YES YES YES!!!! I am sooooo anti-social media - especially with what's going on with Facebook and Google in the media. It's a giant trap of triggers and negative stimulation. If it weren't for this channel or work, there's no way I'd participate. Just wanted to say how much I agree =) =) -Rob
It’s hard to tell someone you love with bipolar that they are being hurtful or mean to you, and they don’t have the clarity or awareness to take the feedback and work on it, and instead act more aggressively and harshly and make you seem like the crazy judgmental person. It’s so contradictory to how they tell us to give them feedback, but in the middle of an episode, you give feedback and it backfires. I’m really struggling right now, with a fiancé who in anger and mania called off our wedding and left me to pick up the pieces, call vendors and make the announcement to family and friends, meanwhile I’m upset and sad and trying to act with forgiveness and empathy. Meanwhile they seem like theyre having the best time of their life with zero accountability or responsibility to others, spending money and acting like they’re single as if they weren’t going to get married in three months, it’s so hard, I hate this disorder, I hate it so much, it has tested my patience, my limits at forgiveness while also balancing my own boundaries, how to be and remain loving towards a partner who is acting against you, how do you even plan a wedding when you don’t know if an episode will occur and will completely destroy all plans? How do you plan for anything two months in advance since they can be so prone to suddenly cancelling or abandoning plans?! 😣😔 I want to help my partner but I feel powerless and helpless when I’m constantly pushed away, so I remain on the side just waiting and hoping.
@@libramagyk”we”? As in folks with bipolar disorder? 😢I don’t want to run, I want to be there for those I love, and if they happen to struggle with an illness, I don’t want that to be a limiting factor for me to love them. I myself have depression and I’ve cut contact with people during my episodes, feeling like a burden to them or feeling like I don’t deserve any love or good in my life, so I do those things like doing them a “favor” and later I realize that’s not fair and it only hurts me more. That’s why I don’t want to run. Everyone deserves to be loved fully. Yes boundaries and limits are important, but so is patience, compassion, and just being there.
@beesonpetals7154, I find myself in a similar situation. It's astonishing how much patience and forgiveness I've discovered within myself, becoming a source for all the anger and frustration.
@beesonpetals7154 are there online communities where people share their experiences and provide support for those dealing with similar challenges? It might be beneficial for us to explore those and find some like-minded individuals who can relate to our situations 😢
My fiance just left me and our boys. He's been in a loop of I love you I don't love you and I just need to move out. It's heartbreaking to have to let go but it's not ok to continue hurting over and over
I have bipolar 2 and I tell my boyfriend that “when I’m depressed, I can’t be as lovey-dovey as when I am in hypomania. But that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. So please know that I love you no differently. I have low self esteem and be skeptical but I love you.”
That is so awesome! It's so crucial for us to communicate to our loved ones, especially when we are in a more state and better able to having those kind of discussions. Awesome! 🤗🙏🌞 - Rob For additional content consider joining us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Seriously, resonates self esteem and skeptical, the wrong people around us tend to take advantage of us. And then emotional reactions I feel are others faults, but maybe I also was cruel with people I care about. I’m not sure.
My partner also has bipolar 2, and during hypomania, which seems to happen every year in the spring, he will suddenly grow cold and distant, irritable, and also suddenly break up with me, but then a week later may say I love you. It’s a lot of back and forth. Does this sound like normal typical hypomanic behavior? Have you done this to your boyfriend? I can’t count how many times I’ve been broken up with within a single month.
It’s all about walking on eggshells for those who love you and it’s something that deserves a lot of respect and praise for those who are always there for you! Make sure you let them know you love them and teach them how they can help! They want to know!
I believe my Mom has had bipolar since I was young but haven’t got a diagnosis… I started showing signs after traumatic events in childhood & teenage years… I have BP 1 & she doesn’t understand it & wounds me with her words & it was awful last Friday… I was crying talking about missing my husband who passed & she didn’t say a word all the way home in the car & I wanted & needed nurturing & told her please say something & she said she was afraid she’d say the wrong thing because of past times how I reacted so I felt unloved & abandoned & rejected. She sent on & on for about 15 minutes & didn’t end well… I want so badly a good relationship with her. I love her! She’s going to be 90 soon & I don’t ever want that to happen again!!! She has a heart condition & I just do not want to upset her ever again!!! This time it was her getting defensive saying she can’t be the Mom I need her to be… & she never knows what to say… all I needed was a hug & an I’m sorry you feel this way… is there anything I can do… that’s not hard! She said she was stupid & didn’t have a Psychiatry degree & didn’t know how to handle me & other stuff like you are probably going to feel this way the rest of your life so you have to deal with it… I think she meant grieving and or the BO depression… she has said also I don’t have it so bad & there’s a lot more people worse off & count your blessings or look at so & so… you don’t see them complaining… pray more, complain less…. SOMEBODY , give me something to help with communication between us or send me a video I can send her… I sent her the 10 thing to say & not to say etc… thank you for listening🙏🏼❤️🩹
The hardest thing living with my bipolar family member, is losing them. They're a different person and it's like a stranger in the house, sometimes for weeks. Almost 23 years living around Bipolar.😮
When someone I love understands bipolar I do so much better! When they don't understand it well, but BELIEVE the diagnosis, I do OK. If they challenge it, mock me, or think I'm just crazy...well that's the biggest trigger of all. I felt defensive of this in my younger years as I wasn't convinced I had bipolar myself, even after being diagnosed and hospitalized. Then I came to realize I did indeed have bipolar, but couldn't find the line between what I could control and what I couldn't. What was I responsible for? What was I not? Here's what I learned: I'm responsible for taking good care of myself best I can. I'm responsible for everything really...except the intense FEELINGS-that's my chemistry's fault. SO I STOPPED ACTING ON THEM!...I SIMPLY STOPPED. I sat quietly in my enormous discomfort. That took practice, practice, practice. I offered an explanation to those close to me and asked for simple support, often just for time alone. If someone didn't believe me or made me feel less-than, I offered no defense. I know it's real and that's all that matters. I learned how to appologize for my mistakes during the toughest of times. Not because I did things on purpose (I'm bipolar) but because I (or my bipolar) hurt someone. But It doesn't matter which. Hurt is hurt...and I am sorry. Then I grew to realize that just getting thru an episode with dignity strengthened me a great deal. Now I cause alot less hurt...alot less.
I really tried to "hang in" with my friend. I knew he was bi polar. I understood his symptoms. But, I could no longer take his abuse. It was emotional and very hurtful. I had to walk, for my sanity. I tried. I really did.
Even tho it wasnt his intention you did the right thing. I think i m like this and i hurt my friend without knowing it. I finally figured it out why they stopped talking to me and it was my fault. Poor girl 😞
2 ppl household plus addiction on that end as well & I'm exactly there. Nope, nope & more nope. I'll still be there (because we became family), but NOT under my roof. I've been done & I need to focus on my own issues. Got tired of exactly what Rob said "I'm sorry, act like nothing happened" after all the damage only to then continue doing it over n over n over n over again. No... just no. I keep expressing it, but can't wait any longer... must make it happen. If he doesn't believe me that's his issue & not my responsibility. I don't want him to be stuck, but he has to make sure he's not. Not me. Anyway, I totally understand you. Again, I'm still there, but not under same roof. The better I am the better n more I can help him, but from afar.
Thank you for these videos. As someone who struggles with Bipolar disorder I find your videos give me a moment of relief, just knowing I'm not alone in this.
YES!!! That's the reason why I'm so motivated to do this... I remember how much I appreciated those who were there for me, so I can return some of the favor ;) This channel has been a dream for a long time =)
I agree with you 100% I live with type 1 bi polar and I am dying to have a community of other bi polar cases. I cannot keep hearing the garbage modern medicine keeps trying to spoon feed us. First person experience is the only way to learn this beast, so I am building a community of bi polar people to grow together. Feel free to stop in and chat, man. The more the word gets out the more people can get connected. Blessings!
How did you manage to get the courage to come out in the open? There is so much stigma and taboo about this condition. That makes it so sad. How does one work on that aspect - I mean when someone close such as a narcissistic spouse who ridicules you, does gas lighting and reminds you over and over again that there is a condition.
All my life I've been wondering why people hate me and why I hate people. Then when I was told by the doctor that I have bipolar, I just isolated myself it truly affected everything. I felt like I am a bomb to any place I go to and I might explode anytime. Thank you very much for creating this video. I'll do all your tips and we'll see how it'll change my life. I'm hoping for a positive outcome.
My daughter is battling this. I am trying to get her to be the Observer and to recognize when these feelings arise. Step back and try to be the Observer of what is happening and to adjust accordingly. Good luck. God Bless
Seems to run in the family Of course with my children I got to I get the blame She was no walk in the park Heard of overeaters anonymous meetings Manic Fools Rush in
Bipolar has nothing to do with being misanthropic. Many people with bipolar are VERY loving and love others. The problem is that the anger and depression can lead to harming loved ones.
Straight up admitting that you are not in a good mental place to talk is so helpful. If I can avoid a triggering conversation because I know it will put me in a bad place it’s like a lifesaver.
Great tips, thank you Rob. I also really like reading through the comments where sometimes people share their coping strategies... real life examples help! My heart goes out to all who live with bipolar - those actively working on managing it, those in denial, and those who are simply unaware of what's wrong. The Polar Warriors channel can be a game changer.
I wish my ex-husband of 12 years would have found your videos before he killed all we had. All I can do now is try to pick up all the broken pieces and I don't really know how.
Hi.. I have been watching your videos for 2 days.. I’m so glad I found you.. I was diagnosed with clinical depression a long time ago.. I will be 50 on the 13th, because of the depression I started self medicating for the past 3 years on and off.. in the process I have lost my job and car in 2016... my children are grown now and it’s just me and my Yorkie Poodle.. but after watching your videos.. I finally got the courage to call and make an appointment to see a therapist on the 9th.. thank you so much for sharing.. and It’s good to know that I’m not alone.. so please keep sharing!!
I lost costody of my two boy 6 years ago and I started a treatment medication and now evrithing is better but is a battle be positive and for ale ur madicacion
I think you’re great. My family has never taken the time to educate them self on bipolar one. Today, Mother’s Day, I sent my daughter 2of your videos and I sent my partner three or four. My partner was immediately responsive. He came to me and hugged me and cried. Let me tell you he’s never liked it when I cry. I’m crying now. I’ve been checking out videos because I have a lot to offer. I can certainly say I’m text book. I say that because in my abnormal psychology class my instructor told all about me then and today. I’ve moved out of state twice now to get away from my family. And x laws. I’m 57 and waiting to see if my son and new daughter in law text me...god forbid a call to say happy Mother’s Day. I’m preparing myself. Last year he waited until almost midnight. So today is a huge trigger day. Thanks for your help.
I am bipolar I with rapidcycling. My poor boyfriend is rightly fed up with my crashes. He is my calm, but when I don't get to talk to him, I crash harder. I don't know how to explain to him that sometimes all I need to know is that he is there. My own mind produces assumptions that he doesn't want to be with me when he is just busy. I know I can't be with him 24/7, but I make it such a big deal when it really isn't. I am scared to lose him because of my cycles. I have identified most of my triggers and even larger master triggers but could you make a video for loved ones on how to deal with us when we are cycling or in one state or the other. Especially for those of us that shouldn't be left alone to our own vices and minds.
AJ Deveraux that is a wonderful comment. I’m so glad that you shared all of that and what you described is very common for both us and our partners. It really takes both people to make a relationship successful with someone who has bipolar disorder... we have to become really aware of how our symptoms affect our partner and make sure we do everything to prevent symptoms... our partners have to become educated about bipolar disorder so they know the difference between symptoms of an illness, compared to just taking everything personally. There is so much I can say about this and I will do my best to make a video like you recommended. For now, here are a couple of videos I made that might help: ruclips.net/video/14b-xeAzwB0/видео.html ruclips.net/video/JPXq2g05JhM/видео.html There is also a book I would like to recommend to you that has really changed my life and especially relationships. It’s called “loving someone with bipolar disorder” by Julie Fast. You can grab a cheap used copy on eBay if you’d like. It’s an amazing book for us and our partners. I couldn’t recommend it enough. I hope that helps a little bit and stop back by my channel again.
You are so spot on..it is something l learnt to do early on..to remove myself from a bad situation when l might lose the plot. It is so easy to react in anger rather than try to control ourselves..one thing that my family and friends agree with about me is that my ' yes' means 'YES' and my ' no' means 'NO'!..lf l say l will do something l carry it through..my word is my bond. Mind you it is very difficult at first, with our impulsive ways and racing thoughts..takes a while to do. One thing though, always keep a sense of humour, and keep trying. If you're running a race and trip over, you don't lie there forever..you get back up and keep going x
Krazy Kris Fantastic comment! Thank you so much for the kind words and for taking the time to watch my video. It has been so awesome connecting with other people who share the same struggles and just being able to help others. I hope you are having a peaceful week and feeling well my friend :-) -Robert
I have a suggestion that I discovered by accident. I often shop on the Home Shopping Networks on T.V. & often talk on the air. Well one time while they had me on hold to give a testimonial, I thought it would be fun to record it. (& they often will say," remember to keep it short, 1 or 2 minutes." & I really thought I did. WELL, when I heard myself on the air, I could not believe my ears. The poor host could not get one word in. She was very calm, & said thank U so much 4 your call, more than once . She thanked me & said goodbye, I was talking so much & so fast I continued to talk about another 10, or 15 min longer not knowing she said goodbye UNTIL I watched the recording.!st of all it took her a good 5 min to hang up without it looking like they had to cute me off, then I continued. I'm not suggesting U record yourself on the air, BUT do have a loved one record U when U R manic. We know we R bad, but not this bad. At least I didn't. I have bipolar 1 by the way :(
I just found your channel and wish my partner and I had your videos as a resource long ago. They are so on point. I left him a few weeks ago after 8 years and it sucks, I really didn't want to have to go. But admitting you have a condition and then taking responsibility for yourself is so key. Otherwise you just keep fighting over the same old things, which really aren't real anyway since its stuff fabricated from a mental condition. Its not solvable you have to get to the core which is management and treatment, then handling the bad days best you can. Apologizing with grace and not taking your loved ones for granted. Maybe that is what makes the difference between a toxic relationship and not toxic, toxic you dont take responsibility for yourself and not toxic the bad shit still happens sometimes but you do take responsibility for yourself. I dont know, it really pains me to be a mental health advocate but have to leave my parter becuase of his condition, which was making me literally sick with stress. I had to go to save myself and be safe. I wish eveyone the best in their relationships, even in therapy I felt we needed so much more help. 1 hour therapy every couple weeks is like swimming in quicksand.
Thank you so much for your kind comment Allen! :) We appreciate it. If you haven't yet, I'd encourage you to check out Rob's private community on Patreon. He posts exclusive content there of a more personal nature and members can contact him directly through that platform. I'll include the link so you can check it out! I hope your week is off to a good start :) Take care. -Rachel (Polar Warriors team member) www.Patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Dealing with adult child with bipolar can be very very stressful and sometimes extremely painful experiences, when he or she is having his manic depression episode, they use parents as easy target, making up stories, launching personal attacks, blaming parents for their miseries, to me, enough is enough, it has been affecting me tremendously, I finally decided to set up boundaries and keep distance from my abusive adult child, because I need to think about my own well being also. Sure we parents should have compassion for our mentally ill adult children, but it is just not fair to put us through such endless abuses that is literally destroying our life, I feel such emotional pain she put on me is beyond any language descriptions.
Hi I am very sorry that you have been going through this. I have two siblings with severe conditions of BPD one of which is in her 50s and it’s just now being diagnosed. I’ve been subject to abuse by one of my siblings, and it just seems like there are patterns in a BPD patients that they exhibit even on medication and I feel like that’s why therapy is very important. I’m trying to learn how to hold my BPD family members accountable. I noticed patterns in their behavior that are similar. It’s very tough to maintain close relationships with them because they’re unhealthy and on and off medication. It is sad and I pray for us all.
It’s so overwhelming to even know that you are hurting your love one. And at least is doble the work for me mentally because I don’t want to hurt but in the other hand I have this anger and sadness mix with a little bit of everything in btw that it makes me go even crazier. To you all bipolar warrior, thank you for your stories. I was diagnosed with bipolar just 3weeks ago.
Thank you so much for this video, I had difficultly understanding why I kept pushing away those so close to me constantly, over and over again. It kills me that I keep hurting those so close to me after I do the damage. This genuinely gives me a sigh of relief that something can be done to amend this issue I have, hopefully it's not too late.
My son is 20 and has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder for several years. When I speak to him in a kind way about issues with not helping with chores and I feel continuously overwhelmed, he gets argumentative and very mean. He does work and helps with bills, which I have always told him I appreciate it. I'm unable to work because my daughter is disabled and I'm her caregiver. He and I had a bad morning today because I expressed to him that I'm feeling overwhelmed and unappreciated. He told me he hasn't been pulling his weight because he hates living and is depressed. He has a therapy appointment this week and I pray that it helps. I really thought he was doing better but now, I'm unsure. It really is heartbreaking 💔
I am so sorry you're having this trouble at home. Please know you are not alone! There may be a local support group for family and friends that can help which are always free. Or consider seeing a therapist yourself. I believe everyone can benefit from it. It helps you set boundaries and how to enforce them, work on goals and of course a safe space to just talk. Everyone needs that kind of support system. If you are interested Rob offers one on one support on Patreon and we have a support group for patrons only on discord. Take gentle care! Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I just wanted to say that I’m sorry that you were going through this too. One of the things I noticed about my family member with severe BPD is that they struggle to stay on their medication. This makes me watch carefully to learn their baseline behaviors, and it helps me to detect when they’re off meds.
You have the knack of articulating the life of being bipolar. Not easy to do. I have been living with this type of Mental Illness for 47 years and it's such a hard illness to describe to family and loved ones.
My now 42 y.o. daughter has been Bipolar for more years than I realized. I thought she was a free spirit. I’m more educated now. Thank you for your videos 😍😍😍
this explains a lot thanks for this i hurt and said things to friends and loved ones that i never ment in blind rage then said sorry after when i came to my senses and people say you just need to have control except they dont understand its not that easy in the moment for us.
I keep a rant journal and a gratitude journal in notes app. in my phone. So when I get super upset I can yell at my phone and keep those notes about why I was upset and not yell at somebody else and not send a bad text to someone. I try to put things that I feel happy and joyful about in my gratitude journal and I can go over them both later on when I feel better to see how irrational I’ve been being or if I am actually feeling well because all I put in was gratitude. I also keep notes about what I want to talk to people about when they’re not around where I can’t talk right away.I do this so I won’t forget what issues I’m upset about or things that I want to praise or compliment a family member on. I seem to forget constantly.
After 18 years shrink talk lots of fifferent medication .i found your channel. 14 3 2018.at this moment i am manic and listen video after video and you are telling me more than the shrinks tried for 18 yeasrs.thank you so much to educate people with BP or people who wanna know more about it.very usefull.
bianca dongen i’m so glad that you found my channel! I have gone through the same thing… Trying to find a really good doctor shouldn’t be as hard as it is. One of the reasons why I started this channel was to fill a very obvious a gap in information. I will have lots more videos to come, so stop back by anytime. You are very welcome here :-)
Edit: I did it you guys. I took my first step and went to see the drs to get myself help. I'm glad I found your channel tonight. I'm undiagnosed. I been treating her like crap.. say mean things to her just for no reason. I was stuck in the I'm cycle. She told me one night that I might be bi polar and to get an evolution. I never did I said I'll go multiple times but never gone thru with it. She wanted to get help. I self medicated myself with alcohol/drugs. For years. But it has climaxed this past Saturday. I ended up doing something bad when I was in angry mood. She has since pushed me out of her life and doesn't want me around. The sorry cycle got old and I'm not seeking help. Today I'm calling my local clinic to make an appt. I'm hoping the can squeeze me in today. I want to get better and learn how to have healthy balanced lifestyle. She means everything to me. It sucks I had fuck up.. after fuck up till I majorly fucked up to decide enough is enough.
I just want to say thank you 💕 for so long my husband and I have struggled but I know he loves me very much. Long story story (very long made very short lol) we now understand better why we struggle. Your videos are truly helping me understand him so much better and how I can support him and our family 💓
I’ve hurt so many I love. Especially my husband of 9 years. I’m a rageaholic. I’m crashing hard right now. I so want to do better!I’m realizing my medication isn’t working and I need to get it fixed. I need to talk to my therapist soon. I think my mom is bipolar but undiagnosed. She goes into these mean moods much like me or she gets into these crazy shopping moods. It’s like watching myself watching my mom with these moods. Thank you so much!
Very helpful valuable advice. My daughter has managed in highly responsible way her bipolar disorder for 20 years.. she was diagnosed at 16. Life has often been hard for her. I have not always been helpful.. taking very personally things she has said and done when on the emotional rollercoaster. Best advice.. just take a break … no interaction at those times seems to do any good.. wait for the anger to pass. You are doing such important work , Rob. Thank you
Hi, Rob offers one on one support on Patreon if you are interested. He also posts more personal information about his day to day struggles like his recent hospital stay. For the month of July he is offering free phone calls to patrons. Another Patreon exclusive is Rob hosting and moderating weekly support groups on discord! Take gentle care! 🙏 Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I'm trying to educate myself to understand what a Bipolar Person is going through. I really care for someone that is Bipolar... But he isn't open to talk to me about it. Keeps pushing me away. Takes one step forward to me and the next day 10 steps back. Your videos gave me a chance to look inside of his mind. Thank you so much
Hi Rob your videos are helping me when my bipolar husband is being nasty and aggitated, when I start to feel angry with him I play your videos and they make me calm down and remember this is not my loving husband at the moment but I know he will be back! I've sent some of your videos to our family and friends so they can understand why he gets angry with them. You're an inspiration and thank you! thank you! for your time to do this it's helped me so much. Lots of Love to you Sharon ♥️♥️
Thank you so much for this video this is literally what I’ve been doing lately. My boyfriend treats me so well and does so much for me everyday. He cleans up my messes when I’ve been depressive, he listens to my manic rants and wild ideas. But he also tries to show me the logic past my emotions. Which of course triggers me and makes me feel like he doesn’t care about my feelings. He is also bipolar but he has been on medication for 3 years and uses daily exercise as his main outlet. He has created a daily routine he must stick to or else he pays for it later by drawing his bad feelings in alcohol or just being irritable with everyone. I have recently been diagnosed and he is watching me struggle through all that he went through. I take out all my bad moods on him… my mind takes me into a dark paranoid place where everyone is out to get me.. it’s starting to take a huge toll on our relationship and I really don’t want to lose him. I’m going to try the things you said here in this video. Please make more you’re so helpful I appreciate you!
I just found this channel and I've watched several videos already and I absolutely love it. It's so so helpful. I've struggled with bipolar disorder 2 for about 4 years now (it got bad about 4 years ago anyways) and these videos help me with so many aspects of it not to mention how they explain so many things that I never understood before. Like the emotional drive by. I lost so many people from that and at the time I never realized what I was doing or how often. I almost lost my best friend. We're still close but our relationship will never be the same. When that was happening I didn't even know I had bipolar disorder. I was going through so much and I only felt comfortable sharing it with her but when I was so low in my depressive state I couldn't seem to consider what she was going through. I'm subscribing right now. Great job and keep it up!
Thanx man for doing these videos!! You have no idea how much I like them and get alot out of them. With this video you mentioned family? What if you don’t have a nurturing loving family that treats you with respect and cares what your going through. If you don’t like I do, just remember your not a punching bag and if their hurting you, you have to do something about it. In my family (mom and dad are gone now) it’s just my brother and two sisters. THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT BIPOLAR IS. To them I am a screw up and I need to be treated like a child. I realized they will not change and I got them out of my life. My life got better when I did that. You have to surround yourself with positive loving people. Get the dirt out of your life!!! Move on!!! Get a good therapist, read positive books, find loving friends, eat healthy and spend time in nature where you can find yourself but you don’t have to be a punching bag!!!!
Unfortunately I always fall back to the same pattern. I treat the people I love the most like shit, I am taking my medications regularly but it doesn't always help. When anger gets the best of me I lose control of myself, it is like having a big monster inside yourself that can suddenly ruin years of efforts.
Hi I hope you are doing better. I’m not sure if this is a part of my family members BPD, but she has expressed pleasure in hurting other people in the family. I’m trying to figure out ways to hold her accountable for her behavior, especially the hurtful stuff and I’m also trying to understand why . When I’m learning, it’s that you can have BPD and other types of disorders at the same time. But I’m praying for her and I’m praying for you too.
Thank you for making thesd, ive been in a relationship now for 2 years with someone who is bipolar and just recently figured out and learned that they have this condition and these videos are teaching me a lot and help me know that I can keep the relationship going and she also will learning a lot and hopefully we can make things work out
@@bodavis87 that's great to hear. I had a similar story to yours but mine denied getting treatment. She sabatoged our relationship 2 years in. But your story gave me hope for her in the future.
My first reaction is to say “I love you, but I think you are having an episode today and I don’t want it to damage our relationship by what you might say or how you might treat me” and to leave for the day. Is that okay? I don’t want to “abandon” him but I feel like it’s the only thing to keep us out of that “I hate you, now I’m sorry” cycle. I try to be supportive some days but others I feel like it’s smart to remove myself until he comes out of it.
It always depends on the person. If your significant other can trust you, yes I think it's a good option. I had this cycle in my last relationship, but in the end we broke up. She couldn't take me any longer but also didn't said what she thought. I think being open and honest is a important factor in a healthy relationship.
I honestly am so tired of trying to manage this emotional rollercoaster especially being an empath, I am just numb and living this way is nonsense. There doesnt really seem to be a way to find balance and even more frustrating a purpose to not only put myself through constant misery but my family and friends as well. Why does it have tp be this way!😔
I am living through the same thing. I have struggled my whole life with this condition. I cant seem to find a way out of it. Everything I try to do seems to fail and it feels like there is no end. I've been to soooo many doctors and none of the meds help me. they tend to make it worse. I have trouble finding anyone to talk to because I just cant explain myself to anyone properly and I just end up hurting their feelings. School and the pursuit of education has been nearly impossible for me and I'm struggling to find my place in this world. Its just hard when you feel like you don't belong anywhere. I had an alcohol problem for years and I managed to get sober and I have been able to stay sober for 7 years now. But I lost all my friends and social circle due to that. currently it has gotten so bad that I am unemployed and I'm trying to make a living doing other things. I feel for anyone who has to endure this condition. If you are suffering the same way I am, I am really sorry. This channel is really helping me understand myself and these videos are helping my family better understand me. Honestly, I really look up to channels like this. It makes it seem like its possible to get out of this and live a normal life. As impossible as it may seem I will keep fighting and I wont give up or give in to these feelings. I hope each and everyone going through this makes it through.
I relate to this so much. The same has been happening to me. It feels like there is no hope. I have thoughts of killing myself so I can no longer hurt anyone else ever again. It’s dreadful. I’m only 21, and I know that I will have many more episodes and hurt more people. Because of this, I have made it my life’s mission to serve humanity in any way I can. I’ll use my highs to be creative and make people smile. In my lows, I will withdraw myself and deal with the pain alone. I’m ready to accept the suffering and do my best. I will fight for my people, the people who struggle everyday with Bipolar. Until the day I die, I won’t stop looking for a solution. I love you all and take care of yourselves.
Your videos and my diagnosis is lots of years to late. But, keep up the great video's, I feel there is alot of us out there but we just dont realise it yet. Depression is such a cruel disease. Good luck to ALL who suffer.
If I make a mistake in the house, I apologize. If not accepted- I go off the rails and then he tries to be nice, I then cannot stand to talk to him. This never ends. He says he understands and I believe him but then.... if he doesn't understand 100% I'm furious!! How CAN HE understand how my head and thoughts are feeling?? He needs to be more gentle, and I have to remind him of that. I'm very fragile, really. He's the most patient person I've ever met. I'm so sorry I'm me. I don't want to hurt him anymore!!! I always tell him later that it was a bp outburst, if it was. Thank you for all of your life saving vids. xx
Rob is always recommending Julie Fast's book, How to love someone with Bipolar. He is also offering one on one coaching on Patreon and our new polar warriors website. Dianna polar warriors team member Rob, I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Thankyou for the video ,I'm the spouse to a bi polar sufferer.I feel like a punching bag. And I think understanding is taking its toll. Loving a person with BiPolar ,has a huge impact on my life .The relationship itself has much love ,but you have be very strong to deal with the symptoms.I feel incredible pain ,confusion, frustration ,and sometimes betrayal.Often when the negativity hits in and its like this horrible person replaces my spouse, its like being in a hell pit without escape. Thankyou for sharing your input ,because I struggle to sometimes understand where the explosion comes from or to understand his struggle. I hope one day there is a cure ,where people can live in less confusion
Im so sorry. I drove my husband away 20 years ago with uncontrollable verbal assaults. At the time even though I felt terrible about the things I screamed at him was too ashamed to say Im sorry. Did not know bipolar was attached to me at the time. I feel guilty often about the pain I caused him when he once loved me so much. I honestly loved him with all my heart but demonstrated the opposite for many years. He was safe and got comfortable letting it all out with him thinking hes my person forever. I had no control over my outbursts and he set no boundaries. Set boundaries for him. God bless
So far, I can so relate to you, and the states you describe regarding bipolar and what it does to you. You seem to be hitting all of the familiar nuances of this miserable illness all too well. Please keep it up. You GET it. Doctors do not. MY psych doc told me that happiness was a "choice". I told him he didn't understand what bipolar really felt like. Stalemate.
There are so many horrible doctors out there. They are often put on pedestals and so many people trust their word like it's the final answer... Very scary. I've experienced the same frustration with doctors who read just a page about Bipolar Disorder in medical school. I'm so sorry you had to hear those words from a "medical professional." I'd recommend finding a doctor that has extensive experience with Bipolar Disorder. They would never say something like happiness being a choice. I'm glad you found my channel =) =) -Rob
My Fiance and I parted ways because of this problem. I went to school and majored in Psychology! After being together for years I couldn't take it anymore!! The same Repetitive Behavior as a Man It's hard to put pride to the side but I did.... Their's 2 places where you will have peace the (Grave) And (Home)... Your videos are definitely helping others... Thanks
I think what your doing is amazing ive been seeing a girl for 3 months who has bipolar and its difficult to say the least where no longer together i said I would be there for her but she didn't want to continue this gives me a lot of clarity from her point of view so thank you
Polar Warrior your videos are amazing. So grounded and clear, 1st hand advice that is very insightful. I was in a 12 year relationship with a man who was talented, gentle and then cruel and I suspect bipolar. He would not get help despite the obvious pattern his moods would take. He choose to mask with alcohol and other painful behavior. He ended his life 4 years after I left and that is still devastating. I've wondered what I could have done differently. Your insights are so helpful.
Gosh, I am so sorry Leslie! So many of us Bipolar folk are gone too soon. Thank you for sharing. Take gentle care🙏🏻 Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community. www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I've hurt so many that I love and tbh you've helped me a lot by watching this video and listening to this advice but like seriously you've helped me like a lot
You’re videos have helped me so much. Thank you and please keep up the great work. My father sat down with me and I’m almost 30 years old and watched your videos with me. It helped him to better understand me and that means SO much for someone who constantly suffers day to day with Bipolar 1 with rapid cycling and Borderline personality disorder.
You put my entire brain into words. It’s hard coming to terms with knowing your toxic tendencies and not always being able to control them. I take responsibility for my disorder and try to do well...but sometimes I slip through those cracks, it’s a horrible illness. I have hurt so many and been hurt.
Thank you I’ve recently had a falling out with someone who struggles with bpd and watching these videos had give me a better understanding on what’s been going on and also how i can improve my responses i appreciate that you take your time to make these
Thank you for caring and your response. I think what you are doing is so amazing. I recommended your channel to my Dr. Told her to check it out and maybe it can help someone else too. Very grateful, thank you
Thank you for your absolutely incredibly, informative videos. You really are an amazing human being for sharing everything about this subject. You really have helped me to understand and love someone unconditionally, with a bipolar disorder.
I watch your videos. I believe this one was the most helpful, thus fur. You are awesome. Please continue . You have no idea how much you are helping me. God bless
thanks Robert for your great videos on manic depression.They have a lot of information about our disorder and solutions to apply during different different situations during the life long times of our disease. You are clear and calm in your understanding of it. you say what I cannot verbalize at times. You are a real joy to see and listen to, Frank O,Donohue'
Frank O'Donohue Thank you so much for the wonderful comment Frank and for supporting my channel. It feels really good to help other people not suffer quite as much as I have. We all breathe the same air! Stop back by anytime my friend :-)
Thank you for all of these amazing videos, so helpful as someone who's trying to support a friend who believes he may have BPD. He can be really abrasive for no apparent reason. And he tends to shut down/withdraw. He's told me more than once not to take his behavior personally. I'm conflict-avoidant by nature, but don't want to have resentment build up because I'm afraid to tell him how hurtful his behavior can be. I've told him I'd appreciate him saying he's really struggling & needs space vs. just disappearing for days or weeks.
Every day I watch a video or 2 and take notes, or I will watch them at night and sleep on the thought then get back to them in the morning and watch them again and take notes. Your channel has helped me to get to know what Bipolar is. You are so helpful and you have a coming presents. I have been struggling with this for my hole life and have been miss diagnosed many times. When I came across your channel and I watched the first 3 episodes. You described me and I was in awe. Because finally there was some one out there that was like me. So thank you again Rob.
Paul John Auditor you are so very welcome and I’m glad you found my channel! I’m so glad it’s helping your relationship and stop by anytime :-) Starting this channel has been hugely helpful for my own relationship too. My partner has been amazingly supportive :-)
My goodness. You are outstanding at explaining the inner workings of illness and effects on relationship. And your recommendations are so helpful. I am watching in hopes too learn how to better work with my grandchildren mother. Who has been is currently in denial of her extreme bipolar illness. If only she could see your videos. I think you give much hope and clarity too all people involved in the emotional Rollercoaster of being bipolar or loving someone who does. GOD Bless You Sir!
I just get so f***ing angry when they don't understand what I'm going through or it's too much for them or they're scared about it. Part of me knows it's not right but I just don't want to be the one comforting them when I am the one going through the pain.
I think that my bipolar brother feels that I deserve to be treated badly because according to him, he is the one who has the right to hurt me He is always right and of course what i feel or think or do doesn't really matter. He has never apologized to me for being a jerk. I know he is sick, but my heart doesn't recognize that when he uses me as his punching bag.
I rant away 3000 miles and 4 years live totally alone,to not hurt anyone,it's my disorder,no one else should suffer,I downgraded my jobs,now working as delivery man ( art director in past),only after 3,5 years start to understand that they miss me and that hurts,they don't know anything ,but to me it's safer like this,then live in that surreal blaming game,I miss them sooo much,and they think I'm bad person.So miserable.
Your loved ones are human beings too, of course they are scared and stressed by your episodes and verbal abuses against them whenever you are feeling down, it is not fair for you to use your mental illness as excuses to hurt your loved ones, it won't resolve anything for your suffering.
Thank you. We just had a daughter together. But i know we both need time to get the negative vibes under control. Everything changes. Hopefully she and i will come back around
Thank you so much dude, this really is helpful, can’t believe some of the solution can be so simple. I got to the point where I knew I would have bad days, and was able to control myself to some degree, but it was really painful because I was still keeping it all to myself. But now I imagine that having people around who know what you are going through would alleviate a lot of that pain because you aren’t walking on eggshells so much but are instead in a supportive social environment.
Samantha Vega I will definitely make a video talking about that because I struggle with that myself. When I experience a mixed state or dysphoric mania, I get paranoid about all sorts of things… Specifically the government, disease, my fears coming true, what people think about me, and so much more. What has helped me a lot is just recognizing the patterns of what I always focus on when I feel like this. Usually it’s the same few things. I get so obsessed that it’s hard to break away and just stop feeding into it (like turning off the news or not reading about negative things). That’s something I’m still working on. I will do my best to make a video talking about this soon. I have a few videos recorded that will be posted soon and a couple more to work on but I will definitely get to this topic so keep stopping by my channel :-)
Polar Warriors hey man..don't let THEIR diagnosis keep you uninformed. The government isn't our friends. This has nothing to do with paranoia, but facts that the gov is not acting in our best interest. This also seems intentionally put into these disorders because they do NOT want people questioning the government. You are not paranoid when it comes to them!
I just found your channel today and have to say it is like you are describing myself and my husband. I am actually thrilled to find this channel. It has been very enlightening and is helping me understand what is going on and how we interact with each other. And it all makes complete sense. Thank you for sharing!
I don't know if I'm bipolar, but this definitely speaks to me. My relationship just ended because I took out my frustrations on them. I always feel horrible after it, but I just don't notice myself in the moment.
I don’t know your name or I would address your personally. You are a blessing and a gift. Few people know the hell like we do. Few understand how horrible it is to be ghosted over and over and over again. The pain is extreme in proportion to our highs and lows. I finally have a friend who wanted to tell me to back off but couldn’t. Having been down that road before, I knew where this was headed and I told her that I hear her, I see her and I honor her. I told her I would and could back off. That was Friday night 8/14. I have been down since, but I am staying true to my word and waiting for her to contact me. I did get some awesome shots of today’s sunrise and sent them on a group thread of which she is a part. But I am giving her space. Ironically, she sent an informational text yesterday to which I didn’t feel the need to respond and when she called me later on, she said she missed me. Someone once said to me, “How can I miss you if you don’t go away?” These are mixed messages, to be sure, but at 52 I have come to realize how baffling and scary this disorder is to the people who love us. She was overwhelmed by me and she remains confused. I thanked her for setting a boundary with me. She told me that together we will find balance. She is a gift that I treasure and I have learned to listen and look for the signs. Blessings in you and all who suffer beside us.
I really appreciate this video. It really help me open up my eyes and help me see my wrongs and realizing I have bipolar everything he said i feel I’m sorry for the people hurt😢 I need to stop my habits
Thank you very much, it's mean a lot for me and my husband.......yes I am not alone with this problems.God bless You from Europe (Hungary)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
U are the best. Thank you for your great support for all of us who r battling good and evil,I've learned a lot about myself,treatment is expensive,so I suffer a lot ,I feel suicidal all the time but I'm a coward,n I don't want to die,just wanna b normal,I don't take meds for it.i just isolate myself n sleep all the time,ur the only one I find help from. Bless
Man I have repeatedly over 21 years done the text thing and even worse it's got to a point were I have alienated everyone. I feel inside that all I have done is unforgivable I've been given chance after chance yet I still cock it all up I won't go out for weeks because I can't face anyone. I wish everyone that I have offended knew about you sir because you explain it all so well
Alan Harrison I fully understand you, I alienated family members many years ago by my actions & phone calls. Even certain friends that knew me from school age. I did try to explain & say how very sorry I was. I moved house to a different area to make a fresh start yet fall outs with toxic neighbours would start. Things are better now for me & I avoid toxic people & especially people I can't trust. The one thing amongst many that I did that helped me was to get rid & distroy my mobile phone in 2017. I have managed so well without one as I have a house phone to make & receive calls. Honestly for me it was the best thing I ever did. I'm no longer tempted to send texts in a negative way. I come from a disfunctional family & i'm the youngest of seven siblings aged 58yrs. I have had no contact with them for several years since my parents death, my life has proved much better for this as they all tried to control me & put me down because of my bipolar disorder. I've tried to tell my partners parents to watch these Polar Warriors video's yet as I was saying it to them they showed no interest & it did fall on deaf ears. Don't continue to punish yourself Alan about everyone that you have offended over time. If they really understood you they would make an effort to perhaps listen to you & your apologies. People with mental health problems are misunderstood yet many people who claim to be "Normal" have many more issues. No feelings, no empathy, selfish, hurtful, rude etc, etc, etc... Trust is the main thing in a relationship & friends etc... Be very careful who you confide in, as I did once for it to backfire on me in a bad way. It's not easy I know but maybe making new friends if you can may help you. Remember when you isolate yourself for weeks on end because you say you can't face anyone for things you've said or done. Those people won't be hiding away indoors or even giving you a second thought, only voicing their opions & gossip with others. Are these people really worth upsetting your life & sleep over? I think not..... Your comment registered with me & how I used to be & feel til I made changes in my life. Life's too short to worry about how others feel about you & more to the point stop causing yourself such unnecessary stress. Hope my comment is of some help to you, take care & be safe 🍪pocket England.
@@biscuitpocket7283 that has really hit me deeply you seem to totally understand thank you so much for them comments I I identify with everything that you say it's like exactly the same as the things I have done and you know how it is I felt like no one could understand it I'm 49 but you know I'm going to take onboard your comments thank you my friend
deleting social media helps immensely. your true friends have your phone number and understand you. which is probably like 1-3 people
YES YES YES!!!! I am sooooo anti-social media - especially with what's going on with Facebook and Google in the media. It's a giant trap of triggers and negative stimulation. If it weren't for this channel or work, there's no way I'd participate. Just wanted to say how much I agree =) =)
-Rob
I have been social media free for two years.
M too olmost a year Facebook free I feal I better
Amen
I did that too
My heart bleeds for anyone who can relate to these videos. It’s a hard way to live. I love you all and I hope we can all find peace and heal
It’s hard to tell someone you love with bipolar that they are being hurtful or mean to you, and they don’t have the clarity or awareness to take the feedback and work on it, and instead act more aggressively and harshly and make you seem like the crazy judgmental person. It’s so contradictory to how they tell us to give them feedback, but in the middle of an episode, you give feedback and it backfires. I’m really struggling right now, with a fiancé who in anger and mania called off our wedding and left me to pick up the pieces, call vendors and make the announcement to family and friends, meanwhile I’m upset and sad and trying to act with forgiveness and empathy. Meanwhile they seem like theyre having the best time of their life with zero accountability or responsibility to others, spending money and acting like they’re single as if they weren’t going to get married in three months, it’s so hard, I hate this disorder, I hate it so much, it has tested my patience, my limits at forgiveness while also balancing my own boundaries, how to be and remain loving towards a partner who is acting against you, how do you even plan a wedding when you don’t know if an episode will occur and will completely destroy all plans? How do you plan for anything two months in advance since they can be so prone to suddenly cancelling or abandoning plans?! 😣😔 I want to help my partner but I feel powerless and helpless when I’m constantly pushed away, so I remain on the side just waiting and hoping.
@@libramagyk”we”? As in folks with bipolar disorder? 😢I don’t want to run, I want to be there for those I love, and if they happen to struggle with an illness, I don’t want that to be a limiting factor for me to love them. I myself have depression and I’ve cut contact with people during my episodes, feeling like a burden to them or feeling like I don’t deserve any love or good in my life, so I do those things like doing them a “favor” and later I realize that’s not fair and it only hurts me more. That’s why I don’t want to run. Everyone deserves to be loved fully. Yes boundaries and limits are important, but so is patience, compassion, and just being there.
@beesonpetals7154, I find myself in a similar situation. It's astonishing how much patience and forgiveness I've discovered within myself, becoming a source for all the anger and frustration.
@beesonpetals7154 are there online communities where people share their experiences and provide support for those dealing with similar challenges? It might be beneficial for us to explore those and find some like-minded individuals who can relate to our situations 😢
My fiance just left me and our boys. He's been in a loop of I love you I don't love you and I just need to move out. It's heartbreaking to have to let go but it's not ok to continue hurting over and over
It’s ok to be heartbroken, it’s ok to feel hurt and angry. Sending love and I hope you are in a better space.
I have bipolar 2 and I tell my boyfriend that “when I’m depressed, I can’t be as lovey-dovey as when I am in hypomania. But that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. So please know that I love you no differently. I have low self esteem and be skeptical but I love you.”
That is so awesome! It's so crucial for us to communicate to our loved ones, especially when we are in a more state and better able to having those kind of discussions. Awesome! 🤗🙏🌞
- Rob
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Seriously, resonates self esteem and skeptical, the wrong people around us tend to take advantage of us. And then emotional reactions I feel are others faults, but maybe I also was cruel with people I care about. I’m not sure.
That is great that you get it ! Probably means your relationship will work !
This is really mature. Thank you !
My partner also has bipolar 2, and during hypomania, which seems to happen every year in the spring, he will suddenly grow cold and distant, irritable, and also suddenly break up with me, but then a week later may say I love you. It’s a lot of back and forth. Does this sound like normal typical hypomanic behavior? Have you done this to your boyfriend? I can’t count how many times I’ve been broken up with within a single month.
It’s all about walking on eggshells for those who love you and it’s something that deserves a lot of respect and praise for those who are always there for you! Make sure you let them know you love them and teach them how they can help! They want to know!
True, however, some people Don’t care & Don’t want to help. That’s reality too.
I believe my Mom has had bipolar since I was young but haven’t got a diagnosis… I started showing signs after traumatic events in childhood & teenage years… I have BP 1 & she doesn’t understand it & wounds me with her words & it was awful last Friday… I was crying talking about missing my husband who passed & she didn’t say a word all the way home in the car & I wanted & needed nurturing & told her please say something & she said she was afraid she’d say the wrong thing because of past times how I reacted so I felt unloved & abandoned & rejected. She sent on & on for about 15 minutes & didn’t end well… I want so badly a good relationship with her. I love her! She’s going to be 90 soon & I don’t ever want that to happen again!!! She has a heart condition & I just do not want to upset her ever again!!! This time it was her getting defensive saying she can’t be the Mom I need her to be… & she never knows what to say… all I needed was a hug & an I’m sorry you feel this way… is there anything I can do… that’s not hard! She said she was stupid & didn’t have a Psychiatry degree & didn’t know how to handle me & other stuff like you are probably going to feel this way the rest of your life so you have to deal with it…
I think she meant grieving and or the BO depression… she has said also I don’t have it so bad & there’s a lot more people worse off & count your blessings or look at so & so… you don’t see them complaining… pray more, complain less…. SOMEBODY , give me something to help with communication between us or send me a video I can send her… I sent her the 10 thing to say & not to say etc… thank you for listening🙏🏼❤️🩹
The hardest thing living with my bipolar family member, is losing them. They're a different person and it's like a stranger in the house, sometimes for weeks. Almost 23 years living around Bipolar.😮
what to do so as to treat them or make them heal?
It really is like that. A person you don't recognize!
When someone I love understands bipolar I do so much better!
When they don't understand it well, but BELIEVE the diagnosis, I do OK.
If they challenge it, mock me, or think I'm just crazy...well that's the biggest trigger of all.
I felt defensive of this in my younger years as I wasn't convinced I had bipolar myself, even after being diagnosed and hospitalized.
Then I came to realize I did indeed have bipolar, but couldn't find the line between what I could control and what I couldn't.
What was I responsible for? What was I not?
Here's what I learned: I'm responsible for taking good care of myself best I can. I'm responsible for everything really...except the intense FEELINGS-that's my chemistry's fault. SO I STOPPED ACTING ON THEM!...I SIMPLY STOPPED.
I sat quietly in my enormous discomfort. That took practice, practice, practice.
I offered an explanation to those close to me and asked for simple support, often just for time alone.
If someone didn't believe me or made me feel less-than, I offered no defense. I know it's real and that's all that matters.
I learned how to appologize for my mistakes during the toughest of times. Not because I did things on purpose (I'm bipolar) but because I (or my bipolar) hurt someone. But It doesn't matter which. Hurt is hurt...and I am sorry.
Then I grew to realize that just getting thru an episode with dignity strengthened me a great deal.
Now I cause alot less hurt...alot less.
what to do sa as a bipolar change into good person so as not to be harassed verbally or hurting someone?
😭felt
That's amazing!
Amazing
Awww thank you for being here my friend I appreciate you very much !!😢❤❤❤❤
I really tried to "hang in" with my friend. I knew he was bi polar. I understood his symptoms. But, I could no longer take his abuse. It was emotional and very hurtful. I had to walk, for my sanity. I tried. I really did.
I feel you 💔😔
Even tho it wasnt his intention you did the right thing. I think i m like this and i hurt my friend without knowing it. I finally figured it out why they stopped talking to me and it was my fault. Poor girl 😞
2 ppl household plus addiction on that end as well & I'm exactly there.
Nope, nope & more nope.
I'll still be there (because we became family), but NOT under my roof. I've been done & I need to focus on my own issues.
Got tired of exactly what Rob said "I'm sorry, act like nothing happened" after all the damage only to then continue doing it over n over n over n over again.
No... just no.
I keep expressing it, but can't wait any longer... must make it happen.
If he doesn't believe me that's his issue & not my responsibility.
I don't want him to be stuck, but he has to make sure he's not. Not me.
Anyway, I totally understand you.
Again, I'm still there, but not under same roof.
The better I am the better n more I can help him, but from afar.
Me too exactly! Happy he's out of his depression, but at the same time, sorry for our relationship.
I can relate to this. My DIL is bipolar. Physically and mentally abusive. I cant stand her.
Thank you for these videos. As someone who struggles with Bipolar disorder I find your videos give me a moment of relief, just knowing I'm not alone in this.
YES!!! That's the reason why I'm so motivated to do this... I remember how much I appreciated those who were there for me, so I can return some of the favor ;)
This channel has been a dream for a long time =)
No reply.
I agree with you 100% I live with type 1 bi polar and I am dying to have a community of other bi polar cases. I cannot keep hearing the garbage modern medicine keeps trying to spoon feed us. First person experience is the only way to learn this beast, so I am building a community of bi polar people to grow together. Feel free to stop in and chat, man. The more the word gets out the more people can get connected. Blessings!
How did you manage to get the courage to come out in the open? There is so much stigma and taboo about this condition. That makes it so sad. How does one work on that aspect - I mean when someone close such as a narcissistic spouse who ridicules you, does gas lighting and reminds you over and over again that there is a condition.
@@iceboxworldmissions9782 this is wonderful. 😊
I have hurt my family so much with my words or tone. It weighs on my heart so much. They deserve so much better. I keep pressing forward.
How should they react to your anger and bad words? I'm dying inside, the way my bf talks to me, I don't know how to make him feel better and help him.
All my life I've been wondering why people hate me and why I hate people. Then when I was told by the doctor that I have bipolar, I just isolated myself it truly affected everything. I felt like I am a bomb to any place I go to and I might explode anytime. Thank you very much for creating this video. I'll do all your tips and we'll see how it'll change my life. I'm hoping for a positive outcome.
Did your life improve?
My daughter is battling this. I am trying to get her to be the Observer and to recognize when these feelings arise. Step back and try to be the Observer of what is happening and to adjust accordingly. Good luck. God Bless
Seems to run in the family Of course with my children I got to I get the blame She was no walk in the park Heard of overeaters anonymous meetings Manic Fools Rush in
If it was 200 years earlier I would be on the planes on a horse backwards Waving at Cynthia and Parker
Bipolar has nothing to do with being misanthropic.
Many people with bipolar are VERY loving and love others.
The problem is that the anger and depression can lead to harming loved ones.
Straight up admitting that you are not in a good mental place to talk is so helpful. If I can avoid a triggering conversation because I know it will put me in a bad place it’s like a lifesaver.
Great tips, thank you Rob. I also really like reading through the comments where sometimes people share their coping strategies... real life examples help! My heart goes out to all who live with bipolar - those actively working on managing it, those in denial, and those who are simply unaware of what's wrong. The Polar Warriors channel can be a game changer.
I wish my ex-husband of 12 years would have found your videos before he killed all we had. All I can do now is try to pick up all the broken pieces and I don't really know how.
I hope u are okay now
Hi.. I have been watching your videos for 2 days.. I’m so glad I found you.. I was diagnosed with clinical depression a long time ago.. I will be 50 on the 13th, because of the depression I started self medicating for the past 3 years on and off.. in the process I have lost my job and car in 2016... my children are grown now and it’s just me and my Yorkie Poodle.. but after watching your videos.. I finally got the courage to call and make an appointment to see a therapist on the 9th.. thank you so much for sharing.. and It’s good to know that I’m not alone.. so please keep sharing!!
Tammie White sending much ❤️
I hope your journey has been a positive one this past year!
Tammie White I hope your journey is going well. Never give up no matter what because you matter so much.
I lost costody of my two boy 6 years ago and I started a treatment medication and now evrithing is better but is a battle be positive and for ale ur madicacion
I think you’re great. My family has never taken the time to educate them self on bipolar one. Today, Mother’s Day, I sent my daughter 2of your videos and I sent my partner three or four. My partner was immediately responsive. He came to me and hugged me and cried. Let me tell you he’s never liked it when I cry. I’m crying now. I’ve been checking out videos because I have a lot to offer. I can certainly say I’m text book. I say that because in my abnormal psychology class my instructor told all about me then and today. I’ve moved out of state twice now to get away from my family. And x laws. I’m 57 and waiting to see if my son and new daughter in law text me...god forbid a call to say happy Mother’s Day. I’m preparing myself. Last year he waited until almost midnight. So today is a huge trigger day. Thanks for your help.
I am bipolar I with rapidcycling. My poor boyfriend is rightly fed up with my crashes. He is my calm, but when I don't get to talk to him, I crash harder. I don't know how to explain to him that sometimes all I need to know is that he is there. My own mind produces assumptions that he doesn't want to be with me when he is just busy. I know I can't be with him 24/7, but I make it such a big deal when it really isn't. I am scared to lose him because of my cycles. I have identified most of my triggers and even larger master triggers but could you make a video for loved ones on how to deal with us when we are cycling or in one state or the other. Especially for those of us that shouldn't be left alone to our own vices and minds.
AJ Deveraux that is a wonderful comment. I’m so glad that you shared all of that and what you described is very common for both us and our partners. It really takes both people to make a relationship successful with someone who has bipolar disorder... we have to become really aware of how our symptoms affect our partner and make sure we do everything to prevent symptoms... our partners have to become educated about bipolar disorder so they know the difference between symptoms of an illness, compared to just taking everything personally. There is so much I can say about this and I will do my best to make a video like you recommended. For now, here are a couple of videos I made that might help:
ruclips.net/video/14b-xeAzwB0/видео.html
ruclips.net/video/JPXq2g05JhM/видео.html
There is also a book I would like to recommend to you that has really changed my life and especially relationships. It’s called “loving someone with bipolar disorder” by Julie Fast. You can grab a cheap used copy on eBay if you’d like. It’s an amazing book for us and our partners. I couldn’t recommend it enough. I hope that helps a little bit and stop back by my channel again.
I’m experiencing the very similar thing. It’s exhausting
Does bipolar cause teouble thinking
Does bipolar cause teouble thinking
You are so spot on..it is something l learnt to do early on..to remove myself from a bad situation when l might lose the plot. It is so easy to react in anger rather than try to control ourselves..one thing that my family and friends agree with about me is that my ' yes' means 'YES' and my ' no' means 'NO'!..lf l say l will do something l carry it through..my word is my bond. Mind you it is very difficult at first, with our impulsive ways and racing thoughts..takes a while to do. One thing though, always keep a sense of humour, and keep trying. If you're running a race and trip over, you don't lie there forever..you get back up and keep going x
Krazy Kris Fantastic comment! Thank you so much for the kind words and for taking the time to watch my video. It has been so awesome connecting with other people who share the same struggles and just being able to help others. I hope you are having a peaceful week and feeling well my friend :-)
-Robert
Very helpful to family supporters living with a Bipolar family member.
I have a suggestion that I discovered by accident. I often shop on the Home Shopping Networks on T.V. & often talk on the air. Well one time while they had me on hold to give a testimonial, I thought it would be fun to record it. (& they often will say," remember to keep it short, 1 or 2 minutes." & I really thought I did. WELL, when I heard myself on the air, I could not believe my ears. The poor host could not get one word in. She was very calm, & said thank U so much 4 your call, more than once . She thanked me & said goodbye, I was talking so much & so fast I continued to talk about another 10, or 15 min longer not knowing she said goodbye UNTIL I watched the recording.!st of all it took her a good 5 min to hang up without it looking like they had to cute me off, then I continued. I'm not suggesting U record yourself on the air, BUT do have a loved one record U when U R manic. We know we R bad, but not this bad. At least I didn't. I have bipolar 1 by the way :(
I just found your channel and wish my partner and I had your videos as a resource long ago. They are so on point. I left him a few weeks ago after 8 years and it sucks, I really didn't want to have to go. But admitting you have a condition and then taking responsibility for yourself is so key. Otherwise you just keep fighting over the same old things, which really aren't real anyway since its stuff fabricated from a mental condition. Its not solvable you have to get to the core which is management and treatment, then handling the bad days best you can. Apologizing with grace and not taking your loved ones for granted. Maybe that is what makes the difference between a toxic relationship and not toxic, toxic you dont take responsibility for yourself and not toxic the bad shit still happens sometimes but you do take responsibility for yourself. I dont know, it really pains me to be a mental health advocate but have to leave my parter becuase of his condition, which was making me literally sick with stress. I had to go to save myself and be safe. I wish eveyone the best in their relationships, even in therapy I felt we needed so much more help. 1 hour therapy every couple weeks is like swimming in quicksand.
Did you guys ever get back? I’m curious how it ended. I just left my partner feeling the same thing as you. It made sick and very stressed…
Thank you for this. You are doing a great thing for the bipolar community. Bless you.
Thank you so much for your kind comment Allen! :) We appreciate it. If you haven't yet, I'd encourage you to check out Rob's private community on Patreon. He posts exclusive content there of a more personal nature and members can contact him directly through that platform. I'll include the link so you can check it out! I hope your week is off to a good start :) Take care. -Rachel (Polar Warriors team member)
www.Patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Dealing with adult child with bipolar can be very very stressful and sometimes extremely painful experiences, when he or she is having his manic depression episode, they use parents as easy target, making up stories, launching personal attacks, blaming parents for their miseries, to me, enough is enough, it has been affecting me tremendously, I finally decided to set up boundaries and keep distance from my abusive adult child, because I need to think about my own well being also. Sure we parents should have compassion for our mentally ill adult children, but it is just not fair to put us through such endless abuses that is literally destroying our life, I feel such emotional pain she put on me is beyond any language descriptions.
Hi
I am very sorry that you have been going through this. I have two siblings with severe conditions of BPD one of which is in her 50s and it’s just now being diagnosed. I’ve been subject to abuse by one of my siblings, and it just seems like there are patterns in a BPD patients that they exhibit even on medication and I feel like that’s why therapy is very important. I’m trying to learn how to hold my BPD family members accountable. I noticed patterns in their behavior that are similar. It’s very tough to maintain close relationships with them because they’re unhealthy and on and off medication. It is sad and I pray for us all.
FINALLY SOMEONE WHO CAN SEE THE TURMOIL I GO THRU DAILY..THANK YOU AND KEEP THOSE VIDEOS COMING...THANK YOU
It’s so overwhelming to even know that you are hurting your love one. And at least is doble the work for me mentally because I don’t want to hurt but in the other hand I have this anger and sadness mix with a little bit of everything in btw that it makes me go even crazier. To you all bipolar warrior, thank you for your stories. I was diagnosed with bipolar just 3weeks ago.
Thank you so much for this video, I had difficultly understanding why I kept pushing away those so close to me constantly, over and over again. It kills me that I keep hurting those so close to me after I do the damage. This genuinely gives me a sigh of relief that something can be done to amend this issue I have, hopefully it's not too late.
My son is 20 and has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder for several years. When I speak to him in a kind way about issues with not helping with chores and I feel continuously overwhelmed, he gets argumentative and very mean. He does work and helps with bills, which I have always told him I appreciate it. I'm unable to work because my daughter is disabled and I'm her caregiver. He and I had a bad morning today because I expressed to him that I'm feeling overwhelmed and unappreciated. He told me he hasn't been pulling his weight because he hates living and is depressed. He has a therapy appointment this week and I pray that it helps. I really thought he was doing better but now, I'm unsure. It really is heartbreaking 💔
I am so sorry you're having this trouble at home. Please know you are not alone! There may be a local support group for family and friends that can help which are always free. Or consider seeing a therapist yourself. I believe everyone can benefit from it. It helps you set boundaries and how to enforce them, work on goals and of course a safe space to just talk. Everyone needs that kind of support system. If you are interested Rob offers one on one support on Patreon and we have a support group for patrons only on discord. Take gentle care!
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
@@PolarWarriors thank you so much 💗
I just wanted to say that I’m sorry that you were going through this too. One of the things I noticed about my family member with severe BPD is that they struggle to stay on their medication. This makes me watch carefully to learn their baseline behaviors, and it helps me to detect when they’re off meds.
You have the knack of articulating the life of being bipolar. Not easy to do. I have been living with this type of Mental Illness for 47 years and it's such a hard illness to describe to family and loved ones.
From a guy who has been in the hospital a few times over 25 years, your knowledge of bipolar is off the charts!
My now 42 y.o. daughter has been Bipolar for more years than I realized. I thought she was a free spirit. I’m more educated now. Thank you for your videos 😍😍😍
this explains a lot thanks for this i hurt and said things to friends and loved ones that i never ment in blind rage then said sorry after when i came to my senses and people say you just need to have control except they dont understand its not that easy in the moment for us.
Dude if your seeing this I want you to know you saved my relationship ❤️
Alex Rodriguez I’m so happy to hear that! Maybe consider checking out our Patreon community. I hope you have a wonderful start to your week :-)
Yes thank you my relationship was on the brink and I hope that I can save it knowing this
this brought me to tears I cant believe I'm genuinely not alone
I keep a rant journal and a gratitude journal in notes app. in my phone. So when I get super upset I can yell at my phone and keep those notes about why I was upset and not yell at somebody else and not send a bad text to someone. I try to put things that I feel happy and joyful about in my gratitude journal and I can go over them both later on when I feel better to see how irrational I’ve been being or if I am actually feeling well because all I put in was gratitude. I also keep notes about what I want to talk to people about when they’re not around where I can’t talk right away.I do this so I won’t forget what issues I’m upset about or things that I want to praise or compliment a family member on. I seem to forget constantly.
After 18 years shrink talk lots of fifferent medication .i found your channel. 14 3 2018.at this moment i am manic and listen video after video and you are telling me more than the shrinks tried for 18 yeasrs.thank you so much to educate people with BP or people who wanna know more about it.very usefull.
bianca dongen i’m so glad that you found my channel! I have gone through the same thing… Trying to find a really good doctor shouldn’t be as hard as it is. One of the reasons why I started this channel was to fill a very obvious a gap in information. I will have lots more videos to come, so stop back by anytime. You are very welcome here :-)
Edit: I did it you guys. I took my first step and went to see the drs to get myself help.
I'm glad I found your channel tonight. I'm undiagnosed. I been treating her like crap.. say mean things to her just for no reason. I was stuck in the I'm cycle. She told me one night that I might be bi polar and to get an evolution. I never did I said I'll go multiple times but never gone thru with it. She wanted to get help. I self medicated myself with alcohol/drugs. For years. But it has climaxed this past Saturday. I ended up doing something bad when I was in angry mood. She has since pushed me out of her life and doesn't want me around. The sorry cycle got old and I'm not seeking help. Today I'm calling my local clinic to make an appt. I'm hoping the can squeeze me in today. I want to get better and learn how to have healthy balanced lifestyle. She means everything to me. It sucks I had fuck up.. after fuck up till I majorly fucked up to decide enough is enough.
I just want to say thank you 💕 for so long my husband and I have struggled but I know he loves me very much. Long story story (very long made very short lol) we now understand better why we struggle. Your videos are truly helping me understand him so much better and how I can support him and our family 💓
I'm in the same place. I hope you and your husband are still doing well together.
I’ve hurt so many I love. Especially my husband of 9 years. I’m a rageaholic. I’m crashing hard right now. I so want to do better!I’m realizing my medication isn’t working and I need to get it fixed. I need to talk to my therapist soon. I think my mom is bipolar but undiagnosed. She goes into these mean moods much like me or she gets into these crazy shopping moods. It’s like watching myself watching my mom with these moods. Thank you so much!
Very helpful valuable advice. My daughter has managed in highly responsible way her bipolar disorder for 20 years.. she was diagnosed at 16. Life has often been hard for her. I have not always been helpful.. taking very personally things she has said and done when on the emotional rollercoaster. Best advice.. just take a break … no interaction at those times seems to do any good.. wait for the anger to pass.
You are doing such important work , Rob. Thank you
Hi, Rob offers one on one support on Patreon if you are interested. He also posts more personal information about his day to day struggles like his recent hospital stay. For the month of July he is offering free phone calls to patrons. Another Patreon exclusive is Rob hosting and moderating weekly support groups on discord! Take gentle care! 🙏
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Same too, it’s horrible & really resent my mood changes & lost people I love simply because of it. Thank you for your supportive videos they help.
I'm learning so much. Your Education is heart felt and gives insight to both caregivers and one's with the bipolar.
Thank you so much for the kind words Tammy. I’m really glad I saw your comment. Do stop by the channel again sometime. 😊😊☀️☀️
-Rob
I'm trying to educate myself to understand what a Bipolar Person is going through. I really care for someone that is Bipolar... But he isn't open to talk to me about it. Keeps pushing me away. Takes one step forward to me and the next day 10 steps back. Your videos gave me a chance to look inside of his mind. Thank you so much
I think I am going through the same thing can you tell me how he reacts or how can I know my bf has these bp symptoms?
I am very manic depressive I absolutely ADORE you you always explain Everything so well that I never know how to explain to someone
Hi Rob
your videos are helping me when my bipolar husband is being nasty and aggitated, when I start to feel angry with him I play your videos and they make me calm down and remember this is not my loving husband at the moment but I know he will be back!
I've sent some of your videos to our family and friends so they can understand why he gets angry with them.
You're an inspiration and thank you! thank you! for your time to do this it's helped me so much.
Lots of Love to you
Sharon ♥️♥️
Thanks Rob before I was outside looking in now I'm inside looking out
Thank you so much for this video this is literally what I’ve been doing lately. My boyfriend treats me so well and does so much for me everyday. He cleans up my messes when I’ve been depressive, he listens to my manic rants and wild ideas. But he also tries to show me the logic past my emotions. Which of course triggers me and makes me feel like he doesn’t care about my feelings.
He is also bipolar but he has been on medication for 3 years and uses daily exercise as his main outlet. He has created a daily routine he must stick to or else he pays for it later by drawing his bad feelings in alcohol or just being irritable with everyone. I have recently been diagnosed and he is watching me struggle through all that he went through. I take out all my bad moods on him… my mind takes me into a dark paranoid place where everyone is out to get me.. it’s starting to take a huge toll on our relationship and I really don’t want to lose him. I’m going to try the things you said here in this video. Please make more you’re so helpful I appreciate you!
You're so awesome you're helping me so much in how to be around my bipolar friend, thanks 👍🙏
I just found this channel and I've watched several videos already and I absolutely love it. It's so so helpful. I've struggled with bipolar disorder 2 for about 4 years now (it got bad about 4 years ago anyways) and these videos help me with so many aspects of it not to mention how they explain so many things that I never understood before. Like the emotional drive by. I lost so many people from that and at the time I never realized what I was doing or how often. I almost lost my best friend. We're still close but our relationship will never be the same. When that was happening I didn't even know I had bipolar disorder. I was going through so much and I only felt comfortable sharing it with her but when I was so low in my depressive state I couldn't seem to consider what she was going through. I'm subscribing right now. Great job and keep it up!
Did you get any help?
Thanx man for doing these videos!! You have no idea how much I like them and get alot out of them. With this video you mentioned family? What if you don’t have a nurturing loving family that treats you with respect and cares what your going through. If you don’t like I do, just remember your not a punching bag and if their hurting you, you have to do something about it. In my family (mom and dad are gone now) it’s just my brother and two sisters. THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT BIPOLAR IS. To them I am a screw up and I need to be treated like a child. I realized they will not change and I got them out of my life. My life got better when I did that. You have to surround yourself with positive loving people. Get the dirt out of your life!!! Move on!!! Get a good therapist, read positive books, find loving friends, eat healthy and spend time in nature where you can find yourself but you don’t have to be a punching bag!!!!
Unfortunately I always fall back to the same pattern. I treat the people I love the most like shit, I am taking my medications regularly but it doesn't always help. When anger gets the best of me I lose control of myself, it is like having a big monster inside yourself that can suddenly ruin years of efforts.
Hi
I hope you are doing better. I’m not sure if this is a part of my family members BPD, but she has expressed pleasure in hurting other people in the family. I’m trying to figure out ways to hold her accountable for her behavior, especially the hurtful stuff and I’m also trying to understand why .
When I’m learning, it’s that you can have BPD and other types of disorders at the same time. But I’m praying for her and I’m praying for you too.
Thank you for making thesd, ive been in a relationship now for 2 years with someone who is bipolar and just recently figured out and learned that they have this condition and these videos are teaching me a lot and help me know that I can keep the relationship going and she also will learning a lot and hopefully we can make things work out
What's the update? How did it work out
@@Azav312 5 years now and she's horton much better and still together raising our 4yo daughter
@@bodavis87 that's great to hear. I had a similar story to yours but mine denied getting treatment. She sabatoged our relationship 2 years in. But your story gave me hope for her in the future.
My first reaction is to say “I love you, but I think you are having an episode today and I don’t want it to damage our relationship by what you might say or how you might treat me” and to leave for the day. Is that okay? I don’t want to “abandon” him but I feel like it’s the only thing to keep us out of that “I hate you, now I’m sorry” cycle. I try to be supportive some days but others I feel like it’s smart to remove myself until he comes out of it.
It always depends on the person. If your significant other can trust you, yes I think it's a good option.
I had this cycle in my last relationship, but in the end we broke up.
She couldn't take me any longer but also didn't said what she thought.
I think being open and honest is a important factor in a healthy relationship.
I honestly am so tired of trying to manage this emotional rollercoaster especially being an empath, I am just numb and living this way is nonsense. There doesnt really seem to be a way to find balance and even more frustrating a purpose to not only put myself through constant misery but my family and friends as well. Why does it have tp be this way!😔
Feeling the same no doubt
Feeling the same way... I hate this crap
Empaths need rest and/or isolation to regroup, meditate & recharge.
It's a lot & many don't understand.
I am living through the same thing. I have struggled my whole life with this condition. I cant seem to find a way out of it. Everything I try to do seems to fail and it feels like there is no end. I've been to soooo many doctors and none of the meds help me. they tend to make it worse. I have trouble finding anyone to talk to because I just cant explain myself to anyone properly and I just end up hurting their feelings. School and the pursuit of education has been nearly impossible for me and I'm struggling to find my place in this world. Its just hard when you feel like you don't belong anywhere. I had an alcohol problem for years and I managed to get sober and I have been able to stay sober for 7 years now. But I lost all my friends and social circle due to that. currently it has gotten so bad that I am unemployed and I'm trying to make a living doing other things. I feel for anyone who has to endure this condition. If you are suffering the same way I am, I am really sorry. This channel is really helping me understand myself and these videos are helping my family better understand me. Honestly, I really look up to channels like this. It makes it seem like its possible to get out of this and live a normal life. As impossible as it may seem I will keep fighting and I wont give up or give in to these feelings. I hope each and everyone going through this makes it through.
I relate to this so much. The same has been happening to me. It feels like there is no hope. I have thoughts of killing myself so I can no longer hurt anyone else ever again. It’s dreadful. I’m only 21, and I know that I will have many more episodes and hurt more people. Because of this, I have made it my life’s mission to serve humanity in any way I can. I’ll use my highs to be creative and make people smile. In my lows, I will withdraw myself and deal with the pain alone. I’m ready to accept the suffering and do my best. I will fight for my people, the people who struggle everyday with Bipolar. Until the day I die, I won’t stop looking for a solution. I love you all and take care of yourselves.
Your videos and my diagnosis is lots of years to late. But, keep up the great video's, I feel there is alot of us out there but we just dont realise it yet. Depression is such a cruel disease. Good luck to ALL who suffer.
Life saving and a relief to hear
It is so sad that we won't be knowing what we are doing while hurting them and when we become ok..all you can see is your worst mistakes and guilt
If I make a mistake in the house, I apologize. If not accepted- I go off the rails and then he tries to be nice, I then cannot stand to talk to him. This never ends. He says he understands and I believe him but then.... if he doesn't understand 100% I'm furious!! How CAN HE understand how my head and thoughts are feeling?? He needs to be more gentle, and I have to remind him of that. I'm very fragile, really. He's the most patient person I've ever met. I'm so sorry I'm me. I don't want to hurt him anymore!!! I always tell him later that it was a bp outburst, if it was. Thank you for all of your life saving vids. xx
Rob is always recommending Julie Fast's book, How to love someone with Bipolar. He is also offering one on one coaching on Patreon and our new polar warriors website.
Dianna polar warriors team member
Rob, I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
You are an angel... thank you! My son is so grateful for the tools that you’ve given him through me!
Another great video. Learning a lot. Both of my adult children diagnosed with bipolar. They pain is real! Thank you!
You are so very welcome Edna. Thanks for being a part of my channel and community here =)
-Rob
Thankyou for the video ,I'm the spouse to a bi polar sufferer.I feel like a punching bag. And I think understanding is taking its toll. Loving a person with BiPolar ,has a huge impact on my life .The relationship itself has much love ,but you have be very strong to deal with the symptoms.I feel incredible pain ,confusion, frustration ,and sometimes betrayal.Often when the negativity hits in and its like this horrible person replaces my spouse, its like being in a hell pit without escape. Thankyou for sharing your input ,because I struggle to sometimes understand where the explosion comes from or to understand his struggle. I hope one day there is a cure ,where people can live in less confusion
Im so sorry. I drove my husband away 20 years ago with uncontrollable verbal assaults. At the time even though I felt terrible about the things I screamed at him was too ashamed to say Im sorry. Did not know bipolar was attached to me at the time. I feel guilty often about the pain I caused him when he once loved me so much. I honestly loved him with all my heart but demonstrated the opposite for many years. He was safe and got comfortable letting it all out with him thinking hes my person forever. I had no control over my outbursts and he set no boundaries. Set boundaries for him. God bless
So far, I can so relate to you, and the states you describe regarding bipolar and what it does to you. You seem to be hitting all of the familiar nuances of this miserable illness all too well. Please keep it up. You GET it. Doctors do not. MY psych doc told me that happiness was a "choice". I told him he didn't understand what bipolar really felt like. Stalemate.
There are so many horrible doctors out there. They are often put on pedestals and so many people trust their word like it's the final answer... Very scary. I've experienced the same frustration with doctors who read just a page about Bipolar Disorder in medical school. I'm so sorry you had to hear those words from a "medical professional." I'd recommend finding a doctor that has extensive experience with Bipolar Disorder. They would never say something like happiness being a choice. I'm glad you found my channel =) =)
-Rob
My Fiance and I parted ways because of this problem. I went to school and majored in Psychology! After being together for years I couldn't take it anymore!! The same Repetitive Behavior as a Man It's hard to put pride to the side but I did.... Their's 2 places where you will have peace the (Grave) And (Home)... Your videos are definitely helping others... Thanks
Amazing how you talk so calm and soft. That calms me. Thank you. I feel there is hope.
I love this woman so much an not having her is pushing me to anger
I think what your doing is amazing ive been seeing a girl for 3 months who has bipolar and its difficult to say the least where no longer together i said I would be there for her but she didn't want to continue this gives me a lot of clarity from her point of view so thank you
Polar Warrior your videos are amazing. So grounded and clear, 1st hand advice that is very insightful. I was in a 12 year relationship with a man who was talented, gentle and then cruel and I suspect bipolar. He would not get help despite the obvious pattern his moods would take. He choose to mask with alcohol and other painful behavior. He ended his life 4 years after I left and that is still devastating. I've wondered what I could have done differently. Your insights are so helpful.
Gosh, I am so sorry Leslie! So many of us Bipolar folk are gone too soon. Thank you for sharing. Take gentle care🙏🏻
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I've hurt so many that I love and tbh you've helped me a lot by watching this video and listening to this advice but like seriously you've helped me like a lot
Glad I could help Alex!
You’re videos have helped me so much. Thank you and please keep up the great work. My father sat down with me and I’m almost 30 years old and watched your videos with me. It helped him to better understand me and that means SO much for someone who constantly suffers day to day with Bipolar 1 with rapid cycling and Borderline personality disorder.
Wow! Thank you soooo much for sharing that🙏
Relief to find Polar Worriors
You put my entire brain into words. It’s hard coming to terms with knowing your toxic tendencies and not always being able to control them. I take responsibility for my disorder and try to do well...but sometimes I slip through those cracks, it’s a horrible illness. I have hurt so many and been hurt.
Thank you I’ve recently had a falling out with someone who struggles with bpd and watching these videos had give me a better understanding on what’s been going on and also how i can improve my responses i appreciate that you take your time to make these
behindthedope I need to ask someone else that has bipolar, can you love people? I feel like I can’t love anyone but myself
Thank you for caring and your response. I think what you are doing is so amazing. I recommended your channel to my Dr. Told her to check it out and maybe it can help someone else too.
Very grateful, thank you
Thank you for your absolutely incredibly, informative videos. You really are an amazing human being for sharing everything about this subject. You really have helped me to understand and love someone unconditionally, with a bipolar disorder.
Once again some help from polar warriors! Thank you.
rebquist rebquist Of course! Thank you so very much for being such an active commenter on my channel. I really appreciate the support my friend :-)
another amazing video keep it up
I am BLESSED that I discovered your videos...Thanks loads
I watch your videos. I believe this one was the most helpful, thus fur.
You are awesome. Please continue . You have no idea how much you are helping me.
God bless
Susan Leftwich Thank you so much Susan and a very warm welcome to my channel. I’m so glad the videos are helping and God bless :-)
thanks Robert for your great videos on manic depression.They have a lot of information about our disorder and solutions to apply during different different situations during the life long times of our disease. You are clear and calm in your understanding of it. you say what I cannot verbalize at times. You are a real joy to see and listen to, Frank O,Donohue'
Frank O'Donohue Thank you so much for the wonderful comment Frank and for supporting my channel. It feels really good to help other people not suffer quite as much as I have. We all breathe the same air! Stop back by anytime my friend :-)
Thank you for all of these amazing videos, so helpful as someone who's trying to support a friend who believes he may have BPD. He can be really abrasive for no apparent reason. And he tends to shut down/withdraw. He's told me more than once not to take his behavior personally. I'm conflict-avoidant by nature, but don't want to have resentment build up because I'm afraid to tell him how hurtful his behavior can be. I've told him I'd appreciate him saying he's really struggling & needs space vs. just disappearing for days or weeks.
Every day I watch a video or 2 and take notes, or I will watch them at night and sleep on the thought then get back to them in the morning and watch them again and take notes. Your channel has helped me to get to know what Bipolar is. You are so helpful and you have a coming presents.
I have been struggling with this for my hole life and have been miss diagnosed many times. When I came across your channel and I watched the first 3 episodes. You described me and I was in awe. Because finally there was some one out there that was like me. So thank you again Rob.
Awe - you are so very welcome Shelly! I'm so glad you are here too. Stop by anytime my fellow Polar Warrior! =)
-Rob
Hi :) Your testimonies help me and my partner live normally. I love my partner so much.
Thanks Again and Keep Inspiring Others!
Paul John Auditor you are so very welcome and I’m glad you found my channel! I’m so glad it’s helping your relationship and stop by anytime :-)
Starting this channel has been hugely helpful for my own relationship too. My partner has been amazingly supportive :-)
My goodness. You are outstanding at explaining the inner workings of illness and effects on relationship. And your recommendations are so helpful. I am watching in hopes too learn how to better work with my grandchildren mother. Who has been is currently in denial of her extreme bipolar illness. If only she could see your videos. I think you give much hope and clarity too all people involved in the emotional Rollercoaster of being bipolar or loving someone who does.
GOD Bless You Sir!
I just get so f***ing angry when they don't understand what I'm going through or it's too much for them or they're scared about it. Part of me knows it's not right but I just don't want to be the one comforting them when I am the one going through the pain.
Savannah Bluford so you’re bipolar and selfish. Makes sense
I think that my bipolar brother feels that I deserve to be treated badly because according to him, he is the one who has the right to hurt me He is always right and of course what i feel or think or do doesn't really matter. He has never apologized to me for being a jerk. I know he is sick, but my heart doesn't recognize that when he uses me as his punching bag.
I rant away 3000 miles and 4 years live totally alone,to not hurt anyone,it's my disorder,no one else should suffer,I downgraded my jobs,now working as delivery man ( art director in past),only after 3,5 years start to understand that they miss me and that hurts,they don't know anything ,but to me it's safer like this,then live in that surreal blaming game,I miss them sooo much,and they think I'm bad person.So miserable.
I feel you.
Your loved ones are human beings too, of course they are scared and stressed by your episodes and verbal abuses against them whenever you are feeling down, it is not fair for you to use your mental illness as excuses to hurt your loved ones, it won't resolve anything for your suffering.
Thank you. We just had a daughter together. But i know we both need time to get the negative vibes under control. Everything changes. Hopefully she and i will come back around
Thank you for sharing and shedding insight on bipolar disorder.
Thank you so much dude, this really is helpful, can’t believe some of the solution can be so simple. I got to the point where I knew I would have bad days, and was able to control myself to some degree, but it was really painful because I was still keeping it all to myself. But now I imagine that having people around who know what you are going through would alleviate a lot of that pain because you aren’t walking on eggshells so much but are instead in a supportive social environment.
PLEASE MAKE A VIDEO ON BIPOLAR DISORDER AND PARANOIA IM STRUGGLING WITH THIS AND CANT FIND ANY INFO ON IT
Samantha Vega I will definitely make a video talking about that because I struggle with that myself. When I experience a mixed state or dysphoric mania, I get paranoid about all sorts of things… Specifically the government, disease, my fears coming true, what people think about me, and so much more. What has helped me a lot is just recognizing the patterns of what I always focus on when I feel like this. Usually it’s the same few things. I get so obsessed that it’s hard to break away and just stop feeding into it (like turning off the news or not reading about negative things). That’s something I’m still working on. I will do my best to make a video talking about this soon. I have a few videos recorded that will be posted soon and a couple more to work on but I will definitely get to this topic so keep stopping by my channel :-)
Polar Warriors hey man..don't let THEIR diagnosis keep you uninformed. The government isn't our friends. This has nothing to do with paranoia, but facts that the gov is not acting in our best interest. This also seems intentionally put into these disorders because they do NOT want people questioning the government. You are not paranoid when it comes to them!
I just found your channel today and have to say it is like you are describing myself and my husband. I am actually thrilled to find this channel. It has been very enlightening and is helping me understand what is going on and how we interact with each other. And it all makes complete sense. Thank you for sharing!
I don't know if I'm bipolar, but this definitely speaks to me. My relationship just ended because I took out my frustrations on them. I always feel horrible after it, but I just don't notice myself in the moment.
I don’t know your name or I would address your personally. You are a blessing and a gift. Few people know the hell like we do. Few understand how horrible it is to be ghosted over and over and over again. The pain is extreme in proportion to our highs and lows.
I finally have a friend who wanted to tell me to back off but couldn’t. Having been down that road before, I knew where this was headed and I told her that I hear her, I see her and I honor her. I told her I would and could back off. That was Friday night 8/14. I have been down since, but I am staying true to my word and waiting for her to contact me. I did get some awesome shots of today’s sunrise and sent them on a group thread of which she is a part. But I am giving her space. Ironically, she sent an informational text yesterday to which I didn’t feel the need to respond and when she called me later on, she said she missed me. Someone once said to me, “How can I miss you if you don’t go away?” These are mixed messages, to be sure, but at 52 I have come to realize how baffling and scary this disorder is to the people who love us. She was overwhelmed by me and she remains confused.
I thanked her for setting a boundary with me. She told me that together we will find balance.
She is a gift that I treasure and I have learned to listen and look for the signs.
Blessings in you and all who suffer beside us.
So proud of you man the more i hear about your life the more my respect grows
Eres una persona muy valiosa y me haces sentir valiosa a mí misma. Muchas gracias por abrir este canal.
Thanks again for your help
I really appreciate this video. It really help me open up my eyes and help me see my wrongs and realizing I have bipolar everything he said i feel I’m sorry for the people hurt😢 I need to stop my habits
Thank you very much, it's mean a lot for me and my husband.......yes I am not alone with this problems.God bless You from Europe (Hungary)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Detti Dobrocsi i’m so glad and a very warm welcome to my channel! Stop back by anytime to learn more with me :-)
😭 your videos are helping me greatly thank you sir
U are the best. Thank you for your great support for all of us who r battling good and evil,I've learned a lot about myself,treatment is expensive,so I suffer a lot ,I feel suicidal all the time but I'm a coward,n I don't want to die,just wanna b normal,I don't take meds for it.i just isolate myself n sleep all the time,ur the only one I find help from. Bless
Cayetano Rocha I hope you feel better, try not to isolate, go for walks, meditate or find something, anything you like to do.
That deep breath was nice.
Man I have repeatedly over 21 years done the text thing and even worse it's got to a point were I have alienated everyone. I feel inside that all I have done is unforgivable I've been given chance after chance yet I still cock it all up I won't go out for weeks because I can't face anyone. I wish everyone that I have offended knew about you sir because you explain it all so well
Alan Harrison I fully understand you, I alienated family members many years ago by my actions & phone calls. Even certain friends that knew me from school age. I did try to explain & say how very sorry I was. I moved house to a different area to make a fresh start yet fall outs with toxic neighbours would start. Things are better now for me & I avoid toxic people & especially people I can't trust. The one thing amongst many that I did that helped me was to get rid & distroy my mobile phone in 2017. I have managed so well without one as I have a house phone to make & receive calls. Honestly for me it was the best thing I ever did. I'm no longer tempted to send texts in a negative way. I come from a disfunctional family & i'm the youngest of seven siblings aged 58yrs. I have had no contact with them for several years since my parents death, my life has proved much better for this as they all tried to control me & put me down because of my bipolar disorder. I've tried to tell my partners parents to watch these Polar Warriors video's yet as I was saying it to them they showed no interest & it did fall on deaf ears. Don't continue to punish yourself Alan about everyone that you have offended over time. If they really understood you they would make an effort to perhaps listen to you & your apologies. People with mental health problems are misunderstood yet many people who claim to be "Normal" have many more issues. No feelings, no empathy, selfish, hurtful, rude etc, etc, etc... Trust is the main thing in a relationship & friends etc... Be very careful who you confide in, as I did once for it to backfire on me in a bad way. It's not easy I know but maybe making new friends if you can may help you. Remember when you isolate yourself for weeks on end because you say you can't face anyone for things you've said or done. Those people won't be hiding away indoors or even giving you a second thought, only voicing their opions & gossip with others. Are these people really worth upsetting your life & sleep over? I think not..... Your comment registered with me & how I used to be & feel til I made changes in my life. Life's too short to worry about how others feel about you & more to the point stop causing yourself such unnecessary stress. Hope my comment is of some help to you, take care & be safe 🍪pocket England.
@@biscuitpocket7283 that has really hit me deeply you seem to totally understand thank you so much for them comments I I identify with everything that you say it's like exactly the same as the things I have done and you know how it is I felt like no one could understand it I'm 49 but you know I'm going to take onboard your comments thank you my friend