How I Stop Perfectionism from Ruining My Life
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
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How I stop perfectionism from ruining my life.
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Thank you all for being here today
Thank You for uploading this piece of art 🪐
You're welcome 🎨💕.
Just 8 min in and there are already 100s of msg's!! Sending you lots of love Lana!
I really like your calm voice
You're welcome
*i agree. when we seek for perfection, we’ll get nothing done. But when we allow ourselves to experiment, we can create something unexpectedly beautiful.*
I totally agree with that
That’s straight up facts bud
beautiful ? lmaoo. everyone here is so delusional
@@bulabuakn4013 may I ask how do u think that everyone here delusional?
I have to agree, humans are imperfect, thus we are not capable of making perfect work. Bit we are the next best thing, it is evident in centuries of our oancestors building the world that we today live in and we inherit that exellence and advance with it.
"perhaps 'perfect' is more about how something feels rather than what it actually is"
i will never be the same 😐
True
Who said this?
Most of the time it is Dear and it does make a difference
@Tyler Gibson I did but I was doing something else as I watched it 😅
she’s the one older sister we all need
Indeed 💯💯
Totally trueeeeeeee
Exactly
So true💯
“If something is worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.” - GK Chesterton
Love that! Thank you for sharing 🤩
Hmmm
It frees a lot of pressure
“Remove expectations from people and you will remove their powers to hurt your feelings. If you don’t like something, just take it away, it’s only power is your attention.” ✨
Perfection is (oftentimes) a mask of insecurity. We want to make everything so incredibly perfect down to the smallest of details so that we can control (as much as possible) the comments of others because receiving negativity/critique is something we find hard to deal with. Just some food for thought 💡
deep!
@@inarijm Haha, that's how we roll 🧘♂️
I feel attacked.
@@muntashirrahman2529 😄definitely not my intention haha - but awareness can lead to change if you let it
That's exactly me😭 a perfectionist scared to death about what people might think... Any advice?
Perfectionists love fantasy, and living in a fantasy for too long can make it harder to create anything in reality. Or at least that's my experience...
Omg that’s so accurate 😱
This is so meee
This hit me hard..Craving to be a perfectionist once i got trapped in such fantasyland & it took real longgg time to get out of it
!!!
This is so me and hence I can attest you are so right.
Anything that makes me feel less like a muggle is perfect.
oh yes!!
Does anyone else feel like they’re watching a movie in the theaters versus a RUclips video? 😅 I loveeee it.
Yeaah! That's how I feel everytime I enter into Lana's channel. Incredible
Thank you Ashley
It’s so good tbh, I enjoy it even more
Yes the quality and editing is so good
Agreed. Her videos are perfect♡
Strive for continuous improvement, instead of perfection
Learning to apply this in my life
lol . just posted that.
Perfectionism is still a huge part of my life. I feel like I have to be a perfect cook, a perfect student, a perfect friend, a perfect sibling/family member/daughter, have a perfectly flat stomach, have perfect skin, get perfect grades, be a perfect musician, have perfect grammar/spelling and have everything perfectly neat and tidy. It's actually really annoying. To be honest, I've always been like this, ever since being a little girl. This video helps a lot though, thanks, Lana. 🦋❤️
Aimee Jane, I get what you are saying. We just work toward being a better version of our own selves each day. Take one day at a time & God will take care of the rest. ♡+ :) Progressively being perfected.
*Don't compare your 2. Chapter to someome elses 20. Chapter. Compare yourself to just your yesterday. And if you constantly see an improvement that means you are on the right track.*
I hope you have an amazing day. 🖤
@@_maxfreedom well, I don't have a robot but I am a robot
@@_maxfreedom does that count?
*"Everything in life is easier when you don't concern yourself with what other people are doing."*
The chances of you seeing this comment is pretty low, but if you did, *I hope you have an amazing day.* 🖤
💕thank you for this
@@inarijm you are welcome :)
@@AhmetKaan yes!! main reason why I deleted my facebook and instagram :) much more peace in life now.
@@gabriellaholmstrom4391 great! Even though I create content on RUclips etc. I also deleted Instagram
@@AhmetKaan nice quote, let me subscribe to your RUclips channel.
I have just blocked my Instagram account
Perfectionism is definitely something that creators struggle with, the idea of never showing your work because is can always be better. However, I have found that daily journaling, starting RUclips and ‘showing my work’ has helped a lot with my old perfectionist self ! Thank you for this
“When you fall in love with the process rather than the product, you don’t have to wait to give yourself permission to be happy. You can be satisfied anytime your system is running.”- James Clear
stressed out anxious human being = me, perfectionism is something I have dealt with since I was young. i'm slowly learning to let go of that "control." I had to realize for myself that Im just going to make myself miserable if I kept living life like this and I dont want to look back at my life in misery
Psych2Go fam!
@@arpitkumar4525 YES YES YES!!!! hiii
You never have to be THE best, just do YOUR best, and enjoy the process while you're at it. Have a wonderful day everyone!
Exactly!
So true! With social media not we start comparing i stead on focusing being a bit better then our version yesterday 🤗
I had a depressive episode last year November and that's when I found your channel. From then I have always been learning and growing from your channel. I have totally recovered from it. Thank you for just existing and being a light🙂
Wow 🥺Made my night.
Too many people spend too much time trying to perfect something before they actually do it. Instead of waiting for perfection, run with what you go, and fix it along the way. Thank you for being here, Lana!
Literally your the most calm person on here lol
you're
@@ocp5062 not the grammar natzi coming for me lol
@@ocp5062 lovely contribution!
She is
Those 5 dislikes, I don't know what they have been drinking, give this woman 1 mil views already
They've been drinking the Kool-Aid
@@SoulVlogs744 mvp comment
There will always be those that get triggered by a person’s good intention and hard work. Best to ignore and keep doing what we do! That’s what I tell myself in my channel as well 😅
@@intentionalliving7326 yeah like I don't mind if someone disliked and explained why / gave constructive criticism, ofc there will be few that disagrees sometimes
I am on my deepest anxiety, and been depressed for 3 month already. Just when I'm about to hurt my mind I pray for some help, and upon searching for worship song I happened to cross over this wonderful channel. Thank you, yoy save me today and will always, I love you always❤️ .
Keep praying! I’ll pry for you
Honestly perfectionism just wastes so much time on pointless stuff that makes no difference.
Yep totally
Yep just do it and then come back to refine it
Exactly
me trying to convince myself in making school projects but did it anyway with "perfection"
True and most times it comes out worse
Omg, it’s like You’re reading my mind. That’s exactly the problem I struggled with today. I always want to accomplish 100 tasks a day and then I always end up crying and being overwhelmed...😂🥺❤️Thank you for helping!
Hugs from a fellow youtuber ☘️
“ Perfect “ timing for me to, I always get stuck when trying to create something, and have to abandon it only in the thought layer, I rarely got to the next step and start making it happen .
Now I feel that my lack of trust within my capacities, and now giving some time to nurture those new perspective so Ican develop that trust and start going to the next step and making it happen !
Me too and I think that being perfectionniste can sometimes really be toxic...anyway I hope that you will find peace with yourself, like I wish it for me with the help of god❤️
This video came at the right time! I'm actually drawing a post about perfectionism at the moment. 😄👏
Everyone thinks perfectionism is awesome. But actually when we strive to do something "perfectly" we actually stop ourselves from experimenting, exploring, and actually completing our work. We can get stuck in some weird place where we're too anxious and too focused on small details to move forwards. So it's better to do "good enough" than try to reach some unatainable perfection.
I've always struggled with perfectionism, and at times it has kept me from doing things that I really wanna do. Thanks for this video!
I have never in my entire life seen a video that incorporated a sponsor's message in the storytelling like you did in such a simple yet elegant way!
"Don't aim for perfection. Aim for better than yesterday."🌺
You're videos help get me through some of my worse day's. I am a loner, I live in a dangerous neigherhood, I don't have a whole lot of friends(only one), I've been forgotten by my family and been laught at by my community for just being a caring human being. Your videos help me stay sane during these dark times. Thank you so much.
*If you are reading this, never ever give up. We will succeed. I'm cheering for you!*
Have a great day! 🖤
How sweet!! Hope you have an amazing day!!
@@VASUNTHARAI thank you!
Much appreciation here. Thanks for those kind and thoughtful words, Ahmet Kaan. May God increasingly bless you. ♡+ :)
This is fantastic to know there are quite a few of us struggling with this problem! I often know from the very beginning that the execution will not match my vision so I never start...
Hi Lana, thank you for offering your sound & grounded voice - I have been releasing my perfectionist tendencies as a student this year - I used to study to the point of crying to make myself understand 100% of the material & my marks were very good but my mental health was broken. This year I am much healthier mentally & have given myself permission to simply try my best & release the need to understand everything. My marks are still as good as they’ve ever been & I spend half the time studying! I still have far to go but this experience taught me how my desire to achieve an ideal created suffering in so many experiences where I could have otherwise been thriving. Humbling reality check.
I love this! "Perfect is the enemy of good"
Main thing is to start and keep going!
as a former perfectionist (still working on this aha) i think its key to remember that you can never please everyone...whether its the work that you put out or the life you live
Perfectionism has ruined my teens & my young adult life. My whole life I have been afraid to try new things because I was so scared to be inadequate or to fail. I am still stared to apply for a new job, speak up in a class, or dress differently than I do on a daily basis. I keep thinking of other people's opinions about me and it's taking too much of my valuable time. I have decided to start therapy a few months ago when anxiety hit me harder than ever. It's getting better and my god I'm learning so much! I can't believe I've wasted so much time chasing for perfection, something that DOES NOT exist.
The tips you gave us in this video are great tools to conquer perfectionism, thank you Lana!
Your ‘talking to yourself’ scene at the beginning is so true and relatable.😭🎨
Thank you for this video, let’s hope we dont struggle with this perfectionism thing soon
I remember the moment that I heard the phrase "done is better than perfect" and it has truly saved me sometimes. Being a smaller creator I always want to put my best foot forward but at the same time there is so much magic in not creating sometime that you imagine as the ideal. That means there is always room for growth, room for exploration and room for inspiration to navigate a different path. Loved this video Lana and can totally relate. I sometimes think my "perfectionism" tendencies are a branch of my "people pleasing" tendencies. Sometime to continue to work on for sure. Much love! xo
My piano teacher is a perfectionist and sometimes it ruins things; I'll never be good enough no matter what. It takes the joy out of things
Your idea of thinking to yourself that this isn’t the thing that you need to do, but it is so exiting and I want to learn it and quantity = quality is so true! It inspired me and helped to successfully run an interview which first made me stressed and anxious. Thank you ❤️
these words that you just said are very wise "perhaps, sometimes, perfect is more about how something feels ,rather than what it actually is" I love them
She is beauty with brain
@@IshaSharma11 that's totally true, she's very smart
I love your personality, calmness and intelligence. You're really an amazing person and I can't get enough of listening to you 🤗
Thank you for those kind words!
*Perfectionism is a dream killer* 🥺 Thanks so much for sharing, Lana! 💕✨
thank you for watching :) x
I got chills when the inner-monologue started because I can definitely relate to my thoughts spiralling right before and after I do things even if it things I enjoy like writing a blog post or filming a video. I feel seen, thank you Lana for another great and reassuring video 💕
Lana, this video was so helpful for me!
This past weekend, actually, I had a good talk with my mother about perfectionism .. or more to the point that nothing is perfect. I’ve been struggling lately with my anxiety, OCD, work, dating, life in general. Between the conversation with my Mom and all the great points and examples you shared in your video, I’ve really found that in the past few days I’ve developed a better sense of calmness and acceptance about the idea of “perfect”. Thank you so much!
I’m currently reading Atomic Habits and this video just came at the right time! One idea I got from the book is that we’d rather plan stuff than actually doing it. And this could also apply to “perfectionism”: we’re always thinking of the “best” way to do a task, which is not that important, and thats leads us to lose precious time we could be using to do that task instead. It’s more about the process and actually taking action than the result or planning the (perfect) result.
Omg that’s me that’s so me, I make so many plans and the best plan to become happier then I also “manifest” which makes me go into fantasy and I never really do the things I say I’ll do. It feels like I’m just setting it up for someone else to do the work, I never focus on the hard work because it feels so hard to do that
Perfectionism can come from not feeling good enough. This is was definitely true for me. So if you’re struggling with a project or there’s something you’re working on just go for it and learn along the way. YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH ⚡️
Thank you Lana for sharing this thoughtful video. I often catch myself thinking that I need to gain as much knowledge as possible to be a smarter and more skillful person. So I often ruminate on the information to the point it starts causing enxiety.
The thing I hate the most are bullet points - I just need to remember them all, so I go over them multiple times, but end up forgetting everything I've read. Maybe it stems from the times when I had to sit tests at college and failed multiple times because I couldn't remember a really important piece of information. I've always thought I had a terrible memory.
Your idea of enjoing the activity and gaining skills is not brand new, but it helped me understand that I don't have to be perfect to learn and become a better person. Studying for tests still gives me anxiety though.
Great video, thanks for sharing. As a perfectionist I found it helpful. I often times find myself not starting a project because the feeling that I it has to be “perfect” has already taken the enjoyment out of it. Focusing instead on the “process” sounds like a good way to help with that.
this is such a realist approach, absolutely love it!
Hi Lana, I commented a few days ago saying this video helped me with my perfectionism issues and I would post a video after so many years just because I felt like nothing, including I was good enough. Today I posted and a big part is because of you! Thank you❤️
No, you aren't the only one who waited all day for a Sunday Lana upload.
Thanks queen you changed my life
Consistency is soooo important.😊 While we should strive to do our best and put effort into our projects, we don't need to make every project our best ever. We learn from every experience so staying on track and trying again and again is ESSENTIAL!
You know being perfect is something I always try to achieve, why because I feel like I don't belong to a certain place if I'm not perfect, and its one of the reasons why I always keep letting my self down, but you actually made me want to start making RUclips videos again, because i stopped making them because i felt like a loser because i wasnt perfect, but from now on im going to change that and start doing something in my life instead of waiting for nothing.
I know that no one is perfecf but i always thought that everyone else is excpet for me.
Love this video a lot, especially the part at the start where we could hear your perfectionistic thoughts. Such an awesome creative spin to the video.
You put so much effort into this blog. I hope it's rewarding enough for you and I hope it pays well. Because we need more of this kind of content here, instead of those loud nonsensical videos from many bloggers that want to go viral with silly things.
6:27 I love this part! It's so funny and it makes us understand how we oftentimes pay too much attention to the outcome of our work and way too little on the process of growing along the way. Thank you for being on RUclips and inspiring everybody with your great, well-thought-out content and your genuine personality!
this is definitely a reminder that i badly need right now. i’ve always wanted to do a lot of things as some passion projects and such, yet i ended up not doing anything because the thought that i still don’t have the perfect this and that has been holding me back.
also, i love that tip regarding the power of our words. rephrasing the “i need to” to “i want to” is really something that helps. ♥️
You described exactly my thoughts about perfectionism! I have an image in my head about something, but I’m not quite sure how I should start working on it and what I actually want to create and how. And then I end up demanding myself for some sort of standard and quality which I can’t fulfill. Then I feel like I haven’t done enough or that the whole thing just failed, and I’m not good enough. This all is so frustrating, and I just realized watching this video that I should start taking life more gently and let the things happen, and not be so harsh on myself.
no YOU described my perfectionism. It’s insecure of me to plan and plan, just stress myself out and not do anything at the end. 😕 how do I get out of this. I guess gently exist and let go.
I thought that as a Year Three Student perfectionism were not really an option, but since a few time, I try to enjoy more the idea of learning new things than having a very good degree with honours. I have the chance to love what I'm studying, foreign languages are inexhaustible, and after reflection, I don't want, never, to have the feeling it's a burden for me because it gives me so much joy and I don't want to lose that. But it doesn't mean I'm just going to learn whatever I want and waste opportunities (and fail my degree), I just want to focus on why I'm learning, why I love that, and what I want for my future
I really needed this! I'm in the middle of my exams week and I haven't been able to study because "I wasn't doing it good enough", and instead I've been binge watching youtube, reading and taking long naps. This has given me a bit of motivation
We succeed despite the perfectionism, not because of it.
When I think about perfect, you are one of the perfect people I have ever seen. You are always so great. Your videos and your voice are so therapeutic. You are so nice, kind, beautiful, smart, and interesting. Thank you.
perfection is like whe a dog chases his own tail.hes wasting time looking for something he already has.accepting yourself and enjoying life is as close to perfection as we can get.
it look a long time for me to recognize myself as a perfectionist. perfection seems like the bare minimum to me, and the bare minimum seems like nothing but my obligation. low performances doesn’t make me feel awful, but it makes me compare myself with others. also, it doesn’t seems like i am worth enough. i hate making mistakes. i look for family’s validation and intelectual validation for myself too. if it seems too hard, i think i’ll fail, so it’s better to not even start and to not create any expectations of it. dealing with adhd, anxiety and perfectionism it’s TIRING.
Your beautiful in every form and you’re are exponentially amazing. Your lighten my mood and me make more calm.
Your videos and your stories are illustrated so perfectly I don’t ever get tired of having to listen to you Lana. If I ever do meet you in life I’d be your biggest fan.
You also motivate me to better in life. Making me realise how things are. Thanks for making me feel like someone may god bless me someday to meet you.
Done is better than perfect!
*I wasn't feeling like posting today's video but I did it. Yes, it is not perfect but it is there!*
That shot at 1:46 of pouring coffee/tea from just a normal pot instead of the fancy kettle is just the perfect embodiment of this video.
Your videos are PERFECT if you ask me! You helped me find myself 'creatively' speaking. I was lost until I found you and now it's all clear to me. I know exactly which path to take. I truly am a huge fan! Thanks
Oh wow, you have no idea how much this comment means to me! Hugs xx
sometimes perfectionism kill my thoughts.. my mind will keep on thinking about my past works and the mistakes i made.
You have been journaling for years.
The depth of your ideas, your insight. It shows in you ...
Lana, reaaaaally, you make me see the life in a so much more relaxed way. Usually I'm stressed out because the idea of "being productive" all the time, but lately, I watch your videos and I'm starting to see life from another perspective, a perspective more calm and healthy so, thanks for it.
Have a good sunday, regards from here, Argentina
thank u, Lana. I just written an academic paper which when i read again after passing it, it's weird that i could actually see my anxiety through my work. I had just an online lecture where our professor seem to detest our class. I'm here to destress a bit and look through other worlds of ppl so i won't make mine small. Looking forward to more videos. xx
She have a calmness embedded within her.
Just be mindful of the moment, one step at a time.
Seek no perfection, and perfection will find you before you realize.
Well said!
This video is the true exemplification of accepting what is... that's bliss
You smile for almost the time of this video, which proves that you are talking about one of the most interesting and signature part of yourself.
I always seek for perfection. These days this problem was growing more in my mind. I was exhausted. I even write about it in my journal and tried to find ways to get over it and the reason why I was craving for it. Thank you for posting this video. The thing I found out while journaling was that we should take action and then enjoy our work. Don't care about the outcome. Everything will gonna be the way you want in the end. Yeah, you are right ideas will pop up in your journey. The thing is we should take action.
That transition was a perfect way to bring the point home, I can tell you that much. Usually I have no problems with stomach growls, but do constantly have to cut out the sounds of myself sipping coffee...maybe I should just leave those in.
How you are so relatable to most of my life struggles, one of them is procrastinating work because this perfectionist thought always annoys my brain. So I thank you for this vid.
I've been thinking about the reason why I feel like I've got so many responsibilities when I'm not !!! for some reason I keep feeling that my responsibilities are sooooo heavy and make me breakdown every now and then, I loved when Lana mention that we have to choose our words cause it really sounds so much better when you say things in a different way to yourself. I think all of us should take notes from Lana's videos.
Thaaaaaaank yoooou :)
People misunderstand perfectionism as people being or doing this until they get it perfectly and stress about it.
But the thing is that it is about does it feel perfect to you and being secure about the work that you've made. 😀
This video is really life-changing. I needed this video to watch today because perfectionism has affected my life so hard. Even leaving comments on RUclips puts me into perfectionist mode. I am trying to somehow minimize its impact on my life. It is not easy but doable. Your videos are getting better with each passing week. Keep going, Lana! We believe in you!
Thank you so much for this lovely comment!!
I'm so lucky that I found your channel. It really improved my English, knowledge, and inspires.
Thank you for sharing.
I found inspiration to start my channel on a rainy morning last September. I didn't have a plan or structure for it, no fancy equipment, and little faith that what I'd create could actually matter. I'm still on that road, but I'm ALWAYS working to remember to allow my perfectionism to take a back seat. All my love to you Lana!
I agree - don't just consider the outcome, also consider the process of achieving the outcome. This has saved me from feeling overwhelmed and giving up. If I plan and execute the small steps each day that lead to accomplishing my desire at a set time, it helps me to remain committed and motivated. Great tips Lana.
Other people trying to sell this idea of perfectionism used to make me anxious, as if I am not doing well enough and how much so ever I try I would never be enough. Till my father was alive, he would pump me up on those vulnerable days of excessive self doubt. Now, 8 months into his death, I have realised I need to work on self-resilience.
Good insights. Atomic habits is a game changer. I realize there are 2 types of perfectionism that is common. Task perfectionism (high standards), Truth owning (my way or high way).
Deactivating my social media accounts made me less perfectionist. It gave me a peace of mind because I forgot the thought and feeling of pleasing anyone and striving for validation by being perfect in their eyes. At the end of the day, we are only humans. We are made to be real, not perfect.
oh I want to hug you. Thank you so much!
Seamless transition from commercial to video. Great job!
Few hours ago I was crying because I was feeling stuck in a spiral of perfectionism and harsh self judgement...
You couldn't choose a time more perfect than this to post the video! Thank you from the bottom of my heart because now I feel much better. ❤️
This makes me so happy to hear
“Love is essential than the pressure to be perfect.” ❤️
I’ve been wanting to start a yt channel since i was 16. I love filming, editing and watching videos from the past makes me happy. I was so scared of being judged and not having a good enough knowledge on filming and editing. I’m 24 now and i just started. Those years, i was not able to practice my craft. I kept thinking maybe if i started at 16 i would have improved so much now. But i am so happy and grateful now that i am able to do it. It’s nowhere perfect but i know i’m learning and enjoying the process. ❤️
Lana's videos are always worth watching.
I feel like I'm having a virtual conversation.
She's such a good person.
I was a perfectionist and was a heavy way of living! Now I'm perfectionism free and life it's much better! I get to do what I want without too much unnecessary overthinking around it.
Perfectionism really ruin my life. Thank you your video help me to stop it from ruining my life
I have OCD(not diagnosed but even if a psychologist says I don't have it I wouldn't believe it). I have stressed over the alignment of my phone wallpaper to the point it felt my head is going to burst. So this year I have the resolution to have at least 300 stress-free days. Trying hard to be mindful of my bad OCD habits.
Perfectionism makes you unsatisfied. Yet it gives you something to strive for. Balance is required.
Same goes to me. Being outcome focused (too much) leads to a slow progress and it makes me become demotivated because I'm too afraid of the result. Whenever I wanted to avoid the negative thoughts of being too outcome focused, it's like a World War between me and my thoughts😂.