Me too! I especially resonate with the possible mistype as an 8 (I can be very willful but this comes from a refusal to affirm situations/themes I know will drain me) or as a 2 (I think my empathy path skips a few steps and goes right into helping because I personally never need someone to guide me through my feelings, I would just want a show of support to help me clear space). Thank you for an amazing video!
00:25 ☕ Type 9 prefers being a passenger while driving. 01:19 🧭 Enneagram types are about motivations, not just behaviors. 02:41 🧐 Some people may take time to discover their Enneagram type. 03:36 🤔 It's normal to relate to more than one Enneagram type, but you have one dominant type. 04:27 🤝 To find your Enneagram type, ask yourself why you do things and what motivates you. 05:46 💼 Type 1 and Type 4 can be connected but are not commonly mistyped. 08:07 🤗 Type 2 and Type 4 are connected, but Type 2 focuses on others' needs, while Type 4 focuses on their own. 10:28 🎭 Type 3 and Type 4 share the heart triad but differ in motivation, with Type 3 seeking success and Type 4 seeking deeper meaning. 11:48 🤝 Type 4 and Type 5 can be confused, but Type 4 is more emotionally connected, while Type 5 is detached. 13:39 🤔 Type 4 and Type 6 are not commonly mistyped, but both seek truth and have different approaches to creativity. 15:31 🌈 Type 4 and Type 7 are rarely mistyped, but Type 4 can appear outwardly happy while dealing with deep emotions, while Type 7 seeks to avoid unpleasant feelings through fun and adventures. 16:29 🌟 Type 7 focuses on positive thinking and future possibilities, while Type 4 can dwell on the past and build idealistic scenarios. 17:25 💔 Type 8 and Type 4 share difficulty trusting people and strong opinions, but Type 8 toughens up to cope with childhood wounds, while Type 4 processes them intensely. 18:47 😴 Type 4 and Type 9 are not commonly mistyped, as they both withdraw, but Type 9 disconnects from thoughts and feelings, while Type 4 delves deeper into them.
You might be one of the first people that I heard that didn't describe sx 4s as this crazy obsessive Disney villanish type persona with no redeeming qualities. They can be that, but only if they're really unhealthy.
I was a SP in my childhood, a SO in my teenage years, and a SX in my early 20s. I’ve been it all! Ive always tried to get back to SP but didn’t understand why I changed. Now knowing the subtypes everything makes sense :)
Oooo that's tough. The first time I read about the subtypes, I felt like the SP was me, then I felt like the SX was also me. Every time I look back I'm not totally sure. Glad I discovered the subtypes. Your videos are great!
I am 90% sure I’m a 4. For a minute I was torn between a two and a seven. I watched your video on a Sunny 4 first and thought that must be me because I’m quite outgoing and bubbly, but after hearing the difference between social and self-preservation I think social must be my dominant with self preservation close by. I love your videos so much!
Thank you so much for doing the subtypes! I'm excited about this series! It's so hard to find a whole lot on subtype descriptions. I'm a 5 sx subtype and at first I was confused how at my core I'm completely a type 5 but outwardly I don't look like a type 5, can't wait for the type 5 video!
Ok as a type 5w4 SP/SX, I’m watching all your videos. There’s always something in each video that clarifies burning questions for me. By watching your videos, I can hear you say things in a slightly different way or you say something new about a previous topic which gives me my aha moment. Btw I’m going to thumbs up all your videos 👍🏼. We need your content out there!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
(HSP-Empath) INFJ 4w5 here. I discovered the MBTI about three years ago, but I am extremely new to the Enneagram typing. And based on this video, I would consider myself a SX/SO. But after reading what Lindsay Miller wrote below, I would change that to a SP/SO. So I will definitely have to do a lot more research on the sub-types. One on one connection is so very important to me, but I am definitely not one for a lot of "excitement" at any time. I tend to prefer solitude these days, yet I definitely enjoy the company and energy of a very select few. This is very interesting to me. ;-)
I’m 4 sx/so 😭 I’ve been back and forth between am I a 2 or 4 for about a year. But this and some deep digging/reading/thinking, and hashing things out with friends has helped to show me I’m definitely a 4.
I'm a 4w3 so/sx. The description of the social 4 called me out so aggressively.... "Suppressing anger and dislike in public and then later letting it out with people they trust." I say that all the time. I'm so nonconfrontational and will never be mean to your face... But I'm definitely a gossip 🤦🏻♀️😂
I am so glad I found this video. As a 4/5 I did not understand why I didn’t fit the usual 4 stereotype. I am a SP type, the “Sunny Four” you spoke of in the video. After watching your wing video I understand why I am more logical, etc. my husband recently found out he is a 9. We make a pretty good pair! Thank you again for your videos!They are really well done. 😃
Im interested in this video in knowing myself better and i can say that before i mistype myself as a two. i can say that i'm a four that doesn't show much of emotion but can feel the intensity deep inside down the soul and hate mediocres may be that will fit being a SX subtype rather that the Self-preservation as i love isolation to.
I really cannot nail down if I am SO or SX. Every description I read sways me back and forth. It’s been so stressful but I’m diving so deep to find out.
Are you selfish to a fault and have had many people tell you you lack chill, patience and tolerance? If not, you're a So 4, if the answer is yes you're a Sx 4.
Hey, that makes sense. To other people I am super happy and outgoing and friendly, etc, but at home--especially recently--that anger I never thought I could show before now comes up flippantly. Plus I WANT that deep connection to my husband, but since I'm pretty sure he's a 5, that may NEVER happen on my level. sigh.... But good point: different instincts for different situations.
@@Cherpidy Hi... I’m a type 5w4... don’t give up on your husband’s ability to one day go deeper in conversation or connection. That depth is within him. We can be so detached from our feelings when we’re unaware or not healthy. I wonder if he’s looked at the enneagram.
@@Cherpidy As a 4w5 I could Still somehow "see his"(possible) side of the 5 experience of "having a partner". The mind-part of "me" if so to say can put myself into that 5w4 way somehow when relaxed and almost meditative like right now and.. No let's stop the possible 'rant' starting here right now! Point being, I agree with Jnana ( Nice name ) and I don't know the dynamics and such, but I hope that you can "give him a chance" if so to say. If he Really is a 5, then there is potential still. Love, J
Hmm...I’m a 4w3 with a social subtype and I don’t relate to this at all (it’s also not consistent with what I have read in other enneagram books like The Wisdom of the Enneagram.) That book says that self preservation 4s are the most introverted and tend towards more social isolation (being consoled by their environments) more than other subtypes. The social subtype is typically more outgoing/friendly/extroverted because they are concerned with others and their communities and want a sense of belonging (though unhealthy 4s with a social variant can become extremely isolated from feelings of shame). Final thought is that I have read that, for all the types, sexual variants dont just want one to one connections, they want EXCITEMENT and exciting experiences of connection...not just with other people but with their world and their environment.
It defiantly will depend on who your teacher is. Beatrice Chestnut, Riso & Hudson, Helen Palmer, Beth McCord etc...all teach them a little different. My goal is to teach them in a clear and easy way to understand. And there is so much amazing info out there to continue researching your subtype. Thanks for sharing your view! ❤️
Yeah, that makes WAY more sense for me personally. UP to this last week I've been certain I'm SO/SX/SP, and maybe that still rings true. A sunny Social 4 who's externally minded but really strongly craves deep connection but is okay when she doesn't get it, all the while that self-pres is hiding emotions so the acceptably proper face can be put on and therefore SO/SP needs can be met since they rely on other people liking what they see... Does that sound nutty or make sense to anyone else?
Man, I SUPER relate to ALL of these! Gr!!! I'm struggling so much to figure out my subtype. I am a sunny 4 and very externally minded like the 3, plus I'm social and just discovered I have a terrible habit of comparing myself to others and trying go gauge where i stand in the group, whether I'm above or below, but I ALSO deeply crave that deep connection to someone. Sigh.....
@@enneagramandcoaching Well, considering the fact that I only just last night really truly discovered I am SP, I'm not sure otherwise. I want to say social second, but I really want that intense relationship with someone as well. In any case, thanks so much; you've been a big help. It's such a relief to have that figured out.
I’ve kinda been back and forth between being a 4 and 9 for a while. If I am a 4 then I would absolutely be sp/so, and I would probably also have 9 and 7 in my tritype. With all of this combined, I hardly act like how a “4” should act lol. Have you ever come across that before?
Ehehehe I was sx9 all along 😭 Y'all, be aware if it doesn't feel quite right and you're rephrasing a lot of things to fit you (for example, "I'm not sure I /really/ want to be unique, but I would like to be known and not overlooked"), it might just be the wrong type. (Also, be aware that the type 9 descriptions in many places often describe how others recieve you, not necessarily how you feel on the inside).
Laughing so hard less than a minute in bc I'm remembering some other video where you'd mentioned being a 9, and then you come in and sit next to that comfy pillow with this coffee and donut! 😂😂❤️ lol/sigh I love Enneagram, and you're awesome! Keep up the good work!
The last instinct in the stacking isn't a blindspot, it's an area of life most people don't want to pay attention to it because they undervalue it. It's not that we can't see it, we don't want to see it and deal with it. It's not important for us at first because it doesn't ring our emotional alert center as much as the first one and neither is a comfort zone like the middle instinct.
I feel you're so accurate. Helps me a lot. What should we do about our third instinct? How could we hap ourselves improve once we take notice of the existence of these three instincts?
Howdy hey! I just found out ab your channel, I love it I'm 18 and discovered I'm a sp/sx, idk if I'm proud of it but whatever lol, it's true Anyway thanks for the help!
I love listening to these videos. When testing I tested high as an eight but I am a type 4 with a 5 wing but hit the nail on the head with the sexual one for me.
I definitely crave intensity and connect better to people one on one. Romantic relationships are hard to explore because I feel they're not worth pursuing unless they're some kind of epic worldwind romance. Many poeple call me extroverted but I retreat a lot when I'm not in a comfortable environment (like when I'm out partying and having to socialize with people I don't want to talk to). I obssess over people or topics I like. I'm always fantasizing over love, sex and romance and often suffer from it. I'm pretty young, a published author and a student of Psychology. Writing is what means the most to me, but I feel I have no one to share that side of myself with and it feels like that's my true self and nothing else matters, almost like fiction is more important than reality. People say my life is so uncommon and interesting, but I've been very isolated during my childhood and teenage years. I'm not afraid of vulnerability, although I can be secretive about what brings me shame. I'm always comparing myself with other women. Men seem too arcane and fascinating at the same time. Which subtype do I sound the most like?
I'm kind of new to this enneagram stuff, but I think I know enough now to say that the type 4SX seems to be me. I'm more familiar with me being an INTJ. It seems the most authentic me is a creative type 4, and when you said the one on one (SX) I could relate to that the most.
Hilary you are just great! 😍 The first example is just perfekt for me and my husband. But the other way around. He is sx four and me sp. four. Thank you!!!
Awesome! As far as if the 4 SP have a 5 wing usually, I can see what your saying- the descriptions do match a little. Great insight. I wouldn’t say it’s common or uncommon. The wing complements your type and adds important, sometimes contradictory, elements to your total personality. Wings can be seen as personality options that people can switch between depending on their situation and health level. Thanks for your comment! Hope this helps!
I related to 4SP, but I didn't relate to the definition of the SP, I mean the SP sounded like a type 6, so I didn't really relate. Then how can an 4SP be so reckless, aren't they supposed to be the opposite. I mean this is so complicated, wish you could explain, I'm confused 😅
Actually, naranjo and his collaborators revised their notes on the subtypes and realised the reckless adjective was more descriptive and characteristic of the sexual 4, the most impulsive and instinctual of the 4s
Probably a 4 sp/sx/so, I can relate to all of the sub types. I also can relate to being a tri 478, and it seems like that relates a lot to the subtypes like you said.
ummm is it weird that i relate to them all?? like SX is definitely the most but i feel like i swing back and forth between SP and SO being second depending on circumstances and my anxiety levels.
4 with balanced wings very dominant SP and can’t decide on the next...very 1:1 but relate to Social equally, so probably about the same. Love that I’m a sunny 4, but people who know me well call me a “worrier” INFP-T
4w5 SX defs. Was confused for a long time as I was far more extraverted as a child & teen. Thanks to your explanation I now understand that I was an SO in my youth and have matured into my final SX form #supersaiyan :D now to find a loving partner to cuddle all day
i keep going back and forth between sp/sx and sx/sp. i relate more to the pure sp/sx stacking, but then when you add in the enneagram of the sp4 i almost dont relate at all and find myself entirely identifying with the sx4. im just so lost.
I'm a 4w5 sx/sp and it wasn't until I talked to my family did I realized just how strongly I expressed emotions and how disagreeable I was. Also, I've noticed most of the people I end being around either by choice or not seem to be 4s and 6s. I'm curious to see other types in person.
I’m really surprised that I related so much to social 4. Like sx, I like having a small and close circle but I also find that I bottle up a lot of feelings when socialising and have to rant to my girlfriend afterwards.
Whoa! I’ve taken 2 tests and always come out a 7. Theres so much that doesn’t feel right to me with the 7. I’ve been thinking I might be a 4 and I seem to be a sunny 4 but definitely hit some of the things in all these three subtypes..if that’s even possible!
Thanks, so I’ve narrowed it down it to SP or SX. I had high ratings on ennea 8 but which confused me, but maybe that’s just me being SX. But I got a high percentage on enneagram 1 too, that’s why I was thinking SP. I’m going to have to investigate further 🧐😂
I'm the sexual 4, although I don't see myself as a particularly sexual person. I really value my intimate relationships. I also feel anger intensely and really battle to let go when someone has hurt me in the past. I can see how others would mistake me for an 8. 8 was my second-highest score. I can relate to having the instinct to hurt the other person when I feel under threat. It's easy for me and others not to see this because I am a caring and sensitive person, but I guess I can be quite mean and ruthless. I need to be careful of this. Maybe we are just so in our own heads that we forget to consider that we can also really hurt people. It seems really paradoxical that we care so much yet can be so hurtful. It's confusing.
7! 7 is the one you should do next! Seriously trying to figure out my daughter's sub-type. I can see her as social and sexual. Perhaps after listening again I'm going with social. I'm going to have her watch and see what she says.
Oh, side note, partner finally took a mild interest in the enneagram. He is stuck between 9 and 1. I had never considered a 1 for him before, thought he was a 6 or a 9. Putting the 1 into consideration has been eye opening, because he has a very strong moral compass, and I had figured it was related to his Catholic upbringing, rather than an inherent part of who he is.
@@francesca.pellegrino Childhood trauma like that can really do a number on who you are as you grow up. I was a 4w3 as a kid until we moved to a small conservative town. I had to learn all kind of self-repression, which shaped me into a 4w5.
I'm type 4. And now I know my dominate subtype which is SX. But I don't get the relation with the 8 and 2. 8 is too '"big" or much for me. 2 is also annoying sometimes. What is the connection with them for me? Really appreciate your videos. This one indeed. Thank you.
I mean about the donuts you are the one who buy things to your kids so I think the donut is yours 🙂 but also it's like a gift for your kids so they will be mad .......if they have high Fe then you are in a good term 😂👍
She’s is one of my favs! I would guess a lot of it probably originated from her. I’ve read her books and watched her stuff. I have been doing research and taking notes from a lot of sources.
@@enneagramandcoaching www.personalitycafe.com/threads/type-4-subtypes.6092/#post-137063 This is lesser known in the enneagram community but I still think it's worth a read. Every subtype sounds just as shitty as the other.
Do you think that social fours can mistype as a 9, cuz I had a really hard time figuring out if I was a 4 or a 9, I don’t want to say stuff and my “different opinion” from my friends or just in any surrounding, but now I see that this 4 did this kinda so?
Oh my word I’m not sure. I’m a 4w5 and I’m not sure which subtype is dominant. I feel like I used to be more of a self preservation and then was a social and am now a sexual four. Do they change over time?
I'm a 4w5 trying to discover my subtype.... but I STRONGLY relate to all 3! Is there anything specific I can read or do to work out which is my main subtype? Thanks! P.S. I LOVE your videos. They've been so helpful for me as I learn more about the enneagram.
6:26 Self Preservation 4
7:47 Social 4
8:32 Sexual 4
Self-Preservation 4s, please like!
🤗🤗🤗
Im a 4sx, what you said about craving intensity is so true! Thank you for these videos!
Awesome! You’re so welcome!
Me too! I especially resonate with the possible mistype as an 8 (I can be very willful but this comes from a refusal to affirm situations/themes I know will drain me) or as a 2 (I think my empathy path skips a few steps and goes right into helping because I personally never need someone to guide me through my feelings, I would just want a show of support to help me clear space).
Thank you for an amazing video!
True, I want something exciting in my life rather than stuck in boring situation without heating up the fire 🔥🔥🔥
Its what other areas of research call ADHD tbh. Literally me.
00:25 ☕ Type 9 prefers being a passenger while driving.
01:19 🧭 Enneagram types are about motivations, not just behaviors.
02:41 🧐 Some people may take time to discover their Enneagram type.
03:36 🤔 It's normal to relate to more than one Enneagram type, but you have one dominant type.
04:27 🤝 To find your Enneagram type, ask yourself why you do things and what motivates you.
05:46 💼 Type 1 and Type 4 can be connected but are not commonly mistyped.
08:07 🤗 Type 2 and Type 4 are connected, but Type 2 focuses on others' needs, while Type 4 focuses on their own.
10:28 🎭 Type 3 and Type 4 share the heart triad but differ in motivation, with Type 3 seeking success and Type 4 seeking deeper meaning.
11:48 🤝 Type 4 and Type 5 can be confused, but Type 4 is more emotionally connected, while Type 5 is detached.
13:39 🤔 Type 4 and Type 6 are not commonly mistyped, but both seek truth and have different approaches to creativity.
15:31 🌈 Type 4 and Type 7 are rarely mistyped, but Type 4 can appear outwardly happy while dealing with deep emotions, while Type 7 seeks to avoid unpleasant feelings through fun and adventures.
16:29 🌟 Type 7 focuses on positive thinking and future possibilities, while Type 4 can dwell on the past and build idealistic scenarios.
17:25 💔 Type 8 and Type 4 share difficulty trusting people and strong opinions, but Type 8 toughens up to cope with childhood wounds, while Type 4 processes them intensely.
18:47 😴 Type 4 and Type 9 are not commonly mistyped, as they both withdraw, but Type 9 disconnects from thoughts and feelings, while Type 4 delves deeper into them.
Wow! Can you imagine if this was part of premarital counseling?!?!? It would have helped us navigate situations better.
I totally agree!!!!
Please make this a thing. 💯
Right?!
You might be one of the first people that I heard that didn't describe sx 4s as this crazy obsessive Disney villanish type persona with no redeeming qualities. They can be that, but only if they're really unhealthy.
This is very true! Thank you for sharing!
I was a SP in my childhood, a SO in my teenage years, and a SX in my early 20s. I’ve been it all! Ive always tried to get back to SP but didn’t understand why I changed. Now knowing the subtypes everything makes sense :)
Makes sense! Using all 3 is a great thing. Sounds like you used what you needed during each season.
SAME
I think as I child I was more sx/so and now I'm more sx/sp but the top one hasn't changed for me I don't think.
Oooo that's tough. The first time I read about the subtypes, I felt like the SP was me, then I felt like the SX was also me. Every time I look back I'm not totally sure. Glad I discovered the subtypes. Your videos are great!
Thanks for sharing!! ❤
I am 90% sure I’m a 4. For a minute I was torn between a two and a seven. I watched your video on a Sunny 4 first and thought that must be me because I’m quite outgoing and bubbly, but after hearing the difference between social and self-preservation I think social must be my dominant with self preservation close by. I love your videos so much!
Now I'm lowkey convinced as so/sx when some friends of mine thought I'm an sp
Thank you so much for doing the subtypes! I'm excited about this series! It's so hard to find a whole lot on subtype descriptions. I'm a 5 sx subtype and at first I was confused how at my core I'm completely a type 5 but outwardly I don't look like a type 5, can't wait for the type 5 video!
It’s coming!
Ok as a type 5w4 SP/SX, I’m watching all your videos. There’s always something in each video that clarifies burning questions for me. By watching your videos, I can hear you say things in a slightly different way or you say something new about a previous topic which gives me my aha moment. Btw I’m going to thumbs up all your videos 👍🏼.
We need your content out there!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
(HSP-Empath) INFJ 4w5 here. I discovered the MBTI about three years ago, but I am extremely new to the Enneagram typing. And based on this video, I would consider myself a SX/SO. But after reading what Lindsay Miller wrote below, I would change that to a SP/SO. So I will definitely have to do a lot more research on the sub-types. One on one connection is so very important to me, but I am definitely not one for a lot of "excitement" at any time. I tend to prefer solitude these days, yet I definitely enjoy the company and energy of a very select few. This is very interesting to me. ;-)
I’m 4 sx/so 😭 I’ve been back and forth between am I a 2 or 4 for about a year. But this and some deep digging/reading/thinking, and hashing things out with friends has helped to show me I’m definitely a 4.
I'm a 4w3 so/sx. The description of the social 4 called me out so aggressively.... "Suppressing anger and dislike in public and then later letting it out with people they trust."
I say that all the time. I'm so nonconfrontational and will never be mean to your face... But I'm definitely a gossip 🤦🏻♀️😂
I am so glad I found this video. As a 4/5 I did not understand why I didn’t fit the usual 4 stereotype. I am a SP type, the “Sunny Four” you spoke of in the video. After watching your wing video I understand why I am more logical, etc. my husband recently found out he is a 9. We make a pretty good pair! Thank you again for your videos!They are really well done. 😃
You are so welcome!
Im interested in this video in knowing myself better and i can say that before i mistype myself as a two. i can say that i'm a four that doesn't show much of emotion but can feel the intensity deep inside down the soul and hate mediocres may be that will fit being a SX subtype rather that the Self-preservation as i love isolation to.
I really cannot nail down if I am SO or SX. Every description I read sways me back and forth. It’s been so stressful but I’m diving so deep to find out.
Are you selfish to a fault and have had many people tell you you lack chill, patience and tolerance? If not, you're a So 4, if the answer is yes you're a Sx 4.
I really feel like I relate to all of them, but I think I'm more SP at work, SO at home, and SX in my dating life.
LOL! Awesome!
Hey, that makes sense. To other people I am super happy and outgoing and friendly, etc, but at home--especially recently--that anger I never thought I could show before now comes up flippantly. Plus I WANT that deep connection to my husband, but since I'm pretty sure he's a 5, that may NEVER happen on my level. sigh.... But good point: different instincts for different situations.
@@Cherpidy Hi... I’m a type 5w4... don’t give up on your husband’s ability to one day go deeper in conversation or connection. That depth is within him. We can be so detached from our feelings when we’re unaware or not healthy. I wonder if he’s looked at the enneagram.
@@Cherpidy As a 4w5 I could Still somehow "see his"(possible) side of the 5 experience of "having a partner". The mind-part of "me" if so to say can put myself into that 5w4 way somehow when relaxed and almost meditative like right now and.. No let's stop the possible 'rant' starting here right now!
Point being, I agree with Jnana ( Nice name ) and I don't know the dynamics and such, but I hope that you can "give him a chance" if so to say. If he Really is a 5, then there is potential still. Love, J
Yes, exactly!
Hmm...I’m a 4w3 with a social subtype and I don’t relate to this at all (it’s also not consistent with what I have read in other enneagram books like The Wisdom of the Enneagram.) That book says that self preservation 4s are the most introverted and tend towards more social isolation (being consoled by their environments) more than other subtypes. The social subtype is typically more outgoing/friendly/extroverted because they are concerned with others and their communities and want a sense of belonging (though unhealthy 4s with a social variant can become extremely isolated from feelings of shame). Final thought is that I have read that, for all the types, sexual variants dont just want one to one connections, they want EXCITEMENT and exciting experiences of connection...not just with other people but with their world and their environment.
It defiantly will depend on who your teacher is. Beatrice Chestnut, Riso & Hudson, Helen Palmer, Beth McCord etc...all teach them a little different. My goal is to teach them in a clear and easy way to understand. And there is so much amazing info out there to continue researching your subtype. Thanks for sharing your view! ❤️
Thee sx subtype is definitely what you write about it. This is why I immediately knew my dominant subtype is SX from this video. Holly molly. 😜🤔😅
Yeah, that makes WAY more sense for me personally. UP to this last week I've been certain I'm SO/SX/SP, and maybe that still rings true. A sunny Social 4 who's externally minded but really strongly craves deep connection but is okay when she doesn't get it, all the while that self-pres is hiding emotions so the acceptably proper face can be put on and therefore SO/SP needs can be met since they rely on other people liking what they see...
Does that sound nutty or make sense to anyone else?
Man, I SUPER relate to ALL of these! Gr!!! I'm struggling so much to figure out my subtype. I am a sunny 4 and very externally minded like the 3, plus I'm social and just discovered I have a terrible habit of comparing myself to others and trying go gauge where i stand in the group, whether I'm above or below, but I ALSO deeply crave that deep connection to someone. Sigh.....
I totally understand. It can take a while to figure this out. If you had to-what order would you put them in? For example SP/SX/SO
@@enneagramandcoaching Well, considering the fact that I only just last night really truly discovered I am SP, I'm not sure otherwise. I want to say social second, but I really want that intense relationship with someone as well. In any case, thanks so much; you've been a big help. It's such a relief to have that figured out.
I’ve kinda been back and forth between being a 4 and 9 for a while. If I am a 4 then I would absolutely be sp/so, and I would probably also have 9 and 7 in my tritype. With all of this combined, I hardly act like how a “4” should act lol. Have you ever come across that before?
I'm SP!
I misstyped as a one once, and then nearly misstyped as a seven. I always just thought I was bizzare, but this explains it so well!
Yes! Subtypes play such a big role!
Ehehehe I was sx9 all along 😭
Y'all, be aware if it doesn't feel quite right and you're rephrasing a lot of things to fit you (for example, "I'm not sure I /really/ want to be unique, but I would like to be known and not overlooked"), it might just be the wrong type.
(Also, be aware that the type 9 descriptions in many places often describe how others recieve you, not necessarily how you feel on the inside).
Laughing so hard less than a minute in bc I'm remembering some other video where you'd mentioned being a 9, and then you come in and sit next to that comfy pillow with this coffee and donut! 😂😂❤️ lol/sigh I love Enneagram, and you're awesome! Keep up the good work!
Wow! I never even thought of this. But you are so right!!!! 😂😂😂 you made my day! Thank you for sharing this!
I love that she shows the ☕️ and 🍩. Makes her feel so personable to her audience. So I’m going to say what she would say, “ I love that!!” ❤️
Loved this video, my bestie is a 4 so this video was insightful! I'm a 3 so naturally I'm eagerly awaiting the Subtypes of 3 video! 😁
Yes! It’s coming!
Thanks for the help! I've found out that I'm a 4w5 sp/so.
Glad I could help!
type 4 sp fits me great but i suck at typical SP things, I'm messy, unaware of danger, trusting and generally kinda unable to take care of my self.
The last instinct in the stacking isn't a blindspot, it's an area of life most people don't want to pay attention to it because they undervalue it. It's not that we can't see it, we don't want to see it and deal with it. It's not important for us at first because it doesn't ring our emotional alert center as much as the first one and neither is a comfort zone like the middle instinct.
Thank you so much for clarifying that! I couldn't figure out my stack because I didn't understand this
This helped a lot, more people should explain it like this! Thank you SO much!!
I feel you're so accurate. Helps me a lot. What should we do about our third instinct? How could we hap ourselves improve once we take notice of the existence of these three instincts?
Howdy hey! I just found out ab your channel, I love it I'm 18 and discovered I'm a sp/sx, idk if I'm proud of it but whatever lol, it's true
Anyway thanks for the help!
Welcome aboard!
Yes, definitely sx 4
I'm pretty sure (so) social is my least dominant one. And sexual is my dominant one or possibly self preservation so (4w5 sx/sp)
I love listening to these videos. When testing I tested high as an eight but I am a type 4 with a 5 wing but hit the nail on the head with the sexual one for me.
I definitely crave intensity and connect better to people one on one. Romantic relationships are hard to explore because I feel they're not worth pursuing unless they're some kind of epic worldwind romance. Many poeple call me extroverted but I retreat a lot when I'm not in a comfortable environment (like when I'm out partying and having to socialize with people I don't want to talk to). I obssess over people or topics I like. I'm always fantasizing over love, sex and romance and often suffer from it. I'm pretty young, a published author and a student of Psychology. Writing is what means the most to me, but I feel I have no one to share that side of myself with and it feels like that's my true self and nothing else matters, almost like fiction is more important than reality. People say my life is so uncommon and interesting, but I've been very isolated during my childhood and teenage years. I'm not afraid of vulnerability, although I can be secretive about what brings me shame. I'm always comparing myself with other women. Men seem too arcane and fascinating at the same time. Which subtype do I sound the most like?
This was such a useful and helpful video! Thank you!
Yay! You are so welcome!
I'm kind of new to this enneagram stuff, but I think I know enough now to say that the type 4SX seems to be me.
I'm more familiar with me being an INTJ. It seems the most authentic me is a creative type 4, and when you said the one on one (SX) I could relate to that the most.
Nice, thank you for the info! Looking forward for other types.
❤️❤️❤️
Hilary you are just great! 😍
The first example is just perfekt for me and my husband. But the other way around. He is sx four and me sp. four. Thank you!!!
Thank you! ❤️
I think I'm a 4 SP and I finally understand why I've been often mistyped as a 7!
researching 4s and how they work with the subtypes really helped me confirm that I was a 4 and not a 6 as I was often mistyped as because I'm a So 4
Same 😭
Im definitely a SP/SO 4w5. I can look like a 7w6 and a 9w1 at times, but im truly a 4w5.
I think I'm a 4 SP! Is it more common for a 4 SP to have a 5 wing? I feel like a lot of the self preservation descriptions match a 5 description.
Awesome! As far as if the 4 SP have a 5 wing usually, I can see what your saying- the descriptions do match a little. Great insight. I wouldn’t say it’s common or uncommon. The wing complements your type and adds important, sometimes contradictory, elements to your total personality. Wings can be seen as personality options that people can switch between depending on their situation and health level. Thanks for your comment! Hope this helps!
I related to 4SP, but I didn't relate to the definition of the SP, I mean the SP sounded like a type 6, so I didn't really relate. Then how can an 4SP be so reckless, aren't they supposed to be the opposite. I mean this is so complicated, wish you could explain, I'm confused 😅
It can be so complicated! The SP definition is an overview for all 9 types...so that’s understandable.
Actually, naranjo and his collaborators revised their notes on the subtypes and realised the reckless adjective was more descriptive and characteristic of the sexual 4, the most impulsive and instinctual of the 4s
Good information! Thank you for sharing.
You’re so welcome Margaret!
Probably a 4 sp/sx/so, I can relate to all of the sub types. I also can relate to being a tri 478, and it seems like that relates a lot to the subtypes like you said.
ummm is it weird that i relate to them all?? like SX is definitely the most but i feel like i swing back and forth between SP and SO being second depending on circumstances and my anxiety levels.
I think im a sx 4 childhood was chaotic and intense and now living in japan 😅 its so peaceful that i get bored i think im an sx/sp
I think I'm a 4 so/sp, there are so many things of both so and sp that I relate to, the sx description doesn't sound like me at all
4 with balanced wings very dominant SP and can’t decide on the next...very 1:1 but relate to Social equally, so probably about the same.
Love that I’m a sunny 4, but people who know me well call me a “worrier”
INFP-T
4w5 SX defs. Was confused for a long time as I was far more extraverted as a child & teen. Thanks to your explanation I now understand that I was an SO in my youth and have matured into my final SX form #supersaiyan :D now to find a loving partner to cuddle all day
Glad it helped! Love this!
i keep going back and forth between sp/sx and sx/sp. i relate more to the pure sp/sx stacking, but then when you add in the enneagram of the sp4 i almost dont relate at all and find myself entirely identifying with the sx4. im just so lost.
I can identify with all three, but mostly sx.
I'm a 4w5 sx/sp and it wasn't until I talked to my family did I realized just how strongly I expressed emotions and how disagreeable I was. Also, I've noticed most of the people I end being around either by choice or not seem to be 4s and 6s. I'm curious to see other types in person.
4w5 SP/SX.
didn’t realize i was a social 4 because im so socially anxious
I'm 4, not knowing the wings because I relate to both, and also SO, not knowing the second one because I relate to both... again! 😂
😂😂😂
Dang, the social 4 subtype is looking a little too familiar
:)
I’m really surprised that I related so much to social 4. Like sx, I like having a small and close circle but I also find that I bottle up a lot of feelings when socialising and have to rant to my girlfriend afterwards.
took 6.5 minutes including an add to get to the first description
Whoa! I’ve taken 2 tests and always come out a 7. Theres so much that doesn’t feel right to me with the 7. I’ve been thinking I might be a 4 and I seem to be a sunny 4 but definitely hit some of the things in all these three subtypes..if that’s even possible!
I think I’m INTJ-A 4w5 sx/so
I am divided between SO and One to one
What type(s) are most compatible with type 4s?
I think I’m a Sunny 4. So maybe I’m a SP.
I just can relate so much with 1s and 7s.
Maybe SO is my second one. But I still see the SX on me.
Thanks, so I’ve narrowed it down it to SP or SX. I had high ratings on ennea 8 but which confused me, but maybe that’s just me being SX. But I got a high percentage on enneagram 1 too, that’s why I was thinking SP. I’m going to have to investigate further 🧐😂
I think I’m so/sx 4. I might be a 1, though. Thanks:)
You're so welcome!
We love a 5 minute intro.
I think that I've finally narrowed down that I'm a 4w5 so/sx
I'm the sexual 4, although I don't see myself as a particularly sexual person. I really value my intimate relationships. I also feel anger intensely and really battle to let go when someone has hurt me in the past. I can see how others would mistake me for an 8. 8 was my second-highest score. I can relate to having the instinct to hurt the other person when I feel under threat. It's easy for me and others not to see this because I am a caring and sensitive person, but I guess I can be quite mean and ruthless. I need to be careful of this. Maybe we are just so in our own heads that we forget to consider that we can also really hurt people. It seems really paradoxical that we care so much yet can be so hurtful. It's confusing.
Where did you take the test
I'd 100% rather work from home instead of having to deal with humanity
7! 7 is the one you should do next! Seriously trying to figure out my daughter's sub-type. I can see her as social and sexual. Perhaps after listening again I'm going with social. I'm going to have her watch and see what she says.
Oh, side note, partner finally took a mild interest in the enneagram. He is stuck between 9 and 1. I had never considered a 1 for him before, thought he was a 6 or a 9. Putting the 1 into consideration has been eye opening, because he has a very strong moral compass, and I had figured it was related to his Catholic upbringing, rather than an inherent part of who he is.
Oh yay!!! He might be a 1w9.
Definitely an option! Probably the most likely.
@@francesca.pellegrino Childhood trauma like that can really do a number on who you are as you grow up. I was a 4w3 as a kid until we moved to a small conservative town. I had to learn all kind of self-repression, which shaped me into a 4w5.
@@L_o_c_a_l_G_u_y Oh, yeah, wings change depending on your current situation and state, since they're more like "aspects" of the main type.
THREE PLEASE!
Alright.. 04:50 06:25
I'm type 4. And now I know my dominate subtype which is SX. But I don't get the relation with the 8 and 2. 8 is too '"big" or much for me. 2 is also annoying sometimes. What is the connection with them for me? Really appreciate your videos. This one indeed. Thank you.
Same. I'm an sx 4 and I don't get the relation to 8 or2 either. I think there is some confusion and misunderstanding with this..
do you think tritypes are important and have you or are you planning on doing videos on it in the future?
I’m not sure if I’m going to do a video on them. I’ll let you know if I do 😃 I think Katherine Fauvre teaches it the best I’ve seen so far.
Haha yeah.. 4w3 sx/sp - both a blessing and a curse. 🙈
I could relate to a little of all of them and I still don’t know... 😂
The music in the video is too loud and distracting 🙈
Lol, skipping around! Nice way to shake things up!
Thanks for noticing. I’m trying new things! 😂
Thank you!!!
You’re so welcome!
I mean about the donuts you are the one who buy things to your kids so I think the donut is yours 🙂 but also it's like a gift for your kids so they will be mad .......if they have high Fe then you are in a good term 😂👍
Thank you for explaining the subtypes! It was very helpful and explanatory☺️ And i am probably Infp 4w3 sx/so 417 :))
You're so welcome!
What are the social 4’s mistyped as?
I've seen type 3s, 5s and 6s. It all depends on the wing and the level of health.
I could relate to all of them 😮
1st - Learn to use a lot as a child for survival.
2nd - Use a lot, but not dominant.
3rd - Don’t know it’s there or don’t use it
🤯
SX i think
Wow all of this just sounds like talking in circles I have almost idea what was said. I only just found out about types the other day
You got all your info from chestnut, right?
She’s is one of my favs! I would guess a lot of it probably originated from her. I’ve read her books and watched her stuff. I have been doing research and taking notes from a lot of sources.
@@enneagramandcoaching shes definitely not my fav.
Really. Who is your favorite?
@@enneagramandcoaching well, I have many favs: Ichazo, Clarence Thomson, Sandra Maitri and Tom Condon
@@enneagramandcoaching www.personalitycafe.com/threads/type-4-subtypes.6092/#post-137063 This is lesser known in the enneagram community but I still think it's worth a read. Every subtype sounds just as shitty as the other.
I feel like I’m all...
Do you think that social fours can mistype as a 9, cuz I had a really hard time figuring out if I was a 4 or a 9, I don’t want to say stuff and my “different opinion” from my friends or just in any surrounding, but now I see that this 4 did this kinda so?
I'm a 4w5 Sx 😀✨
❤
Finally :D
Right?!?! It’s was so time!!!!!
LOL!!!!!
@@ArcticBlizzard so sorry lol. Next time
SX for me.
sp/sx 4w5 here. :)
❤️
Oh my word I’m not sure. I’m a 4w5 and I’m not sure which subtype is dominant.
I feel like I used to be more of a self preservation and then was a social and am now a sexual four.
Do they change over time?
Yes they can. You have all 3 instincts. And you can use all 3. Your dominant can change when your needs change.
I'm a 4w5 trying to discover my subtype.... but I STRONGLY relate to all 3! Is there anything specific I can read or do to work out which is my main subtype? Thanks! P.S. I LOVE your videos. They've been so helpful for me as I learn more about the enneagram.
Love this! Yes, Beatrice Chestnut has a wonderful Subtypes book. The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-Knowledge
I am such a so4
i just realized i'm a SO and not a SP
not sure. Probably SP but I dont feel strongly about any of them. But I may be a 9 so......haha
😂
Probably sx/so