'm straight every single day. i would prob get angry too and i'm not even sure i would have an answer for them let alone a perfect one
@@desrj ‘🤓’
@@psycless you would if you told everyone you've met about it and demanded language changes.
"Your Genitals have nothing to do with your gender" Well there goes my entire understanding of everything ever...
my perception is that genitals is sex, gender is what you identify as. I may be wrong, please correct me if so.
Joanna Buchanan if you want to abolish science as we know it you are correct.
@@billieeyelashhh4613 science does label us, if I'm not wrong we have chromosomes that depict our gender, so saying that science doesn't label us is utter bullshit.
@@user-it4qo8qs6h Spot on!
@@user-it4qo8qs6h actually the chromosomes define your gametes your genitalia and secondary characteristics linked to your hormonal production...not your gender (which can be in harmony or not with you assigned sex and is completely free from hormonal control caused by your chromosomes...gender is in the head and can cause dysphoria if not in harmony with the sex you are born with )
Because if you take things like that we could also say that it defines your sexuality and attraction because of how reproduction works...but we know it's not the case...just like your sex doesn't define your sexuality it also doesn't define wether or not you feel comfortable about your female or male body/ body parts...otherwise dysphoria wouldn't exist...as a transgender for example you are completely dysphoric with your body being the one of the opposite sex....as a genderqueer you could also experience dysphoria but only on things that are specific to yourself or/and only at certains times or not at all and not minding being one or another (like at this moment i wouldn't mind being a male just like i don't mind being a female)...for example you could experience dysphoria about your body hair but not at all about your genitalia....or one day being proud and happy about your female body (breasts,curves and all) and the day after feeling like you are not supposed to have breasts (or be better without them) and think your body is supposed to be more male looking (and Feel extremely bad and confused about it)....
Our specie is known for not being a slave to it's genetic and hormones ...because our really complex brain (and big amount of grey and white matter) takes over hormonal control.....it's also why we are unable To differenciate a male brain to female's in terms of how they use it....all people are a mosaic of different neurological paths. And gender is a part of the mosaic and is specific To each individuals.
I'm all for people doing what they want with their own life but people who identify as non binary, do not get mad when people call you he or she unless you explain to them. You can't just assume people will know you're non binary or that they even know what that means. That's the only thing I've seen personally that bothers me.
Shyla Saunders I think these people are not being very understanding. there are so many of us (including me) who are simply curious about this topic and might ask some of these questions in a respectful manner and dont mean any harm. some of us simply want to learn because we aren't educated well enough on this topic. I don't think we are expected to be educated on this either. there are so many things in the world and it's like everyone's expected to know everything about our society right now but that's simply impossible. I didn't even know what non binary meant before the video started. but now I do. and it is OKAY that I didn't know. I simply hadn't been taught before, and now I have. I believe that someone simply asking a question (to someone they know, maybe not just a stranger on the street throwing accusations) but if you are asking in a respectful manner, then these people should answer! they are so upset that we don't know these things, yet we haven't been given answers, so answer us!! don't judge us for not knowing.
Shyla Saunders I'm non-binary and whenever someone calls me "she" or "her" I just kindly tell them "I prefer they/them better." I kindly tell them again if they forget. But when someone knows and is calling me a "she" on purpose that makes me mad. (But I'm too shy to say anything)
Maddie; no, it is the "non-binaries" who are not being understanding or tollerant. If you consider yourself a different gender that the only two known to all human kind ....and expect the rest of humanity to instantly understand and know all the "other" genders - don't get upset or demanding.
Maddie okay exactly! If you want me to use your pronouns, tell me your pronouns. Don't just think I'll know them. And at that point, don't be upset with me about it, if I didn't know! That just makes things more difficult for both me and you. It's so annoying to be in fear of upsetting someone because they assume I know they're non binary.
Thomas Korn if you read my comment correctly, I said if someone KNOWS I'm nonbinary and says "she" or "her" on purpose just to piss me off or annoy me, that annoys me. But if someone doesn't know I just kindly tell them "I prefer they/them better"
What about:
How much of you being a creepy, self-indulgent weirdo comes from having a terrible relationship with your father?
mr krabs makes cents
"Were you born a man or woman"
Me: I was born a mistake
same
No one was a mistake it's not how you where born it's what you do with the gift of life
The Watcher That was the lamest shit I’ve read all day ty
@@sideeswipe lmao you legend
MOKLAPP Hahahha thank you thank you I try
I think that asking if it is she or he or them is a good thing if you say it in the right way. People just dont know how to call you and they dont want to misgender you
Ella Pöll its just the rude way in which people comment on my like instagram saying "is it a he or she"
generic then turn off the comments
My preference is to ask "what pronouns do you use"
Tamang Tman no?? maybe i could just tell those people not to ask that??
generic you could try, but they are still gonna comment if they have the option to.
A person in my art class was like "they're are only 2 genders" then this other person said "i can name 7! Gay, straight, lesbian, bi-" *THOSE ARE SEXUALITIES!!!! THERE IS A BIG DIFFERENCE!!!!!*
Jill Whitmore They're obviously joking.
Salt Sama they weren't tho........
Jill Whitmore How do you know?
Jill Whitmore what grade are you in?
@Jill Whitmore thats a good point. Now Im wondering if the T will be dropped off LGBT. (...brainache)
Being non binary is a trend. Like the top knot.
*They get offended really easily*
Jana Amr THANK YOU 😂
its not easy offence, we just want people to respect us for who we are and honestly “they get offended easily” is just kind of a transphobic slur
Mystíe :3 no u offend easy unisex is for both genders and bc u think have none doesn’t mean u respect who u are
that makes honestly NO sense. please learn english and try again
Mystíe :3 How do you know they’re being transphobic? Jana (OP) may not have meant all transgender people are too easily offended, maybe Jana was using “They” as a pronoun to talk about specific person in this video. Maybe your the one being transphobic, how dare you assume he was talking about more than one person just because the word “They” was used.
Says she or him
*gets offended*
Asks what their pronouns are
*gets offended*
Like, I’m sorry I don’t know what you are, but don’t need to get so offended if I can’t tell and just met you
e x a c t l y. 👏 i hate this part of the nb/genderfluid community that gets offended by everything and feel so progressive and cool for it. like damn...
just say ‘may i ask what your pronouns are?’ don’t be a dick about it. easy.
Gingie
It’s cause some people say it in an offensive manner that can seem like they are taking the piss
Gingie it’s better to ask, most people do not get offended, yes some people are like that but people are also like that when you mis gender their dog
You could ask.. just ask their pronouns
“where you born a man or a woman”
i was a born a duck sorry
Not funny.
@Landon Hoppe It's my opinion, no need to get defensive.
I don’t mind that question as long as they are kind and appropriate and respectful about that
@Landon Hoppe I didn't say offensive, stop getting so defensive.
@Landon Hoppe no. U
Their reactions to the questions just makes anyone like this come across as "confrontational" and rather unapproachable especially if they have unhealed trauma! which we all have to heal through our lives!)
If everyone had trauma it wouldn't have diagnostic criteria.
Most of these questions aren't even rude. They say that you should "learn", but when you ask a question that may help you understand the concept they get really defensive. Nb people should be more open to questions.
but people are going to question it because its not normal, and they are just being polite and trying to understand and these people get annoyed, well its better than getting stoned to death like in other places of the world atleast these people are willing to accept them rather than actually discriminate or be mean to them. They could just accept that they are different and be happy that people are still willing to accept them but they need a little information first. They shouldn't get annoyed about it, its kinda a new thing so they should be happy to explain and let everyone know what they are so they understand. to expect people to understand from the get go is just ignorant and they themselves should be more open. Just my take on it anyway.
evo brit your missing the point, the people in the video seemed annoyed that people would even ask these questions..
CMX_ but it's not really like that? Trust me, I get a lot of questions every day about who I am and why that is, being a bisexual punk dude, and I answer them politely, because I want people to understand it better. Being asked stuff like "well how gay are you" and "well since you're punk you must be a criminal right" is annoying, yes, but I want people to understand the world and see things from toher perspectives, so I answer them. If you're sensitive to being questioned, you shouldn't stand out. It's not the wise thing to do if you want to live your life without being asked questions.
Skyler I think these people are not being very understanding. there are so many of us (including me) who are simply curious about this topic and might ask some of these questions in a respectful manner and dont mean any harm. some of us simply want to learn because we aren't educated well enough on this topic. I don't think we are expected to be educated on this either. there are so many things in the world and it's like everyone's expected to know everything about our society right now but that's simply impossible. I didn't even know what non binary meant before the video started. but now I do. and it is OKAY that I didn't know. I simply hadn't been taught before, and now I have. I believe that someone simply asking a question (to someone they know, maybe not just a stranger on the street throwing accusations) but if you are asking in a respectful manner, then these people should answer! they are so upset that we don't know these things, yet we haven't been given answers, so answer us!! don't judge us for not knowing.
Maddie okay I completely agree with you.
"Whats between your legs?"
Death and destruction, Timmy
Yeah that shit prolly stinks💀
Ur mum
@Eric Nunez Robles why do you care?
What's between my legs is a blinding unit of light in which my genitalia are unable to be seen
Thighs
the difference between male and female clothing is that female clothing is tailored to fit the female body for example bigger breasts and hips
It doesn’t though it’s still stupid
I'm afab and I wear "female" clothes and they still don't fit me so...
TheCrap what’s stupid about clothes fitting to your body? If you want you can wear clothes fitted for a male body. They are just bigger because men tend to be bigger than women.
Yep. Which sucks, because I have zero boobage and, like, Shakira hips.
There is a grand total of zero dresses that fit my hips and don't make me look like a walking square.
I saw a hot woman with a penis yesterday. I blew my brains out and now I am a ghost that reads comments sections. I miss my boner.
Thank you for giving me a list of things to say to nonbinary people.
same
Same
@@ladymaria892 wtf
Wth 😐
Wow you got the whole squad laughing 😐
“You can be a boy and like flowers” quote of the year.
Its more than about "flowers"
no it's not
Doctor : oh! Congratulation it's a boy!
Mom : *slap doctor* how dare you assume my child's gender
Giving humanity 30-70 years to still be alive is awfully generous at this point. How are we getting this stupid!?
@@DiddyCanFly Idiocracy 2006 film. I swear the writer had a time machine!
@@DiddyCanFly I know we have an endless database of information in our pockets now and yet our minds are so feeble? Like how?
There I edited my comment
Yeah, the doctor is saying useless stuff😂 Just say "congrats, it's a healthy baby". Or say "congrats, you have a baby with a peepee"🤔 So simple~
These "Things not to say.." videos send such a wrong message.
I mean of course you shouldn't insult or discriminate against people but sometimes there are genuine questions on the list that weren't meant in a bad way. They may sound dumb to people that are familiar with the situation but it is stupid to say "You are rude if you ask these questions." Just answer the question and be happy that people are genuinely interested in you and want to learn :)
This is how people react. Sometimes these people mean it harmlessly, and sometimes not, and the group that they have for that video addresses that. If anything, this video helps us understand how the people on the receiving end of these questions feel, and how not to do that.
Enna Whitehorse Ah. So there willing for others to have bad feelings like being uncomfortable and anxious. So that they don’t have the same feelings? Perfect logic.
In the Philippines, we have people who are called bakla, people assigned male at birth who mostly have a feminine gender expression, and tomboys who are the other way around. They are seen as a third gender and they have existed even since pre-colonial times. The Filipino language itself is mostly gender neutral when it comes to pronouns: we mostly use "siya" when indicating the third person. What I'm saying is gender is fluid. Non-binary or genderfluid people have always existed and are part of our society and of course should be respected. Although it might be a struggle for many people in the beginning for people in the English-speaking world or any other language that uses two or more pronouns. But, respecting and accepting these people who identify in between is one step forward for humanity.