Dont waste your time trying to make a woman re-respect you. Save your energy to create a stronger frame with a new person and learn from your past mistakes.
@@wBrewsterboyjr92 stay strong. I know how hard it is . Its the best thing that ever happened to me . She left me after being the kindest most loving husband. Dropped 100 pounds became much more attractive physically, mentally. And i am with much better women. In fact she is trying to get me back now. You become a real man only through discomfort and pain. Once you have tons of options the tides turn . Hang in there my friend
@@AhmedTarek-s9mthats a dangerous statement though because it tells people “ the other person is always in the wrong” & imo its a little narcissistic of you to think one person ruined the relationship when its 50/50. I don’t know you, but I can 100% guaranteed you that you were not as innocent & perfect as you think you wwre & hopefully you don’t bring that thought pattern Into your new relationship, or I can pretty much promise it will also not work out. Good luck man. Just saying it from experience.
This works 💯 a) if she comes back, its a win you now have her full attention as she will be in her best behavior b) if she doesn't come back, its a win, you just lost a problem and a time waster in your life
I feel there is a 50/50 chance she will continue in her past behavior if you allow her back. There is a 100% chance that you will no longer experience her bad behavior if you STAY away. Did she apologize? Is she returning because she's desperate? Is she trying to improve herself with counseling, a 12 step program of even watching moral, ethical you tube videos about healthy relationship behavior and excitedly share with you her insights into her bad behavior AND apologize?
100% Just did this myself to a dude who probably thinks I'm not serious about it due to these stupid videos (ignore her most of the time, threaten to leave, walk away to get her back -- NO). Don't get with people who don't value you and make it very visibly clear they like you and want to get to know you, and make you part of their live by sharing their moments and aspirations. Man or woman, just walk. Nobody owns you; you aren't property. If you're in a relationship and you don't feel secure, talk to your partner--you're an adult, FFS, communicate!
@@blindscrubshots Agree completely how stupid these videos are. I think 1% of people try these techniques and that's the 1% with psycho tendancies. Or kids who are easily manipulated.
What I've learned is that it's hard for people to change. Even if you do get her to come back, she's just going to be her old self doing the same toxic behavior that caused you to walk away in the first place. You got to walk away and stay away from her. Your dignity and self-respect will be intact and you will gain confidence in yourself for doing something that most guys are not able to do.
I walked away about 3 months ago. Was dating a Dismissive Avoidant woman and after she canceled on me 4 straight dates i made the decision to leave. Time boundaries are at the top for me and once my time wasn't being appreciated, I'll stop giving it. Told her I'd give her the space she needed and let her take care of her priorities. I do miss her at times but I'm happier now self improving and focusing on myself. I'm currently hitting the gym 6 days a week, getting in the best shape I've ever been. Level up guys💪
@@ahmadelshbasy3222his reasons are his own. But I presume that walking away is a powerful strategy due to respect that this action commands. Besides, it appears to me that it's a rare occurence for some women to be given a cold shoulder. If a man walks away he immediately stands out from the crowd
The one thing that i learned from all woman i've been with it's don't waste your Time trying re-respect you, go find another girl deserve you more & respect you & love you more
I have walked away to conserve my well being. She may respect me for it but I won't be going back to her. I'd rather teach her a lesson that when you find a good man, don't disrespect him. Better luck next time darling 🤞
Thankyou man She came back to me after a month really wanting to remain friends after a yr relationship I told her no and lovingly wished her all the best.I don't regret it but am missing her but know deep down I wasn't prepared to be disrespected or waked over by her over controlling and bratish behaviour I chose peace but the loss hurts...
@@gra6799good 💩. Those residual situationdhips after the breakup are just them trying to have something while they’re looking for something new to move on. Just leave from the jump. Not to hurt them, but to assert your self respect.
When someone disrespect a person means that is the real personality, walk away for your dignity and peace of mind, never take back someone that disrespect you .
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me, I still love her and most times i cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, I love her so much, i don't know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her.
Why worry over a spill milk when you own the factory.you own the entire universe nothing can stop the power of your mind and your abundance mindset cheers man
Same situation it’s horrible and so frustrating to be still so attached while she has moved on and I question why I am obsessing and can’t stop when I know she filed for divorce and has washed her hands of me. It’s a mindfuck can’t live like this have to somehow snap out of it and get confidence back and try and find happiness again. Daunting
Very good advice. More young men need to start doing this and not be afraid of losing the girl. This is the only way the world will heal. Right now men everywhere are weak and it has never been more apparent.
And you think men are strong today? You GenZers haven’t even learned to play outside yet…at least millennials did some. Yes men are weak, grip strength, and testosterone is at it’s lowest in history and our generations have never seen a war like our fathers and grandfathers did. Men today need to have a backbone and quit being simpified.
Staying away is a 100% guarantee that you will no longer be manipulated by her bad behavior. If you allow her back you have a 50/50 chance of her bad behavior returning. If without prompting, she apologizes for her bad behavior you may have better odds. If she is working on her bad behavior with a counselor or 12 step program and apologizes without prompting, you may want to give her one more chance.
I make full damn sure ANY woman I interact with in a relationship mode sees me interacting with other women. The message is obvious - I have choices, I will be the one doing the choosing, YOU have no power over that, and if YOU want something more from a relationship, YOU level up, I am already where I need to be.
Always walk. Always, and keep it moving. The funny thing once you go no contact often that person will reach out but keep it moving.Don’t ask or for ask an explanation, no closure just walk away.
that is the most brutal form of walking away which will result in the highest likelyhood of the other person reaching back out and trying to come back. IMO. Because it is giving the least effort / most apathy.
this is wonderful advice for anyone who felt abandoned by parents at a young age and experiences strong feelings of fear and anxiety when they fall in love. if you've made a genuine connection with someone and they are pulling you in and pushing you back away repeatedly, then it's important to break this cycle, not only for the sake of getting her respect back, but also for your mental health. share your feelings with friends and loved ones to avoid making any desperate moves with her, and show her how well you can handle a difficult situation by being disciplined and stoic. previously i would let my feelings of abandonment take control, turning them inward and becoming a mess, or alternatively burning a bridge over my time not being valued and ending the relationship pre-emptively. what i was scared to do was maturely communicate my concerns, express a need for time to step back and re-evaluate the situation, and focus on my own well-being while keeping that door open for her. to heal from your past trauma, you have to act against instinct and let the good things that come from that reenforce a new pattern of behavior within yourself. you can change. you can heal.
U just described my whole life since childhood and all my relationships up until now it’s time for a change for me I’m done being so codependent and needy just lost the best girl I’ve ever had because of my codependent behavior and I know if she ever comes back I will be a different man not a bad guy but a stoic guy that’s unfazed by the things she does that aggregates my codependency
The power of walking away directly ties in to the power of longing for what she'd once had. Women are very emotional beings, and for her to come to the realization that she no longer has what she'd come to believe had always been hers can produce a cascade of emotional distress.
The woman should be more emotionally attached than the man. Let the woman be emotional. Once a man views there woman as his world and she knows that, it's game over. That only happens to men who don't have there purpose in order. And you should be walking away for yourself as a man and reclaiming your dignity.
FALSE.....They only want to earn your trust so it'll be easier for them to cut your throat later. Rule #1: If speaking to a woman understand she is lying about EVERYTHING.
Great video! My five year relationship came to an end a month ago. The love of my life chose to leave, and I can't stop thinking about him; I love him so deeply. I've done everything I can to win him back, but nothing seems to work. I'm feeling frustrated and can't imagine my life with anyone else. Despite my efforts to move on, I just can't shake the thoughts of him. I don’t know why I’m sharing this, but I really miss him.
It's tough to let go of someone you care about. I can relate, my 12year relationship also ended, and I struggled to move on. I tried everything to get him back, even seeking help from a spiritual counselor who ultimately helped me reconnect with him.
Apollonia is a brilliant psychologist.She is so logical,an extremely high I.Q.,a terrific advisor. I agree with every single thing she says. My regards from Venezuela.
Interesting video content, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back
@mattcole-zd7nh Man, I've been in your shoes before (like most other people). My last serious relationship ended after 2 years (she decided to end things) and I was devastated. Just like you, I wanted my ex back, I didn't want anyone else, I tried to get my ex back (this only pushed her away even more), and I was a complete wreck (not saying you are). I felt like that for months until I actively took an effort in focusing on other aspects of my life and accepting the fact that my ex walked away from me and our relationship. And now, almost 2 years later, I've recently connected with someone and things are looking positive. Your relationship recently ended, it's a fresh wound, so of course you won't be able to envision a life without her/ with anyone else. What you need to do is process your thoughts and emotions regarding her and the breakup, and while doing that, you need to keep yourself busy with work/school, hobbies, hitting the gym/ doing a sport, hanging out with friends and going on adventures (whatever you would define this as). Basically, live your life to the fullest. Yes, you will miss her deeply. Yes you will want her back. Yes the world will seem dark, dull, and lonely. Yes it will feel like you'll never find someone else/ be interested in anyone else. But, do remember this, time heals all wounds. Give yourself time, and be patient with yourself, to process everything about her and the situation/breakup and you will be fine in the long run. Healing isn't a linear process either, some days you will feel like you've got a grip on things, and then the next day you'll come crashing down, and that's okay as long as you keep pushing forward. And then one day you will look back, months/years would have passed, and you will understand why this happened and you will smile to yourself because you were strong enough to be able to get over the situation. Not to give you false hope, but this may happen. If you are still connected with your ex on social media like Instagram/Facebook, she will most likely be watching your stories/updates/posts. Don't post depressive stuff, only post positive things like you going to the gym, adventuring, hanging out with friends, because your ex may be watching those updates. And if she sees you're doing fine without her, that might pique her interest. However, this is a double edged sword. Remember this once critical piece of information, SHE LEFT YOU! And you need to ask yourself this important question: Do you want to be with someone who left you, because what is stopping them from leaving again in the future? Moral of my long paragraph is this: Keep your head up man, be patient with yourself on your healing journey (whatever this entails for you), you will be perfectly fine. Give yourself time.
one thing I really respect about Apollonia is that she apparently does her research and mixes it with a blend of Common Sense and experience . she is well worth listening to and contemplating what she says .
Point is.. who cares if they come back. But this is a good video because self reflection is very important and the examples she has explained are all situations that we all need to work on. We all should be focusing on ourselves anyway you cannot make anyone happy if you aren’t happy yourself.
If you do let her back in - make sure it’s not on her terms. Make her aware that she has to earn her place again with you, she can’t just hit you up and then everything is back to normal again. That then says to her that if she wants to get you back at the click of her fingers, she can.
Wow. Thank you for this confirmation. I’m actually going through this right now with my 7 year relationship. Last night I told my audience also to demand your respect because you have self value. You’re a legend 💪🏽
Wow this is timely. A woman whom I chatted with every day for 2 weeks went cold on me for 3 months. She then got back in touch dismissing the time lapse. I resisted replying straight away. however I intend to send a nonchalant reply out of courtesy after a wait. Tricky to do as she's captivating. You've helped me to keep my resolve. Thank you.
Thank you so much for sharing this amazing advice! I received a weird text from the woman I thought loved me deeply. Only to realize that it was another man involved in her life. I want to be honest, I was hurt and deceived. I was really & still deeply in love with this individual! Nevertheless, I made the conscious decision to walk away, I’m not sure how I feel at this moment but I do know in time I will be okay. It’s been 12 days 😢. Listening to your content really helps me everyday. It’s very much appreciated. At the end of the day, I just know I deserve a little bit more respect! I truly thought I was enough for this individual! She led me to believe I was worthy. I’m truly grateful for an opportunity to make myself better! Thank you 💜
If you feel the need to walk away, the behaviors you are on the receiving end of that demand this kind of action will not likely disappear. The best you can hope for is to potentially gain some respect if you've been disrespected or negelected. Unfortunately though the issues that created the situation aren't just going to evaporate.
EDIT: i now have not one but 3 girls i’m dating, all hotter than my ex. literal 10’s. Models. i just experienced this situation. my girl was obsessed with me for 3.5 years. the last 6 months she was distant and her flirting on social media caused me to walk away and leave. we had such a deep connection that she kept coming back. i did not come back it was her every time. also because i’m very masculine and its attractive behavior. long story short i wasted 5 months of my life waiting for her to take me seriously and stop with the shady behavior. it just continued, she hid it better, but projected onto me and wanted to see my phone. when you walk away you have to know that you will level up, you won’t have to deal with the negative emotions and her making you feel unworthy (if you are in love with that woman she can easily make you feel unworthy), and it’s NEVER too late to get a hot younger girlfriend. guys are in their 50’s pulling 25 year olds and having babies.
thank you so much for this video. the girl i have been dating for 3 months has pushed one of my boundaries, and while i was afraid to stand up for myself at risk of seeming controlling. i'm glad i stood up for and respected myself by creating some distance doing so has earned me respect and attention back.
This is exactly what I’m doing now , it’s hard at times but I know this is what I need to do. Thanks for the advice and I’m just going to keep improving and will see what happens.
Why on earth would a man want such a conditional, disrespectful human being to come back? I have actual advice for men and here it is. Decide on whether or not you are fine with a person that you have to perform for. It is quite an effort for such diminished return. If she only wants you when you are no longer available, it sounds like she is only in it to own you. What is the value of a woman such as that?The best way to keep a woman is to focus on yourself and your own betterment. When your girl loses respect for you, remember why it happened. Was it something you did or was it a rough patch that was out of your hands that led to the lack of respect. Your woman will only miss you when you are gone and the moment you go back to cohabitation, you surrender the edge. The very nature of committed relationships contribute to the decay of them. think about this; the best part is the courtship and the dating period. Once married or cohabiting, you no longer get the very best of that person, you get the lax version. If you are interested in duty, then marriage is for you. If you are interested in continuing to be an enigma to her, date and remain detached. Neither will stop the inevitability of her growing tired of you, but one buys more time than the other. I can understand how my opinion might not be to the liking of some, but it has shown to be demonstratively true. Interesting topic and conversation
Make sure she knows from.day one that you will.walk if she crosses your boundaries. If she steps out side of those boundaries, bounce her out. Not necessarily permanently. Just enough to know that you won't put up with bad behaviour. Love is just a small part of a relationship. Respect is everything.
When my ex and I broke up last year especially on the last night we spoke, I walked away because I wasn't going to be needy or anything that shows that she was making the right choice. Been broken up for 10 months and been in no contact for 8 months, I feel better and alot happier.
@@dillo5881 nope and I doubt that she will, so I'm just going to move on like I've been doing. I'm not going to worry or stress over it, I have too many things that's going on that she is the least of my problems
Video is right on time. In a relationship with a damaged emotionally unavailable person and I have to walk away. Sucks but I respect myself too much to be played with and taken for granted. Just want her to be okay bc she is an amazing woman, just needs healing.
Apollonia, I did exactly what your describing by accident! It was a honeymoon bliss the first 6 weeks we were dating then it went south for some reason. We only had 1 day of together fun the last 5 weekends. She had time for all her other friends except me. I started distancing myself, ignoring her texts, going out with other friends. She called Yesterday, wanted to know if I was mad and what was between us.( after blowing me off for 5 weekends). She then asked me out on 2 dates. I think I'm going to cancel the 2nd weekend date and tell her I wont be back in time to meet up with her. Ill be out with other friends. I love your delivery and messaging. Simple and concise, I love you!
I stood my grounds when i was disrespected, then i was ghosted. Eventually we started back talking not as before but i still stood my grounds so she knows where i stand...respect should be reciprocated. Time will tell.
@@ringomaharaj1268 interesting. Maybe she got what she wanted? I am in a similar situation. I just told her I’m not interested in dating. We hooked up but never went all the way
Im going through this now. I walked away after constantly accusing me of cheating when i wasnt now she’s blowing my phone up calling me 20 times in a row. I haven’t answered not 1 call or text yet. I demand respect
@@ApolloniaPonti i did once in the beginning but now my own mom & kids cant call me without her jumping down my throat about my phone. I can’t even talk to a woman that’s a cashier/waitress without her saying im cheating 🤦🏾♂️
You should not walk away from her. She loves u so much she calls you 20 times and u let her suffer? She accuses you because she loves you and is afraid u will do it again. Hold her instead and tell her you love her. At least urs calls you. I'm the one calling mine 20 times. No answer
i was exactly this person you suggested needy, always tracking her whereabouts, suffocating her. But... it was warranted as she was gas lighting, playing mind games, sending innuendo pics in a chat and then saying she was kidding. In the end after she grew tired of my questions she disregarded me, but not before backpeddaling, in which then i grew tired woke up and walked away, out of self respect no longer dealing with her insults, temper, and declining my calls. Later i discovered through self examination she was a covert Narcissist, and this was my first experience. It's been 30 days of NO CONTACT and i have healed and grown stronger from it. I also realized i was making mistakes too and grew from this experience
Thank you for the advice, and I left my girl cause she was disrespectful. Cause she wanted us to move in, and when I didn't help her move in cause my mother got sick. She told me her daughter knew I wasn't going to amount to shit. And I couldn't believe what came out of her mouth after all the great things I did for her. But when your mother has cancer, you are not thinking of moving in with a woman at the time. But I was respectful and told her to find a place and that I would be back and forth and help her. But as my mom got sick and ended up in the hospital. She found a place for her and her son and never told nothing but got mad at me. So I said to myself this woman wanted to do things alone, so I left her and walked away. And I said this woman didn't even ask me how my sick mother is doing. After ten years together and I said if she didn't even care about her mother or visit her often. How do I even believe she loves me or cares about my mother's health? And I just said to myself it's time to walk away and leave her for good. Not did I do the right thing, ladies and gentlemen. Let me know what you guys think, and thank y'all for reading it..
If you are in deep, real love things can be quite different or extremely tough to decide to counteract her occasional disrespect . Imagine to walk away from someone you deeply love!
yes it hurts but the reason it must be done is because you are seeing the person for who they really are in those moments and their mask is slipping. So you may deeply love them but the bigger you make the picture you will see that they aren't who you thought they were in your mind.
This is where I'm at right now. I have back off a few times when she just ignores me. It works quite well. I have an 'anxious-avoidant attachment style'. If I fear someone is leaving me I become very anxious. It's awful. I haven't been this close to anybody for 6 years because of how I become. Next I'm going to see a LCSW to help me out with these issues. She hasn't put me down verbally but she does avoid me a lot. I've walked a way a few times but she's still there. Back in the beginning about 1.5 years, I walked away and she came back to me after 4 months. It's been rough. I'm slowly getting a handle on it. I like the way you clarify things. I have some hope. Thanks Apolliana.
I am a Pastor but I fall into this situation of my wife pulling away and disrespecting me. I didn't know why but after 4 years I just learned the problem was from me. ❤❤ I am going to take this advice. It makes 100 plus 5 sense.
I had to walk away from a woman for disrespecting me, taking me for granted and not appreciating me and she came back after nearly 6 months, so I gave her a second chance and sure enough she did it again and I've never acted needy or desperate. I've always played it by the book and she keeps treating me that way. There won't be a third chance, but I can't help but wonder if there is anything else I could have done to prevent this from happening.
If she walks away once and returns after long time you should not welcome her. If shit happens once, it will happen again. She took you for granted. Next time if she pulls away and returns just ignore her or play her like invite to a dinner and don't show up.
@@Radekk921 I was the one who walked away because of her disrespect, taking me for granted and not appreciating me. After nearly 6 months, she wanted to come back into my life and I gave her a second chance. She hasn't changed and it's probably even worse. She still doesn't respect me or appreciate me, so I've walked away again and she won't be getting a third chance.
@@Radekk921 Well, I was hoping my walking away would teach her a lesson and gain respect, and I intended to walk away for good, thinking she wouldn't try to come back, so lesson learned.
It is common for relationships to have push and pull from both the man and the woman, however when it becomes too much part of the relationship, then it usually means one or both of the individuals needs to walk away.....forever.
@@davidtaylor1164 good question, I would say it is certain conflicts in a relationship that are often dealt with by passive-aggressive behavior; often these reaactions are emotional and based on emotional baggage from prior raltioniships, though not always. Sometimes they can be due to selfishness of one or both persons or personality disorders.
This is something I am currently going through - I always here when you walk away the always come back - however i found it’s so much more important to take care of number 1.
The relationship is was in lasted about 10 years and according to your definition it was definitely toxic , but she was the one who was policing all my activities and not allowing me to see friends as well. Almost ever one of the things you said describe her actions. When we split up I was good for a while but about 2 or 3 months in to the break up I started seeing that I'd not always done the best by her either And felt remorseful of the situation. Now she drinks and goes out 6 days a week SHE'S 50 !!! we are still civil and I have am still moving stuff out of the house , but we haven't had zero contact , I suggest small things, Non-dates but she makes excuses and they never happen. She States she's unhappy with how things are now in her life. I'm Probobly lucky She's gone but I miss her or think that I do regardless of the toxicity.
Haha I can laugh, I had the same situation.. my ex is 58 and still thinks she got it. These women are very delusional.. and she got a tattoo and getting another one haha let them go so they can face their karma it’s coming for them.
Yeah.my wife just moved out.before when shed have her outbursts and cold shoulder treatment.i wished shed move.now im remorseful about how we used to be before all the dumbshit added up and i grew numb and grew apart.i was impatient listening to same stories that go nowhere.i was in a hurry to get in shower and relax after work.we had a great relationship when i worked 2nd and she worked 1st.id come home and everyone was asleep and i could get alot done.when she went to 3d.she became shitty.always testing me with fake ailments.dumb self pity stories.and shed flip out if i told her that i just got home and needed to use restroom.but i couldve been more patient.i was always rushing.since relaxing wasnt in the cards.id get right to work in garage.and id jnvite her.my way of unwinding after working all day with a kid who repeats the same thing over and over and expects a laugh.10hrs of that.wears me out.when i get home i need 2hrs of no talking damn near.she knew i was a loner when she met me.but she blames me for all her outbursts and the break up.she denies the emotional affair shr admitted to that she had st work.im feeling fractured.i know im better off.but im sad and non-productive.
I think you nail the roots of the problems pretty well.The thing is that, since the roots are in the past, the wrong behavior come from an irrational place and are hard to control or change
I walked away two months ago now haven't heard a word! It still hurts but I hope to heal soon.. If she comes back I'll be willing to try again and do it differently..
@@zevahcnull2835 I'm sorry but if it's meant to be it will be.. Just gain your respect by going no contact.. I did walk away as she wasn't ready and would flirt by handing her business cards out in my presence out at our favourite places.. It was difficult to let go I gave her the ultimatum on the 25th March but only the 14th did I eventually realise I need to stop.. There were a few sensual kisses dates two and 3 in December.. Which was a first for me.. So was exciting thought it would progress naturally from there.. But I was mistaken unfortunately.. But learnt many lessons out of this.. All the best to you it's possible we just need to show then assertive and musculine tendancys and it'll be easier.. But if you not use to it takes awhile to practice and get use to it..
Do NOT take her back. If she wanted you she would reach out. You lose every ounce of your respect you built by walking away just to take her back. These women have egos and they crave attention, and that's only way she would come back. You deserve better. Trust me
I'm in the walking away phase and even thought about taking her back if she comes back. But after reading your comment and thinking "no don't take her back, have some respect for yourself" I realized that's what I need to do also. Stay strong my guy. Let it be; this is something I need to do also!
@@DG38594I've been told that a few times.. But I haven't reached out and it's 3 months still no contact from her.. I know she saw someone after me but that ended as well.. I know as she did post pics of them together then deleted the pics.. But I'm moving still think of her a bit.. Less then say a month ago.. I'm seeing someone else but it's probably the way to as she lives in a neighboring town so it's a long drive for us to meet up.. But we've seen each other 3 times now.. I don't feel the same connect as with the other girl but the dates have gotten better.. She's away this weekend so probably meet next weekend.. But I'm taking it slow.. Not texting to much as that kills attraction..
Over 4 months of hard no contact. She had been wanting to break up for a while but I kept holding on. I wasn't exactly begging or pleading but I wasn't letting her go either. But eventually enough was enough and we broke up. Initially it was hard for me to cope with the pain but its gotten easier with time. I am focusing on myself and living the life I put on hold for her. Bit by bit I am letting her go.
Set boundaries from the beginning and be clear about what will happen if they break them. If they break them, walk away. I'm not going to waste my time training a stubborn mule.
He became a new person, I missed the guy I fell in love with. No communication and he just walked away. That gave me time to think & get back to my senses. I was the one doing most (if not all) in the relationship, I was the one to initiate everything. He was just a liability. Good thing he did the walking sooner than later 😅
Judge yourself first fairly before judging another human. If the guy you fell in love with has changed, are you sure that some (if not all) of your behavior caused the change? A human changed all on a sudden all because of him?
Its simple you don't have to prove your value & quality if your a decent guy walk away don't chase or look back they are the looser not you cheers all.
The biggest problem with dating is that men want to have fun first to relieve the pressure and get to know the other person with a clear mind, while women want to get to know you long enough before they are ready to have fun. As a result, many relationships fail because the man has already looked for another woman by the time the woman is ready or he loses interest after the first fun because he realizes that it doesn't fit well in that respect, whereupon the women are always very disappointed and surprised why the men try so hard and then run away anyway, because they just had no way of reducing the pressure and thinking about whether they are really interested in the person or just have too many hormones in their heads.
We are separated and the biggest thing keeping me away is the fact that, I know nothing is going to change! She’ll be the victim and I’ll never live down any of my mistakes. These kinds create self fulfilling prophecies by making you become the monster they needed you to be so it can confirm their victimhood. I just can’t do this anymore! Plus I’m tired of working myself to death so her and the kids can just play. I literally am disrespected and not heard whatsoever. I have lost my crap a few times too and expressed my frustrations several times, yet…. No change… just me being the bad guy
Agree with that strategy however it can be difficult for a man in his young 20s when the demographics are problematic for men; just look at the data for dating sites...way more men than women in that age category; I've made this point before about the importance of demographics in what navigation tools work best.
@@ApolloniaPonti Agree, I was just pointing out an example of the demographic issues. Men have fewer options compared to women in certain age groups and the opposite is the case in other age groups. Again, how to navigate a situation depends on your options and demographics are a big part of it,....Thank you for you for your insights Mrs. Ponti, they are good and helpful. Great channel and resource.
@@ApolloniaPonti Yes, however goal oriented men are often working 50-60 hours a week, and dating someone at work has become sometimes unacceptable, frowned upon, and in many cases forbidden altogether. So there is not much time for meeting women organically, and yes, perhaps at the gym or some activity like that, however women there are often wanting to meet John Travolta; maybe men are underutilizing internet dating.
Her ex is back in the picture, even though I feel like I did everything right (set up fun dates, had a great time, didn’t chase but did pursue, only talked to her every few days to keep my distance, etc.) she always seemed super into me, but was very inconsistent in communication. I would briefly randomly see her and her attraction would spike and she would start texting me a lot and set up a date. She then canceled our last date and I found out she was hanging out with her abusive ex from 6 months ago. Sucks 😞
@@calebhodson7421 true! I walked away. Weirdly enough, she randomly commented on my snap story today, and we had a very brief convo. Hadn’t talked to her in 2.5 weeks. Left her on read bc I wanna see if she’ll show more of her cards/interest or if she’s just being friendly
@@davidaustin8424 She's dating other people and unsure, so she will try to keep you around "just in case" best to find someone who loves you consistently and often.
I walked away , told her I wanted to date other people (which I didn't want to, but just said it), she didn't have time for me, she was so busy being in everything. I had to be on her calendar (like scheduling a dentist, or doctor, or car work). Got tired of it, so I left her. When I told her I wanted to see other people, she just said: "ok", like it didn't bother her at all. It's been over a month, and all I think about is, did I make a mistake. We have broken up several times in the past 2 years before. I also think she is a Narcissist. She is a demanding person, stubern, hard headed......
If you feel you had a valid reason you did. Don’t be a girl and change your mind once you did something. If she comes back she’ll be much better. Single life is tough but the greatest when you are comfortable with it
Don’t reconnect, disconnect instead. Don’t chase, replace - you will thank me forever
Wife back door not allowed ect
Thnks buddy for the advice
@@abdimajidahmed1516 XXX not allowed
@@abdimajidahmed1516 only husband wife rules
@@abdimajidahmed1516 don't die as a disbeliever
Dont waste your time trying to make a woman re-respect you. Save your energy to create a stronger frame with a new person and learn from your past mistakes.
It’s hard
@@wBrewsterboyjr92 stay strong. I know how hard it is . Its the best thing that ever happened to me . She left me after being the kindest most loving husband. Dropped 100 pounds became much more attractive physically, mentally. And i am with much better women. In fact she is trying to get me back now. You become a real man only through discomfort and pain. Once you have tons of options the tides turn . Hang in there my friend
Well said 👏 👌 👍
100% 👍
@@AhmedTarek-s9mthats a dangerous statement though because it tells people “ the other person is always in the wrong” & imo its a little narcissistic of you to think one person ruined the relationship when its 50/50. I don’t know you, but I can 100% guaranteed you that you were not as innocent & perfect as you think you wwre & hopefully you don’t bring that thought pattern Into your new relationship, or I can pretty much promise it will also not work out. Good luck man. Just saying it from experience.
This works 💯
a) if she comes back, its a win you now have her full attention as she will be in her best behavior
b) if she doesn't come back, its a win, you just lost a problem and a time waster in your life
I feel there is a 50/50 chance she will continue in her past behavior if you allow her back.
There is a 100% chance that you will no longer experience her bad behavior if you STAY away.
Did she apologize?
Is she returning because she's desperate?
Is she trying to improve herself with counseling, a 12 step program of even watching moral, ethical you tube videos about healthy relationship behavior and excitedly share with you her insights into her bad behavior AND apologize?
What do you mean by "she comes back" but this video talks about walking away and you say it works?
Thank you this comment me feel much better.
@@mikyl-fo8rhtaht is my case 😢
If she comes back you LOSE! NEVER EVER let her come back
Never feel guilty in walking away from toxic people
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What if you're the toxic one?
Leave the relationship.
Forget that woman.
Walk away fast and do not look back.
If I am walking away, it's simply for my mental health. I can't play all these mind games.
100% Just did this myself to a dude who probably thinks I'm not serious about it due to these stupid videos (ignore her most of the time, threaten to leave, walk away to get her back -- NO). Don't get with people who don't value you and make it very visibly clear they like you and want to get to know you, and make you part of their live by sharing their moments and aspirations. Man or woman, just walk. Nobody owns you; you aren't property. If you're in a relationship and you don't feel secure, talk to your partner--you're an adult, FFS, communicate!
@@blindscrubshots Agree completely how stupid these videos are. I think 1% of people try these techniques and that's the 1% with psycho tendancies. Or kids who are easily manipulated.
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@@blindscrubshotswife back door not allowed ect
If I wanna play games I got a PlayStation.
What I've learned is that it's hard for people to change. Even if you do get her to come back, she's just going to be her old self doing the same toxic behavior that caused you to walk away in the first place. You got to walk away and stay away from her. Your dignity and self-respect will be intact and you will gain confidence in yourself for doing something that most guys are not able to do.
The man, dropping gems, thanks
😂😂😂😂
I’ve learned this the hard way over the years
I can totally relate man, just went through this recently. She'll never change, what a waste of human flesh...
BARS 👍
I walked away and just kept walking. Very peaceful now!
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I walked away about 3 months ago. Was dating a Dismissive Avoidant woman and after she canceled on me 4 straight dates i made the decision to leave. Time boundaries are at the top for me and once my time wasn't being appreciated, I'll stop giving it. Told her I'd give her the space she needed and let her take care of her priorities. I do miss her at times but I'm happier now self improving and focusing on myself. I'm currently hitting the gym 6 days a week, getting in the best shape I've ever been. Level up guys💪
Apolonia spitting facts 💯 % 🔥
Apolonia spitting facts 💯 % 🔥
6 days a week is great
I want to be that way also, keeping busy for myself....
„avoidant“ = low interest
they taught us that one thing that makes a man a man is his willingness to walk away when boundaries are being crossed, especially repeatedly
Ive walked away countless times and every single woman has contacted me back
reasons causes you to walk away ?
and in your opinion what makes it sucess everytime ?
@@ahmadelshbasy3222 1. Their entitled & disrespectful behaviour. 2. I'm handsome & successful.
@@ahmadelshbasy3222his reasons are his own. But I presume that walking away is a powerful strategy due to respect that this action commands.
Besides, it appears to me that it's a rare occurence for some women to be given a cold shoulder. If a man walks away he immediately stands out from the crowd
What is the point? You walked away, you shouldn't go back.
When I walk away they always say good riddance.
When you walk away, say thank you for the time and don't look back. Don't be friends be gone.
Be gone
@@Simondawonde if I am not mistaken, you answered me. Go feed your cats.
@@jimmyd6111wife back door not allowed ect
@@Simondawondewife back door not allowed ect
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The one thing that i learned from all woman i've been with it's don't waste your Time trying re-respect you, go find another girl deserve you more & respect you & love you more
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35 and up you are used I don't want a woman that is used leave me alone
I have walked away to conserve my well being. She may respect me for it but I won't be going back to her. I'd rather teach her a lesson that when you find a good man, don't disrespect him. Better luck next time darling 🤞
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Once you have lost respect its over. I made the mistake of taking her back. Dont make the same mistake.
Thankyou man She came back to me after a month really wanting to remain friends after a yr relationship I told her no and lovingly wished her all the best.I don't regret it but am missing her but know deep down I wasn't prepared to be disrespected or waked over by her over controlling and bratish behaviour I chose peace but the loss hurts...
@@gra6799good 💩. Those residual situationdhips after the breakup are just them trying to have something while they’re looking for something new to move on. Just leave from the jump. Not to hurt them, but to assert your self respect.
@@seanfrance3182 Well said
When someone disrespect a person means that is the real personality, walk away for your dignity and peace of mind, never take back someone that disrespect you .
Great
Let me know the perfect relationship 😂
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me, I still love her and most times i cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, I love her so much, i don't know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her.
@jaypritchett3414 wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?
@jaypritchett3414 Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive.
Why worry over a spill milk when you own the factory.you own the entire universe nothing can stop the power of your mind and your abundance mindset cheers man
Bot comment
Same situation it’s horrible and so frustrating to be still so attached while she has moved on and I question why I am obsessing and can’t stop when I know she filed for divorce and has washed her hands of me. It’s a mindfuck can’t live like this have to somehow snap out of it and get confidence back and try and find happiness again. Daunting
Very good advice. More young men need to start doing this and not be afraid of losing the girl. This is the only way the world will heal. Right now men everywhere are weak and it has never been more apparent.
Lol this is the comment you gave a like to? Wow, speaks volumes about how you view men
And you think men are strong today? You GenZers haven’t even learned to play outside yet…at least millennials did some. Yes men are weak, grip strength, and testosterone is at it’s lowest in history and our generations have never seen a war like our fathers and grandfathers did. Men today need to have a backbone and quit being simpified.
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@@Joe-hf3cnwife back door not allowed ect
I've always felt that a breakup doesn't have to be confrontational. It just has to be over.
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Staying away is a 100% guarantee that you will no longer be manipulated by her bad behavior.
If you allow her back you have a 50/50 chance of her bad behavior returning.
If without prompting, she apologizes for her bad behavior you may have better odds.
If she is working on her bad behavior with a counselor or 12 step program and apologizes without prompting, you may want to give her one more chance.
Needy that was me.
Should have known better..
But I agree the power of walking away restores your self respect.
I've learnt from you. I've regained my dignity as a man as a result of your advice. Love from South Africa.
Kunjani mntase?
@@AkxlieTVMhe’s speaking in English, you should do the same . The girl is fine btw
Bathi khuluma silungu bafo 😅@@AkxlieTVM
You earn a respect in a relationship you don’t get it but earning it. If your partner don’t respect you just walk away.
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I make full damn sure ANY woman I interact with in a relationship mode sees me interacting with other women. The message is obvious - I have choices, I will be the one doing the choosing, YOU have no power over that, and if YOU want something more from a relationship, YOU level up, I am already where I need to be.
Always walk. Always, and keep it moving. The funny thing once you go no contact often that person will reach out but keep it moving.Don’t ask or for ask an explanation, no closure just walk away.
that is the most brutal form of walking away which will result in the highest likelyhood of the other person reaching back out and trying to come back. IMO. Because it is giving the least effort / most apathy.
this is wonderful advice for anyone who felt abandoned by parents at a young age and experiences strong feelings of fear and anxiety when they fall in love. if you've made a genuine connection with someone and they are pulling you in and pushing you back away repeatedly, then it's important to break this cycle, not only for the sake of getting her respect back, but also for your mental health. share your feelings with friends and loved ones to avoid making any desperate moves with her, and show her how well you can handle a difficult situation by being disciplined and stoic. previously i would let my feelings of abandonment take control, turning them inward and becoming a mess, or alternatively burning a bridge over my time not being valued and ending the relationship pre-emptively. what i was scared to do was maturely communicate my concerns, express a need for time to step back and re-evaluate the situation, and focus on my own well-being while keeping that door open for her. to heal from your past trauma, you have to act against instinct and let the good things that come from that reenforce a new pattern of behavior within yourself. you can change. you can heal.
U just described my whole life since childhood and all my relationships up until now it’s time for a change for me I’m done being so codependent and needy just lost the best girl I’ve ever had because of my codependent behavior and I know if she ever comes back I will be a different man not a bad guy but a stoic guy that’s unfazed by the things she does that aggregates my codependency
The power of walking away directly ties in to the power of longing for what she'd once had. Women are very emotional beings, and for her to come to the realization that she no longer has what she'd come to believe had always been hers can produce a cascade of emotional distress.
Yes, it can especially if the relationship was good for her and there is still love there.
yess
@Michael simp asss😂
@@TheFeezy777 😮
🤣
The woman should be more emotionally attached than the man. Let the woman be emotional. Once a man views there woman as his world and she knows that, it's game over. That only happens to men who don't have there purpose in order. And you should be walking away for yourself as a man and reclaiming your dignity.
It's the law of attraction, we don't want the easy win.
We want to work for the true love ❤
FALSE.....They only want to earn your trust so it'll be easier for them to cut your throat later. Rule #1: If speaking to a woman understand she is lying about EVERYTHING.
Speak for yourself.
If you have to work for her love you're her servant.
Agreed
@@mikyl-fo8rhwife back door not allowed ect
Wife back door not allowed ect
Great video! My five year relationship came to an end a month ago. The love of my life chose to leave, and I can't stop thinking about him; I love him so deeply. I've done everything I can to win him back, but nothing seems to work. I'm feeling frustrated and can't imagine my life with anyone else. Despite my efforts to move on, I just can't shake the thoughts of him. I don’t know why I’m sharing this, but I really miss him.
It's tough to let go of someone you care about. I can relate, my 12year relationship also ended, and I struggled to move on. I tried everything to get him back, even seeking help from a spiritual counselor who ultimately helped me reconnect with him.
That's incredible! How did you find a spiritual counselor, and how can I contact one?
His name is Owen Abiola, and he’s an amazing spiritual counselor who specializes in bringing back lost loves.
Owen Abiola has incredible powers, and he can assist you.
Thank you for sharing this valuable information! I just looked him up online, and I'm impressed.
I didn't walk away just to turn around and walk back. I am walking and going to continue walking until I forget she ever existed.
Apollonia is a brilliant psychologist.She is so logical,an extremely high I.Q.,a terrific advisor. I agree with every single thing she says. My regards from Venezuela.
Thank you so much for the support!
Interesting video content, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
Her name is shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
@mattcole-zd7nh Man, I've been in your shoes before (like most other people). My last serious relationship ended after 2 years (she decided to end things) and I was devastated. Just like you, I wanted my ex back, I didn't want anyone else, I tried to get my ex back (this only pushed her away even more), and I was a complete wreck (not saying you are). I felt like that for months until I actively took an effort in focusing on other aspects of my life and accepting the fact that my ex walked away from me and our relationship. And now, almost 2 years later, I've recently connected with someone and things are looking positive.
Your relationship recently ended, it's a fresh wound, so of course you won't be able to envision a life without her/ with anyone else. What you need to do is process your thoughts and emotions regarding her and the breakup, and while doing that, you need to keep yourself busy with work/school, hobbies, hitting the gym/ doing a sport, hanging out with friends and going on adventures (whatever you would define this as). Basically, live your life to the fullest.
Yes, you will miss her deeply.
Yes you will want her back.
Yes the world will seem dark, dull, and lonely.
Yes it will feel like you'll never find someone else/ be interested in anyone else.
But, do remember this, time heals all wounds. Give yourself time, and be patient with yourself, to process everything about her and the situation/breakup and you will be fine in the long run. Healing isn't a linear process either, some days you will feel like you've got a grip on things, and then the next day you'll come crashing down, and that's okay as long as you keep pushing forward. And then one day you will look back, months/years would have passed, and you will understand why this happened and you will smile to yourself because you were strong enough to be able to get over the situation.
Not to give you false hope, but this may happen. If you are still connected with your ex on social media like Instagram/Facebook, she will most likely be watching your stories/updates/posts. Don't post depressive stuff, only post positive things like you going to the gym, adventuring, hanging out with friends, because your ex may be watching those updates. And if she sees you're doing fine without her, that might pique her interest. However, this is a double edged sword. Remember this once critical piece of information, SHE LEFT YOU! And you need to ask yourself this important question: Do you want to be with someone who left you, because what is stopping them from leaving again in the future?
Moral of my long paragraph is this: Keep your head up man, be patient with yourself on your healing journey (whatever this entails for you), you will be perfectly fine. Give yourself time.
one thing I really respect about Apollonia is that she apparently does her research and mixes it with a blend of Common Sense and experience . she is well worth listening to and contemplating what she says .
Point is.. who cares if they come back. But this is a good video because self reflection is very important and the examples she has explained are all situations that we all need to work on. We all should be focusing on ourselves anyway you cannot make anyone happy if you aren’t happy yourself.
If you do let her back in - make sure it’s not on her terms. Make her aware that she has to earn her place again with you, she can’t just hit you up and then everything is back to normal again. That then says to her that if she wants to get you back at the click of her fingers, she can.
this video really called me out, im so glad that I've changed my anxious ways
If she already didn't respect you before, she's just going to be doing the same BS when she comes back. Don't waste your energy on people like that
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❤❤
Wow. Thank you for this confirmation. I’m actually going through this right now with my 7 year relationship. Last night I told my audience also to demand your respect because you have self value. You’re a legend 💪🏽
Wow this is timely. A woman whom I chatted with every day for 2 weeks went cold on me for 3 months. She then got back in touch dismissing the time lapse. I resisted replying straight away. however I intend to send a nonchalant reply out of courtesy after a wait. Tricky to do as she's captivating. You've helped me to keep my resolve. Thank you.
So how'd it go?
@@adamclark9004 She and I no longer take an interest in each other and have moved on
@@adamclark9004 yeah
Thank you so much for sharing this amazing advice! I received a weird text from the woman I thought loved me deeply. Only to realize that it was another man involved in her life. I want to be honest, I was hurt and deceived. I was really & still deeply in love with this individual! Nevertheless, I made the conscious decision to walk away, I’m not sure how I feel at this moment but I do know in time I will be okay. It’s been 12 days 😢. Listening to your content really helps me everyday. It’s very much appreciated.
At the end of the day, I just know I deserve a little bit more respect!
I truly thought I was enough for this individual! She led me to believe I was worthy.
I’m truly grateful for an opportunity to make myself better!
Thank you 💜
If you feel the need to walk away, the behaviors you are on the receiving end of that demand this kind of action will not likely disappear. The best you can hope for is to potentially gain some respect if you've been disrespected or negelected. Unfortunately though the issues that created the situation aren't just going to evaporate.
EDIT: i now have not one but 3 girls i’m dating, all hotter than my ex. literal 10’s. Models.
i just experienced this situation. my girl was obsessed with me for 3.5 years. the last 6 months she was distant and her flirting on social media caused me to walk away and leave. we had such a deep connection that she kept coming back. i did not come back it was her every time. also because i’m very masculine and its attractive behavior.
long story short i wasted 5 months of my life waiting for her to take me seriously and stop with the shady behavior. it just continued, she hid it better, but projected onto me and wanted to see my phone.
when you walk away you have to know that you will level up, you won’t have to deal with the negative emotions and her making you feel unworthy (if you are in love with that woman she can easily make you feel unworthy), and it’s NEVER too late to get a hot younger girlfriend. guys are in their 50’s pulling 25 year olds and having babies.
Good to hear bro
thank you so much for this video. the girl i have been dating for 3 months has pushed one of my boundaries, and while i was afraid to stand up for myself at risk of seeming controlling. i'm glad i stood up for and respected myself by creating some distance doing so has earned me respect and attention back.
You got this!
You just hit the nail on the head and help many of us out here from relationship directions.apreciate your good work.
This is a fantastic post, confirm that I made the right decision after catching her on a dating app.
Thank you so much!
So, ask for a break, go no contact, and see if she reaches out, and if not, oh well.
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This is exactly what I’m doing now , it’s hard at times but I know this is what I need to do. Thanks for the advice and I’m just going to keep improving and will see what happens.
Power to you bro, same situation. Memories hit back and we fel weak but bro, build a strong frame
@@surajpaul2368 yeah to be honest it’s one of the toughest things I have done learn how to let go , and fight the urge to reach out .
@@4507jrodman bro it’s so hard because I want to be there for her. My heart is broken
Why on earth would a man want such a conditional, disrespectful human being to come back? I have actual advice for men and here it is. Decide on whether or not you are fine with a person that you have to perform for. It is quite an effort for such diminished return. If she only wants you when you are no longer available, it sounds like she is only in it to own you. What is the value of a woman such as that?The best way to keep a woman is to focus on yourself and your own betterment. When your girl loses respect for you, remember why it happened. Was it something you did or was it a rough patch that was out of your hands that led to the lack of respect. Your woman will only miss you when you are gone and the moment you go back to cohabitation, you surrender the edge. The very nature of committed relationships contribute to the decay of them. think about this; the best part is the courtship and the dating period. Once married or cohabiting, you no longer get the very best of that person, you get the lax version. If you are interested in duty, then marriage is for you. If you are interested in continuing to be an enigma to her, date and remain detached. Neither will stop the inevitability of her growing tired of you, but one buys more time than the other. I can understand how my opinion might not be to the liking of some, but it has shown to be demonstratively true. Interesting topic and conversation
Walk away and walk past them everytime they're not worth it.
Make sure she knows from.day one that you will.walk if she crosses your boundaries. If she steps out side of those boundaries, bounce her out. Not necessarily permanently. Just enough to know that you won't put up with bad behaviour. Love is just a small part of a relationship. Respect is everything.
You really nailed my issues with attachment in this video. Thanks for helping me understand myself better.
Glad it was helpful!
Yeah I think she just described me here also. I'd be interested in an in-depth video on it.
@@ApolloniaPonti loe you❤
You should recieve an award, you are an amazing professional!
When my ex and I broke up last year especially on the last night we spoke, I walked away because I wasn't going to be needy or anything that shows that she was making the right choice. Been broken up for 10 months and been in no contact for 8 months, I feel better and alot happier.
She ever contact you back??
@@dillo5881 nope and I doubt that she will, so I'm just going to move on like I've been doing. I'm not going to worry or stress over it, I have too many things that's going on that she is the least of my problems
Don't stop, keep walking, don't even have a look back, she does not deserve your value
The thing I am most proud of is going no contact 15 years and counting
Video is right on time. In a relationship with a damaged emotionally unavailable person and I have to walk away. Sucks but I respect myself too much to be played with and taken for granted. Just want her to be okay bc she is an amazing woman, just needs healing.
Apollonia, I did exactly what your describing by accident! It was a honeymoon bliss the first 6 weeks we were dating then it went south for some reason. We only had 1 day of together fun the last 5 weekends. She had time for all her other friends except me. I started distancing myself, ignoring her texts, going out with other friends. She called Yesterday, wanted to know if I was mad and what was between us.( after blowing me off for 5 weekends). She then asked me out on 2 dates. I think I'm going to cancel the 2nd weekend date and tell her I wont be back in time to meet up with her. Ill be out with other friends. I love your delivery and messaging. Simple and concise, I love you!
I stood my grounds when i was disrespected, then i was ghosted. Eventually we started back talking not as before but i still stood my grounds so she knows where i stand...respect should be reciprocated. Time will tell.
And?
We eventually slept together but things changed drastically after...I reached out but now we don't communicate anymore 😮
@@ringomaharaj1268 interesting. Maybe she got what she wanted? I am in a similar situation. I just told her I’m not interested in dating. We hooked up but never went all the way
Im going through this now. I walked away after constantly accusing me of cheating when i wasnt now she’s blowing my phone up calling me 20 times in a row. I haven’t answered not 1 call or text yet. I demand respect
She sounds like she may have some insecurities from another relationship if you haven't given her a reason to assume this in yours.
@@ApolloniaPonti i did once in the beginning but now my own mom & kids cant call me without her jumping down my throat about my phone. I can’t even talk to a woman that’s a cashier/waitress without her saying im cheating 🤦🏾♂️
@@dap3451 and you wonder why she was suspicious.
You should not walk away from her. She loves u so much she calls you 20 times and u let her suffer? She accuses you because she loves you and is afraid u will do it again. Hold her instead and tell her you love her. At least urs calls you. I'm the one calling mine 20 times. No answer
You know sometimes inconsistency and impulsive makes one to be insecure in a relationship
Thank you for this, please share more of this content. Would love to hear more about when and how to reconnect
i was exactly this person you suggested needy, always tracking her whereabouts, suffocating her. But... it was warranted as she was gas lighting, playing mind games, sending innuendo pics in a chat and then saying she was kidding. In the end after she grew tired of my questions she disregarded me, but not before backpeddaling, in which then i grew tired woke up and walked away, out of self respect no longer dealing with her insults, temper, and declining my calls. Later i discovered through self examination she was a covert Narcissist, and this was my first experience. It's been 30 days of NO CONTACT and i have healed and grown stronger from it. I also realized i was making mistakes too and grew from this experience
I don’t understand why people say don’t take her back. Not every relationship is the same
Thank you for the advice, and I left my girl cause she was disrespectful. Cause she wanted us to move in, and when I didn't help her move in cause my mother got sick. She told me her daughter knew I wasn't going to amount to shit. And I couldn't believe what came out of her mouth after all the great things I did for her. But when your mother has cancer, you are not thinking of moving in with a woman at the time. But I was respectful and told her to find a place and that I would be back and forth and help her. But as my mom got sick and ended up in the hospital. She found a place for her and her son and never told nothing but got mad at me. So I said to myself this woman wanted to do things alone, so I left her and walked away. And I said this woman didn't even ask me how my sick mother is doing. After ten years together and I said if she didn't even care about her mother or visit her often. How do I even believe she loves me or cares about my mother's health? And I just said to myself it's time to walk away and leave her for good. Not did I do the right thing, ladies and gentlemen. Let me know what you guys think, and thank y'all for reading it..
If you are in deep, real love things can be quite different or extremely tough to decide to counteract her occasional disrespect . Imagine to walk away from someone you deeply love!
yes it hurts but the reason it must be done is because you are seeing the person for who they really are in those moments and their mask is slipping. So you may deeply love them but the bigger you make the picture you will see that they aren't who you thought they were in your mind.
You helped me a lot with my anxiety thank you so much
And that is why I subscribed to your channel. Thank you for the video.
I appreciate that! 😊
This is where I'm at right now. I have back off a few times when she just ignores me. It works quite well. I have an 'anxious-avoidant attachment style'. If I fear someone is leaving me I become very anxious. It's awful. I haven't been this close to anybody for 6 years because of how I become.
Next I'm going to see a LCSW to help me out with these issues. She hasn't put me down verbally but she does avoid me a lot. I've walked a way a few times but she's still there.
Back in the beginning about 1.5 years, I walked away and she came back to me after 4 months. It's been rough. I'm slowly getting a handle on it. I like the way you clarify things. I have some hope. Thanks Apolliana.
I am a Pastor but I fall into this situation of my wife pulling away and disrespecting me. I didn't know why but after 4 years I just learned the problem was from me. ❤❤ I am going to take this advice. It makes 100 plus 5 sense.
Wow! Non religious talk!
Thanks dude
Definitely talk about it gently and walk away. You don't need that from your closest partner 🙅🏾♂️
I had to walk away from a woman for disrespecting me, taking me for granted and not appreciating me and she came back after nearly 6 months, so I gave her a second chance and sure enough she did it again and I've never acted needy or desperate. I've always played it by the book and she keeps treating me that way. There won't be a third chance, but I can't help but wonder if there is anything else I could have done to prevent this from happening.
If she walks away once and returns after long time you should not welcome her. If shit happens once, it will happen again. She took you for granted. Next time if she pulls away and returns just ignore her or play her like invite to a dinner and don't show up.
@@Radekk921 I was the one who walked away because of her disrespect, taking me for granted and not appreciating me. After nearly 6 months, she wanted to come back into my life and I gave her a second chance. She hasn't changed and it's probably even worse. She still doesn't respect me or appreciate me, so I've walked away again and she won't be getting a third chance.
@@Jediknight4jc Good job. Don't even give a second chance. Life is too short to put your effort into people who already failed.
@@Radekk921 Well, I was hoping my walking away would teach her a lesson and gain respect, and I intended to walk away for good, thinking she wouldn't try to come back, so lesson learned.
yeah did all you could, its her loss
Thank you LORD JESUS CHRIST AMEN 🙏🏽 🙌🏽 ❤️ I needed this thank you 🙏🏽
It is common for relationships to have push and pull from both the man and the woman, however when it becomes too much part of the relationship, then it usually means one or both of the individuals needs to walk away.....forever.
What is push and pull?
@@davidtaylor1164 good question, I would say it is certain conflicts in a relationship that are often dealt with by passive-aggressive behavior; often these reaactions are emotional and based on emotional baggage from prior raltioniships, though not always. Sometimes they can be due to selfishness of one or both persons or personality disorders.
This is something I am currently going through - I always here when you walk away the always come back - however i found it’s so much more important to take care of number 1.
I do thank you for this timely message
Apollonia, you are soooo inteligent! I have't heard such a deep explanation of "power of walking away", so far
The relationship is was in lasted about 10 years and according to your definition it was definitely toxic , but she was the one who was policing all my activities and not allowing me to see friends as well.
Almost ever one of the things you said describe her actions. When we split up I was good for a while but about 2 or 3 months in to the break up I started seeing that I'd not always done the best by her either
And felt remorseful of the situation.
Now she drinks and goes out 6 days a week SHE'S 50 !!! we are still civil and I have am still moving stuff out of the house , but we haven't had zero contact , I suggest small things,
Non-dates but she makes excuses and they never happen. She States she's unhappy with how things are now in her life. I'm Probobly lucky
She's gone but I miss her or think that I do regardless of the toxicity.
Haha I can laugh, I had the same situation.. my ex is 58 and still thinks she got it. These women are very delusional.. and she got a tattoo and getting another one haha let them go so they can face their karma it’s coming for them.
Yeah.my wife just moved out.before when shed have her outbursts and cold shoulder treatment.i wished shed move.now im remorseful about how we used to be before all the dumbshit added up and i grew numb and grew apart.i was impatient listening to same stories that go nowhere.i was in a hurry to get in shower and relax after work.we had a great relationship when i worked 2nd and she worked 1st.id come home and everyone was asleep and i could get alot done.when she went to 3d.she became shitty.always testing me with fake ailments.dumb self pity stories.and shed flip out if i told her that i just got home and needed to use restroom.but i couldve been more patient.i was always rushing.since relaxing wasnt in the cards.id get right to work in garage.and id jnvite her.my way of unwinding after working all day with a kid who repeats the same thing over and over and expects a laugh.10hrs of that.wears me out.when i get home i need 2hrs of no talking damn near.she knew i was a loner when she met me.but she blames me for all her outbursts and the break up.she denies the emotional affair shr admitted to that she had st work.im feeling fractured.i know im better off.but im sad and non-productive.
I think you nail the roots of the problems pretty well.The thing is that, since the roots are in the past, the wrong behavior come from an irrational place and are hard to control or change
When I walk away I don’t want em back
Walking away doesn’t always require them coming back and If they don’t it should make it easier
I walked away two months ago now haven't heard a word! It still hurts but I hope to heal soon.. If she comes back I'll be willing to try again and do it differently..
Same here brother, my relationship ended April 2nd. We’ve been no contact ever since
@@zevahcnull2835 I'm sorry but if it's meant to be it will be.. Just gain your respect by going no contact.. I did walk away as she wasn't ready and would flirt by handing her business cards out in my presence out at our favourite places.. It was difficult to let go I gave her the ultimatum on the 25th March but only the 14th did I eventually realise I need to stop.. There were a few sensual kisses dates two and 3 in December.. Which was a first for me.. So was exciting thought it would progress naturally from there.. But I was mistaken unfortunately.. But learnt many lessons out of this.. All the best to you it's possible we just need to show then assertive and musculine tendancys and it'll be easier.. But if you not use to it takes awhile to practice and get use to it..
Do NOT take her back. If she wanted you she would reach out. You lose every ounce of your respect you built by walking away just to take her back. These women have egos and they crave attention, and that's only way she would come back. You deserve better. Trust me
I'm in the walking away phase and even thought about taking her back if she comes back. But after reading your comment and thinking "no don't take her back, have some respect for yourself" I realized that's what I need to do also. Stay strong my guy. Let it be; this is something I need to do also!
@@DG38594I've been told that a few times.. But I haven't reached out and it's 3 months still no contact from her.. I know she saw someone after me but that ended as well.. I know as she did post pics of them together then deleted the pics.. But I'm moving still think of her a bit.. Less then say a month ago.. I'm seeing someone else but it's probably the way to as she lives in a neighboring town so it's a long drive for us to meet up.. But we've seen each other 3 times now.. I don't feel the same connect as with the other girl but the dates have gotten better.. She's away this weekend so probably meet next weekend.. But I'm taking it slow.. Not texting to much as that kills attraction..
You have helped me out so much and pulled me out of a black hole
Over 4 months of hard no contact. She had been wanting to break up for a while but I kept holding on. I wasn't exactly begging or pleading but I wasn't letting her go either. But eventually enough was enough and we broke up. Initially it was hard for me to cope with the pain but its gotten easier with time. I am focusing on myself and living the life I put on hold for her. Bit by bit I am letting her go.
Keep pushing man 💪🏾
How long were you together?
@@matthewschwartz6607 11 years
@@JerkVegas86 a little bit everyday
😂😂😂😂
Set boundaries from the beginning and be clear about what will happen if they break them. If they break them, walk away. I'm not going to waste my time training a stubborn mule.
He became a new person, I missed the guy I fell in love with. No communication and he just walked away. That gave me time to think & get back to my senses. I was the one doing most (if not all) in the relationship, I was the one to initiate everything. He was just a liability. Good thing he did the walking sooner than later 😅
Judge yourself first fairly before judging another human. If the guy you fell in love with has changed, are you sure that some (if not all) of your behavior caused the change? A human changed all on a sudden all because of him?
Need a nap
My relationship of 3years ended yesterday and i spent a lot to see us happy
just level up mentally physically n financially then they all come back
Literally the 1% Who’s reading this, God bless you, stay safe and have a wonderful day.
Thank you! Blessings your way too!
Thank you, same!
Its simple you don't have to prove your value & quality if your a decent guy walk away don't chase or look back they are the looser not you cheers all.
The biggest problem with dating is that men want to have fun first to relieve the pressure and get to know the other person with a clear mind, while women want to get to know you long enough before they are ready to have fun. As a result, many relationships fail because the man has already looked for another woman by the time the woman is ready or he loses interest after the first fun because he realizes that it doesn't fit well in that respect, whereupon the women are always very disappointed and surprised why the men try so hard and then run away anyway, because they just had no way of reducing the pressure and thinking about whether they are really interested in the person or just have too many hormones in their heads.
Been looking for this comment!
I’m a man and in my experience it’s the opposite!
We are separated and the biggest thing keeping me away is the fact that, I know nothing is going to change! She’ll be the victim and I’ll never live down any of my mistakes. These kinds create self fulfilling prophecies by making you become the monster they needed you to be so it can confirm their victimhood. I just can’t do this anymore! Plus I’m tired of working myself to death so her and the kids can just play. I literally am disrespected and not heard whatsoever. I have lost my crap a few times too and expressed my frustrations several times, yet…. No change… just me being the bad guy
Words of wisdom 🙏🏻
Self-work is important for every situation that deals with being a productive individual in society. Relationships, jobs, etc.
Let them go and move on with your life, it’s hard but you will survive..
Men Sad ..Men Broken.. Men Crying 😢😢😢.......Men watched A.ponti .. Men relaxed 😌
Agree with that strategy however it can be difficult for a man in his young 20s when the demographics are problematic for men; just look at the data for dating sites...way more men than women in that age category; I've made this point before about the importance of demographics in what navigation tools work best.
Yes, but men and women shouldn't just focus on online dating. Meeting women organically, social events etc. Is just as important.
@@ApolloniaPonti Agree, I was just pointing out an example of the demographic issues. Men have fewer options compared to women in certain age groups and the opposite is the case in other age groups. Again, how to navigate a situation depends on your options and demographics are a big part of it,....Thank you for you for your insights Mrs. Ponti, they are good and helpful. Great channel and resource.
@@ApolloniaPonti Yes, however goal oriented men are often working 50-60 hours a week, and dating someone at work has become sometimes unacceptable, frowned upon, and in many cases forbidden altogether. So there is not much time for meeting women organically, and yes, perhaps at the gym or some activity like that, however women there are often wanting to meet John Travolta; maybe men are underutilizing internet dating.
Thanks!
Her ex is back in the picture, even though I feel like I did everything right (set up fun dates, had a great time, didn’t chase but did pursue, only talked to her every few days to keep my distance, etc.) she always seemed super into me, but was very inconsistent in communication. I would briefly randomly see her and her attraction would spike and she would start texting me a lot and set up a date.
She then canceled our last date and I found out she was hanging out with her abusive ex from 6 months ago. Sucks 😞
Damn
She doesn’t have any self respect if she goes back to someone who is abusive.
@@calebhodson7421 true! I walked away. Weirdly enough, she randomly commented on my snap story today, and we had a very brief convo. Hadn’t talked to her in 2.5 weeks. Left her on read bc I wanna see if she’ll show more of her cards/interest or if she’s just being friendly
@@davidaustin8424 She's dating other people and unsure, so she will try to keep you around "just in case" best to find someone who loves you consistently and often.
Apollonia reminding me of my worth is making me cry, hard to admit as a man.
I walked away , told her I wanted to date other people (which I didn't want to, but just said it), she didn't have time for me, she was so busy being in everything. I had to be on her calendar (like scheduling a dentist, or doctor, or car work). Got tired of it, so I left her. When I told her I wanted to see other people, she just said: "ok", like it didn't bother her at all. It's been over a month, and all I think about is, did I make a mistake. We have broken up several times in the past 2 years before. I also think she is a Narcissist. She is a demanding person, stubern, hard headed......
If you feel you had a valid reason you did. Don’t be a girl and change your mind once you did something. If she comes back she’ll be much better. Single life is tough but the greatest when you are comfortable with it