26 years ago, I became a people pleaser after I got married to be accepted by my husband family. Mostly because he was a people pleaser and I was looked at as his new stuck-up wife. I allowed his family to make subtle backhand remarks and over step my boundaries. I acted like I didn’t notice the disrespect - because I never wanted to be the cause of my husband having a problem with his family. 10 years into our marriage I started telling him to be more watchful whenever they came around - so he could see it for himself. He would say “you tripping” they’re just playing… now it’s 25 years later and I don’t come around at all. I often feel like I betrayed myself for years. I’ve learned to standup for yourself NO MATTER WHO IT IS - in-laws, grandma,sister, brother, aunt, nieces…. I could’ve saved myself I lot of wasted energy.
LOVE THIS SO MUCH ❤️ as I’m approaching my 30’s - i feel like I’m learning this lesson everyday ❤️ no matter WHO it is, i will always stand on integrity & stay true to myself. Not everyone is for ME for a REASON that only god himself knows & the only one who can show me that 💪🏽🌹❤️
Same here . The day I stopped meeting them again my health got better. When I tried to forgive them and started to meet them again, my health and peace went down.
wow, this is disheartening and encouraging as well because I force to become a people pleaser as well. I know those moments when you have to push your authenticity down for fear of spoiling the mood or being the odd one out. It sucks. but Then it became an awful habit and now even when I can talk, I shut up. It's about to change though. I wish you the best fellow people pleasers ! May we conquer our fears and realize that people are not all that they claim to be. They just sell illusions. We deserve to live our real lives, It's a gift.
I’m always worried about making sure that people don’t feel anxious or uncomfortable, because I often feel that way. Shifting your mindset to taking care of yourself first is so hard
@@BellazziEnt Yeah so true. Ironically my mother never did the same for me so I had to constantly watch her feelings and now I do the same with other people. I have no idea how safe spaces can be created without someone acting like this. Are they supposed to only be for very very close friends? At least I’m happy that I’m finally seeing where I’m going wrong thanks to your videos ❤️
“You’re not too sensitive.” THANK YOU for helping me to remove the self-gaslighting glasses! I am sensitive in a self-aware manner, to where it won’t rule me. My intuition is a compass; I am beautifully intuitive; I will honor my intuition and cut off disrespect at its start.💎~
I’m at the point where I don’t even want to listen to music anymore and just have you playing in the background all day so I can rewrite my subconscious programming. Every video you drop is always so timely and relevant to my life ❤
I was raised to never go low because they do … I’m above that… learn to address disrespect with class… and make the group look down on the offender …. Best response ever… covers a multitude of disrespect “ Impoverished households rarely teach manners “ And say it with sincere compassion…Nothing makes a disrespectful person more triggered than having others clock their crazy …I’m literally the worst person on planet earth to ever try that stuff with… I’m hella kind… and having grown up dealing with it … I know it’s their ish.. yet and still if not addressed in a way that has them continually fall on their own sword … they will escalate… which is why I say… stay away from people… the more you interact …the more you taint your goodness with their crazy….i don’t need fake friends enough to put up with rubbish …if you’re on your life purpose …you legit won’t have time
I also have ADHD and its honestly so heart-warming that a fellow neurospicy girl has learned to show up correct in social situations (not by masking your neurodivergent traits but protecting yourself and defending youself from ill spirits )
I’ve had someone cancel plans on me last minute multiple times. I ended up cutting her off. No regrets. I’ve always felt in my intuition that she was two faced. “It’s predator or prey” sooo true! I’ve seen this play out so many times. Yes I am high maintenance ✨💖
I find your content extremely valuable because you discuss real social issues and how to make yourself better off. The pretty girl content is cute, and i do relate however i do appreciate the more indepth videos about behaviors you should adopt or change to cruise through life unbothered.❤
♀️This is a GREAT video. please keep in mind if a person is late to almost everything it has nothing to do with you. Alot of the times its undiagnosed ADD or ADHD you will be able to tell bc its not just you that they do it to. They are late everywhere. So remember to ask questions when it comes down to mental health too!
I just want to thank you for your work. Your videos have helped me and I’m grateful that you are here doing this! I’m 47 and when I was younger there wasn’t RUclips and social media etc. I suffered a lot from not having support or anyone to guide me in life. So I love what you’re doing for women. 💖
Loved this message. I was a HUGE people pleaser however I was betrayed severely and it forced me to look within 😢 I had to learn the hard way Humans are not inherently good! The Bible even teaches that.
Poor ninjas dont respect anything. Tryna make you look dumb is saving them from going mental schizo zombie status. They actually begging for your leadership
I have a question when it comes to respect your own time. 🤔 How do you handle that in regard to your parents? When their need for closeness and connection is higher than yours? Especially since there is a societal expectation where you give in and then it overall feels the connection is an obligation rather than a desire to reconnect. 😅 How does someone gauge this gap?
Setting boundaries with your own parents is one of the most important things you will ever do in life. Think about it, you can cut off friends and get new ones. You can quit a job and start a new one. But you only have one set off parents. You have to prioritize your well-being if you want a healthyrelationshipwiththem. Communicate the amount of time you have available and your boundaries. They may not like it at first, but if they are healthy people, they will come to understand.
@@Thecutest_Giraffe Yeah, but what if you’re like an eremite who could go a whole year not seeing or talking to them? 😅 Not because they treated you bad, but you have nothing in common. 🙄 And not even have interesting topic to talk about.
Purps blame you responding …. I avoid conflict with southern charm… you insult me as a “friend” in public … I’ll apologies for you to that group with a truth … “ please forgive her, she’s going through a lot … her husband left her for the younger woman he’d been sleeping with for at least a decade… how could he do that to her at her age….awful” …. I don’t EVER. Go after anyone … I’m a peaceful person … but if you put your paws on me … you better hold on ….
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26 years ago, I became a people pleaser after I got married to be accepted by my husband family. Mostly because he was a people pleaser and I was looked at as his new stuck-up wife. I allowed his family to make subtle backhand remarks and over step my boundaries. I acted like I didn’t notice the disrespect - because I never wanted to be the cause of my husband having a problem with his family. 10 years into our marriage I started telling him to be more watchful whenever they came around - so he could see it for himself. He would say “you tripping” they’re just playing… now it’s 25 years later and I don’t come around at all. I often feel like I betrayed myself for years. I’ve learned to standup for yourself NO MATTER WHO IT IS - in-laws, grandma,sister, brother, aunt, nieces…. I could’ve saved myself I lot of wasted energy.
Yes people pleasing will have you very angry at yourself once you wake up
LOVE THIS SO MUCH ❤️ as I’m approaching my 30’s - i feel like I’m learning this lesson everyday ❤️ no matter WHO it is, i will always stand on integrity & stay true to myself. Not everyone is for ME for a REASON that only god himself knows & the only one who can show me that 💪🏽🌹❤️
Always stand up for yourself. ❤
Same here . The day I stopped meeting them again my health got better. When I tried to forgive them and started to meet them again, my health and peace went down.
wow, this is disheartening and encouraging as well because I force to become a people pleaser as well. I know those moments when you have to push your authenticity down for fear of spoiling the mood or being the odd one out. It sucks. but Then it became an awful habit and now even when I can talk, I shut up. It's about to change though.
I wish you the best fellow people pleasers ! May we conquer our fears and realize that people are not all that they claim to be. They just sell illusions. We deserve to live our real lives, It's a gift.
I’m learning to stand up for myself and it’s crazy the amount of disrespect I’ve tolerated out of just wanting to be loved.
I’m always worried about making sure that people don’t feel anxious or uncomfortable, because I often feel that way. Shifting your mindset to taking care of yourself first is so hard
Yes this is mommy energy and mommy energy invites disrespect (rebelling)
@@BellazziEnt Yeah so true. Ironically my mother never did the same for me so I had to constantly watch her feelings and now I do the same with other people. I have no idea how safe spaces can be created without someone acting like this. Are they supposed to only be for very very close friends?
At least I’m happy that I’m finally seeing where I’m going wrong thanks to your videos ❤️
Relatable
“You’re not too sensitive.” THANK YOU for helping me to remove the self-gaslighting glasses! I am sensitive in a self-aware manner, to where it won’t rule me. My intuition is a compass; I am beautifully intuitive; I will honor my intuition and cut off disrespect at its start.💎~
You are so welcome! 🤗
I’m at the point where I don’t even want to listen to music anymore and just have you playing in the background all day so I can rewrite my subconscious programming. Every video you drop is always so timely and relevant to my life ❤
So sweet thank you ❤️❤️
I was raised to never go low because they do … I’m above that… learn to address disrespect with class… and make the group look down on the offender …. Best response ever… covers a multitude of disrespect “ Impoverished households rarely teach manners “ And say it with sincere compassion…Nothing makes a disrespectful person more triggered than having others clock their crazy …I’m literally the worst person on planet earth to ever try that stuff with… I’m hella kind… and having grown up dealing with it … I know it’s their ish.. yet and still if not addressed in a way that has them continually fall on their own sword … they will escalate… which is why I say… stay away from people… the more you interact …the more you taint your goodness with their crazy….i don’t need fake friends enough to put up with rubbish …if you’re on your life purpose …you legit won’t have time
I also have ADHD and its honestly so heart-warming that a fellow neurospicy girl has learned to show up correct in social situations (not by masking your neurodivergent traits but protecting yourself and defending youself from ill spirits )
I’ve had someone cancel plans on me last minute multiple times. I ended up cutting her off. No regrets. I’ve always felt in my intuition that she was two faced.
“It’s predator or prey” sooo true! I’ve seen this play out so many times.
Yes I am high maintenance ✨💖
Mistake your kindness for weakness!
I find your content extremely valuable because you discuss real social issues and how to make yourself better off. The pretty girl content is cute, and i do relate however i do appreciate the more indepth videos about behaviors you should adopt or change to cruise through life unbothered.❤
Thank you 🤗
Congrats on ur fast channel success 10k🎉
You're very inspiring
Thank you so much!
Love your channel! Fr teaching me social concepts my parents never taught me and that I am too dense to learn in the real world lol.
Thank you for supporting! You are not alone. I had to learn the hard way too 😭
same
Never insult yourself. The subconscious is listening.
Do you respect yourself?
Yes
Yes, trying to everyday
I'm learning. 💓
Yes! 🩷
I didn’t and now I know that!
Girl you put me to my senses. Self resepct comes first!
Always! ❤️
So glad I’m learning these things at 21 and not later on in life 🥹
❤️❤️❤️
♀️This is a GREAT video. please keep in mind if a person is late to almost everything it has nothing to do with you. Alot of the times its undiagnosed ADD or ADHD you will be able to tell bc its not just you that they do it to. They are late everywhere. So remember to ask questions when it comes down to mental health too!
This is about owning and controlling your space. F those ninjas say no no and NO
I need to watch these videos everyday as my mantra
This video is amazing, such an important message that every young girl needs to see!!!
Thank you! Feel free to share ❤️
@@BellazziEnt yess definitely sending this to my sisters
I just want to thank you for your work. Your videos have helped me and I’m grateful that you are here doing this! I’m 47 and when I was younger there wasn’t RUclips and social media etc. I suffered a lot from not having support or anyone to guide me in life. So I love what you’re doing for women. 💖
You got this! 🤗❤️
🙌YES! Everything u said in this vid is right especially the disrespect in public!!😊🎯💯👍✨
Loved this message. I was a HUGE people pleaser however I was betrayed severely and it forced me to look within 😢 I had to learn the hard way
Humans are not inherently good! The Bible even teaches that.
Finally cut off someone who was so obsessed with their own "peace" that they'd take out any of their issues on me.
Yikes!
This woman is changing my life. 💯 I realized the other day that you have to set the standard for how youre treated.
one of the most important vids ive ever watched, thank u so much!!!
I don't respect myself when l use to prioritize others needs
Another banger 🔥🔥🔥
Thank you
i took notes, thank you for this video
You're so welcome! 🤗
THANK YOU!
You're welcome! 🤗
U right tho I neva thought ab that humans aren’t good 😞 stupid wishful thinking..
Another great video ❤
Thank you 🤗
15:23 "You're not a good person" Gave me whiplash. 😅
I do lack self control and self respect
Poor ninjas dont respect anything. Tryna make you look dumb is saving them from going mental schizo zombie status. They actually begging for your leadership
Like this viewpoint!!!
Some people lose respect for me when l prioritize others
I really should set emotional boundaries
Love your videos❤
Thank you ❤️
You're very inteligente, thanks! 🙏🏻👍🏻
Thank you ❤️
I cut this one off I was too nice.
God bless you for this video.
Thanks 😊 ❤️❤️
I have a question when it comes to respect your own time. 🤔 How do you handle that in regard to your parents? When their need for closeness and connection is higher than yours? Especially since there is a societal expectation where you give in and then it overall feels the connection is an obligation rather than a desire to reconnect. 😅 How does someone gauge this gap?
Setting boundaries with your own parents is one of the most important things you will ever do in life. Think about it, you can cut off friends and get new ones. You can quit a job and start a new one. But you only have one set off parents. You have to prioritize your well-being if you want a healthyrelationshipwiththem. Communicate the amount of time you have available and your boundaries. They may not like it at first, but if they are healthy people, they will come to understand.
@@Thecutest_Giraffe Yeah, but what if you’re like an eremite who could go a whole year not seeing or talking to them? 😅 Not because they treated you bad, but you have nothing in common. 🙄 And not even have interesting topic to talk about.
I really should set clear boundaries
Another thing I learned is when to play dumb and know I’m not stupid
I really should have my self worth and self discovery more self value
I do worry about being like
I'm way too lonely when l am isolated
Thank you 😏
Some use to control my time
I want it someone at my beckon call
I lack self respect
I was lowering my own value
I do got lack self worth
I should want to do something with my life
I really should walk away
I don't know how to be vigilant
2:52 😅 Since we’re talking about respect for someone else’s time. Could you please establish some time stamps in your videos please? 🙏🙏🙏 Thank you.
Purps blame you responding …. I avoid conflict with southern charm… you insult me as a “friend” in public … I’ll apologies for you to that group with a truth … “ please forgive her, she’s going through a lot … her husband left her for the younger woman he’d been sleeping with for at least a decade… how could he do that to her at her age….awful” …. I don’t EVER. Go after anyone … I’m a peaceful person … but if you put your paws on me … you better hold on ….
Walking away makes me more attractive
I think it's hard to live alone l do need to vent to someone
I make alot of excuses
Bella 💖 Beauty 😍 Glow ✨ Getter 💝
Hey beauty ❤️❤️
I neglected my own well being
Sitting! 💚🍵💚
💚
I was such a easy prey
I lack discernment
I'm so stuck up
I'm not all that strong
❤
I'm way too sensitive
Some want to be little me
A game in the jungle wat in the world 🌍
I settled for less
I'm way too sensitive to sentiv
Do you have a pic of yourself?
I like your dress
‼️
😮
Only god can judge me not you or the next person.
I’m not judging you…?
I like your dress