Hi Milena i’ve been married almost 14 yrs (also got married young at 22 yrs old :) the advices i can give - have sex often (the more you do it, the better you get at it and the more you will desire your spouse) nothing destroys more a marriage than lack of intimacy - do you want to be happily married or do you want to be right? (let go of petty arguments) - remember that you are on the same team - learn to fight/argue in a healthy way - children are a result of your love; dont let them become the core of your marriage - your healthy relationship is the core of your family ****i want to add one more : learn each other’s love language (gary chapman’s - the 5 love languages book should be read by every newlywed IMO)
TLDR: quality sex is more important than the quantity of sex Great thoughts! I would just add that instead of frequent sex, make sure to have good sex. Really focus on pleasuring your partner. You can have sex everyday, but if it isn’t very mutually pleasurable/enjoyable, then the intimacy will be lost:/ And of course, if the sex is actually good and pleasurable, you will desire your partner more (so it may end up becoming more frequent!).
My best marriage advice is James 1:19, "be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry". This applies to more than just marriage, but it was something that really helped me the first year of marriage adjusting to living together.
When Jordan said something like “Don’t let being under the same roof, sleeping together, always being together be an excuse to not serve them” the conviction hit hard with that one!! I was blessed by this video!! Thank y’all!! 💛💛
@@mimad4923I agree with you, I want to be loved and respected not just loved and the Bible also instructs husbands to respect their wives too in some translations which some people don’t seem to know in the church.
Jordan mentioned putting fences over fences to guard your marriage from infidelity. I would love to learn more about what that looks like for you both. if you do a podcast or video on it I would love to listen to it
you two seem like you’re in a much healthier place in your marriage & you both just seem so in love… like in the very beginning! 🥹 love you guys and your growth.
My husband and I got married at 20 and 21. If I could change one thing… I wish we would’ve gotten married younger. Now we are almost 20 years in! Growing old with your spouse is a beautiful thing.
So much truth in this! Me and my husband got married when I was 19 and he was 20, so many people doubted us because we were young but we listened to God and He made a way! We will be celebrating 4 years of marriage this august and it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. We already have so many testimonies of Gods faithfulness and there is more to come! Love you guys, thank you for your honesty and encouragement ❤
Married at 18 and 19 now married for 20 years with a 19 and 16 year old daughters. 100% would get married at that age again!! I would say the hardest part was our parents butting in! All our arguments were surrounded by our parents and not knowing how to set boundaries with them.
I’m not Christian, I definetely believe in God and honestly I love your content since I was pregnant with my baby girl back in 2020 and I love this union you guys have, your values, your team work even far from the religious takes 🙏🏻 much respect
Jesus is the way and the Truth and he loves you. He knew you before you were in your mothers womb. You are precious and created with such beautiful purpose. I hope and pray that you know this Martina ❤️
Married at 18/19 and this year we celebrate 5 years. I wish I knew how much family boundaries were needed at that age. We also went through so many trails within our first 3 years of marriage between my dad and step mom dying within two months of each other in 2021. I wish that when we got married we had a realistic view point in knowing that things will happen and challenge us, but that through the fire it strengthens. Thankful to be growing up together and creating the memories through the years. High school graduation, college, pets, first home. It’s such a journey.
How did you get through family boundaries? My husband and I married in our late twenties but once we did we had two very close family members trying to parent us and judged every decision we made, although we were established and able to make those decisions. We still don’t have a relationship with them 3 years later but we would like to. We tried to communicate our issues with them and it went horribly.
I’m not married but desire to be in the future and this video is so good! God’s given you guys such an anointing and I just want to encourage you both that I believe you are stewarding well what the Father has given to you. Thank you for being obedient to the call of the LORD!
The two major pieces of advice I would give newlyweds is this: work mostly on your walk with Jesus and always keep that the number one priority because HE is the One who is going to give you the type of insight that no one else can for your specific marriage. This can literally make or break your marriage. Secondly, you WILL make mistakes because every couple does, so try not to beat yourselves up about it or live in regret because sometimes you just don’t know any better and you’re just trying to do the best you can.
Thank you for sharing! I hope it reaches so many who can learn from this video. I've been married for 6 years and we were 30 and 31 so, not as young BUT completely agree on the bank account thing!!! Absolutely makes you like roomates when you have seperate accounts and its so helpful for building towards our goals as a couple. And the encouragement to the stay at home moms is sooo important. That part was so spot on and I wish every mom could hear that and feel the value they bring to the family. Even though I am not one, I have friends who are so I love that.
My husband and I married when I was 16. I know that’s insane for most people lol. But we just celebrated 10 years last month and there is definitely a difference in who we are then and now. What really matters is allowing the Lord to come into your marriage and guide the two of you in it.
I got married at 18 years old and we just celebrated 5 years with our sweet baby boy! Your channel has been so beneficial to me in many ways with your love of Jesus and advice on being a wife and a mother.
This September will be our seven year marriage anniversary and one thing I would tell young couples is to let go of any prejudice you had regarding the home life and childhood you grew up with. This is something I am still working on, but I think in the past couple years we’ve made big improvements, but I would say a lot of the arguments I had with my husband stemmed from negative associations I had with the dynamic between my parents and trying to undo things. My parents did via my husband even though my husband is a totally different person and he is nothing like my father and hasn’t shown traits similar to my father, but I was just so adamant not to become my mother that I put all my childhood negativity on my husband’s shoulders, and that wasn’t fair to him so that’s some thing I would say especially if you grew up in not so perfect Christian household.
You guys are so blessed to have found each other. It is great that you two are so connected and on the same page. I love that you are helping other couples.
Thank-you for being such a blessing. I regret not getting married sooner, dated for 7 years been married for 5 years. We knew we wanted to get married within the first year but waited until we were more ‘stable’. I can report that we are still not as ‘stable’ according to worldly standards. But by the grace of Gods we are happily married.
My husband and I have known each other since we were 10 and 11 years old. We've been married for 7 years, and we have a total of 3 children. We are a minimalist family, living within our means. We started taking the minimalist journey about 2 years ago. It's honesty a mind switch. Our society tells us we need more, but we actually don't.
Married for almost 13 years now and got married when I was 20. Definitely agree with so much, you all said! And yes, for the same bank account. We did that from the start. Also prayed a lot during our courtship and for God to guide us. The thing we wanted before we got married was to buy our first home (which we did together). I didn't want to live with mom and in-laws. Also, I finished college, and we had a simple but great Portuguese/ Brazilian wedding with close family and friends. Almost 13 years later and happily married with 3 kids, mortgage and debt free, and we currently live off grid. I love that I got married young too! Definitely feel that God has been the center from the start and will be till the end ❤
SLEEP! SLEEP IS SO HARD WHEN YOU FIRST GET MARRIED! We didn't live together and we were both virgins so my husband was the first man in my bed and it is VERY different than having your best girl friend over for a sleepover. We also have the exact opposite things we need to sleep. Warm vs cold. White noise vs silence. Squishy vs hard bed. Etc. It was a lot to get used to. My advice is to have a real night time routine to get yourself ready for sleep. No blue light, drinking sleepy time tea, drink Calm sleep mix (avoid melatonin because it can give you scary dreams which is NOT what you need), read in bed or talk to settle down, etc. We both had very dark circles under our eyes for the first few months of marriage but we figured it out eventually. Just a heads up! 😴
I’m getting married in 97 days to the boy, now man I’ve been with for 6 years as high school sweethearts now 22! This came right on time and I needed to hear these things! Thank you, Mil for sharing this! And thank the LORD for sending this !❤
It always makes me so happy to hear about couples who have been married young/younger! My husband and I got married when we were 20, had been dating since we were 13 (in the 7th grade), and we went through a lot with our families. It was such a crazy season of life, so when the wedding day finally came it was like we reached the finish line of dating and could look forward to the rest of our lives together, learning and growing. Thank you so much for your videos and for coming to such a public space to be so vulnerable and honest!
My husband and I have been married for a year now and the past 6 months it’s really been on my heart that I don’t want to be a nagging wife and it definitely is difficult but I can tell things have been better between us, especially letting it go and not reacting and holding resentment!!! Love watching and learning from you two!
Perfect timing video as I'm about to get married in a couple of months ( I'm 21 he's 23) so this video just hit the spot! I just love that you guys are looking out for the younger generation, may God bless your beautiful family and the work you guys are doing ❤
My husband and I have learned to be invested in small things that bring us joy together. For us that's shopping (like really getting invested in finding the best deal and the thing that looks best on my cute husband hehe), getting ready for church, finding a good lunch spot, or a great place for a nice evening walk. We've found that putting energy into those moments makes our marriage feel so joyful and fulfilling. Like we are with our best friend. and that's such a blessing.
I graduated from a Christian high school. The majority of those who have been married are now divorced….I’m 24. There is something about age and wisdom when it comes to marriage
@Milena, I just want to say how much I appreciate what you and your family are doing. I remember when I was looking for Christian people to follow on RUclips, your channel came up and I'm glad that I was able to subscribe. I have never been married, but I still enjoy listening to your thoughts/feelings on different issues. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for this! Been married year and a half and with an 11 month old. I used to have a good job, but been an adjustment being a stay at home mom and being ok with no longer having my own income. Been watching the both of you since before your first arrived! Thank you for being so encouraging and keeping me thinking about how to live my faith in married life.☺️
This is so good. If I were to give any advice to a young couple it would be to guard your marriage. Be cautious about who you vent to or go to for advice. My husband and I only speak to people that we know the other would feel comfortable with us venting to. We don’t complain to our parents or siblings. We have trusted friends (that have been married longer than us) whom we feel safe knowing even the no so flattering parts of us. Additionally we don’t confide in people of the opposite sex. We don’t want to leave an open door for any opportunity for emotion infidelity or physical for that matter. In short, guess your marriage like you guard your heart. ❤ Thanks for talking about these things. I appreciate you two!
19 & 20 ❤ grateful we learned all this and more in only our first two years of marriage but it was definitely a roller coaster. My biggest advice would be setting very firm boundaries with family and friends; 99% of our arguments ended being outside sources.
I have been married for 10 years. I think it's very cool to hear the husband's perspective of marriage and what do I should do or be like. I've been following you for the years and I think it is very noticeable and the changes that you and Jordan has been throughout the years. Even the way you express yourself and I think is Honorable I think you are doing amazing God bless you both and your little ones you are a little ones.
I got married when I was 18. We have been married for 21 years. Making your spouse priority is so important. Don't correct your husband in public. It really doesn't matter if it was 5 or 3 of something. Whenever you get into a disagreement turn to God by opening his word and praying.This is how God can soften your heart. Everytime I do God tells me what I know is true but my flesh doesn't want to be true. Don't say negative things about your spouse. Lift him up. Don't ever stop flirting with eachother and having fun together. Do things together. I go fishing with my husband and will work on something else while he fishes.
Love this! I was 19 and my husband was 20 when we got married. Now we are A little over three years in. It has been such a blessing, watching the Lord work in our lives.
Thanks for sharing your advice for newlyweds! My husband and I have been married just over a year, and we were 22 and 23 when we got married, right after we both graduated from college. I loved the advice that Jordan gave for wives to study their husbands. In our first year of marriage, my husband and I hit some rough spots with how to communicate and understand one another. However, I feel that as of lately I’ve learned when is a good time to talk to him and share my heart with him, and I’ve also started learning some more about his interests. As you said, our spouses are always changing, so I pray that with God’s help I’ll continue to learn about my husband as he changes throughout our marriage. Gods blessings to you and your family! 🤍
My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years and it can not be more true about luring about one another! We have been together since I was 14 and he was 17. (We are 23 and 26 now) to say the least we have changed a lot since then is a understatement. I would say though the most important thing for the marriage is to stay in the world of God pray together!
I have literally binge watched your videos and listened to almost all your podcast episodes in the past 2 months 🤍 thank you for creating meaningful and inspiring online content 😍 so inspire me so so much and I look up to you as to my big sister I never had! Be blessed in everything 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Milena you mentioned there’s no scripture that directly says that a couple should have a joint bank account but I feel like this verse supports that idea too! “‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.” Mark 10:7-8 NIV One flesh works united so having separate bank accounts in my eyes goes against that idea. It gives way for temptation and doesn’t allow you to keep your partner accountable 💛
I 100% agree with the bank accounts! My sister & her husband have had separate bank accounts and have been extremely close to divorce more than once. He would withhold money from her etc… the lack of unity is a HUGE problem
I have 1 Corinthians wrote on my board for my Verse of the Week and have truly felt like God is trying to lead me to a season to learn what calls a woman to be to her home. I love your videos and for God to speak through you today to me individually through your video 🥹 Never stop showing God flavors over you!
My mom nagged my father so much it hurt my heart as a kid, so even my husband will say we never nag eachother, I saw so much of what it does to a person.
This is great! I do want to say that you don’t necessarily need one bank account as long as you are treating finances as one. I’m not sure how this works in America but in my country you can’t have your own credit score via a shared account, there is always a primary holder. So basically, we’ve got 2 accounts but budget and spend money as if it’s completely pooled. We wanted to each have a credit score because if something were to happen to either of us, we want the other person to have a credit score against their name. 😊
I agree with you! My husband and I have been together for 12 years and have always had separate accounts. It’s not about the separate accounts, it’s about the communication of finance. Even in their examples the area that lacks is how a couple is communicating about money. People can share a bank account and still claim “this is my portion of the money because I brought in this much.”
Really insightful! We have been married for 5 years and have 2 kids. I think a healthy balance for my husband and I are sharing an account and having our own accounts too. I came into our marriage with pending student debt that I have taken upon myself to pay it off and not have my husband do it. This works for us. I always agree about the “taming” of the tongue.
This video is right on time 🥺🤎 celebrating 6 years of marriage with my husband in a couple of weeks. Marriage is so beautiful and sacred, so much growth has occurred in the last almost 6 years. God has even more work to do and I cannot wait to see what is to come. Congratulations you two!
I love this! You guys are such a great example. ❤ I just want to give a different perspective…. A lot of issues have to do with personality more than gender. When we first got married, I was the passive introvert and my husband was the one who “nagged” for lack of a better word… nagging really means having a critical spirit (lack of grace and overbearing). It also has a lot to do with how people were raised which causes them to be more overbearing or passive. Also want to mention that men need respect AND love… and women need respect AND love. We both NEED both. The feeling of being disrespected as a women is the worst thing ever. I would much rather chose respect over love. Anyway, everyone’s specific circumstances are different, but all of the biblical principles still apply! I always love your content 😊
The way the Lord has demonstrated through your marriage how to love as well as you can, is beautiful. It makes my heart happy to hear the biblical advice and well explained tips on how He’s worked on you together. God continue blessing your marriage and further encourage His Kingdom.
Ahh Milena!! I love this so much and I love how you’re sharing your life with us when you don’t have to! Thank you for always being so vulnerable and authentic. Your videos are always so fun to watch and so encouraging when you do sit down videos! Ilysm and I hope you’re having an amazing day 💕💕
Thank you for affirming the importance of a stay-at-home mom. Up until my husband and I got pregnant, I never wanted to be a sahm; I believed that because I got my college degree, I should be using it. And now that I am a mom, I haven’t been working because God has given me a strong desire to be the one who raises our daughter. But now we’re in the same place y’all were talking about earlier of living paycheck to paycheck. It’s been hard to not let the enemy make me feel guilty for not being a financial contributor to our family. Thank you for the encouragement. ❤️
Got married 6 years ago at 21 and just had our first child. I never wanted kids but now that I have one I wish I could tell my younger self to not be so selfish. Becoming parents has brought us closer together and has made us fall in love in a way we wouldve never known before
I love you guys as a couple but omg my respect which was already high as is for the both of you individually and as a couple just shot up by like 1000!!! Love you guys!!!
Got married at 19. Just celebrated two years of marriage. My advice as somebody who hasn’t been married super long is to prioritize each other always, to ask for what you need/want and compromise when you need to, listen before you speak, have LOTS of sex, and pray with your spouse often.
This video was so life giving for me. It really made me think about how I play my part in my marriage. Thank you and I can’t wait to share this video. ❤
Got married at 19 and 22 and I personally would have gotten married way sooner and we have joint bank accounts and we share everything and thanks to God for keeping us together, it will be 10 years next year and we are expecting our second child this year ❤
Love your perspective on this! My husband and I got married really young he was 20 I was 21 and we are at 2 and a half years now and I haven’t once regretted getting married so young. Due to family situations we’ve had a pretty rough time but instead of turning against one another we had to be very intentional about turning to one another and leaning on God more than anything. I have always been very intentional in watching what I say because I don’t want to damage my husband with my words for the rest of our lives! 🤍 but anyway… love you milena and you as a mother is so inspiring… I’m becoming a mother in the end of September and I am so excited to begin this journey with all your tips and tricks 😅🫶🤰🏻
As a divorced single mom, this video makes me sad and ashamed of myself. I wanted nothing more than a family for my children. I wanted what you have so so badly. But my husband wasn’t trustworthy and I did what I had to do to keep my kids safe. 😕
Milena, I feel your husband has evolved (in the best way) . I am speechless. I don't know how to thank you for speaking out about how great the fruit can be that can come out of marriage; and how the devil is trying to attack that in every way he can, because he knows how much it's linked to Gods Power and Love (his great ways). What you just said is exactly what I needed to hear, thank you very much. Your Gods tool, and you can't imagine what it means to me, and probably to many other people of God.
On the roommate topic: I literally had to remind my husband that he could put his stuff where my stuff was throughout our apartment. We had both been through several college roommates so it was just very foreign to him. Like, he kept lighter fluid on his night stand because that's where he had kept it to keep it out of his roomates' way 😂 I had to go put it in a closet.
Married when we were 22, been married 16 years now. My best piece of advice would be, pray a lot & don't worry too much about what is going on in those first few years where you're just figuring it all out. Things have a way of mellowing out & falling into place. Our biggest problems surrounded his parents being too involved in our lives... But they needed time to figure out how to back off out of their baby boys life. I wish I could've known then, that it would gradually work itself out & that I didn't need to stress about it.
Team work makes the dream work…You need a team mate, Best Friend, not an opponent…I’m 15 years in my marriage Marriage isn’t 50/50…that is divorce, when you are dividing everything in half…Your goal should be to bring 100 to the your partner…but some days you may only have 20 to give and that is when you have to meet your partner where they are and make up the difference….You have to agree to say we are both not at 100 and we aren’t going to get angry with each other, we are going to use kindness with each others…You address it before you know you could hurt each other….🙌🏼🙏🏼🙌🏼🙏🏼🙌🏼♥️
We got married almost 2 years ago (will be two this October) me 26 he 37. and we are going through a economic difficult season.. and i think we are just learning to be gracefull with eachother, not fight because of the lack of money or savings.. trying to enjoy the little moments.. and praying to the Lord that when he wants to, we will have a better income.. and our marriage will grow to another level.. i think god is teaching us to go through the hard times together to make our marriage solid as a rock. ❤ I really look up to you Milena, and love your content. Its not easy to see content like this in the times we're living.
Loved this I’d love more videos like this to help marriages! I feel like people don’t talk about what it’s like getting married young and growing up together!
Very helpful video. I’m getting married in 10 months. We’re both 23 and straight out of uni. Been together since 2017. Sometimes want to freak out. But thank you for this. Blessings to you guys!
Biggest piece of advice stems back to our premarital counseling and it’s : always try and have an open hand instead of a closed fist. 8 years later it’s still something that we talk about often, or reference in different aspects of our marriage/parenting etc. to lead with an open hand (soft, gentle, life giving, patient) vs a closed fist (hard, short fuse, self minded).
Could you do a video talking about toxic marriage? How could we difference between a mediocre marriage and an abusive marriage that you have to go away as fast as possible?
marriage is something i look forward to, but it’s so intimidating to me when i listen to them sometimes because i always feel like i may not live up to the expectation of God. what if i’m not a good enough wife or mother ? there’s so much depth to a marriage and it seems so frightening
Absolutely amazing video. This was for sure answered prayer for me. You guys talked about everything that I'm going through right now and needed clarity on. Thank you ❤ God bless
Hi! My husband and I have been married 5 years. It was what you would call a shotgun wedding. I definitely resented the fact I didn't have a fairytale wedding and that it was done all because I got pregnant. We thought it was the right thing to do at the time. Then we went through a very rough season. With having a baby, we didn't get much of that honeymooners season. We argued a lot. I definitely held onto a lot of bitterness. I compared our lives to others. Now, 2, almost 3, kids in, I wouldn't change the fact we got married in a rush. I'm so thankful we did. We glorified God in sanctifying our relationship. We have grown so much as a couple. We've learned to communicate with eachother. I think the biggest help was praying for each other and praying with eachother and as a family. Allowing God into our intimate moments. I think if I could change one thing it would be that I never mourned my fairytale wedding, but looked at the blessing we received in our marriage, eachother. Blessings to everyone and your family and your relationships!
Yes! Agreed, if a couple gets married they should share a bank account. To this day I don't know a single marriage that functions well that has separate bank accounts.
My husband and I got married at 18 and 19 a week before I graduated high school. Just celebrated 5 years of marriage! I tell my husband all the time we should’ve eloped as soon as I turned 18 😂 if my family had it their way we’d be getting married this year lol but then we wouldn’t have our daughter and our 2nd baby on the way ❤
I get the idea of being one and sharing one bank account. BUT it can also be really dangerous: imagine you're in an abusive relationship and you have no financial means to get out of there, so you have to stay! it can be really dangerous
I love you guys but the love Delilah has for Jordan is probably the greatest love I've ever seen... JUST LOOK AT THE WAY SHE LISTENS TO HIM SPEAK. My heart is so full.
Hi Milena
i’ve been married almost 14 yrs (also got married young at 22 yrs old :)
the advices i can give
- have sex often (the more you do it, the better you get at it and the more you will desire your spouse) nothing destroys more a marriage than lack of intimacy
- do you want to be happily married or do you want to be right? (let go of petty arguments)
- remember that you are on the same team
- learn to fight/argue in a healthy way
- children are a result of your love; dont let them become the core of your marriage - your healthy relationship is the core of your family
****i want to add one more : learn each other’s love language (gary chapman’s - the 5 love languages book should be read by every newlywed IMO)
Thank you I just got married I’ll take this advice ☺️🙏🏻❤️
These are beautiful words of wisdom, thank you for sharing with us ❤
Thank you for your comment!! Really well put.
TLDR: quality sex is more important than the quantity of sex
Great thoughts! I would just add that instead of frequent sex, make sure to have good sex. Really focus on pleasuring your partner. You can have sex everyday, but if it isn’t very mutually pleasurable/enjoyable, then the intimacy will be lost:/ And of course, if the sex is actually good and pleasurable, you will desire your partner more (so it may end up becoming more frequent!).
@@Encouragement_for_youcongratulations! May the Lord bless your union ❤🙏🏻
My best marriage advice is James 1:19, "be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry". This applies to more than just marriage, but it was something that really helped me the first year of marriage adjusting to living together.
👏👏👏👏👋👋
When Jordan said something like “Don’t let being under the same roof, sleeping together, always being together be an excuse to not serve them” the conviction hit hard with that one!!
I was blessed by this video!! Thank y’all!! 💛💛
“Men want to be respected and women want to be loved” took me a LONG time to learn this. So good
Very true.. that is also what the Bible talks about.
Both men and women want to be loved and respected …
Everyone deserves respect and love, irrespective of their gender. If you don't mind being disrespected, there's something wrong.
@@mimad4923I agree with you, I want to be loved and respected not just loved and the Bible also instructs husbands to respect their wives too in some translations which some people don’t seem to know in the church.
Its both
Jordan mentioned putting fences over fences to guard your marriage from infidelity. I would love to learn more about what that looks like for you both. if you do a podcast or video on it I would love to listen to it
I second this notion!
Milena could you do a whole series on preparing for marriage now being a married women? I would appreciate it so much ❤
me too!!!
Yeass
YES PLEASE DO THIS!!! Especially on taming the tongue. Like you were talking about
Wooooww this would be so good!!
YESSSS!!!
you two seem like you’re in a much healthier place in your marriage & you both just seem so in love… like in the very beginning! 🥹 love you guys and your growth.
My husband and I got married at 20 and 21. If I could change one thing… I wish we would’ve gotten married younger. Now we are almost 20 years in! Growing old with your spouse is a beautiful thing.
Wow congratulations to you both!! growing old together is indeed so so beautiful 🥺
So much truth in this! Me and my husband got married when I was 19 and he was 20, so many people doubted us because we were young but we listened to God and He made a way! We will be celebrating 4 years of marriage this august and it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. We already have so many testimonies of Gods faithfulness and there is more to come! Love you guys, thank you for your honesty and encouragement ❤
Married at 18 and 19 now married for 20 years with a 19 and 16 year old daughters. 100% would get married at that age again!! I would say the hardest part was our parents butting in! All our arguments were surrounded by our parents and not knowing how to set boundaries with them.
I’m not Christian, I definetely believe in God and honestly I love your content since I was pregnant with my baby girl back in 2020 and I love this union you guys have, your values, your team work even far from the religious takes 🙏🏻 much respect
Who is God to you?
Jesus is the way and the Truth and he loves you. He knew you before you were in your mothers womb. You are precious and created with such beautiful purpose. I hope and pray that you know this Martina ❤️
Jesus is the Most High God
Married at 18/19 and this year we celebrate 5 years. I wish I knew how much family boundaries were needed at that age. We also went through so many trails within our first 3 years of marriage between my dad and step mom dying within two months of each other in 2021. I wish that when we got married we had a realistic view point in knowing that things will happen and challenge us, but that through the fire it strengthens. Thankful to be growing up together and creating the memories through the years. High school graduation, college, pets, first home. It’s such a journey.
How did you get through family boundaries? My husband and I married in our late twenties but once we did we had two very close family members trying to parent us and judged every decision we made, although we were established and able to make those decisions. We still don’t have a relationship with them 3 years later but we would like to. We tried to communicate our issues with them and it went horribly.
I’m not married but desire to be in the future and this video is so good! God’s given you guys such an anointing and I just want to encourage you both that I believe you are stewarding well what the Father has given to you. Thank you for being obedient to the call of the LORD!
As someone getting married soon the Lord definitely put this video in my life for a reason. Thank you for spreading this knowledge
The two major pieces of advice I would give newlyweds is this: work mostly on your walk with Jesus and always keep that the number one priority because HE is the One who is going to give you the type of insight that no one else can for your specific marriage. This can literally make or break your marriage.
Secondly, you WILL make mistakes because every couple does, so try not to beat yourselves up about it or live in regret because sometimes you just don’t know any better and you’re just trying to do the best you can.
Also, thank you guys for sharing insight on what has helped you personally.
Love the honesty you both have. It makes us feel so much closer to you
Thank you for sharing! I hope it reaches so many who can learn from this video.
I've been married for 6 years and we were 30 and 31 so, not as young BUT completely agree on the bank account thing!!! Absolutely makes you like roomates when you have seperate accounts and its so helpful for building towards our goals as a couple. And the encouragement to the stay at home moms is sooo important. That part was so spot on and I wish every mom could hear that and feel the value they bring to the family. Even though I am not one, I have friends who are so I love that.
I mean having the shared account helps with building goals lol
My husband and I married when I was 16. I know that’s insane for most people lol. But we just celebrated 10 years last month and there is definitely a difference in who we are then and now. What really matters is allowing the Lord to come into your marriage and guide the two of you in it.
I got married at 18 years old and we just celebrated 5 years with our sweet baby boy! Your channel has been so beneficial to me in many ways with your love of Jesus and advice on being a wife and a mother.
JUST WANTED TO SAY MILENA IS SOOOOO GORGEOUS WOW! The type of beauty one doesn't get used to. ❤
This September will be our seven year marriage anniversary and one thing I would tell young couples is to let go of any prejudice you had regarding the home life and childhood you grew up with. This is something I am still working on, but I think in the past couple years we’ve made big improvements, but I would say a lot of the arguments I had with my husband stemmed from negative associations I had with the dynamic between my parents and trying to undo things. My parents did via my husband even though my husband is a totally different person and he is nothing like my father and hasn’t shown traits similar to my father, but I was just so adamant not to become my mother that I put all my childhood negativity on my husband’s shoulders, and that wasn’t fair to him so that’s some thing I would say especially if you grew up in not so perfect Christian household.
This is solid advice. I’m working on this now. I have to let go of the fear of divorce and live for a marriage rather than living to avoid divorce.
You guys are so blessed to have found each other. It is great that you two are so connected and on the same page. I love that you are helping other couples.
Thank-you for being such a blessing.
I regret not getting married sooner, dated for 7 years been married for 5 years. We knew we wanted to get married within the first year but waited until we were more ‘stable’. I can report that we are still not as ‘stable’ according to worldly standards. But by the grace of Gods we are happily married.
My husband and I have known each other since we were 10 and 11 years old. We've been married for 7 years, and we have a total of 3 children. We are a minimalist family, living within our means. We started taking the minimalist journey about 2 years ago. It's honesty a mind switch. Our society tells us we need more, but we actually don't.
Married for almost 13 years now and got married when I was 20. Definitely agree with so much, you all said! And yes, for the same bank account. We did that from the start.
Also prayed a lot during our courtship and for God to guide us.
The thing we wanted before we got married was to buy our first home (which we did together). I didn't want to live with mom and in-laws. Also, I finished college, and we had a simple but great Portuguese/ Brazilian wedding with close family and friends. Almost 13 years later and happily married with 3 kids, mortgage and debt free, and we currently live off grid. I love that I got married young too! Definitely feel that God has been the center from the start and will be till the end ❤
SLEEP! SLEEP IS SO HARD WHEN YOU FIRST GET MARRIED! We didn't live together and we were both virgins so my husband was the first man in my bed and it is VERY different than having your best girl friend over for a sleepover. We also have the exact opposite things we need to sleep. Warm vs cold. White noise vs silence. Squishy vs hard bed. Etc. It was a lot to get used to. My advice is to have a real night time routine to get yourself ready for sleep. No blue light, drinking sleepy time tea, drink Calm sleep mix (avoid melatonin because it can give you scary dreams which is NOT what you need), read in bed or talk to settle down, etc. We both had very dark circles under our eyes for the first few months of marriage but we figured it out eventually. Just a heads up! 😴
I’m getting married in 97 days to the boy, now man I’ve been with for 6 years as high school sweethearts now 22! This came right on time and I needed to hear these things! Thank you, Mil for sharing this! And thank the LORD for sending this !❤
Yesss much needed content! Just got engaged recently and we’re a young Christian couple! 21 and 25! Thanks you guys❤️
It always makes me so happy to hear about couples who have been married young/younger! My husband and I got married when we were 20, had been dating since we were 13 (in the 7th grade), and we went through a lot with our families. It was such a crazy season of life, so when the wedding day finally came it was like we reached the finish line of dating and could look forward to the rest of our lives together, learning and growing.
Thank you so much for your videos and for coming to such a public space to be so vulnerable and honest!
My husband and I have been married for a year now and the past 6 months it’s really been on my heart that I don’t want to be a nagging wife and it definitely is difficult but I can tell things have been better between us, especially letting it go and not reacting and holding resentment!!! Love watching and learning from you two!
This video was such perfect timing! Getting married in a few months and we’re 21 & 23, together for 4 years. Thanks for the honesty and advice☺️
How exciting!! prayers for you in this season of engagement 🤎
Perfect timing video as I'm about to get married in a couple of months ( I'm 21 he's 23) so this video just hit the spot! I just love that you guys are looking out for the younger generation, may God bless your beautiful family and the work you guys are doing ❤
My husband and I have learned to be invested in small things that bring us joy together. For us that's shopping (like really getting invested in finding the best deal and the thing that looks best on my cute husband hehe), getting ready for church, finding a good lunch spot, or a great place for a nice evening walk. We've found that putting energy into those moments makes our marriage feel so joyful and fulfilling. Like we are with our best friend. and that's such a blessing.
I graduated from a Christian high school. The majority of those who have been married are now divorced….I’m 24. There is something about age and wisdom when it comes to marriage
@Milena, I just want to say how much I appreciate what you and your family are doing. I remember when I was looking for Christian people to follow on RUclips, your channel came up and I'm glad that I was able to subscribe. I have never been married, but I still enjoy listening to your thoughts/feelings on different issues. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for this! Been married year and a half and with an 11 month old. I used to have a good job, but been an adjustment being a stay at home mom and being ok with no longer having my own income. Been watching the both of you since before your first arrived! Thank you for being so encouraging and keeping me thinking about how to live my faith in married life.☺️
This is so good. If I were to give any advice to a young couple it would be to guard your marriage. Be cautious about who you vent to or go to for advice. My husband and I only speak to people that we know the other would feel comfortable with us venting to. We don’t complain to our parents or siblings. We have trusted friends (that have been married longer than us) whom we feel safe knowing even the no so flattering parts of us. Additionally we don’t confide in people of the opposite sex. We don’t want to leave an open door for any opportunity for emotion infidelity or physical for that matter.
In short, guess your marriage like you guard your heart. ❤
Thanks for talking about these things. I appreciate you two!
19 & 20 ❤ grateful we learned all this and more in only our first two years of marriage but it was definitely a roller coaster. My biggest advice would be setting very firm boundaries with family and friends; 99% of our arguments ended being outside sources.
I have been married for 10 years. I think it's very cool to hear the husband's perspective of marriage and what do I should do or be like. I've been following you for the years and I think it is very noticeable and the changes that you and Jordan has been throughout the years. Even the way you express yourself and I think is Honorable I think you are doing amazing God bless you both and your little ones you are a little ones.
I got married when I was 18. We have been married for 21 years. Making your spouse priority is so important. Don't correct your husband in public. It really doesn't matter if it was 5 or 3 of something. Whenever you get into a disagreement turn to God by opening his word and praying.This is how God can soften your heart. Everytime I do God tells me what I know is true but my flesh doesn't want to be true. Don't say negative things about your spouse. Lift him up. Don't ever stop flirting with eachother and having fun together. Do things together. I go fishing with my husband and will work on something else while he fishes.
Love this! I was 19 and my husband was 20 when we got married. Now we are A little over three years in. It has been such a blessing, watching the Lord work in our lives.
My husband and I were the same ages when we got married. We are now 10 1/2 years and 4 kids in and we’ve grown so much! Keep pushing on friends 🤎
Mazel tov on 6 years of marriage! Thanking God for you!
Thanks for sharing your advice for newlyweds! My husband and I have been married just over a year, and we were 22 and 23 when we got married, right after we both graduated from college. I loved the advice that Jordan gave for wives to study their husbands. In our first year of marriage, my husband and I hit some rough spots with how to communicate and understand one another. However, I feel that as of lately I’ve learned when is a good time to talk to him and share my heart with him, and I’ve also started learning some more about his interests. As you said, our spouses are always changing, so I pray that with God’s help I’ll continue to learn about my husband as he changes throughout our marriage. Gods blessings to you and your family! 🤍
My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years and it can not be more true about luring about one another! We have been together since I was 14 and he was 17. (We are 23 and 26 now) to say the least we have changed a lot since then is a understatement.
I would say though the most important thing for the marriage is to stay in the world of God pray together!
I have literally binge watched your videos and listened to almost all your podcast episodes in the past 2 months 🤍 thank you for creating meaningful and inspiring online content 😍 so inspire me so so much and I look up to you as to my big sister I never had! Be blessed in everything 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Yep got married at 19&20 and loved it! Now we had our first baby at 21❤️
Milena you mentioned there’s no scripture that directly says that a couple should have a joint bank account but I feel like this verse supports that idea too!
“‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.”
Mark 10:7-8 NIV
One flesh works united so having separate bank accounts in my eyes goes against that idea. It gives way for temptation and doesn’t allow you to keep your partner accountable 💛
Your dog is so relaxed hearing you both speak, her little eyes just close. So cute!
I 100% agree with the bank accounts! My sister & her husband have had separate bank accounts and have been extremely close to divorce more than once. He would withhold money from her etc… the lack of unity is a HUGE problem
I have 1 Corinthians wrote on my board for my Verse of the Week and have truly felt like God is trying to lead me to a season to learn what calls a woman to be to her home. I love your videos and for God to speak through you today to me individually through your video 🥹 Never stop showing God flavors over you!
My mom nagged my father so much it hurt my heart as a kid, so even my husband will say we never nag eachother, I saw so much of what it does to a person.
Me too 😞
This is great! I do want to say that you don’t necessarily need one bank account as long as you are treating finances as one. I’m not sure how this works in America but in my country you can’t have your own credit score via a shared account, there is always a primary holder. So basically, we’ve got 2 accounts but budget and spend money as if it’s completely pooled.
We wanted to each have a credit score because if something were to happen to either of us, we want the other person to have a credit score against their name. 😊
I agree with you! My husband and I have been together for 12 years and have always had separate accounts. It’s not about the separate accounts, it’s about the communication of finance. Even in their examples the area that lacks is how a couple is communicating about money. People can share a bank account and still claim “this is my portion of the money because I brought in this much.”
Really insightful! We have been married for 5 years and have 2 kids.
I think a healthy balance for my husband and I are sharing an account and having our own accounts too. I came into our marriage with pending student debt that I have taken upon myself to pay it off and not have my husband do it. This works for us.
I always agree about the “taming” of the tongue.
This video is right on time 🥺🤎 celebrating 6 years of marriage with my husband in a couple of weeks. Marriage is so beautiful and sacred, so much growth has occurred in the last almost 6 years. God has even more work to do and I cannot wait to see what is to come. Congratulations you two!
Amen sister 🤎 happy early anniversary!!
I love this! You guys are such a great example. ❤
I just want to give a different perspective…. A lot of issues have to do with personality more than gender. When we first got married, I was the passive introvert and my husband was the one who “nagged” for lack of a better word… nagging really means having a critical spirit (lack of grace and overbearing). It also has a lot to do with how people were raised which causes them to be more overbearing or passive.
Also want to mention that men need respect AND love… and women need respect AND love. We both NEED both. The feeling of being disrespected as a women is the worst thing ever. I would much rather chose respect over love.
Anyway, everyone’s specific circumstances are different, but all of the biblical principles still apply! I always love your content 😊
YESSSSS on one bank account for married couples! I love what you said to support that Milena!
The way the Lord has demonstrated through your marriage how to love as well as you can, is beautiful. It makes my heart happy to hear the biblical advice and well explained tips on how He’s worked on you together. God continue blessing your marriage and further encourage His Kingdom.
I am getting married soon and this is such a great video for advice and biblical wisdom on how to be a great godly spouse! Thank you!!
Ahh Milena!! I love this so much and I love how you’re sharing your life with us when you don’t have to! Thank you for always being so vulnerable and authentic. Your videos are always so fun to watch and so encouraging when you do sit down videos! Ilysm and I hope you’re having an amazing day 💕💕
Thank you for affirming the importance of a stay-at-home mom. Up until my husband and I got pregnant, I never wanted to be a sahm; I believed that because I got my college degree, I should be using it. And now that I am a mom, I haven’t been working because God has given me a strong desire to be the one who raises our daughter. But now we’re in the same place y’all were talking about earlier of living paycheck to paycheck. It’s been hard to not let the enemy make me feel guilty for not being a financial contributor to our family. Thank you for the encouragement. ❤️
everything said in this video >>
my fiancé and i are 20 and 22… everything in this video is so valuable!
Got married 6 years ago at 21 and just had our first child. I never wanted kids but now that I have one I wish I could tell my younger self to not be so selfish. Becoming parents has brought us closer together and has made us fall in love in a way we wouldve never known before
I love you guys as a couple but omg my respect which was already high as is for the both of you individually and as a couple just shot up by like 1000!!! Love you guys!!!
Yes boundaries are huge especially when getting married young&living with in-laws. My marriage took a hit in the earlier years.
This channel is such a breathe of fresh air. The way you guys are such teachers and honest and raw is much needed in the world💜
Got married at 19. Just celebrated two years of marriage. My advice as somebody who hasn’t been married super long is to prioritize each other always, to ask for what you need/want and compromise when you need to, listen before you speak, have LOTS of sex, and pray with your spouse often.
I can't wait to do all of that with my future wife!
Not getting married but this was really convicting and encouraging for me!! Thank you so much for sharing :)
This video was so life giving for me. It really made me think about how I play my part in my marriage. Thank you and I can’t wait to share this video. ❤
Got married at 19 and 22 and I personally would have gotten married way sooner and we have joint bank accounts and we share everything and thanks to God for keeping us together, it will be 10 years next year and we are expecting our second child this year ❤
Love your perspective on this! My husband and I got married really young he was 20 I was 21 and we are at 2 and a half years now and I haven’t once regretted getting married so young. Due to family situations we’ve had a pretty rough time but instead of turning against one another we had to be very intentional about turning to one another and leaning on God more than anything. I have always been very intentional in watching what I say because I don’t want to damage my husband with my words for the rest of our lives! 🤍 but anyway… love you milena and you as a mother is so inspiring… I’m becoming a mother in the end of September and I am so excited to begin this journey with all your tips and tricks 😅🫶🤰🏻
Thank you for speaking truth in love! I can’t imagine how tough it can be in this day and age, so THANK YOU!!! Beautiful message 💗
Praying my husband is a strong leader for our home and builds his relationship with God. It took a big hit when his grandmother passed
Same here. His grandmother died too& also he was disappointed by certain things in life.
I will keep your situation in prayer as well.
Mannn…. Just WOWWWW!!! I felt the Lord was speaking to me!!!! ❤❤❤ Thank you !!!!
As a divorced single mom, this video makes me sad and ashamed of myself. I wanted nothing more than a family for my children. I wanted what you have so so badly. But my husband wasn’t trustworthy and I did what I had to do to keep my kids safe. 😕
Glad you’re safe now, it’s scary to be with a man who is scary
You have nothing to be ashamed of. You took care of your children and kept them safe.
Milena, I feel your husband has evolved (in the best way) .
I am speechless. I don't know how to thank you for speaking out about how great the fruit can be that can come out of marriage;
and how the devil is trying to attack that in every way he can, because he knows how much it's linked to Gods Power and Love (his great ways).
What you just said is exactly what I needed to hear, thank you very much. Your Gods tool, and you can't imagine what it means to me, and probably to many other people of God.
On the roommate topic: I literally had to remind my husband that he could put his stuff where my stuff was throughout our apartment. We had both been through several college roommates so it was just very foreign to him. Like, he kept lighter fluid on his night stand because that's where he had kept it to keep it out of his roomates' way 😂 I had to go put it in a closet.
That's adorable lol!
Married when we were 22, been married 16 years now. My best piece of advice would be, pray a lot & don't worry too much about what is going on in those first few years where you're just figuring it all out. Things have a way of mellowing out & falling into place. Our biggest problems surrounded his parents being too involved in our lives... But they needed time to figure out how to back off out of their baby boys life. I wish I could've known then, that it would gradually work itself out & that I didn't need to stress about it.
Team work makes the dream work…You need a team mate, Best Friend, not an opponent…I’m 15 years in my marriage
Marriage isn’t 50/50…that is divorce, when you are dividing everything in half…Your goal should be to bring 100 to the your partner…but some days you may only have 20 to give and that is when you have to meet your partner where they are and make up the difference….You have to agree to say we are both not at 100 and we aren’t going to get angry with each other, we are going to use kindness with each others…You address it before you know you could hurt each other….🙌🏼🙏🏼🙌🏼🙏🏼🙌🏼♥️
We got married almost 2 years ago (will be two this October) me 26 he 37. and we are going through a economic difficult season.. and i think we are just learning to be gracefull with eachother, not fight because of the lack of money or savings.. trying to enjoy the little moments.. and praying to the Lord that when he wants to, we will have a better income.. and our marriage will grow to another level.. i think god is teaching us to go through the hard times together to make our marriage solid as a rock. ❤ I really look up to you Milena, and love your content. Its not easy to see content like this in the times we're living.
Loved this I’d love more videos like this to help marriages! I feel like people don’t talk about what it’s like getting married young and growing up together!
Very helpful video. I’m getting married in 10 months. We’re both 23 and straight out of uni. Been together since 2017. Sometimes want to freak out. But thank you for this. Blessings to you guys!
Biggest piece of advice stems back to our premarital counseling and it’s : always try and have an open hand instead of a closed fist. 8 years later it’s still something that we talk about often, or reference in different aspects of our marriage/parenting etc. to lead with an open hand (soft, gentle, life giving, patient) vs a closed fist (hard, short fuse, self minded).
I really love the videos you make these days... Its definitely Spirit-led!
Could you do a video talking about toxic marriage? How could we difference between a mediocre marriage and an abusive marriage that you have to go away as fast as possible?
My husband and I got married at 22 and 24. Now fast forward two years we are expecting are first in 4.5 months. ❤
marriage is something i look forward to, but it’s so intimidating to me when i listen to them sometimes because i always feel like i may not live up to the expectation of God. what if i’m not a good enough wife or mother ? there’s so much depth to a marriage and it seems so frightening
Me and my fiancé have been talking about everything we learned through watching this video! Love this kind of content!!!
Absolutely amazing video. This was for sure answered prayer for me. You guys talked about everything that I'm going through right now and needed clarity on. Thank you ❤ God bless
a healthy marriage is a healthy church. A healthy church is a healthy body of Christ.
The enemy hates that
This is helpful! Getting married in September. Please do more of these.
I listen to this while cleaning up the house. So when I glanced over at the screen 19:34 and thought your dress moving was a ghost I freaked out! 😂😂😂
Hi! My husband and I have been married 5 years. It was what you would call a shotgun wedding. I definitely resented the fact I didn't have a fairytale wedding and that it was done all because I got pregnant. We thought it was the right thing to do at the time. Then we went through a very rough season. With having a baby, we didn't get much of that honeymooners season. We argued a lot. I definitely held onto a lot of bitterness. I compared our lives to others. Now, 2, almost 3, kids in, I wouldn't change the fact we got married in a rush. I'm so thankful we did. We glorified God in sanctifying our relationship. We have grown so much as a couple. We've learned to communicate with eachother. I think the biggest help was praying for each other and praying with eachother and as a family. Allowing God into our intimate moments. I think if I could change one thing it would be that I never mourned my fairytale wedding, but looked at the blessing we received in our marriage, eachother.
Blessings to everyone and your family and your relationships!
Yes! Agreed, if a couple gets married they should share a bank account. To this day I don't know a single marriage that functions well that has separate bank accounts.
Honestly, one of the best videos I’ve come across recently! I’m a newly wed and everything you said speaks to me directly.❤ thank you
My husband and I got married at 18 and 19 a week before I graduated high school. Just celebrated 5 years of marriage! I tell my husband all the time we should’ve eloped as soon as I turned 18 😂 if my family had it their way we’d be getting married this year lol but then we wouldn’t have our daughter and our 2nd baby on the way ❤
I get the idea of being one and sharing one bank account. BUT it can also be really dangerous: imagine you're in an abusive relationship and you have no financial means to get out of there, so you have to stay! it can be really dangerous
Love this and love you guys for this encouragement! My husband and I are one year in, and you’ve been such a blessing to us 🫶🏼
I love you guys but the love Delilah has for Jordan is probably the greatest love I've ever seen... JUST LOOK AT THE WAY SHE LISTENS TO HIM SPEAK. My heart is so full.
Love the vid but okay I am CRACKING up when that dress started moving.
I'm 20 and so is my fiancé, we're getting married in 3 months!! I am looking forward to seeing how we grow throughout the coming years of marriage 😆😍