The Worst Guide To Factorio

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  • Опубликовано: 20 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 2,2 тыс.

  • @Trupen
    @Trupen 5 месяцев назад +4574

    This is a well-made guide guide to war crimes!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +339

      I learned from the best ❤️

    • @tomori8946
      @tomori8946 5 месяцев назад +55

      hello factorio man. thank you for teaching us the game

    • @Colorblind77
      @Colorblind77 5 месяцев назад +24

      It's The Guy

    • @Anonymous-mp2ln
      @Anonymous-mp2ln 5 месяцев назад +50

      I don't remember the bugs being a signatory to the Geneva Conventions.

    • @hamzamotara4304
      @hamzamotara4304 4 месяца назад +4

      Why after you subbed to the same people as me?

  • @undercookedbeans4870
    @undercookedbeans4870 5 месяцев назад +557

    'This planet is alive, and I'm going to teach it fear' thats metal af

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +40

      Thanks, just channeling my inner Dethklok 🥰

  • @milotrochez5726
    @milotrochez5726 2 месяца назад +287

    imagine the helldiver going to the factorio planet and finding all the bugs under control by one measly engineer

  • @April_johanson
    @April_johanson 5 месяцев назад +367

    17:17 “SIZE DOES MATTER AND ANYBODY WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE IS A BOTTOM
    AND IM ALWAYS ON TOP OF MY GAME”
    Got me so good omg 😂

    • @abcedefger4251
      @abcedefger4251 5 месяцев назад +25

      ...i-i'm a bottom~ 👀👉👈

    • @mikeydflyingtoaster
      @mikeydflyingtoaster 4 месяца назад +22

      Hang on, wouldn’t a bottom have far more knowledge and experience, being the one most directly affected by the size or lack thereof?

    • @abcedefger4251
      @abcedefger4251 4 месяца назад +14

      @@mikeydflyingtoaster exactly! =w=
      aaaaaaaand also it sounds more like
      "RAIN IS WET AND ANYBODY WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE IS AN UMBRELLA"
      like
      if you are an umbrella
      why in the name of king ludwig the fourteenth's colored striped trousers would you even consider making such a ridiculous counterclaim
      when your entire life experience is telling you the exact opposite of dat
      it just makes no sense. it makes no sense at all. =w=

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +43

      @@abcedefger4251 That's a lot of joke criticsim coming from someone within topping distance.

    • @paulv8773
      @paulv8773 4 месяца назад +1

      I'm pretty sure all the size queens are bottoms so I don't think this quite tracks.

  • @zegreatpumpkinani9161
    @zegreatpumpkinani9161 4 месяца назад +74

    Well you see, as a train person, I never crash into an underground pipe full speed holding W after a... diplomatic expedition, and suddenly wonder why I have no plastic production

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +14

      Damn that's so real, I hate it lol.

    • @jeremylakeman
      @jeremylakeman 3 месяца назад +1

      I only explore by building rail, with radar at the end. Why drive around every rock multiple times when you can just build it once and travel back even faster.

  • @marvinmetellus7919
    @marvinmetellus7919 5 месяцев назад +2851

    At least oxygen is included this time around

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +280

      Right? Easy game for babies.

    • @emdeo
      @emdeo 5 месяцев назад +80

      don't start Space Exploration. don't start Space Exploration. don't

    • @sypeiterra7613
      @sypeiterra7613 5 месяцев назад +18

      Try Pyanadons! Or bobs+angels if you're not too insane

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +85

      RE: Space Exploration... notice how I never touched on multiplayer here? Part 2 isn't out of the question.......

    • @Mr.Sparks.173
      @Mr.Sparks.173 5 месяцев назад +11

      ​@@sypeiterra7613 don't kill the poor man! Even factorio veterans are afraid of Py

  • @AKidWithNoAttitude
    @AKidWithNoAttitude 5 месяцев назад +1286

    You went from Minecraft, to Frostpunk, to Starship Troopers, to I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +168

      I literally based that segment on the last paragraph on IHNMAIMS 🤣

    • @bitflip2
      @bitflip2 Месяц назад +2

      This video is a masterpiece

  • @bobroberto95
    @bobroberto95 5 месяцев назад +738

    "should you play the tutorial? yes. Will it teach you the basics of the game? also yes. will it teach you well? no, that's what trupen is for"
    best line

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +86

      It's not even a joke, it's just a straight up fact lol

    • @Taeolas
      @Taeolas 4 месяца назад +10

      For me it was Nilaus. I was intrigued by the game, got it for Christmas break, tried the Tutorial and couldn't figure out a damn thing. Found Nilaus via DSP, he taught me how to play Factorio and I'm now on an SEK2 run.

  • @Zeus.2459
    @Zeus.2459 3 месяца назад +60

    3:47 "Thermodynamics can suck it"
    Yeah, that's how fuel tends to work...

  • @Coffeepanda294
    @Coffeepanda294 3 месяца назад +72

    The part about the resources being yours reminds me of that joke in Subnautica where your PDA tells you that you must reimburse the corporation that owns the planet you're stranded on for all the resources you consume. "Your current balance stands at 5 million galactic credits"

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 месяца назад +29

      The "just trying to survive" to "I am the megacorp" pipeline in this game is insane.

  • @veryoldpotato
    @veryoldpotato 5 месяцев назад +1759

    Sometimes I wonder what Dosh Doshington would be capable of if Factorio didn't exist.
    I think the world is safer this way.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +307

      P = NP would be solved by now

    • @lis6502
      @lis6502 5 месяцев назад +63

      so i wasn't the only one:D Remember that besides Factorio Dosh has his Zachtronics games, to keep him under control in alternate factorioless universe simply spew more Zachtronics to properly cool his core ^^

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 месяцев назад +50

      Factorio was created to contain Dosh. A traveler from an alternate reality came to our world and made it purely to circumvent the disaster that fell upon his existence.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +8

      @@connorconquers Nah, he'd look at NP and just be like No Problem, P you are the Problem.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +1

      @@lis6502 Zachtronics are decent, but Turing Complete isn't bad either. I have Hard Chip on my waiting list.

  • @Silveryard
    @Silveryard 5 месяцев назад +947

    As a German I almost smiled at that joke 1:18 hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +251

      An almost smile from a German is a huge compliment. Thank you!

    • @CaptainTimo
      @CaptainTimo 5 месяцев назад +14

      I don't understand that joke, could you explain it to me ?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +141

      @@CaptainTimo Germans have historically been a very industrious and productive people. A lot of great engineers also come from Germany. So I'm associating the German peoples with the Factorio engineer who is a seemingly magic beacon of productivity and efficiency.
      Also, German's are culturally a stoic people (not always but culture is culture) so me saying an almost smile is huge is poking fun at that stoic-ness.
      This is all said with a mix jest and respect, of course.

    • @liheg
      @liheg 5 месяцев назад +23

      ​@@connorconquers very industrious and productive indeed. Just the reason, why my 3 months of final exam prep time went right into "JUST BUILD MOOORE" and "THE FACTORY MUST GROOOOOOOOWWWWWW" plus like 4 days of actual doing school stuff. Still passed by quite the long shot. In University by now. And... how can i put that lightly. And FURTHER EXPANDING THE FACTORY 😈😈😈

    • @joelhummel8923
      @joelhummel8923 5 месяцев назад +21

      As a (currently drunk) german I can say that tought the power of beer i slightly smiled

  • @SketchAndEtch
    @SketchAndEtch 5 месяцев назад +319

    This is one of the best Factorio adverts that I've seen and it's not even subtle.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +69

      I really missed my calling as a drug dealer

    • @SketchAndEtch
      @SketchAndEtch 5 месяцев назад +52

      @@connorconquers "Hey!...psst! Hey kid!...wanna build a factory? First warcrime is free"

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +2

      @@SketchAndEtch LMAO!!!

    • @Momi_V
      @Momi_V 3 месяца назад +3

      ​@@SketchAndEtchIf you never stop the genocide it technically only counts as one Warcrime

  • @dagamarvanderkoft3784
    @dagamarvanderkoft3784 4 месяца назад +77

    The use of the FTL soundtrack in the background has absolutely flabbergasted my entire brain

  • @bilskirnir_
    @bilskirnir_ Месяц назад +24

    "I joined the fight against climate change. On the side of pollution."

  • @hrac88
    @hrac88 5 месяцев назад +467

    3 minutes into the video and you deconstructed the space ship
    prepare to be sacrificed to elder gods

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +140

      I have fled the solar system. My crimes will go unpunished.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 месяцев назад +17

      ​@@connorconquersthe Biters will bring justice

    • @lis6502
      @lis6502 5 месяцев назад +8

      Leave him to be sacrificed to the Behemoths ;P aaand enjoy his content until then ^^

  • @davethefoxmage5797
    @davethefoxmage5797 5 месяцев назад +489

    So, as someone with several thousand hours in Factorio... yeah - this is the Factorio experience in a nutshell. Like I can't even call this an exaggeration. Even the megalomaniacal part toward the end.
    ...
    Now, if you'll excuse me, the factory must grow!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +41

      The villain arc is only a very slight exaggeration.

    • @Mr.Sparks.173
      @Mr.Sparks.173 4 месяца назад +10

      There's only one non megalomaniac ending, and that's if you play without biters. Then the ending is just replacing all that ugly green nature stuff with beautiful and wholesome concrete.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +5

      Yeah, and corporations with hundreds to even thousands of engineers and millions or even billions of dollars in revenue and cash flow still can't keep up with our demands. The factory must grow, and we still need the hardware 5 generations from now, right now!

    • @voidshattered
      @voidshattered 3 месяца назад +1

      If... of you need a more chill experience... try satisfactory

  • @Co60-Ni60
    @Co60-Ni60 5 месяцев назад +231

    Every so often I accidentally hit the alt key and wander around my factory wondering why I can’t see

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +29

      THIS HAPPENED SO MANY TIMES

    • @quaker5712
      @quaker5712 5 месяцев назад +4

      Alt-D failed me again!!!

    • @shadefangkweep
      @shadefangkweep 3 месяца назад +2

      This is why I have that rebound to semicolon
      hit that accidentally far less often.

    • @SukacitaYeremia
      @SukacitaYeremia 3 месяца назад +2

      I missed the word "accidentally" reading this and thought you were like those shortsighted guys who took off their glasses as a pastime

  • @kris220b
    @kris220b 4 месяца назад +8

    for trains you basically only need to know:
    1, keep signals and trains on the same side/same direction ( you will need 2 lengths of tracks for a one way system )
    2, anytime there is a start of a split or merger in the tracks, add chain signal(s)
    3, anytime there is the end of a split or merger add normal signal(s)

  • @LifeofBoris
    @LifeofBoris 2 месяца назад +23

    yes

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 месяца назад +6

      Well this is kinda surreal. Thanks for all the great videos. You're a massive inspiration for my cooking and editing. Stay safe out there Slav King 👑

    • @Fannigum
      @Fannigum 2 месяца назад +1

      this comment is the pinnacle of writing, symbolizes the agreement to the better opinion🔥

  • @ThatOliveMrT
    @ThatOliveMrT 5 месяцев назад +359

    'Ratios are important'
    My cursed production line that uses tier 3 prods so it's never truly raito'd; 🗿

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +64

      Most of my builds were, "it works, moving on" lol

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 месяцев назад +10

      if you got the ratio’s correct BEFORE you added modules then if you added the same modules to every machine in the production line then the ratio never actually changed :)

    • @NotaWalrus1
      @NotaWalrus1 5 месяцев назад +9

      @@HexenMeister06 Nope. Ratio for circuits before modules is 3:2 and after modules it's close to 1:1, for instance.

    • @Dawnchaser0
      @Dawnchaser0 4 месяца назад +9

      @@HexenMeister06 This applies for speed, but not productivity, They make alll the rations just broken

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +5

      Don't tell that to Josh. Let's game it out would make a mess of your ratios and still find a way to get it to work.

  • @samkerski
    @samkerski 5 месяцев назад +488

    Hello, train fiend. We're so glad you could join us. Welcome home.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +179

      That bit is based on my actual early thoughts on trains. I have seen the light. I submit to train supremacy

    • @BirbTwig
      @BirbTwig 5 месяцев назад +22

      @@connorconquers Yes, good, we gather another follower.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +5

      @@connorconquers And that's why I truly like Satisfactory as much as this game!

    • @fouadatwi4842
      @fouadatwi4842 4 месяца назад +3

      i like trains

    • @gugre1713
      @gugre1713 4 месяца назад +8

      There aren‘t many things better than factorio trains. Not even drugs compare

  • @BloodyMobile
    @BloodyMobile 5 месяцев назад +120

    Factorio, one of the few legal versions of crack.
    "Will it teach you well? No, that is what Trupen is for" 🤣
    "You're now addicted." - "Inside you are two wolves. One smokes concrete. The other also smokes concrete. You're addicted to concrete."
    And now I want this but for Space Exploration and Krastorio 2. Just because the Factory must grow! Why stop at /one/ planet?
    I also feel like the 19:00 is the prelude to Helldivers 2...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +16

      Accidental Helldivers lore??? This is the planet the terminids started on 💀💀💀

    • @TheNevar18
      @TheNevar18 5 месяцев назад +4

      @@connorconquers Considering the bugs used to drop Alien Science, this isn't far off...

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 месяцев назад +2

      For Democracy!

    • @SukacitaYeremia
      @SukacitaYeremia 3 месяца назад +2

      @@connorconquers Helldivers? yea sure. What about accidental factorio lore though? Like, the respawn mechanism? Are you like doctor whos that reanimates themselves as a different self while still being the same character but retaining the memories of your past manifestations? Does that impair your memories of who you were and where you came from before? Who granted you that power? Is it the same thing that caused your ship to crash?

    • @gratuitouslurking8610
      @gratuitouslurking8610 3 месяца назад +2

      The ironic part is the 'why stop at one planet' is exactly what the main Factorio devs are working on too.

  • @5Davideo
    @5Davideo 8 дней назад +4

    Says it's the worst guide, actually pretty reasonable.
    Also re: that particular rant at the imprisoned biter nest: in the new expansion, you can enslave them and put them to work *in* your factory.

  • @VerticalBaconSandWch
    @VerticalBaconSandWch 3 месяца назад +15

    the fucking quality of this video; the editing, the writing, the narration, choice of score, fucking everything made me assume this channel had at least 10 million subs. Extremely underrated creator. You've earned my sub.

  • @HexenMeister06
    @HexenMeister06 5 месяцев назад +64

    pro tip: every ratio is just the crafting times, with the ingredients’ multiplied by the amount required by the product.
    example:
    a green circuit requires 3 copper coils, both take 0.5 seconds to craft, multiply 0.5 by 3 you get 1.5, the ratio of green circuits to copper coils is 1:1.5, since you cant build half an assembly machine you round up to 2:3
    red science requires one iron gear and one copper plate, you get the copper plate from smelting but iron gears you need to craft via assembly machine, iron gears take 0.5 seconds but red science takes 5 seconds, so ONE iron gear assembly machine will meet the demand of TEN red science assembly machines.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +15

      I'm tempted to pin this incase my subpar explanation scared anyone off lol

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 месяцев назад +7

      @@connorconquers took me 400 hours till i figured this one trick out and ive never seen anyone mention it anywhere else. most youtubers just say “once you get the ratios down” and don’t elaborate. this trick also is a life savor for mods like space exploration.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 месяцев назад +2

      mother of god

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 месяцев назад +2

      i feel like i poorly explained this trick and have edited it accordingly. looking back i found holes in the math and should point them out. originally i forgot to mention _how_ to multiply the crafting times, hope its more clear.

    • @fabienherry6690
      @fabienherry6690 5 месяцев назад +5

      Productivity module : allow me to introduce myself !

  • @TheKirby117
    @TheKirby117 5 месяцев назад +86

    watched up to "and to do this we're going to become more obsessed with belts than an anime protagonist, so that we can accomplish more insertions than a sounding enthusiast" and knew you were the one; brilliant writing (thus far; don't let me down from here)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +24

      That's by far the most cursed sentence I've ever constructed. Hope you liked the rest of the vid!

    • @christoefur944
      @christoefur944 5 месяцев назад +15

      ​@@connorconquers more cursed than "inflate harder than a furry trying to make rent"?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +6

      @@christoefur944 A close second lol

    • @9clawtiger
      @9clawtiger 5 месяцев назад +5

      I learned a new word today.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +6

      Hah, I'm so sorry.

  • @rubyeyed756
    @rubyeyed756 5 месяцев назад +99

    That slander against walling, UNCALLED FOR. I like fortresses and so should everyone else.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +18

      Well tbf I did wall in my entire base before I learned my lesson lol

    • @an_asp
      @an_asp 5 месяцев назад +11

      I feel like walling in your base becomes much better once you have construction robots and blueprints, so you can easily pick up your wall and move it somewhere else for expansion. Tileable blueprints can be especially nice.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +9

      Oh 100%. Having to take them down manually is brutal.

    • @sea_kerman
      @sea_kerman 5 месяцев назад +3

      @@connorconquersthe true answer is to make your wall huge to start out with.

    • @leobastian_
      @leobastian_ 5 месяцев назад +1

      They arent very functional but by good are they nice to look at

  • @Tinyuvm
    @Tinyuvm 5 месяцев назад +58

    "Nothing is so permanent as a Starter base", Milton Friedman

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +8

      ooft, right in the truth

    • @Mirekluk
      @Mirekluk 4 месяца назад +4

      ​@@connorconquersthe atarter base experience " i will keep you so I can expand more easily, but not make dedicated new and sexy base with your produce"

    • @victorcaldera249
      @victorcaldera249 3 месяца назад +2

      If it doesn’t have concrete and lamps its not a real base its a starter base - Doshdoshington

  • @Th3_W01f
    @Th3_W01f 3 месяца назад +13

    One of the fun parts about Seablock is when you finish the game winning research, it gives you a question "Wanna do it again? With two options "Hell yeah" and "No I want my mommy" which is rather appropriate.

  • @unhappyllamaz
    @unhappyllamaz 5 месяцев назад +145

    It's wild that endgame bases kinda look like circuit boards.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +51

      That seems to happen with every factory game after a while

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 месяцев назад +22

      It's all input-outputs with a slightly different flavor applied to it.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 месяца назад +7

      And then there is this: ruclips.net/video/Y9xi0V71G08/видео.html so not every factory game or playthrough results in looking like a circuit board.

    • @ax14pz107
      @ax14pz107 29 дней назад +1

      All hail the mighty gradient. Time is flow, flow is change, change is existence.

    • @pallarandersvisa1906
      @pallarandersvisa1906 21 день назад

      Mine didn't - for the first time. Didn't watch any tutorials, didn't build main bus, it was all spaghetti and I launched the rocket :)

  • @celem12
    @celem12 5 месяцев назад +118

    HBomberGuy Flashbang

  • @josevictor6133
    @josevictor6133 5 месяцев назад +57

    Factorio: A game where automation meets "I have no mouth and I must scream"

  • @Issenthevampire
    @Issenthevampire 4 месяца назад +12

    "This planet is alive and I'm going to teach it fear" Goes SO fucking hard.
    That train bit was incredible as well.

  • @AaronC.
    @AaronC. 4 месяца назад +33

    List of games that I'd love to see guides for:
    Rimworld.
    Mindustry.
    Project Zomboid.
    Terraria.
    Vintage Story.
    Love the content!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +20

      @@AaronC. I do love Terraria and I've thought about making a guide for it before. Glad to know there is interest!

    • @VayaKahvi
      @VayaKahvi 3 месяца назад +3

      I second that call for Rimworld!

    • @Superboy-jx3zv
      @Superboy-jx3zv 2 месяца назад +1

      I also recommend Cities Skylines, Transport Fever 2 and Workers and Recources Soviet Republic, because notings more fun than to see a 80% population alcohol addiction

    • @m4rcyonstation93
      @m4rcyonstation93 2 месяца назад +3

      rimworld is peak

  • @umbra4540
    @umbra4540 5 месяцев назад +166

    "anyone who tells you otherwise is a bottom" au contraire, my friend. have you never heard of a size queen?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +40

      😳

    • @Xeridanus
      @Xeridanus 4 месяца назад +1

      They're not going to tell you that size doesn't matter though.

  • @nightbot6415
    @nightbot6415 5 месяцев назад +56

    21:02 The fact that you have catagorized some games in the folder uncatagorized made me burst out laughing.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +26

      In case you're curious, it contains: TES IV (Oblivion), Factorio, Helldivers 2, Magicraft, OTXO, Ravenswatch, Rollercoaster Tycoon Delux, Super Hexagon, Terraria, and Vtuber Studio.
      I have no idea why I've done this.

    • @123890antonioj
      @123890antonioj 2 месяца назад +3

      ​@@connorconquers Clearly you suffer from an envious diversity of games to the point of putting Factorio and Terraria in the same 'misc' bin lmao

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 месяца назад +2

      @@123890antonioj well I've been in the game industry for a while now and I'm kinda passionate about it lol 😅

  • @Wrulfy
    @Wrulfy 5 месяцев назад +2661

    "I learned Lua out of spite and made a mod to be gay and select pronouns" thats just brilliant

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +501

      This is what happens when I'm left alone with Visual Studio

    • @LordsSky
      @LordsSky 5 месяцев назад +63

      Absolutely legendary.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 месяцев назад +109

      Mega based

    • @MediaMunkee
      @MediaMunkee 5 месяцев назад +45

      Infinitely more effective than parroting "hit that subscribe button".

    • @RoamingAdhocrat
      @RoamingAdhocrat 5 месяцев назад +173

      in my experience, being fuelled by spite is the only way to get anything done in Lua

  • @bucket236
    @bucket236 2 месяца назад +10

    15:44 This is the hardest "The Factory Must GROW" I've ever heard

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 месяца назад +6

      I had to record that part in my car in the middle of nowhere cuz I didn't want to yell in my apartment 😅

    • @bucket236
      @bucket236 2 месяца назад +3

      @@connorconquers I'm just imagining someone seeing you yell out "THE FACTORY MUST GROW" into the microphone and wondering "What the hell is this guy doing?" This must've looked hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Месяц назад +1

      Oh I did the full monologue in there. And I took video of it cuz I knew I looked insane. It'll probably be in the "year in review" video lol

    • @TheToric
      @TheToric Месяц назад

      ​@@connorconquersmaster boot record/keygen church was an excellent choice for this bit.

    • @ThomasWinget
      @ThomasWinget 12 дней назад

      @@connorconquers Hello from November, looking forward to this. Also Space Age exists now...

  • @Liam-fd4uh
    @Liam-fd4uh 11 дней назад +3

    "This planet is alive and I'm going to teach it fear" is genuinely one of the hardest quotes I've ever heard holy shit

  • @tiberiusstaicu7853
    @tiberiusstaicu7853 5 месяцев назад +15

    ambiguous amphibian led me down a dark path , the factorio pipeline , its mostly an underground pipeline with many others intersecting it .

  • @mustakragen6103
    @mustakragen6103 5 месяцев назад +90

    Ah, heavy drugs advertised in a plain sight, love it!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +16

      I feel like I missed my calling as a drug dealer

  • @thehansboi
    @thehansboi 5 месяцев назад +7

    oh my god i love how it went from simple beginnings to chaotic scaling, it's funny how this is both informational and insanity, amazing video.
    makes me wanna play the game myself but it doesn't have the same addictive effect to me like others experienced, that rock and stone game on the other hand...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      Glad you liked it! I need to get back on DRG. Helldivers 2 got me hooked tho.

  • @michaelmedvedskiy7449
    @michaelmedvedskiy7449 3 месяца назад +7

    The performance on 15:20 is very expressive, translates the desire to own this world colourfully, loved it

    • @michaelmedvedskiy7449
      @michaelmedvedskiy7449 3 месяца назад +2

      Re-listening it over an over, it’s mine, this masterpiece is mine!!

  • @GreaterD
    @GreaterD 4 месяца назад +10

    There is no better feeling then remembering that you have a hundreds of kilometres long wall lined with autoreloading artillery , a tool to tell them where to shoot, and a target rich environment

  • @ImNedA12
    @ImNedA12 5 месяцев назад +65

    oh my god a huniepop video would actually be hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +30

      I have a script started for it 👀

    • @jcj94brony
      @jcj94brony 5 месяцев назад +7

      ​@@connorconquers Do. It.

    • @taroasukai2840
      @taroasukai2840 3 месяца назад +1

      @@connorconquers OMG please do it!!

  • @VoiceOfDistortion
    @VoiceOfDistortion 5 месяцев назад +147

    PROJECT MOON MENTIONED

    • @MrBurningGarbage
      @MrBurningGarbage 5 месяцев назад +16

      worst guide to lobotomy corporation when

    • @pavoazul4439
      @pavoazul4439 5 месяцев назад +9

      The voices are getting louder

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +38

      It's on my radar 👀

    • @KasseCoronet6556
      @KasseCoronet6556 5 месяцев назад +5

      @@connorconquers I'll be genuinely impressed if you can manage to get good at those games. Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina is like if a management sim and a card battler had the depth and difficulty of a Zachtronics game.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +10

      @@KasseCoronet6556 Okay that sounds like exactly my shit. Also, when has being good at a game ever been a requirement for me making a video about it 😉

  • @gingerbread2771
    @gingerbread2771 5 месяцев назад +23

    The train switcheroo was a masterpiece and it somehow only got better afterwards. I kinda wish you included a segment about some of the batshit mods like pyanodons and SE but I can see why you didn't. Great video mate, can't wait to see this channel explode into the stratosphere.

    • @Robplayswithdragons
      @Robplayswithdragons 3 месяца назад

      in the list where we showed a few mods, py was a few down.. so he may have at least tried it for funzies lol

  • @PendragonDaGreat
    @PendragonDaGreat 5 месяцев назад +6

    Your inability to not laugh at "Get in the robot Engi" is part of why I love this series so much.

  • @olafboer3435
    @olafboer3435 4 месяца назад +5

    15:34 is just- beautiful. I was wondering where our catchphrase had been before then. Glad that you've seen the truth. Welcome to the factory

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад

      Had to give it the gravity it deserved. But wait... if we're here... who's growing our factories???

    • @olafboer3435
      @olafboer3435 4 месяца назад +1

      @@connorconquers oh I'm playing Factorio while typing :] it was very cathardic to hear you take up our warcry. I keep replaying it

  • @yuraneroba66
    @yuraneroba66 5 месяцев назад +22

    0:43 - it's Kyiv Polytechnic Institute, I used to study there, lol ;)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +5

      Hah, I just used some random stock video for that. I love when stuff like this gets spotted.

    • @jenko_kov
      @jenko_kov 12 дней назад

      Basically our Ukrainian place to teach new cracked people and prep them to be VERY EFFICIENT in their factories

  • @AnYEntertainment
    @AnYEntertainment 5 месяцев назад +8

    Average German here - can confirm: Eating and drinking is optional for us, but we do it anyways, because we really like beer
    Looking forward to grading your homework - I have... 'studied' the subject matter myself plenty...
    Looking forward to whatever comes next!

  • @chronicnightmare.
    @chronicnightmare. 5 месяцев назад +20

    that ending is a nice reference of I have no mouth and i must scream, but this time you are AM.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +4

      I'm so happy so many people are getting the reference considering how much I curbed from the last paragraph of that story lol

  • @Zeratultheking
    @Zeratultheking 4 месяца назад +3

    You managed to capture the entire factorio arc in 20 min. Well done! Definitely going to check out more of your stuff as this is extremely well made!

  • @Cepuminator
    @Cepuminator 4 месяца назад +8

    Was not expecting Keygen Church, but man, does it work so well.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +6

      I pretty much came up with that segment and scripted the video around it lol

  • @hillybanson
    @hillybanson 5 месяцев назад +10

    I came for the factorio video. I stayed for the 'I have no mouth and I must scream' prequel that it became.

  • @COWHATE
    @COWHATE 26 дней назад +4

    17:25 "Get in the robot Engi" is perfect

  • @vbcoder42
    @vbcoder42 2 месяца назад +5

    started with your noita vid (despite having hundreds of hours, the title got me) and immediately binged the rest of your channel.
    spot on humor and pretty infromative. very cool that you link other channels too, also good taste in music lol.
    keep it up 👍

  • @Audey
    @Audey 4 месяца назад +7

    As a long time factorio player, this is a piece of art that speaks an ineffable "WHAT AM FACTORIO?" into existence. And while it may not teach a new player how to to play the game, it baptizes them in the everlasting and unspeakable waters of THE RATIO. For whatsoever passes, one thing is known: The Factory. Must. Grow.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +2

      That's kinda what I go for with all my "guides"
      It's more, "you should play this game and here's some stuff you should know and how to get started." Basically an ad with extra steps lol

  • @affanalam6123
    @affanalam6123 5 месяцев назад +15

    Thank you Connor, now I can start my 173rd playthrough of the game.

  • @zacharys8141
    @zacharys8141 2 месяца назад +4

    “It’s just my starter base” has got to be my favorite excuse for any horrendous design

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 месяца назад

      I can justify so many design crimes with this

  • @lis6502
    @lis6502 5 месяцев назад +4

    as a seasoned player i really approve this guide. I've seen Trupen's films being way worser than this xD. In all seriousness you've covered everything to reflect what this game is. Ratios are especially neglected by authors of "how i built my starter base in 100hrs". A+ my friend

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      Thank you! I always try to capture that essence that makes a game special and this was a hard one because there's SO MUCH. Figuring out what NOT to cover was so damn tough.

  • @Deneb626
    @Deneb626 5 месяцев назад +5

    The first thing I notice is First Trumpet in the background.
    I am now morally obliged to keep watching.

  • @dogwithswag
    @dogwithswag 5 месяцев назад +2

    Man this was an amazing video, well edited, funny and engaging. Really surprised at the level of quality on display here, keep up the good work.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +1

      Thanks! I'm learning more with each one!

  • @PoisoNico93
    @PoisoNico93 5 месяцев назад +12

    Did not expect to hear the word sounding in a Factorio video but it got a chuckle from me

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      One day I will be punished for my sins.

    • @PoisoNico93
      @PoisoNico93 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@connorconquers Oh and thank you for linking your music choices in the description. I had forgotten the OTXO OST exists

  • @liveen
    @liveen 5 месяцев назад +5

    From 14:50 up to 15:53 I ended up realizing I'm watching the same dude who convinced me to try Noita. Holy shit that feeling

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      "Oh shit its the time-sink game guy! I gotta get outta here!"

  • @wollwolke
    @wollwolke 5 месяцев назад +3

    This really encapsulates the classic descent into madness in Factorio. Especially the use of Keygen Church at 15:27 works so well, I love it

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад

      I was so afraid it wasn't gonna work. So happy it seems to have!

    • @leakingamps2050
      @leakingamps2050 2 месяца назад

      which song was this?

    • @raizors1331
      @raizors1331 9 дней назад

      ​@@leakingamps2050
      Tenebre Rosso Sangue - KEYGEN CHURCH
      Or, if you are an Ultrakill player, it's "The epic song that plays when you are about to get absolutely humbled"

  • @JayDayKay
    @JayDayKay Месяц назад +2

    8:51 wasn’t all too convinced until I watched you place down like 6 turrets directly in front of enemies and just manually load them up with ammunition to spit out in .5 seconds. I think I should play factorio

  • @sorbpen
    @sorbpen Месяц назад +1

    "I'm simply here to tickle your neurons and lure you into a life ruining addiction" - style videos are what this game needs.
    And you did a great job, got me to put this on my to play-list, after i finish satisfactory.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Месяц назад

      I can't wait to get into Satisfactory. Will probably do a guide on it sometime next year.

  • @MakroneFaun
    @MakroneFaun 4 месяца назад +5

    Not a single day has gone by where I don't see one of my fellow Germans building a gigantic factory.

  • @SephirothsBIade
    @SephirothsBIade 5 месяцев назад +4

    6:12 Most accurate description of channel yet.
    It works... I now understand more about Finnish alchemy than I ever expected to learn.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      I'm secretly an eldritch entity that consumes people's productivity 🥰

  • @MarcoTross-dz7rh
    @MarcoTross-dz7rh 5 месяцев назад +5

    The lobotomy corporation os5 goes unbelievably hard (incredible video as always)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +2

      I really should play that game. And thanks!

  • @SukacitaYeremia
    @SukacitaYeremia 3 месяца назад +1

    This guy could script and publish a video around Zisteau cursing Factorio's autosave, and through sheer shock and awe cause youtube to triple in company profits over a fortnight.
    Spectacular video! You're incredibly lucky and absolutely the perfect person to have made this video at this space and time.
    I'm sorry that it'll all be downhill from now on though.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 месяца назад

      Lol thanks. I've got some big plans still so let's hope it's not downhill lol

  • @vladspellbinder
    @vladspellbinder 3 месяца назад +2

    So, some funny jokes throughout but the one at 15:56 made me literally laugh out loud so thanks for that.
    I've sort of bounced on the tutorial of all things. I don't know what it is, I want to get sucked into this game but don't while Satisfactory didn't let me go for over a year.
    Thanks for the video.

  • @christopherschneider2968
    @christopherschneider2968 5 месяцев назад +6

    That point about programming is something another video i saw made, so i knew were you going with that. I finished Factorio multiple times before i saw my first tutorial video. Boy i did so much wrong! Thats also the difference between self thought programming and properly thought programming...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +3

      I'm a university educated software engineer and professional AAA game dev. I'm still bad at programming 💀

    • @christopherschneider2968
      @christopherschneider2968 5 месяцев назад +2

      @@connorconquers My experience with python 3 are CodeCombat and the "Yet Another Roguelike Tutorial - Written in Python 3 and TCOD" were are not the same! Jokes aside i love your videos, as you said you are a game dev and your vids are the best reviews hands down. Professional standpoint, peak humor and not being a right wing douchebag are the reason i unsubscribed from other reviewers.

  • @LiIBeary
    @LiIBeary 5 месяцев назад +12

    Ayo, its time for my favorite series
    The Worst Guides by Connor Conquers!

  • @Chounoo
    @Chounoo 5 месяцев назад +9

    I love your narrative style. It really feels like how you would approach a game for the first time and improve on each iteration. Thanks for the new addiction

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +4

      That's actually exactly how I approached this video. All the other ones were games I already had a ton of experience with. After the Noita video I realised how much better a narrative through line makes things. So since I had less experience with this game I tried to lean on the first time learning experience more and build on that. I wasn't sure if it worked well but it seems to be going well!

    • @Chounoo
      @Chounoo 5 месяцев назад

      @@connorconquers It definitely makes the videos entertaining to watch and makes me want to play the games. Wish you all the success, you definitely deserve it

  • @zonolith5912
    @zonolith5912 12 дней назад +1

    "The Factory MUST GROW"
    Unironically a hardcore battle cry.

  • @ja3802
    @ja3802 17 дней назад +1

    A wonderful, inspirational story about a man learning to overcome his trainsphobia, 10/10

  • @shubhan2002
    @shubhan2002 2 месяца назад +4

    "After the successful crash hit alt"
    Oh man i realised how big of a deal it was when I reached mission 5 😂

  • @Colorblind77
    @Colorblind77 5 месяцев назад +4

    Also Connor, you're awesome and keep up the good content, I'm willing to wait

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад

      Awww thanks. I'm slow with these scripts but I'm glad people think they are worth it

  • @maxmasher2597
    @maxmasher2597 5 месяцев назад +11

    Conveyor belts, nukes, and an unhealthy amount of optimization? I think I should play factorio

  • @adamh1228
    @adamh1228 13 дней назад +2

    "what if i just build one train" right into a fugue state.. totally relatable

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  13 дней назад +1

      The rate at which I actually went from "trains are dumb" to "how can I build my entire base around these divine creations" was startling even to me.

    • @adamh1228
      @adamh1228 13 дней назад

      @@connorconquers i probably played my first 1000 hrs without making trains, and now its the first thing i shoot for. now when i play multiplayer with my brother, we just text each other "TRAINS?"

  • @miss_bec
    @miss_bec 3 месяца назад +1

    Hey memes aside this video is god damn amazing. The pacing is perfect, the editing is perfect, the jokes are fucking great. It's like a Maxor video but i have functional retinas by the end.

  • @Haidex_
    @Haidex_ 5 месяцев назад +4

    this is literally the "sell seashells on a seashore" meme luigi sings but the guide for factorio awesome

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад

      I've created biter scarcity. Buy now...

  • @shlrup6154
    @shlrup6154 5 месяцев назад +20

    i literally said "oh yes" under my breath when i saw the notification

  • @tarrker
    @tarrker 4 месяца назад +3

    Factorio is one of those games that is what you make of it. It's only complicated if you make it complicated.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад +1

      It's a 'lil complicated. But yeah, I like to overcomplicate things lol

  • @MarcusDolby
    @MarcusDolby 18 часов назад +1

    This video has two of my favorite things: Factorio and war crimes

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 часов назад

      I can't wait to do so much worse to the biters in the DLC.

  • @loveisinportant5570
    @loveisinportant5570 4 месяца назад +1

    Genuinely one of the best RUclips videos I've seen in a long while. The title and premise don't do it justice, this was truly a journey to behold. Fantastic work. I know what video to go to when recommending Factorio henceforth.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 месяца назад

      Thanks! Glad you liked it. Good luck getting other into this fantastic life-ruining addiction!

  • @droz74
    @droz74 3 месяца назад +3

    Opening the video with a "Warning" from Lob Corp... well I know what guide I'm getting into here...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 месяца назад +1

      I just liked the song lol. I had no idea the PTSD storm I was unleashing. And now I own the game as a result 👀

  • @fremenondesand3896
    @fremenondesand3896 22 дня назад +6

    Kovarex is a pretty normal guy. I like him.
    Factorio is a lot of fun.

  • @gypseetim
    @gypseetim 5 месяцев назад +6

    you forgot to mention speedrun masters AntiElitz and Nefrums
    great video :D

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +7

      I'm trying to trick people into playing, not scare them away with peak gameplay. The un-factorio'ed mind can't handle that out the gate.

  • @BlindSpectet
    @BlindSpectet Месяц назад +1

    These videos are genius! you watch them for the first time and buy the game, then after playing the game for an unhealthy sum of time you watch it again and it’s even funnier

  • @tylerdelange5959
    @tylerdelange5959 17 дней назад +1

    Music going from FTL->Darktide->Ultrakill->OTXO->Doom was not expected, but damn you've got good taste

  • @wygiwyg
    @wygiwyg 5 месяцев назад +4

    i discovered your channel today and watched all videos, please keep up the work. Love it

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад

      Thank! Glad you're enjoying. I think I'm doing Path of Exile next.

  • @digiholic
    @digiholic 5 месяцев назад +10

    Man this guy just consistently keeps posting exactly my taste in games. I feel like we'd be good friends.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 месяцев назад +6

      I just like games that are spreadsheets in disguise

  • @davidklassen5143
    @davidklassen5143 Месяц назад +3

    "Foreshadowing is a literary device-" killed me

  • @kris123o
    @kris123o 6 дней назад +2

    With the new 2.0 patch and DLC the game turned from pure crack to some insane concoction created by a mad scientist.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 дней назад +1

      I know! I can't wait to go back lmao

    • @kris123o
      @kris123o 3 дня назад +1

      @@connorconquers I hope you make a new video for space age. I also wanted to say I love your videos. I found your channel thanks to quinn69's video of him reacting to your PoE one showing up in my recommended. Ended up sharing this one and the PoE one with some friends afterwards as they're just that good.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 дня назад +1

      @@kris123o I'm thinking of doing a co-lab for Space Age. I'm pretty sure I'm making a part 2 for this guide.

    • @kris123o
      @kris123o 3 дня назад +1

      @@connorconquers Oh? Anyone in specific? And that's awesome. I love the way your videos are structured so even if it's not a guide I could see a more playthrough type video working well with your editing style. It reminds me of another youtuber but I'm unfortunately blanking on the name at the moment.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  15 часов назад

      I'm debating between getting someone good to carry me or getting several other trash players and fumbling thru it lol

  • @CurtisJensenGames
    @CurtisJensenGames 3 дня назад +2

    14:50 THE FACTORY MUST GROW

  • @thedocblock6421
    @thedocblock6421 5 месяцев назад +3

    Setting the unrestricted, uncontrolled growth of industrialization to the song Tenebre Rosso Sangue is a combo that is much more fitting than I had thought. Well edited, fine sir.