This interview was THE BEST…I’ve watched dozens of videos of Chris Voss and this one in particular was absolutely the best…I’ve only watched 20 minutes of it but I’m in for all 73!!
If you don’t watch any of Mr. Voss’s videos & The BSG in general and say in awe and amazement, “This is f****ng GOLD!” , who are you? I’ve never really said those words when I come across certain knowledge ... I’m a psych/neuro woman and that phrase has came out ever recent video. Eye feel at home here with different brain work.
I can't believe he did it to me again... Chris did it again, like he always does! He has his own book. I read it. I watched a lot of his video talks. And pretty much every time he gives an interview... he drops the name of another book that helps us learn how to communicate better. I hate it when he does that. I have a list of 30 books to read because of him! I'm not a reader. But I feel compelled to read his book and all the books he recommends because I know how bad I am with communicating and I can become a bit better reading books every day. And it really is helping. But this process is so darned slow!
Every time Chris Voss makes a video from his desk I'm always trying to zoom in on the books behind him 😆, you say you have a list going of his recommendable books 📚, would you be opposed to posting the list you have here in a reply comment?
@@chuckMvideos Let's work on this list together. I suggested he dropped the name of a book and author in this current video. Name that, to get us started. I'd much rather have this a collaborative effort than I just post my own list. And the list we compile can lead us in a lot of different directions, depending on our own interests. I read books on my breaks at work. I usually consume my lunch at first break, then at lunch break and last break I read. One of my coworkers asked me to lend her a library book I was reading. I said, go to the library and get it yourself. She said she moved across the border and no longer has access to it (but she does have access to a library in her new neighbourhood). She seems hung up on getting books from me, she says, you have a lot of books at home that you bought, right? Maybe I can borrow some of these from you? So I broke down and she's borrowing the fourth book from the Doug Library. The current one is Relentless, by Tim Grover. She's reading it for the third time, re-reading it to grasp more of the contents. At one point she said, why does he talk about a cleaner? I liked that question. Her second book was one I found on the street, in front of someone's house. To me, it's "the best book ever" because I honestly feel we are forgetting how to care about each other and a lot of our actions wind up as "thoughts and prayers" instead of actually helping each other. Robert Myers, Get Your Loved One Sober I use this book to inspire me how I can lead, in my community, at work, with friends and neighbours, etc. That goes way beyond dealing with alcohol and drugs in the lives of those close to us. I still have a lot to learn about this but this book talks on that subject. So please find and share the book/author Chris name-dropped in this video to get us started.
Time stamps, copy and paste these into the description. Like this comment to keep it at the top of the comments 👍 00:00 Start 00:03 Lewis Howes interview, taking criticism 24:14 Chris Voss Fireside Chat on how Situation drives Strategy and the right use of Have you given up on... 31:27 Chris Voss at VTS Accelerate, the Jack Welch story, using Is it a ridiculous idea... using a calibrated No to get a Yes. 34:40 Derek Gaunt webnair, using Labeling and Mislabeling to get more intel from your counterpart, corrected with truth 38:01 Chris Voss, summarizing a situation to get a That's Right out of counterpart, the importance of leaving / ending a negotiation with the other side feeling respected. 43:54 Chris Voss Using No oriented questions to get the Yes 43:55 Is now a bad time to talk? 47:15 Is it a ridiculous idea...? 47:27 Are you against...? 48:36 Have you given up on...? Plus getting the Thats Right out of them. Sound like I've left something out...? 50:49 Letting out "No" a little at a time. How am I supposed to do that? ‼Important......👇👇👇‼ 53:21 How to subscribe to The Edge, The Black Swan newsletter, TWO ways to do it. (IF THE ONLY ACTION YOU TAKE AFTER WATCHING THIS VIDEO IS SIGNING UP FOR THE NEWSLETTER, THEN YOU'VE ALREADY BECOME A MORE INFORMED NEGOTIATOR. DO IT!! FUTURE YOU WILL THANK YOU) 54:47 On No a little at a time, Your offer is very generous I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me... 57:00 It sound like you have a place you want to start...? 58:20 What makes you ask? The ? behind the ? 1:00:19 It seems like you have a good reason for asking? Two inflections, ask then wait in silence. 1:01:06 It seems like you have a reason for not doing....? 1:02:00 Derek Gaunt webnair, The 2 functions of Tactical Empathy 1:05:53 Davi Johnson and Sandy Hein on using Labels and Mirrors on negotiating promotions, dealing with disrespect.
Also edit the title of the video by changing Negotiation to Negotiator or change it to ' Better negotiation in Any situation. Use these strategies to become better. ' Make it into 2 sentences. How do I add timestamps to your RUclips videos automatically? Sign in to RUclips Studio, go to Content, and choose a video. In the description, add a list of timestamps and titles starting with 00:00. To add automatic timestamps, select Show more > Allow automatic chapters.
Extremily useful examples! Thank you. Would it be difficult for you to explain for a simpleton like me: what do you mean by "eight mayowa" (spelling might be completely wrong, sorry)?
This thing about getting practice by asking for FREE UPGRADES, EMPLOYEE DISCOUNTS, I can see the value in getting our practice in. But it works against my sense of values of wanting to be honest, just, and (I know this is the F word) fair. So I have a built in aversion to using this and using it every time. I heard of someone buying from Mennonite farmers. What they were offering was a price about ten percent of the current market value in a grocery store. It was an absolute bargain. But when this guy asked the farmer to lower his price, he no longer wanted to sell to him, at any price, because he had an aversion to bargaining. I'm somewhere in between. I want to respect a price that works for me, I want to walk away if the price is too high, I want to ask them to lower their price if I really need what they are selling but I also need a lower price. This could be one of the reasons I don't play poker. I don't want to gamble "for moral reasons" because I don't want to risk losing money, I would not know how to continue my relationship with a friend when I won money the night before that he needs to pay rent at the end of the month, I want to help him, not be his opponent and take him down like he was a mark (not what a true friend would do). I can practice the COLD READS approach to getting practice for negotiating. I now catch myself saying, How are you? when I greet someone and try to say something about how they are feeling and let them confirm, correct or elaborate on what I say. There are so many directions I can take this. How is their general mood (or health or freshness/fatigue level)? How they are getting along with others important to them. ( ...sounds like the wife put you in the doghouse again) How they feel about me, especially if this has changed since the start of our meeting or since the last meeting. (It looks like you didn't like what I just said, etc) How they feel about my idea or proposal. Negotiating and communicating have so many emotions and values wrapped up in them. I want to discover and use my own emotions and values to understand how I will get triggered to people. Someone recently said she is a performer. I asked, what kind of a performer? So she said she has a gig with a Disney cruise ship with 4000 guests. Her job is as a dancer. She got a broken ankle 3 weeks ago and has another week before she can start her training. I reacted badly to hearing this. I should have just said, that's nice and moved on but I can't ever see myself sitting on a cruise ship with a few thousand others, eat from the buffets, and watch live performers. It's just not in me. So I need to learn to stop my knee jerk reactions to what people do. I need to focus on how I can relate to people as individuals, with their own interests and respect their opinions and actions for what they are, and use that to focus on what I want, how we can come together for collaboration. (The biggest thing I want to use communication and negotiation skills is work as a concerned citizen to shape our city for better road safety and specifically to add more bike lanes, with my ultimate goal to bring or traffic fatality count down from an average of 50 people a year to zero. This involves knowing what changes to street design, car and bicycle designs, and road rules, then pitching these to the city... and other road users who may not initially want what I want.)
13:40 is what i needed to use a long time ago, pure gold
That’s right, Chris. This is excellence in communication.
These videos keep getting better
Thank you for those kind words!!
This interview was THE BEST…I’ve watched dozens of videos of Chris Voss and this one in particular was absolutely the best…I’ve only watched 20 minutes of it but I’m in for all 73!!
If you don’t watch any of Mr. Voss’s videos & The BSG in general and say in awe and amazement, “This is f****ng GOLD!” , who are you? I’ve never really said those words when I come across certain knowledge ... I’m a psych/neuro woman and that phrase has came out ever recent video. Eye feel at home here with different brain work.
I can't believe he did it to me again... Chris did it again, like he always does!
He has his own book. I read it. I watched a lot of his video talks. And pretty much every time he gives an interview... he drops the name of another book that helps us learn how to communicate better. I hate it when he does that. I have a list of 30 books to read because of him! I'm not a reader. But I feel compelled to read his book and all the books he recommends because I know how bad I am with communicating and I can become a bit better reading books every day. And it really is helping. But this process is so darned slow!
Every time Chris Voss makes a video from his desk I'm always trying to zoom in on the books behind him 😆, you say you have a list going of his recommendable books 📚, would you be opposed to posting the list you have here in a reply comment?
Care to share the list? lol
@@kathycarlos6537 @Doug Wedel if that list was a link to a Google Docs document, we could add to it over time 🤞
@@chuckMvideos Let's work on this list together. I suggested he dropped the name of a book and author in this current video. Name that, to get us started. I'd much rather have this a collaborative effort than I just post my own list. And the list we compile can lead us in a lot of different directions, depending on our own interests.
I read books on my breaks at work. I usually consume my lunch at first break, then at lunch break and last break I read. One of my coworkers asked me to lend her a library book I was reading. I said, go to the library and get it yourself. She said she moved across the border and no longer has access to it (but she does have access to a library in her new neighbourhood). She seems hung up on getting books from me, she says, you have a lot of books at home that you bought, right? Maybe I can borrow some of these from you? So I broke down and she's borrowing the fourth book from the Doug Library. The current one is Relentless, by Tim Grover. She's reading it for the third time, re-reading it to grasp more of the contents. At one point she said, why does he talk about a cleaner? I liked that question. Her second book was one I found on the street, in front of someone's house. To me, it's "the best book ever" because I honestly feel we are forgetting how to care about each other and a lot of our actions wind up as "thoughts and prayers" instead of actually helping each other.
Robert Myers, Get Your Loved One Sober
I use this book to inspire me how I can lead, in my community, at work, with friends and neighbours, etc. That goes way beyond dealing with alcohol and drugs in the lives of those close to us. I still have a lot to learn about this but this book talks on that subject. So please find and share the book/author Chris name-dropped in this video to get us started.
If it was easy we would all be doing it. The slow process is a natural process to weed out pretenders
Time stamps, copy and paste these into the description. Like this comment to keep it at the top of the comments 👍
00:00 Start
00:03 Lewis Howes interview, taking criticism
24:14 Chris Voss Fireside Chat on how Situation drives Strategy and the right use of Have you given up on...
31:27 Chris Voss at VTS Accelerate, the Jack Welch story, using Is it a ridiculous idea... using a calibrated No to get a Yes.
34:40 Derek Gaunt webnair, using Labeling and Mislabeling to get more intel from your counterpart, corrected with truth
38:01 Chris Voss, summarizing a situation to get a That's Right out of counterpart, the importance of leaving / ending a negotiation with the other side feeling respected.
43:54 Chris Voss Using No oriented questions to get the Yes
43:55 Is now a bad time to talk?
47:15 Is it a ridiculous idea...?
47:27 Are you against...?
48:36 Have you given up on...? Plus getting the Thats Right out of them. Sound like I've left something out...?
50:49 Letting out "No" a little at a time. How am I supposed to do that?
‼Important......👇👇👇‼
53:21 How to subscribe to The Edge, The Black Swan newsletter, TWO ways to do it.
(IF THE ONLY ACTION YOU TAKE AFTER WATCHING THIS VIDEO IS SIGNING UP FOR THE NEWSLETTER,
THEN YOU'VE ALREADY BECOME A MORE INFORMED NEGOTIATOR.
DO IT!! FUTURE YOU WILL THANK YOU)
54:47 On No a little at a time, Your offer is very generous I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me...
57:00 It sound like you have a place you want to start...?
58:20 What makes you ask? The ? behind the ?
1:00:19 It seems like you have a good reason for asking? Two inflections, ask then wait in silence.
1:01:06 It seems like you have a reason for not doing....?
1:02:00 Derek Gaunt webnair, The 2 functions of Tactical Empathy
1:05:53 Davi Johnson and Sandy Hein on using Labels and Mirrors on negotiating promotions, dealing with disrespect.
Also edit the title of the video by changing Negotiation to Negotiator or change it to ' Better negotiation in Any situation. Use these strategies to become better. ' Make it into 2 sentences.
How do I add timestamps to your RUclips videos automatically?
Sign in to RUclips Studio, go to Content, and choose a video. In the description, add a list of timestamps and titles starting with 00:00. To add automatic timestamps, select Show more > Allow automatic chapters.
amazing info. take notes, folks 📝
This is pure *GOLD* here
The Black Swan group has put together some amazing communication Techniques😎👍👍
wonderful interview. Lewis let's Chris shine . He teaches so n much here.
Very good message Thanks. Send this to the Vice President.
Been waiting for this!
Anyone have a link to that 8 Mile clip? And this is good stuff!
Wow this is so good
Great insights!!! This is very helpful!!
Powerful
Extremily useful examples! Thank you. Would it be difficult for you to explain for a simpleton like me: what do you mean by "eight mayowa" (spelling might be completely wrong, sorry)?
Gold
“For every hater there are 10 people that will be on your side”?
That’s a very assumptive ratio.
Chris Voss should be as big as Jordan Peterson. You should do debates to prove you are the badazz I known you to be.
I really liked the Jordan Peterson/Chris Voss interview on the Mikhaila Peterson channel...really insightful
14:00
Why do they keep talking about upgrades at hotels? I’m using this to close huge energy contracts
13:38
53:16 OK, but what if I have no choice?
Situation drives and decides the tactics, is this a coworker, client or family member that you are forced to work with?
No time wasted
Depends on the opinionated, if qualified, ill listen usually, they aren't qualified.
This thing about getting practice by asking for FREE UPGRADES, EMPLOYEE DISCOUNTS, I can see the value in getting our practice in. But it works against my sense of values of wanting to be honest, just, and (I know this is the F word) fair. So I have a built in aversion to using this and using it every time. I heard of someone buying from Mennonite farmers. What they were offering was a price about ten percent of the current market value in a grocery store. It was an absolute bargain. But when this guy asked the farmer to lower his price, he no longer wanted to sell to him, at any price, because he had an aversion to bargaining. I'm somewhere in between. I want to respect a price that works for me, I want to walk away if the price is too high, I want to ask them to lower their price if I really need what they are selling but I also need a lower price.
This could be one of the reasons I don't play poker. I don't want to gamble "for moral reasons" because I don't want to risk losing money, I would not know how to continue my relationship with a friend when I won money the night before that he needs to pay rent at the end of the month, I want to help him, not be his opponent and take him down like he was a mark (not what a true friend would do).
I can practice the COLD READS approach to getting practice for negotiating. I now catch myself saying, How are you? when I greet someone and try to say something about how they are feeling and let them confirm, correct or elaborate on what I say. There are so many directions I can take this.
How is their general mood (or health or freshness/fatigue level)?
How they are getting along with others important to them. ( ...sounds like the wife put you in the doghouse again)
How they feel about me, especially if this has changed since the start of our meeting or since the last meeting. (It looks like you didn't like what I just said, etc)
How they feel about my idea or proposal.
Negotiating and communicating have so many emotions and values wrapped up in them. I want to discover and use my own emotions and values to understand how I will get triggered to people. Someone recently said she is a performer. I asked, what kind of a performer? So she said she has a gig with a Disney cruise ship with 4000 guests. Her job is as a dancer. She got a broken ankle 3 weeks ago and has another week before she can start her training. I reacted badly to hearing this. I should have just said, that's nice and moved on but I can't ever see myself sitting on a cruise ship with a few thousand others, eat from the buffets, and watch live performers. It's just not in me. So I need to learn to stop my knee jerk reactions to what people do. I need to focus on how I can relate to people as individuals, with their own interests and respect their opinions and actions for what they are, and use that to focus on what I want, how we can come together for collaboration. (The biggest thing I want to use communication and negotiation skills is work as a concerned citizen to shape our city for better road safety and specifically to add more bike lanes, with my ultimate goal to bring or traffic fatality count down from an average of 50 people a year to zero. This involves knowing what changes to street design, car and bicycle designs, and road rules, then pitching these to the city... and other road users who may not initially want what I want.)
Sounds like you’re scared of conflict