Every time I have an intense cleaning day my boyfriend always has to remind me to rest and not go too hard or I'll just pull every muscle and plan to rest for the next 2-3 months until I do it all over again
@@DelorciousI'm so bad about "go go go" cleaning mode, bc if I stop to sit down and eat, the momentum is *gone*. And so I end up dizzy from not eating and my knees wanting to revolt and kill me.
Even if you’re afraid to sit down or stop, remember to keep hydrating and taking pee breaks. I know from experience that your kidneys will thank you later.
No they’re rare for you. Don’t speak for all of us. It’s so annoying how other ADHD’ers protest is as un productive and incapable. It’s like a stereotype and I hate it. A lot of us are capable adults who can manage and THRIVE despite our ADHD. It’s an absolute uphill battle to push back against stereotypes like this.
The worst feeling is when you have a super productive day, still have energy, can't concentrate to do anything but can't relax, and you just KNOW that you won't have any energy the next day despite having a bunch of stuff planned
THIS. it happens to me always in the middle of the night. I get this way at like 3 am, im exhausted but I cannot sleep but there's so much to do that I don't know WHAT to choose to do so I just...sit. it is awful.
Everyone fails to mention that the days where you clean the entire house you also forget to go to the bathroom or eat anything, but because you were so productive no one realizes. 😔😔😔
My bf has watched me do this and now won't let me if at all possible❤ it's kinda hard when he's at work all day but we're saving for a service dog so I can have those reminders/help while he's gone. Even if you have no help, you can still find some ways to do this for yourself that will make it less harmful! Best hack I found before I had help was setting an alarm to remind me (~every 90-120 minutes) and having a pile of things that need to be put away in the bathroom so I have a reason to go there. I only take 1-2 things from the pile, depending on how big it is, that way I will HAVE TO make more than 1 trip to the bathroom in a day. Hope you helps someone!❤
Don't forget that you of course didn't plan on cleaning for so long, so of course you don't think to wear gloves before spending four hours cleaning and get mild chemical burns on your hands. You do think about getting them several times, but you're always in the zone and almost done anyway, so no gloves for you.
The worst thing is when people say “ I know you can do it I’ve seen you do it before” when I am struggling to be productive, but I’m like it’s a different day.
Oof that hits hard. I got hyperfocus when I was moving out of my parents' house, I was super organized, had detailed lists and plans etc. My dad was impressed. Years later he still remembers it and asks why I can't be like that all the time, because he knows I can do it.
👏 when I tell me husband I did nothing today and just sit in failure, he always points out something I did, no matter how small. "You got the kids to school today 😃" "You got out of bed, even if it wasn't for a long time, you still did it! And you got the mail😃" And yes, he's been excited when I've eaten a cheese string 😂 He tells me that I don't need to be superwoman everyday. I'm so blessed to have him ❤
@@justaperson8385 😅 I have grabbed the grapes, realized washing them was way too much energy, stared at them for a long while, then eaten them anyways 😅 the choice was between eating them or washing them, I had the energy for one…if I had washed them I absolutely would not have eaten them
I knew where this was going the moment she started talking about being productive. Girl better be ready for 2 weeks of bedrest and doom scrolling after that day
😂 I don't know why, but your comment made me LOL because it's sooooo true! I'm the same way. Productive and hyperfocused to crash and burn for awhile. I've learned to give myself grace about the crash days.
I came to the realisation and I think the acceptance, today, that my life will never look like that of a fully functioning neurotypical person’s life and I will always have days where I barely move, no matter how hard I try, so from now on I’m simply going to try harder at just being me and learn to enjoy my down days, weeks, months or however long they last. When I’m living in 🎉my own chaotic way and not trying to be more functional, my heart rate goes right down and I actually feel like I get more done, albeit it in a less orderly way 😊 And thanks to videos like these, I am more accepting of myself and I think I’m going to enjoy life a lot more by not comparing myself to people who aren’t wired like me who live in a world more suited to them and not me.
@@autumn5852 I think this is a really important realisation, one that I've had myself but I don't always follow through on it. I'm happy that you think of yourself this way. Instead of shaming ourselves/others for not functioning as a neurotypical, we should love ourselves the way we/others are and find systems and ways that work for us.
@@sharonisalwaysfreezing thanks. I’m quite sure it will take some practice before I can say I fully live this way, but I’ve realised that I could have all the best systems etc in the world in place and even all the help I could possibly need but I’m still gonna have days where I can’t get out of bed, where I forget to eat, can’t stop scrolling on my phone and can’t get washed or dressed etc and I’ve realised, that that’s ok because for whatever reason, my brain isn’t wired to fit smoothly into a world where getting washed and dressed etc every day is considered natural and to not do that is to be considered unnatural or pathologically ill, lol, so I’m learning to accept me and live my life around me and not social norms, but I’m sure it will take a while as it’s as if those social norms are hard wired into most of us, but I’ll give it my best shot 😊
Dude that’s so real 😭 I had the adhd duality of focus today. I haven’t been able to focus on work for weeks, but when a classmate passed out in front of me I was instantly at her side and calm as cucumber as I helped her to her desk.
@@MoonlitBookworm73man I feel this! I work so well in intense and stressful situations that it scares me. I just... always know what to do. But I can't do anything for myself and after those moments I just mentally die and need to recuperate til the next time I'm needed 😂
@@ascoadia282 Literally!!! Tmrw I’m being forced to go to a wedding for people I have no connection with, and I am literally freaking out bc I have to dress up and wear my hair uncomfortably and be around noise and stuff, but I was so fucking chill when a person literally passed out 🤦♀️ Why must we suffer like this 😭
I try to keep hummus and veggies on hand specifically for days like this. If I’m struggling to cook or clean, at least I have some healthy and easy snacks to eat.
Add urge incontinence to this mood & it becomes the worst kind of Russian roulette 😅 I've learned just to get up now whenever I have an inkling that I "need to go".
@@brandiwyne I should have been in bed 3 hours ago. I first needed to pee 3.5 hours ago. I don't want to go to the bathroom for some reason I don't know why. I can't lay down to sleep until I pee. This should not be a Catch 22 situation, but somehow it is.
On my bad days its the same. But I've learnt not to sit down without a huge glass of water, and to keep chocolate bars and other candy or crackers near my desk. It's not healthy food but at least it something, usually.
@@HAnnB24Emotional support water bottle is your best friend. Have you tried puffed amaranth in chocolate? It's a complete protein, and popping teaspoons full of exploding seeds is dopamine mining at it's finest. Melted chocolate is just a delicious vehicle, amaranth works as a cereal too.
@js-tw3vs I love the idea of the water bottles with times, but none work for me since they all assume waking up at 6-7am rather than finishing work at 7am... I've never heard of that before, but looking it up, I'm not sure I'll like it but should keep it in mind to try. It notes it is related to/like quinoa, which I don't like but at least doesn't trigger my allergies.
Oh, my God, girl! Thank you for the best giggle of the day! These two sentences “ cleaned down to the baseboard” and “ haven’t moved in 12 hours” summed up my life in a nutshell! Thanks so much for creating community and humor about our magnificent brains!
I wish I could have those kinds of days! Whenever I feel productive and ache to clean the house, I'm at work. And once my work day is done, I'm so tired and overwhelmed that nothing gets done
I also have a thyroid issue so when I have had a productive day or two and I simply cannot wake up the next day (snoozing my alarm for HOURS) it’s like, Ah yes, forced rest, whoops.
I have those "forced rests" after being at my mom's cleaning out her house. I spent 2 weeks in June. It took me 2 weeks to recover and start doing things again. We're still cleaning it out (slight hoarder)... Each time I take days to rest. ❤️
Yep, it often happens like this. One of the differences meds have made for me is that I can now recognize when I'm borrowing against tomorrow's energy, so the first kind of day is less common, but so is the second
And if you did one thing for every other day this week, that is still 25 things done this week. 25 is better than none at all, and so is even just one.
Big mood. I'm in my second year of college and I'm getting a lot better at consistency and keeping my environment somewhat clean and tidy and keeping the to-do list down, but i'm still figuring things out, like "don't save this task for tomorrow if you have the energy to do it now because there is no way of predicting what kind of day it'll be when i wake up". Fortunately though, I've been keeping up with my plan to do bare minimum shower, wash water bottle, and do laundry every weekend. It's week 8 now, I think, and I've managed to stick with it! I don't have much homework this week since thursday through sunday is a break, but I will be working on an essay (which, now that i'm thinking about it, i am kinda betting on being able to sit down and just work for at least one day, so i'll have to be careful about that. I'm partway done with it though, so hopefully it'll go alright! I'll have to figure out something so that I don't, worst-case, immediately burn out on it)
Meeeee today… was so hyped for a job interview, dressed up, had my questions ready to go… got the time wrong. It never gets easier to recover from that.
😥 Condolences! You are not alone! The perverse silver lining I try to take from things like that is that it's a great rebuttal when I start gaslighting myself that my ADHD "isn't that bad." 🙄😟 Sigh. Hang in there! ❤️
I hate it on those days when I feel productive because I did a lot of things that I thought were important, ex. Cleaning, showering and reading, and then my mom tells me how unproductive I was because I did close to nothing to benefit the household
The rule is if your mom wants you to benefit the household (whatever that means) she needs a list of her shit ready when you hit Production Mode That’s how it works in business. She can’t just not give you anything and then yell at you in front of the CEO.
Please don't allow anyone not even your mother to make you feel bad about yourself. You are doing the best job you can of managing your life on any given day. You have a brain difference that makes you function different. The fact that you opened your eyes today and you are still here despite everything you have stacked against is enough reason to celebrate.
This happens to me so much that it's not fun anymore... I used to think of them like work and rest days but the rest days keep on increasing and productivity going downhill
The problem is the inability of choice. There’s no “let/don’t let” to it. As well, a lot of my “rest days” are NOT restful at all. They’re me either dissociating from overwhelm, or actively trying to internally bully myself into getting something done that I need to do. True rest or engaging in restorative activities is as much a “to do list” accomplishment for me, I’ve found. And “fun” things I can really hyperfocus on and that *could* have the benefit of being easier to start come with so much baggage of “I should only allow that if I ‘earn’ it by doing something necessary first.” So I either run out of time, or I use so much time and energy starting the thing that I’ve bargained with myself makes it “okay” to “earn” the thing that I did have motivation for, that now I don’t have the spoons left to do the fun thing anyway. Rinse, repeat.
@@RM-hi4vvI know this is from 4 months ago, but omg are you me??? Those all sound like such incredibly specific patterns (am in fact trying to avoid internally bullying myself right this moment because I know it's bad for me, but it's so difficult not to just go for it when it's myself lol), but upon reflection I guess probably more of us go through them than I'd realised
My son is the reason I get up and do things. Yesterday I finally got my butt in gear clearing out my bedroom. It was nearing an episode of hoarders. And it's looking respectable now. Except that meant everything needed to be gone through, then put away. Didn't do that yesterday. So I had to today or risk the tornado that is a one year old. Only, all the energy from yesterday is gone. I did manage to get it mostly cleaned up. But I'm crashing hard now
Try to keep track of your high functioning/low functioning days! ADHD symptoms are often greatly effected by hormonal shifts. If your high functioning days become easier to predict, you can plan for them. It's helped me pace myself and avoid some of the burnout from "who knows when I'll have this much energy again?! I gotta do all the things I've been screaming at myself to do!!!"
I meant to say "see if your high functioning days coincide with follicular and/or ovulation days and if your crash days coincide with luteal and/or menstruation phases"
@@lydianicolenorwick125 yeah, I'm literally within hours to a day or two of starting my next cycle, and going out to study today at uni was like someone was scrolling my len's focus in and out every other word. Had to switch topics twice just to get anything meanful done. I just know next week and the week after I'll finally finish that assignment I've been putting off for months, write up my rountine on my "freshly" line painted white board (I painted the lines two weeks ago), get my sewing projects (mostly) completed, get halfway through my library books and maybe actually remember to drink more water. We shall see.... I'm honestly surprised my doctor hasn't falsely diagnosed me with Bipolar disorder, cause my ADHD bounces real high during the start of my cycle, almost like hypomania, and the luteal crash is psychically painful cause I'm progammed to be hard on myself for "sloth", which inevitably leads to a depressive shame cycle if I don't do the basic "low functioning" tasks to avoid the worst of burnout (personally, I don't like high or low functioning for any kind of neurodivergence, because HF sounds like accessibility isn't necessary for the most part, only one or two things here and there, and LF sounds like one's needs are so high that your energy or capacity level needs to be completely augmented by external help, when taking both to the extreme black n white perspective as both aspies and some NT tend to). The best thing for neurodivergence, especially in menstrating women and afabs, whether it's ASD or ADHD, habit stacking works. So on days of lower dopaminergic reception, either due to low stimulus like a day off from work or overworking the day before, having daily rituals for the most automatic functions, such as wake up, go to bed, bowel movement, and the like, a habit can be stacked. For example, when I need to pee, I chug my drink bottle on the way (once my brain allows me to initiate the movements towards the loo) to keep hydrated, and refill once I wash my hands. I've been trying other, more complex stacks to see how far it can be taken and how well it works, so that once I know how to code Kotlin, I'll have an app up for basically anyone, however it will be most beneficial to NDs. I know habit stacking works, I just need to plan them out better, and I'm hoping that my future app will mitigate that initiation factor for NDs.
This! Since Covid this has been especially noticeable for me. It's like my body has aged a decade in that regard and is trying to do some early menopausal hormone nonsense. I'm taking a supplement now that helps balance out my days better. I'm still unavoidably blah a day or two before my period and manic the first couple days after, but not to the point of crippling depression or overpromising myself to others like I was before I started.
So relatable. I recently moved abroad and everything related to getting us to be cozy and comfortable is my job for one more month. So I basically fuck around for four hours then work hard until 1 or 2am. Then I get sick. So I know the unproductive days are definitely a built in cheat code to not get overwhelmed.
Not me being stuck in the executive dysfunction/paralysis state for the last days, and today I cleaned from when I got home from work like- 2h without a single break 😂
I felt this deep in my bones. I can go to an aquarium, a zoo, then go out for dinner, drive 6 hours all in one day and be fine. Even the next day. But as soon as I clean the house, start on a todo list, and even think about exercise… and not even finish cleaning.. I need a 6 hour nap, and I don’t eat until 10pm the next day.
Noooo🎉 cheese string , baseboards, doomscrolling & napping!!! Are you freaking kidding me??!!!! This ENTIRE short is EXACTLY MY LIFE! I thought I was genuinely losing my mind… this is so relieving boo. Thank you so much ❤
The feeling of accomplishment that rushes over me when I do all my chores on those few productive days makes me feel like the happiest person on earth I swear-
I feel like I live in the 2nd type of days whenever I don’t take my meds 😥 I know that’s what the meds are for, but it’s still frustrating having so much to do and feeling stuck
Started my day with a headache. Yesterday was a well-organized morning with many items ticked off my to do list. Felt so happy and good about it. Then around 5pm I was so tired and unmotivated. Today I had a therapy session, then made a simple breakfast for my son and me. After that, nothing. Tried to get motivated, but only got depressed instead. Feeling like nothing will ever get better.😢 I know there will be better days, but can't I just string together one week without feeling this way?
Yeah, twice a month I'll get that burst of energy to be productive, clean the house, laundry. The rest of the month is zero motivation and constantly forgetting wet laundry in the washer.
This is sooooo relatable! It's like one day you feel like you can take on the world and your full of energy and get lots of stuff done! But then the next day you can't do anything besides sleep and doom scroll!
One of my biggest wishes in life is to be able to have two productive days in a row without being under a deadline and hyper focusing for days on end to the detriment of everything that has nothing to do with the deadline.
... Why is that me? I did all of nothing all day Sunday (I kinda crashed at night and may or may not have had an anxiety attack) and most of Monday, after a very tired (not tiring, just tired) week, until I suddenly got a burst of motivation and energy to do EVERYTHING in the evening (getting and putting away the groceries, doing the dishes, cleaning floors and other surfaces, doing the bedsheets, organising my drawers, desk, and shelves, folding and putting away my clean laundry that has been on the rack for the past week, sorting the dirty laundry to do the next day because it was too late to do immediately, showering, prepping for the next day, etc.). My room was cleaner than it had been in WEEKS, if not months, and the next morning was wonderfully productive yet relaxed... I hope this keeps up but I already know it won't.
So relatable! Esp the getting up to pee thing... There's so much I always thought was just me, turns out I'm neurospicy af. Found out just before I was 50. Wow
Me too. I'm 42, I haven't been diagnosed, except for depression,but I know that I have had this my whole life. I hate having a bladder! Lol. I get the pee thing too. Most peeps don't. Until today I was the only one who said this to my friends and they think I'm weird. It's just what I do. But I'm not alone. And I like that.
I think of this as “god mode.” It also stands to reason that, as I am not a god, I cannot reasonably expect to be in god mode all the, or even all that frequently, as prolonged spells of god mode can, in fact, ravage my mortal form and leave me devoid of energy for the next three to five business weeks.
I am like this at work. At work I'm always killing and going above and beyond. But on the weekends I can't even get up from bed. I can't even socialize outside of work.
I'm burned out for so long by my high-productivity days that it's really not a good trade-off lmao, I'm trying to find ways to just do a little bit every day instead (not that it helps the burnout when I do have a hyperfixation day, but at least I'm trying to not depend on those days to get anything done) 🙃
Laughed out loud. Can barely do anything today. Yesterday was a 'clean the house' type of day. Low battery. The grapes need to be bought but I was definitely contemplating the shops.
I am getting to a place in my head where I just accept if I'm in stop or go. I'm not judging it anymore. I don't look at stop as something bad for myself and everyone, I don't look at go as always the setting I should be on, I've decided both presentations of me are fine. (I'm 49. I hope the rest of you take less time to see how amazing you are regardless of which mode you're in.)
So true. The abdominal pain from having to pee is what always makes me cave in. Then it's cheese stick time. But sometimes I'll just settle for scraps I find in my room
The more I see videos on adhd or autism, I’m starting to believe I’ve gone my whole life undiagnosed with one of the 2 cuz it explains sooooooo much about me. Which would be ironic cuz as kids we teased my brother cuz we taught he was autistic, even though he was never diagnosed. Well my sister is the same way so what are the odds of all 3 kids having something 😂😂😂😂😂
Remember that those first scenario days are few and far between, and that they are so so hard on us 😭
YES EXACTLY RIGHT
Every time I have an intense cleaning day my boyfriend always has to remind me to rest and not go too hard or I'll just pull every muscle and plan to rest for the next 2-3 months until I do it all over again
@@DelorciousI'm so bad about "go go go" cleaning mode, bc if I stop to sit down and eat, the momentum is *gone*. And so I end up dizzy from not eating and my knees wanting to revolt and kill me.
Even if you’re afraid to sit down or stop, remember to keep hydrating and taking pee breaks. I know from experience that your kidneys will thank you later.
No they’re rare for you. Don’t speak for all of us. It’s so annoying how other ADHD’ers protest is as un productive and incapable. It’s like a stereotype and I hate it.
A lot of us are capable adults who can manage and THRIVE despite our ADHD.
It’s an absolute uphill battle to push back against stereotypes like this.
The worst feeling is when you have a super productive day, still have energy, can't concentrate to do anything but can't relax, and you just KNOW that you won't have any energy the next day despite having a bunch of stuff planned
THIS. it happens to me always in the middle of the night. I get this way at like 3 am, im exhausted but I cannot sleep but there's so much to do that I don't know WHAT to choose to do so I just...sit. it is awful.
So true 😢
So many of us are naturally night people.
But you don't have the energy, you just feel the energy boost from other people and literally finish yourself without paying attention of yourself.
I can't relate i feel isolated . I am a nt think pattern while being self diagnose neurodivergent functional
Everyone fails to mention that the days where you clean the entire house you also forget to go to the bathroom or eat anything, but because you were so productive no one realizes. 😔😔😔
I swear that’s so real i almost passed out once because i put off eating so i could clean.
My bf has watched me do this and now won't let me if at all possible❤ it's kinda hard when he's at work all day but we're saving for a service dog so I can have those reminders/help while he's gone.
Even if you have no help, you can still find some ways to do this for yourself that will make it less harmful! Best hack I found before I had help was setting an alarm to remind me (~every 90-120 minutes) and having a pile of things that need to be put away in the bathroom so I have a reason to go there. I only take 1-2 things from the pile, depending on how big it is, that way I will HAVE TO make more than 1 trip to the bathroom in a day. Hope you helps someone!❤
So true
So true.
Don't forget that you of course didn't plan on cleaning for so long, so of course you don't think to wear gloves before spending four hours cleaning and get mild chemical burns on your hands. You do think about getting them several times, but you're always in the zone and almost done anyway, so no gloves for you.
The worst thing is when people say “ I know you can do it I’ve seen you do it before” when I am struggling to be productive, but I’m like it’s a different day.
Oof that hits hard. I got hyperfocus when I was moving out of my parents' house, I was super organized, had detailed lists and plans etc. My dad was impressed. Years later he still remembers it and asks why I can't be like that all the time, because he knows I can do it.
Right? Like that was a different day, a different me
"Oh look, you actually can be fast and organised..." is another disposable comment of ignorant bystanders...
it's really the worst. I have heard that so many times. And almost got no diagnose because of that.
New day new me
For parents/freinds of adhders, PLEASE be proud of us on both sides of the coin. That cheese string was so hard to get.
👏 when I tell me husband I did nothing today and just sit in failure, he always points out something I did, no matter how small. "You got the kids to school today 😃"
"You got out of bed, even if it wasn't for a long time, you still did it! And you got the mail😃"
And yes, he's been excited when I've eaten a cheese string 😂
He tells me that I don't need to be superwoman everyday.
I'm so blessed to have him ❤
And grapes you have to wash those. I just rinse them off but still
@@sweetfreeze5528wow thats great. Ive learned that this is helpful as well
@@justaperson8385 😅 I have grabbed the grapes, realized washing them was way too much energy, stared at them for a long while, then eaten them anyways 😅 the choice was between eating them or washing them, I had the energy for one…if I had washed them I absolutely would not have eaten them
@@JacquelineUnderwoodtotally relatable...
I knew where this was going the moment she started talking about being productive. Girl better be ready for 2 weeks of bedrest and doom scrolling after that day
😂 I don't know why, but your comment made me LOL because it's sooooo true! I'm the same way. Productive and hyperfocused to crash and burn for awhile. I've learned to give myself grace about the crash days.
This is so accurate lol. I'm scared of thinking that I'm getting my life together because I always end up dissapointing myself
That’s…yeah, that’s accurate….😅🥺❤️
Oof the boomerang from energy and focus to _cannot accomplish literally anything_ makes me feel verryyyy bad 😅
I came to the realisation and I think the acceptance, today, that my life will never look like that of a fully functioning neurotypical person’s life and I will always have days where I barely move, no matter how hard I try, so from now on I’m simply going to try harder at just being me and learn to enjoy my down days, weeks, months or however long they last.
When I’m living in 🎉my own chaotic way and not trying to be more functional, my heart rate goes right down and I actually feel like I get more done, albeit it in a less orderly way 😊
And thanks to videos like these, I am more accepting of myself and I think I’m going to enjoy life a lot more by not comparing myself to people who aren’t wired like me who live in a world more suited to them and not me.
@@autumn5852 I think this is a really important realisation, one that I've had myself but I don't always follow through on it. I'm happy that you think of yourself this way. Instead of shaming ourselves/others for not functioning as a neurotypical, we should love ourselves the way we/others are and find systems and ways that work for us.
@@sharonisalwaysfreezing thanks. I’m quite sure it will take some practice before I can say I fully live this way, but I’ve realised that I could have all the best systems etc in the world in place and even all the help I could possibly need but I’m still gonna have days where I can’t get out of bed, where I forget to eat, can’t stop scrolling on my phone and can’t get washed or dressed etc and I’ve realised, that that’s ok because for whatever reason, my brain isn’t wired to fit smoothly into a world where getting washed and dressed etc every day is considered natural and to not do that is to be considered unnatural or pathologically ill, lol, so I’m learning to accept me and live my life around me and not social norms, but I’m sure it will take a while as it’s as if those social norms are hard wired into most of us, but I’ll give it my best shot 😊
Dude that’s so real 😭
I had the adhd duality of focus today. I haven’t been able to focus on work for weeks, but when a classmate passed out in front of me I was instantly at her side and calm as cucumber as I helped her to her desk.
We exist to be calm when everyone else is freaked out.
If only normal stuff did not freak us out.
@@Plethorality Yeah…
The duality of not being able to do normal shit but being able to be insanely calm during insane shit
@@MoonlitBookworm73man I feel this! I work so well in intense and stressful situations that it scares me. I just... always know what to do. But I can't do anything for myself and after those moments I just mentally die and need to recuperate til the next time I'm needed 😂
@@ascoadia282 Literally!!! Tmrw I’m being forced to go to a wedding for people I have no connection with, and I am literally freaking out bc I have to dress up and wear my hair uncomfortably and be around noise and stuff, but I was so fucking chill when a person literally passed out 🤦♀️
Why must we suffer like this 😭
@@MoonlitBookworm73 And this is why, if you ever hang around first responders, you will realize you are surrounded by neurodivergence.
It’s the consistently inconsistent mood, motivation and energy for me. 😩
I try to keep hummus and veggies on hand specifically for days like this. If I’m struggling to cook or clean, at least I have some healthy and easy snacks to eat.
Every functional ADHD adult I know lives measurably on hummus and carrots.
I hate getting up to pee 😂
Add urge incontinence to this mood & it becomes the worst kind of Russian roulette 😅 I've learned just to get up now whenever I have an inkling that I "need to go".
I’m laying in bed right now realizing my bladder is about to bust…. I guess.. *sigh* ugh… oww 😣
Omg, me too. I'm glad I'm not alone cause until this point I thought I was.
@@crazylittleangel yup exactly. Saves my bladder and the irritated mood 🤣
@@brandiwyne I should have been in bed 3 hours ago. I first needed to pee 3.5 hours ago. I don't want to go to the bathroom for some reason I don't know why. I can't lay down to sleep until I pee. This should not be a Catch 22 situation, but somehow it is.
A whole cheese string? And, like, MULTIPLE grapes?! Jeez, that’s a lot to have eaten by 4:00p.m. on a weekend!
On my bad days its the same. But I've learnt not to sit down without a huge glass of water, and to keep chocolate bars and other candy or crackers near my desk. It's not healthy food but at least it something, usually.
Meh I get the point but your comment gives off pro-ana vibes.
@@HAnnB24Emotional support water bottle is your best friend. Have you tried puffed amaranth in chocolate? It's a complete protein, and popping teaspoons full of exploding seeds is dopamine mining at it's finest. Melted chocolate is just a delicious vehicle, amaranth works as a cereal too.
@js-tw3vs I love the idea of the water bottles with times, but none work for me since they all assume waking up at 6-7am rather than finishing work at 7am...
I've never heard of that before, but looking it up, I'm not sure I'll like it but should keep it in mind to try. It notes it is related to/like quinoa, which I don't like but at least doesn't trigger my allergies.
That’s why intermittent fasting works so well with ADHD people. I tell people that I literally forget to eat, and nobody belives me 💀
Oh, my God, girl! Thank you for the best giggle of the day! These two sentences “ cleaned down to the baseboard” and “ haven’t moved in 12 hours” summed up my life in a nutshell! Thanks so much for creating community and humor about our magnificent brains!
I wish I could have those kinds of days! Whenever I feel productive and ache to clean the house, I'm at work. And once my work day is done, I'm so tired and overwhelmed that nothing gets done
This sounds soooo familiar! 😅
I also have a thyroid issue so when I have had a productive day or two and I simply cannot wake up the next day (snoozing my alarm for HOURS) it’s like, Ah yes, forced rest, whoops.
Totally in one of those recovery and reboot modes after a cleaning day yesterday 😂
I have those "forced rests" after being at my mom's cleaning out her house. I spent 2 weeks in June. It took me 2 weeks to recover and start doing things again. We're still cleaning it out (slight hoarder)... Each time I take days to rest. ❤️
Yep, it often happens like this. One of the differences meds have made for me is that I can now recognize when I'm borrowing against tomorrow's energy, so the first kind of day is less common, but so is the second
Nice. Sensible balance.
It’s so real… and those high productivity days really kill Every other chronic illness I have & makes the guilt higher on days of low productivity
I'm starting to worry about how relatable your videos seem to me
After the previous day’s blazing trail of production I’m not at all surprised
I did 18 household tasks yesterday, including mending a tear in my mattress protector.
I've done one thing today.
And if you did one thing for every other day this week, that is still 25 things done this week. 25 is better than none at all, and so is even just one.
The second day is like 80% of my days 😭
And the allistics don't think we need to recharge after doing massive house cleaning, or maybe they don't expect us to be so burnt out from it 😭
Big mood. I'm in my second year of college and I'm getting a lot better at consistency and keeping my environment somewhat clean and tidy and keeping the to-do list down, but i'm still figuring things out, like "don't save this task for tomorrow if you have the energy to do it now because there is no way of predicting what kind of day it'll be when i wake up". Fortunately though, I've been keeping up with my plan to do bare minimum shower, wash water bottle, and do laundry every weekend. It's week 8 now, I think, and I've managed to stick with it! I don't have much homework this week since thursday through sunday is a break, but I will be working on an essay (which, now that i'm thinking about it, i am kinda betting on being able to sit down and just work for at least one day, so i'll have to be careful about that. I'm partway done with it though, so hopefully it'll go alright! I'll have to figure out something so that I don't, worst-case, immediately burn out on it)
Habit stacking is what helps ADHD focus the most
Before watching this I didn’t think I have ADHD but I relate to this wayyy too much and now I’m questioning my entire existence
Not me watching this, while on a ramen break, in the middle of house work/cleaning after a long ass week of doom scrolling & napping 😂
Meeeee today… was so hyped for a job interview, dressed up, had my questions ready to go… got the time wrong. It never gets easier to recover from that.
😥 Condolences! You are not alone! The perverse silver lining I try to take from things like that is that it's a great rebuttal when I start gaslighting myself that my ADHD "isn't that bad." 🙄😟 Sigh. Hang in there! ❤️
Oh no! So sorry. I can relate. It’s frustrating. Hoping something else comes up for you soon. 🤞
So sorry.
Sometimes the facts hits hard
When my motivation energy hits, I have to take advantage of it as much as possible because I'm not sure when it will come around again.
The cheese string is scarily accurate
When my body reacts this way I know I pushed myself to much the day or week prior. Stay healthy. It's okay to stay on the sofa❤
I hate it on those days when I feel productive because I did a lot of things that I thought were important, ex. Cleaning, showering and reading, and then my mom tells me how unproductive I was because I did close to nothing to benefit the household
The rule is if your mom wants you to benefit the household (whatever that means) she needs a list of her shit ready when you hit Production Mode
That’s how it works in business. She can’t just not give you anything and then yell at you in front of the CEO.
Please don't allow anyone not even your mother to make you feel bad about yourself. You are doing the best job you can of managing your life on any given day. You have a brain difference that makes you function different. The fact that you opened your eyes today and you are still here despite everything you have stacked against is enough reason to celebrate.
This happens to me so much that it's not fun anymore... I used to think of them like work and rest days but the rest days keep on increasing and productivity going downhill
1000% my life!! Those good days are so few and far between, though !!!!
It really do be like that. Every new day is a lottery with energy levels.
Ok but that second day is a well deserved rest period! Just...don't let it trail into the next several days. That's the true challenge 😅
The problem is the inability of choice.
There’s no “let/don’t let” to it.
As well, a lot of my “rest days” are NOT restful at all. They’re me either dissociating from overwhelm, or actively trying to internally bully myself into getting something done that I need to do.
True rest or engaging in restorative activities is as much a “to do list” accomplishment for me, I’ve found. And “fun” things I can really hyperfocus on and that *could* have the benefit of being easier to start come with so much baggage of “I should only allow that if I ‘earn’ it by doing something necessary first.” So I either run out of time, or I use so much time and energy starting the thing that I’ve bargained with myself makes it “okay” to “earn” the thing that I did have motivation for, that now I don’t have the spoons left to do the fun thing anyway.
Rinse, repeat.
@@RM-hi4vvI know this is from 4 months ago, but omg are you me??? Those all sound like such incredibly specific patterns (am in fact trying to avoid internally bullying myself right this moment because I know it's bad for me, but it's so difficult not to just go for it when it's myself lol), but upon reflection I guess probably more of us go through them than I'd realised
Lmao. Those first type of days are so rare 😂 And I need at least 4 of the slower days afterwards to recover 😅
My son is the reason I get up and do things.
Yesterday I finally got my butt in gear clearing out my bedroom. It was nearing an episode of hoarders. And it's looking respectable now.
Except that meant everything needed to be gone through, then put away. Didn't do that yesterday. So I had to today or risk the tornado that is a one year old.
Only, all the energy from yesterday is gone. I did manage to get it mostly cleaned up. But I'm crashing hard now
❤❤❤💪
Try to keep track of your high functioning/low functioning days! ADHD symptoms are often greatly effected by hormonal shifts. If your high functioning days become easier to predict, you can plan for them. It's helped me pace myself and avoid some of the burnout from "who knows when I'll have this much energy again?! I gotta do all the things I've been screaming at myself to do!!!"
I meant to say "see if your high functioning days coincide with follicular and/or ovulation days and if your crash days coincide with luteal and/or menstruation phases"
@@lydianicolenorwick125 yeah, I'm literally within hours to a day or two of starting my next cycle, and going out to study today at uni was like someone was scrolling my len's focus in and out every other word. Had to switch topics twice just to get anything meanful done. I just know next week and the week after I'll finally finish that assignment I've been putting off for months, write up my rountine on my "freshly" line painted white board (I painted the lines two weeks ago), get my sewing projects (mostly) completed, get halfway through my library books and maybe actually remember to drink more water. We shall see....
I'm honestly surprised my doctor hasn't falsely diagnosed me with Bipolar disorder, cause my ADHD bounces real high during the start of my cycle, almost like hypomania, and the luteal crash is psychically painful cause I'm progammed to be hard on myself for "sloth", which inevitably leads to a depressive shame cycle if I don't do the basic "low functioning" tasks to avoid the worst of burnout (personally, I don't like high or low functioning for any kind of neurodivergence, because HF sounds like accessibility isn't necessary for the most part, only one or two things here and there, and LF sounds like one's needs are so high that your energy or capacity level needs to be completely augmented by external help, when taking both to the extreme black n white perspective as both aspies and some NT tend to).
The best thing for neurodivergence, especially in menstrating women and afabs, whether it's ASD or ADHD, habit stacking works. So on days of lower dopaminergic reception, either due to low stimulus like a day off from work or overworking the day before, having daily rituals for the most automatic functions, such as wake up, go to bed, bowel movement, and the like, a habit can be stacked. For example, when I need to pee, I chug my drink bottle on the way (once my brain allows me to initiate the movements towards the loo) to keep hydrated, and refill once I wash my hands.
I've been trying other, more complex stacks to see how far it can be taken and how well it works, so that once I know how to code Kotlin, I'll have an app up for basically anyone, however it will be most beneficial to NDs. I know habit stacking works, I just need to plan them out better, and I'm hoping that my future app will mitigate that initiation factor for NDs.
Yes! Almost nobody talks about this connection.
This! Since Covid this has been especially noticeable for me. It's like my body has aged a decade in that regard and is trying to do some early menopausal hormone nonsense. I'm taking a supplement now that helps balance out my days better. I'm still unavoidably blah a day or two before my period and manic the first couple days after, but not to the point of crippling depression or overpromising myself to others like I was before I started.
I genuinely have not felt so validated as I do from this video.
So relatable. I recently moved abroad and everything related to getting us to be cozy and comfortable is my job for one more month.
So I basically fuck around for four hours then work hard until 1 or 2am. Then I get sick.
So I know the unproductive days are definitely a built in cheat code to not get overwhelmed.
I have ADHD and a productive day for me is reading books to learn new things
Not me being stuck in the executive dysfunction/paralysis state for the last days, and today I cleaned from when I got home from work like- 2h without a single break 😂
I felt this deep in my bones. I can go to an aquarium, a zoo, then go out for dinner, drive 6 hours all in one day and be fine. Even the next day. But as soon as I clean the house, start on a todo list, and even think about exercise… and not even finish cleaning.. I need a 6 hour nap, and I don’t eat until 10pm the next day.
that handful of grapes makes all the difference in my mind 😭
Noooo🎉 cheese string , baseboards, doomscrolling & napping!!! Are you freaking kidding me??!!!! This ENTIRE short is EXACTLY MY LIFE! I thought I was genuinely losing my mind… this is so relieving boo. Thank you so much ❤
Balance in all things.
Hahaha!!!! This IS our balance???
The feeling of accomplishment that rushes over me when I do all my chores on those few productive days makes me feel like the happiest person on earth I swear-
So true that when you overdo it, you don’t move for days afterwards
this makes me feel so validated 😭😭
I feel like I live in the 2nd type of days whenever I don’t take my meds 😥 I know that’s what the meds are for, but it’s still frustrating having so much to do and feeling stuck
I'm like "I'm so glad I don’t get burnt out" but I think I'm just good at ignoring it. Being disgnosed later in life is weird.
This.
Still undiagnosed, and I'm in a perpetual state of burnout. Goes both ways.
I needed to see this. I definitely had the second type of day today. I love your videos btw!
Ha, me too!! 😂🙈🤣 I ended it with a headache, too…but I got hot chocolate, so all’s well. 😂☺️
@@Joyfillied headaches are the worst. I'm glad it ended well
Started my day with a headache. Yesterday was a well-organized morning with many items ticked off my to do list. Felt so happy and good about it. Then around 5pm I was so tired and unmotivated. Today I had a therapy session, then made a simple breakfast for my son and me. After that, nothing. Tried to get motivated, but only got depressed instead. Feeling like nothing will ever get better.😢 I know there will be better days, but can't I just string together one week without feeling this way?
Yeah, twice a month I'll get that burst of energy to be productive, clean the house, laundry. The rest of the month is zero motivation and constantly forgetting wet laundry in the washer.
This is sooooo relatable! It's like one day you feel like you can take on the world and your full of energy and get lots of stuff done! But then the next day you can't do anything besides sleep and doom scroll!
"And a...handful of grapes!" is super relatable. 😂
Relatable. Yesterday: went to a collage, did a music project, practiced piano and went for a walk. Today: been in bed all day LOL.
The last part is why I always have saltines and goldfish with me at all times. 😂
I feel slightly traumatized by this. Too real...😂
One of my biggest wishes in life is to be able to have two productive days in a row without being under a deadline and hyper focusing for days on end to the detriment of everything that has nothing to do with the deadline.
... Why is that me? I did all of nothing all day Sunday (I kinda crashed at night and may or may not have had an anxiety attack) and most of Monday, after a very tired (not tiring, just tired) week, until I suddenly got a burst of motivation and energy to do EVERYTHING in the evening (getting and putting away the groceries, doing the dishes, cleaning floors and other surfaces, doing the bedsheets, organising my drawers, desk, and shelves, folding and putting away my clean laundry that has been on the rack for the past week, sorting the dirty laundry to do the next day because it was too late to do immediately, showering, prepping for the next day, etc.). My room was cleaner than it had been in WEEKS, if not months, and the next morning was wonderfully productive yet relaxed... I hope this keeps up but I already know it won't.
That burst of energy and motivation comes with repercussions.
So relatable! Esp the getting up to pee thing... There's so much I always thought was just me, turns out I'm neurospicy af. Found out just before I was 50. Wow
Me too. I'm 42, I haven't been diagnosed, except for depression,but I know that I have had this my whole life. I hate having a bladder! Lol. I get the pee thing too. Most peeps don't. Until today I was the only one who said this to my friends and they think I'm weird. It's just what I do. But I'm not alone. And I like that.
Came for you.
Stayed for the dog
(And yes. The one day on, one day off, thing, is so true.)
I feel so indicated by this! I’m not alone.
The not stand up to even pee until it hurts is scarily accurate, help.
I had one of the productive days today
I had a cheese string and a handful of grapes is so accurate it hurts
I FELT this so HARD!!!! Sums up my days nicely
I think of this as “god mode.”
It also stands to reason that, as I am not a god, I cannot reasonably expect to be in god mode all the, or even all that frequently, as prolonged spells of god mode can, in fact, ravage my mortal form and leave me devoid of energy for the next three to five business weeks.
'Even had time for a bath today'...yep!
I am like this at work. At work I'm always killing and going above and beyond. But on the weekends I can't even get up from bed. I can't even socialize outside of work.
I'm burned out for so long by my high-productivity days that it's really not a good trade-off lmao, I'm trying to find ways to just do a little bit every day instead (not that it helps the burnout when I do have a hyperfixation day, but at least I'm trying to not depend on those days to get anything done) 🙃
This. Is so painfully relatable.
“i even had time for a bath” is so real
This is so relatable it hurts
The dog 🐕 must be thinking why she is talking to herself 😂
Laughed out loud. Can barely do anything today. Yesterday was a 'clean the house' type of day. Low battery. The grapes need to be bought but I was definitely contemplating the shops.
You just described my entire life in less than a minute
I have rewatched this so many times.
You’re going STRAIGHT to my favorites!
This is so true and anyone who says it isn't can keep their opinion to themselfs
This is so accurate that I will be filing a police report on you for having hidden cameras in my house
How? Why? THE ACCURACY is INCREDIBLE!
I’m still proud of you for the day before. That is a huge accomplishment and you deserve some recovery time.
I am getting to a place in my head where I just accept if I'm in stop or go. I'm not judging it anymore. I don't look at stop as something bad for myself and everyone, I don't look at go as always the setting I should be on, I've decided both presentations of me are fine. (I'm 49. I hope the rest of you take less time to see how amazing you are regardless of which mode you're in.)
Yesssss!!! The day of being usper productive that is burns tou out so much you cant even move the next day!
Wow! Thank you for sharing this. I can totally relate!
This is me but I get productive for weeks then I lose steam for about 2-3 weeks and cycle again.
So true. The abdominal pain from having to pee is what always makes me cave in. Then it's cheese stick time. But sometimes I'll just settle for scraps I find in my room
Some of these videos are eerie as I swear I'm looking in a mirror.
Your videos are so relatable I feel the need to consult a doctor 😅
Dang same. But wow a string cheese AND some grapes?!? I just get one huge bowl of chips so I don’t have to get up more then I need to
This is so relatable that it hurts!
The cheese string and handful of grapes is so accurate
This is so accurate I’m gonna check my place for hidden cams tonight
This is so accurate.... It hurts my soul 😂
i’ve just been bouncing between these two scenarios for the past week of winter break lmao
The more I see videos on adhd or autism, I’m starting to believe I’ve gone my whole life undiagnosed with one of the 2 cuz it explains sooooooo much about me.
Which would be ironic cuz as kids we teased my brother cuz we taught he was autistic, even though he was never diagnosed.
Well my sister is the same way so what are the odds of all 3 kids having something 😂😂😂😂😂
This is why I try not to overwork my body and mind when I have those days 😂
This video just reminded me I haven't checked my homework to do list for like 5 days
You help me understand my adhd partner so well, thank you!😊
"I had a cheese string" 😂 lmfao been there