Why Do We Feel Shame?
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- Опубликовано: 11 сен 2016
- Tori Olds, a therapist at Deep Eddy Psychotherapy in Austin, TX, talks about why we feel shame and how we can repair the overuse of shame.
If you'd like to watch more therapy-related videos by Tori you can check out her RUclips channel - / drtoriolds
Shames played a part my whole life and I find it hard contacting friends. Crazy man honestly
Fighting the shame to share this video as widely as possible.
You nailed it for me with this video! Exactly how my parents "parented".
Thank you so much!
Wish I'd found you years ago. My mother has a crippling shame-based identity, to where she's been a narcissist ever since anyone can remember. I left her to marry another narcissist with shame that became our whole lives. Thanks for the validation!
How's it going though? Any better?
With my mother, things are pretty bad, thanks for asking. It's gotten to where she is ALLERGIC to the sound of my voice. She tells family that her heart is breaking because I don't call her enough. But when I do call, she gets physically ill within 10 minutes, has to run to the bathroom, gets so upset she stays awake the whole night. For me, I find I have been subconsciously been punishing myself my whole life, so hard to break when it's this ingrained. How are you?
Good vid. The book "30 Days to Overcome Shame" by Harper Daniels, was also a big help.
Great video. I wish it last longer.
Me too happened because shame isn’t an emotion or thought anymore.
I feel shame because of one time my mom ignored me, i was excited and talking about something about scool, she shout on me , i drop school, and from that moment i can't explain my feelings, and always shamed and shy and my throat hurt😢😢
The activation of shame in your example is mixed with neglect
Being a baby boomer. My parents way back then never repaired my shame. As long as i got their point, then that was it.
No wonder it stuck with me
Yeah I realized I have been feeling deep shame towards my friends.
Because its necessary for some people to behave for the best of everyone. Embrace your shame. It helps. Its your ally.
no it isn't. shame is not required to have a conscience or as you say behave for the best of everyone. on the contrary people are more motivated to to horrible things to others by shame than probably any other emotion. (American Psycho (the book) goes quite deep into this). guilt, which you may be referring to, is 'i did something bad' and that is appropriate sometimes. shame is 'I AM bad'.
Nope. Mostly guilt has to do more with actions than shame. Shame is a result of unhealthy self interpretation whereas guilt is about rules and actions.
thanks that was real awsome :)
Wow thats such a good explanation. Could you suggest books to read up more about Shame ?
This explanation 👏
I sold my brother for no reason in front my online class 😖😣
I am madly in love with your voice. Marry me in a phenomenological way?
.... there's lot of audio disturbances..!!
Shame is the most useless emotion
That nasty feelings come from other people and they effect me like toxic
This has to be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, who is she?
Yea, that's right. 😏😓
I'm sorry this is just my opinion but to me this is very mental. The toxic shame as many call it often is caused in childhood . Since it produces a lot of stress in the body and the brain I was hoping to understand why , the utility of shame. I did not get it .
This is true, but this is not shame. Shame comes from a not having your needs met throughout development and the child, whom has an innate intuition about what needs need to be met, doesn’t have them met and infers something is wrong with them
Whoa
I wish i saw it early
I feel no shame.
Nothing to do with evolution
whole
Incorrect. Shame is the knowledge of one's own guilt. It is a reaction to the knowledge of good and evil and choosing a lesser, and realizing it embarrasses, even hurts one's ego.
Incorrect.
Shame is a social tactic used to keep people in line with societal expectations. It had nothing to do with good/evil, as that’s not even an objective thing. Humans dictate what is considered evil and what is considered good, and often times we get it wrong.
The most shameless is GG even has a beautiful body or face doesnt mean still be confident after act different with experience. You got it.. arabian fake..
I feel like she don’t know what she’s talking about….