Just a melon riffing about confidence and self-improvement. =================================== Follow your melon: Twitter: / theneedledrop Instagram: @afantano FB: / theneedledrop
After watching this video, I now have enough confidence to stop buying ridge wallets. Even though my family will be executed as a result. Tell my family I love them, Anthony.
I'll be real, this is going to be ranty. I'm sure no one's gonna really care, but Anthony's new video about confidence really hit me hard. I come from an extremely small town in West Virginia, a small, quiet state in its own right. My whole life, I've not really been to many places, or seen many things. I always confided in the nature around me. I've lived in the same house my entire life--I'm an adult now. I live right beside some mountains and a creek. Not much around me but my sleepy little town. My father's a college graduate and a law school graduate from Louisiana, and my mother's works in law. They chose to homeschool me--although I did do extracurricular, and had plenty of real life friends. They taught me about hard work. About trying as hard as you can for something. Due to some really bad relationships, and always trying to be selfless and the nice guy, I was stepped on. Being an open book with friends gave me trust issues, because the moment anyone turned on me, they pushed my buttons and knew what would hurt me. I shut down usually and just gave up. Writing, RUclips and gaming is where I found my stride, true. But what I found my true passion in was music. From all rounds of the spectrum, it touched me. Good music, bad music, music of all sorts. I related to some, hated others. But it taught me others felt this way. Then I discovered people like Anthony Fantano and Coverkillernation. I watched them for years. I was reclusive, I pushed people away, and I struggled with depression and anxiety. They were my escape. They were what gave me feeling that something I loved was being talked about, even if we didn't agree. Anthony was so bubbly. He was weird, in a good way. He wore hats sometimes, I loved his flannels, I loved Cal, I loved his diversity. He brought me so much joy. I'd always smile with him, laugh with him, frown with him. I'd be personally impacted, only because it was taking me away from the reality that lied beyond the chair I was sitting in when I watched his videos. In early 2018, I had hit rock bottom. One of my closest friends had taken their own life, a group of friends I'd had for literally a decade dumped me. I felt like I wasn't living up to the expectations of my family. My health wasn't doing very well. I was constantly hit with panic attacks and depressive fits. I didn't want to do things I used to love. It was also around the time that I dislocated my kneecap, so I was in a lot of pain. In January 2018, I thought about taking my own life. I planned it out, I thought of how. I wanted it to be painless--I'm afraid of pain. I was more afraid of living, because every day I knew better than to be so unhappy, but I was bedecked by so much dread and unhappiness. I felt like society and everyone around me was pushing me to become something I wasn't. To put on a smile every time I felt like frowning. And if I didn't, immediately trying to push me into therapy, into medication, or saying it was "all in my head." What saved me was my best friend, Matias, who's like the sibling I never had. That, and RUclips and Music. I was in so much pain. But I lived. My anxiety was still at an all time high. It'd be boiling awhile. I self-deprecated, as well. I hated the way I looked, talked, felt. I felt like I was disgustingly ugly, that my voice was too chirpy. I felt like no one ever cared about what I was or who I was. With my best friend, he urged me to try doing some videos. My commentary was stiff so I didn't. Then, he said we could do some together. So we did. We made some gaming videos. I did that for a bit, and I was terrified. I'd shake behind the camera--too afraid to show myself. My heart rate would go up, and my chest would get tight every time I stopped recording. I'd have to ring myself back into reality. Eventually, I changed. I decided I wanted to do music reviews. I didn't know how, or why, or what of. I just knew I cared about it. So I did. I knew it was an oversaturated niche, so no one would care. I wouldn't have to worry about it. Eventually, I got prideful enough to get on camera. I did reviews of some CDS I had--older ones, not new releases, that took awhile. I actually got a few views! Friends and new people were watching. Not many, maybe 3, 4 or 5 at the most. But I kept doing it. I did it for a YEAR. Throughout 2018, with a shitty webcam and a gaming headset, I talked about music, new and old. I did lists. I had a bad sleep schedule, so one week in Summer, I did 25-30 minute long video oriented lists for 7 days straight. No one watched. I loved making them. They made me feel more comfortable, slowly. These videos were my outlet to be me. No one could tell me what to say, or how to act, or what to wear. I could wear weird hats, whatever shirt I wanted, have my hair up or down or spikey. It was MY video. It was MY channel. And then...something happened. I had been working some side jobs for money, and I took a plunge. One that would change my life forever. I decided to buy a fairly expensive camera & lighting. 450 dollar camera and a 35 dollar 3 prong lamp. I set up an area with my CDS, some decor, and began making videos. I was so much more confident. I was speaking with passion and power. And best of all? I KNEW someone was on the other side of that camera. I knew SOMEONE was watching. My day had been made better by people like Fantano and Coverkillernation, especially Anthony, and so I wondered if maybe someday, I'd help someone's day be a little bit better just by being me. Mid 2018, I changed my name from J Morris to J Morris the Review Guy. I felt PROUD of it. It was my brand, and I could do with it what I wanted. I loved it. I loved every second of it. People like Anthony inspired me to be myself, and not fit in. To be weird, to be eccentric, and to not be afraid of any of it. All because I saw TheNeedleDrop and Coverkillernation reviewing some music I enjoyed, it saved my life. It made me a different person. Now? I'm nearing 2,000 subscribers and 70,000 views. I have a loyal, dedicated fanbase of people that care. I'm extremely confident, and I no longer have chest pain or shake when I have to record. I SMILE when I have to record, because I know I might make someone's day better. I might just save someone's life. Or if nothing else, inform someone or entertain them from their own world for a bit. And what more could I ask for? Deadass I'm tearing up writing this, lol. RUclips made me a bigger person. Thank you to Matias, my best friend. Thank you to Anthony. Thank you to Coverkillernation. Thank you all for making me a better me than I am. I wish you all luck. Be yourself. Don't be afraid to take risks and embrace yourself. Even if it feels impossible, try. There's nothing worse than never trying. You can improve anything with work. Have a great day, all. :) Cheers.
He’s right about all of this👍 it’s a slow burn but if you keep tackling new things you will look back and not only see that you have done some dope stuff, but now you literally KNOW you can do it. That’s what confidence is, knowing that you can do the thing. Competence creates confidence👍
I've done most of what you've said and built myself up from being a loser to someone who's building a better life. But people still terrify me. Talking to them, dealing with them, expressing my personality. It's hard. Every new person makes me anxious. I can't start or hold conversations. My brain just locks up. I can't even Express my personality around my family. That's the last thing I can't figure out
Occasionally write down / list your accomplishments. Physically manifesting and seeing all the things you have done really helps. (even things as small as updating your resume or learning how to cook a new dish). 💙
Currently in a band and we’re getting gigs now and good feedback, walk everywhere when I can and currently losing weight (lost 20 pounds so far), making an effort to drink more water than fizzy drinks, have a loving boyfriend, wrote a book (not published), learned the drums fairly quickly and working on learning how to play the piano, made an effort in the last few years to save money and I’ve saved a lot now, this year and last I’ve read 75 books so far, currently learning Swedish at a steady pace as I’m doing with all the things I’ve mentioned here, deleted all my social media accounts and yet I don’t feel any different than I did before all that. Don’t feel any different with anxiety, stress, depression, confidence and self esteem after years of working on these things. I come across this advice all the time about getting yourself out there, doing things, focus on projects. I am doing it all and yet I don’t feel any different. I’m trying but nothing seems to be changing for me mentally so I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I suppose it’s all well and good when the person giving this advice is successful but all this tells me is that it got better for you and you got lucky. I don’t mean to sound insulting and if I do, I apologise. I know failure is part of the process and so on. I have experienced it however none of this has boosted my confidence at all.
Thanks Anthony, most everything you said really related to my situation right now. I just started a new job and I’m really lacking confidence in myself right now. It’s almost like I was meant to watch this video at this specific moment. This made a world of difference.
On the topic of accomplishing intimidating tasks, I use a strategy I learned to make racing 5Ks, half-marathons, and marathons easier. I’ll pick a landmark that’s between 50-75 meters away, say a street sign, and I’ll tell myself “I’m going to run to that street sign”. When I get to that street sign, I’ll find another landmark, maybe a tree or something, and I’ll tell myself “I’m going to run to that tree”. Rinse, dry, repeat, until I finish the race. Basically, I’m breaking up an extremely intimidating task into multiple small and unintimidating tasks. For me, this works for any large project.
The advice about aspiring to be like the people who impress you is so true. Mimicking the socially competent and confident people around me is how I got where I am now.
People talk a lot about dreams and aspirations, but not much about responsibility. I think we all know what our duties and responsibilities are and by neglecting those, we lose any chance at achieving our dreams and aspirations.
I feel like saying “you have to accomplish things to gain confidence” is the reason why most people aren’t confident. I think a lack of confidence often comes from people feeling like they haven’t accomplished anything, and never can. Recognizing your accomplishments is the most important step to believing you can accomplish more! nice video 🤟
all the melon jokes aside, as someone who has been in therapy for years this is very good advice for people stuck in ruts and/or depression. acknowledging you want to change is a good sign you're on your way to being a better person. side note: we need the injury reserve/igor review yesterday melon
Atleast you tried, and now you know she's not interested in you, so now you can go move on and find another one that's gonna be compatible for you? I guess
For me, that small task was something as simple as making my bed every morning. It really does help. Even something that small can make you feel a little better about your room. Then you start taking more care of it since you're already making the bed, might as well make it look nice. Then the whole house/apartment is cleaner. Then that inspires you to maybe practice more self care because you've already kept your space clean, might as well keep your body and mind clean. Then suddenly you're eating better and taking the stairs instead of the elevator. In 6 months to a year, you hardly recognize past you because you really do feel more confident. This was my personal journey. Planting that seed makes you take pride in things that you might not have in the past. And that in turn, as Melon says, lets you look back and see how far you've come and to go further still learning from that. Planting a seed is such a good analogy because every single day builds on the last. Start Small, big things will come.
Yeah well, you put out this video on one of those days where I struggled more than usual with perfectionism-related anxiety, so, thank you. I hope I'll give myself a break soon enough too Much love, my fruity friend
I've been burnt out mentally and almost emotionally lately but seeing this inspiring video from Fantano actually gave me hope and faith that everything will be okay
Another thing I’d say about being the person you would want to have a conversation with is focus on the tangibles like being kind or being honest or listening well. I know for me I would lose my confidence because I held myself to such a high standard of “being funny” or “being cool” and those are things that can’t really be measured and also you can’t be those things while TRYING to be those things so I would end up fucking up and just beating myself up. Thanks for the video sweet boy Anthony!
One thing I would like to add is that beating yourself up can get to the point where you’re not even doing it consciously. A lot of the time we carry disappointments with ourselves and they start to build and really weigh us down. Check in with yourself and go back and think of everything you’re disappointed in yourself about, and mentally forgive yourself. The amount of catharsis I experienced when I did this was enlightening and I hope I can help someone out with this advice.
Album disappointed me, I give it a 6-7 Ritchie bored the hell outta me throughout the whole album. Production carried it in my opinion. Just my opinion though
but seriously. I had no doubts about Anthony being a great person, but this type of videos just shows how much he truly cares. Makes my heart feel warm
breaking news: fantanthony starts a self-help blog EDIT: for real though im a fan of this kinda content, and hearing these opinions from you, separate from your music expertise
I agree. You can't expect to have self-esteem without doing what you think you should do every day. If you are skirting your self-responsibility, not saying what you want to say, and not doing what you want to do EVERY SINGLE DAY, no wonder you feel like you can't do anything in life...cuz you choose not to.
you’re so right anthony, self care is really important! even if I feel reALLy shitty, I try and have a shower, make my bed or just stand outside in the sun for a bit
Today has been my 5th day approaching random girls, giving them a compliment and starting a conversation. I'm overcoming my fear of social anxiety. The beginning is very rough and awkward 😂 but I see some progress and I feel more charismatic now, around the people I already know. I know that if I stick with it, I can overcome this and be the person I've always wanted to be. What ever your _thing_ is, keep going. You got this. 🖤 Thanks, Fantano!
I like the subtle nod at 1:12 to the amazing fact that it has been shown multiple times that plants grow up to 75% faster whilst being played classical music
Just start doing whatever it is that you want to do. I'm terrible for procrastinating and making excuses as to why I'll start tomorrow and I feel like the majority of us can relate to this. Just start TODAY! Seriously. I want to make videos here on YT to help boost my confidence speaking and as a fun pet project and even though I havent begun creating the videos I am currently planning I did put out a few simple videos just so I can practice filming, speaking to a camera, editing etc. What I've found is that now I have a much clearer vision of how and what I want to do, my current videos (GoT reaction videos - I know, original) will probably be privatised eventually when I begin creating what I'm planning to create but making those videos has got the hardest part well and truly out the way, STARTING. So as I said just start today. Even if you feel extremely uncomfortable, out of your depth, silly, whatever it may be just push through that barrier. I've only created a handful of videos and I already find it 10 times easier to speak infront of a camera. At first I found it to be the hardest thing ever, I felt so silly, but you quickly get over that first hurdle.
Well seeing as you asked antnee something I would add is never weigh your self esteem on what other people think of you. Don't get me wrong, definitely use the praise and critiques from others as feedback to help your self development. But accomplishing the good and awesome things you want to do should be the end goal itself, not the praise. Honestly I found it incredibly liberating after I took this lesson to heart
No expert but consistently putting yourself in progressively more uncomfortable situations (social or physical), and then overcoming them, definitely helps you to get used to the fight/flight social anxiety when it eventually strikes in day-to-day life. Often people stay well in their comfort zone which has negative long term effects on self-esteem. Skateboarding, martial arts or even something like yoga would work fine...
Oh yeah, and work on eye contact, gradually - if you usually struggle: challenge yourself to hold for slightly longer than you'd normally be comfortable with. Allowing yourself to be perceived as more confident than you are at least gives you a sense of security when in social scenarios and not enough can be said for what it does to self-esteem long term. Your comfort zone is not your friend!
I’m glad you mentioned having good diet/exercise and social life. I feel those areas become overlooked when obtaining confidence and just a overall content/happy mood. Also hearing you say to distance yourself from social media reminded me to think that I’m not really missing on anything if i do so. Thanks melon
Another thing about confidence know your worth and don’t let other people negative opinion affect you it’s just an opinion don’t let them project their fears on you always put yourself on a a mountain top don’t ever let anyone take you down from it
Thank you. Not going lie, this video has come at an werdily good time, confidence is something I've been struggling with. I've just turned 20 and I'm feeling like I've already been waisting my life. There's a lot of little things eating away at me, making me unproductive and anxious. I feel like i have an idea of where to start now. Thanks Mellon
Hey Jedwards, MAJOR thank you for this obscure comment!! I checked these fellas out and I really like them! I'm a fan of all kinds of Aussie psych rock + reggae outfits and I'm shocked these guys flew under my radar, Cheers!
what an absolutely lovely suprise! i really enjoyed this video, i understand your main focus is music but you should definitely make more of these in the future!
I agree: build self-esteem by self-expansion, grit and practice. Develop skills and good habits, rather than blowing yourself up with hot air, like so many self-help gurus advise. And the mistakes on the journey serve to temper self-confidence with humility, so one doesn't end up being a self-satisfied pain in the arse.
I think you have some really good points here, but in general for me at least, i’ve heard a lot of these points a million and one times, so i’m feeling a light to decent 5
damn melon. i am 24 now, and i wish i could send this video back in time to when i was 20 or so. still have no idea what I'm really doing but am feeling much more confident (forever) in taking precautions to ensure it turns out the best way possible. love you
Look, Fantano, I know that Blue is your favourite Weezer album, but you didn't have to upload a video telling me how to be confident just as I was listening to Pinkerton of all albums. I'm watching you, Melon.
Confidence. Faith in yourself. Faith doesn’t necessitate logic and reason, only will. Confidence is nothing more than the will to believe in yourself, regardless. Will can be hard to summon in hard times. Don’t be afraid of that difficulty; embrace it. Because when you summon will at your weakest, you begin the very track record of success that enhances the confidence your will begins.
Thank you for this. I just had my first attempt at teaching (my own rookie class in college, it was a 60min project done with 4 other colleagues from the same class) and I couldn’t speak up loud enough, or make my point across without doubling down on something I just explained, it was very rough because I could see their facial expressions crying for me to speak louder and hear jokes about my first time teaching... I can go to class today feeling a lot better about myself now because of your reminder that failure is a part of the process, thank you
Confidence is a slippery eel to acquire and maintain! Despite appearances, you will find that your heroes, your inspirations, and the people who have changed your life struggle with many of the same problems that you do. Matters tend to look neater and nicer from an outside perspective. Try to understand and be kind :)
When Melon isn't doing album reviews he's building my self esteem. Thank you Anthony.
Tha Swami igor igor igorr
@@gilbert2567 IGOR IGOR IGOR
2-D AHHHHH
You mean when he isn‘t formig your opinion
Stfu
After watching this video, I now have enough confidence to stop buying ridge wallets. Even though my family will be executed as a result. Tell my family I love them, Anthony.
Ryan Javier you know his melon finger was hovering over the heart button before he read the bit about your family.
Such wholesome content from such a wholesome melon. Keep it up Anthony 👍🏼
Dadthony Ineverhantano 😢
@@hellicars giving wisdom Charlesthony Xaviertano
👌🏼
I struggle with depression and being confident and I'm glad you dropped this video, Anthony.
Mee too
Nassir J hopefully you get better :)
@@maxexodus thanks bro. Hope u get better too
Me too! We can do it! It’s all in our heads.
Relatable, have a nice day.
I'll be real, this is going to be ranty. I'm sure no one's gonna really care, but Anthony's new video about confidence really hit me hard.
I come from an extremely small town in West Virginia, a small, quiet state in its own right. My whole life, I've not really been to many places, or seen many things. I always confided in the nature around me. I've lived in the same house my entire life--I'm an adult now. I live right beside some mountains and a creek. Not much around me but my sleepy little town.
My father's a college graduate and a law school graduate from Louisiana, and my mother's works in law. They chose to homeschool me--although I did do extracurricular, and had plenty of real life friends. They taught me about hard work. About trying as hard as you can for something.
Due to some really bad relationships, and always trying to be selfless and the nice guy, I was stepped on. Being an open book with friends gave me trust issues, because the moment anyone turned on me, they pushed my buttons and knew what would hurt me. I shut down usually and just gave up.
Writing, RUclips and gaming is where I found my stride, true. But what I found my true passion in was music. From all rounds of the spectrum, it touched me. Good music, bad music, music of all sorts. I related to some, hated others. But it taught me others felt this way.
Then I discovered people like Anthony Fantano and Coverkillernation. I watched them for years. I was reclusive, I pushed people away, and I struggled with depression and anxiety. They were my escape. They were what gave me feeling that something I loved was being talked about, even if we didn't agree. Anthony was so bubbly. He was weird, in a good way. He wore hats sometimes, I loved his flannels, I loved Cal, I loved his diversity. He brought me so much joy. I'd always smile with him, laugh with him, frown with him. I'd be personally impacted, only because it was taking me away from the reality that lied beyond the chair I was sitting in when I watched his videos.
In early 2018, I had hit rock bottom. One of my closest friends had taken their own life, a group of friends I'd had for literally a decade dumped me. I felt like I wasn't living up to the expectations of my family. My health wasn't doing very well. I was constantly hit with panic attacks and depressive fits. I didn't want to do things I used to love. It was also around the time that I dislocated my kneecap, so I was in a lot of pain.
In January 2018, I thought about taking my own life.
I planned it out, I thought of how. I wanted it to be painless--I'm afraid of pain. I was more afraid of living, because every day I knew better than to be so unhappy, but I was bedecked by so much dread and unhappiness. I felt like society and everyone around me was pushing me to become something I wasn't. To put on a smile every time I felt like frowning. And if I didn't, immediately trying to push me into therapy, into medication, or saying it was "all in my head."
What saved me was my best friend, Matias, who's like the sibling I never had. That, and RUclips and Music.
I was in so much pain. But I lived. My anxiety was still at an all time high. It'd be boiling awhile. I self-deprecated, as well. I hated the way I looked, talked, felt. I felt like I was disgustingly ugly, that my voice was too chirpy. I felt like no one ever cared about what I was or who I was.
With my best friend, he urged me to try doing some videos. My commentary was stiff so I didn't. Then, he said we could do some together. So we did. We made some gaming videos. I did that for a bit, and I was terrified. I'd shake behind the camera--too afraid to show myself. My heart rate would go up, and my chest would get tight every time I stopped recording. I'd have to ring myself back into reality.
Eventually, I changed. I decided I wanted to do music reviews. I didn't know how, or why, or what of. I just knew I cared about it. So I did. I knew it was an oversaturated niche, so no one would care. I wouldn't have to worry about it.
Eventually, I got prideful enough to get on camera. I did reviews of some CDS I had--older ones, not new releases, that took awhile. I actually got a few views! Friends and new people were watching. Not many, maybe 3, 4 or 5 at the most.
But I kept doing it. I did it for a YEAR. Throughout 2018, with a shitty webcam and a gaming headset, I talked about music, new and old. I did lists. I had a bad sleep schedule, so one week in Summer, I did 25-30 minute long video oriented lists for 7 days straight. No one watched. I loved making them.
They made me feel more comfortable, slowly. These videos were my outlet to be me. No one could tell me what to say, or how to act, or what to wear. I could wear weird hats, whatever shirt I wanted, have my hair up or down or spikey. It was MY video. It was MY channel.
And then...something happened.
I had been working some side jobs for money, and I took a plunge. One that would change my life forever.
I decided to buy a fairly expensive camera & lighting. 450 dollar camera and a 35 dollar 3 prong lamp. I set up an area with my CDS, some decor, and began making videos. I was so much more confident. I was speaking with passion and power. And best of all? I KNEW someone was on the other side of that camera. I knew SOMEONE was watching. My day had been made better by people like Fantano and Coverkillernation, especially Anthony, and so I wondered if maybe someday, I'd help someone's day be a little bit better just by being me.
Mid 2018, I changed my name from J Morris to J Morris the Review Guy. I felt PROUD of it. It was my brand, and I could do with it what I wanted. I loved it. I loved every second of it. People like Anthony inspired me to be myself, and not fit in. To be weird, to be eccentric, and to not be afraid of any of it. All because I saw TheNeedleDrop and Coverkillernation reviewing some music I enjoyed, it saved my life. It made me a different person.
Now? I'm nearing 2,000 subscribers and 70,000 views. I have a loyal, dedicated fanbase of people that care. I'm extremely confident, and I no longer have chest pain or shake when I have to record. I SMILE when I have to record, because I know I might make someone's day better. I might just save someone's life. Or if nothing else, inform someone or entertain them from their own world for a bit. And what more could I ask for?
Deadass I'm tearing up writing this, lol.
RUclips made me a bigger person. Thank you to Matias, my best friend. Thank you to Anthony. Thank you to Coverkillernation. Thank you all for making me a better me than I am.
I wish you all luck. Be yourself. Don't be afraid to take risks and embrace yourself. Even if it feels impossible, try. There's nothing worse than never trying. You can improve anything with work. Have a great day, all. :) Cheers.
hope you're still doing well my dude ;)
Just wrapped up reading, thank you for typing this and for embracing your passion. I'm very glad you've found joy in doing your thing, keep it up!
This was a beautiful read. I'm very happy for you!
Melon gains confidence by putting down his little brother Logic.
Best comment!
Lmao
"everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days"
- Hanthony Montano
🤣🤣🤣
Lol😂
Reviewer, vegan chef blogger, wallet salesman, and now life coach?
What else can this man do?
You forgot professional fruit impersonator ☝️
I mean he can be racist
review igor
And meme lord
The Donald Glover of RUclips
He ain't lying. I don't know anyone else who would be confident enough to wear that shirt in public.
The melons are clean
The reviews are mean
But most importantly
The goals are self esteem
...ffuuucccckkkk
"Start by cleaning your room." -Anthony B. Fantanerson
Man.. No matter the subject, fantano can speak on it with such eloquence.
Totally agree. Eventhough some of his review scores make me wanna punch babies, I like hearing his thoughts in general.✨👀👌🏾
I learnt more from a melon in 9 minutes than my father in 19 years
Ahahahahahahshah
My confidence in myself is NOT GOOD
badbadnotgood
ur not alone my man
I rate this a broken marriage out of ten
6:27 Hanthony Montano
Confidence in yourself is given to you by those around you. You can't magic up confidence out of thin air.
I feel personally called out right now, thank you for this video
same
He’s right about all of this👍 it’s a slow burn but if you keep tackling new things you will look back and not only see that you have done some dope stuff, but now you literally KNOW you can do it. That’s what confidence is, knowing that you can do the thing. Competence creates confidence👍
I see that the melon is slowly gaining the confidence to review IGOR
9
He’s literally wearing melon colors while building my self esteem, thank u talking melon🙂
The step he didn't mention was to buy a nice, sleek, minimalist wallet
I've done most of what you've said and built myself up from being a loser to someone who's building a better life. But people still terrify me. Talking to them, dealing with them, expressing my personality. It's hard. Every new person makes me anxious. I can't start or hold conversations. My brain just locks up. I can't even Express my personality around my family. That's the last thing I can't figure out
Occasionally write down / list your accomplishments. Physically manifesting and seeing all the things you have done really helps. (even things as small as updating your resume or learning how to cook a new dish). 💙
Wow, I actually really needed a video like this. Straightforward and honest. Thanks melon :)
Yo I wonder if anyone is going to talk about him reviewing IGOR hahaha that would be so funny!
haha melons!!!!!!!11 XDDD
That would be so epic/funny xd
@Jeremy 03 that would be quite quirky
Currently in a band and we’re getting gigs now and good feedback, walk everywhere when I can and currently losing weight (lost 20 pounds so far), making an effort to drink more water than fizzy drinks, have a loving boyfriend, wrote a book (not published), learned the drums fairly quickly and working on learning how to play the piano, made an effort in the last few years to save money and I’ve saved a lot now, this year and last I’ve read 75 books so far, currently learning Swedish at a steady pace as I’m doing with all the things I’ve mentioned here, deleted all my social media accounts and yet I don’t feel any different than I did before all that. Don’t feel any different with anxiety, stress, depression, confidence and self esteem after years of working on these things.
I come across this advice all the time about getting yourself out there, doing things, focus on projects. I am doing it all and yet I don’t feel any different. I’m trying but nothing seems to be changing for me mentally so I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I suppose it’s all well and good when the person giving this advice is successful but all this tells me is that it got better for you and you got lucky. I don’t mean to sound insulting and if I do, I apologise. I know failure is part of the process and so on. I have experienced it however none of this has boosted my confidence at all.
Thanks Anthony, most everything you said really related to my situation right now. I just started a new job and I’m really lacking confidence in myself right now. It’s almost like I was meant to watch this video at this specific moment. This made a world of difference.
On the topic of accomplishing intimidating tasks, I use a strategy I learned to make racing 5Ks, half-marathons, and marathons easier. I’ll pick a landmark that’s between 50-75 meters away, say a street sign, and I’ll tell myself “I’m going to run to that street sign”. When I get to that street sign, I’ll find another landmark, maybe a tree or something, and I’ll tell myself “I’m going to run to that tree”. Rinse, dry, repeat, until I finish the race. Basically, I’m breaking up an extremely intimidating task into multiple small and unintimidating tasks. For me, this works for any large project.
The advice about aspiring to be like the people who impress you is so true. Mimicking the socially competent and confident people around me is how I got where I am now.
People talk a lot about dreams and aspirations, but not much about responsibility. I think we all know what our duties and responsibilities are and by neglecting those, we lose any chance at achieving our dreams and aspirations.
Thank you Jordthony Peterstano.
the birds chirping in the background really makes this 10X more inspirational
You seamlessly transition from being genuine to memey throughout the video 🍉
Look at melons hair. He still comes out like he has normal human hair. Everyone can do everything
I needed this today. Thank you Anthony
Anthony needs to review your damn profile pic
I feel like saying “you have to accomplish things to gain confidence” is the reason why most people aren’t confident. I think a lack of confidence often comes from people feeling like they haven’t accomplished anything, and never can. Recognizing your accomplishments is the most important step to believing you can accomplish more! nice video 🤟
“such a nice day today”
Look outside and it’s pouring rain
Very nice indeed
JAJCoMedy Anthony is so stupid sometimes, he doesn’t know how to read the weather!
Rain is good
all the melon jokes aside, as someone who has been in therapy for years this is very good advice for people stuck in ruts and/or depression. acknowledging you want to change is a good sign you're on your way to being a better person. side note: we need the injury reserve/igor review yesterday melon
melon this video helped me work up the courage and confidence to ask my crush out !!
edit: she said no
We all experience rejection.
Hey, at least you had the guts to ask her out in the first place. That's still some big dick energy right there.
Atleast you tried, and now you know she's not interested in you, so now you can go move on and find another one that's gonna be compatible for you? I guess
For me, that small task was something as simple as making my bed every morning. It really does help. Even something that small can make you feel a little better about your room. Then you start taking more care of it since you're already making the bed, might as well make it look nice. Then the whole house/apartment is cleaner. Then that inspires you to maybe practice more self care because you've already kept your space clean, might as well keep your body and mind clean. Then suddenly you're eating better and taking the stairs instead of the elevator. In 6 months to a year, you hardly recognize past you because you really do feel more confident. This was my personal journey. Planting that seed makes you take pride in things that you might not have in the past. And that in turn, as Melon says, lets you look back and see how far you've come and to go further still learning from that. Planting a seed is such a good analogy because every single day builds on the last. Start Small, big things will come.
Yeah well, you put out this video on one of those days where I struggled more than usual with perfectionism-related anxiety, so,
thank you.
I hope I'll give myself a break soon enough too
Much love, my fruity friend
Being accepting of failure is key. Failure hurts but dont let that stop you from trying again.
I've been burnt out mentally and almost emotionally lately but seeing this inspiring video from Fantano actually gave me hope and faith that everything will be okay
Another thing I’d say about being the person you would want to have a conversation with is focus on the tangibles like being kind or being honest or listening well. I know for me I would lose my confidence because I held myself to such a high standard of “being funny” or “being cool” and those are things that can’t really be measured and also you can’t be those things while TRYING to be those things so I would end up fucking up and just beating myself up. Thanks for the video sweet boy Anthony!
I’m confident enough to believe you won’t upload the IGOR review
Stop bitching
Kael Forsythe-Barker No u
Kael Forsythe-Barker No u
Kael Forsythe-Barker no u
Poketh I’m confident enough to believe that man united are not gonna win the premier league next season
One thing I would like to add is that beating yourself up can get to the point where you’re not even doing it consciously. A lot of the time we carry disappointments with ourselves and they start to build and really weigh us down. Check in with yourself and go back and think of everything you’re disappointed in yourself about, and mentally forgive yourself. The amount of catharsis I experienced when I did this was enlightening and I hope I can help someone out with this advice.
Yo thanks dude. I know your community meme's you and all but I'm pretty sure deep down they appreciate you more than they even realize
just when i’m down bad again fantanos vids come back in my recommended
I'm confident that Injury Reserve will be >= a light 8
Bill C.I.A. Wilson AOTY
Album disappointed me, I give it a 6-7 Ritchie bored the hell outta me throughout the whole album. Production carried it in my opinion. Just my opinion though
@@ok-xo3ot we just gon forget about Igor? Aight cool
but seriously. I had no doubts about Anthony being a great person, but this type of videos just shows how much he truly cares. Makes my heart feel warm
breaking news: fantanthony starts a self-help blog
EDIT: for real though im a fan of this kinda content, and hearing these opinions from you, separate from your music expertise
I'd love that honestly
Flame Beats rest in power Tai Lopez
I agree. You can't expect to have self-esteem without doing what you think you should do every day. If you are skirting your self-responsibility, not saying what you want to say, and not doing what you want to do EVERY SINGLE DAY, no wonder you feel like you can't do anything in life...cuz you choose not to.
I agree that listening to Failure is essential to the process.
hahahahahahaha very underrated comment
Very underrated at that, truely a A-grade level music nerd joke
you’re so right anthony, self care is really important! even if I feel reALLy shitty, I try and have a shower, make my bed or just stand outside in the sun for a bit
melon should start a health/self-improvement series
Today has been my 5th day approaching random girls, giving them a compliment and starting a conversation. I'm overcoming my fear of social anxiety.
The beginning is very rough and awkward 😂 but I see some progress and I feel more charismatic now, around the people I already know.
I know that if I stick with it, I can overcome this and be the person I've always wanted to be. What ever your _thing_ is, keep going. You got this. 🖤
Thanks, Fantano!
Your professor really said “This project... It’s NOT GOOD”
I like the subtle nod at 1:12 to the amazing fact that it has been shown multiple times that plants grow up to 75% faster whilst being played classical music
Thanks melon, you have convinced me that i can in fact become a dictator, i finally believe in myself thanks to your advice.
Just start doing whatever it is that you want to do. I'm terrible for procrastinating and making excuses as to why I'll start tomorrow and I feel like the majority of us can relate to this. Just start TODAY! Seriously. I want to make videos here on YT to help boost my confidence speaking and as a fun pet project and even though I havent begun creating the videos I am currently planning I did put out a few simple videos just so I can practice filming, speaking to a camera, editing etc.
What I've found is that now I have a much clearer vision of how and what I want to do, my current videos (GoT reaction videos - I know, original) will probably be privatised eventually when I begin creating what I'm planning to create but making those videos has got the hardest part well and truly out the way, STARTING. So as I said just start today. Even if you feel extremely uncomfortable, out of your depth, silly, whatever it may be just push through that barrier. I've only created a handful of videos and I already find it 10 times easier to speak infront of a camera. At first I found it to be the hardest thing ever, I felt so silly, but you quickly get over that first hurdle.
Great advice Anthony but I’m too busy trying to figure out if it’s a 2, a 3 or a “?” on your shirt to appreciate the knowledge you’re giving me
judging by the number on the shoulder it’s probably a 2
Well seeing as you asked antnee something I would add is never weigh your self esteem on what other people think of you. Don't get me wrong, definitely use the praise and critiques from others as feedback to help your self development. But accomplishing the good and awesome things you want to do should be the end goal itself, not the praise.
Honestly I found it incredibly liberating after I took this lesson to heart
Melon going from music reviews to straight up life advice
Cusionmon this kind of content wasn’t uncommon in the whatistheplan days
No expert but consistently putting yourself in progressively more uncomfortable situations (social or physical), and then overcoming them, definitely helps you to get used to the fight/flight social anxiety when it eventually strikes in day-to-day life. Often people stay well in their comfort zone which has negative long term effects on self-esteem. Skateboarding, martial arts or even something like yoga would work fine...
Oh yeah, and work on eye contact, gradually - if you usually struggle: challenge yourself to hold for slightly longer than you'd normally be comfortable with. Allowing yourself to be perceived as more confident than you are at least gives you a sense of security when in social scenarios and not enough can be said for what it does to self-esteem long term. Your comfort zone is not your friend!
Thank you for this anthony. Most of the advice I've gotten about confidence has been people telling me to fake it until I make it.
I’m glad you mentioned having good diet/exercise and social life. I feel those areas become overlooked when obtaining confidence and just a overall content/happy mood. Also hearing you say to distance yourself from social media reminded me to think that I’m not really missing on anything if i do so. Thanks melon
i love ya bro, probably my fav youtuber as far as someones character goes
Another thing about confidence know your worth and don’t let other people negative opinion affect you it’s just an opinion don’t let them project their fears on you always put yourself on a a mountain top don’t ever let anyone take you down from it
Day 28 of acknowledging that Anthony is a good person
Grognak The Destroyer can you fill me in on how this meme began
We been on day 28 for a month now
Jakearoo27 time travel
Thank you. Not going lie, this video has come at an werdily good time, confidence is something I've been struggling with. I've just turned 20 and I'm feeling like I've already been waisting my life. There's a lot of little things eating away at me, making me unproductive and anxious. I feel like i have an idea of where to start now. Thanks Mellon
Do 'I Hate Mars Bars'.
Nice. Everyone should spam IHE's channel with "REVIEW IGOR" comments
@@HyenaFox No.
Dom J.M. Wow
@@fakerob519 Yes.
Melon builds up my self confidence then completely destroys it when he reviews my favourite albums
Listen to 'Confidence' by Ocean Alley. Australian psychedelic rock band and reggae fusion.
Hey Jedwards, MAJOR thank you for this obscure comment!! I checked these fellas out and I really like them! I'm a fan of all kinds of Aussie psych rock + reggae outfits and I'm shocked these guys flew under my radar, Cheers!
my favorite animal crossing character with the best advice
He wants us to grow confidence so we can be confident enough to not want the IGOR review
“And you will Fuck up ,MASSIVELY “ I love this guy I swear
I don't think buying seventeen more Ridge wallets will improve my self-confidence, Melon
Graduating in the coming month, and the post grad job hunt is brutal. Thanks for this Melon
what an absolutely lovely suprise! i really enjoyed this video, i understand your main focus is music but you should definitely make more of these in the future!
I agree: build self-esteem by self-expansion, grit and practice. Develop skills and good habits, rather than blowing yourself up with hot air, like so many self-help gurus advise. And the mistakes on the journey serve to temper self-confidence with humility, so one doesn't end up being a self-satisfied pain in the arse.
Great advice Anthony. I'll take it to heart and buy myself a Ridge Wallet now. The one true way to always be confident in myself. ☺
I think you have some really good points here, but in general for me at least, i’ve heard a lot of these points a million and one times, so i’m feeling
a light to decent 5
Where IGOR at Melon?
Cofidence is like reviewing IGOR it is a slow process like listening to a song from IGOR and analyzing for 11 hours
damn melon. i am 24 now, and i wish i could send this video back in time to when i was 20 or so. still have no idea what I'm really doing but am feeling much more confident (forever) in taking precautions to ensure it turns out the best way possible. love you
2:31 Melon speaking bout the MBDTF review lol
Fuck the reviews this is a very important video. Thanks Anthony.
Thank you, Melon. You've talked me into talking to my crush.
A music critic & life coach? We love a multi talented king
For a melon, your advice is pretty good..
he does really care about his audience, love u melon.
You’re like a father for me at this point Anthony ❤️
nerd
The part about making small goals that build up is so important
Look, Fantano, I know that Blue is your favourite Weezer album, but you didn't have to upload a video telling me how to be confident just as I was listening to Pinkerton of all albums. I'm watching you, Melon.
Confidence. Faith in yourself. Faith doesn’t necessitate logic and reason, only will. Confidence is nothing more than the will to believe in yourself, regardless. Will can be hard to summon in hard times. Don’t be afraid of that difficulty; embrace it. Because when you summon will at your weakest, you begin the very track record of success that enhances the confidence your will begins.
I neglected my plant and it died Anthony, what do I do now Anthony?!
2:06 love those preaching motions lol
Maybe I’ll feel more confident if you review IGOR.
MORE!
More lol
Thank you for this. I just had my first attempt at teaching (my own rookie class in college, it was a 60min project done with 4 other colleagues from the same class) and I couldn’t speak up loud enough, or make my point across without doubling down on something I just explained, it was very rough because I could see their facial expressions crying for me to speak louder and hear jokes about my first time teaching... I can go to class today feeling a lot better about myself now because of your reminder that failure is a part of the process, thank you
Thank you for these kind of videos bro ❤️❤️
Confidence is a slippery eel to acquire and maintain! Despite appearances, you will find that your heroes, your inspirations, and the people who have changed your life struggle with many of the same problems that you do. Matters tend to look neater and nicer from an outside perspective. Try to understand and be kind :)