Best rule of thumb I've found is to assume that everyone either knows what you're up to or that, given enough time, they will figure it out. This ensures one knows it's a bad idea to lie since it will be found out, no matter how small the lie was. Thus one needs to show ownership of any mistakes to not lose face in the eyes of others. They know if you fucked up and they will judge you according to your actions.
@@alisalehi6991 I'd consider "owning up to ones mistakes" as some mix of: finding out what one has done wrong, how one can fix it, and how one can make sure it won't happen again. I don't know if there's any more specific way of putting it since this is a very abstract answer and question.
Lying about your mistakes or hiding them under the rug will make them come back at you in a more complex form that will ultimately do more damage than you accepting and owning your mistake and then do the adjustments to prevent it or reduce its frequency.
Telling the truth has a compounding effect for trust. If you can step up and admit when you don't know something, people will believe you even more so when you step up and say you DO know something
Really enjoy the mini videos. I try to get my guys to watch your stuff and these bite size pieces make it easy for them to learn something little a few times a week.
When someone in a leadership position has shown their knowledge and ability in their sphere of action and is viewed as competent... the person who is asked is likely to think that they are being tested. Ask that same person the same question 72 hours later and they will typically knock the ball out of the park. Answering it the way they wished they answered it the first time. Questioning builds competence. People who are afraid to be found wanting... are often afraid to be questioned on their qualifications are often very dismissive of others. When you know your business forwards and backwards, inside out, upside down and sideways... you are ready. Questions will get there. Questioning proper orders and authority is something altogether different. Yet when authority can not honestly, accurately answer questions something is wrong. If the task is finding out whats wrong. Quickly making nondangerous errors points out the mistakes and mixing it up gets everything done fast. Errors that can be corrected are your friend. Mistakes that go uncorrected are the enemy. Maintenance of mistakes because no one is allowed to question... endless work and few results. Questions are beautiful.
Jocko this episode hits me on so many levels. I did not have a good last year, I've paid for it am still paying for it. However, I feel like ever since I started listening to others instead of just saying well their being mean or their not understanding me, and actually taking what they say to heart, listening to them helps tenfold. when we do wrong, people will let us know of our fault and most of time it won't be kind of the way we want it to sound, but no matter how bad the rumors, or the advice gets you gotta be able to own it. Its the only way they will be on the path to success. I will never say one will ever get back 100% trust. Some may never get to that level. But if you start hearing them out and treating others better(not just for yourself but for others, gotta be sincere), but not just hearing them out; doing the right thing, and then showing them results (cause you can't just listen you have to act on it as well), it can only work in your favor.
Yo my best friend stole from me and I been cut him off because he’s a snake he still wants to be cool with me but nah you can’t regain trust from stealing from your homies 🤷🏽♂️
Democrats Are bad This is about mistakes, not about someone purposely crossing you. That said, good on you for cutting off the bad fruit, that takes some guts.
@@CaliburovX4 any politician is bad regardless of party affiliation.the comment is the same as saying all. Mexicans are bad or all Arabs are bad in the world we live in today I think throwing someone in a group and degrading them instead of meeting the person and deciding for yourself is wrong.
I said SMILE and you said IAm! And I screamed. And my dad looked at me like I lost my mind. 🇺🇸🇺🇸😂😂❤️❤️💕 Oh I watch your videos because my brother graduates West Point soon. 🥰 and he said he watches your videos.
I make mistakes all the time. And theres a lot of areas id ask for help in. The last 2 lies I told were one to my dad catching me eat one of his yougurt cups. And to my mother about a number of pills I took. I try not to do it very often, learned the concquences of lying pretty young.
I recently did something very bad at work where I tried to sabotage a coworker for my own gain (they didn't know I orchestrated it) and while I'm the type to always own up I had trouble here. I did it today before leaving for the Holidays and while it obviously didn't go well I feel a lot better that I at least learned my lesson, thanks for the help this video gave when facing up!
when it comes to the whole "mutiny" thing, i had a similar situation where a guy got promoted to E6 because an E6 was required to be in charge of a certain object and i dont completely remember what that object was. it was 11 years ago (but thats the only reason he was promoted, not his credibility or his ability to lead troops).. we went as a squad and very similar outcome, our 1SG said "suck it up" but the next week he got moved into the motorpool and we were given better leadership. Top pulled all of us aside again and explained how we frustrated him into taking his new mandatory position in a joking manner but we all got the message.
I feel like this conversation can be said with infidelity. Keep it in your pants, tell her the truth, and admit it was wrong. No blame placing. Then there’s an ACTUAL CHOICE to apply the change to keep doing the bad habit or change the behavior for the better and get a better hold of yourself and realize that mistakes can affect others and yourself. Your actions will speak so much louder than your words. There’s always a choice, so why not CHOOSE better? “The best apology, is changed behavior” and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with showing humility. Be strong, it’s a MOUNTAIN to climb. Don’t fall when you reach the top it’s just as easy
Thankyou Jocko this video is way better than the usual "pick yourself up by the bootstraps " ass shit you usually upload . That is not intended as a trolling comment
I tend to agree with this. But I might add that some kinds of trust are, in my opinion, earned like when you prove you can do a job, such as in the military, then those you serve with trust that you will come through in the moment of necessity that you will have their back.
Too black and white. And the word earn in this case does not mean any particular active action that one does to earn trust, but it's used when someone has proven to be trustworthy time and time again. Yes in the end trust is always given, but that does not mean that is the only factor in decision making and even thought it might be the most important singular link in that chain. You probably do not just hand your trust to anyone especially in important matters so what is the thing that makes you then choose some person over another? Or why not e.g. just pick total stranger and give your trust to them? Would you just give full access to your bank account to any Tom, Dick or Jane or could it be that some people you know have shown time and time they are trustworthy, thus they have earned your trust even if "earning" it might not be the active action from their part? And trust is not exactly like love because love is a feeling that can happen without asking your brain anything, and only after years and years love and trust might start to look a like, but one e.g. does not fall in trust like one can fall in love.
Xavier Soto No. It’s not. No matter how perfect someone performs, ultimately the person has to give the trust being sought. You can’t take the trust. You have to receive it.
Frances Ball And it is still the responsibility of the person to give his/her trust to the other person. Have you ever been in a relationship where no matter what you do the other person never fully trusts you? I have. I’ve learned the issue was hers, not mine.
How does one move on when everyone is constantly looking into their past mistakes, especially when you've owned up to those problems and changed your lifestyle to a better one?
I admitted a mistake but did so and made myself sound like the worst of the worst just to show that I regret doing it but instead got cut off....My mistake for exaggerating regret.
@@thecrow4597 No just lost a friend.After I pushed my brother after he called me a pussy.He fell. Yes I reacted too much,but then again that was 5 months ago. I'm glad I found this channel tho,it really helps even with other topics. Edit:Channel
If someone who looks and sounds like Jocko came up to me and said "Boss, I made a mistake. Here's why." I would immediately trust that he would do better next time. But if someone who talks like Joe Biden worked for me, I would doubt him even if he never did anything wrong. So yeah, appearance matters. And also the WAY you admit your mistake matters.
@@Kyrious im afraid if I read the books the podcasts will lose their magic. and i need the podcasts to not lose their magic. it's complicated, but basically I absorb them better if i don't know what's going to happen next.
@@Kyrious By the way, thank you for saying something positive. Too many ppl are negative of super aggressive online lately, it's nice to see replies like this. I can honestly say I get attacked a lot more everywhere else than on this military blog. Here everyone is so polite it is refreshing ^_^
What about when you make a mistake which you know you’ll make again and again? How do you take ownership of your future failure where you know the reasons but don’t know how to address and solve those reasons without “making excuses”?
It’s simple. Grow up and stop making that mistake. It gets old SUPER QUICK when people make the same mistakes OVER and OVER again and then keep apologizing. ACTIONS speak louder than WORDS my friends. Also that’s an excuse and a sure way to get rid of ALL of your friends. Own up to your sh*t , and hope that the people that you lied to -that SOMEDAY you can regain their trust. But trust takes time. And like a good reputation which takes YEARS to build, one or two (in my case) lies can take- well it destroys a good reputation in a instant. But that’s your own shit. Deal with it, OWN IT. Grow the f*ck up! Don’t make the same mistakes over and over AGAIN! You’re not a child.
Kelly Anne Archer I’m talking about a situation where you have not yet learned to stop making that mistake. Some things take time to learn. Sometimes lots of time.
@Jocko Have you, or any of your 'ex friends', know about this guy and his work? ruclips.net/video/OhjkqLhbgu8/видео.html I'm ex-Navy, MM3, and I think you and your 'friends' might be able to help with this guys missions. Just hoping to connect two youtubers together to help society as a whole. Keep up the great work!
2:30 now imagine having that in a neo-communist or communist regime. The officer would get a promotion and the guys complaining would get a harsh penalty. Your rules apply mostly in the USA or other similar countries, here in Eastern Europe, not so much :)
@@rashergobbler02 I just completed mental health with the forensics unit department.. told him I was completed with my mental health treatment .. he looked at his computer and it went.. Beep boop -beep beep -beep... he looked back at me and said.. HEY CLINT. looks like you are all done with mental health treatment.. one more appointment and you are good to go ! hey great job! alright for Clint ! There is no one worthy to tell that too. so I will lay it all out right here -THANK YOU
Yes but also people in politics are very afraid of liability. Especially in american law, saying sorry is admitting guilt. But he could say: yes this happened under my command, very sorry and we'll be investigating how this happened and how to fix it. Other american presidents were able to do thar too. With trump when something bad happens in the government he still speaks like he's in the opposition, speaking of shame as if this happened under someone elses game.
Admitting mistakes in a high political position can be career suicide though. Sure, he might lose your respect, and I agree with you, but you gotta see the whole, real picture here. A President can't go around talking about all the mistakes he's making left and right, he has to appear in charge - which he does to 80% of the population because they are unaware of the mistake in the first place.
You always seem to post the specific videos that I need, when I need them most!
SCG_Joey he's been slightly off the mark the last couple days I notice but for the most part...yes.
Andrew Graves how he been slightly off the mark?
Andrew Graves so’s your mom. Your mom jokes always win
Yeah that is a trip.. it's always insync with my life too.
Love there's no hesitation on Jocko's answer. Own it, we all make mistakes, it takes great character t accept it and take responsibility
Best rule of thumb I've found is to assume that everyone either knows what you're up to or that, given enough time, they will figure it out. This ensures one knows it's a bad idea to lie since it will be found out, no matter how small the lie was. Thus one needs to show ownership of any mistakes to not lose face in the eyes of others. They know if you fucked up and they will judge you according to your actions.
Good advice
So what kind of action do you have to take then specifically? Sure enough, "own the mistakes*. But what should you exactly say and act as a leader?
@@alisalehi6991 I'd consider "owning up to ones mistakes" as some mix of: finding out what one has done wrong, how one can fix it, and how one can make sure it won't happen again. I don't know if there's any more specific way of putting it since this is a very abstract answer and question.
The truth ALWAYS comes out.
*Some people, once you lose their trust, very very hard to get back*
Lying about your mistakes or hiding them under the rug will make them come back at you in a more complex form that will ultimately do more damage than you accepting and owning your mistake and then do the adjustments to prevent it or reduce its frequency.
Forgiveness is the Key. For Yourself too 😎
Telling the truth has a compounding effect for trust. If you can step up and admit when you don't know something, people will believe you even more so when you step up and say you DO know something
Really enjoy the mini videos. I try to get my guys to watch your stuff and these bite size pieces make it easy for them to learn something little a few times a week.
When someone in a leadership position has shown their knowledge and ability in their sphere of action and is viewed as competent... the person who is asked is likely to think that they are being tested. Ask that same person the same question 72 hours later and they will typically knock the ball out of the park. Answering it the way they wished they answered it the first time. Questioning builds competence. People who are afraid to be found wanting... are often afraid to be questioned on their qualifications are often very dismissive of others. When you know your business forwards and backwards, inside out, upside down and sideways... you are ready. Questions will get there. Questioning proper orders and authority is something altogether different. Yet when authority can not honestly, accurately answer questions something is wrong. If the task is finding out whats wrong. Quickly making nondangerous errors points out the mistakes and mixing it up gets everything done fast. Errors that can be corrected are your friend. Mistakes that go uncorrected are the enemy. Maintenance of mistakes because no one is allowed to question... endless work and few results. Questions are beautiful.
Jocko this episode hits me on so many levels. I did not have a good last year, I've paid for it am still paying for it. However, I feel like ever since I started listening to others instead of just saying well their being mean or their not understanding me, and actually taking what they say to heart, listening to them helps tenfold. when we do wrong, people will let us know of our fault and most of time it won't be kind of the way we want it to sound, but no matter how bad the rumors, or the advice gets you gotta be able to own it. Its the only way they will be on the path to success. I will never say one will ever get back 100% trust. Some may never get to that level. But if you start hearing them out and treating others better(not just for yourself but for others, gotta be sincere), but not just hearing them out; doing the right thing, and then showing them results (cause you can't just listen you have to act on it as well), it can only work in your favor.
This is a solid video. I really like how you illustrated the issue with that personal experience.
I needed to hear this today. Thank you Sirs.
True, we are involuntarily transparent (people can see though most of out BS).
You guys need a Jocko Clips podcast!
Yo my best friend stole from me and I been cut him off because he’s a snake he still wants to be cool with me but nah you can’t regain trust from stealing from your homies 🤷🏽♂️
Democrats Are bad
This is about mistakes, not about someone purposely crossing you.
That said, good on you for cutting off the bad fruit, that takes some guts.
Yes, you gotta draw line in sand, especially if it's your friends.
@@CaliburovX4 any politician is bad regardless of party affiliation.the comment is the same as saying all. Mexicans are bad or all Arabs are bad in the world we live in today I think throwing someone in a group and degrading them instead of meeting the person and deciding for yourself is wrong.
@@user-mb4zi9ux9q The guy he was replying to was named "Democrats are Bad". He didn't just make that statement
I said SMILE and you said IAm! And I screamed. And my dad looked at me like I lost my mind. 🇺🇸🇺🇸😂😂❤️❤️💕
Oh I watch your videos because my brother graduates West Point soon. 🥰 and he said he watches your videos.
Right on time.
I make mistakes all the time. And theres a lot of areas id ask for help in. The last 2 lies I told were one to my dad catching me eat one of his yougurt cups. And to my mother about a number of pills I took. I try not to do it very often, learned the concquences of lying pretty young.
I recently did something very bad at work where I tried to sabotage a coworker for my own gain (they didn't know I orchestrated it) and while I'm the type to always own up I had trouble here. I did it today before leaving for the Holidays and while it obviously didn't go well I feel a lot better that I at least learned my lesson, thanks for the help this video gave when facing up!
Moral of the story: take ownership and stay humble🙌🏼
Jocko I would love to see an interview with someone who is uk SF , Ant or Ollie or Foxy would be so cool
when it comes to the whole "mutiny" thing, i had a similar situation where a guy got promoted to E6 because an E6 was required to be in charge of a certain object and i dont completely remember what that object was. it was 11 years ago (but thats the only reason he was promoted, not his credibility or his ability to lead troops).. we went as a squad and very similar outcome, our 1SG said "suck it up" but the next week he got moved into the motorpool and we were given better leadership. Top pulled all of us aside again and explained how we frustrated him into taking his new mandatory position in a joking manner but we all got the message.
Sleep In a little later is a tip. You’re awesome my man.
Haha I take it you’re MOT a fan of getting up at the a$$ crack of dawn??
Thank you
Ive noticed that if you take the blame, people tend to respect you more. You immediately lose it if you deny you made the mistake.
Solid advice.
#JustWhatINeeded
I make today big mistake at work, take ownership. Waiting for things to develop. But I'm glad that i didn't look for excuses, with whatever result
I feel like this conversation can be said with infidelity. Keep it in your pants, tell her the truth, and admit it was wrong. No blame placing. Then there’s an ACTUAL CHOICE to apply the change to keep doing the bad habit or change the behavior for the better and get a better hold of yourself and realize that mistakes can affect others and yourself. Your actions will speak so much louder than your words. There’s always a choice, so why not CHOOSE better?
“The best apology, is changed behavior” and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with showing humility. Be strong, it’s a MOUNTAIN to climb. Don’t fall when you reach the top it’s just as easy
I'm honest about this, stab me in the back once and it's finito forever, best friend, family, I don't discriminate.
me too. ''pillar of salt'' - that simple
Admitting you don't know and asking is strength.
Pretending is weakness
Thankyou Jocko this video is way better than the usual "pick yourself up by the bootstraps " ass shit you usually upload . That is not intended as a trolling comment
Came across the story in Leadership Strategy and Tactics book
Ha, I name drop Jocko & Echo ALL the time like we're good old pals........... #mycraft #hiyaa
radiomen question: what would cause a workplace/retail radio, to pick up cell phone conversations?
Trust can NEVER be earned. Ultimately, trust MUST be given.
Before you argue, Trust is exactly like Love. They both MUST be given.
Scott Campbell
The fact that you gave trust means that the person receiving it earned it, right?
It’s the same thing.
I tend to agree with this. But I might add that some kinds of trust are, in my opinion, earned like when you prove you can do a job, such as in the military, then those you serve with trust that you will come through in the moment of necessity that you will have their back.
Too black and white. And the word earn in this case does not mean any particular active action that one does to earn trust, but it's used when someone has proven to be trustworthy time and time again.
Yes in the end trust is always given, but that does not mean that is the only factor in decision making and even thought it might be the most important singular link in that chain.
You probably do not just hand your trust to anyone especially in important matters so what is the thing that makes you then choose some person over another? Or why not e.g. just pick total stranger and give your trust to them?
Would you just give full access to your bank account to any Tom, Dick or Jane or could it be that some people you know have shown time and time they are trustworthy, thus they have earned your trust even if "earning" it might not be the active action from their part?
And trust is not exactly like love because love is a feeling that can happen without asking your brain anything, and only after years and years love and trust might start to look a like, but one e.g. does not fall in trust like one can fall in love.
Xavier Soto No. It’s not. No matter how perfect someone performs, ultimately the person has to give the trust being sought. You can’t take the trust. You have to receive it.
Frances Ball And it is still the responsibility of the person to give his/her trust to the other person. Have you ever been in a relationship where no matter what you do the other person never fully trusts you? I have. I’ve learned the issue was hers, not mine.
I don't like being discrimated against for my age.
Dammit Jocko's on swole
THIS CAME IN CLUTCH
I'm on the curve. Did this today.
I fuck up? Good. I learned. I OWN IT. I adjust fire. Re-Execute.
Captain Herbert Sobel comes to mind. 506 PIR.
How does one move on when everyone is constantly looking into their past mistakes, especially when you've owned up to those problems and changed your lifestyle to a better one?
That's the thing stop looking back, you're gonna fall, keep moving forward and remember mistakes and learn
He looks like a PMC from Escape from Tarkov
51-56
I admitted a mistake but did so and made myself sound like the worst of the worst just to show that I regret doing it but instead got cut off....My mistake for exaggerating regret.
Yeah that's a bummer, but I wouldn't say it would be bad to reverse that and use the best of your best to score another job
Was it to someone you were dating or of the other sex? Cause that is totally different.
@@thecrow4597 No just lost a friend.After I pushed my brother after he called me a pussy.He fell.
Yes I reacted too much,but then again that was 5 months ago.
I'm glad I found this channel tho,it really helps even with other topics.
Edit:Channel
Good advice, but then how do you handle the people who jump all over you for admitting you made a mistake?
Is ok not to want somebodys trust right?
Like I say, ( in my kind way), own up butter cups!
Mmm Reese’s pb cups. Haha my fave. That and almond joy. Noice! 😂🤗
💪
Wasn't that a band of brothers?
That's it 🙃
👍👍
a break in trust by cheating can never be forgiven. if you partner cheats thats a death sentence for the relationship.
If someone who looks and sounds like Jocko came up to me and said "Boss, I made a mistake. Here's why." I would immediately trust that he would do better next time. But if someone who talks like Joe Biden worked for me, I would doubt him even if he never did anything wrong. So yeah, appearance matters. And also the WAY you admit your mistake matters.
🤙
I don't wanna break 869 😐
".....and then he fired the guy" -- hahaha, awesome!
I heard this story in his latest book. So I saw it coming, I love Jocko’s way of telling stories though.
@@Kyrious im afraid if I read the books the podcasts will lose their magic. and i need the podcasts to not lose their magic. it's complicated, but basically I absorb them better if i don't know what's going to happen next.
@@Kyrious By the way, thank you for saying something positive. Too many ppl are negative of super aggressive online lately, it's nice to see replies like this. I can honestly say I get attacked a lot more everywhere else than on this military blog. Here everyone is so polite it is refreshing ^_^
My SKINNY KNEES were here
What about when you make a mistake which you know you’ll make again and again?
How do you take ownership of your future failure where you know the reasons but don’t know how to address and solve those reasons without “making excuses”?
It’s simple. Grow up and stop making that mistake. It gets old SUPER QUICK when people make the same mistakes OVER and OVER again and then keep apologizing. ACTIONS speak louder than WORDS my friends. Also that’s an excuse and a sure way to get rid of ALL of your friends. Own up to your sh*t , and hope that the people that you lied to -that SOMEDAY you can regain their trust. But trust takes time. And like a good reputation which takes YEARS to build, one or two (in my case) lies can take- well it destroys a good reputation in a instant. But that’s your own shit. Deal with it, OWN IT. Grow the f*ck up! Don’t make the same mistakes over and over AGAIN! You’re not a child.
I heard it said in a Britney Murphy movie, “ Act like age, not your shoe size” words to LIVE by”.
Be HONEST
Kelly Anne Archer I’m talking about a situation where you have not yet learned to stop making that mistake. Some things take time to learn. Sometimes lots of time.
Kelly Anne Archer > BE HONEST
I agree that honesty is the best policy. The hard part is if someone doesn’t believe your honesty.
My 13 year old daughter thinks jacko is awesome.
@Jocko Have you, or any of your 'ex friends', know about this guy and
his work? ruclips.net/video/OhjkqLhbgu8/видео.html I'm ex-Navy, MM3, and I think
you and your 'friends' might be able to help with this guys missions.
Just hoping to connect two youtubers together to help society as a
whole. Keep up the great work!
I punched a fridge my parents don’t care, they love that fridge like a son which is sad considering I’m their son
Vw
2:30 now imagine having that in a neo-communist or communist regime. The officer would get a promotion and the guys complaining would get a harsh penalty. Your rules apply mostly in the USA or other similar countries, here in Eastern Europe, not so much :)
Owning it and then not blaming others. Saw many that could own it. Not everyone continues to own it.
why am I telling my life story in the comment section of RUclips.. anyone ?
Build TRUST with someone worthy, then talk to them about it
@@rashergobbler02 I just completed mental health with the forensics unit department.. told him I was completed with my mental health treatment .. he looked at his computer and it went.. Beep boop -beep beep -beep... he looked back at me and said.. HEY CLINT. looks like you are all done with mental health treatment.. one more appointment and you are good to go ! hey great job! alright for Clint ! There is no one worthy to tell that too. so I will lay it all out right here
-THANK YOU
Thank you thank you thank you, congratulations ? you got the job? hello
One of the reasons I can’t respect Trump is that he never admits a mistake.
Yes but also people in politics are very afraid of liability. Especially in american law, saying sorry is admitting guilt.
But he could say: yes this happened under my command, very sorry and we'll be investigating how this happened and how to fix it. Other american presidents were able to do thar too. With trump when something bad happens in the government he still speaks like he's in the opposition, speaking of shame as if this happened under someone elses game.
Admitting mistakes in a high political position can be career suicide though. Sure, he might lose your respect, and I agree with you, but you gotta see the whole, real picture here. A President can't go around talking about all the mistakes he's making left and right, he has to appear in charge - which he does to 80% of the population because they are unaware of the mistake in the first place.