Funny fact, there was this hottie in my gym, she was a stunner for sure. I was so into her but she didnt send any choosing signals ( yeah i used to be that guy) And one day i grabbed my balls and approached her, and everything worked perfectly fine, and she became my girlfriend eventually. For my surprise she said “ i have a crush in you too, i was just waiting you to approach me”.
She did the same to multiple guys as well. If a girl goes to a gym, she is more like seeking attention. She can perfectly workout in her own place, like a lot of us do. You got played, wait and see...
Happened something similar to me aswell. The most beautiful girl in my school definitively had a crush on me, but I kinda blew it by not being direct with my intentions, so after a few days of chatting she had enough. Lesson learned
women can not handle rejection, that is way most will not initiate a conversation. as a man all you have to do is to create an environment where a conversation can happen, that is why preselection is very powerful too.
Eye contact is an automatic response to stimuli. They don’t consciously decide to make eye contact. If they find you pleasant to look at, their attention lands on you without any conscious thought. However, they can also feel intimidated by your attractiveness and if it’s intense enough they will not make eye contact because of subconscious feelings of unworthiness. Proximity or constantly putting themselves in your sphere of observation is also an indicator of attraction and them wanting to grab your attention, and communicating their attraction in nonverbal ways.
Exaaactly 👍 Nicely said. It's kinda shockingly close to cat's and dogs if you think about it🤔 Tho, we are basically nothing more than hairless apes in suits driving cars. 😅
The thing is they (women) want leverage because everything is like a game to them. When you go up to them and ask them out, they have the power now to do what they want with you. And if you have a relationship, that power carries on with them into the relationship. You will find you losing yourself as the relationship goes on. It’s all about power bro. Not because they’re shy or scared. The other content creators emphasize on this power dynamics more then the approach.
It only stays a game if they're shallow women who play games lol. It's pretty low of you to assume ALL women are just ego based like that. There are PLENTY of dudes with stunner wives who are submissive. Be dominant and if they play games, leave. It's pretty simple.
I get your point, it makes a lot of sense, given that at a certain level of beauty, women become extremely demanding. However let's get into the philosophical and self-loving aspect of this whole point you made. If you don't care about any flirting signals from women, then I ask you - What about your uniqueness? if a woman won't show any specific interest in you, that means she's just expecting any Handsome guy with confidence to approach her, therefore it's all about ego and looks other than "hey I gave you signals because I want you and not Any guy, I like your smile, the way you talk to people at the gym, your charisma and I wanna get to know you better". So accepting women who won't flirt specifically with you, it is accepting that there's nothing genuine and unique about yourself, you're just another gym dude that she just wants to pair her look with. Doing that aren't you jumping head-one into the superficiality, inflating even more their egos and perpetuating a nonsense and egoistic one sided mating dynamic?
The short answer: it's up to us as guys to approach and show her why we're unique. We're all just strangers to her until we do, just like she's a stranger to you in a sea of women that you'll find attractive. The longer answer: the ego aspect with women is more of an insecurity than arrogance usually. She's afraid of rejection which would hit her ego, and girls try to avoid rejection at all costs. I even had a girl recently tell me that if she was ever dumped, she would try and get a guy back just to dump him so she could be the one to reject him. She agreed that women cannot stand rejection. If you're good looking, girls will also assume that you have women throwing themselves at you and they don't want to pump your ego even more, or they don't think they will be good enough. Remember, that they're pedestaling you in their mind and viewing you as being above them, plus they get nervous too. She may also admire all those things about you -- your smile, charisma, the way you talk etc, but it almost always comes back to insecurities and the fear of being shot down, so she may not display any signals. The current pinned comment on this video is a good example.
Very true. I got a girl from my gym by simply giving her a high 5 as I walked past her. She gave me a nice smile because she wasn't expecting it and I got her number before I left.
@andrebaxter4023 Come on, man... I get what you're trying to say but you can still have a rough/unattractive face, be in great shape, take great care of yourself, and suffer from a lack of attention from women.
This is true especially for Latino and Middle eastern guys because we are so used to signals due to how our women take a look or smile across the bar. In US women don’t show any signals at all. But then after the first date they always say things like, “when I first saw you I found you very attractive” which is still crazy to me. So I always assume attraction even tho sometimes I’m wrong.
Wow I love the perspective of this. Often would feel down on myself if I wouldn’t get any signals when I went out despite the fact that people would call me handsome or attractive. Thank you for this explanation bro love the videos
In a room full of women, when a very handsome man walk into room, there are many eyes from women looking at him, but no women will dare to approach the very handsome man, because all women are too scared +too insecure to approach the very handsome man, because the women are all not confident that they will get a positive response from the very handsome man. But once 1 woman approach the very handsome man, and if that 1 woman get a very nice positive friendly response from the very handsome man, all the other women realize that the very handsome man is actually very friendly and very approachable, and at this moment suddenly almost all the women no longer feel insecure and worried, and all the women suddenly rush forward to try to get to know the very handsome man, and all the women will be fighting for the attention of the very handsome man. So from being very lonely at one moment , the very handsome man is suddenly mobbed by many women , once the women realise that the very handsome man is not as unapproachable as they imagined . This is my own personal experience
Every attractive woman I see in the gym have boyfriends. I’ll be checking them out and thinking about approaching, and then out of the blue here comes their man. So my hesitation in not approaching is valid. And the crazy part is the women will be staring at me, making me think they want me to approach them. You can’t call it anymore these days. Weird times we’re living in.
Very good video. I've always waited for choosing signals so i "don't waste my time." You make very good points on why that statement is bullshit. I've been called handsome all my life & probably missed out on a shit ton of opportunities because of that mindset. Great work.
At the gym, I have a mind frame where I'm there to workout so I'll ignore everything going on and focus on my workout. What I noticed by ignoring women is it just makes them want to get your attention even more. The gym is a risk if you decide to hit up a female because of society nowadays, people right away will think you're a creep and there's cameras everywhere & people love to put everything on social media so beware.
100% about approaching at the gym being risky. But I've never gotten the whole, ignore girls and they'll be more interested in you thing. I've ignored plenty of girls and never had it make them interested in me.
@@fuzzypanda1684 It’s more of a validation thing. They want to make sure everyone is checking them out because it blows up their ego. Social media has really done a job on making society even worse.
@@andreaholcock8992 That's my point though. I'm a guy who's in head turning shape, even in the gym, takes great care of my face and overall appearance, and developed my confidence, charisma and social skills as well. Any one of those should be reason enough for girls to want me, but I still get nothing but disinterest.
What you told me about the girl in the gym working out around you and walking across the gym and back to you reminded me of something that happened to me at a gym in Kiev a couple months ago. A girl was sitting down taking a rest between sets, and she was a good distance from me. I was on the lat pulldown, and a few times I caught her looking at me from the corner of my eye. But the main give away was she was a good distance from me, and she had at least 180 deg to face her body while sitting, but she was facing directly towards me. That's a sign-her body pointed towards you or leaning towards you.
Yeah. I’ve had multiple women do the weirdest shit in the gym. Ive had two girls dance/pose in front of me and they’ve given each other piggy back rides while looking over at me. I’ve had some follow and stare at me like a creep. While my brother has had multiple women talk to him first. (Not the most attractive, but definitely bold). But yes you need to talk to them. Nothing will happen unless you talk to them first. Most women are not risk takers and cannot take rejections.
I'm been a gym rat for over a decade and never had any of this happen to me, and aside from being in great shape, I'm not bad looking either. I've certainly seen girls do goofy stuff, but not while looking over at me.
Needed this. Recently did a couple cold approaches in the new year after never trying them before (clearer choosing signals like eye contact and proximity) and even though nothing aside from conversations came from them they’ve made nights out more fun. Your videos have been great motivators man thanks and keep it up
Honestly, I only do warm approaches. I think choosing signals occur subconsciously and therefore, difficult to hide. I get looks and smiles everyday. Obviously you still have to approach, and two of my ex gf I met at the gym. Different rules for different men
Dang ppl are actually intimidated by me. This is still growing on me, this realization based on a lot of the things you said and others on here. That's why having sensory acuity and good verbal skills and intellect are essential to navigating confusing situations and playing out the highly positive traits you are expected to have w/o anyone making mention of it at all.
Looks are subjective anyway and waiting for choosing signals makes you a passive man with little to no experience with women . A lot of guys dont know that when a woman gives a guy choosing signals that actually her cold approach figuratively so if you dont approach her she takes it as rejection , so sometimes women try not to look at you as because they trying protect their ego .
At the park the other day, a woman I found very attractive came near to sit on the grass in the shade. She sat in such a way that exposed the bottom of her thighs up to her glutes while wearing a dress with a long slit. Legs Towards me and a group of strangers near me. I looked at those guys thinking "do you guys see this?!". Both her and I were wearing sunglasses so no eye contact was possible so I didn't think it was for me and attempted to act nonchalant while facing away. Then, she got up and walked away. about 50 feet away she turned to glance at me and i was pissed at myself. It had been a loooong dry spell and I wasn't on the lookout for chicks and wasn't expecting it by now. I realized I was wearing my flashy but cheap Armani watch with an expensive pair of sunglasses and that's what probably did it. 😢
I love your content and you actually get it. I usually wait for choosing signals no matter how much I like the girl because women who go out of their way to make their interest known are much easier to take out on dates. It’s much more effortless, everything flows and there’s high interest from the start vs going out with a girl you really are attracted to with mediocre interest. Mutual high interest = effortless dating
I approach hot women. I understand the choosing signals as a way to determine genuine desire. Not about confidence or game playing. Either way relationships are risk, and men make the biggest sacrifice. You miss every shot you don't take!
I was at a western dancehall in San Antonio and I was leaning against a pillar enjoying my beer watching the dance floor. Not looking to approach anyone. I girl in a black cowboy hat parked herself in front of me with her back towards me. I knew what she wanted but I wasn't interested. A guy came up to her and asked to dance. She snapped around and stared right at me almost with anger. I laughed and walked away.
Lol I once had this girl at a crowded bar sitting next to me with her body touching mine slightly. I wasnt really looking to go after girls that night, but struck up a conversation anyway. When it wasn't really going anywhere, it looked like she was angry for not stirring it into a more seductive way, like she felt rejected by me :p
My point is that there aren't many attractive woman around. today they have to many options so when she gets bored of you she just has to open her phone and go through her list... getting with woman is easy but finding a good looking woman with morals and values who is interested is like winning the lottery nowadays
That's the point, reasonable and good women won't get bored, that's a trait that society somehow over decades subconsciously placed in them. If they find someone fitting, they are supposed to settle and chill, but somehow they get the idea that it has to be chase for the next better one. If i would find a girl, i would never look out for others. I don't want to start from zero again. Build up everything again, just to maybe not even working out. "Why dump a car you restored for years, just to buy a well made scam" I don't get the thinking of gen Z and Alpha, they kinda always trying to make it even harder for themselves, but than complain why life is so hard. 🤷😮💨
So Danny, I’ve always had an above average dating life. And I’ve always had girls waiting for me when I wanted them. And given the success I’ve already had, you still teach me things. Your advice is sound and I think you are the future of this type of content, and that great things are waiting for you in this way.
Sometimes when I think about pursuing a woman I remind myself that I am not done with the body yet, loneliness is bad, but not reaching your goals is even worse 😊
Their idea of an extremely bold obvious move is to stand near you at a bar with their back turned, hoping that you will start trying to talk to her. Grow up ladies, seriously
I've been a gym rat for years, and he's right about the hotter girls rarely getting approached, but you should still be VERY careful about approaching at the gym. I have no problem approaching a girl I'm interested in, and I usually get a lot of positive reactions like smiling, giggling, hair twirling etc. But it rarely leads to anything, and if you do it too much, you'll quickly get a reputation and no girl will want to talk with you. Perfect example, an absolute stunner went to my gym and I'd seen her almost every day for a while. Like in his example, she also kept to herself and not a single guy had the balls to approach her, so I did. She immediately lit up with a huge smile, took her earbuds out, and contributed to the conversation. After a few times of seeing her, I got her number and hit her up a few days later. She never replied and after that, disappeared for about a month. When she came back, she completely avoided me. After that, I noticed that any girl I talked to was initially giving off lots of IOI's, but then wanted nothing to do with me afterwards. I didn't understand it until I saw her talking to a girl I'd approached earlier that day. So I'm pretty sure she was going up to girls I talked to and told them to avoid me.
"After a few times of seeing her, I got her number and hit her up a few days later. She never replied and after that, disappeared for about a month. When she came back, she completely avoided me" But this is just plain insanity, eh? How are we supposed to deal with this? I am a gym bro myself, approached a woman once who I thought was giving me all the signals. Got politely rejected. We still happen to be in the gym at the same time sometimes, but real conversations don't happen anymore, just a 'hi' when we bump into each other, and I doubt whether it's a honest 'hi'. When I see her again I just stay focused on my workout and avoid making eye contact. I will never approach at the gym again.
This is a interesting thought and it really makes sense. As a handsome man I know I intimidate most people both women and men. I have just walked up to women without any signals and actually pulled her I expected to get her that was my mind set. Thanks for the reminder
My experience thought and reality of on this bro if you see a girl you like you want go approach her you can't wait for choosing signals. But guys don't go out there just approaching any random women u appear needy weak ect. If u like her go for it but you're a prize men after working on yourself girls are naturally throw themselves at you
This is why I don’t cold approach girls anymore I used to do this whenever I saw a cute girl that I found attractive didn’t wait for the right moment or perfect thing to say to her I just made my move right away before it was too late
Oh, one you won't know unless you purposefully learn to see out of the corner of your eye is a double take. If she notices you then purposefully looks away but looks again as you pass by, thats massive. At that point you better come up and introduce you from the side
Honestly, what you said about choosing signals first is exactly how it works for me. Do not waste your time with women who are not interested, but go for one who is, at least a little. My experience is that of an average dude, not a highly attractive one, but I think it could be relevant for some of your audience.
I'm a personal trainer and there was this overweight woman in my gym. I would talk to her casually and got her a bottle of water one time. A few months later she said she wants to talk to me. I was thinking great I'm about to sign up a weight loss client. Only for her to ask me if I want to be friends and go do something together. She also added in a non-romantic way before I could say anything. I said why not. Then she asked what I would say if it was meant in a romantic way and I politely if a bit bluntly said that I would have declined. I gave her my number and she said she would text me. I saw her once after when she came to my class but not seen her since. This is literally the only time a woman hit on me in about 7 years. The last time it was lady who was 15 years older than me and looked like she could be my aunt.
I'm really confused about where I stand in the attractiveness scale, but I really like these videos. The thing you said about women you are not that interested in saying all this stuff about you being attractive is true for me with older women. They're always all over me and saying that I must pull like crazy and all this stuff. Oftentimes I can see how some girls trip over themselves when interacting with me like this one time I just said hi to a girl at work and she was super taken aback lol. Or other times when girls get really shy (I think) and look like they're not that interested but I feel like they just get nervous, especially not so traditionally good looking or hot girls which I sometimes find very attractive. I think the not waiting for choosing signals thing is spot on. You have to make the first move.
OH. Just went back in the video to remember it better and now I also remember one time a girl I find really attractive asking me to work in at a machine I was using. Unfortunately I didn't find out whether it was a choosing signal but I feel like these girls are usually way shy and they don't really wanna interact with people at the gym so I guess it might've been.
yes. They look for validation. I discipline myself to not look @ or give any compliments to good looking women. They keep crossing and walking back into my path and looking into glass windows or looking back to see if I checked them out. It's funny.
@jaym9675 we men gotta stop putting this negative twist on things. She approached because she has good taste. And leave it at that. Is it possible she may find someone else attractive? Yes. She has eyes. BUT she will ALWAYS come back to the person that makes her feel the way she wants to feel.
I hear ya, but here's the thing- if you approach women who don't give signals, there may be a higher chance that theyre too afraid, insecure and underconfident to give you a signal thinking you may reject them anyways and/or that theyre not good enough for you- so by going through approaching them, they will already be ready to reject you, and then you'll feel and look like a dam.n fool...Also, with your gym example- that *was* her signal right there- walking repeatedly in front of you and then checking too see if you were checking her out 🤷🏻♂️ On the flipside, a woman who gives signals- yes true many times its just playing games and a challenge for her to get attention from you for an ego boost only, that once she gets, she won't even look your way after ( esp if, at least in her imagination, she's an attractive woman), but it may also mean she's confident about herself having a chance with you *and* is interested in you as well, which means you as a man have a chance.. Thats why I love simple, straightforward and direct women, where what you see is what you get, and who actually mean what they say/give you signals of interest instead of all this annoying af time-wasting, wishy-washy "mysterious" , "hidden" bs- they're smart enough to know life is too short to play games; God bless 'em..
I get what you’re saying but one time a girl who I initially wasn’t interested in approached me and over time I started to feel differently about her. Also, there are times where I don’t know someone and it’s a matter of getting to know them that I start to feel differently about them. What do you make of that? I agree with what you say but I feel like sometimes these things build over time too. It isn’t always an at first sight thing.
I’m above average in looks for sure. But I’m also on the shorter end at 5’8”. How can we tell if a girl is actually looking at us or if it’s just in our heads? 😅 Sometimes I consider myself hot, but my shortness does put me on the not so hot end (I think)
The problem is, proximity and I contact are also things that can just happen by coincidence. I've been struggling heavily with this subject in recent months, I'm in the best shape of my life now, and I didn't really go out at all for about 10 years, from about age 24 to now 34, I'm 6'3, then lifting weights for 20 years, tan and 7% body fat (I know that sounds like BS but it's not), I take walks in the park every day as part of my exercise, nearly every woman I pass makes eye contact, it happens so often, that when a woman doesn't make eye contact, I assume she's intentionally trying not to. I'm not sure if this is just an instinctual I contact of just a human approaching, I'm a big person, so there may be some instinctual level of potential danger. I'm brand new to this kind of attention, and have to be somewhat deprogrammed from the first 33 years of my life. I'm still in the process of struggling to figure out some of these choosing signals. The other issue is, there are a lot of attractive women that live in my area, when I go out places, I find about 40% of the women attractive, it would be impossible and insane for me to approach 40% of the women in the gym, the grocery store, or the park etc. I still have fat guy brain, so my standards are not that high. Eventually I hope to iron some of these details out, being able to identify legitimate choosing signals as opposed to delusions of my own high value. I'm also told constantly that women will not be totally sold on you just from the way you look, maybe unless you are .001% level attractive, but based on my physical build statistically I'm right at that percentage, coupling that with the consistency of reactions now I'm getting from women, I'm wondering if that might be the case.
@@harrypalmer291 This type of comment dude is just really sad. You're not understanding my comment either, I'm essentially saying that I am blind to my own level of attractiveness, I don't really know whether or not women find me attractive or not. If I was obsessed with myself, I would just say I'm the best looking thing of all time, the truth is I have no idea. Pull your head out of your ass and pay attention when people are talking.
@@taggmanibanezI get ur point, in recent years i had a massive glow up and people have started to behave in strange ways around me. Like the kind of treatment ive never recieved my entire life, and am too confused weather i look good now or bad.
@@ankitmahto5323 Yeah man, I get such mixed messages every day, I'm starting to figure out that quite a lot of it has to do with people's personal insecurities, or past traumas. If a girl has been with an attractive guy before, and that guy mistreated them, all of those feelings come back the next time they see an attractive guy. Or, If the girl does not feel particularly attractive that day, she will basically try to hide, purposefully avoiding eye contact, or not have the standard mild smirk or smile when passing a stranger in the store or at the park. The other category, is jealous husbands and boyfriends who are walking with their girlfriend or wife, as they pass you, they look either pissed off, or they quickly try to grab around their girlfriend or wife's waist, or hold their hand, trying to claim them or something. BTW if you have a girlfriend or wife, never do this, it makes you look like a total psy. What I'm starting to slowly discover is that basically you just have to maintain your fitness and diet, and focus on career and monetary goals, and just leave the house multiple times a week, going to events and places where there are people, and just set your focus on enjoying yourself, not meeting women. Women can kind of smell it on you, if you are desperate for attention from them, and are turned off by it, no matter how attracted they are to you physically.
I honestly wouldn’t make the first move if she has not giving me choosing signals or any indication signs or signals she has not given me i personally would wait if shes given me choosing signals if she has not even bothered looking at me I take that as a sign ok this girl is not interested in me
Yup. Its always the 5s-7s that make the first move if that. Never the 8s and 9s. They wont show interest first until you do. Hit the head of the nail with this one
True. Yet unbelievable - how grown ass adult women still behave like school girls and rather pass up "the love of her life" than at least give clear signals. And they vote! And we're supposed to take them seriously? 🤦♂️
Sorry but you don’t see the real reason and point here. A girl need a man with balls > simple. If the man got not even the balls to approach her, it’s obviously not the love of her life. That’s why we got to approach them. We are the men, we got the balls, we got the dominance. This is just nature bro
@@gastarbeiter8384its presumptuous. Real confidence isn't measured by if u can walk up and approach a women. That's what women say because they're scared to do the work. It's shaming language to get you to persue and for her not to risk rejection.
I disagree the hottest girl I ever had a chance with dm’d me on instagram after taking it off tinder to make sure she matched with me. Like you said they will think in their head your levels above them and some of them will find ways to slide in your dm to get you to notice them. I will agree tho most if not all the times they will do the least possible to let you know. I stopped caring about them tho so unless she makes it obvious or i really have an interest in her i move on not wasting my time
I'm not saying i'm wild handsome, but with choosing signals it seems like you're more likely to get them from lower value women "on average," but since I'm not getting them from higher value women it makes me think i'm lower value, I don't necessarily believe that but it can be a good excuse for yourself to not engage. I know that's the art of approach anxiety, hvm, riz, etc. & kind of what helps girls filter through the cowards to find the masculine, damn it's confusing tho.
video about not waiting for choosing signals. proceeds to describe gym IT girl placing herself all around you over and over again. love your videos thought. situations where girls give absolutely no signals is more challenging. personally, I always make the first move, then see if she gives off any reciprocal "choosing signals".
Problem with no waiting for signals is that you might face consequences, even as an attractive guy, there are no universal chance that every woman is into you. Would most women be into you if you have classic good looks as a man (tall over 6 feet, not fat, good looking facial structure, deep voice, charisma/charm and good personal grooming and hygine), yes but it is no guarantee. Most woman that dident like you would probaby still let you down easy because you are attractive universally but some might actually see it as a chance to really fuck with you, for that reason alone. Calling the cops on you for sexual harassment, filming you and making a fool out of you online (i've seen this happend to many I would consider highly attractive men). Thoughts?
I'm apparently attractive, but I don't like talking to people I don't know. I've been approached by attractive women before, but I'm so annoyed by it that they pick up on it and don't try long. The only way I've been able to meet women is when it's kind of a situational conversation.
That girl walking past you over and over at the gym….I’m remember a similar situation I had. Never talked to her (I was working and it didn’t seem like she needed anything). I was even attracted to her. Later she dropped off her friend’s drink in the most shy manner ever. I missed my chance over and over that night without even realizing
Yeah . Where i work girls will start off not looking at me , once i warm them up they will stay be all smiles . My current one was shy but i opened her upto me , now she is the first to look at me when i walk in and will linger her looks and give me big smiles . We both know . My problem is im 42 looking 35ish , shes 25 . But point is ive had to chip away to get her comfortable then smiley. Tricky situation at work but.. its good vibes so far . Im also far better shape than anyone at work , been offered modelling due to face features .. but some girls will pretend im not there and speak to the average and unnattractive guys 😂
I've been waiting for signals of interest for 30 years. Still haven't seem one. One time a girl asked me out and I asked her why. She said she threw a million signals out and thought I was reciprocating. I had no idea what she was talking about. Waiting for signals are not reliable. I swear i have never seen one signal in my life, im probably just dense. Don't be me
There were those women for real who look from distance,but when its close neither looking and smiling regularly nor nothing, BUT in real life having children or boyfriend, hell even some of them had a fuckboy. And for women who dont do 50 % of the work which is the reality not to blame themselves for being single and leftovers. Both happened in work environment and in gym. And thats the thing they think if they simple give you few lookings from long distance, theyve done their job while the reality is they have done nothing. The positioning herself happened as well but as said when you make your research and there were never smiles,direct looks at the same time having a kid or boyfriend,or just a fuckboy worst of the worst thing youd want to find out, shit aint happening when no effort is being put. Gladly ive met a girl who wasnt from the types above,never been happier nor regretting anything and when it comes to past its easily being burnt just like that without looking back. At most to burst out in laugh.
I thought this was very good and informative information. Some of it is true as a general rule, but there are many any exceptions 1. The hottest girls at the gym that are “perfect” in what they wear etc, are very careful not to be seen giving you choosing signals. This is true. 2. But, I have had super hot girls initiate with me by sitting down next to me and or working out next to me and giving super obvious choosing signals. These girls are super hot, but don’t have the “Barbie look.” 3. The next tier down as far as hotness, they will give many obvious choosing signals. 4. More regular girls I will catch staring at me but they will not generally smile. They look away real fast. 5. I’ve had countless super hot 23 year olds do “private workouts” in front of me. All the trainers at the gym look at me with a shocked look on their faces when this happens. It’s bizarre, like the girl is in a trance. 6. If you’re practiced in improv and have humor and self confidence you can approach any girl anytime and it doesn’t matter what happens because regardless it’s a fun experience and that’s how you get good. 7. Just as a note, I’m easily the hottest guy in my gym. Full wavy textured hair, 6% body fat with a tan muscular physique, radiant skin and shiny hair, 6ft 1” tall.
There’s two times in particular I remember something similar happening to me. First time was a gym I worked at in uni. Very attractive gym girl but had a real bad case of resting bitch face and actually everyone thought she hated everyone (including me) and left her alone. Then one time I was working out in there with friends and she approached me and asked me to spot her, which I was obviously very shocked at but played it cool and had for the first time initiated conversation with her and realised she was actually quite a nice normal girl. I still didn’t have the balls to get anything from her and actually from a mutual friend found her instagram and added her to which she immediately responded with “what toon you so long 😂”. I was both scared to make the move initially cos I didn’t know for certain she was interested because the closest she came to dropping a hint was her asking me to spot for her which I thought she wanted me specifically ahead of my friends because I was a personal trainer and knew what I was doing but realised afterwards she wanted an excuse to flirt with me. Another girl in a different gym (again very attractive gym girl) tapped me on the shoulder and asked me if I could put her weights away for her (which to be fair she was quite petite and the weights were pretty heavy). I was almost in shock and awe with how good looking she was, I really nervously and quickly helped put them away and just smiled at her and quickly noticed her lose all enthusiasm. Wasn’t til after I sat back down and realised how many dudes of similar size she walked past to ask for me specifically to help her. I think another thing that hasn’t been mentioned in this video but may have been in your others is how a particular experience can affect your confidence as well. I feel like I used to be great at getting girls who would simply just smile and say hello to me but after my ex girlfriend broke up with me, I admit I was heart broken and also felt a bit of my ego go too. Ever since I’ve not been the same with women in candid moments. I’m working on it, but equally I feel like it is not as easy as saying “just be confident bro” because each rejection chips away at your confidence that little bit more.
You right they wonder why you talking to them and perceive you going pump n dump them , that hate, but keep getting rejected is what I discovered the main thing that destroys man confidence is rejection.but you right it’s a numbers game . But I also seen guys who don’t try and get them and they not even trying to get chicks , I know females smell east pray
I have a near total rejection rate. And I’ve approached countless women. I eventually stopped approaching and guess what happened ? Nothing. Nothing changed.
Hangout with dudes that pull woman. They will tell you exactly what you're doing wrong, it could be that your body language is not great or that you are too serious in the conversation.
Just for context, women before this shitty era used to put a lot on their part and actually had 'game'. Not to say the advice isn't good here, but let's not give them such a free pass pretending we just have to work around any crappy behavior they dish out.
I miss those eaus Now ALL women have regressed to literal grade school game Them saying 80% of men are trash is correct Where it otherwise thos situation woulndt be thus
This has not been my experience. The more attractive you are the more choosing signals you get and the nicer women are to you in all environments. Intimidation is only potentially a factor if its a sub 7 woman, youre not going for them anyway
In my opinion this is what I think just because a guy is good looking or attractive doesn’t mean he’ll have women approaching him left and right it just doesn’t work that way some women will try to give you glances or try to steal looks at you but most women aren’t going walk right up to you it just never happens they want the man to make the first this is just the way it is if you’re waiting for her to go up to you you’re gonna be waiting for a very long time
I get that choosing signals is a waste of time. But once you get it before you approach someone, that is going to last longer than the one you approach first. Because a lot of women want to be chased for life.
If you ask her out on a date you have revealed your interest level and are instantly less desirable. Oh! ....she accepted. You take her out and offer to pay for dinner and drinks. She instantly thinks you are a simp and your value drops in her eyes. Oh!......She actually viewed that as masculine and she's happy you are such a confident man! You pay attention to her and be charming throughout the first few dates and are instantly viewed as less desirable in her hypergamy game and she loses interest and decides to go back to her ex that treated her crappy and acts like he could care less about their future. You won my man!!!😂😂
But these things you were often describing are choosing signals, bro. Any guy with experience with women will know their choosing signals are minimal and barely nothing. You have to have the knowledge to interpret what is what. As you said, especially if you're remotely attractive, you'll experience these things. Though these are not NO signal at all. And occasionally, it's even okay to just go, but in that case, you also do a small choosing signal, and wait for hers. If you throw the first move... in a light manner, and see nothing in return, then you know.
Be interested to hear your opinion on older guys and younger women, just for casual. I get a lot of significantly younger women eyeballing me at the gym but I dont want to be the creepy older guy
when I was in my twenties. The goodlooking women were choosing the older guys. They say its always been like that. Most of them will give a guy a hrt attck tho.
I think I am giving that thirsty aura with respect to comments of my last gf and I dont have any other girls that want me. What should I do in general ?
I am average by height and weight in my country but as 29 years old who lives with his mother, I think I am below average in that area. I have a full time job btw and former gfs.
The only real deal is social-circle. All these guys in these type of videos make too much emphasys on 'cold approaching'. But for some of us it's difficult depending on our career or if we don't have a close extended family.
I am just going to be straight up, I don't want a 9 or a 10 girl because of many reasons you just listed out. They don't work on themselves and rely on their looks for everything. Looks fade, and I am a deeper person than that type of crap. I prefer an 8 with a personality and an interesting life, at least they have to work for it. I cannot even imagine dating a model, that would be torture, and no the P wouldn't be good enough to put up with the other BS.
Truth is, if you WOMEN want a man you're looking at... ..do NOT give "subtle hints". Just talk him up. It isnt worth it for a man to take a chance with you, especially if his gym membership or his job is at risk by you gossiping about turning him down.
Funny fact, there was this hottie in my gym, she was a stunner for sure. I was so into her but she didnt send any choosing signals ( yeah i used to be that guy) And one day i grabbed my balls and approached her, and everything worked perfectly fine, and she became my girlfriend eventually. For my surprise she said “ i have a crush in you too, i was just waiting you to approach me”.
Tq bro , your comment give me courage to approach girl
Wow that's wonderful thanks for sharing men you're a genius
She did the same to multiple guys as well. If a girl goes to a gym, she is more like seeking attention. She can perfectly workout in her own place, like a lot of us do. You got played, wait and see...
@@AA-gd8ywsoybean thank you for making me laugh! L
Happened something similar to me aswell. The most beautiful girl in my school definitively had a crush on me, but I kinda blew it by not being direct with my intentions, so after a few days of chatting she had enough. Lesson learned
If men weren’t simps this wouldn’t be an issue. But there are too many simps that make women feel more than they really are.
Yes
Im not at all willing to play their pathetic game
I fkn hate simps so bad
Yu do realize that yu dont kno me therefore yu cant say "all men are simps". I kno yu get no women lil bruhh.
@@LeftHimDead I know that you can’t spell or effectively articulate your point.
@@Dee-nb4cg drizzle drizzle
Exactly
women can not handle rejection, that is way most will not initiate a conversation. as a man all you have to do is to create an environment where a conversation can happen, that is why preselection is very powerful too.
Eye contact is an automatic response to stimuli. They don’t consciously decide to make eye contact. If they find you pleasant to look at, their attention lands on you without any conscious thought. However, they can also feel intimidated by your attractiveness and if it’s intense enough they will not make eye contact because of subconscious feelings of unworthiness. Proximity or constantly putting themselves in your sphere of observation is also an indicator of attraction and them wanting to grab your attention, and communicating their attraction in nonverbal ways.
Exaaactly 👍 Nicely said. It's kinda shockingly close to cat's and dogs if you think about it🤔
Tho, we are basically nothing more than hairless apes in suits driving cars. 😅
Well explained
The thing is they (women) want leverage because everything is like a game to them. When you go up to them and ask them out, they have the power now to do what they want with you. And if you have a relationship, that power carries on with them into the relationship. You will find you losing yourself as the relationship goes on. It’s all about power bro. Not because they’re shy or scared. The other content creators emphasize on this power dynamics more then the approach.
Yes exactly. It's an ego power game
It only stays a game if they're shallow women who play games lol. It's pretty low of you to assume ALL women are just ego based like that. There are PLENTY of dudes with stunner wives who are submissive. Be dominant and if they play games, leave. It's pretty simple.
I get your point, it makes a lot of sense, given that at a certain level of beauty, women become extremely demanding. However let's get into the philosophical and self-loving aspect of this whole point you made. If you don't care about any flirting signals from women, then I ask you - What about your uniqueness? if a woman won't show any specific interest in you, that means she's just expecting any Handsome guy with confidence to approach her, therefore it's all about ego and looks other than "hey I gave you signals because I want you and not Any guy, I like your smile, the way you talk to people at the gym, your charisma and I wanna get to know you better". So accepting women who won't flirt specifically with you, it is accepting that there's nothing genuine and unique about yourself, you're just another gym dude that she just wants to pair her look with. Doing that aren't you jumping head-one into the superficiality, inflating even more their egos and perpetuating a nonsense and egoistic one sided mating dynamic?
The short answer: it's up to us as guys to approach and show her why we're unique. We're all just strangers to her until we do, just like she's a stranger to you in a sea of women that you'll find attractive.
The longer answer: the ego aspect with women is more of an insecurity than arrogance usually. She's afraid of rejection which would hit her ego, and girls try to avoid rejection at all costs. I even had a girl recently tell me that if she was ever dumped, she would try and get a guy back just to dump him so she could be the one to reject him. She agreed that women cannot stand rejection.
If you're good looking, girls will also assume that you have women throwing themselves at you and they don't want to pump your ego even more, or they don't think they will be good enough. Remember, that they're pedestaling you in their mind and viewing you as being above them, plus they get nervous too.
She may also admire all those things about you -- your smile, charisma, the way you talk etc, but it almost always comes back to insecurities and the fear of being shot down, so she may not display any signals. The current pinned comment on this video is a good example.
Agree it’s a ego and bcus she expect you to holla she also loves breaking your ego
Very true. I got a girl from my gym by simply giving her a high 5 as I walked past her. She gave me a nice smile because she wasn't expecting it and I got her number before I left.
Nice bro, It can definitely be that easy
Eh to be fair this guy is super attractive, its not normally that easy lol
@@itsdannyvera For attractive guys.
@@LeftHimDead, being attractive as as a man really just means working out, sleeping well, and eating good. All easy things to do.
@andrebaxter4023 Come on, man... I get what you're trying to say but you can still have a rough/unattractive face, be in great shape, take great care of yourself, and suffer from a lack of attention from women.
This is true especially for Latino and Middle eastern guys because we are so used to signals due to how our women take a look or smile across the bar. In US women don’t show any signals at all.
But then after the first date they always say things like, “when I first saw you I found you very attractive” which is still crazy to me.
So I always assume attraction even tho sometimes I’m wrong.
Wow I love the perspective of this. Often would feel down on myself if I wouldn’t get any signals when I went out despite the fact that people would call me handsome or attractive. Thank you for this explanation bro love the videos
same. I would feel the same way. Compliments but no actual "haptic feedback". Thank you xD for having the same problem! knew I wasnt alone brother!
In a room full of women, when a very handsome man walk into room,
there are many eyes from women looking at him,
but no women will dare to approach the very handsome man,
because all women are too scared +too insecure to approach the very handsome man,
because the women are all not confident that they will get a positive response from the very handsome man.
But once 1 woman approach the very handsome man,
and if that 1 woman get a very nice positive friendly response from the very handsome man,
all the other women realize that the very handsome man is actually very friendly and very approachable,
and at this moment suddenly almost all the women no longer feel insecure and worried,
and all the women suddenly rush forward to try to get to know the very handsome man,
and all the women will be fighting for the attention of the very handsome man.
So from being very lonely at one moment ,
the very handsome man is suddenly mobbed by many women ,
once the women realise that the very handsome man is not as unapproachable as they imagined .
This is my own personal experience
Every attractive woman I see in the gym have boyfriends. I’ll be checking them out and thinking about approaching, and then out of the blue here comes their man. So my hesitation in not approaching is valid. And the crazy part is the women will be staring at me, making me think they want me to approach them. You can’t call it anymore these days. Weird times we’re living in.
They just like the attention. If you were the bf they’d still be looking for more attention.
Shit they probably did want you to approach regardless of their boyfriends😂
Very good video. I've always waited for choosing signals so i "don't waste my time." You make very good points on why that statement is bullshit. I've been called handsome all my life & probably missed out on a shit ton of opportunities because of that mindset. Great work.
i feel you bro.
Same here too 😢😢
At the gym, I have a mind frame where I'm there to workout so I'll ignore everything going on and focus on my workout. What I noticed by ignoring women is it just makes them want to get your attention even more. The gym is a risk if you decide to hit up a female because of society nowadays, people right away will think you're a creep and there's cameras everywhere & people love to put everything on social media so beware.
100% about approaching at the gym being risky. But I've never gotten the whole, ignore girls and they'll be more interested in you thing. I've ignored plenty of girls and never had it make them interested in me.
@@fuzzypanda1684 It’s more of a validation thing. They want to make sure everyone is checking them out because it blows up their ego. Social media has really done a job on making society even worse.
@@joeshmoe8952 1,000% on that.
@@fuzzypanda1684 they weren’t interested in the first place, this stuff only works if you give her a reason to want you
@@andreaholcock8992 That's my point though. I'm a guy who's in head turning shape, even in the gym, takes great care of my face and overall appearance, and developed my confidence, charisma and social skills as well. Any one of those should be reason enough for girls to want me, but I still get nothing but disinterest.
What you told me about the girl in the gym working out around you and walking across the gym and back to you reminded me of something that happened to me at a gym in Kiev a couple months ago. A girl was sitting down taking a rest between sets, and she was a good distance from me. I was on the lat pulldown, and a few times I caught her looking at me from the corner of my eye. But the main give away was she was a good distance from me, and she had at least 180 deg to face her body while sitting, but she was facing directly towards me. That's a sign-her body pointed towards you or leaning towards you.
9:10 "Learn how to operate in uncertainty and simply take a shot in a women that you're interested in." - Like these words
Yeah. I’ve had multiple women do the weirdest shit in the gym. Ive had two girls dance/pose in front of me and they’ve given each other piggy back rides while looking over at me. I’ve had some follow and stare at me like a creep. While my brother has had multiple women talk to him first. (Not the most attractive, but definitely bold). But yes you need to talk to them. Nothing will happen unless you talk to them first. Most women are not risk takers and cannot take rejections.
I'm been a gym rat for over a decade and never had any of this happen to me, and aside from being in great shape, I'm not bad looking either. I've certainly seen girls do goofy stuff, but not while looking over at me.
You might not be as good looking as you thought you were bro. Not trying to be negative
Needed this. Recently did a couple cold approaches in the new year after never trying them before (clearer choosing signals like eye contact and proximity) and even though nothing aside from conversations came from them they’ve made nights out more fun. Your videos have been great motivators man thanks and keep it up
Honestly, I only do warm approaches. I think choosing signals occur subconsciously and therefore, difficult to hide. I get looks and smiles everyday. Obviously you still have to approach, and two of my ex gf I met at the gym. Different rules for different men
Yes you have to discover your rule book
Dang ppl are actually intimidated by me. This is still growing on me, this realization based on a lot of the things you said and others on here. That's why having sensory acuity and good verbal skills and intellect are essential to navigating confusing situations and playing out the highly positive traits you are expected to have w/o anyone making mention of it at all.
Looks are subjective anyway and waiting for choosing signals makes you a passive man with little to no experience with women .
A lot of guys dont know that when a woman gives a guy choosing signals that actually her cold approach figuratively so if you dont approach her she takes it as rejection , so sometimes women try not to look at you as because they trying protect their ego .
At the park the other day, a woman I found very attractive came near to sit on the grass in the shade. She sat in such a way that exposed the bottom of her thighs up to her glutes while wearing a dress with a long slit.
Legs Towards me and a group of strangers near me. I looked at those guys thinking "do you guys see this?!". Both her and I were wearing sunglasses so no eye contact was possible so I didn't think it was for me and attempted to act nonchalant while facing away.
Then, she got up and walked away. about 50 feet away she turned to glance at me and i was pissed at myself. It had been a loooong dry spell and I wasn't on the lookout for chicks and wasn't expecting it by now.
I realized I was wearing my flashy but cheap Armani watch with an expensive pair of sunglasses and that's what probably did it. 😢
I love your content and you actually get it. I usually wait for choosing signals no matter how much I like the girl because women who go out of their way to make their interest known are much easier to take out on dates. It’s much more effortless, everything flows and there’s high interest from the start vs going out with a girl you really are attracted to with mediocre interest. Mutual high interest = effortless dating
I approach hot women. I understand the choosing signals as a way to determine genuine desire. Not about confidence or game playing. Either way relationships are risk, and men make the biggest sacrifice. You miss every shot you don't take!
I was at a western dancehall in San Antonio and I was leaning against a pillar enjoying my beer watching the dance floor. Not looking to approach anyone. I girl in a black cowboy hat parked herself in front of me with her back towards me. I knew what she wanted but I wasn't interested. A guy came up to her and asked to dance. She snapped around and stared right at me almost with anger. I laughed and walked away.
Lol I once had this girl at a crowded bar sitting next to me with her body touching mine slightly. I wasnt really looking to go after girls that night, but struck up a conversation anyway. When it wasn't really going anywhere, it looked like she was angry for not stirring it into a more seductive way, like she felt rejected by me :p
Is that a true story? I've never seen anything like that.
My point is that there aren't many attractive woman around. today they have to many options so when she gets bored of you she just has to open her phone and go through her list... getting with woman is easy but finding a good looking woman with morals and values who is interested is like winning the lottery nowadays
That's the point, reasonable and good women won't get bored, that's a trait that society somehow over decades subconsciously placed in them. If they find someone fitting, they are supposed to settle and chill, but somehow they get the idea that it has to be chase for the next better one.
If i would find a girl, i would never look out for others. I don't want to start from zero again. Build up everything again, just to maybe not even working out.
"Why dump a car you restored for years, just to buy a well made scam"
I don't get the thinking of gen Z and Alpha, they kinda always trying to make it even harder for themselves, but than complain why life is so hard. 🤷😮💨
So Danny, I’ve always had an above average dating life. And I’ve always had girls waiting for me when I wanted them. And given the success I’ve already had, you still teach me things. Your advice is sound and I think you are the future of this type of content, and that great things are waiting for you in this way.
Her eyes will always tell right away. You want to see what her eyes are saying. Vital communication.
Choosing signals appears to be safer for men and will prevent them from getting into uncomfortable situations!😮
OMGGGGG I knew I could not be the only one experienced this
Ikr, wen I started lifting choosing signals went out the window 😂
Sometimes when I think about pursuing a woman I remind myself that I am not done with the body yet, loneliness is bad, but not reaching your goals is even worse 😊
Haven’t finished this video but I just finished another. No ads or pushing anything in my face. Honest channel
It's been a loooong since I saw so real-life and down-to-earth advices on this topic.
my brooo your content is spot on all this is real life
Their idea of an extremely bold obvious move is to stand near you at a bar with their back turned, hoping that you will start trying to talk to her. Grow up ladies, seriously
😂😂it is what it is at the end of the day
I've been a gym rat for years, and he's right about the hotter girls rarely getting approached, but you should still be VERY careful about approaching at the gym. I have no problem approaching a girl I'm interested in, and I usually get a lot of positive reactions like smiling, giggling, hair twirling etc. But it rarely leads to anything, and if you do it too much, you'll quickly get a reputation and no girl will want to talk with you.
Perfect example, an absolute stunner went to my gym and I'd seen her almost every day for a while. Like in his example, she also kept to herself and not a single guy had the balls to approach her, so I did. She immediately lit up with a huge smile, took her earbuds out, and contributed to the conversation. After a few times of seeing her, I got her number and hit her up a few days later. She never replied and after that, disappeared for about a month. When she came back, she completely avoided me.
After that, I noticed that any girl I talked to was initially giving off lots of IOI's, but then wanted nothing to do with me afterwards. I didn't understand it until I saw her talking to a girl I'd approached earlier that day. So I'm pretty sure she was going up to girls I talked to and told them to avoid me.
"After a few times of seeing her, I got her number and hit her up a few days later. She never replied and after that, disappeared for about a month. When she came back, she completely avoided me"
But this is just plain insanity, eh? How are we supposed to deal with this? I am a gym bro myself, approached a woman once who I thought was giving me all the signals. Got politely rejected. We still happen to be in the gym at the same time sometimes, but real conversations don't happen anymore, just a 'hi' when we bump into each other, and I doubt whether it's a honest 'hi'. When I see her again I just stay focused on my workout and avoid making eye contact.
I will never approach at the gym again.
@@zakzwijn8410 Yeah it's rough out there for sure, just keep your chin up and keep going man.
This is a interesting thought and it really makes sense. As a handsome man I know I intimidate most people both women and men. I have just walked up to women without any signals and actually pulled her I expected to get her that was my mind set. Thanks for the reminder
My experience thought and reality of on this bro if you see a girl you like you want go approach her you can't wait for choosing signals. But guys don't go out there just approaching any random women u appear needy weak ect. If u like her go for it but you're a prize men after working on yourself girls are naturally throw themselves at you
This is why I don’t cold approach girls anymore I used to do this whenever I saw a cute girl that I found attractive didn’t wait for the right moment or perfect thing to say to her I just made my move right away before it was too late
Thanks Danny, you have a fresh point of view at many things...i would suggest you talk about pre-selection in future vids. Looking forwrd to it.
Extremely quality video man. You earned a sub
Bro tbh. This is the most relatable dating channel I ever scrolled thru. New sub here!
Oh, one you won't know unless you purposefully learn to see out of the corner of your eye is a double take. If she notices you then purposefully looks away but looks again as you pass by, thats massive. At that point you better come up and introduce you from the side
Honestly, what you said about choosing signals first is exactly how it works for me. Do not waste your time with women who are not interested, but go for one who is, at least a little.
My experience is that of an average dude, not a highly attractive one, but I think it could be relevant for some of your audience.
I'm a personal trainer and there was this overweight woman in my gym. I would talk to her casually and got her a bottle of water one time. A few months later she said she wants to talk to me. I was thinking great I'm about to sign up a weight loss client. Only for her to ask me if I want to be friends and go do something together. She also added in a non-romantic way before I could say anything. I said why not. Then she asked what I would say if it was meant in a romantic way and I politely if a bit bluntly said that I would have declined. I gave her my number and she said she would text me. I saw her once after when she came to my class but not seen her since. This is literally the only time a woman hit on me in about 7 years. The last time it was lady who was 15 years older than me and looked like she could be my aunt.
Yeah but here’s the thing I don’t care about their beauty it doesn’t affect me.
It is time for the FRAME video that you mentioned a couple of times!
You've such a charisma
I'm really confused about where I stand in the attractiveness scale, but I really like these videos. The thing you said about women you are not that interested in saying all this stuff about you being attractive is true for me with older women. They're always all over me and saying that I must pull like crazy and all this stuff.
Oftentimes I can see how some girls trip over themselves when interacting with me like this one time I just said hi to a girl at work and she was super taken aback lol. Or other times when girls get really shy (I think) and look like they're not that interested but I feel like they just get nervous, especially not so traditionally good looking or hot girls which I sometimes find very attractive.
I think the not waiting for choosing signals thing is spot on. You have to make the first move.
OH. Just went back in the video to remember it better and now I also remember one time a girl I find really attractive asking me to work in at a machine I was using. Unfortunately I didn't find out whether it was a choosing signal but I feel like these girls are usually way shy and they don't really wanna interact with people at the gym so I guess it might've been.
yes. They look for validation. I discipline myself to not look @ or give any compliments to good looking women. They keep crossing and walking back into my path and looking into glass windows or looking back to see if I checked them out. It's funny.
Content is gas def going to blow up
Ive never had to pursue a woman and never would. Remember WE are the prize.
Approach but don’t chase etc just be cool always and sit back and observe
The girls that readily come to you over your looks will readily do the same for other attractive men.
I agree❤
@jaym9675 we men gotta stop putting this negative twist on things. She approached because she has good taste. And leave it at that. Is it possible she may find someone else attractive? Yes. She has eyes. BUT she will ALWAYS come back to the person that makes her feel the way she wants to feel.
Yup, rather female nature likes it or not WE ARE THE PRIZE
I hear ya, but here's the thing- if you approach women who don't give signals, there may be a higher chance that theyre too afraid, insecure and underconfident to give you a signal thinking you may reject them anyways and/or that theyre not good enough for you- so by going through approaching them, they will already be ready to reject you, and then you'll feel and look like a dam.n fool...Also, with your gym example- that *was* her signal right there- walking repeatedly in front of you and then checking too see if you were checking her out 🤷🏻♂️
On the flipside, a woman who gives signals- yes true many times its just playing games and a challenge for her to get attention from you for an ego boost only, that once she gets, she won't even look your way after ( esp if, at least in her imagination, she's an attractive woman), but it may also mean she's confident about herself having a chance with you *and* is interested in you as well, which means you as a man have a chance..
Thats why I love simple, straightforward and direct women, where what you see is what you get, and who actually mean what they say/give you signals of interest instead of all this annoying af time-wasting, wishy-washy "mysterious" , "hidden" bs- they're smart enough to know life is too short to play games; God bless 'em..
I get what you’re saying but one time a girl who I initially wasn’t interested in approached me and over time I started to feel differently about her. Also, there are times where I don’t know someone and it’s a matter of getting to know them that I start to feel differently about them. What do you make of that? I agree with what you say but I feel like sometimes these things build over time too. It isn’t always an at first sight thing.
I’m above average in looks for sure. But I’m also on the shorter end at 5’8”. How can we tell if a girl is actually looking at us or if it’s just in our heads? 😅
Sometimes I consider myself hot, but my shortness does put me on the not so hot end (I think)
The problem is, proximity and I contact are also things that can just happen by coincidence. I've been struggling heavily with this subject in recent months, I'm in the best shape of my life now, and I didn't really go out at all for about 10 years, from about age 24 to now 34, I'm 6'3, then lifting weights for 20 years, tan and 7% body fat (I know that sounds like BS but it's not), I take walks in the park every day as part of my exercise, nearly every woman I pass makes eye contact, it happens so often, that when a woman doesn't make eye contact, I assume she's intentionally trying not to. I'm not sure if this is just an instinctual I contact of just a human approaching, I'm a big person, so there may be some instinctual level of potential danger. I'm brand new to this kind of attention, and have to be somewhat deprogrammed from the first 33 years of my life. I'm still in the process of struggling to figure out some of these choosing signals. The other issue is, there are a lot of attractive women that live in my area, when I go out places, I find about 40% of the women attractive, it would be impossible and insane for me to approach 40% of the women in the gym, the grocery store, or the park etc. I still have fat guy brain, so my standards are not that high. Eventually I hope to iron some of these details out, being able to identify legitimate choosing signals as opposed to delusions of my own high value. I'm also told constantly that women will not be totally sold on you just from the way you look, maybe unless you are .001% level attractive, but based on my physical build statistically I'm right at that percentage, coupling that with the consistency of reactions now I'm getting from women, I'm wondering if that might be the case.
You sure it's women you're after? A good mirror sounds like more your type😂😂
@@harrypalmer291 This type of comment dude is just really sad. You're not understanding my comment either, I'm essentially saying that I am blind to my own level of attractiveness, I don't really know whether or not women find me attractive or not. If I was obsessed with myself, I would just say I'm the best looking thing of all time, the truth is I have no idea. Pull your head out of your ass and pay attention when people are talking.
@@taggmanibanezI get ur point, in recent years i had a massive glow up and people have started to behave in strange ways around me. Like the kind of treatment ive never recieved my entire life, and am too confused weather i look good now or bad.
@@ankitmahto5323 Yeah man, I get such mixed messages every day, I'm starting to figure out that quite a lot of it has to do with people's personal insecurities, or past traumas. If a girl has been with an attractive guy before, and that guy mistreated them, all of those feelings come back the next time they see an attractive guy. Or, If the girl does not feel particularly attractive that day, she will basically try to hide, purposefully avoiding eye contact, or not have the standard mild smirk or smile when passing a stranger in the store or at the park. The other category, is jealous husbands and boyfriends who are walking with their girlfriend or wife, as they pass you, they look either pissed off, or they quickly try to grab around their girlfriend or wife's waist, or hold their hand, trying to claim them or something. BTW if you have a girlfriend or wife, never do this, it makes you look like a total psy. What I'm starting to slowly discover is that basically you just have to maintain your fitness and diet, and focus on career and monetary goals, and just leave the house multiple times a week, going to events and places where there are people, and just set your focus on enjoying yourself, not meeting women. Women can kind of smell it on you, if you are desperate for attention from them, and are turned off by it, no matter how attracted they are to you physically.
I honestly wouldn’t make the first move if she has not giving me choosing signals or any indication signs or signals she has not given me i personally would wait if shes given me choosing signals if she has not even bothered looking at me I take that as a sign ok this girl is not interested in me
Yup. Its always the 5s-7s that make the first move if that. Never the 8s and 9s. They wont show interest first until you do. Hit the head of the nail with this one
the fact that there is 76 likes, makes me question life.
True. Yet unbelievable - how grown ass adult women still behave like school girls and rather pass up "the love of her life" than at least give clear signals. And they vote! And we're supposed to take them seriously? 🤦♂️
Sorry but you don’t see the real reason and point here. A girl need a man with balls > simple. If the man got not even the balls to approach her, it’s obviously not the love of her life. That’s why we got to approach them. We are the men, we got the balls, we got the dominance. This is just nature bro
@@gastarbeiter8384 that's fake confidence and preassumptions
@@coryleblanc it is nature. End of discussion
@@gastarbeiter8384 it's also sexual harassment if you approach a woman with "assertiveness" and assuming she's already sexually-interested in you.
@@gastarbeiter8384its presumptuous. Real confidence isn't measured by if u can walk up and approach a women. That's what women say because they're scared to do the work. It's shaming language to get you to persue and for her not to risk rejection.
I disagree the hottest girl I ever had a chance with dm’d me on instagram after taking it off tinder to make sure she matched with me.
Like you said they will think in their head your levels above them and some of them will find ways to slide in your dm to get you to notice them.
I will agree tho most if not all the times they will do the least possible to let you know.
I stopped caring about them tho so unless she makes it obvious or i really have an interest in her i move on not wasting my time
I'm not saying i'm wild handsome, but with choosing signals it seems like you're more likely to get them from lower value women "on average," but since I'm not getting them from higher value women it makes me think i'm lower value, I don't necessarily believe that but it can be a good excuse for yourself to not engage. I know that's the art of approach anxiety, hvm, riz, etc. & kind of what helps girls filter through the cowards to find the masculine, damn it's confusing tho.
Your content is very well done. 💪🏻
video about not waiting for choosing signals. proceeds to describe gym IT girl placing herself all around you over and over again. love your videos thought. situations where girls give absolutely no signals is more challenging. personally, I always make the first move, then see if she gives off any reciprocal "choosing signals".
This Advice is literally for everyman
In summary men
Approach every woman you want and don’t want for choosing signals
Problem with no waiting for signals is that you might face consequences, even as an attractive guy, there are no universal chance that every woman is into you. Would most women be into you if you have classic good looks as a man (tall over 6 feet, not fat, good looking facial structure, deep voice, charisma/charm and good personal grooming and hygine), yes but it is no guarantee. Most woman that dident like you would probaby still let you down easy because you are attractive universally but some might actually see it as a chance to really fuck with you, for that reason alone. Calling the cops on you for sexual harassment, filming you and making a fool out of you online (i've seen this happend to many I would consider highly attractive men). Thoughts?
I like the instrumental in the back while you spitting fire 🔥
I'm apparently attractive, but I don't like talking to people I don't know. I've been approached by attractive women before, but I'm so annoyed by it that they pick up on it and don't try long. The only way I've been able to meet women is when it's kind of a situational conversation.
That girl walking past you over and over at the gym….I’m remember a similar situation I had. Never talked to her (I was working and it didn’t seem like she needed anything). I was even attracted to her. Later she dropped off her friend’s drink in the most shy manner ever. I missed my chance over and over that night without even realizing
Yeah . Where i work girls will start off not looking at me , once i warm them up they will stay be all smiles . My current one was shy but i opened her upto me , now she is the first to look at me when i walk in and will linger her looks and give me big smiles . We both know . My problem is im 42 looking 35ish , shes 25 . But point is ive had to chip away to get her comfortable then smiley. Tricky situation at work but.. its good vibes so far . Im also far better shape than anyone at work , been offered modelling due to face features .. but some girls will pretend im not there and speak to the average and unnattractive guys 😂
I've been waiting for signals of interest for 30 years. Still haven't seem one. One time a girl asked me out and I asked her why. She said she threw a million signals out and thought I was reciprocating. I had no idea what she was talking about. Waiting for signals are not reliable. I swear i have never seen one signal in my life, im probably just dense. Don't be me
Do explain the approach!
This was helpful, thanks.
lol yes. This is true. I remember I was called a "Well-rounded d**khead" by a girl before, who thought I was a player and wanted to play her.
Thanks for your wise words. It's very true. maybe we are the actual 'prize'.
There were those women for real who look from distance,but when its close neither looking and smiling regularly nor nothing, BUT in real life having children or boyfriend, hell even some of them had a fuckboy. And for women who dont do 50 % of the work which is the reality not to blame themselves for being single and leftovers. Both happened in work environment and in gym.
And thats the thing they think if they simple give you few lookings from long distance, theyve done their job while the reality is they have done nothing. The positioning herself happened as well but as said when you make your research and there were never smiles,direct looks at the same time having a kid or boyfriend,or just a fuckboy worst of the worst thing youd want to find out, shit aint happening when no effort is being put.
Gladly ive met a girl who wasnt from the types above,never been happier nor regretting anything and when it comes to past its easily being burnt just like that without looking back. At most to burst out in laugh.
You have keen insight and interesting thoughts on the issues.
I thought this was very good and informative information. Some of it is true as a general rule, but there are many any exceptions
1. The hottest girls at the gym that are “perfect” in what they wear etc, are very careful not to be seen giving you choosing signals. This is true.
2. But, I have had super hot girls initiate with me by sitting down next to me and or working out next to me and giving super obvious choosing signals. These girls are super hot, but don’t have the “Barbie look.”
3. The next tier down as far as hotness, they will give many obvious choosing signals.
4. More regular girls I will catch staring at me but they will not generally smile. They look away real fast.
5. I’ve had countless super hot 23 year olds do “private workouts” in front of me. All the trainers at the gym look at me with a shocked look on their faces when this happens. It’s bizarre, like the girl is in a trance.
6. If you’re practiced in improv and have humor and self confidence you can approach any girl anytime and it doesn’t matter what happens because regardless it’s a fun experience and that’s how you get good.
7. Just as a note, I’m easily the hottest guy in my gym. Full wavy textured hair, 6% body fat with a tan muscular physique, radiant skin and shiny hair, 6ft 1” tall.
Doesn’t work for me. Hasn’t and won’t work. I’ve always made the first move and got rejected. Never waited.
There’s two times in particular I remember something similar happening to me. First time was a gym I worked at in uni. Very attractive gym girl but had a real bad case of resting bitch face and actually everyone thought she hated everyone (including me) and left her alone. Then one time I was working out in there with friends and she approached me and asked me to spot her, which I was obviously very shocked at but played it cool and had for the first time initiated conversation with her and realised she was actually quite a nice normal girl. I still didn’t have the balls to get anything from her and actually from a mutual friend found her instagram and added her to which she immediately responded with “what toon you so long 😂”. I was both scared to make the move initially cos I didn’t know for certain she was interested because the closest she came to dropping a hint was her asking me to spot for her which I thought she wanted me specifically ahead of my friends because I was a personal trainer and knew what I was doing but realised afterwards she wanted an excuse to flirt with me.
Another girl in a different gym (again very attractive gym girl) tapped me on the shoulder and asked me if I could put her weights away for her (which to be fair she was quite petite and the weights were pretty heavy). I was almost in shock and awe with how good looking she was, I really nervously and quickly helped put them away and just smiled at her and quickly noticed her lose all enthusiasm. Wasn’t til after I sat back down and realised how many dudes of similar size she walked past to ask for me specifically to help her.
I think another thing that hasn’t been mentioned in this video but may have been in your others is how a particular experience can affect your confidence as well. I feel like I used to be great at getting girls who would simply just smile and say hello to me but after my ex girlfriend broke up with me, I admit I was heart broken and also felt a bit of my ego go too. Ever since I’ve not been the same with women in candid moments. I’m working on it, but equally I feel like it is not as easy as saying “just be confident bro” because each rejection chips away at your confidence that little bit more.
Actually the hottest girl I ever met approached me and gave me her number
Whats pretty surreal tbh
You right they wonder why you talking to them and perceive you going pump n dump them , that hate, but keep getting rejected is what I discovered the main thing that destroys man confidence is rejection.but you right it’s a numbers game . But I also seen guys who don’t try and get them and they not even trying to get chicks , I know females smell east pray
Great, intellectual content, no cocky bs. Greetings
1:45 Class in Session
5:00 🧐🤔
9:45 Summary
you know it brother
I have a near total rejection rate. And I’ve approached countless women. I eventually stopped approaching and guess what happened ?
Nothing. Nothing changed.
Hangout with dudes that pull woman. They will tell you exactly what you're doing wrong, it could be that your body language is not great or that you are too serious in the conversation.
Bro, we're in the same spot
This advice doesn't apply to genetic dead ends. Unfortunately there are men in the world who just aren't meant to succeed.
@@mafumofu986 haha. Brutal. True, but brutal.
@@AllenBaby7 That usually never works out bruhh. Being single is a choice ya kno.
Just for context, women before this shitty era used to put a lot on their part and actually had 'game'.
Not to say the advice isn't good here, but let's not give them such a free pass pretending we just have to work around any crappy behavior they dish out.
I miss those eaus
Now ALL women have regressed to literal grade school game
Them saying 80% of men are trash is correct
Where it otherwise thos situation woulndt be thus
Exactly . Before social media in the mid 2000’s girls would initiate text constantly. Now you lucky to get a text back
Damn I knew I fumbled so many opportunities 🤔
This has not been my experience. The more attractive you are the more choosing signals you get and the nicer women are to you in all environments. Intimidation is only potentially a factor if its a sub 7 woman, youre not going for them anyway
In my opinion this is what I think just because a guy is good looking or attractive doesn’t mean he’ll have women approaching him left and right it just doesn’t work that way some women will try to give you glances or try to steal looks at you but most women aren’t going walk right up to you it just never happens they want the man to make the first this is just the way it is if you’re waiting for her to go up to you you’re gonna be waiting for a very long time
I get that choosing signals is a waste of time. But once you get it before you approach someone, that is going to last longer than the one you approach first.
Because a lot of women want to be chased for life.
If you ask her out on a date you have revealed your interest level and are instantly less desirable. Oh! ....she accepted. You take her out and offer to pay for dinner and drinks. She instantly thinks you are a simp and your value drops in her eyes. Oh!......She actually viewed that as masculine and she's happy you are such a confident man! You pay attention to her and be charming throughout the first few dates and are instantly viewed as less desirable in her hypergamy game and she loses interest and decides to go back to her ex that treated her crappy and acts like he could care less about their future. You won my man!!!😂😂
But these things you were often describing are choosing signals, bro. Any guy with experience with women will know their choosing signals are minimal and barely nothing. You have to have the knowledge to interpret what is what. As you said, especially if you're remotely attractive, you'll experience these things. Though these are not NO signal at all. And occasionally, it's even okay to just go, but in that case, you also do a small choosing signal, and wait for hers. If you throw the first move... in a light manner, and see nothing in return, then you know.
Great content
Back in the 90s I see your point, but with all them feminist we have now, mostly here in sweden. There no idea doing it
Be interested to hear your opinion on older guys and younger women, just for casual. I get a lot of significantly younger women eyeballing me at the gym but I dont want to be the creepy older guy
when I was in my twenties. The goodlooking women were choosing the older guys. They say its always been like that. Most of them will give a guy a hrt attck tho.
I think I am giving that thirsty aura with respect to comments of my last gf and I dont have any other girls that want me. What should I do in general ?
I am average by height and weight in my country but as 29 years old who lives with his mother, I think I am below average in that area. I have a full time job btw and former gfs.
Get in shape m8
The only real deal is social-circle. All these guys in these type of videos make too much emphasys on 'cold approaching'.
But for some of us it's difficult depending on our career or if we don't have a close extended family.
Its also hard to be friends with girls their bf seems always uncomftable his gf being with you as their gf have a romantic feeling for you
I am just going to be straight up, I don't want a 9 or a 10 girl because of many reasons you just listed out. They don't work on themselves and rely on their looks for everything. Looks fade, and I am a deeper person than that type of crap. I prefer an 8 with a personality and an interesting life, at least they have to work for it. I cannot even imagine dating a model, that would be torture, and no the P wouldn't be good enough to put up with the other BS.
On. Point. If I would wait for choosing signals my daughter wouldn't be born yet
Thanks Danny 👊
Truth is, if you WOMEN want a man you're looking at...
..do NOT give "subtle hints".
Just talk him up.
It isnt worth it for a man to take a chance with you, especially if his gym membership or his job is at risk by you gossiping about turning him down.