I have an unpopular opinion that if starving your child is abuse, over feeding your child and making them obese is also abuse. It’s your responsibility to teach your kids
As a young child, being fat is your parent’s choice. The early habits that made a child fat will lead to a very hard chain to break as an adult. But once you learn how to not be fat, it’s now a choice.
Actually there is a problem if your parents are fat/obese then genetically their children will more likely be obese so they are already at a disadvantage. The same is with children born to drug addicts.
Maybe up to being a young adult. An actual grown adult can't keep making excuses for themselves though. Their parents won't always be around. You could have had a miserable childhood but at some point you have to stand up and say, "I know my childhood sucked, but my behavior isn't helping anything."
Remember that "body positivity" was originally meant for people who were different looking (the disabled, to start), NOT for fat women who want to be lazy.
Exactly... i remember it as loving your body if you gad stretch marks as a mother, or being banana shaped rather than hourglass shaped, it was never an excuse to let yourself go and disregard your health...
If life were a videogame where you could choose your character's appearance, everyone would choose the characters that look healthy, attractive and in shape.
@@jodiperez8870 I don't know your age but for everybody works the same, there is a reason why people who have been skinny their whole life when they start getting older they begin to put on weight. Metabolism slows down with age, if you eat the same as you where eating when you were younger doesn't matter if with that exact diet you lost 120lbs it's still too much, saying things like "I would eat a healthy meal with low calories i would gain weight" is just bs and since you lost 120lbs you damn well know that already, "low calories" really means nothing unless you know what your basal metabolism is.
I was an obese teen (a little over 200lbs), and ive lost around 35lbs within the last few months. Being fat or obese was 100% a choice i made until i decided it was time for me to do something about it. I havent been this light OR happy in many years 🥰
hey good on you! kinda funny saying 200lbs is fat for me personally, but it all depends on height i guess haha. ive always felt i was on the skinny side at 200lbs(6'4")
Congrats! You’re worth feeling healthy and being able to go and do as you pls! No one has to be Victoria secret thin whatsoever and most aren’t, it’s about actually being healthy and eating right, being active and living a long life. Anyways good job
@@mitchellcolvin3844 height is the primary determining factor for what your weight should be A tall persons healthy weight is going to be above a short persons healthy weight That's common sense
Congratulations! That is no easy feat and you should feel good and proud! I was overweight for a time and I lost it in a not so healthy way (pregnancy and HG, I threw up for 9 months straight). I knew I was eating poorly, and I knew it was my fault. If I got to far I'd pull back and eat healthy until I went down a bit but it was my choice.
The first guy nailed it. The majority of it is based on habits, mental state and the will power to make changes - and unfortunately it is not as simple snapping the your fingers. You have to subconsciously want it and make the changes. It can be hard. I was at my lowest weight when I was eating more, but I was eating healthier (although harder to prep meals vs 'bad' food) and exercising. Then I had job changes, less personal time, family/kids, got older and I started getting tired....which gave me excuses to not exercise, prep food, etc... I'm almost back to the state where I'm going to make changes that push me to get back into exercise and realising that I don't eat until I'm full (meaning I've over eaten), but eat a small meal and let it settle and then realising I don't actually to eat more for that meal period.
Willpower is a limited resource, which is why good habits, filling foods, and healthy ways to deal with stress are so important. One important point is that some foods trigger binging, and some foods change your hormones, which may affect your behavior, leading to a spiral of bad diet.
Absolutely love that Brett pointed out that some of the problem is from bad information people are given about how to lose weight and what's healthy. As a personal trainer I see this so frequently; people doing so much and trying so hard but acting on bad information so not getting the results they're looking for.
I agree. Also, it seems to me like there are a lot of fake health food products now… leading people to think that they are eating a healthy snack when really it’s almost as bad as eating chips.
it's also people just doing too much at the start. Seen plenty people talk about dieting by trying to starve themselves and give up after a week. Better to cut down on 500 calories than normal and slowly work your way down
Yea losing weight is all about consistency. Consistency with _some_ exercise. Consistency with diet, especially a slight calorie deficit. The Japanese have a concept of never eating to feeling a full stomach - always eat to 70-80% full.
On the food side of things sometimes it’s switching brands. Some thing as simple as reading the back of the ice cream containers. Strawberry or coffee ice cream is going to be better than him Ben & (Hates America) Jerry’s. And low carb or keto yogurt or egg custard with stevia would be even better than ice cream. I found cashew milk mixed with macadamia nut milk a drop of liquid Stevia and black cocoa powder makes a hot cocoa that basically taste like a melted oriole.
I've been obese and super skinny. Both get talked about and aren't healthy, however I don't think *most* people would choose to be fat if they could choose to be thin overnight
yes same here. the extra weight actually does affect you physically, i find myself walking slower and having less energy 😅 although it may be due to other factors too
I honestly don't want to be skinny, because I'm older. If I could be a comfortable size 38, I'd be happy....waist size 88🎉 not impossible, but it's a head move to just do it and to make it a lifestyle choice! 👌🏼🇿🇦🎄
@@tanjasmit7535I’m glad that you added the flag because I was a bit concerned about why you would be happy to be a size 38. A size 38 in the US would be enormously huge-definitely not sold even in the plus size stores. It would be like a size 62 in South Africa whereas the size 38 in South Africa is a US 14.
I rode the bus with a kid that was at least 250. Everyone was mean to him at first, but he told us that he had a problem with his thyroid that was causing his weight gain. He got surgery done a year later and my God that boy dropped weight so fast. He's currently like 190 and still dropping pounds!! I'm so happy for him, it makes me happy to see people understand that it's not just what you eat.
Same happened to me, used to weigh 120 lbs at 5'5" then I got hashimoto's and cushing's disease in my late 20's and didn't find out about it until I hit 31. In that time I gained 150lbs. Now I am 34 and am on levothyroxine and got surgery for the cushing's and my weight is dropping pretty fast after getting those two things taken care of. If someone is not losing weight doing calorie restriction it is worth looking into internal problems.
@@CuteAnimeGirlI thyroid problems same as you, used to weight 120 now 165 😢 I am going to the gym and stopped eating things that hashimoto people cant eat even on thyroid meds
As someone who was consistently obese, it is definitely a choice. I used to be 50 pounds overweight, but I recently lost 55 pounds because it was damaging my health. Now, I have learned how to eat healthier and I hope these people will eventually make the right choice.
@@s.c.7362and like many people that bring up this kind of argument you chose to talk about an extreme condition and like brett said this a different category. We're talking about the normalization of an unhealthy lifestyle and the normalization of obesity as healthy that's what the modern body positivity movement is trying to tell us. Even when someone has a condition that causes them to be overweight they would be objectively wrong to say that their situation is healthy and could definetely make healthy choices over unhealthy ones. I don't understand people like you cannot realize that conditions are a different situation and not what we are focusing on
@@s.c.7362 obviously for some people its harder to loose weight because of health conditions like my mum can barely walk because of her back problems but she has recently started trying to loose weight and everyone has noticed a change in her sttitude she is much happier now then she was before. im not gonna sit here n say its a choice to become fat but it is definitely a choice to stay fat
I was a very skinny child. And once I started middle school I got bullied for my light weight. Kids told me I had an eating disorder and I believed it and started eating more by the end of 8th grade I was a 5 foot 130 pound girl. I joined sports and worked off the weight by 9th grade. I am finally fit and healthy again ❤
That’s strange. They kinda bullied you into having some disordered eating tendencies it sounds like. I had an eating disorder growing up. Nobody really knew and just said I must have a fast metabolism but the number of adults commenting on weight without ever actually thinking there might be something to be concerned about is a little insane. That could be said either way. If a kid is way too skinny or way too fat, don’t just assume it’s “their metabolism.”
I had a similar experience: being bullied for being very thin and wanting to gorge myself to gain weight. Thankfully i made better friends and the disordered eating didn't go on for too long. I'm sorry you had that experience, and congrats on turning it around!
As someone who went from 330 lbs to 160lbs I much prefer being skinny, when I was large I had a hard time breathing and doing literally everything I never fat shame, but being skinny feels sooo much healthier I'm gonna edit this, I used the term skinny due to the wording in her caption "would you rather be fat or skinny?"
My father died of Lupus. I watched him deal with it as a child, and I have to say... Docs said he had four years, he lived for fourteen because he exercised, ate right, laughed... He chose to be happy and healthy.
As someone who is morbidly obese, I think he hit the nail on the head when he was talking about the difficulty of choices. This doesn't just apply to weight. It is in our nature to choose what we perceive to be the easiest path. This applies to life in general, and lifestyle. Living off of credit cards and spending more than you make is typically a choice too. Yes, most people choose to be poor (there are exceptions but most people don't fit the exception). I say this as someone who has conquered several of my self imposed limitations, even if I haven't conquered them all (like my size).
100% a choice. No one naturally becomes 300, 400, 500, 600 freaking pounds. Take accountability for a change and work on yourself- or find out the hard way someday, it’s not my problem because I’m skinny and not fat..
FACT!!! Once you see yourself hitting that 200-300 pound threshold it’s time to take a look at what’s going on before you’re in the 4,5,600 range saying you can’t change and it’s so hard.
Not a choice if you have a genetic condition like I do. I'm "obese" because I have a condition called lipedema which is a condition that involves fat, but it's not like your typical fat that can disappear with exercise. And also it is almost only found in women and involves the hips, thighs, calves, buttocks and sometimes arms. It's actually a painful condition because the fat is hard as opposed to your normal type of body fat. Many women with lipedema can be a normal body type from the waist up and can be 2-3 sizes larger on the bottom half - even more - but you're considered obese because of the stupid BMI.
I was over 420lb, under 6 months later an I've lost over 120lb and still going strong. Long way to go still but it shows it is possible when you put your mind to it. These body positivity people are in denial, the perpetual victims. Nothing can be their own fault. It is difficult, and the hardest part is acknowledging there is a problem and then doing something about it. But once you do start with the right diet and the right excerise the weight flies off before you know it.
That is amazing!! How wonderful it is to realize that accepting responsibility means that if you created the situation, given the right circumstances, you can change it.
Preach bro! If you got some workout tips/recommendations please slide them this way. My weight has gone stagnant on diet alone, and I’ve been wanting to hit the gym but have been putting it off due to a lack of knowing what workouts would be good to do
I agree it is (generally) a choice too! I’ve been overweight and I’ve been average. Having a healthy relationship with food is a serious challenge for a lot of people in the same way that drugs, alcohol, mental health, or emotional regulation is difficult for another person. Food abuse just happens to be one that is very apparent on the outside. I wish the world had more empathy for people struggling with weight loss, because we all have our demons. The important thing is to never give up on yourself.
I'm slender but Ive always had compassion for overweight people My mom's family is from the South and a lot of her folks are overweight. She's actually big herself. It's definitely a genetic issue and I don't understand why people call it "laziness". I've eaten so much junk food but being tall and slim you would never know
I have been overweight most of my adult life. I blamed it on hypothyroidism and pcos for YEARS before finally being honest with myself. I overeat, and I am highly addicted to sugar. On my birthday last year, I decided to go carnivore and have lost 60+ pounds so far. That's without exercise. Seriously, I don't exercise. When the one woman said "we should be able to enjoy the foods skinny people do", I felt that. Because for many years, that was my mantra. I'm an adult and should be able to eat whatever I want! Right?! But just as alcoholics can't "indulge" in an occasional beer, sugar addicts can not indulge in an occasional cookie. This month as been a prime example as I have fallen off the carnivore wagon and spiraled into old habits of binging carbs and sweets. All that to say, this is a choice. Making healthy choices and restricting certain foods is hard, but being obese and unhealthy is harder. You just have to choose your hard.
I have a hormone disorder, it still doesn't cause more than a 30 lb gain. And Cushings is very rare. You don't realize how much hormones run things till you have a problem, and it makes you really sick. You know something is wrong. Congrats on your loss and journey ! Be careful of family and friends, they are the worst at sabotaging you, not strangers, lol. I lost 60 lbs once and it was eye opening how people react and sabotage you. If you fall off, it isn't over, just dust yourself off and get right back on it. Just a piece of advice, don't ever give yourself permission to break the rules because then you end up doing it all the time. Best of luck to you.
Don’t stress too much about falling off the wagon; everyone does from time to time! The speed in which you get back to winning ways is what’s important. You’re human and are allowed to make mistakes.
I wish the joy of self-mastery tasted as sweet as overindulgence in bad things. Alas, it does not. I do a lot of substituting with keto. The fake sugars do not have the same sweetness but it is enough.
As an overweight person with a hormonal imbalance that makes losing weight nearly impossible even when doing boot camp style workouts every day. I'd say it's still a choice. Because I can choose to stop and continue to gain, or I can keep going and maintain my healthier weight and body. It's a LOT of work. But I know how it is to give up and how bad I feel physically and emotionally when I look at myself. The hormonal issue isn't an excuse to be unhealthy.
It's not, you just need to cut out all fat from your diet and eat solely whole food. There's decades of research on this and how poorly oils and fats affect ALL hormonal health but no one wants to listen.
@justfacts9649 I actually do know this. But it's also a matter of cost. Whole foods cost almost double what regular groceries cost. So it's also definitely finding a balance in what you eat and what you can afford. The system is definitely not built for success in that area. But it doesn't stop me from trying. There's a lot of farms in my area as well so I've been able to get quite a bit from local farms. But the hormone issue I have doesn't go away. It can be managed, which is what I'm trying to do. But if I ever stopped trying, it would have more symptoms than what I already do.
@justfacts9649 Actual RAW food isn’t checked for disease most of the time. Not the same as organic. You sound like you’re just trying to make people feel bad.
The fact that people refuse to be accountable when it comes to their weight is so frustrating. Not because of any 1 individual but because our society is letting laziness win and these people to get away with skirting accountability
The real issue for me is that you have to pay insurance in europe for people like that. I feel like there should be a premium on your ensurance fee depending on your weight if it isn't affected by a disease.
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I’ve been in the overweight spectrum for most of my life. It’s caused me eating disorders, anxiety and self esteem issues that have completely changed my life for the worst. Even through that suffering, I can still acknowledge that even a few pounds make a huge difference in how you feel, how your body responds, how you function in day to day life. I know that even if I eat healthier and exercise more than most of the people I know, just the fact that I’m carrying more weight than I should makes me unhealthier. That’s just the truth even if it’s hard to hear.
As someone else who used to be 300lbs and is now 170 and fit, it's a mind set and getting into it and realizing how much better you legitimately feel.. once u break that barrier u start questioning everything you eat, "how does this benefit me" and when it's snack foods you say none and specifically avoid it.. when. It's normal eating times you obviously eat .. but while growing up, I lived exactly like that one girl mentioned, a Blue belt in judo AND 300lbs while 2 legitimate doctors as my senseis .. and I lost my weight many years later walking to a friend's house every day during a summer when I had lost my license for a year I'm positive what was happening and why I didn't lose weight was because my system was actually missing something that I wasn't getting .. im betting it's something that's missing in many people and no matter what u do u don't lose weight but that one thing, is the key
There was a British show that followed the extremely obese and extremely underweight and they had to live and eat each other’s diet for a week it was the best series that showed the two side and their dangers
@@paulcarpenter7844 it did a man who was overweight became more active and was starting to live a more productive life and a woman who was very underweight was able to get better and manage to get pregnant after a few months. It didn’t force them to crash, it gave them tools to change in the long term it was a very good show.
i was fat for over 10 years. i felt good while being fat, was regularly at the doctor to check me. but since I was not skinny but had less weight before, I missed a lot of things. I decided then to start and lose a bit of weight and seeing even the smallest changes that some things are easier in life now makes me more motivated to lose more and hold my weight now. I thought I felt good being fat, but its just what I told myself. now I really know how it feels to be happy with myself.
This is a really good point. You forget how good it feels, looks aside, even harder if you were overweight as a kid. So, you convince yourself that you aren’t restricted in any way.
Many blessings to you in your journey. I was always skinny as a kid and really active… I put on a bit of weight (not much extra… 10 pounds) as a young adult and immediately felt uncomfortable… and at that point decided overweight was not for me. I am by no means underweight and I do fluctuate but there is an upper limit.
I love that who you surround yourself with is the very first point brought up. This is so important to any health choice, too. Do your friends support your core beliefs and values? Do they drink too much? Do they notice when your health seems to have taken a turn for the worse and care enough to bring it up? On a physical level, it could be about the types of things you do with your friends. Mentally and spiritually, do they encourage you? If you go to church, do your friends go too or motivate you to get up on a morning you may not quite feel up for it? Does your friend drag you to Taco Bell at 3 am to talk about her problems or do you socialize over coffee in the morning or on a walk? Such a good point. Makes me think how grateful I am to have grown up on sports teams. I don’t have a friend I really work out with anymore since we’re all pretty busy with family and jobs but now it’s kind of drilled into me I’ve just gotta go out and do something a few days a week. Thankfully, my husband and daughter are always up for a hike in the woods.
I'm 22 years old and for all of my adult life I was obese. At my highest I was 305lbs at 6 foot. Now that ive made the CHOICE to control what I eat (no matter how hard it was some days) I've lost 135lbs. However many people forget the second stage to this, as Brett said, is to put on muscle and not be scared to gain weight again. Stay strong kings and queens, good luck on your journies 💪🏼
As an RN... this idea that there are "set weights" at which your body wants to be at....it's true. BUT it can be reprogrammed. It's the reason why so many people can successfully lose weight quickly, and then immediately gain it back plus more, the moment they stop dieting. You reprogram your body by employing slow, sustainable weight loss, and by switching to a permanent change in diet rather than a temporary diet. The "set weight" is programmed into your hypothalamus and it will adjust if you can lose weight and keep it off over a long period of time. if you shed quickly and then get off the diet, your hypothalamus will push you to eat more and eat high fat/high sugar to pack the weight back on because it thinks you are starving.
My best friend growing up was very large. Weighed about 300lbs at 14 years old. Both of her parents were very large (and both very tall) people. Mom was a smoker, Dad was a diabetic. Blame goes to the parents first, her second when she came of age. There is such a thing as the “age of responsibility.” It’s all quite sad really.
There have been scientific studies about people who were obese children and it’s much harder for them to lose weight and keep it off. Unless you’ve been in their shoes you can’t talk unfortunately
I come from a background of bigger people, I don't let this put my outlook on how I look or my choices. Not too long ago, I had stomach problems, I started eating consistent meals and just going on a 15min jog, not allowing myself to "snack". This included changing my WHOLE life style entirely, It made me go into a consistent routine. In my opinion its about life-style, making choices.
People forget how much of an impact snacking has. Once in a while it's fine but doing it something like three times a day stacks up quickly (depending on the snacks themselves of course)
exactly, even healthy snacking isn't great, mainly because you should be getting enough nutarians, to no longer feel hungry after eating every meal. It's okay every once in awhile like you said, but for sure a bad habit I used to have. @@EvilExcalibur
Routine is so important for everyone. I struggle with my weight on the other end of the spectrum (underweight) and if I don't stick to a strict routine of meals at the proper times, everything goes bad. A routine of good eating and exercise can do so much to improve your health
omg so true though! I always have had a hard time of keeping a consistent weight, which isn't great. My constant routine has helped me to improve so much, as a person and my health. @@nocturne2029
I swear our algorithms are the same…lol I love those middle ground videos and I loved this one! Good commentary🙏🏻 The main thing I always think about in these kinds of discussions is how big food and big Pharma have ruined and manipulated so many peoples body’s and relationships with nutrition…wild 😔
if you think eating Mc donalds is dinner. youre going to have health problems im 5'11' and 180 pounds . i don't work out but my girlfriend calls me a gorilla . we eat fish , chicken and pork . cook our own foods . im irish so everything is covered in potatoes as well . . the garbage and soft drinks and potato chips. its killing you .
I love that u can tell this is something you're passionate about Brett . the way you're talking is very serious and calm regarding it. Love this video .
One thing I do want to mention. I am overweight. I have been morbidly obese and have lost over 50lbs. BUT I do want to mention doctors using size and weight as an excuse to not do a full checkup. Anything to do with my body, I've just heard "lose weight." I've had bloodwork done for many other reasons (pregnancy, life insurance, ect.) and I'm healthy as a horse, besides the extra weight and the excess androgens and testosterone (I have pcos). But cholesterol, blood pressure, hemoglobin (nowhere near pre-diabetic even though I have insulin resistance due to the pcos), all blood work and tests come back healthy. Not to mention I catch the least illnesses and when I do catch something, it is typically less severe of anyone in my family (I have 2 children in school so we know how many illnesses they pick up). So please don't tell me that any and every health concern I have is weight related. Do a real workup like you would if I were 140lbs. Makes me so mad. Yes, obesity is a problem. But my weight is not the reason for every health issue. I am still losing weight btw. Having pcos does make it more difficult, I'm aiming for around 1000 calories a day (I know, dangerous, ooohhh) but around 400 of those calories are from protien so I am finding more success on the days I hit my protien goals. I will explain why it is hard. When you have pcos, often times (if you have insuling resistance with it) your cells don't absorb insulin properly, and so your pancreas makes more. This puts extra stress on the pancreas, which can lead to type 2 diabetes. All the extra insulin is stored as fat. As I said I've lost over 50lbs, so I'm doing okay. I have about 50 more to go to be a healthy weight. I'm trying to be healthier. Is being overweight a choice? No. I didn't wake up and say "I want to gain weight." I've struggled with weight my whole life. Yes, I've made poor choices that lead to weight gain, but I also have a hormonal issue I've been fighting against too which causes weight gain more rapidly than someone else who would have the same diet as I did pre weightloss.
I came from a mom who was chubby not super fat but definitely knew she wasn’t healthy, when my sister went to college and got fat I thought my fate was sealed, but when I went to college and moved out I made it a point to go outside and run every morning and eat the right foods, I’m the only one in my family at a healthy weight and realized weight is not predisposed but are personal choices you make everyday. You’re health is just as important if not MORE important than your education cause everyone ages and the bigger you are the more medical complications you’re at risk for
Yup, good on you for doing better. Unfortunately many people inherit bad habits and are raised by parents who can't or don't teach them how to eat healthy so they think they must be predestined to be overweight when the reality is they just don't know any better.It's not ideal, but the good news is people can be taught new things.
It is also important to point out that food is addictive especially sugars. Addicts are really good at justifying their actions through the lens of their addiction. This is coming from someone who struggled with weight my entire life.
My mom has multiple medical conditions, which is why she has always been overweight. She has been trying to lose this weight since I can think, but it has never really done something long-term. She still keeps trying and that's why I am so proud of her because she doesn not give up or say "It's okay to be fat nowadays." No, she keeps trying and trying and that is positive!
That your mom never gives up shows a real strength and determination. Even if she never gets the results she wants, that effort means something. Real role model. I wish my MIL would face the music and admit that she only wants to smoke copium, consume product, and blame her parents.
Same with my mother's ex boyfriend's daughters. Both of them. His oldest daughter died as a teenager from health issues relating to her weight and his younger daughter who wasn't even a teen yet, had the same condition and was fat (though not obese), despite eating very little and hardly ever eating anything with sugar in it. We were the same age, ate the same things (except I ate more candy than her) and got almost the same amount of exercise, yet I stayed skinny and she stayed fat. DNA most definitely plays a role and it seems these fat activists latched onto the tiny minority of people, whose size IS in fact largely caused by genetics and then used it to say "OH, then that's probably why I'M fat, so that means I can keep eating 20 McDonald's burgers and 7 bowls of sugar a day, cause I'd probably be fat even if I didn't. What a shaaaaame :)". Also before anyone asks, I have no idea what the medical condition was. I was a kid, so I wasn't informed of the details and even if I had been, I definitely wouldn't remember them now at age 34, lol.
I was raised with not the best eating habits and was bullied alot, especially during physical education class (i hope that‘s the correct english term?), which all resulted in overeating snacks and fast food and hating sports; eating gave me a sense of control and autonomy while triggering my reward center and sports made me feel miserable bc i had the mind set everything i did was wrong and laughable. It was when i got married (very young, at 19) that my husband helped me change my views. He was raised balanced and healthy. It took me YEARS to change my point of view and take responsibility for my very own choices, for my body, for my life. It still is a piece of work. But now i cook healthy meals, i have an eye on what i eat, i went to therapy for several years and now I‘m 8 months pregnant and started doing sports regularly (3x a week for about 45-60min each) 4 months ago. You can change your habits at any given time. You need patience, the right point of view (a self loving one) and probably some kind of support from the outside (partner, therapy, friends, whatever). But you can stand up to yourself and change your own life TODAY. When the state you‘re in is a result of your past choices, your future choices will define if it stays that way.
my dad is an good example, he has a very rare nerve illness and he got very fat because of the medication he had to take, but when he finally was able to lower the doses and then finally stop taking them and started to work again, his choices led him to lose all that weight and I’m so proud of him. Now He is feeling much better ,fitter ,healthier and is making the right choices to keep that weight.
Just curiosity, is it RSD/CRPS he that dad has? Just wondering because my boyfriend's story sounds like your dad and he has that disability listed above God bless you. In case no one has told you today Jesus loves you very much and made you special ❤
I had en ED, and it were definitely thousands of small choices that led to habits that led to the position of absolutely NO choice. I had to undergo severe life changes/mental changes to overcome it and every day I thank God for giving me my sanity back, for letting me choose right again.
I'm not sure how erectile dysfunction relates to this topic but if you're equating p*rn addiction to food addiction, I can see your point. I'm glad you've overcome that nasty affliction.
I’m glad you mentioned that stress and the nutrition of your food is a factor cause the one girl who just says “-calories in calories out” isn’t really true… it seems like it makes sense until you realize that the food you eat has to actually have nourishment or else the low calories don’t do anything but add to the problem. I have struggled a lot with my weight because I thought if I worked out hard enough and ate less food that it would help but it actually spiked my cortisol so much that I gained more weight. I agree being obese is somewhat a choice but I have also learned first hand that it’s more complicated than just eating more or less.
Exactly this. I learned this through breast feeding 3 children. They tell you breast feeding helps lose pregnancy weight... but what they don't tell you is that it doesn't work unless you are getting the base amount of calories your body needs to function, plus the base calories it needs to support making milk for your child. If you are trying to hit a calorie deficit, but it cuts into your functional calories, your body will desperately hold onto it's fat stores to make sure you have enough to simply function. It works the same even when you aren't feeding a baby, but your body will definitely hold onto more for the benefit of a child then it will for itself. A lot of women that struggle to lose weight while cutting calories are cutting so much that their bodies come to believe food is scarce. They will hold onto weight and be super lethargic at the same time, stressed and absent minded. They have to change their relationship with food and make sure they are getting nutrient dense meals that will curb their hunger for more than they need. Like the one commenter said, making a food diary can be life changing. Most people don't realize just how many extra calories come in the form of cooking oils, sauces, and dressings. They think, 'olive oil is healthy' and don't stop to realize that it may be healthier than, say, peanut oil, but it still has like 120 calories in 2 table spoons. It becomes super easy to overuse when making meals.
I have a more unique experience with this. Being large/skinny is, in 99% of the time a CHOICE. It DOES take extra effort if you have medical issues but it IS still a choice. Even in the case of a parent (what I would think is borderline child abuse) letting the child gain excessive weight. As you grow and learn it IS your choice to continue that life style. For me I have the opposite issue. I am naturally skinny. I have a fast metabolism. 3 years ago I was finally diagnosed with idiopathic hypersomnia. Basically excessive daytime sleepiness. When I started taking medication to help me stay awake, I lost so much weight I was almost down to 100 lbs as a 5'6" female. I didn't know why until I realized I wasn't hungry and was actually forcing myself to eat. Then realizing it was a rare side effect of the medication I took. However, I worked my BUTT off to get myself up to a healthy weight and thank God have successfully kept myself at that weight. But it's still a journey everyday. When I was down to basically 100lbs, I had joint issues and I was lethargic. When I would open up during my journey of getting back to a healthy weight, most would almost be jealous that I took a medication that made my appetite less. People, specifically in the fat acceptance movement (cause let's be honest that's what it is now) would tell me I'm lucky. That is shouldn't complain and that I'm "privilaged" because I'm skinny and pretty. I'm sorry but when I eat half a sandwich and feel like I'm so stuffed because my appetite is low but I know my stomach is still empty but I can't bring myself to eat that isn't privilage. I work so hard everyday to eat enough calories to stay at the weight I am. But people only assume and I'm tired of it. I choose to not wither away, to put in the hard work to stay healthy. Don't call it privileged. You don't know what going on behind the curtain.
There's a gym in the UK with a guy (I forget his name) that literally caters for disabled people... there are people with serious conditions, like cerebral palsy for example, working out there... so having a medical condition is no excuse.
This was actually a very productive conversation. To the point where I was like okay we've reached a lot of good points here, now let's go after the FDA and the food administration, the medicine issues, and the amount of soy and supplemental ingredients that they put in food now to make it cheaper, is a real problem. People aren't getting the nutrients they need. Don't get me wrong I do feel that being morbidly obese for the majority of everyone like Dominic said is a choice. However with the other things brought up, I am willing to be in the middle ground, if we work together to question certain medical habits/the FDA. I don't feel like certain people should be on medications that they are automatically put on because doctors don't want to deal with it.
The food industry "invests" a lot of money to make/offer unhealthy food at a cheaper price than what is cost us to buy healthier (or unprocessed) options. So, even though I wish that would happen and had this conversation brought up at the Congress or else, I don't see it changing anytime soon, unfortunately.
@@bobbybenes at least more people are waking up. of course it will be an uphill battle to make good decisions in our culture but companies will respond to consumers. screw congress, when was the last time they did anything to help us? all anyone can do is make good choices for themself
@@carlholland3819 about the government - was saying especially because of the "fat free" and "sugar free" stuff (labeling food as they are - unhealthy), but I'm positive there are "interests" involved. I'm on the same page that is a personal decision and should count on ourselves, but, for example, when the fast food chains offer food options way cheaper/faster than what a good meal cost/takes, they won't go away anytime soon.
There are some changes we could and should make a nation to have a healthier populace. One thing I think worth considering is farming and producing more food locally. Shelf life is super important when food is being shipped all over the country. It also makes food more expensive to ship and contributes to climate change in a negative way. Obviously everything can't be produced locally, but that would help a lot. Another thing is education. In other countries they teach children about nutrition and teach them how to cook in school. It's part of their curriculum from the time they are children. If children know how to cook, shop and understand nutrition they can not only make better choices, but they won't be so dependent on fast food and highly process foods which are some of the biggest contributors to weight gain.
I'm actually getting my degree in Exercise Physiology, and one of the elements of my degree is how to work with people who have health conditions and how we can help them exercise, eat better, and become healthier through evidence-based principles and through biological responses to exercises. I love how you approached this subject in this video❤️
As a disabled person, we need this. I need someone to help me with gentle exercises. If you aren't throwing weights around, there isn't a lot of info. Right now I just use exercises for seniors.
To all those people feeling sorry for yourselves. I'm here to say you don't need to feel better about yourselves. You need to feel awful. When you feel awful you want to change and change you will. I went from being a 5ft9 375lb teen who got traded. Now at 27 I'm 6ft1 and a lean and muscular 225. & instead of getting teased, people at work call me the john wick of carts. I'm asking all those who are overweight to go watch john wick and watch how john moves. & remember 3 things focus commitment & sheer fucking will. Find a plan that works for You and fix your life. You all deserve the best & as someone who is still on his journey it shouldn't end. Keep going keep improving. Best of luck to all those with the will to try
I can relate. Was 360 pounds at my biggest and was 6 foot 2 inches tall. My all time goal was to join the marine corps. I am now at 190 pounds and feel the best I have ever felt. I genuinely don’t know how I operated at my size. Focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will did indeed do that.
As an epileptic, I tried different diets, medication, general lifestyle changes like exercise, sleep etc. keto has made the biggest change in my epilepsy and even in my health in general, I’ve lost body fat and gained muscle. I also didn’t have the best diet… RUclipsr Isaac butterfield woke me up to this lofestyle
As a woman with a chronic pain issue, I can tell you it’s crazy hard to work out. It hurts, you have no energy, and the natural inclination is to lay down and rest. The problem is that sometimes that inclination is right. Sometimes it’s wrong. In the end, when I find the balance that lets me keep excess weight off, it’s going to help I’m the long run. Less weight means less pressure on my already strained body. It’s a struggle, but life isn’t fair. Some of have to fight harder. We’re not alone in that though.
@@cincydooley it can definitely be. You also have folks like me who were born with issues like fibromyalgia, arthritis, etc etc… or developed it very young. It’s important (and difficult, as I mentioned) to keep excess weight off because of the additional strain it puts on you. Regardless of if you had it before or if it’s caused by the weight, less strain (and by that I mean too much or even going in the direct opposite direction and being underweight) on the body is always going to be better.
i recommend going on walks then jogs to build up your stamina. also dont start with a full gym routine you have to build muscle at a steady pace because if you dont youll just be sore because your muscles havent been trained for heavy lifting and such. yk dont bite more then u can chew type thing
As someone who’s naturally pretty skinny and toned I feel like genetics has to have a significant role to play. That being said, it’s still a choice for the vast majority of people (exceptions being medical reasons / medications etc). Even with it being a choice though, the workload needed to get and remain thin differs vastly from one person to the next. I wouldn’t judge anyone until I knew their habits and how they generally ate. I was a boarder in high school and spent almost 24 hours with the girls I loved with and went to school with. We didn’t have the opportunity or much money/ allowance to go and get extra food except on weekends and it was a rare occasion if we did. I lived with girls of widely varying sizes who did after school sports and are the same food as each other. Of course there are some that ate second and third servings who were large but there were also many girls who didn’t and we’re still very large.
It’s not fair the bodies we are born with, my sister is naturally skinny, eats more than me and is around 90 pounds while I have to eat under 500 calories a day to stay skinny
Hey Brett enjoyed the video and your reactions for the most part. One little quibble, one of the main things that motivated me to start exercising and losing weight was the data that started coming out fairly early on about obese people having a higher fatality rate with covid so it wasn't hidden. I do want to add though that I avoided talking to randos about covid and focused on looking for facts rather than waste time arguing with people so maybe that was the differences in our experience. A lot of people are really ignorant about what is necessary to be a healthy weight. When people talk about being poor and the connection to weight there is some truth there, but there's a certain amount of ignorance. My family was working class growing up and we were always thin, except for my mom who gained weight with having kids, though she eventually lost a lot of it. But my mother budgeted our groceries to make sure we always ate balanced, nutritionally sound meals and we were always in the healthy weight range. I say people are ignorant because the one young lady talking about working out to lose weight, you don't have to work out to lose weight all you have to do is eat less. If you eat fewer calories than you use you will lose weight. Working out is great and you should do it but eating less is honestly more important than working out. I do think the way our society is set up at present makes it harder than it should be for our populace to be healthy, but rather than just giving into that if you really want to call yourself an activist you should be pushing to changing those things rather than just rolling over.
I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, which makes losing weight really difficult. I also am a stress eater, which also makes losing weight really difficult. That all said, I still have the choice to make healthy decisions. It’s a long and hard road…but I’ll get there eventually.
I agree with absolutely everything you said. However, when I was very overweight and had a hard time losing weight after having a second child, the thing that really kicked off my weight loss was actually a touch of body positivity. I had been rather disgusted with how I looked. And that kinda made me feel more depressed. I’d try dieting and exercising for a while and it didn’t see any results. I was in my 20’s, plenty able-bodied. No health conditions that prevented me from losing weight. Then I think I heard a podcast or something that talked about body positivity and learning to love yourself exactly as you are. And my thought was… they’re right! I love my body. I have carried two babies. It is a wonderful companion to my brain. I need to treat my body in a loving way instead of a hateful way. I stood in front of my mirror one day and just offered my body unconditional positive regard. This does NOT mean I asked anyone to tell me I was beautiful. Nor did I wear revealing clothing and expect people to think it was appealing to look at. No, instead, I decided that I was going to take better care of my body as part of my self care, as part of loving myself better. And that mindset switch has been life changing for me. I lost 60 lbs and got down to an ideal maintainable weight for my body. I never lost my curves and became a Barbie doll. THAT is genetic. I did have to learn to be okay with curves even at a healthy BMI. That’s another form of body positivity I learned to accept. Right now… it’s the holidays, and I’m on the upper side of a normal BMI because I am enjoying myself. But I’m not worried. When the feasting is over, I’m won’t have any issue going back to my usual healthy habits and routines. And I’m not really disgusted with myself for carrying that 10 extra pounds. I am confident I can take care of that easily. I will say that my initial weight loss journey did not happen overnight. I ended up having to keep to my healthier habits for about a month or maybe more before I began to see results. In fact, I think I gained 5 lbs at the beginning and that was hard. But I tried to just remind myself that I was making good choices, even if the scale wasn’t reflecting it yet. And then eventually, it did start to drop. So for anyone who is struggling, I hope this offers some hope and encouragement. To me body positivity is loving yourself enough to make healthy choices. And it can start with some acceptance of where you are right now. You can look in the mirror and tell yourself “I accept you as you are, but let’s get healthy together.”
The last part, I wished I had heard that a long time ago. I've always been on the heavier side. I struggled to lose weight no matter what I did. And because of the number on the scale, I was always shamed and told by providers that I was just destined for all this stuff to happen because of my weight. I also got diagnosed with a thyroid and a hormone condition. So I was like "well there's nothing I can do about it lol" and didn't care. But when my husband and I moved out to South Dakota I wanted to change that. So I started exercising and seeing a trainer and a dietician. The goal was to just love myself enough to make the right choices. Then I got pregnant. When I switched to a midwife at the hospital I would possibly give birth at(I was aiming for a home birth so I was still looking around for a home birth midwife) she was shaming me and said I was destined to have GD and complications because of my weight and said I could not gain more than x amount of weight. I didn't get GD despite her making me take the test twice then insisting I take it a third time. That made me restrict myself. The restriction actually caused my body to go into survival mode to sustain me and my baby. My home birth midwife was so mad because these hospital providers were doing more harm to me and because of them, I was having BP issues at 38 weeks. She helped me turn it around with diet changes (increase protein and sodium levels aka brewer diet). She also had me eat more in smaller portions so that I was able to sustain baby and I while not overwhelming myself because I was shamed into basically starving myself and my baby during pregnancy. I ended up having to have a c section and the OB was ANGRY when I told her that the triage midwife said I had complications because I am morbidly obesed. She said that wasn't the reason. My son was in a wonky position so even if I progressed well at home, he would never have made it out vaginally. Now 9 months postpartum, I've lost over 20lbs so far on diet and exercise (I was full on low carb but that I guess put my body into shock and it messed with my emotions as I have PPA. I still am low carb I just adjust the amount of carbs I eat based on if I exercised or not). This is the most weight I've lost in years. My motivation right now is my son. He's such an active little dude and I want to be able to keep up with him. And also my goal is to prepare my body for the next baby and have a successful VBAC.
All of life is about choices. Literally every single thing in your life boils down to choices that you make. You may not even realize that you are making choices that will seriously effect your life, but if you are completely honest with yourself, you can trace everything going on in your life back to specific choices that you made. There is no chance, circumstance or coincidence. It's all choices. So, choose wisely.
I suppose I could have chosen to take growth hormone in my early teens. I could have and still can have major surgery to make myself taller. Yeah 100% everything is a choice.
@@rodiusmaximus , stop it. You know that's not what I was talking about. Of course, I wasn't talking about things that you can't change. Everything in life is a choice, of course with the exception of things that you don't have a choice over. Duh. My God, man. Does everything have to be spelled out?? Does no one have common sense anymore?? WTF???!!!
@@Big_Tony_Speaks You literally stated 'literally every single thing in your life...' You literally already spelled it out. Common sense would literally mean interpreting your words at face value. Sorry for not being able to read your mind.
@@rodiusmaximus what fuckin choice can you make to change something you can't control??? Common sense isn't your strong suit is it? But, then I keep forgetting that common sense isn't so common these days. I truly feel sorry for you, if this is how you go through life.
@@Big_Tony_Speaks shit, dude! At least I know what words mean. You're the one who said everything is a choice, not me. Making sense isn't your strong suit, is it?
I'm obese. It's almost always a choice. An unhealthy one. It is hard once you're already fat to avoid those temptations. I've lost weight before. I will do it again, and this time I'm gonna make that permanent. Keep yourself around good people and be personally responsible and you'll be fine.
My wife is obese but that is not by her choice. She is a 3 time cancer survivor. As a consquence of various glands being removed to abate her cancers, she requires various meds, no fewer than 15 different rxs and upwards of 23, sides effects of a few of them are weight gain. On top of that, she had her stomach reduced and she eats about a 1/3 of her previous amounts prior to her reduction. Her weight stays above normal no matter what she does. She has the motivation to be healthy and to work out as best as her body will allow, but no matter to hom much she tries, she cant lose the weight.
The point about the average weight is interesting because what we’re really looking for is optimal weight not average weight, and the reality is that the optimum is closer to the skinny side of a skinny - fat scale.
I laughed so hard at the comment about alcoholism. I have a great uncle who is a philology professor at a university and he is the most formal, upright, responsible and boring person you can find... until he gets drunk. At all family gatherings everyone conspires to make him drink alcohol, because then he will literally become the life of the party. 😂
Dude is right in the middle of his character arc and I just love to see it. Unironically beautiful. As for the subject, it's really irritating when people use their circumstances to justify their choices but it's even more so that they've taken to gaslighting the entirety of society at large just to make themselves feel good. It's worse still that it's worked so well.
I love that guy who is so honest with himself, and he made a very important point that just because something is more difficult for you doesn't make it impossible. I'm an introvert and it's difficult for me to make friends. That doesn't give me an excuse to not have friends, and I can't ignore the studies that show that loneliness is terrible for my health or claim that all of the studies are biased. We were all dealt a bad genetic hand in some aspect of life. It's better to be self aware and work to make the most of what we have.
I truly don’t think anyone is going around and saying, “it’s impossible because it’s hard.” I think we just would like everyone to stop assuming everyone can be a healthy weight because it’s “not that hard.”
I was in an accident at 17 that completely ruined everything in my life. I wasn’t the healthiest eater before but I was in good shape. As I was healing I was stress eating (I know it’s terrible) but I didn’t know what was happening with my knee I was being told so many different things once was told I might lose my foot because of how much swelling was happening. After 2 years of searching for answers I finally got “some” and I say that VERY lightly. I had surgery on my knee. (19 years old) after that I got back on track started getting more active trying to lose the weight I gained in that stressful time especially not being able to move around at all. Fast forward to 22 I was in the best shape I’d been in since being an adult I was so happy and proud I still had a long way to go but I was getting muscle and was getting so much healthier and slimmer. Then 23 happened. My knee fell apart again. I was out for 4 months waiting for a surgery they weren’t sure if it was going to help or not (august to December) finally had it done had a couple set backs but I was doing good until PT wasn’t doing ANYTHING for me. The finale to my saga happily ends at 24. I found a surgery that helped WONDERS with my leg I AM finally able to walk normally no limp or anything holding me back. the absolute best part about this is, I know what I’m capable of I now KNOW I can lose weight even when my leg wasn’t doing good at all. I’m still healing from my surgery (it’s a huge surgery to help my pain in my leg) and I now know when I do get back out into the “normality” of the world it’ll be 10x better because I now have answers and I’m not going to keep making the choices that were putting on weight when I was healing (granted I couldn’t even get up to get food for myself) but now I can walk and since I’ve had this surgery and felt up to walking I’ve been walking like you wouldn’t believe! I beat myself up a lot because I have gained a lot of weight over the years but I do know this is because I haven’t been able to move at all and I’ve made some bad choices and I am going to completely change that when I get back to life.
I was in high school during the thigh gap era. But I was on the side of feeling self-conscious BECAUSE I had one. I have a naturally high metabolism that runs in the family. I don't easily gain or lose wight and the emphasis in my family was to still focus on health because especially while younger, my body may not appear unhealthy on the outside but could be a mess internally depending in choices I made. As the body positivity movement took off I felt worse about myself because my body struggles didn't align with the "positivity" narrative.
I’ve seen my mum, my aunts, my grandma. I know I’m genetically predisposed to be on the bigger side of the scale when I get older and probably after kids, so I’m choosing to work on my weight now!!! It’s totally a CHOICE!! Yes focusing on body image in a negative manner can be unhealthy but you have to channel that negativity and focus on understanding and learning what your body needs to be healthy.
With my second who is now 4, it's took about a year/year and a half to shed the weight. I'm now back to being a fit chick 💪🏻. You can do it too 😊@@jennynordin3001
I told my doctor that I wanted some help getting in shape just some tips on nutrition, blah blah blah. I end up having to go back in three months because I was passing out and feeling drunk. she said I was having blood pressure problem so put me on blood pressure medicine which made my life insurance skyrocket where I had to cancel it. I am a 33 year old woman. I got mad about the whole thing. Educated myself stopped taking the Vyvanse and Adderall and lo and behold I didn’t have any more blood pressure issues, it severely ruined my trust with my doctor, and it all stemmed from me, wanting to be educated on nutrition. Well, thank God for the Internet lol.
I was practically bed ridden for almost 3months due to major surgery. I gained quite a bit of weight and have struggled to get back down to a healthy weight. But Im making the right choices and slowly but surely Im getting back into healthy habits and losing weight every week.
I love the neckbeard guy. He is completely correct. Losing weight is hard, for lots of reasons. It takes time and a lot of willpower, and its ok if you haven't gotten there. As long as you know it's bad for you, you're an adult and you can make your own choices about what is important to you.
I'm a teen right now, and I started to make better food choices. My parents are both fit, but that is mostly because they have a good metabolism and go to the gym. I used to be really chubby, but I'm down a lot of weight now and happier. It really is a choice.
I'm a 40 year old woman dealing with ever decreasing hormones and perimenopause. It sucks. It's so easy to gain weight and so hard to lose and keep it off. HOWEVER, it is still my choice what I eat, how much I work out, etc. What I was doing in my 20-30's isn't going to work now. So it is my responsibility to adjust.
I developed an eating disorder called ARFID after a traumatic experience with food from my gastroparesis (paralysis of the stomach). From that point, I became really scared around eating food, not because of the way it would make me look, but because of the way it would make me feel. Without noticing, I started to disappear. I was becoming severely underweight. I lost all energy. I regularly felt faint. I developed depression and anxiety that made every step a battle. I am in recovery now (still not at a healthy BMI), but knowing how close I was to organs shutting down is scary. If we're defining being skinny as underweight and being fat as overweight, than I wouldn't rather be skinny than fat. But I also wouldn't rather be fat than skinny. If Jubilee is defining being skinny as being at a healthy weight, then I think the answer is obvious from the start.
It all very much depends on what the definition is. Words matter and what they mean matters. Compared to a morbidly obese person, anyone of a normal or healthy weight could be called skinny. If the culture is fat, the healthy person is anorexic. And Western culture IS becoming obese. You should be able to move around and engage in moderate physical activity without fainting or gasping for air. Our bodies have parameters to meet in order to function with maximum output.
This is a very good comment, underweight is generally more dangerous then being overweight. But overweight is more dangerous then healthy weight. Image wise I think we all woukd prefer to be at least in the healthy weight range.
A lot of us are fat/thin mainly as a product of our lifestyles without dedicating much effort towards it. The hurdles a fat teen has to overcome after being raised with terrible eating/exercise habits are way higher than the hurdles a healthy teen has to overcome. A lot of in-shape people would be obese if they grew up in a different environment, and they should keep that in mind and be compassionate when criticising others
I have a metabolism deficiency due to my thyroid. I have to work a lot harder than most people to maintain my weight. My parents bought themselves expensive clothes and items, and with the little money left they bought cheaper processed foods, and I was obese under their "care." I'm so blessed to have a partner who appreciates and understands how important home meals with fresh food is to me. We prioritize putting good and healthy food on the table with our money, and that makes me so happy. And you best believe that I will be supervizing my kids when they're at my parents' house.
Being fat is absolutely a choice. In the 1950s the obesity rate was 10% and today it's 41%. If fatness was more determined by genes and intinsic factors then we wouldn't see such a drastic increase. Lifestyle, habits, education and the biggest factor, choice, determine most obesity.
I’m an RN, I see so many people that are overweight that barely eat and underweight people that barely eat. I think that we need to focus more on teaching healthy food choices instead of weight because that is going to vary from person to person no matter what we do.
I have seen multiple times of proof that some overweight people aren't overeating, there's usually something going on medically that is preventing weight loss. For me, I have hashimoto's and take medication for it and I got diagnosed with cushing's later. I started losing weight after getting both of those conditions controlled.
I gained weight after being put on antipsychotic and mood stabilising meds, to the point that i was morbidly obese. Four and a half months of dieting and doing at least 11,000 steps daily has helped me to lose 3st so far. I still have a long way to go, but i want to get back to about 8 and a half stone or 119lbs
Every piece of food or beverage you put into your mouth is a choice. Edit: Aint it funny that the same people that are saying it isnt a choice are also saying they would rather be fat than skinny.
Try living with a medical disorder like Hashimoto's or PCOS. You'll soon learn it's not always a choice. Stop being ignorant and arrogant about other people's lives when you know nothing about what they are dealing with.
@kp4911 let's male this very simple for you because you aren't listening. There are factors in your life that make weight loss more difficult, and yes you will have to work harder, or change different things. But it isn't impossible. There are legless marathon runners. Your point is moot.
@kp4911 My family suffers from hypothyroidism. It still remains a choice. It will always remain a choice. No amount of excuse you can throw will ever make it not a choice. While some diseases do facilitate you in gaining weight, it is your choice whether you do anything to mitigate it or just choose not to and gain weight. While it will always remain your choice, it is not your choice on how others view you, which includes your lack of discipline and self-respect.
@@lextheap1638 I have Hashimoto's and last year got my tumor removed due to Cushing's which also causes weight gain. I lost over 50 lbs in a few months just from working on those two conditions. I now have a normal metabolism, before I could have walked 20 miles a day and dieted and that weight wasn't coming off.
I've been living with insulin-resistant PCOS since I was 16 and it has led me to have so many issues with my body image and my relationship with food. It's also so hard to talk about it because it feels like I'm always being judged for the way I look.
Omg yes! I have PCOS, a tumor pushing on my pituitary gland, back issues due to a MVA, and a tumor in my uterus... I rarely eat and try working out but I'm usually in tears due to the pain.. People shouldn't talk
Sorry you have to go through that. There are diets that help with PCOS eg the carnivore diet or keto but it just depends on your choice to follow them or not.
I'm a 6' man. When I was a kid, I could eat anything I wanted and I guess I was active enough to burn it off. Up into my early to mid-20s I was a little under weight. After I left college and started working, I became much less active, and my weight jumped up a few times. I had a friend who got me into softball and hockey, so I wasn't completely sedentary. But, by my early 30s, I was over 205 lbs, and I didn't like how I felt. (BMI says I should in the low 180s.) At that point in my life, all it took was a tiny bit of discipline. I joined a second hockey team. And, I started paying attention to my portion size. As a kid, we're told to clean our plates, When I got older, often, those last four or five bites were very uncomfortable, because I was already full. I realized, I live in America. I don't intend to intentionally waste food, but generally speaking, I don't need worry about "wasting" that last bit of food on my plate. American restaurants serve ridiculous portions. Often, I can take 1/3 of it home for a snack later. So, in my 30s, eating a little less and exercising a little more was all it took to get down to 185 over the course of six months. And I held that for maybe eight years. My weight started to climb again after I passed 40. That teeny bit of discipline wasn't enough anymore. In Feb 2012, I started using a calorie counting app. I'm currently at 4329 days in a row. I basically treat my calorie intake the same as a financial budget. I have so much to spend. If I go over for a day or two, I need to go under for a little while to compensate. They way I put it, the app has saved me from a lot of chips and chocolate. I'm aware of the calories I'm eating every time I grab something from the cupboard. I've met many people who, on their bad days, say, "I'm just not going to count my calories, today." I have been diligent about tracking pretty much everything, every day. A few times a year, like going to Fogo da Chao as I am this Friday, I'll go 1500 calories over. I don't try to make all that up in one day. I'll spread it out over a week. I'm over 60, now, and it really is more difficult to get the weight to come off. But, at least I've plateaued. I still play hockey, so I'm somewhat active. As the guy in the video said, it's still a choice and a discipline thing. I recognize that I do need to put in a little more effort to shave off a few pounds.
I believe that it is a choice but its hard to make. I am a 12 year old girl who is 140 lbs and 4'8 I recently decided that I would go on a fast for 15 days or a diet just because all of my friends are skinny. I hate how I look but its so hard to lose weight even though I do softball, basketball, volleyball, and get daily exercise by going on a walk or running a mile. [Taking suggestions to lose weight]
Im a teen im 200 pounds..but im 6 feet so im not morbidly obese but i am over weight im trying my absolute best to lose weight ive lost 20 pounds this last month...im not doing it healthy im starving myself but im tired of being like this
I’ll preface this with, **BASED ON MY EXPERIENCE** YES! Doctors 100% lie about medications that you, “NEED,” as well as the dosage you, “NEED,” NO question. Especially when it comes to medications related specifically to *Mental Health*, which is terrifying. I’m sure someone out there who reads this can relate.
My whole life people telling me I eat to little, when in reality they eat too much. Is almost like they want to get me to be fat too 😅I never had the courage to tell them the truth “Is not that I eat too little, is that you eat too much and you are fat”, I’m not able to say that, mostly for people I love, but if I truly want their well being I should look for a nice way to tell them. Wish me luck. Edit: isn’t interesting though how I’m the skinny one never criticized the amount their ate, and they the fat ones criticized me? I guess healthy body health mind is a real thing.
I've been both. After I had my daughter I weighed 184 lbs. I was so unhappy with myself and the way I looked. So I changed that and got down to 120 lbs. I'm 5 foot 4 and I'm much happier and have been able to maintain my weight for years. I eat less food but balanced meals. I also take a quick cold shower after my warm showers which I think has helped me a lot. I drink nothing but water now and I do have sweet tea from time to time.
I’m currently in nursing school, and my professors are still teaching us that being overweight is horrible for you health. Doctors at my hospital still advocate for healthy weights in people, so I don’t think that our healthcare system is sweeping obesity under the rug like you’d think.
Facts I also remember in pre-med we learned the standard stuff about obesity and i recently went to the doctors a few months ago, was like barely over my bmi but they still handed me a packet about how adults should get around 3 hours of exercise a week (or preferably more ofc). So it’s not doctors, I think it’s more so society and our many places with access to larger portions and more sugary foods & drinks paired with people’s choice to eat a lot of said things are what causes obesity. And of course exercising less or not at all. Like I traveled to Japan and 99% of locals are normal weights there because of their culture not to overindulge, type of diets (ie a lot of rice & fish) and ofc it’s more walkable in many areas. It’s our choices, mostly, and the narrative of body positivity as it is now is more like body toxicity, lying to yourself that it’s okay to be overweight just because a lot of people around you are. It’s pretty interesting stuff
Growing up, my family always held big reunions where there was a lot of food, the majority of my family is obese, and I'm no different. I have genetic dispositions for diabetes in my family, as I grew into a teen, I was diagnosed with PCOS, which my dr told me that was an issue for me not being able to lose weight, despite me being active often. I figured out that the hypothyroidism that I was diagnosed with when I found out I had PCOS, was actually Hashimoto's, and I didn't find that out until 15 years later. I've always struggled with my weight, and there are a lot of times I don't have the energy to do any exercise, and I thankfully am getting help from dieticians and weight management, I just don't like exercise, so I don't do it, and that's my choice. I need to change it to be healthy for myself and my future children.
Hi! Disabled woman here, thank you for putting people who REALLY can't help their weight in a different category. I've always been my BMI up until a couple years ago and I'm now 185 lbs, sometimes even 195 lbs. While I don't consider myself fat, I'm naturally more muscular and thick built so the weight I've put on definitely doesn't make me look skinny like I was. I do what I can to help myself though, making sure my disability isn't getting triggered, I eat healthier, and I recently started going back to the gym... some things help people not end up 600 lbs. I don't understand the excuse people heavier than me make unless they have similar issues that I do because if I'm able to maintain mine with a genetic predisposition for diabetes and obesity, have a physical disability, and have an issue where my body doesn't know how to control the cortisol it puts out... why can't they lose it? It really does just feel like laziness.
I've been big my whole life. I'm 5'6 and in April of 2022 I weighed 455lbs. My mother asked me on her death bed for me to lose weight for her. I promised her I would and a year and a half later I weigh 295lbs. I still have a lot of weight to loose but I feel absolutely amazing. I was diabetic, could barely walk, had a hard time getting dressed, could barely sleep more than 5 hours without my back hurting as I sleep on my stomach and was on a inhaler because I couldn't breath. Since I lost 155lbs I am no longer diabetic, don't need an inhaler anymore, I sleep a full 8 hours and no longer have back or knee pain. I can honestly say I would rather be skinny than fat. I used to think I didn't eat that much until I went on a strick no carb diet and realized how much I was actually eating. I basically only eat eggs, meat and cheese now. I chose to eat unhealthy and I chose to not exercise so yes being fat is a choice and I choose to be skinny and healthy.
0:01- I just want to be healthy that's it. I dream of being a parent someday and I doubt anyone can get pregnant if they're 400 lbs.(That's not my situation, just using this as an example to make my point.) I don't want high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, stroke, or any of those health problems. I want to stay alive as long as God allows me to be. Then when God says it's time to go home, but it won't be because of lack taking care of health. With God willing, my death will be due to old age and I'll be in God’s kingdom where youth is restored, tears are no more, sighing ceases because earth life is done and heavenly life begins. Hallelujah!
I usually agree with Brett 100% of the time, but I am naturally skinny and can eat whatever I want, however when I was on those lupus meds that girl was talking about I gain 20lbs in 6 months. It came off afterwards, but nothing I did (eat healthy food, exercise, etc.) stopped it from happening. It was discouraging, so I understand where she is coming from.
I can absolutely believe that your metabolism changed with the medication, but I do not believe that you became a perpetual motion machine that could maintain extra weight without also feeding yourself energy.
Things can make it more difficult or easier to lose or gain weight, but there is. Nothing that just magically adds fat to your body without consuming the necessary calories to create the fat stores. Magic does not exist even in lupus pills.
There are two ways to look at your situation. You weighed more than usual because of the meds and it was a WHOLE 20 POUNDS! or You weighed more than usual and it was ONLY 20 pounds! Just as with pregnancies, some women CHOOSE to eat more than necessary (just like holidays where people eat without even considering if they are full) and gain way more weight than called for as a result, leading to a much longer period of recovery to their body before, or blame the children for the choices they make after. Point is that you ONLY gained 20 pounds, when the average is much higher, BECAUSE of your choices.
Most weight control comes through the diet, especially more protein, less sugar, control the calories, whole natural foods. There's also a difference between big and obese, where being big tends to be a set point, being obese means you're unhealthy. And yes, BMI is highly flawed, which is why my doc doesn't say anything about my horrible BMI.
I have an unpopular opinion that if starving your child is abuse, over feeding your child and making them obese is also abuse. It’s your responsibility to teach your kids
As a young child, being fat is your parent’s choice. The early habits that made a child fat will lead to a very hard chain to break as an adult. But once you learn how to not be fat, it’s now a choice.
Exactly
Facts
I managed to break the chain im glad
Actually there is a problem if your parents are fat/obese then genetically their children will more likely be obese so they are already at a disadvantage. The same is with children born to drug addicts.
Maybe up to being a young adult. An actual grown adult can't keep making excuses for themselves though. Their parents won't always be around. You could have had a miserable childhood but at some point you have to stand up and say, "I know my childhood sucked, but my behavior isn't helping anything."
Remember that "body positivity" was originally meant for people who were different looking (the disabled, to start), NOT for fat women who want to be lazy.
Exactly... i remember it as loving your body if you gad stretch marks as a mother, or being banana shaped rather than hourglass shaped, it was never an excuse to let yourself go and disregard your health...
yeah, I am almost conspiracy-pilled to believe that the message has been hijacked by the companies that benefit from the obese.
Don’t be sexist: not for lazy men either 😝
Body positivity has never applied to men.
Men have continued to be shamed for their body.
@@niallk9336 Yup exactly -- when was the last time you saw a plus-sized male model?
If life were a videogame where you could choose your character's appearance, everyone would choose the characters that look healthy, attractive and in shape.
Exactly
Great way to put it! Very true
@@jodiperez8870 I don't know your age but for everybody works the same, there is a reason why people who have been skinny their whole life when they start getting older they begin to put on weight.
Metabolism slows down with age, if you eat the same as you where eating when you were younger doesn't matter if with that exact diet you lost 120lbs it's still too much, saying things like "I would eat a healthy meal with low calories i would gain weight" is just bs and since you lost 120lbs you damn well know that already, "low calories" really means nothing unless you know what your basal metabolism is.
@@jodiperez8870tl;dr, it's a choice and you're consuming too many calories. it's a numbers game. 🤷🏻♀️
@@jodiperez8870 tl;dr, you're eating too many calories, it's a choice you're making.
I was an obese teen (a little over 200lbs), and ive lost around 35lbs within the last few months. Being fat or obese was 100% a choice i made until i decided it was time for me to do something about it. I havent been this light OR happy in many years 🥰
congratulations! i am so proud of you! keep it up 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
hey good on you! kinda funny saying 200lbs is fat for me personally, but it all depends on height i guess haha. ive always felt i was on the skinny side at 200lbs(6'4")
Congrats! You’re worth feeling healthy and being able to go and do as you pls! No one has to be Victoria secret thin whatsoever and most aren’t, it’s about actually being healthy and eating right, being active and living a long life. Anyways good job
@@mitchellcolvin3844 height is the primary determining factor for what your weight should be
A tall persons healthy weight is going to be above a short persons healthy weight
That's common sense
Congratulations! That is no easy feat and you should feel good and proud! I was overweight for a time and I lost it in a not so healthy way (pregnancy and HG, I threw up for 9 months straight). I knew I was eating poorly, and I knew it was my fault. If I got to far I'd pull back and eat healthy until I went down a bit but it was my choice.
The first guy nailed it. The majority of it is based on habits, mental state and the will power to make changes - and unfortunately it is not as simple snapping the your fingers. You have to subconsciously want it and make the changes. It can be hard. I was at my lowest weight when I was eating more, but I was eating healthier (although harder to prep meals vs 'bad' food) and exercising. Then I had job changes, less personal time, family/kids, got older and I started getting tired....which gave me excuses to not exercise, prep food, etc... I'm almost back to the state where I'm going to make changes that push me to get back into exercise and realising that I don't eat until I'm full (meaning I've over eaten), but eat a small meal and let it settle and then realising I don't actually to eat more for that meal period.
Willpower is a limited resource, which is why good habits, filling foods, and healthy ways to deal with stress are so important. One important point is that some foods trigger binging, and some foods change your hormones, which may affect your behavior, leading to a spiral of bad diet.
Try walking to and/or from work, if possible.
Absolutely love that Brett pointed out that some of the problem is from bad information people are given about how to lose weight and what's healthy. As a personal trainer I see this so frequently; people doing so much and trying so hard but acting on bad information so not getting the results they're looking for.
I agree. Also, it seems to me like there are a lot of fake health food products now… leading people to think that they are eating a healthy snack when really it’s almost as bad as eating chips.
it's also people just doing too much at the start. Seen plenty people talk about dieting by trying to starve themselves and give up after a week. Better to cut down on 500 calories than normal and slowly work your way down
Yea losing weight is all about consistency.
Consistency with _some_ exercise. Consistency with diet, especially a slight calorie deficit.
The Japanese have a concept of never eating to feeling a full stomach - always eat to 70-80% full.
losing weight is not complicated. its kindergarten math. people have no willpower
On the food side of things sometimes it’s switching brands. Some thing as simple as reading the back of the ice cream containers. Strawberry or coffee ice cream is going to be better than him Ben & (Hates America) Jerry’s. And low carb or keto yogurt or egg custard with stevia would be even better than ice cream. I found cashew milk mixed with macadamia nut milk a drop of liquid Stevia and black cocoa powder makes a hot cocoa that basically taste like a melted oriole.
I've been obese and super skinny. Both get talked about and aren't healthy, however I don't think *most* people would choose to be fat if they could choose to be thin overnight
yes same here. the extra weight actually does affect you physically, i find myself walking slower and having less energy 😅 although it may be due to other factors too
@@nadiaterezon8281 yes! I'll take the skinny cause if you need to gain I think everyone agrees that eating to gain is easier than exercising to lose 🤣
I honestly don't want to be skinny, because I'm older. If I could be a comfortable size 38, I'd be happy....waist size 88🎉 not impossible, but it's a head move to just do it and to make it a lifestyle choice! 👌🏼🇿🇦🎄
@@tanjasmit7535I’m glad that you added the flag because I was a bit concerned about why you would be happy to be a size 38. A size 38 in the US would be enormously huge-definitely not sold even in the plus size stores. It would be like a size 62 in South Africa whereas the size 38 in South Africa is a US 14.
@@wdwgirl9206 lol🤣🤣 no, then a 14 for sure, our clothing actually is marked as such, 14/38. I used to be a 12/36 when I was young 🫢🤩
I rode the bus with a kid that was at least 250. Everyone was mean to him at first, but he told us that he had a problem with his thyroid that was causing his weight gain. He got surgery done a year later and my God that boy dropped weight so fast. He's currently like 190 and still dropping pounds!! I'm so happy for him, it makes me happy to see people understand that it's not just what you eat.
Same happened to me, used to weigh 120 lbs at 5'5" then I got hashimoto's and cushing's disease in my late 20's and didn't find out about it until I hit 31. In that time I gained 150lbs. Now I am 34 and am on levothyroxine and got surgery for the cushing's and my weight is dropping pretty fast after getting those two things taken care of. If someone is not losing weight doing calorie restriction it is worth looking into internal problems.
@@CuteAnimeGirlI thyroid problems same as you, used to weight 120 now 165 😢 I am going to the gym and stopped eating things that hashimoto people cant eat even on thyroid meds
As someone who was consistently obese, it is definitely a choice. I used to be 50 pounds overweight, but I recently lost 55 pounds because it was damaging my health. Now, I have learned how to eat healthier and I hope these people will eventually make the right choice.
No, it isn't. Not when there are factors involved like degenerative joint disease that makes movement very painful and even injurious.
Maybe for you it was a choice but not for everyone and definitely not a choice for me.
@@s.c.7362and like many people that bring up this kind of argument you chose to talk about an extreme condition and like brett said this a different category. We're talking about the normalization of an unhealthy lifestyle and the normalization of obesity as healthy that's what the modern body positivity movement is trying to tell us. Even when someone has a condition that causes them to be overweight they would be objectively wrong to say that their situation is healthy and could definetely make healthy choices over unhealthy ones. I don't understand people like you cannot realize that conditions are a different situation and not what we are focusing on
@@s.c.7362 That's not statistically relevant and swimming and eating an appropriate diet are always an option.
@@s.c.7362 obviously for some people its harder to loose weight because of health conditions like my mum can barely walk because of her back problems but she has recently started trying to loose weight and everyone has noticed a change in her sttitude she is much happier now then she was before. im not gonna sit here n say its a choice to become fat but it is definitely a choice to stay fat
I was a very skinny child. And once I started middle school I got bullied for my light weight. Kids told me I had an eating disorder and I believed it and started eating more by the end of 8th grade I was a 5 foot 130 pound girl. I joined sports and worked off the weight by 9th grade. I am finally fit and healthy again ❤
That’s strange. They kinda bullied you into having some disordered eating tendencies it sounds like. I had an eating disorder growing up. Nobody really knew and just said I must have a fast metabolism but the number of adults commenting on weight without ever actually thinking there might be something to be concerned about is a little insane. That could be said either way. If a kid is way too skinny or way too fat, don’t just assume it’s “their metabolism.”
I had a similar experience: being bullied for being very thin and wanting to gorge myself to gain weight. Thankfully i made better friends and the disordered eating didn't go on for too long. I'm sorry you had that experience, and congrats on turning it around!
Ummm lol
My sister was also a skinny kid, she even had family members insulting her and shaming my mom for not "feeding her"
@GalaxyWave-fh1cbI was bullied for being fat at a normal weight. And this was 80s fat, not 2020s fat. By normal weight girls, kids are just assholes.
As someone who went from 330 lbs to 160lbs I much prefer being skinny, when I was large I had a hard time breathing and doing literally everything
I never fat shame, but being skinny feels sooo much healthier
I'm gonna edit this, I used the term skinny due to the wording in her caption "would you rather be fat or skinny?"
"being skinny feels sooo much healthier"
That's because it is.
I hate to break it to you but 160lb is not skinny. Congratulations on the weight loss though.
Geez, that’s awesome. Very impressive.
@@loganblackwood2922that’s not true at all. It’s like your forgot all about the height of the person. 😂
@@loganblackwood2922 Actually you are wrong with this comment! I know numerous women that are 160 and very lean because they are taller or athletic!
Depends, how skinny and how fat. Both taken to The extreme is dangerous
Yes! I can't understand when people tell emaciated skeletons they look so good just because they're skinny. They *don't* look good
My father died of Lupus. I watched him deal with it as a child, and I have to say... Docs said he had four years, he lived for fourteen because he exercised, ate right, laughed... He chose to be happy and healthy.
As someone who is morbidly obese, I think he hit the nail on the head when he was talking about the difficulty of choices. This doesn't just apply to weight. It is in our nature to choose what we perceive to be the easiest path.
This applies to life in general, and lifestyle. Living off of credit cards and spending more than you make is typically a choice too. Yes, most people choose to be poor (there are exceptions but most people don't fit the exception).
I say this as someone who has conquered several of my self imposed limitations, even if I haven't conquered them all (like my size).
Exactly, how difficult the choice is, doesn’t make it any less a choice.
So willpower > than, I get it too.
This question is the somehow unironic version of "would you rather be the top scientist in your field or get mad cow disease?" for this generation.
But this generation actual has a segment of society arguing for their mad cow 😂
100% a choice. No one naturally becomes 300, 400, 500, 600 freaking pounds. Take accountability for a change and work on yourself- or find out the hard way someday, it’s not my problem because I’m skinny and not fat..
FACT!!! Once you see yourself hitting that 200-300 pound threshold it’s time to take a look at what’s going on before you’re in the 4,5,600 range saying you can’t change and it’s so hard.
Not a choice if you have a genetic condition like I do. I'm "obese" because I have a condition called lipedema which is a condition that involves fat, but it's not like your typical fat that can disappear with exercise. And also it is almost only found in women and involves the hips, thighs, calves, buttocks and sometimes arms. It's actually a painful condition because the fat is hard as opposed to your normal type of body fat. Many women with lipedema can be a normal body type from the waist up and can be 2-3 sizes larger on the bottom half - even more - but you're considered obese because of the stupid BMI.
It could be your problem if you're flying Southwest Airlines.
@@victorialopez9717 I don't think that condition makes you hundreds of pounds heavier than your natural weight though...
Leave it to a fat ass to have a billion excuses why there fat though 😂
I was over 420lb, under 6 months later an I've lost over 120lb and still going strong. Long way to go still but it shows it is possible when you put your mind to it. These body positivity people are in denial, the perpetual victims. Nothing can be their own fault.
It is difficult, and the hardest part is acknowledging there is a problem and then doing something about it. But once you do start with the right diet and the right excerise the weight flies off before you know it.
Congrats!!!
you should be very proud of yourself. keep it up im routing for you
That is amazing!! How wonderful it is to realize that accepting responsibility means that if you created the situation, given the right circumstances, you can change it.
Preach bro! If you got some workout tips/recommendations please slide them this way. My weight has gone stagnant on diet alone, and I’ve been wanting to hit the gym but have been putting it off due to a lack of knowing what workouts would be good to do
🙏🙏
Mark my words, the body positivity movement is being funded by big sugar companies like PepsiCo and Coca cola
I agree it is (generally) a choice too! I’ve been overweight and I’ve been average. Having a healthy relationship with food is a serious challenge for a lot of people in the same way that drugs, alcohol, mental health, or emotional regulation is difficult for another person. Food abuse just happens to be one that is very apparent on the outside. I wish the world had more empathy for people struggling with weight loss, because we all have our demons. The important thing is to never give up on yourself.
I'm slender but Ive always had compassion for overweight people My mom's family is from the South and a lot of her folks are overweight. She's actually big herself. It's definitely a genetic issue and I don't understand why people call it "laziness". I've eaten so much junk food but being tall and slim you would never know
I have been overweight most of my adult life. I blamed it on hypothyroidism and pcos for YEARS before finally being honest with myself. I overeat, and I am highly addicted to sugar. On my birthday last year, I decided to go carnivore and have lost 60+ pounds so far. That's without exercise. Seriously, I don't exercise.
When the one woman said "we should be able to enjoy the foods skinny people do", I felt that. Because for many years, that was my mantra. I'm an adult and should be able to eat whatever I want! Right?! But just as alcoholics can't "indulge" in an occasional beer, sugar addicts can not indulge in an occasional cookie. This month as been a prime example as I have fallen off the carnivore wagon and spiraled into old habits of binging carbs and sweets.
All that to say, this is a choice. Making healthy choices and restricting certain foods is hard, but being obese and unhealthy is harder. You just have to choose your hard.
I have a hormone disorder, it still doesn't cause more than a 30 lb gain. And Cushings is very rare. You don't realize how much hormones run things till you have a problem, and it makes you really sick. You know something is wrong.
Congrats on your loss and journey ! Be careful of family and friends, they are the worst at sabotaging you, not strangers, lol. I lost 60 lbs once and it was eye opening how people react and sabotage you.
If you fall off, it isn't over, just dust yourself off and get right back on it.
Just a piece of advice, don't ever give yourself permission to break the rules because then you end up doing it all the time. Best of luck to you.
Don’t stress too much about falling off the wagon; everyone does from time to time! The speed in which you get back to winning ways is what’s important. You’re human and are allowed to make mistakes.
I wish the joy of self-mastery tasted as sweet as overindulgence in bad things. Alas, it does not.
I do a lot of substituting with keto. The fake sugars do not have the same sweetness but it is enough.
i love the statement "choose your hard". EVERYTHING involved discomfort. Choose what is objectively best regardless of the pain.
Well, the good part is that you learned a tool to help yourself - now you can pick it back up when you're ready.
As an overweight person with a hormonal imbalance that makes losing weight nearly impossible even when doing boot camp style workouts every day. I'd say it's still a choice. Because I can choose to stop and continue to gain, or I can keep going and maintain my healthier weight and body. It's a LOT of work. But I know how it is to give up and how bad I feel physically and emotionally when I look at myself. The hormonal issue isn't an excuse to be unhealthy.
Respect ❤
It's not, you just need to cut out all fat from your diet and eat solely whole food. There's decades of research on this and how poorly oils and fats affect ALL hormonal health but no one wants to listen.
@justfacts9649 I actually do know this. But it's also a matter of cost. Whole foods cost almost double what regular groceries cost. So it's also definitely finding a balance in what you eat and what you can afford. The system is definitely not built for success in that area. But it doesn't stop me from trying. There's a lot of farms in my area as well so I've been able to get quite a bit from local farms. But the hormone issue I have doesn't go away. It can be managed, which is what I'm trying to do. But if I ever stopped trying, it would have more symptoms than what I already do.
@gillibean.1075 once again, that is a lie you bought into. Raw food is so much cheaper than processed packaged food.
@justfacts9649
Actual RAW food isn’t checked for disease most of the time. Not the same as organic. You sound like you’re just trying to make people feel bad.
The fact that people refuse to be accountable when it comes to their weight is so frustrating. Not because of any 1 individual but because our society is letting laziness win and these people to get away with skirting accountability
The real issue for me is that you have to pay insurance in europe for people like that. I feel like there should be a premium on your ensurance fee depending on your weight if it isn't affected by a disease.
I’ve been in the overweight spectrum for most of my life. It’s caused me eating disorders, anxiety and self esteem issues that have completely changed my life for the worst. Even through that suffering, I can still acknowledge that even a few pounds make a huge difference in how you feel, how your body responds, how you function in day to day life. I know that even if I eat healthier and exercise more than most of the people I know, just the fact that I’m carrying more weight than I should makes me unhealthier. That’s just the truth even if it’s hard to hear.
As someone else who used to be 300lbs and is now 170 and fit, it's a mind set and getting into it and realizing how much better you legitimately feel.. once u break that barrier u start questioning everything you eat, "how does this benefit me" and when it's snack foods you say none and specifically avoid it.. when. It's normal eating times you obviously eat .. but while growing up, I lived exactly like that one girl mentioned, a Blue belt in judo AND 300lbs while 2 legitimate doctors as my senseis .. and I lost my weight many years later walking to a friend's house every day during a summer when I had lost my license for a year
I'm positive what was happening and why I didn't lose weight was because my system was actually missing something that I wasn't getting .. im betting it's something that's missing in many people and no matter what u do u don't lose weight but that one thing, is the key
There was a British show that followed the extremely obese and extremely underweight and they had to live and eat each other’s diet for a week it was the best series that showed the two side and their dangers
Supersize vs superskinny, i used to watch it
Yesss!! Remember that...
Don't wanna be on either side😢
I love that show. It points out the dangers of both and helps both sides with diet plans.
Did it work
@@paulcarpenter7844 it did a man who was overweight became more active and was starting to live a more productive life and a woman who was very underweight was able to get better and manage to get pregnant after a few months. It didn’t force them to crash, it gave them tools to change in the long term it was a very good show.
i was fat for over 10 years. i felt good while being fat, was regularly at the doctor to check me. but since I was not skinny but had less weight before, I missed a lot of things. I decided then to start and lose a bit of weight and seeing even the smallest changes that some things are easier in life now makes me more motivated to lose more and hold my weight now. I thought I felt good being fat, but its just what I told myself. now I really know how it feels to be happy with myself.
This is a really good point. You forget how good it feels, looks aside, even harder if you were overweight as a kid. So, you convince yourself that you aren’t restricted in any way.
It sucks to get on your 30s and go “wow…I’m skinny now. If only I was like this in my 20s too. Wow I could have ruled the world “ lol
Many blessings to you in your journey. I was always skinny as a kid and really active… I put on a bit of weight (not much extra… 10 pounds) as a young adult and immediately felt uncomfortable… and at that point decided overweight was not for me. I am by no means underweight and I do fluctuate but there is an upper limit.
I love that who you surround yourself with is the very first point brought up. This is so important to any health choice, too. Do your friends support your core beliefs and values? Do they drink too much? Do they notice when your health seems to have taken a turn for the worse and care enough to bring it up? On a physical level, it could be about the types of things you do with your friends. Mentally and spiritually, do they encourage you? If you go to church, do your friends go too or motivate you to get up on a morning you may not quite feel up for it? Does your friend drag you to Taco Bell at 3 am to talk about her problems or do you socialize over coffee in the morning or on a walk? Such a good point. Makes me think how grateful I am to have grown up on sports teams. I don’t have a friend I really work out with anymore since we’re all pretty busy with family and jobs but now it’s kind of drilled into me I’ve just gotta go out and do something a few days a week. Thankfully, my husband and daughter are always up for a hike in the woods.
I'm 22 years old and for all of my adult life I was obese. At my highest I was 305lbs at 6 foot. Now that ive made the CHOICE to control what I eat (no matter how hard it was some days) I've lost 135lbs. However many people forget the second stage to this, as Brett said, is to put on muscle and not be scared to gain weight again. Stay strong kings and queens, good luck on your journies 💪🏼
As an RN... this idea that there are "set weights" at which your body wants to be at....it's true. BUT it can be reprogrammed. It's the reason why so many people can successfully lose weight quickly, and then immediately gain it back plus more, the moment they stop dieting. You reprogram your body by employing slow, sustainable weight loss, and by switching to a permanent change in diet rather than a temporary diet. The "set weight" is programmed into your hypothalamus and it will adjust if you can lose weight and keep it off over a long period of time. if you shed quickly and then get off the diet, your hypothalamus will push you to eat more and eat high fat/high sugar to pack the weight back on because it thinks you are starving.
My best friend growing up was very large. Weighed about 300lbs at 14 years old. Both of her parents were very large (and both very tall) people. Mom was a smoker, Dad was a diabetic. Blame goes to the parents first, her second when she came of age. There is such a thing as the “age of responsibility.” It’s all quite sad really.
Wrong!
when she is responsible to drive she can be responsible to drive herself to the gym and not to Mcdonalds
There have been scientific studies about people who were obese children and it’s much harder for them to lose weight and keep it off. Unless you’ve been in their shoes you can’t talk unfortunately
I come from a background of bigger people, I don't let this put my outlook on how I look or my choices. Not too long ago, I had stomach problems, I started eating consistent meals and just going on a 15min jog, not allowing myself to "snack". This included changing my WHOLE life style entirely, It made me go into a consistent routine. In my opinion its about life-style, making choices.
People forget how much of an impact snacking has. Once in a while it's fine but doing it something like three times a day stacks up quickly (depending on the snacks themselves of course)
exactly, even healthy snacking isn't great, mainly because you should be getting enough nutarians, to no longer feel hungry after eating every meal. It's okay every once in awhile like you said, but for sure a bad habit I used to have. @@EvilExcalibur
Routine is so important for everyone. I struggle with my weight on the other end of the spectrum (underweight) and if I don't stick to a strict routine of meals at the proper times, everything goes bad. A routine of good eating and exercise can do so much to improve your health
omg so true though! I always have had a hard time of keeping a consistent weight, which isn't great. My constant routine has helped me to improve so much, as a person and my health. @@nocturne2029
How fast are your miles when "jogging"? That's important. Anything under 5 MPH doesn't count, neither does 15 minutes; make it 30 minutes.
I swear our algorithms are the same…lol I love those middle ground videos and I loved this one! Good commentary🙏🏻 The main thing I always think about in these kinds of discussions is how big food and big Pharma have ruined and manipulated so many peoples body’s and relationships with nutrition…wild 😔
🐶
if you think eating Mc donalds is dinner. youre going to have health problems im 5'11' and 180 pounds . i don't work out but my girlfriend calls me a gorilla . we eat fish , chicken and pork . cook our own foods . im irish so everything is covered in potatoes as well . . the garbage and soft drinks and potato chips. its killing you .
I love that u can tell this is something you're passionate about Brett . the way you're talking is very serious and calm regarding it. Love this video .
One thing I do want to mention. I am overweight. I have been morbidly obese and have lost over 50lbs. BUT I do want to mention doctors using size and weight as an excuse to not do a full checkup. Anything to do with my body, I've just heard "lose weight." I've had bloodwork done for many other reasons (pregnancy, life insurance, ect.) and I'm healthy as a horse, besides the extra weight and the excess androgens and testosterone (I have pcos). But cholesterol, blood pressure, hemoglobin (nowhere near pre-diabetic even though I have insulin resistance due to the pcos), all blood work and tests come back healthy. Not to mention I catch the least illnesses and when I do catch something, it is typically less severe of anyone in my family (I have 2 children in school so we know how many illnesses they pick up). So please don't tell me that any and every health concern I have is weight related. Do a real workup like you would if I were 140lbs. Makes me so mad. Yes, obesity is a problem. But my weight is not the reason for every health issue.
I am still losing weight btw. Having pcos does make it more difficult, I'm aiming for around 1000 calories a day (I know, dangerous, ooohhh) but around 400 of those calories are from protien so I am finding more success on the days I hit my protien goals. I will explain why it is hard. When you have pcos, often times (if you have insuling resistance with it) your cells don't absorb insulin properly, and so your pancreas makes more. This puts extra stress on the pancreas, which can lead to type 2 diabetes. All the extra insulin is stored as fat. As I said I've lost over 50lbs, so I'm doing okay. I have about 50 more to go to be a healthy weight. I'm trying to be healthier. Is being overweight a choice? No. I didn't wake up and say "I want to gain weight." I've struggled with weight my whole life. Yes, I've made poor choices that lead to weight gain, but I also have a hormonal issue I've been fighting against too which causes weight gain more rapidly than someone else who would have the same diet as I did pre weightloss.
I came from a mom who was chubby not super fat but definitely knew she wasn’t healthy, when my sister went to college and got fat I thought my fate was sealed, but when I went to college and moved out I made it a point to go outside and run every morning and eat the right foods, I’m the only one in my family at a healthy weight and realized weight is not predisposed but are personal choices you make everyday. You’re health is just as important if not MORE important than your education cause everyone ages and the bigger you are the more medical complications you’re at risk for
Yup, good on you for doing better.
Unfortunately many people inherit bad habits and are raised by parents who can't or don't teach them how to eat healthy so they think they must be predestined to be overweight when the reality is they just don't know any better.It's not ideal, but the good news is people can be taught new things.
It is also important to point out that food is addictive especially sugars. Addicts are really good at justifying their actions through the lens of their addiction. This is coming from someone who struggled with weight my entire life.
My mom has multiple medical conditions, which is why she has always been overweight. She has been trying to lose this weight since I can think, but it has never really done something long-term. She still keeps trying and that's why I am so proud of her because she doesn not give up or say "It's okay to be fat nowadays." No, she keeps trying and trying and that is positive!
That your mom never gives up shows a real strength and determination. Even if she never gets the results she wants, that effort means something. Real role model.
I wish my MIL would face the music and admit that she only wants to smoke copium, consume product, and blame her parents.
Same with my mother's ex boyfriend's daughters. Both of them. His oldest daughter died as a teenager from health issues relating to her weight and his younger daughter who wasn't even a teen yet, had the same condition and was fat (though not obese), despite eating very little and hardly ever eating anything with sugar in it. We were the same age, ate the same things (except I ate more candy than her) and got almost the same amount of exercise, yet I stayed skinny and she stayed fat. DNA most definitely plays a role and it seems these fat activists latched onto the tiny minority of people, whose size IS in fact largely caused by genetics and then used it to say "OH, then that's probably why I'M fat, so that means I can keep eating 20 McDonald's burgers and 7 bowls of sugar a day, cause I'd probably be fat even if I didn't. What a shaaaaame :)".
Also before anyone asks, I have no idea what the medical condition was. I was a kid, so I wasn't informed of the details and even if I had been, I definitely wouldn't remember them now at age 34, lol.
From what I'm seeing this is the calmest jubilee I've seen in a while lol
I was raised with not the best eating habits and was bullied alot, especially during physical education class (i hope that‘s the correct english term?), which all resulted in overeating snacks and fast food and hating sports; eating gave me a sense of control and autonomy while triggering my reward center and sports made me feel miserable bc i had the mind set everything i did was wrong and laughable. It was when i got married (very young, at 19) that my husband helped me change my views. He was raised balanced and healthy. It took me YEARS to change my point of view and take responsibility for my very own choices, for my body, for my life. It still is a piece of work. But now i cook healthy meals, i have an eye on what i eat, i went to therapy for several years and now I‘m 8 months pregnant and started doing sports regularly (3x a week for about 45-60min each) 4 months ago.
You can change your habits at any given time. You need patience, the right point of view (a self loving one) and probably some kind of support from the outside (partner, therapy, friends, whatever). But you can stand up to yourself and change your own life TODAY. When the state you‘re in is a result of your past choices, your future choices will define if it stays that way.
Ahh, good for you!! It's nice to know you worked on yourself
my dad is an good example, he has a very rare nerve illness and he got very fat because of the medication he had to take, but when he finally was able to lower the doses and then finally stop taking them and started to work again, his choices led him to lose all that weight and I’m so proud of him. Now He is feeling much better ,fitter ,healthier and is making the right choices to keep that weight.
if he has a very rare illness maybe hes not a good example
Just curiosity, is it RSD/CRPS he that dad has? Just wondering because my boyfriend's story sounds like your dad and he has that disability listed above
God bless you. In case no one has told you today Jesus loves you very much and made you special ❤
Id say try RSO have u heard of it?
I had en ED, and it were definitely thousands of small choices that led to habits that led to the position of absolutely NO choice. I had to undergo severe life changes/mental changes to overcome it and every day I thank God for giving me my sanity back, for letting me choose right again.
I'm not sure how erectile dysfunction relates to this topic but if you're equating p*rn addiction to food addiction, I can see your point. I'm glad you've overcome that nasty affliction.
@@rodiusmaximus lmao. think she meant eating disorder
@@carlholland3819 yes, I meant (compulsive) eating disorder, but both addictions can destroy your life and lead to the position of powerlessness.
I’m glad you mentioned that stress and the nutrition of your food is a factor cause the one girl who just says “-calories in calories out” isn’t really true… it seems like it makes sense until you realize that the food you eat has to actually have nourishment or else the low calories don’t do anything but add to the problem. I have struggled a lot with my weight because I thought if I worked out hard enough and ate less food that it would help but it actually spiked my cortisol so much that I gained more weight. I agree being obese is somewhat a choice but I have also learned first hand that it’s more complicated than just eating more or less.
Amen. Nutrient density is key. One reason why animal products are so valuable to weight loss
Exactly this. I learned this through breast feeding 3 children. They tell you breast feeding helps lose pregnancy weight... but what they don't tell you is that it doesn't work unless you are getting the base amount of calories your body needs to function, plus the base calories it needs to support making milk for your child. If you are trying to hit a calorie deficit, but it cuts into your functional calories, your body will desperately hold onto it's fat stores to make sure you have enough to simply function. It works the same even when you aren't feeding a baby, but your body will definitely hold onto more for the benefit of a child then it will for itself. A lot of women that struggle to lose weight while cutting calories are cutting so much that their bodies come to believe food is scarce. They will hold onto weight and be super lethargic at the same time, stressed and absent minded. They have to change their relationship with food and make sure they are getting nutrient dense meals that will curb their hunger for more than they need. Like the one commenter said, making a food diary can be life changing. Most people don't realize just how many extra calories come in the form of cooking oils, sauces, and dressings. They think, 'olive oil is healthy' and don't stop to realize that it may be healthier than, say, peanut oil, but it still has like 120 calories in 2 table spoons. It becomes super easy to overuse when making meals.
I have a more unique experience with this. Being large/skinny is, in 99% of the time a CHOICE. It DOES take extra effort if you have medical issues but it IS still a choice. Even in the case of a parent (what I would think is borderline child abuse) letting the child gain excessive weight. As you grow and learn it IS your choice to continue that life style. For me I have the opposite issue. I am naturally skinny. I have a fast metabolism. 3 years ago I was finally diagnosed with idiopathic hypersomnia. Basically excessive daytime sleepiness. When I started taking medication to help me stay awake, I lost so much weight I was almost down to 100 lbs as a 5'6" female. I didn't know why until I realized I wasn't hungry and was actually forcing myself to eat. Then realizing it was a rare side effect of the medication I took. However, I worked my BUTT off to get myself up to a healthy weight and thank God have successfully kept myself at that weight. But it's still a journey everyday. When I was down to basically 100lbs, I had joint issues and I was lethargic. When I would open up during my journey of getting back to a healthy weight, most would almost be jealous that I took a medication that made my appetite less. People, specifically in the fat acceptance movement (cause let's be honest that's what it is now) would tell me I'm lucky. That is shouldn't complain and that I'm "privilaged" because I'm skinny and pretty.
I'm sorry but when I eat half a sandwich and feel like I'm so stuffed because my appetite is low but I know my stomach is still empty but I can't bring myself to eat that isn't privilage. I work so hard everyday to eat enough calories to stay at the weight I am. But people only assume and I'm tired of it. I choose to not wither away, to put in the hard work to stay healthy. Don't call it privileged. You don't know what going on behind the curtain.
There's a gym in the UK with a guy (I forget his name) that literally caters for disabled people... there are people with serious conditions, like cerebral palsy for example, working out there... so having a medical condition is no excuse.
Skinny and healthy
id even rather be anorexic and unhealthy instead of fat and unhealthy
This was actually a very productive conversation. To the point where I was like okay we've reached a lot of good points here, now let's go after the FDA and the food administration, the medicine issues, and the amount of soy and supplemental ingredients that they put in food now to make it cheaper, is a real problem. People aren't getting the nutrients they need. Don't get me wrong I do feel that being morbidly obese for the majority of everyone like Dominic said is a choice. However with the other things brought up, I am willing to be in the middle ground, if we work together to question certain medical habits/the FDA. I don't feel like certain people should be on medications that they are automatically put on because doctors don't want to deal with it.
The food industry "invests" a lot of money to make/offer unhealthy food at a cheaper price than what is cost us to buy healthier (or unprocessed) options. So, even though I wish that would happen and had this conversation brought up at the Congress or else, I don't see it changing anytime soon, unfortunately.
@@bobbybenes at least more people are waking up. of course it will be an uphill battle to make good decisions in our culture but companies will respond to consumers. screw congress, when was the last time they did anything to help us? all anyone can do is make good choices for themself
@@carlholland3819 about the government - was saying especially because of the "fat free" and "sugar free" stuff (labeling food as they are - unhealthy), but I'm positive there are "interests" involved.
I'm on the same page that is a personal decision and should count on ourselves, but, for example, when the fast food chains offer food options way cheaper/faster than what a good meal cost/takes, they won't go away anytime soon.
There are some changes we could and should make a nation to have a healthier populace. One thing I think worth considering is farming and producing more food locally. Shelf life is super important when food is being shipped all over the country. It also makes food more expensive to ship and contributes to climate change in a negative way. Obviously everything can't be produced locally, but that would help a lot.
Another thing is education. In other countries they teach children about nutrition and teach them how to cook in school. It's part of their curriculum from the time they are children. If children know how to cook, shop and understand nutrition they can not only make better choices, but they won't be so dependent on fast food and highly process foods which are some of the biggest contributors to weight gain.
I'm actually getting my degree in Exercise Physiology, and one of the elements of my degree is how to work with people who have health conditions and how we can help them exercise, eat better, and become healthier through evidence-based principles and through biological responses to exercises. I love how you approached this subject in this video❤️
As a disabled person, we need this. I need someone to help me with gentle exercises.
If you aren't throwing weights around, there isn't a lot of info. Right now I just use exercises for seniors.
You can't "outrun" a bad diet. Insulin = storage mode (and no access from storage). Fix that and the rest will follow.
To all those people feeling sorry for yourselves. I'm here to say you don't need to feel better about yourselves. You need to feel awful. When you feel awful you want to change and change you will. I went from being a 5ft9 375lb teen who got traded. Now at 27 I'm 6ft1 and a lean and muscular 225. & instead of getting teased, people at work call me the john wick of carts. I'm asking all those who are overweight to go watch john wick and watch how john moves. & remember 3 things focus commitment & sheer fucking will. Find a plan that works for You and fix your life. You all deserve the best & as someone who is still on his journey it shouldn't end. Keep going keep improving. Best of luck to all those with the will to try
I can relate. Was 360 pounds at my biggest and was 6 foot 2 inches tall. My all time goal was to join the marine corps. I am now at 190 pounds and feel the best I have ever felt. I genuinely don’t know how I operated at my size. Focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will did indeed do that.
As an epileptic, I tried different diets, medication, general lifestyle changes like exercise, sleep etc. keto has made the biggest change in my epilepsy and even in my health in general, I’ve lost body fat and gained muscle. I also didn’t have the best diet… RUclipsr Isaac butterfield woke me up to this lofestyle
As a woman with a chronic pain issue, I can tell you it’s crazy hard to work out. It hurts, you have no energy, and the natural inclination is to lay down and rest. The problem is that sometimes that inclination is right. Sometimes it’s wrong. In the end, when I find the balance that lets me keep excess weight off, it’s going to help I’m the long run. Less weight means less pressure on my already strained body. It’s a struggle, but life isn’t fair. Some of have to fight harder. We’re not alone in that though.
You realize a lot do that chronic pain is due to the weight, right?
@@cincydooley it can definitely be. You also have folks like me who were born with issues like fibromyalgia, arthritis, etc etc… or developed it very young. It’s important (and difficult, as I mentioned) to keep excess weight off because of the additional strain it puts on you. Regardless of if you had it before or if it’s caused by the weight, less strain (and by that I mean too much or even going in the direct opposite direction and being underweight) on the body is always going to be better.
i recommend going on walks then jogs to build up your stamina. also dont start with a full gym routine you have to build muscle at a steady pace because if you dont youll just be sore because your muscles havent been trained for heavy lifting and such. yk dont bite more then u can chew type thing
As someone who’s naturally pretty skinny and toned I feel like genetics has to have a significant role to play. That being said, it’s still a choice for the vast majority of people (exceptions being medical reasons / medications etc). Even with it being a choice though, the workload needed to get and remain thin differs vastly from one person to the next. I wouldn’t judge anyone until I knew their habits and how they generally ate. I was a boarder in high school and spent almost 24 hours with the girls I loved with and went to school with. We didn’t have the opportunity or much money/ allowance to go and get extra food except on weekends and it was a rare occasion if we did. I lived with girls of widely varying sizes who did after school sports and are the same food as each other. Of course there are some that ate second and third servings who were large but there were also many girls who didn’t and we’re still very large.
It’s not fair the bodies we are born with, my sister is naturally skinny, eats more than me and is around 90 pounds while I have to eat under 500 calories a day to stay skinny
@@tttttv678I call bs. The only way that is likely to happen is if you have tanked your metabolism, like when my sister had anorexia.
@@TheBaumcm I am 86 pounds. I was eating the same amount as her when I was 114 pounds now I have to lower it just to be close to her
Sounds like you have an ED
@@tttttv678if you have gained weight then yes you have to eat less than "enough" to lose weight
Hey Brett enjoyed the video and your reactions for the most part. One little quibble, one of the main things that motivated me to start exercising and losing weight was the data that started coming out fairly early on about obese people having a higher fatality rate with covid so it wasn't hidden. I do want to add though that I avoided talking to randos about covid and focused on looking for facts rather than waste time arguing with people so maybe that was the differences in our experience.
A lot of people are really ignorant about what is necessary to be a healthy weight. When people talk about being poor and the connection to weight there is some truth there, but there's a certain amount of ignorance. My family was working class growing up and we were always thin, except for my mom who gained weight with having kids, though she eventually lost a lot of it. But my mother budgeted our groceries to make sure we always ate balanced, nutritionally sound meals and we were always in the healthy weight range.
I say people are ignorant because the one young lady talking about working out to lose weight, you don't have to work out to lose weight all you have to do is eat less. If you eat fewer calories than you use you will lose weight. Working out is great and you should do it but eating less is honestly more important than working out.
I do think the way our society is set up at present makes it harder than it should be for our populace to be healthy, but rather than just giving into that if you really want to call yourself an activist you should be pushing to changing those things rather than just rolling over.
I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, which makes losing weight really difficult. I also am a stress eater, which also makes losing weight really difficult.
That all said, I still have the choice to make healthy decisions. It’s a long and hard road…but I’ll get there eventually.
I agree with absolutely everything you said.
However, when I was very overweight and had a hard time losing weight after having a second child, the thing that really kicked off my weight loss was actually a touch of body positivity.
I had been rather disgusted with how I looked. And that kinda made me feel more depressed. I’d try dieting and exercising for a while and it didn’t see any results.
I was in my 20’s, plenty able-bodied. No health conditions that prevented me from losing weight.
Then I think I heard a podcast or something that talked about body positivity and learning to love yourself exactly as you are. And my thought was… they’re right! I love my body. I have carried two babies. It is a wonderful companion to my brain. I need to treat my body in a loving way instead of a hateful way. I stood in front of my mirror one day and just offered my body unconditional positive regard.
This does NOT mean I asked anyone to tell me I was beautiful. Nor did I wear revealing clothing and expect people to think it was appealing to look at.
No, instead, I decided that I was going to take better care of my body as part of my self care, as part of loving myself better. And that mindset switch has been life changing for me. I lost 60 lbs and got down to an ideal maintainable weight for my body. I never lost my curves and became a Barbie doll. THAT is genetic. I did have to learn to be okay with curves even at a healthy BMI. That’s another form of body positivity I learned to accept.
Right now… it’s the holidays, and I’m on the upper side of a normal BMI because I am enjoying myself. But I’m not worried. When the feasting is over, I’m won’t have any issue going back to my usual healthy habits and routines. And I’m not really disgusted with myself for carrying that 10 extra pounds. I am confident I can take care of that easily.
I will say that my initial weight loss journey did not happen overnight. I ended up having to keep to my healthier habits for about a month or maybe more before I began to see results. In fact, I think I gained 5 lbs at the beginning and that was hard. But I tried to just remind myself that I was making good choices, even if the scale wasn’t reflecting it yet. And then eventually, it did start to drop.
So for anyone who is struggling, I hope this offers some hope and encouragement. To me body positivity is loving yourself enough to make healthy choices. And it can start with some acceptance of where you are right now. You can look in the mirror and tell yourself “I accept you as you are, but let’s get healthy together.”
The last part, I wished I had heard that a long time ago.
I've always been on the heavier side. I struggled to lose weight no matter what I did. And because of the number on the scale, I was always shamed and told by providers that I was just destined for all this stuff to happen because of my weight. I also got diagnosed with a thyroid and a hormone condition. So I was like "well there's nothing I can do about it lol" and didn't care. But when my husband and I moved out to South Dakota I wanted to change that. So I started exercising and seeing a trainer and a dietician. The goal was to just love myself enough to make the right choices. Then I got pregnant. When I switched to a midwife at the hospital I would possibly give birth at(I was aiming for a home birth so I was still looking around for a home birth midwife) she was shaming me and said I was destined to have GD and complications because of my weight and said I could not gain more than x amount of weight. I didn't get GD despite her making me take the test twice then insisting I take it a third time. That made me restrict myself. The restriction actually caused my body to go into survival mode to sustain me and my baby. My home birth midwife was so mad because these hospital providers were doing more harm to me and because of them, I was having BP issues at 38 weeks. She helped me turn it around with diet changes (increase protein and sodium levels aka brewer diet). She also had me eat more in smaller portions so that I was able to sustain baby and I while not overwhelming myself because I was shamed into basically starving myself and my baby during pregnancy.
I ended up having to have a c section and the OB was ANGRY when I told her that the triage midwife said I had complications because I am morbidly obesed. She said that wasn't the reason. My son was in a wonky position so even if I progressed well at home, he would never have made it out vaginally.
Now 9 months postpartum, I've lost over 20lbs so far on diet and exercise (I was full on low carb but that I guess put my body into shock and it messed with my emotions as I have PPA. I still am low carb I just adjust the amount of carbs I eat based on if I exercised or not). This is the most weight I've lost in years. My motivation right now is my son. He's such an active little dude and I want to be able to keep up with him. And also my goal is to prepare my body for the next baby and have a successful VBAC.
@@Myhusbandrenamedmyhandle Yay! I'm so happy for you! What a brave and courageous person you are! Good job! I wish you long life and good health.
Intention and self love is everything - to get healthier from this perspective is the goal ❤
All of life is about choices. Literally every single thing in your life boils down to choices that you make. You may not even realize that you are making choices that will seriously effect your life, but if you are completely honest with yourself, you can trace everything going on in your life back to specific choices that you made. There is no chance, circumstance or coincidence. It's all choices. So, choose wisely.
I suppose I could have chosen to take growth hormone in my early teens. I could have and still can have major surgery to make myself taller. Yeah 100% everything is a choice.
@@rodiusmaximus , stop it. You know that's not what I was talking about. Of course, I wasn't talking about things that you can't change. Everything in life is a choice, of course with the exception of things that you don't have a choice over. Duh. My God, man. Does everything have to be spelled out?? Does no one have common sense anymore?? WTF???!!!
@@Big_Tony_Speaks You literally stated 'literally every single thing in your life...'
You literally already spelled it out. Common sense would literally mean interpreting your words at face value. Sorry for not being able to read your mind.
@@rodiusmaximus what fuckin choice can you make to change something you can't control??? Common sense isn't your strong suit is it? But, then I keep forgetting that common sense isn't so common these days. I truly feel sorry for you, if this is how you go through life.
@@Big_Tony_Speaks shit, dude! At least I know what words mean. You're the one who said everything is a choice, not me. Making sense isn't your strong suit, is it?
I'm obese. It's almost always a choice. An unhealthy one. It is hard once you're already fat to avoid those temptations. I've lost weight before. I will do it again, and this time I'm gonna make that permanent. Keep yourself around good people and be personally responsible and you'll be fine.
No you wont. You'll go right back. And you always will. You will yo-yo for the rest of your life until your organs give out.
Rooting for you bro❤❤. That's true body positivity right there!!
My wife is obese but that is not by her choice. She is a 3 time cancer survivor. As a consquence of various glands being removed to abate her cancers, she requires various meds, no fewer than 15 different rxs and upwards of 23, sides effects of a few of them are weight gain. On top of that, she had her stomach reduced and she eats about a 1/3 of her previous amounts prior to her reduction. Her weight stays above normal no matter what she does. She has the motivation to be healthy and to work out as best as her body will allow, but no matter to hom much she tries, she cant lose the weight.
The point about the average weight is interesting because what we’re really looking for is optimal weight not average weight, and the reality is that the optimum is closer to the skinny side of a skinny - fat scale.
I laughed so hard at the comment about alcoholism. I have a great uncle who is a philology professor at a university and he is the most formal, upright, responsible and boring person you can find... until he gets drunk. At all family gatherings everyone conspires to make him drink alcohol, because then he will literally become the life of the party. 😂
Dude is right in the middle of his character arc and I just love to see it. Unironically beautiful.
As for the subject, it's really irritating when people use their circumstances to justify their choices but it's even more so that they've taken to gaslighting the entirety of society at large just to make themselves feel good. It's worse still that it's worked so well.
Its as much a choice as eating the entire pie in one sitting is a choice.
I love that guy who is so honest with himself, and he made a very important point that just because something is more difficult for you doesn't make it impossible. I'm an introvert and it's difficult for me to make friends. That doesn't give me an excuse to not have friends, and I can't ignore the studies that show that loneliness is terrible for my health or claim that all of the studies are biased. We were all dealt a bad genetic hand in some aspect of life. It's better to be self aware and work to make the most of what we have.
🎯
I truly don’t think anyone is going around and saying, “it’s impossible because it’s hard.” I think we just would like everyone to stop assuming everyone can be a healthy weight because it’s “not that hard.”
Fair enough but off topic.@@iamme25yago
I was in an accident at 17 that completely ruined everything in my life. I wasn’t the healthiest eater before but I was in good shape. As I was healing I was stress eating (I know it’s terrible) but I didn’t know what was happening with my knee I was being told so many different things once was told I might lose my foot because of how much swelling was happening. After 2 years of searching for answers I finally got “some” and I say that VERY lightly. I had surgery on my knee. (19 years old) after that I got back on track started getting more active trying to lose the weight I gained in that stressful time especially not being able to move around at all. Fast forward to 22 I was in the best shape I’d been in since being an adult I was so happy and proud I still had a long way to go but I was getting muscle and was getting so much healthier and slimmer. Then 23 happened. My knee fell apart again. I was out for 4 months waiting for a surgery they weren’t sure if it was going to help or not (august to December) finally had it done had a couple set backs but I was doing good until PT wasn’t doing ANYTHING for me. The finale to my saga happily ends at 24. I found a surgery that helped WONDERS with my leg I AM finally able to walk normally no limp or anything holding me back. the absolute best part about this is, I know what I’m capable of I now KNOW I can lose weight even when my leg wasn’t doing good at all. I’m still healing from my surgery (it’s a huge surgery to help my pain in my leg) and I now know when I do get back out into the “normality” of the world it’ll be 10x better because I now have answers and I’m not going to keep making the choices that were putting on weight when I was healing (granted I couldn’t even get up to get food for myself) but now I can walk and since I’ve had this surgery and felt up to walking I’ve been walking like you wouldn’t believe! I beat myself up a lot because I have gained a lot of weight over the years but I do know this is because I haven’t been able to move at all and I’ve made some bad choices and I am going to completely change that when I get back to life.
I was in high school during the thigh gap era. But I was on the side of feeling self-conscious BECAUSE I had one. I have a naturally high metabolism that runs in the family. I don't easily gain or lose wight and the emphasis in my family was to still focus on health because especially while younger, my body may not appear unhealthy on the outside but could be a mess internally depending in choices I made.
As the body positivity movement took off I felt worse about myself because my body struggles didn't align with the "positivity" narrative.
I am fat. I don’t support this movement. I hate to move, literally.
😂
"Movement" The fat acceptance movement is the only movement without movement lol
Soo funny😐
I’ve seen my mum, my aunts, my grandma. I know I’m genetically predisposed to be on the bigger side of the scale when I get older and probably after kids, so I’m choosing to work on my weight now!!! It’s totally a CHOICE!!
Yes focusing on body image in a negative manner can be unhealthy but you have to channel that negativity and focus on understanding and learning what your body needs to be healthy.
I’d rather be fit and strong.
(But I’m 35 weeks pregnant right now so I’m opting for beached whale instead.)
I relate to u so well rn😂
@@jennynordin3001hooray! When is your baby making their debut?
@@hellyeah_ellajane already did but the weight still tryna come off....also in my last trim yea...the realization hits ..I'm so huge...🤣🤣🤣
I'm with you lol also 35 weeks. we will get back the fitness... just not today 😂
With my second who is now 4, it's took about a year/year and a half to shed the weight. I'm now back to being a fit chick 💪🏻. You can do it too 😊@@jennynordin3001
I told my doctor that I wanted some help getting in shape just some tips on nutrition, blah blah blah. I end up having to go back in three months because I was passing out and feeling drunk. she said I was having blood pressure problem so put me on blood pressure medicine which made my life insurance skyrocket where I had to cancel it. I am a 33 year old woman. I got mad about the whole thing. Educated myself stopped taking the Vyvanse and Adderall and lo and behold I didn’t have any more blood pressure issues, it severely ruined my trust with my doctor, and it all stemmed from me, wanting to be educated on nutrition. Well, thank God for the Internet lol.
I swear when you kept talking about “balance” you were gonna transaction into a Balance of Nature promotion.🤣
I was practically bed ridden for almost 3months due to major surgery. I gained quite a bit of weight and have struggled to get back down to a healthy weight. But Im making the right choices and slowly but surely Im getting back into healthy habits and losing weight every week.
I love the neckbeard guy. He is completely correct. Losing weight is hard, for lots of reasons. It takes time and a lot of willpower, and its ok if you haven't gotten there. As long as you know it's bad for you, you're an adult and you can make your own choices about what is important to you.
I'm a teen right now, and I started to make better food choices. My parents are both fit, but that is mostly because they have a good metabolism and go to the gym. I used to be really chubby, but I'm down a lot of weight now and happier. It really is a choice.
if you exercise or at least walk every day you will develop a fast metabolism
Actually, Eating less slows metabolism
Bro said research is fatphobic. I’m dying 😂
I'm a 40 year old woman dealing with ever decreasing hormones and perimenopause. It sucks. It's so easy to gain weight and so hard to lose and keep it off. HOWEVER, it is still my choice what I eat, how much I work out, etc. What I was doing in my 20-30's isn't going to work now. So it is my responsibility to adjust.
I developed an eating disorder called ARFID after a traumatic experience with food from my gastroparesis (paralysis of the stomach). From that point, I became really scared around eating food, not because of the way it would make me look, but because of the way it would make me feel. Without noticing, I started to disappear. I was becoming severely underweight. I lost all energy. I regularly felt faint. I developed depression and anxiety that made every step a battle. I am in recovery now (still not at a healthy BMI), but knowing how close I was to organs shutting down is scary. If we're defining being skinny as underweight and being fat as overweight, than I wouldn't rather be skinny than fat. But I also wouldn't rather be fat than skinny. If Jubilee is defining being skinny as being at a healthy weight, then I think the answer is obvious from the start.
It all very much depends on what the definition is. Words matter and what they mean matters.
Compared to a morbidly obese person, anyone of a normal or healthy weight could be called skinny. If the culture is fat, the healthy person is anorexic. And Western culture IS becoming obese.
You should be able to move around and engage in moderate physical activity without fainting or gasping for air. Our bodies have parameters to meet in order to function with maximum output.
This is a very good comment, underweight is generally more dangerous then being overweight. But overweight is more dangerous then healthy weight.
Image wise I think we all woukd prefer to be at least in the healthy weight range.
A lot of us are fat/thin mainly as a product of our lifestyles without dedicating much effort towards it. The hurdles a fat teen has to overcome after being raised with terrible eating/exercise habits are way higher than the hurdles a healthy teen has to overcome. A lot of in-shape people would be obese if they grew up in a different environment, and they should keep that in mind and be compassionate when criticising others
I have a metabolism deficiency due to my thyroid. I have to work a lot harder than most people to maintain my weight. My parents bought themselves expensive clothes and items, and with the little money left they bought cheaper processed foods, and I was obese under their "care." I'm so blessed to have a partner who appreciates and understands how important home meals with fresh food is to me. We prioritize putting good and healthy food on the table with our money, and that makes me so happy. And you best believe that I will be supervizing my kids when they're at my parents' house.
Being fat is absolutely a choice. In the 1950s the obesity rate was 10% and today it's 41%. If fatness was more determined by genes and intinsic factors then we wouldn't see such a drastic increase. Lifestyle, habits, education and the biggest factor, choice, determine most obesity.
I’m an RN, I see so many people that are overweight that barely eat and underweight people that barely eat. I think that we need to focus more on teaching healthy food choices instead of weight because that is going to vary from person to person no matter what we do.
I have seen multiple times of proof that some overweight people aren't overeating, there's usually something going on medically that is preventing weight loss. For me, I have hashimoto's and take medication for it and I got diagnosed with cushing's later. I started losing weight after getting both of those conditions controlled.
I gained weight after being put on antipsychotic and mood stabilising meds, to the point that i was morbidly obese. Four and a half months of dieting and doing at least 11,000 steps daily has helped me to lose 3st so far. I still have a long way to go, but i want to get back to about 8 and a half stone or 119lbs
Every piece of food or beverage you put into your mouth is a choice.
Edit: Aint it funny that the same people that are saying it isnt a choice are also saying they would rather be fat than skinny.
Try living with a medical disorder like Hashimoto's or PCOS. You'll soon learn it's not always a choice. Stop being ignorant and arrogant about other people's lives when you know nothing about what they are dealing with.
@kp4911 let's male this very simple for you because you aren't listening. There are factors in your life that make weight loss more difficult, and yes you will have to work harder, or change different things. But it isn't impossible. There are legless marathon runners. Your point is moot.
@kp4911 My family suffers from hypothyroidism. It still remains a choice. It will always remain a choice. No amount of excuse you can throw will ever make it not a choice.
While some diseases do facilitate you in gaining weight, it is your choice whether you do anything to mitigate it or just choose not to and gain weight.
While it will always remain your choice, it is not your choice on how others view you, which includes your lack of discipline and self-respect.
@@lextheap1638 I have Hashimoto's and last year got my tumor removed due to Cushing's which also causes weight gain. I lost over 50 lbs in a few months just from working on those two conditions. I now have a normal metabolism, before I could have walked 20 miles a day and dieted and that weight wasn't coming off.
I've been living with insulin-resistant PCOS since I was 16 and it has led me to have so many issues with my body image and my relationship with food. It's also so hard to talk about it because it feels like I'm always being judged for the way I look.
Omg yes! I’m 17 and I also have PCOS and I relate to everything you just said. 😢
Omg yes! I have PCOS, a tumor pushing on my pituitary gland, back issues due to a MVA, and a tumor in my uterus... I rarely eat and try working out but I'm usually in tears due to the pain.. People shouldn't talk
Yes. It’s not “body positivity” to acknowledge that it’s not just about making a better choice every time.
Same its so hard, people really don't get it
Sorry you have to go through that. There are diets that help with PCOS eg the carnivore diet or keto but it just depends on your choice to follow them or not.
4:36 What does that mean, "I was the thinnest I could be?" I feel like that was a straight lie
I'm a 6' man. When I was a kid, I could eat anything I wanted and I guess I was active enough to burn it off. Up into my early to mid-20s I was a little under weight. After I left college and started working, I became much less active, and my weight jumped up a few times. I had a friend who got me into softball and hockey, so I wasn't completely sedentary. But, by my early 30s, I was over 205 lbs, and I didn't like how I felt. (BMI says I should in the low 180s.)
At that point in my life, all it took was a tiny bit of discipline. I joined a second hockey team. And, I started paying attention to my portion size. As a kid, we're told to clean our plates, When I got older, often, those last four or five bites were very uncomfortable, because I was already full. I realized, I live in America. I don't intend to intentionally waste food, but generally speaking, I don't need worry about "wasting" that last bit of food on my plate. American restaurants serve ridiculous portions. Often, I can take 1/3 of it home for a snack later.
So, in my 30s, eating a little less and exercising a little more was all it took to get down to 185 over the course of six months. And I held that for maybe eight years.
My weight started to climb again after I passed 40. That teeny bit of discipline wasn't enough anymore.
In Feb 2012, I started using a calorie counting app. I'm currently at 4329 days in a row. I basically treat my calorie intake the same as a financial budget. I have so much to spend. If I go over for a day or two, I need to go under for a little while to compensate. They way I put it, the app has saved me from a lot of chips and chocolate. I'm aware of the calories I'm eating every time I grab something from the cupboard.
I've met many people who, on their bad days, say, "I'm just not going to count my calories, today." I have been diligent about tracking pretty much everything, every day. A few times a year, like going to Fogo da Chao as I am this Friday, I'll go 1500 calories over. I don't try to make all that up in one day. I'll spread it out over a week.
I'm over 60, now, and it really is more difficult to get the weight to come off. But, at least I've plateaued. I still play hockey, so I'm somewhat active. As the guy in the video said, it's still a choice and a discipline thing. I recognize that I do need to put in a little more effort to shave off a few pounds.
As it was eloquently put to me, there may come a day where the ability to do 1 pull-up can be a matter of life and death
there may also come a day where youre starving or freezing or trying to float and having too little body fat will kill you. im not fat but i am honest
I believe that it is a choice but its hard to make. I am a 12 year old girl who is 140 lbs and 4'8 I recently decided that I would go on a fast for 15 days or a diet just because all of my friends are skinny. I hate how I look but its so hard to lose weight even though I do softball, basketball, volleyball, and get daily exercise by going on a walk or running a mile. [Taking suggestions to lose weight]
Skinny! Me as I eat a cinnamon bun 😂😂😂😂😂
Same, I'm eating a pizza lol
Im a teen im 200 pounds..but im 6 feet so im not morbidly obese but i am over weight im trying my absolute best to lose weight ive lost 20 pounds this last month...im not doing it healthy im starving myself but im tired of being like this
I’ll preface this with, **BASED ON MY EXPERIENCE**
YES! Doctors 100% lie about medications that you, “NEED,” as well as the dosage you, “NEED,”
NO question.
Especially when it comes to medications related specifically to *Mental Health*, which is terrifying.
I’m sure someone out there who reads this can relate.
My whole life people telling me I eat to little, when in reality they eat too much. Is almost like they want to get me to be fat too 😅I never had the courage to tell them the truth “Is not that I eat too little, is that you eat too much and you are fat”, I’m not able to say that, mostly for people I love, but if I truly want their well being I should look for a nice way to tell them. Wish me luck.
Edit: isn’t interesting though how I’m the skinny one never criticized the amount their ate, and they the fat ones criticized me? I guess healthy body health mind is a real thing.
I've been both. After I had my daughter I weighed 184 lbs. I was so unhappy with myself and the way I looked. So I changed that and got down to 120 lbs. I'm 5 foot 4 and I'm much happier and have been able to maintain my weight for years. I eat less food but balanced meals. I also take a quick cold shower after my warm showers which I think has helped me a lot. I drink nothing but water now and I do have sweet tea from time to time.
I’m currently in nursing school, and my professors are still teaching us that being overweight is horrible for you health. Doctors at my hospital still advocate for healthy weights in people, so I don’t think that our healthcare system is sweeping obesity under the rug like you’d think.
dont rain on the conservative propaganda. youll get kicked out of the club
Facts I also remember in pre-med we learned the standard stuff about obesity and i recently went to the doctors a few months ago, was like barely over my bmi but they still handed me a packet about how adults should get around 3 hours of exercise a week (or preferably more ofc).
So it’s not doctors, I think it’s more so society and our many places with access to larger portions and more sugary foods & drinks paired with people’s choice to eat a lot of said things are what causes obesity. And of course exercising less or not at all.
Like I traveled to Japan and 99% of locals are normal weights there because of their culture not to overindulge, type of diets (ie a lot of rice & fish) and ofc it’s more walkable in many areas.
It’s our choices, mostly, and the narrative of body positivity as it is now is more like body toxicity, lying to yourself that it’s okay to be overweight just because a lot of people around you are. It’s pretty interesting stuff
Growing up, my family always held big reunions where there was a lot of food, the majority of my family is obese, and I'm no different. I have genetic dispositions for diabetes in my family, as I grew into a teen, I was diagnosed with PCOS, which my dr told me that was an issue for me not being able to lose weight, despite me being active often. I figured out that the hypothyroidism that I was diagnosed with when I found out I had PCOS, was actually Hashimoto's, and I didn't find that out until 15 years later. I've always struggled with my weight, and there are a lot of times I don't have the energy to do any exercise, and I thankfully am getting help from dieticians and weight management, I just don't like exercise, so I don't do it, and that's my choice. I need to change it to be healthy for myself and my future children.
Hi! Disabled woman here, thank you for putting people who REALLY can't help their weight in a different category. I've always been my BMI up until a couple years ago and I'm now 185 lbs, sometimes even 195 lbs. While I don't consider myself fat, I'm naturally more muscular and thick built so the weight I've put on definitely doesn't make me look skinny like I was. I do what I can to help myself though, making sure my disability isn't getting triggered, I eat healthier, and I recently started going back to the gym... some things help people not end up 600 lbs. I don't understand the excuse people heavier than me make unless they have similar issues that I do because if I'm able to maintain mine with a genetic predisposition for diabetes and obesity, have a physical disability, and have an issue where my body doesn't know how to control the cortisol it puts out... why can't they lose it? It really does just feel like laziness.
I've been big my whole life. I'm 5'6 and in April of 2022 I weighed 455lbs. My mother asked me on her death bed for me to lose weight for her. I promised her I would and a year and a half later I weigh 295lbs. I still have a lot of weight to loose but I feel absolutely amazing. I was diabetic, could barely walk, had a hard time getting dressed, could barely sleep more than 5 hours without my back hurting as I sleep on my stomach and was on a inhaler because I couldn't breath. Since I lost 155lbs I am no longer diabetic, don't need an inhaler anymore, I sleep a full 8 hours and no longer have back or knee pain. I can honestly say I would rather be skinny than fat. I used to think I didn't eat that much until I went on a strick no carb diet and realized how much I was actually eating. I basically only eat eggs, meat and cheese now. I chose to eat unhealthy and I chose to not exercise so yes being fat is a choice and I choose to be skinny and healthy.
Wow that’s awesome! Good job!
@@daniellehutchinson5724 thank you. I really appreciate it.
Wow. Great commitment to the new lifestyle. I know it isn’t easy but sounds like you feel the difference. It is worth the hard work.
0:01- I just want to be healthy that's it. I dream of being a parent someday and I doubt anyone can get pregnant if they're 400 lbs.(That's not my situation, just using this as an example to make my point.) I don't want high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, stroke, or any of those health problems. I want to stay alive as long as God allows me to be. Then when God says it's time to go home, but it won't be because of lack taking care of health. With God willing, my death will be due to old age and I'll be in God’s kingdom where youth is restored, tears are no more, sighing ceases because earth life is done and heavenly life begins. Hallelujah!
I usually agree with Brett 100% of the time, but I am naturally skinny and can eat whatever I want, however when I was on those lupus meds that girl was talking about I gain 20lbs in 6 months. It came off afterwards, but nothing I did (eat healthy food, exercise, etc.) stopped it from happening. It was discouraging, so I understand where she is coming from.
I can absolutely believe that your metabolism changed with the medication, but I do not believe that you became a perpetual motion machine that could maintain extra weight without also feeding yourself energy.
Things can make it more difficult or easier to lose or gain weight, but there is. Nothing that just magically adds fat to your body without consuming the necessary calories to create the fat stores. Magic does not exist even in lupus pills.
20 lbs is not 50 though. You were working. A lot of people take the medication, gain a lot more, and don't do anything about it.
There are two ways to look at your situation. You weighed more than usual because of the meds and it was a WHOLE 20 POUNDS! or You weighed more than usual and it was ONLY 20 pounds! Just as with pregnancies, some women CHOOSE to eat more than necessary (just like holidays where people eat without even considering if they are full) and gain way more weight than called for as a result, leading to a much longer period of recovery to their body before, or blame the children for the choices they make after. Point is that you ONLY gained 20 pounds, when the average is much higher, BECAUSE of your choices.
she said people taking medication was the exception
BMI is fine until your health insurance exam. lol
Most weight control comes through the diet, especially more protein, less sugar, control the calories, whole natural foods. There's also a difference between big and obese, where being big tends to be a set point, being obese means you're unhealthy. And yes, BMI is highly flawed, which is why my doc doesn't say anything about my horrible BMI.