Anomaly: The Conjuring Bootleg Movie You Didn't Ask For But Which I Decided to Review for Halloween
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- Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024
- The Possum reviews a haunted house movie for Halloween.
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@@treeboi4613 و تنزيل
Did anyone ever figure out why the Goblin turned on the stove?
I did not, but I will wait for answer with you.
No clue
I want that to be a running joke in the channel
To pad out the run time?
It was to heat up the fireplace poker that was on it. The real question is who the heck keeps their fireplace poker on their stove?
"Oh look we've got pumpkins."
pineapples are better
Oh shit we've got pumpkin
s
Can I have them
@@Akunai_ sure
Apples are better
"And Tommy, who's haircut makes you want to slap his parents." Hilarious.
He's a stand-in for the mother in case she needs someone to complain to the manager, but she doesn't want to sport the appropriate haircut.
For once I want an accurate haunted house movie where the ghost just makes a bunch of noise at 3am and the human occupant screams at them to shut the fuck up.
I love how possum gets instantly angry now when the next weird thing breaks into his house.
Hopefully the next review isn’t some obscure Kaiju movie... for obvious reasons.
he Basically killed every single skit
@@Nat20streak don't forget Sasquatch and the evil scarecrow
And he tore an alien’s face off
@@theratman6468 and mauled a scientifically accurate Velociraptor
@@jeremyallen492 and the ant dude. Who's the ant supposed to be anyways?
Surprised you didn’t point out “Morgan Le Fay” is a character from Arthurian legend. They didn’t even think up an original name for their ghost/spirit.
Also, unless I'm missing something, why is Morgan in England? Morgan originates from England and this story seems to take place in America. They don't have English accents and they don't state they're in England. Correct me if there is a detail I overlooked
Morgan Le Fay is a villain in the DC universe.
@@Matthew-Anthony LOL! And Gygax got all things D&D from Diablo too, right?
@@TacDyneAre you serious!?
It is actually "Morgana de LaFey"
They point the torches at their face because they think it will make them scarier than the ghost, it works about as well as it does in the last light
A horror movie using a jumpscare to scare you is like a comedian tickling you to make you laugh.
omg, this is the best allegory I've read
The ghost is Dr shaym and the family are the feminists.
But who is the midnight-invader opossum?
@@Vedlom that's up for you to decide.
And i am guessing that Cindy is the Sasquatch.
@@pieynot9084 The priest it is.
I never watched Conjuring, but after learning the exsistence of this movie, I don't even want to.
Also, the gif of possum shooting a Thompson in gangster clothes is the best.
Trust me, conjuring is great at scaring you. I recommend you watch it, it's a great movie.
@@ClapperAlien269 and only the 2 Conjuring. Annabelles and Nun are bad, to be kind.
Yeah this movie took the Conjuring (an actual good scary movie) and just ripped it to shreds and lit it on fire for good measure.
The Conjuring is actually pretty spooky, I recommend it. Don’t watch the other movies though
Watch it
One of these days when I’m not so broke, I will achieve the legendary status of “$10 Patron”.
So if one was to become a $10 parton....so is that...like one payments......or like monthly....or......
Fun fact there's a movie called: attack of the killer donuts and guess the budget
I've seen that movie and yeah, it's kinda ass
A bakers dozen.
@@schmitty5461 *slow clap* I’m proud of you.
200$?
Holes
"Avenge Me!!!"
"I Won't!!!"
Why do I feel like that's something I would do...
i thought the same thing
You should've reviewed Fred 2. Would've been a more horrifying experience
Slow down there, Satan
Nah. Shoulda done Zombie Nation
LOL
@@AFarmerCalledChicken Agreed.
THERES A FRED SEQUEL?!?!?!?!?!
On the note of the flashlight gag, if they had her use a cellphone flash instead they could have lit her face with the light from the screen.
Also, in the words of every horror game reviewer ever, flashlights don't do the narrow beam pinhole thing (at least to human eyes) and would faintly illuminate the area around it.
Traditional flashlights, yes. But I actually own a flashlight that can be focused to a narrow beam, and no outer rim of dim light, or a massive circle of bright light.
@@Oskanwhitchfather I mean yeah, but that's not usually the ones implied to be used in shitty horror movies or Unity engine asset flips.
I have a flashlight that can light up an approxmently entire room and you can see the light beam.
@@jackalenterprisesofohio I'm not saying you cant see the beam, I'm talking about in horror games when its ONLY the beam. Some movies and games will literally have a pitch black screen with a perfect circle cut out of it like a spot light.
Honestly, I thought there would be a review of Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred.
Your “jump scare” is probably the only one I’ll ever remember, not because it was actually scary, but instead just because it coincidently happened while I was taking a piss. (You got me because I wasn’t paying attention, well played man.)
A jump scare that literally scared the piss out of someone? Even by coincidence, that's impressive
"Why'd the goblin turn on the stove?"
I'm dead.
Love shit like that.
The scariest kitten ive ever seen, i dont think ill be able to sleep at night after seeing that!
Yeah! That thing was a abomination!!!!
Quite the *_killer kitten!_*
@@favoritemustard3542 BITES ZA DUSTO!
I do the "scaring somebody by walking up behind them" all the time at work without meaning to. Pisses them off.
Same here, but I chastise them for getting scared.
Do you have a foley artist following you around with an anvil?
I just do that, even though I don't mean to.
I do the same thing with my mom. Not even meaning to. Apparently I'm just too quiet for her.
Do you grab their shoulder though?
#WhyDidTheGoblinTurnOnTheStove
Me and my brother almost died because we were driving while listening to this 😂😂😂😂😂
happy to see someone else noticed that
RIP?
F
Don’t watch RUclips while you drive
@@bluelick7578 obviously you don't read......we were listening
17:33 "What happened to the lights?"
-"They went out."
i haven't watched it but that's gotta be the greatest piece of dialogue in the entire movie
I was scrolling through the comments and found this at that scene 😅
Must be due their annual lobotomy.
"Avenge MEEEEE!"
"I Won't!"
It's always a good day when possum uploads
Hey, a fellow furry!
@@justafurrywithinternet317 either you're everywhere or you just have an unoriginal username
@@goofball7354 I am not sure, I mean I make dumb comments whenever I can, but I am also unoriginal.
You can hear the alcoholism in his voice and I think it's getting worse.
Uh oh
you'd drink to if you had to watch the movies
He and The Critical Drinker should have a beer together.
@@Matthew-Anthony Correction: ALL the beer.
That kitten jumpscare was clever. More well executed than modern jumpscares.
I never knew that there was a conjuring bootleg and I wish I never knew
They have only recently moved into this house, yet look how filthy it is.
Crack House?
At least the Snake didn’t turn on the Stove.
But why dit the goblin
@@timopino2726 DON'T KNOW!
"Enjoy your existential nightmares you prick!"
The anthem for our time.
Also why did the goblin turn on the stove?
If there was a goblin turning on the stove that movie would be a lot better
Why’d the goblin turn on the stove!?
😂 that callback was hilarious
Getting startled is an instinctual reflex response. Fear is an emotion. There you go :P
Damn that person has a semi-Famous step dad now!
"Richard reads a book in the dark like a normal person..." 🤣🤣🤣
The possibility of the Possum giving a straight answer to if he's going to review Fred 2 is equal to the possibility of him finding out why the goblin turned on the stove.
when she screamed "im gunna go back inside" it looked like it genuinely scared the three actors around her, like they didnt expect it lol
Anyone else ever notice how it's always a *woman* that gets attacked in the shower in a horror movie?
_Wish Upon_
_Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter_
Cause men don't shower lmao
All thanks to Psycho.
@@caninecritic9170 Hey! I shower sometimes!
@@justafurrywithinternet317 Do you use soap?!?!?!
8:30 that didn’t even startle me it just hurt my ears, like omg I was wearing headphones.
7:56 I've also explained it in these two ways:
1: An ACTUALLY scary movie will make you anxious while watching it.
2: An actually scary movie will immerse you to the point where you forget on some level that the characters can't hear you and you're actively trying to warn them.
That whole dinner conversation scene of the guy telling his fiancée that their car is not working properly and she just answers "really" with soo much glee on her face cracks me up 🤣.
I suspect she had secretly tampered with the car in an attempt to get some insurance from his death, and she was trying her hardest to act surprised when her plot was foiled.
@@seanhuds229 The movie is actually almost brilliant, it just needs a few more hints for the audience that Paige and the Father are actually trying to steal the house from the father. well the biological one not the Catholic one. The catholic one is the one who's in on it with Paige. the daughter just has PTSD from the whole thing and is an insane insane asylum.
Possum is naturally angry, it's a part of his character, but his immediate reaction to the ghost showing up genuinely caught me off-guard
the ghost showing up?
can you give a timstamp?
I had a family of raccoons get into my attic and walls. The sounds of them scratching and scurrying about up there is 95% overlap with what people describe as noises they hear in a haunted house. Maybe try calling animal control before calling the ghost busters.
That cat jumpscare got me more than any horror movie
"Why did the goblin turn on the stove"
The Goblin turned on the stove to heat the fire poker. It just happened to be the same color as the stove.
Why hasn't anyone else caught this? Lol
If you hadn't said Father Joseph, I would've seriously thought he has Jewish. The back of his hair is shaped like a perfect yamaka.
Father Cheech amirite
The thing Possum is most scared of is a fridge with no beer
Is that an ERB reference?
@@trevorreviews647 😉
I've seen people claim that ghost movies aren't scary anymore, and while I DON'T agree with that position at all, I will admit that there is a disturbing lack of creativity when it comes to movies about ghosts & demons. Too many of them fall back on the same tired cliches, and never try to push the boundaries and try something new.
I say if you're going to make a movie about ghosts and/or demons think less "The Conjuring" and more "Beetlejuice". Think less "Paranormal Activity" and more "Prince of Darkness". Don't think "The Blair Witch Project" think "Dreams in the Witch House". Even when it comes to video games, take a lesson from "Corpse Party" or "Mad Father", not "The Dark Occult"...Don't think "Ghost Hunters", think "Ghostbusters"!
I have to disagree with Conjuring/Beetlejuice and Ghost Hunters/Ghostbusters. They are such different movies or shows where you take serious and turn them into comedies.
That patreon setup was actual 2000iq moment
I found your channel not so long ago, and I don't regret it. Also, thank you for your multiple sacrifices of watching these movies for us. Thank you for not having us lay our eyes on these terrible movies by watching them for us. Amen.
"The Conjuring Bootleg Movie You Didn't Ask" but actually someone asked for
Also snakes don't hiss like that, that 'hiss' is meant to represent a rattler, and I gotta say, that tiny-ass snake ain't a rattler.
It is not even the right kind of snake.
I think it would be really cool to see a short film about someone who moves into a new home that has an old piano in it and is drawn to the piano to the point of obsession. The protagonist develops an addiction to playing it due to the influence of an otherworldly entity. That would be an interesting setup and at the very least would be more creative than the stuff you typically see when it comes to haunted house horror movies.
"Demons sound a lot like Taco Bell". Well that got chuckle out of me.
Being forced to live on channel awesome is truly the most terrifying fate
A real jumpscare is, "why did the goblin turn on the stove?"
"Hi, I'm a Possum and I find garbage!!!!"
11:17 The Dawn of the Dead remake is a good example of doing this right. The movie starts out with a fuck ton of urgency and it all feels very serious.
At least this was enough to temporarily forget about Sean Connery's death.
So something about Paige had been distracting me the entire time, even for just the review. It took me until about 2/3 of the video to pin it down. It's how she looks like she could be Cindy's older sister exactly _half_ the time. If she was just a young-looking actress it would be fine. But for reasons I can't explain, she keeps switching between looking like a high school sophomore or junior and then to looking like she's nearing middle age.
Again if she just stayed super young looking I wouldn't spare it a second thought. I don't know if there was a problem with makeup or costuming or whatever, but whatever happened led to a very distracting flip-flop between scenes.
It's very likely it's just me but yeah that bugged me the entire time.
why did the goblin turn on the stove tho
we may one day know why the goblin turned on the stove, but science still denies our attempts to find an answer
To heat up the fireplace poker
@@brianaguilar8283 nah I recently came up with a better explanation, to contribute to global warming a tiny bit more so even more may suffer ever so slightly sooner
@@afrightenedsloth it’s clearly a fireplace poker if you look closely at the shot
The second kitten scare actually got me
am i the only one who thinks that the goblin turned the stove on to heat up the pike that he was gonna stab ppl with
I personally want to see more reviews on just any movies honestly, they don’t always need to be on bad movies, part of the fun is hearing his reaction after you already have you’re own to when you watched the movie.
@@CrisisRadio I’m asking for him to do reviews on more than just the awful movies, it’s fun to see him make fun of stuff, so I’m sure he could judge movies that are considered good even though it’s got a lot of plot holes or something.
Watching Possums in-depth, and comprehensive reviews, has made me visualize and appreciate good movies that much more
I'd love to see you annihilate Dark Harvest...
I literally had a cashier at a gas station basically force the DVD on me, for free, while I was buying a drink or whatever.
...And it didn't even make any tangile sense...
She was like "Oh ya got a Sprite and some Skittles?...Well you also get a free DVD with that."
...Is that even close to relative?
It was like the thing was cursed, and they were lookin for any reason to unload it 🤷🏽♂️
The "Why the Goblin turn on the stove" bit is now the new meme.
I liked how the spirit sounds like a robot when answering "HER ENERGY"
The priest is calling Vatican like: CODE RED, WE GOT A DAFT PUNK HERE. SEND HELP! SEND PRIEST JOHN CONNOR!
Dammit, your jumpscare actually made me jump!!
But the burning question still remains ( no pun intended). Why did the Goblin turn the stove on?
12:35 I knew I recognized that foghorn. They use it for Ork Waaaghs! in Battlefleet Gothic. With that sound ingrained in my head like that, any immersion I had in this movie was sapped away. Careful with those stock sound effects, kids.
I'm still trying to figure out why the Cross of St. Peter is automatically Satanic, instead of you know.. using the Leviathan Cross. It is an insult to the audiences intelligence.
Bad jump scares never fail to make me laugh. It's like the movie briefly turned into a RUclips Poop.
Personally, I believe that one of the best jumpscares is Chara's jumpscare from Undertale.
"So demons work a lot like taco bell" that line killed me. Lmao
"Avenge me"
"I won't"
That got me
You should refer to fake scares as "snake in a box"
Why'd the goblin turn on the stove?
8:44 Two years later and I'm noticing something - that's not a tea pot, it's an Italian stove-top espresso pot. The point of the scene is to demonstrate that she makes coffee in a technically outdated manner (though they're actually pretty common, and I might think that because I use one every day), and along with the land line phone that looks like an old dial phone from the 1940s, but is actually a push button phone from the 1980s, this set of scenes tries to indicate that she is a quirky character who likes anachronistic things. That way we might think she's cool and interesting, but since they half-assed it this character build easily goes unnoticed.
film begins with exact definition of spirit...half hour later...
kid asks "Whats a spirit"
Please compare this with the amazing "Haunting of Hill House", which is a spin on the generic concept making it WAY more interesting.
Why the goblin turned on the stove never was explained
He was heating up the fireplace poker
8:30 you got me with the sound. Speaking of jump-scares, there are only 3 good ones that I can think of off the top of my head; The blood test in The Thing, the severed head in Jaws, and the air vent scene from Alien
I like how he's so angry he doesnt heart comments
h
h
h
h
Nice try
I was lightly Chuckling at the gags in the review but God damn I wasnt ready for the "why did the goblin turn on the stove". I laughed out loud so hard that came in to see if I was okay
Those shots of the car in the beginning remind me a lot of re7.
The interviewer looks like a female WWE wrestler.
You should do Spiral (2019), a Shudder original. It’s supposed to be a social commentary, but social commentaries normally let you organically identify with the issue within the context of the story, but this just slaps you in the face because the writing is terrible, and there’s absolutely no reason it should be classified as a horror movie. It’s 99% boring filler, and the supernatural stuff makes no sense. And the subplots go nowhere at all. And the bad guy cult is cliché (and also makes no sense).
There is quite a bit of stuff on Shudder that isn't horror, and plenty of just awful movies, so it doesn't surprise me.
@@tomoldg I love the fact that Shudder exists, but yeah they definitely gotta work on their lineup. I do really appreciate all the historical stuff they have, like Cursed Films and the insanely long 80’s horror documentary.
@@Hail_Macbeth Shudder is a shitty streaming service
@@brianaguilar8283 Dang bro, that’s crazy how I don’t remember asking.
@@Hail_Macbeth you don’t have to dumbass, it’s a public comment section
Finally, dude! Your reviews are literally welcome every day because they1re some good shite!
5:56 Thanks for reminding me to take out the trash bud. Totally dark outside too 👍
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how did a ghost kill himself??
Very carefully
I don't know how I ever got along without this guy! I've never laughed so hard at ANY movie let alone these. I don't see any point in watching a movie if Possum isn't making fun of it. You're awesome Bro! It's always hilarious when you know so much more about cinematography than the liberal hollywood "elites."
Why is every door and surface of that house smeared in soot or something?
"Demons sound a lot like Taco Bell"
GF Fans: **Vietnam war flashbacks**
Whenever the power goes out I point the flashlight up at the ceiling and it lights up the whole room.
Then integration of plot on the reviews is always amazing dude. Loving your videos as always.
More garbage, possibly Food Fight? A movie that sunk $65 million and possibly made the Voice Actor Charlie Sheen Insane
Nah, it just nade him more insane
Around around 22:35 when he talks about the camera use and filter shutters makes just enjoy Possum even more. I would of noticed or but I appreciate someone who has that level of attention to detail and knowledge on the subject.
Why did the Goblin turn on the Stove, WHY?
Because you sir are a furry.
OOF
To heat up the fireplace poker
You kinda outright said it but i never but two and two together. You barely every have a skit that isn't a Segway into something else, comparing that to channel awesome (its probably insulting to compare anyome to them) your videos jusy feel so much more grounded
He spends 2-3 months making them obviously they’re gonna be good
@@chrisberrios5857 ok commie.
Ok