Ask Dr. Ramani: What is Gaslighting? | Season 2; Ep 13
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 7 июн 2023
- 🛎 If You're New Subscribe ► bit.ly/SubscribeNN
Dr. Ramani answers your burning questions about gaslighting, a phenomenon so common, it was 2022’s word of the year.
✨Follow me on social:
Instagram - @doctorramani
Pod Instagram - @navigatingnarcissismpod
Facebook - @doctorramani
Twitter - @DoctorRamani
RUclips: @NavigatingNarcissismPod
I want to hear from you, too. Have a toxic topic you want me to explore? Email me at askdrramani@redtabletalk.com. I just might answer your questions on air.
This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a healthcare professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast.
❤️ iHeartRadio » ihr.fm/3Nl7fQy
📢 APPLE PODCASTS » apple.co/3WcYtIh
📢 AMAZON MUSIC » amzn.to/3NmeuaG
🟢 SPOTIFY » spoti.fi/3gNNi8y
🎥 PREVIOUS VIDEO » • Breaking Traumatic Cyc...
🌟 OUR TEAM
EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jada Pinkett Smith, Ellen Rakieten, Dr. Ramani Durvasula, Meghan Hoffman, Fallon Jethroe
VP PRODUCTION OPERATIONS: Martha Chaput
CREATIVE DIRECTOR: Jason Nguyen
LINE PRODUCER: Lee Pearce
PRODUCER: Matthew Jones, Aidan Tanner
ASSOCIATE PRODUCER: Mara De La Rosa
ASSOCIATE CREATIVE PRODUCER: Keenon Rush
HAIR AND MAKEUP ARTIST: Samatha Pack
AUDIO ENGINEER: Calvin Bailiff
EXEC ASST: Rachel Miller
PRODUCTION OPS ASST: Jesse Clayton
EDITOR: Eugene Gordon
POST MEDIA MANAGER: Luis E. Ackerman
POST PROD ASST: Moe Alvarez
AUDIO EDITORS & MIXERS: Matt Wellentin
VP HEAD OF PARTNER STRATEGY: Jae Trevits
DIRECTOR, DIGITAL MARKETING: Sophia Hunter
VP, POST PRODUCTION: Jonathan Goldberg
SVP, HEAD OF CONTENT: Lukas Kaiser
VP, PRODUCTION OPERATIONS: Jacob Moncrief
EXECUTIVE IN CHARGE OF PRODUCTION: Dawn Manning
Narcissists are everywhere and these days it seems like everyone has at least one in their lives! Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist, will help you spot red flags and heal from the narcissist in your life. Every Thursday, we will hear first-hand accounts from people who know this territory the best, the survivors.
New episodes weekly on iHeartRadio.
#NavigatingNarcissism #NavigatingNarcissismPodcast #DrRamaniPodcast #NavigatingNarcissism #NavigatingNarcissismDrRamani #NavigatingNarcissismPodcastDrRamani #DrRamaniPodcast #DrRamanNarcissismPodcast
This program is a blessing. Dr. Ramani should get a statue for her work on mental health education.
She speaks to her camera while directly to each of us...I attribute so much insight and and tools for healing from this extrodinary woman!
@@JudeScott007 The same here, lifechanging, precious advising, priviledge to have access to it!!
Dr Ramini is the best. I wish she were still seeing clients.
@@sandragrewe Looks like Dr. Ramani found the way to make impact on the lives of her "clients", such as me, worldwide... and, I'm taking advantage her services, on the daily basis, for free... what a priviledge!
@@TheSahand68 hello. Are you in contact with Dr Ramini?
Ok, wow. So my entire life was gaslighting. My mother was always denying, minimizing and invalidating my experience...and continues to this day.
Same here! I had to go low contact to save my mental and physical health.
@Amy twitter
Same story with me. After listening to DRRAMINI, you tube channel, I did understand what it felt to be constantly Gaslighted by a parent.
I raised my voice for the first time in my life, "Stop denying my reality," it felt so good. Sadly, it didn't stop it
Gone very low contact for sanity sake
Invaluable advice with this podcast
@@realhealing7802 I know. I told my mom I might have to do that.
@@maevebutler4641 I like to remind my mom on a regular basis that she isn't allowed to deny reality with me. I remind her that it isn't going to work
As a empath scapegoat, your Mom as she gets older will just get worse to the point that everything she touches is toxic. You have to tell everyone, run away and change your name or write a book. Be free from the fanatical narcissist! Be healthy be healed!
I'll never forget the day I burst and I looked my mom square in the eye after she gaslighted me and said very slyly, "You're right, and I believe you, and everything you see is exactly how things are, and I'm so proud of you." She gave me the most devilish stare. Those responses don't do anything in the end though, it still happens every day. I just stopped engaging.
Ya know what has caused the most damage? Medical gaslighting. All the gaslighting from my abusive ex-husband, abusive family, and my son's abusive paternal family... none of it has been as damaging as the medical gaslighting. What's worse is that a huge part of my chronic symptoms seem to be from abuse. Being trwatwd like I'm crazy and a liar by the people gatekeeping wellness and healing is indescribable.
My husband did the same yelling in the car after two year seperation.He told me he changed, I believed him, but this last yelling was the last point that made me go no contact with him.
I also think that the uptick in people using therapy language allows gaslighters to change the framing of what they are doing. So in addition to understanding gaslighting and therapy terminology, a persistent pattern of “disagreeing” with you whenever you relate your experience should raise a flag
Any negation of one's reality (with or without gaslighting) is a major redflag in any kind relationship or circumstance.
Asking ourselves how we feel when we meet people, I like this, trusting our instincts ❤️
Thank you so much for this video.The word is truly overused. As a child, I had neglectful parents who were abusive to each other. There are some definite narcissistic personality traits. As a teen, I was sexualized by almost every male adult I was around (outside of my family). I was sexualy abused by a teacher at 16. I was raped at 18. I never told anyone until I was trying to have a baby with my husband and struggled with infertility & repeated pregnancy loss. What made it more difficult was that I was married to a narcissist. I lasted 5 years in the relationship until I tried to kill myself from a lifetime of trauma. I eventually did leave because I was blessed to give birth to a daughter. I was horrified at the possibility she would see our relationship and think it was love. I got into an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship that lasted on and off, up and down, back and forth for 11 years. One week ago today, we got into a bad argument. I told him he wasn't going to gaslight me...he went off. I've blocked all of his numbers and emails go directly to spam. Your videos have helped me with all of the unhealthy relationships in my life. You've helped me not feel so much shame for allowing accepting poor treatment. You've encouraged me to examine my life and to give myself grace because I truly never had a chance to form healthy self-image, attachment, or boundaries. Thank you for being passionate about this topic. It's made a world of difference ❤
Stay strong
Excited to listen to this during the day!
Sometimes I think the biggest phrase that slips under the radar and is often weaponized for gaslighting is : "YOU don't understand...."
I don't know. But there ARE times when other people we talk to don't understand. Even we who have been through hell when we stayed with a narcissist. There are so many different ways people interpret words and phrases.
@@spiritual2020 people can understand all type of things, we have experienced all type of emotions and we can understand how something can feel very intense for someone, but someone is trying to beeing supporting and being there with you stating that they understand you and you deny them understanding you, that is also kind of denial, just because someone has not gone throw the same exact experience as you did, it dose not mean that a person can not understand the emotional heaviness behind a situation, they do not have to jump in the trances with you and the whole point is also not to reinforce the trauma but to be there with people and aknowledge their just but not to make it more intense. You could go to a therapist and they have seen all type of things and they themselves might have not been throw the same thing you are going throw but they still have understanding for your experience and if you tell them "they don't understand you" then you are also just trying to diminish other people level of emotional intelligence.
@@miriamceornea97 I get all that. Which is why I started my short yet brief comment with the sentence I don’t know. I choose to not jump on the bandwagon when people accuse every Tom, Dick, and Harry, Jane, Sue, and Nancy as it comes to labeling someone else a narcissist. I’ve never been one to label my own self or others or jump on bandwagons.
@@KAT-dg6el Exactly!! One thing I never do is automatically believe someone is victim of a narcissist just because they say there are or have been. Especially here on RUclips. Even more so, those who accuse everyone in their family is one. Oh, but they’re not. Perhaps those who make those types of accusations are in the very beginning of learning about narcissism so they find it easy to blame and attack.
Even though we may be noticing more narcissistic behavior from others (which BTW all of us have narcissistic tendencies), it doesn’t make those other people a narcissist.
Even professionals make sure to inform us of that fact. Perception is wide and broad. Just because we have a perception of something or someone does not mean our perception is factual. Facts trump feelings. Being truly honest, expressing real actual events WHILE recognizing our own emotions, actions, reactions, behaviors is paramount so that we ourselves look in the mirror to take responsibility of what we did and said. I’ve seen it over and over and over again for decades before I even knew what narcissism was, how people cast blame on everything and everyone else, playing the victim card. That right there is a sad thing to see. Words matter.
39:07 withholding the attention the narc is looking for is EVERYTHING!
Y’all would not believe the look on a Karen’s face when you absolutely pay her no mind when she’s pitching a fit
The explanation of verbal abuse in the intimate space of a car sent shivers down my spine. Thanks so much for all your explanations Dr Ramani 💜
Endless hugs and praises for you Dr Ramani!!
You are a gem ❤
🎶 Gaslight, projectionn triangulation 🎶 to the tune of heartburn, indigestion, diarrhea! 😁
"Why are you bringing that up? Just forgive me and move on!"
It's laughable, honestly. Smh
I had that said to me recently from a guy I ended up having to call the cops to report him stalking cause he wouldn't leave me alone after I told him "Good luck finding a woman for you." The reason he said that question is because I asked a question I had asked once before and I couldn't remember the answer so I asked again for clarification. I went off on him cause I ain't putting up with shit. I said back to him; "I can ask any damn question I want. I just wanted some clarity." Then he said; "You're right. You can ask any question you want.
I was questioning myself Why am I trying to be friends with this person? Didn't last long. Not even 4 months. Within that time frame, I was starting to see patterns I didn't like that made me uneasy and uncomfortable. He would talk in short one-word sentences. Like 'oh okay' a lot. He was an odd man. Initially, I thought he was cool. We had a good time the first few times we got together to do things. But when in alone time, he was soooooo freaking boring.
In Kara's case, regarding a gaslighting husband who is having a relationship with a coworker, here us my advice: if you can, get rid of him, divorce this trash!!! The whole story makes me sick to my stomach.
I agree! My ex husband was angry with me when I caught him texting his co-worker behind my back. I thought I was supposed to be the angry one, not him.
This video is to me, one of the best Dr Ramani's videos on RUclips (I've seen them all). And the audio is so well recorded and edited that I can't stop imagining her voicing an animated movie character.
She does know how to give voice and mood to emotions in her examples.
And it's a beautiful voice.
Priviledge of accessing your program is one of the best presents I got in life, Dr. Ramani. I am learning and re-learning from you on the daily basis. Knowledge I'm getting from your programs is influencing my decisions to improve my life. I just want you to know this.
.
Ooh! I LOVE "Hey, Navigators!"❤❤❤❤❤
Therapy,when done right, is one the most important turn right in increasing self awareness.
Wow these enablers part was great, still dealing with them. When I first wanted to leave, one of the enablers told me that I am the craziest one, later admitted that she would be ashamed if everyone heard that I left the narcissist, thinking social statuquo
I can’t tell you how much I am grateful for this podcast, Dr ramani and her team 🙏
During the pandemic, the ex was telling me I can not go shopping because I was not taking right decisions, he was manipulating me to control me financially.
Most people think gaslighting is just lying. It’s frustrating to try to explain gaslighting. It’s frustrating trying to explain why I have a need to show proof of everything to everyone all the time even if I know they already believe me. Gaslighting over time causes brain damage, right?
This was such a good episode. And especially since you put your own personal experiences in there again. I really truly appreciate you sharing some of the stuff about still struggling to second-guess if someone says you forgot to put the book back. It's very helpful because if you are professional specifically in this stuff, can still struggle with that, then it tells me that I'm not crazy or defective or something isn't wrong with me because I still struggle with it after years and Decades of similar abuse from all sides.
Oooo,😮 I just remembered. Growing up, my dad would make it a necessity to "PROVE EVERYONE WRONG". UUUGGGHHH this was soooooo exhausting. Now that both my parents are deceased, I noticed that I'm not ruminating as often. 🤔it feels very relaxing. 😌
I always felt something is wrong with me, I guess I need therapy.
My boss is constantly making me feel bad about my choices and tries to control the situation so I don’t dare to do different what he wants. Lot of guilt tripping. There is no set hours so he is using advantage of it. We are suppose to negate the hours and times. He has grandiose sense of self and everyone around him is with mental problems, that’s what he keeps hinting. So he is the great healer who knows all and can judge and rule. It is very exhausting and I’m starting to see it so clear. I’m in the process of exiting the job.
Because you chose to benefit from me you also choose to respect me and my human dignity. You don't get the choice of devaluing me and discarding me.
in the mental health world it's not necessary to admit that those of us inside, do not need to mention when we look out to the community for our attachment needs, because we are 'inside the club."
But do not forget that since we all live in this world, we are all inside this world, therefore we are already attached. Watching RUclips videos would not mean you are looking out for attachment needs to be met if you use the same thinking of those of us inside the mental health community.
Power restored!
those of us in mental health who behave with any level of instability are not allowed to destabilize the people we are supposed to serve with games of "we are secure, you are insecure" "you have, you have not"
Dr Ramani, you look so pretty🤗. I love this new podcast format. Thank you so much for what you’re doing. I went through the first half of my life not making sense. Because of you I understand what I was experiencing in my younger years and I can now move forward with optimism for the future ❤
Excellent advice and video on gaslighting in general.
Doctor can you do one on grooming?
I can listen to things that are not good but I also still stand to the fact that there is good in everyone but it dose not mean that we should promote abuse 😅 if someone is mistreating you, go away and know that somewhere in that person there is good but you are still not going to share a life with them further on and they will still have to change, it's not an excuse to stay in an abusive relationship by all means 🤔
Hello Dr Ramini, my question is this " How can I support a friend or coworker while they are grieving or going through difficult times without gaslighting them or denying they're reality? "
@40:36 father did this all the time. Will add you cannot react normally because they WILL crash the car.
Get out of the car the second it stops.
Absolutely tremendous, Thank you so much for this DR Ramani , I'm glad this topic is being discussed and the information is getting out there to people, Gaslight in to make someone question themselves and their reality, Memory, Perceptions and judgments, I have a strong sense of self and I trust myself, This speaks volumes, Thank you for all the magnificent work you do, Peace, love and respect to you and everyone, Thank you universe, All glory to the most high God 🎆💚♱❤😃💜⚖✌🦄🍎🍏😘🚀☘🕆🌈💛💗💙🌹🐎🕊🌲🌌
As
Stevie Wonder
As around the sun the earth knows she's revolving
And the rosebuds know to bloom in early may
Just as hate knows love's the cure
You can rest your mind assure
That I'll be loving you always
As now can't reveal the mystery of tomorrow
But in passing will grow older every day
Just as all that's born is new
You know what I say is true
That I'll be loving you always
Always
(Until the ocean covers every mountain high)
Always
(Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea)
Always
(Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream)
Did you know that true love asks for nothing
No no her acceptance is the way we pay
Did you know that life has given love a guarantee
To last through forever and another day
Just as time knew to move on since the beginning
And the seasons know exactly when to change
Just as kindness knows no shame
Know through all your joy and pain
That I'll be loving you always
As today I know I'm living
But tomorrow could make me the past
But that I mustn't fear
For I'll know deep in my mind
The love of me I've left behind
'Cause I'll be loving you always
Always
(Until the trees and seas just up and fly away)
Always
(Until the day that eight times eight times eight is four)
Always
(Until the day that is the day that are no more)
Did you know you're loved by somebody
(Until the day the earth starts turnin' right to left)
Always
(Until the earth just for the sun denies itself)
I'll be lovin' you forever
(Until dear mother nature says her work is through)
Always
(Until the day that you are me and I am you)
Always
(Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky
Until the ocean severs every mountain high)
Always mm mm
We all know sometimes life hates and troubles
Can make you wish you were born in another time and space
But you can bet your lifetimes that and twice it's double
That God knew exactly where he wanted you to be placed
So make sure when you say you're in it, but not of it
You're not helpin' to make this earth
A place sometimes called hell
Change your words into truths
And then change that truth into love
And maybe our children's grandchildren
And their great grandchildren will tell
I'll be loving you until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Stevie Wonder
Saying you go into therapy thinking there is something wrong with us and coming out realizing there is nothing wrong with us, was very very touching, that I have not heard in that manner, I believe, in that manner, not boastful but just realizing we are not that terrible people we tell ourselves we are (obviously if it reflect the truth) also kind of gives me that extra motivation that it is okay to admit to being a good and kind person and it might also just be that we have to learn to set better boundaries with whom we know we would let influence us in a way that is going to be hurtful in the long run, I have heard this type of things a lot but somehow it hits differently depending on whom you are listening too and your way of saying it felt just very true and very deep, thank you 🤗
Love this talk. I have dealt with this work. And I have learned it takes confidence and courage to be straight forward with the gaslighter. You have look them in the eye speak with confidence. And stick to what is right. Not to worry about anything be like wild animal. To this day the gaslighter has stopped and walks on eggshells around me. Almost as if it’s flipped. I just keep the work environment to work .
What is the difference between manipulation and gaslighting? I've been in situations where I think the manipulation was still an approach to do their gas lighting although indirectly.
Got my heart broken again back to binging dr Ramani’s podcast to educate myself on breaking the cycle 😤🫶🏼💕
So.....when you mentioned being gaslighted in a car, this happened to me when I was married from 1986-2001. It was in year 9 of our marriage and we were headed to VA, driving S towards Baltimore. I was feeling pretty good and safe (at the moment anyway). My husband was driving and I was sitting in the passenger seat. I opened up about a dream I had. A dream, meaning a real dream in life I wanted to accomplish. I worked out before he and I ever met. I continued working out while married. After my 3 child was born, I bought one of 'The Firm' workout DVDs. I mentioned to my husband that I would love for us to one day move to South Carolina and me teach there. Boy Oh Boy! Damn! The first thing out of his mouth was, "You got a boyfriend down there?" I said "NO!" He continues: "Is that your plan? You want to move down there to be with him?" At this point, I just went silent. He was already driving fast. I had no exit signs to look at. What I did have to look at out of the passenger window was a small continual grassy hill. I swear the worst thing that crossed my mind that I had REAL FEAR about, was that he would pull over, stop the car, and yell at me to get out! If he had done that, I thought I was going to end up dead because some other man was going to see me walking, crying my eyes out, make me get in his car, drive to wherever rape me, then murder me. Thank God, that didn't happen. Instead, my ex continued to drive what seemed extremely fast, and he punched the passenger side windshield. That fucking windshield shattered. We all know how thick and sturdy a windshield is and he shattered it with his punch. He never hit me. This was the first time I thought he really would have hit me. Yet he controlled himself enough to hit the windshield instead of me. I continued to sit in silence. The reason he punched the windshield was because I was already silent after he accused me of having a BF in S. Carolina. He yelled at me, "So, you're not going to talk?!!" What the fuck was I supposed to do other than be silent? Because I already knew me saying anything, he wasn't going to believe me anyway. I hated him that day. I don't know how many minutes went by and he asked me if I cheated. Keep in mind, that our marriage was already bad and had been bad for many years. So, I answered him honestly and said yes. I repeat;: I DID NOT HAVE A BF IN S. CAROLINA. THE UNFAITHFULNESS WAS A ONE-TIME THING. Just because someone cheats, DOES NOT make one a narcissist. He had been manipulating me for years. Everything was always MY FAULT. Not once did he ever accept responsibility. A woman will only tolerate so much for so long before going outside the marriage. I never did anything vindictive. He's the one that did vindictive things to me.
Anyway, he continued driving. He asked me if we could go somewhere to get help. I said okay. He drove to a hospital. We get out of the vehicle and walk into the hospital. It must have been a side door. No one was around. We saw someone walking towards us asking us if we needed any help. My husband yells at the top of his lungs, "MY WIFE CHEATED ON ME!! WE NEED HELP!" I'm thinking: 'WTH JC. He didn't have to yell.' That person directed us to a room and went and got someone else to talk to us. I have no clue who this bitch was. Based on what she asked me, there is no way she was a Psychologist or Psychiatrist. She was asking me how did it feel? Did you like it? Again, I'm thinking WTH!!! Stupid dumb me answered her honestly WHILE my husband was in this same room.
Anyway, it truly was one big fucked up day. I stayed married to this ass for another 6 years because I believed I was a no one, nothing, and didn't have a college degree. I was a proud stay-at-home mom. My ex-husband was one sick disgusting prick. Back then I knew nothing about narcissism. I just knew my husband was a highly intelligent controlling man who didn't physically hit his wife; me. I have multiple stories I could say. I actually wrote a book about it. "Angel Works: Soaring From Abuse to Love, Forgiveness, and Enlightenment'
ITS THE ABCENSE OF MIDDLE GROUND THAT MAKES IT SO DIFFICULT (SO IMPOSSIBLE)
FIGHTING BACK
GIVING IN
AGREEING WITH FOR PEACE
The car thing ! I used to want to open the door and just step out to escape !!!
Phenonmenal episode. Dr Ramani always nails gaslighting. Love learning from her about this stuff.
Just on the gaslighting theme... Do a video on a Narcissistic Apology. OMG. (I cant imagine why I would do that, but IF I did that, and IF it made you feel bad, then I am sorry YOU feel that way. I wasn't making good decisions at the time.......)
When in a car with a narc, I tend to think of the "Vacation scene with Rusty and Audry in the back seat". They look at eachother and put on their headphones, "Ay Oh Let's go. Aye Oh Let's go".😅
I can only thank you for your work and validation in favour of narcisists' victims. You helped me becoming aware of my cognitive dissonance despite my attachment human need of love. Painful.. but you contributed breaking me free ❤
So gaslighting is an umbrella term for a combination of things that can be used to manipulate someone emotionally and psychologically?
I recently developed a charlie horse while driving through a busy stretch of freeway. I had to disengage from my physical discomfort to maintain my own safety.
(How did it look? Looking back, I succeeded by having a mental image of myself that was functioning without a cramp.)
Am I a narcissist for wanting a better life? I feel like I am losing my mind I am competent and I feel like I have no worth.
Quick question: When you're talking about gaslighting when recollecting the past, (around 13 minutes in), you talk about differences in recall, but what about person A trying to ask "why did X happen?" and person B going "X is all your own fault", does that also count as gaslighting?
This is one of the most helpful videos I have watched from you Dr Ramani. I watch your videos almost every night to help regain my sanity and have for years. Thankyou for what you do ❤
You are so welcome!
Another amazing hour with Dr. Ramani and her incredible insights and understanding. Thank you!
Thank you Dr Ramani, as always your work is profoundly helpful, informative and healing to so many people.
I'd also just like just say how wonderful it is to watch someone who personally carries themselves with so much Grace and humility doing such important Work :)
Thank you so much for explaining this so well. I am currently dealing with a family member that is constantly gaslighting. This is very helpful.
Thank you so much for your doing this episode and going into such great detail. Your choice such good questions, and providing such nuanced answers, is really helpful for those of us trying to navigate the more covert versions of this that we may be dealing with on a pervasive level in our lives, and also recognizing that we find ourselves with very little recourse and or tools and resources in order to be able to stay grounded or find solutions to the situations and circumstances that we find ourselves in that are so unhealthy around this gas lighting topic that is poorly handled thus far, even though it was a word of 2022. Even the Mislabeling as gaslighting in the Starbucks and other examples are to me maybe there is something going on in those folks Minds that would make them think they are being gas-lit or that they are experiencing self questioning at the very least. Meaning, maybe it's projecting, or because they are now questioning themselves, or self blaming, they project that onto the barista, etc.
Thank you
I don't think Gaslighting should be exclusively linked to the denigration and blame shifting that (sometimes) takes place afterwards. That's dangerous because most narcissistic people passively-aggressively deny the reality of their targets. If people stop using the term whenever someone is trying to deny their perception of reality, then they will start making excuses with abusive partners, family members, friends, coworkers, etc. This is one video where I disagree because it could do more harm than good in the long term. I agree with another poster who said ANY denial of reality should and must be considered a major red flag in any relationship.
Thank you ❤️
I'm very intuitive in general. With about half of my experiences that I tell my parents about, they seem to not believe me. But than they deny my intuitions.
I never use the word "intuition" with them. It's a very triggering word for superficial people. Because it can't be proven.
They are too logical for their own good. 😡
Well thats a shame
Fantastic
Awesome video!
Thank you so much for giving us this insightful and caring speech. Your videos have helped me a lot during the past 2 years. Wish you all the best Dr. Ramani.
😢 thank you
What is gaslighting? Parliament said it better: Flashlight , Neon lights, Stop signs, Red lights 🎶 WAKEUP!
I've got gaslighters in my life unfortunately. Watching this , when you mentioned the car I just burst out laughing, what the hell is wrong with these people !!! Why do they have to do this to people. Yep trapped in the car.... Whew !!! What would they respond with if you did something completely out of character & just turned around & punched them in the head ? I know that's not a solution and a bad way to let anger and frustration out but how would they respond then I wonder. Would it cure their gaslighting or make it worse ???
How do I heal from gaslighting if theres not one person available to validate my unique experience?
The narc said "you could have built this place in a nicer way, why did you allowed this to happen." Keep repeating it for so many times, could be daily, weekly.
Please people dont throw these words out at everything. It ruins it for the real victims of gaslighting. Its serious and should be a crime. It destroys people!
I don't like it either. Some people go full throttle assuming, accusing another person is a narcissist or gaslighting or ghosting, or whatever other words are out there that are being used as psychobabble when a lot of people don't know the true meaning of the words. So, I am glad Dr. Ramani made this video explaining precisely what gaslighting is. People misuse passive aggressive too.
If the person gaslighting or narcism have no intention to be that way, then why is it not wise to reveal them?
Harry: “Did Meghan ever say that they were racist?”
You are so right about not calling them out I called out my mom a couple of years ago and it has been nothing but trauma Drummond trouble for me since
I used to think that if I got good grades in college, all I would have to do, is work hard to be successful. Not true, and this is why. Eventually, I.have to leave. However if I find out that something nafarious is going on, I. will do everything I can to shut down the company, and then everyone looses their job. All the enablers, backstabbers, flying monkeys are gone.. Really, they didn't see this coming? One of my managers insulated me by saying that I needed to work to pay my bills. Who doesn't? What an idiot! After that business shut down I found out that she and her husband had liens on their home. Also, her husband filed for divorce. The beauty of it, she never knew where it came from.😮 Be careful who you mess with, Pandora's box has some very unpleasant revelations 😢.
"It's all just in your head"....gaslighting speech
Vandalism & robbing my home is not gaslighting. Installed hidden cameras in my house is not gaslighting. Recording my conversations with no consent is not gaslighting. It’s a felony.
Barista example wouldn't even be gaslighting unless they had ongoing relationship
What about if someone hacks your router to the point the electronics fail and you can never prove it
This is a great video to get her baseline.
The chin thrust up what does this tell you?
The look on face when she takes deep breath in, what does this mean?
The look in her eye and face when she says, "that didn't feel good", is it impish?
The closing eyes and look on face when she says, "people who have inconsistent empathy, very little empathy, theyre entitled, grandiose"
The look on face when she says need to have a lot of control,
The look on her face when she says all narcissists gaslight
The looks down when she says you blame yourself, you doubt yourself,
The eye wink when she says don't trust me,
The pursed lips when she says, "even though youre an incredibly competent person"
Getting her baseline 7:35 the look on her face the shaking head,
The appointments, the gaslighter doubled down
7:54 the look on face and lips when she says "instead"
8:14 her entire train of thought
You need to also get her baseline when she's dressed in her glasses and her college comfy clothes, you need to get her baseline when she's in dress with dark lipstick and signing books, you need to get baseline when she's allegedly handed over her power to the Uber drivers in her life, she claims to feel embarrassed to ask a driver to pull over so she can check to ensure she's getting on her flight with everything she needs for her trip, she claims to hand over power,😢 after you get baseline and she goes into interview with Cheryl and people like Cheryl and her behavior is different than baseline, you can understand her psychology.
Kinda surprised by the topic and the host considering red table talks affiliation with Jada pinkett Smith...
💎💎
Is it still gaslighting if they do this but you don't fall for it?
Okay. Further on in the video, you answer this question.
💜☮️💡
Is that how it worked for you in your sound proof room with yourself 😂😂
I literally opened the car door while in motion and got out! I very very upset I went into a 7-Eleven for help. I then had to take at least 20 minutes to calm down and cry to get back in the car to go home. This was in Philadelphia.
I'm next state down in Delaware!! Southern part of Delaware
😀
Help me
She is changing the world
There's been plenty of people changing the world before she jumped in.
How's Jada, Ramani?
lol
So is the person calling the barista a gaslighter actually the gasliighter hmmm😮
One thing that Dr Remini dosen't address more pointedly is the individual (ie me) who tends to be absent minded and not punctual as a general rule.
Their susceptibility to being a victim of gaslightinding is two fold because they already accept the fact that they may be wrong...
If you lost this channel I’m glad
I try explaining how contextual gaslighting is. Some passerby on the street saying the same thing wouldn't worry me at all. That scenario actually has been used to say I couldn't cope out in public!