How Do I Get My Wife On Board?
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- Опубликовано: 4 окт 2024
- How Do I Get My Wife On Board?
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Before getting married, agree on...
1. Money
2. Religion
3. Kids
4. How to handle In-Laws
@RealBloppy Live at least 2 hrs drive from both sets LOL
5. How much I spend on guns
6. How much she spends on clothes and accessories
704ab If you spread your budget into “my money, your money and our money” your gun expenses and her shoes expenses will come from “my and your” category. You both feel free to spend it as far as you put your money into “our money” right on time and budget.
5. Prenup
704ab I’ll IPO make
If you’re not on the same page financially, it’s gonna be a tough marriage
MATT'S MILLENNIAL MONEY yes it will be.
It is something you need to talk about when you are in a relationship, before engagement.
Kelly Jeon So true.
But marriage is always tough. There's always something that will challenge you.
@@kellyje11yahhhh yes but what if they act like they agree with you or think they agree with you and say they agree and then afterwards they don't? Marriage is challenging no matter what and I think that people should commit for life even when things turn out the way they don't want. Counseling and talking, faith in God and prayer
I got my wife onboard by having a financial sit down with her..... I showed her a video of Dave Ramsey on You Tube! She said ok what do we do! I showed her $1000 in cash and said that’s baby step one! She laughed and said I have been waiting for you to do this! She already knew about Dave Ramsey!
The most asked question is on cruise lines:
*how I get my wife off board*
I’m 17 and learned so much from Dave that taught me how to be financially good and not to do dumb things with my money to make myself go broke. Thanks mr Ramsey
Show her the rewards of the plan. Let her focus on that. Bitter work, sweet rewards.
DAVE SAYS IT ALL THE TIME, money problems are the biggest reason for divorce in America
No, the gynocentric family courts are the #1 reason for divorce. It incentivises women to leave the marriage with cash and prices. Then these bailouts with further help and reward their behavior.
northsouth Stop being negative. It is mot charming.
Im all for Dave Ramsey, but I disagree with their suggestion here that the husband needs to cower to his wife and apologize so she can see the reason to follow the baby steps. If she doesnt see the why her goals are not whats best for your family her goals are whats best for her.
I think it was apologize for the way he approached it. They're just saying he needs to change his approach and possibly get counseling
Luckily my wife and I have been on the same page financially from day one. Whenever I wanted to spend on something that was a want not a need, she would say, ‘You can do (X), I’m going to retire.’ That would snap my head and reorient me to our common goal. I’m now retired at 62, she is winding down her business and we are set, even with the ‘recent unpleasantness’.
Congratulations man! What a blessing to have a wife like that! Enjoy your retirement
Nice
Dave Ramsey: if the husband is not on board, it's because he is being a 'little boy'.
If the wife is not on board, it's because the husband has not explained it well enough.
Yep.
I really dig Dave Ramsey’s financial advice but when it comes to women and marriage he’s a complete simp.
Not what they said. They said he needs to probably be more emotional with her and they need counseling
If she doesn't get on board, tell her she will not see the inside of a restaurant unless she works there and that she'll have to get side job at domino's delivering pizzas.
BAHAHAHA! Yeah forcing your rules on your spouse will work reallllllllyyyyyyy well!
I'm not yet married, but I will one day and I will do the best I can to always honor my wife and bring her on board.
Thanks Lieutenant Colonel Simp for being the beta buck you are, and taking her off our hands
-Chad and Tyrone
@@corey407woc 😂😂😂 one less Karen we got to worry about.
Smart men don’t get married.
You need to get some red pill knowledge about female nature before you willingly walk into the slaughterhouse of marriage.
@@DBSSTEELERwow.
When 1st married my now-ex criticized me 4 saving money. He expected his parents to give him big bucks, they didn't.
At that time my money bible was the millionaire next door. And I got us there.
1 am 70 for a timeframe.
Congratulations.
Convince someone of the importance of something and you can get them to do anything.
Lol I recognise your profile picture from you always commenting in TFD's channel 😀...plesantly suprised!!
So, theoretically, if the spouse doesn’t get on board with doing better, you really just give up? Just take the loss and let them keep spending or get a divorce? I would have loved some expansion on that answer.
I would hate to say to give up. But if you want to remain with that person you may end up separating finances. Also you may want to look into the possibility of protecting yourself so you aren't responsible for the other person debts they incur inside the marriage.
It would be mighty hard to save if your spouse is spending as quick as you save
Well hopefully you're in a Christian marriage and your wife looks to you as the leader but I guess if not then you do things her way and let the whole family fail financially so that they can see their mistakes and hopefully decide to do at Dave's way in the end
Also he said marriage counseling not giving up lol
had to agree to do dishes for 10 pages per dish washing until she finished the book. short term sacrifice for long term freedom lol
How do I get my wife off board
MMT Investing LOL
That's the easiest part 😂
THANK YOU so much this is exactly what I was wanting to ask!
His first mistake was getting married
kobe yikes. Lol
dumb!!!
You won’t do that will you? Please say no! On behalf of everyone, we’ll be grateful.
Smart men don’t get married. I am not a smart man.
exactly just a funeral with cake
I wish my husband would hear this. All he does is read a book, start doing w/e he read and then I'm upset because hes not stated why hes doing something, then he gets upset with me because I don't agree with him spending a lot of money and his solution is handing me the book he read and telling me to get on board. And I'm always trying to explain to him that he needs to fully discuss things with me be4 starting anything, but he never listens. Its one of our biggest issues in our marriage and it fruatates me
Are you going to counseling?
Husband's roundabout = 'Not Really'
Great wisdom!
John says to talk to your wife you gotta get emotional ☺️☺️
That puzzled look for n Dave face in the thumb now says it all. How do enter another dimension would be a easier question.
Here's the thing... we women value SECURITY, and whenever the man we trust comes and suddenly wants to switch things up without giving us time to wrap our minds around it, that threatens our sense of well-being, especially if the basics of what we perceive as life are already in place. Generally, a person who feels threatened is not going to be helpful!
Here is what I observe men do who actually value and respect the women in their lives:
1. "Here is the CHALLENGE."
2. "Here is the THREAT down the road that not addressing the challenge creates for both of us."
3. "There is also OPPORTUNITY for us in addressing the challenge."
4. "We need to address the challenge and seize the opportunity, although I know doing A, B, and C will have a tough short-term effect on D, E, and F that are valuable to YOU, sweetheart."
This is the key. We women are still full-fledged people: we still have a will and intellect and personal needs and wants. If we spend time with a man long-term under any circumstances, it is because we trust him not to run rough-shod over that FACT. The acknowledgment of the fact that this change is going to hurt gives us back some of that sense of security we need to move forward.
This leads to two variations of point 5:
5.0: "If we can work hard together on this, we can seize the opportunity ahead faster so then we can each enjoy our D, E, F, G, H, and I down the road in security."
OR,
5.5 "... If we can work together on this, we will make so much progress that not too far down the road, we can add back a touch of D, E, or F so you can enjoy on the way to the opportunity."
Provided trust already exists, this method is very effective!
I've tried converting several members of my family to Dave's plan or at least a version close to it to start with, of those I tried, only 1 has stuck with a version close to Dave's plan, another has made excuses that they cannot because they said "In the budget just leave food blank. What ever is left over I'll put to that." I said, no, that won't help you out of your current situation. I tried explaining that you need to have extra money after your budget to put towards debt, they don't care. Others haven't even tried making excuses like "Oh, x needs clothes for school." When I say they really don't, I get turned off. It is all excuses, so I know the pain of wanting to help those seeking help (I never pushed them to do it, they asked me to get them on a budget to get out of debt and save), but they don't want to make the effort to make it happen. It is hard to constantly hear excuses, I feel I waste my time trying to help them. I even bought them all FPU and none of them even went to the first class or online. Showing people what they could do if they plan isn't enough. I learned I cannot help someone who doesn't want to put in the effort.
This is the tragedy of adult life... we cannot compel people to learn and apply anything even if they desperately need it. You can only help those who truly want to be helped.
There is a flip side... continue to do what you advocate and tell people: "when you are SERIOUS, do A, B, and C and then call me." The truly hungry will get into action and thus be ready for you to help them.
Yupppppppppppp they don't want to put in the work and they think their way is better. They will see in the end
I’ve found that changing the word “budget” to “spending plan” helps. I guess the term budget is processed by our brains as restrictive. Whereas spending plan processes as organization and still get to spend money
Thanks uncle Dave.
Christian Arcos good ole uncle dave
Yeah more like pops.
Any physician will tell you prevention is the best medicine. Be on the same page before you get married, and if you are not, don't get married.
How long until hyperinflation?
Weeks?
Months?
2 Years?
Looks like I wont be a millionaire, wife ain't on board lol.
The answer:
Communicate.
COMMUNICATION*
Good advice
I guess my husband knows about the baby steps and stuff he's been through the class and he has plenty of dreams but he doesn't want to put the work in and he doesn't believe that Dave is right about everything he thinks there are shortcuts. I think the answer is let him try his shortcuts and let them fail
You don't.
But
Try leaving her, she might get on board
You need to get your wife to see the bigger picture. Maybe she wants that but can’t see giving up the short term benefits. If you can show her that some short term benefits can stay but in order to get the long term benefits some have to go. Everybody sees things differently. Perception is reality! Keep trying bro!
Or throw her overboard 😂🤷🏻♂️
So I was looking through the playlist and this video was next to the "I feel guilty about my second job" video. Well it caused me to read the title of this video as "How do I get my second wife on board?"
What a missed opportunity.
That's tough. Dude is now a different person than the one she married.
These lit mobile ads are like all RUclips plays 🤣🤣 I guess they have no other ads to show me
Chris Vandernaald I noticed the same thing. Haha
Today is our 12 year wedding anniversary. She brought up why we can’t get that bigger house on three acres she loves so much ($600,000) while we have two current mortgages on two properties with the idea of selling what she calls our shoe box townhouse we currently live in (with our 21, 18 and 12 year old children) at $500 a month and $50,000 owing. The other one is $4,400 a month and $700,000 owing retirement home. I tried talking her out this one previously. We are both almost 50 years old now. We sold our family house we lived in before for 10 years previously to buy the retirement home out of town by the way and moved into our rental townhome two years ago by the way. That one wasn’t paid off either.
I said we can’t afford it at over 25% of our take home income. We need to establish a budget and figure out where we can sacrifice and how to possibility make more money. Pay off all our debt so we are disciplined doing so. And we don’t change our ways. She wants to pay down the mortgages first before her vehicle debt with the older children and the boat and credit card debt and before setting up a 6 month an emergency fund.
So you know. Lifestyle on the credit cards she won’t give up. And no budgeting for her. “I hate Dave Ramsey” she says.
I’ve done the dream end game vision of us sitting at our pool in 7 to 10 years as millionaires.
I’ve said how I feel about being controlled by debt.
My reasoning and questioning become mental abuse.
She drove away deciding to go to work spinning her tires puffing about she won’t do a budget or listen to me about anything. Contempt is the end of a relationship or one becomes abused staying in the relationship for the young children.
I might be there now.
So next thing is trying to get her to agree to go to marriage counselling.
In general at the beginning of a relationship men don’t want the women to change. She is selling herself physically and agreeing to be like him.
She wants to change the man for the better. Or rather for her control.
Now after 11 years we are at a complete 180 on the following so figure out how this will turn out.
God.
Children.
Money.
In-laws.
Any thoughts folks?
What do you think Dave?
Being in the same situation before, 90% chance she is not going to change. You are thinking logical and she is thinking emotional about this. She thinks you should do it because you can and probably have the money to do it but shouldn't. Ask her this, how much extra are you going to work to afford this? All we need is more income to have this be under 25% of our income so just work more honey and we can have it. You know what your going to hear back.... nothing. I had the same problem and that's exactly what I did. I don't think I have to say it but she did not work more to afford it she just wanted to spend more. There is no reasoning with this unfournately.
Physical Silver No Counter Party Risk.
Which one of your books is the starter book. Thanks so much a new viewer
Yay, first again!
She wears the pants and he comes in and asks in a quivering voice "ca-ca-can we pl-please get onto a budget?" and she swats him away. Grow a pair, man.
Tim Hultsman Yup. Pathetic. No shortage of simps out there.
You are probably right.
That was Dave's advise right? He didn't say that.
@@dusq123 of course he didn't say that but is there any doubt?
@@hondah35
You mean after Dave ask him to apologize right. That case may be, who knows.
“How to speak woman” ugh. I like the advice on how the task oriented partner can get the more feelings oriented partner on board, but that doesn’t always run down gender lines. I’m the one who’s more logical, let’s-get-this-done, and I def don’t need a feelings based motivation. That said, I’ve done what this guy is doing and stepping back to consider how the other person is feeling is a crucial skill that ppl like us need to practice. Hope he gets it
To defend his side I didn't see anything wrong with his approach but I am currently in his shoes and therefore highly recommended he apologizes.
I also suggest that he ask one of her friends to relay the message some other type of way
If you do that she will see you as weak and lose all respect for you. State your case firmly Don’t Cal town to her. Be a man.
Just live like you are. Dont add more problems. It will be ok.
My wife is "on board" as far as debt and living frugal is concerned, but her idea of investing outside of a maxed out 401k is CDs and high yield savings accounts. It's infuriating trying to plan our retirement.
This makes me wonder, because my fiance is a super saver, sometimes he comes at me about my dollar store makeup and $15 handbags. Maybe he needs to ask himself what he is asking her to sacrifice and if it is reasonable or worth the battle? Unfortunately, being a lady comes with a few extra expenses.
I'm fine doing the baby steps, but I'm still going to wear makeup for work and every 6 to 10 months I'm going to get a new handbag when mine starts to look worn.
I wonder what Dave's reply would be when my boyfriend is not taking financial responsibility seriously. Otherwise he is a wonderful man.
He usually says something like "Men are thickheaded idiots that don't get womens' subtleties. They need to be told directly. Don't just make an offhand comment while riding in the car or while he's watching TV. Wait until there are no distractions, look into his eyes, and tell him 'This matters to me'."
I'm not sure how accurate this characterization is for all guys in general, but I can say this certainly would apply to me.
Only marry a rich woman that way you’d be the reason she calls Dave to complain about
How can i get my husband on board???
The bigger question is how do you get your wife to see the bigger picture and stop indulging in instant short-term gratification? Women make decisions based on what feels good at a much higher rate than men, so trying to get her onboard with something that doesn't feel good is quite a challenge.
Keep playing Dave Ramsay at your house. Put his book out in the open. Let it be that it was her idea (even though it was yours). Keep putting money up.
Remind her that women should submit and be subservient to the man - according to the Bible.
Not lol
@Christopher Vento Not true. I am sure that everyone has a different take on it. I'm modern, some are traditional and some are hypocritical. 😊
Yeah they’re not want to hear that anymore. Feminism has even co-opted the Christian church.
Have her listen to tba
How do I get my wife on board? Simple: divorce her hahaha or take Baby Step #0: do not get married
Easy you don't get married...
Get a divorce
How does his wife plan on getting the beach house then?
webfreakz its just a dream
Getting a bigger loan 😂 😂 😂 😂
I was never nice ask let's do this for 20 years talk to her try to explain why nope
In other words, start wearing the pants in the house.
💖
To the streets!
Why does this always come back to the man's fault?
Because Dave is a Simp. He gives great financial advice but I’m convinced his wife has his balls in a jar inside the medicine cabinet.
Women like money? No... that’s not right...
I always imagined daves wife like the woman from long island medium. I was way off.
Dave Ramsay never gives women agency. He seems to think they are incapable of reason and must be reached emotionally.
Yeah I have noticed a woman calls in and Dave says her man is being a child and he needs to “man up”. A man calls in and Dave tells him it’s your fault you need to communicate with her. Dave is a Simp.
Get divorced
Hopefully in a Christian marriage the wife follows the lead of the husband. What does a wife do when the husband doesn't want to do Dave's way? Do it husband's way until he sees it's wrong
Gotta get rid of the wife, she’s holding u back
Tell her she can quit work if you guys become finically independent. It might work
Jim Smith lol. Yikes
I actually tried this with my wife and it still wouldn't work.
@@z040880 Thanks for being the example for what not to do. Think with your big head instead of your small head when you’re making major financial decisions like marriage. Don’t marry someone who doesn’t share your same financial values and make sure they are bringing a similar amount of assets to the marriage. The other option is to just NOT GET MARRIED