It is, I grew up with very bad anxiety, but I never had a panic attack until I was 16. I’ve experienced uncontrollable twitches, sweating, and shakes, but nothing prepared me for the panic attack. You really feel like you’re having a heart attack-
Therapist here: panic and anxiety are REAL, PHYSICAL conditions. The ER wasn't super helpful because the CAUSE was psychological rather than physical, not because the physical experience wasn't very, very REAL. Anytime people minimize what they're going through by saying "it's all in my head," I remind them that literally everything is in your head; that's how we experience the world, through our minds and perspectives. Your experiences are real.
Haha, I know it’s “all in my head,” that’s the problem. Instead of minimizing my anxious meltdown, let’s try to work together to curb my anxiety so I don’t end up vomiting in the middle of my Communications lecture again. For some reason, I can’t summon those words when I really need them. But it’s nice to know that there’s a physiological explanation for these episodes even if it’s triggered by a psychological state instead of an infection.
When I was 12 I was a severe hypochondriac, and I convinced myself I had cancer, a stroke, a brain tumor, and heart disease. I thought I was going to die at every moment, and I wanted to. I have seen this specific type of anxiety portrayed as such a joke and shameful thing. And to hear Drew talk about health anxiety, to hear someone, for the first time in 7 years, talk about health anxiety and not in a joking way... it's something I had no idea I needed to hear until I heard it.. I still have anxiety, though not as much health anxiety anymore. But I just wanted to seriously say thank you. It gives me anxiety to comment on youtube videos, but this is important. To each of you, thank you for talking about feelings. Twelve year old me thanks you too. Edit: it also caught me off guard to hear panic attacks being talked about so.. openly. Thank you.
Same. The past few years I've had hypochondria, and hearing from Drew who is someone I admire and respect that when he has panic attacks they feel like heart attacks really helps. I'm always convinced I'm dying when I'm severely anxious, and OTHER people telling me, promising me that I'm not is really the only thing that helps me get out of it. Hearing him identify with the same feeling is comforting.
same!! went through it last year and its literally the scariest thing ever... its good to hear others talk about it, even tho i wouldnt wish this on anyone
Life long hypochondriac made worse by my dad suddenly passing a few years ago and this whole pandemic situation, I totally agree that you are made to feel so silly for being a hypochondriac in a way that you just don’t seem to for anything else. I’m currently on meds that are slowly helping me gain a bit more perspective on the health stuff but it’s still incredibly tough, by far the scariest kind of anxiety I’ve personally experienced and I want to give major props to anyone who has dealt with it/is dealing with it 💙
king UwU omg that’s so cool. I literally just started (3days ago lol) watching them and is frantically trying to watch all their videos before deletion! And boiii can I just say they are an InTeReStInG channel lol
The part about Drew doing whatever he wants to do is really great to me too. I'm not that interested in sitcoms, but his analytical videos were really fun to watch because you could tell he enjoyed researching it! Same goes with the console wars videos. If I had a YT channel, I would hope to make whatever content I was passionate about too!
Totally! And sometimes he's talking about a topic I know nothing about, so it feels like he's introducing it and now I'm aware of that topic through a nice source
Drew, At about 1:06:00 you are describing something called derealization. This is form of disassociation. I am diagnosed DPDR (depersonalization/ derealization) and know that feeling well. That being said, everyone can have moments of of disassociation/depersonalization/derealization... I am not diagnosing you. It’s caused by your mind trying to separate itself from reality during moments of acute anxiety. If you’ve ever heard of “Flight, fight, or freeze”... this is what causes the freeze. I hope this helps. Big fan. Keep up the good fight and thanks for helping normalize this stuff.
I recognised what Drew was describing at derealisation as well, because I follow another youtuber/musician called Dodie and she has DPDR. She's been really open about talking about her experiences with it and her attempts to find a treatment that works for her. It's so awesome that people like Dodie, Jordan, Jarvis and Drew are open about their feelings and mental issues.
Thank you sooooo much. This has been happening to me for years in a lot of places and situations that made me anxious and I didn’t know what it was exactly.
Hey Jarvis, I'm in tears. When you were talking about RSD, I related on a core level. My previous therapist considered that I have ADD. I'm more motivated now to ask my current therapist for testing. I want to thank you because I never knew about this, and it would explain so much about the way I carry myself and how I approach every social situation, past and present.
I'm now just watching their podcast since I got introduced to them by D'Angelo and I'm just--wow. I mean, I know of ADHD-centric channels that educates people but it honestly just feels so refreshing for them to casually discuss these subjects. Also, read Russel Barkley's work! His lectures are also on RUclips.
@@chicharon8171 that's so great! I got introduced to D'angelo through Jenna, Kurtis Conner's girlfriend on her insta story. I've followed Jarvis for a while and really enjoy his interactions with D'angelo and D'angelo's work. I will check out Russel Barkley for sure!
I just sent this to my boyfriend with a "!!!!!!!!". you guys are a big part of our relationship at present. we also luv drew. also thank you for being so open in your vivid descriptions of mental health struggles. feels so good to hear it
Have you seen his relationship podcast yet? It really helped me understand and come to terms with long distance in my plantonic relationships. ruclips.net/video/tN2puCZEbh8/видео.html
hearing Jarvis talk about his RSD made me feel SO much better about mine. as someone with ADHD and anxiety, the mix of those two cause RSD to majorly affect me and it’s nice to know im not alone in that regard
@Alanna Schroeder www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd/ bring this article up to them!!! this is the first place i ever learned about RSD w/r/t ADHD and it was honestly so life-changing. other than that, i'm not sure! but i think giving them a resource for it as well is a great point to start the conversation. wishing you good luck!!!
Jordan, it means sooo much that you’re talking about being med “dependent” so comfortably. I also have bipolar II and I’ll be on my meds probably my whole life. One of my self-destructive behaviors is going off meds because I feel stable, so normalizing medication use really helps me and I’m sure others too!
I agree, there's so much stigma around being 'dependent' on meds and Jordan being so open about it is great. I also really appreciate Jarvis' comparison to glasses. I need glasses to see so I will wear them all day everyday, for the rest of my life. If it's fine for me to be 'dependent' on glasses in that way, why should meds be different?
@@sianc7235 the comparison with glasses was so on point! One of my friends compares psych meds with blood pressure meds, too: it's silent and unassuming, but if you stop taking the medication the consequences are REAL because your body can't cope, and that's fine.
I have glasses I need to wear every day, and I take iron supplements for anemia! I also have depression, which my birth control helps. I don't think there's anything wrong with any of these things 💕 "You wouldn't go without glasses" makes such a great analogy I love that
This was exactly what I needed this evening, wow. Listening to people I look up to talk about SSRIs and CBT and panic attacks and depressive episodes is something I wish I had when I was first experiencing all of these things. It's really cool to have it now. Thank you for helping to destigmatize all these things and for talking about them in such a casual, realistic context.
54:33 My first major panic attack, I thought I was having a heart attack too. I had tunnel vision and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Luckily the people I was hanging out with had anxiety attacks before too so they knew what to do. Anxiety/general mental illness is a constant battle. It's ruthless. It requires so much self awareness, meta-cognition that we aren't taught. It's exhausting. For me, that looks like therapy (starting 6 years ago and still going), finding the right medication, and finding escape in video games. You're not alone. But sometimes that isn't enough. Anyone who has access/afford mental health services, PLEASE seek help. It's terrifying, there's still stigma, it's uncomfortable to address that there's something wrong. But it could save your life. It's so important because YOU'RE important. Thanks for coming to my mental health Ted talk
that happens to me a lot, i’ll just be minding my own business and all of the sudden i can’t catch my breath at all and my heart just starts beating rlly fast
I have had such a stressful day, but seeing this thumbnail and the video length, literally made me smile because I know tonight I'm going to have a few laughs. Thank you guys
i just want to say that, as someone who deals with mental health issues, it’s honestly really comforting hearing creators that i look up to talk about their own mental health struggles, it really helps to feel like i’m not useless or alone in feeling these things. thank you all for being so open and honest
Drew: We're gonna do a thing this weekend and when it finally comes I dread doing it all day until I actually go and it's alright. Me: *gasp* Are we... Are we ALL actually the same person?
it’s really interesting to hear about your experiences with ADHD, I was diagnosed VERY young and was on concerta until I graduated high school (11 years). a few years later now I’ve realized all the blocks in my life and difficulties with basic executive function and inability to complete the simplest tasks all track back to my ADHD, I just wasn’t able to recognize it as my symptoms evolved as I became an adult. it’s wild how incapacitating it can be paired with anxiety and depression.
Okay we know that drew and danny are just terrible disguises of one person, but can we talk about how it's so obvious that jarvis and Jordan are also the same person. It's literally unmistakable.
Lol I haven't necessarily had this thought before outright but literally every time I watch Jordan and Jarvis collab, I think about how much they remind me of each other; like they are cousins from different contitents or something. I would believe they are the same person way more than Drew and Danny. Like I always felt that was some absurd joke more than them actually being or looking alike.
Ok Jarvis. That issue you’ve had with watching Netflix by yourself and not being able to? I’ve been having the SAME problem and thought I was just losing it. (Still might be idk) I don’t know if it’s the anxiety or ADHD, but literally the only media I can sit through right now is RUclips and tiktok. I’m glad that you voiced it.
I’m the same way and have been for most of my life. For me this also includes music. If an artist I like releases new music, I won’t listen to it unless it’s in, like, a RUclips animatic. I genuinely can’t figure out why. But my suggestion for if you need to be multitasking while watching something, I suggest buying some tactile stuff like putty. It’s helped me a lot
The thing that Drew described that was not a panic attack was, in fact, dissociation (coming here from a big ol' psychology nerd and also a neurodivergent person w/ multiple mental health conditions lmao....). Dissociation can actually _be_ a part of panic attacks, and frequently is, but the physical symptoms in panic attacks are, as Drew described, p undeniable. :/ I super duper rly appreciate everybody's very very real and frank discussion of their mental healths this episode as a neurodivergent person. I have ADHD, OCD, BPD, and PTSD and I've experienced many of the things that all of ya'll have described, though I don't personally have Bipolar disorder, some of my mood swings and ups and downs have felt (or so I've heard from other folks I know with BP2, like Jordan) quite similar to hypomania at various times. RSD is a real deal T.T' anyway, just wanted to say thank you to all of you for being real and I hope that everybody can find what they need to keep going these days!!! sending love to all the sad boyz (genderneutral xD) out there
drew talking about his derealization and getting dreams confused with memories really hit home for me. that has been my biggest issue with anxiety lately, and just like you all were saying, i felt very alone in my experiences. so yeah thank you drew for talking about that.
Jordan talking about wanting to say, in a good way, "get over yourself" reminded me of something someone I love once told me when I was going through a particularly bad anxious episode. "Do you think you're so special that everything will crumble if you don't get it right? You're not that important, and that's a good thing." It seems counter-intuitive, but it one of the best things they could've told me and it's something I often remind myself when my mental health gets really bad. It's not all relying on you. You're not that special and that's a good thing.
i just: 1. remember that my actions don't really matter that much in the grand scheme of things because i am only one of 8 billion people living on this silly space rock, and 2. there is comedy to find in tragedy. most things can be seen as funny if you look at it from a certain angle
1:25:13 "More people should be aware of how much caffeine they're putting in their body even though it's like "Ah, I can't start my day without coffee!" well that's kind of a problem!" Oh my god I'm so glad Drew phrased it like that because it's so true and it made me laugh pretty hard
i’ve been known to say i “dont like anime” which kinda just implies i haven’t seen one that i like, but what it really means to me is “anime culture scared me so much and made me feel so invalidated and fetishized as a japanese person that i didn’t want anything to do with it and just said i didn’t like it rather than explaining to people how uncomfortable the idea of enjoying anime made me” obviously i sincerely doubt im the type of person ppl think of when they think of someone that says “i dont like anime” but idk i just felt like sharing
I think I’ve felt the rejection thing. The way I would discribe it is if “oh ok.” Was an emotion. My breath turns shallow, I’m trying to keep my eyes from welling, my entire body feels heavy, I feel as if I never want to speak ever again and the world feels like a brownish indigo.
seriously, if i perceive something as rejection, i suddenly just want to hide under the covers and never talk to anyone ever again. when i say that, people think it's an exaggeration but it's really not. it literally happens with the tiniest stuff but it all feels so dramatic and real granted, idk if my deal is rsd, bpd, or something else entirely but it SUCKS
The discussion about anxiety was so relatable. “Brain Propaganda” is a very fitting description. The hardest thing to explain to others is how exhausting it is to constantly fight against the current of your own thoughts. It feels like a full-time job, but to others it looks like you’re just sitting there. Edit: Feeling Good by David Burns really helped me too!
I'm a 29-year-old college dropout who probably should have gotten into tech as SOON as possible. And discovering this podcast that is hosted by two boyz that I feel like I relate to on such a deep level just based on their interests has been a huge saving grace for my mental health. Thanks so much for starting it up again! I've been listening to the old episodes and I'm almost caught up.
Gosh, being able to hear drew explain his anxiety and panic attacks is so relieving. I’ve thought almost the exact same way, worrying about my heart beating too fast or slow, my breathing not being right, my throat closing up, etc. it’s so nice to hear a RUclipsr that I’ve loved and respected for years tell me about his experience and having it be so close to mine. Thank you guys
I love this show. On getting evaluated a co worker (special ed teacher) and I were talking and I told her that I feel like I'm seeking drugs with my quest for a diagnosis since I feel like mediacation could help me. Her answer was so sobering. She said "Do you think that a diabetic person is a drug seeker because they need insulin? Your brain functions differently and sometimes medication can be helpful. You are entitled to care." I love hearing from other people who are getting/got their diagnosis as adults, since I'm nearly 25 at this point in life. I love this podcast, you are all so genuine and open about mental health and feelings. This is refreshing and I love this.
As a member of the ADHD/OCD gang I just gotta say that I really appreciate how open y’all are with talking about what you’ve been through, and it honestly means a lot to me 🥺🤙 Thx
awful combo. like how come i can't keep track of my own thought progression for more than a minute or two at best but then i literally can't get an intrusive thought out of my head no matter what? like omg brain pick a struggle
I love love love hearing about other people's panic attacks because 'hot take' but it makes mine feel more normal. I'd get really bad very self harmy panic attacks and the funniest/saddest part about it was as my family was trying to help me I kept repeating "I'm really sorry, this isn't your fault, please don't be upset" over and over. But what I learned since then, is that when people are trying to *help* you, it's unlikely they are thinking "wow they're doing this to get back at me" or "jeez they don't care about my feelings"
I just felt a genuine connection to drew. Every single thing he experienced with panic attacks and his over all health anxiety is exactly what im going through right now. Its terrifying
This episode makes me feel like a human being again and not a basket case. I listen to this whenever I'm in a dark space and it always helps. Thank you for being you fellas
I was just talking to my sister this afternoon about how I feel like in 100 years or something people will look back at our caffeine use the same way we look back at old times Coca Cola and like how often hard drugs were in “medicine”. Also just wanna say I love how y’all speak so openly and without judgement about your mental states and the things you’ve gone though/your journeys and all that. It’s really relatable and just so refreshing to listen to. Thank you so much for sharing this with all of us listeners/watchers. Also, a weird side effect of covidtimes (that I think you kinda mentioned) is that I’ll find myself watching a show, like criminal minds or something, and when they are in a bar or like a mall and all hugging and stuff I’m just like “ahh where’s their masks! Stay six feet apart!!” Such an odd brain re-wiring sort of thing lol.
Gainesville represent!! 🐊💖 Also Drew: the feeling of being in a dream or disconnected could possibly be Derealization/Depersonalization Disorder (DPDR), which is a kind of dissociation! I’ve dealt with DPDR for about eight years now, I went almost a year having no idea what was happening, but when I read about DPDR I felt so much relief. No idea if this is what you’re going through, but what you quickly described sounded familiar to my own experience and what a lot of others have been through. Thank you for this amazing episode. I gained a new respect for sports and runescape because of y’all, and I really appreciated hearing all of you be so open about your mental health. I love this podcast so much, can’t wait for more episodes! Thank you for doing what you’re doing!
jarvis it was so important to me that you mentioned rsd at all, thank you so much seriously. for a long time id react way too seriously and dramatically to tiny disagreements or when someone who not like something i shared with them etc. i have ADD/ADHD and i always just thought i was overdramatic and a sensitive wuss. as a guy especially it was such a point of insecurity and confusion because of toxic masculinity and especially as a trans man its hard but finding out about rsd makes me feel so much more understood. i literally used to go to the bathroom and cry then not talk to my friends the rest of the day just because they ignored me by accident at lunch.
i feel this . i cry every time I get overwhelmed and in a household of people who rarely express any emotion at all it just hurts so much cus i get overwhelmed at the smallest problems. my sister is very confrontational and doesn't understand how I process things - which i am not blaming her for but it sucks and it seems impossible to explain to someone who doesn't get me at all and just thinks I'm stupid and childish. i mean it's not my fault , i know it is my personal problem and something I need to control to not lash out I just wish she understood
Jarvis's ADHD and RSD, that example about the levels of caffiene, and shutting off in high school is so reminiscent of my own experience I lowkey teared up a little, the example I always give people is of one time someone said to me "oh could you turn down the music its distracting" and fully just didnt talk to any of my friends for a week because my brain was convinced that she and consequently all my other friends hated me
1:06:43 is an attitude that has been extremely helpful to me. I've had depression so bad I couldn't lift my arm to get out of bed. Since the age of 9. It became sort of helpful to "dismiss" the depression when I could. To stop identifying it with myself and basically say "My depression is lying to me. This isn't real." But then you could imagine how helpful that went over when I was trying to talk friends through chronic depression. Like, I was doing better. I'm telling them my sage advice on how I went from unable to lift my arm to more or less functional. It sounded to them like I was dismissing *them* or dismissing their pain. Ugh. I'm better helping my friends now but I wish I could do it in a way that was *more* helpful than just saying "There there"
I think I really needed this podcast. I get anxiety and panic attacks a lot and it actually ended a friendship as the friend was kinda toxic to me and whenever I'd talk about my anxiety or things I'd worry about... She kind of gaslit me about it, rather than just hearing me out... And I'm sure those with anxiety know dealing with that just really lays it on even more.
As someone who's had depression since age 9 and will likely be depressed for the rest of my life, this was nice to hear you guys taking about the glorification of mental illness.
when Drew described how his panic attacks used to be: like that depersonalization where your dreams become real memories and you're having an out-of-body experiences. That has been happening to me on a mild level since I was like 10/12 and I just assumed that is common and I've never associated it with a panic attack because I don't feel anxious when its happening, kind of calm and serene. Oftentimes, especially when my life is boring like now, I feel my dreams and those out-of-body experiences are more real to me than the rest of the time and thats why I love to remember my dreams in the morning and I love those out-of-body experiences.
drew talking about his panic attacks really made me feel better, esp bc i've experienced the gradual buildup of anxiety into a panic attack before but there was one time where i felt fine and then suddenly i couldnt breathe and i genuinely felt like i was going to die (i was in an ap exam, in hindsight was obvs the trigger) and i only realized later when i was telling my therapist abt it (this weird quirky thing happened to me!) she like........thats a panic attack and i was like 'oh' adn before my last surgery i had another panic attack that was entirely different from ones i've had before where i felt just a lil worried and then suddenly i was crying and i couldnt stop crying and i couldnt tell them why i was crying either, i just /was/ so i think its important for people with anxiety (or just people in general) to understand that panic attacks look different, and one person can have different kinds of panic attacks too
Drew, I have found caffeine and even sugar and other stimulants to be huge triggers for my anxiety and could induce panic attacks. My body confuses the physiological effects of caffeine (esp increased heart rate) as severe anxiety, even when I objectively know I am not anxious. Made the mistake of getting a cold brew in college, I thought I was going to die. It felt like cardiac arrest. I have also tried edibles in hopes that they would help my anxiety, however I had the same issues as I do with caffeine, but with added psychotropic effects. I found that it would make me feel super agitated and too stimulating. I’m glad to hear that you had similar experiences with weed triggering your anxiety.
Jordan's definitive response to being on medication for the rest of his life was super comforting bc I always wanna just play expert mode and try to go without my meds and it just never works out. I listened to that part of the video 3 times.
RSD is such a huge part of having ADHD that not enough people talk about. And it's SO MUCH MORE than just being overly upset about rejection. It insidiously seeps into so many other aspects of life. The biggest impact it can have also is an above average sensitivity to FOMO. I will buy things I don't need because they're "limited edition" and I don't want to miss out. I used to actively avoid seeking a romatic partner, even though I wanted one due to a feeling that it would make me "locked into" the relationship and I couldn't flirt as much. There's also another weird dimension of it where the "rejection" side of it can also manifest in the form of not wanting to concede in an argument, or compromise on an opinion. It's this weird thing where it's like "I can see where the other person is coming from, but I would find myself weak and pathetic if I backed down and admitted I was wrong in my understanding". It's this bizzare fixation with wanting to be RIGHT more than being a good person. The satisfaction of "winning" an argument is second to none, and I find myself chasing that high no matter how many bridges I burn WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY having an intense desire to be liked and not rejected. It's this awful double threat of "I'm gonna take hard opinionated stances, argue a lot because I value sticking to my convictions, but also, your not allowed to dislike me when I do that. Everyone MUST like me 100% of the time or I'm gonna have a meltdown and depressive spiral"
55:00 I had the same thing a couple of years ago. I was just watching Netflix on my sofa and suddenly it struck me. My first though was, "How the hell am I having a heart attack as a 20yo?". The pain ended up coming and going in waves over 5h, and I ended up in the ER and spending the night at the hospital. It's to date the worst thing I've experienced. I was actually thinking that was going to die.
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.... there is a finally a word for what I feel. I truly believed all my friends hate me cause they wouldn't text me every day.
i used to have exactly those dissociative episodes drew describes at 1:06:00 . my therapist told me that they were indeed panic attacks. everyone is different but i hope that if you experience them as well, then this helps you define how you’re feeling
What drew is feeling at 1:06:00 is dereality. A feeling like a dream state or that things aren't real. Its related to dissociation! I get dereality episodes a lot and I've never seen someone else go thru them so it was cool to be like: hey!! Same!! I guess me and drew are.. the same person now???
Sorry about your panic attacks, Drew :( I was fortunate enough to only have experienced panic disorder for a year, but it's still awful... I was paranoid every single day, refused to eat and thought I was dying. As a result, I had to move schools due to my newly developed agoraphobia for a fresh start and it was the darkest time in my life. Eventually, the attacks lessened and one day it stopped completely. I of course had to force myself into normality in order to heal. This was not easy at all, but I conquered my panic in the end after many tears and suicidal thoughts. It's terrifying and I hope it gets better❤️
Thank you so much for being open about your panic attacks Drew and thank you for this conversation Sad Boyz. I have had a couple bad panic attacks (even in the middle of a work meeting) and they are beyond scary and it’s overwhelming.
This podcast is really necessary. As a person struggling with severe anxiety, depression and panic attacks for almost my whole life I can say: therapy and medicines are very important for living, as find a hobby or something to occupy your mind. Shoutout to the sad boyz!
I’ve seen some conversation about medication dependence and I thought I’d share something a therapist taught me when I felt disappointed about being on meds long term: Let’s use Serotonin/depression and anxiety as an example. People with depression have a deficit in the production of serotonin in their brain. Now diabetics, they have a deficit in the production of insulin in their pancreas. Both the brain and pancreas are organs. You wouldn’t tell someone with diabetes to get off insulin, or get over it, so why would you with a mental illness?
It's legitimately so refreshing to see content creators that I love talking openly and respectfully about deep facets of mental health. Having the jokes mixed in there but also giving each other the space to be vulnerable genuinely makes me feel like I am listening to my own friends talking to me about mental health. thank you to the boyz for this one
Omg Jarvis! 1:36:00 was something I've never heard someone else describe so well, it literally stresses me out to try and watch TV alone without doing something else at the same time. Its why I love podcasts, very easy way to add stimulus to an understimulating task/activity
Loved this episode so much, I've been in a loop of pushing away responsibilities, feeling bad about it, then pushing away that feeling of guilt by occupying my mind with entertainment. I've just been procrastinating and doing virtually nothing productive, but oddly enough listening to this gave me the drive to try harder:)
It's really good to see an example of positive interactions between men. It seems like a lot of men really struggle with empathy and having friends, which can lead to some bad stuff
As someone who got diagnosed late in life with ADHD, struggled finding the right meds, then got diagnosed with bipolar, I am so grateful that yall are having this conversation. I feel so seen after hearing Jordan's experience and it makes me less self conscious! Much appreciation to yall, and thank you for the frank discussion of mental health
I really appreciate Drew talking about his anxiety, it's so relatable. I've always had anxiety but I have a true panic attack this past year and I thought I was about to have a seizure. It was a feeling I hadn't experienced before and I totally understand where he's coming from when he talks about going to the ER.
this episode is one of the best things I have ever seen. I have had diagnosed ADHD for twelve years yet no one ever brought up RSD or depersonalisation. hearing people I admire so much sharing their struggles with issues I recognize is invaluable. knowing that people I look up to got where they are with the same problems I face is so inspiring
This is so refreshing! As a late diagnosed ADHD myself, I love hearing Jarvis talk about his experiences. I know now that my intense coffee consumption was a coping strategy, and concerta changed my life. It’s hard that you have to function while you’re finding strategies and medicines that help, because the side effects can really make that difficult. Thanks for normalizing normal experiences!
The thing Drew described about dreams feeling like reality and the feeling of zooming put of your body, I experienced that often as a child. Dreams and tvs shows sometimes felt real and I felt like I wasnt in my body or that I waa viewing it from the outside and I would have existential crises. The weird thing is, I didnt think it was wierd as a kid. Like, I somehow understood that life and the human experience was complicated enough that it was okay to have moments like that
This is your best podcast yet!! I love all three of oh so much and your dynamic together is so fun to listen to. Y’all also had such an important and interesting conversation, as a person with very severe mental health issues it’s always nice to learn that the creative people you look up to struggle just like you do. Love y’all, also settled is the bomb!!
fun hearing about what jarvis plays to go to sleep because i sometimes find one of drew's longer videos and use that in the background when my thoughts get too loud and i start feeling dread and panic lol
Hey so I'm like 3 days late but literally Jarvis talking about ADHD like,,, helped me so much, just the mundane example of RSD literally i heard that and just went,,, wait but that's literally my whole life. I've been thinking I have ADHD for a while now? And quarantine made me think it even more, but I've been really hesitant to really do anythimg about it because,,, it seems really difficult and I "can cope." Also because I don't wanna look like I just want to be different or something, but yeah I don't really have a coherent train of thought to put in this comment, and this has taken me 10 minutes to type, but just thanks for talking about that cause it really helped to hear that specific part and just the whole mental health part of the podcast.
I was diagnosed with ADHD about a year and a half ago at 20 and this episode has been incredibly relatable to all my experiences. Thank u so much for being so open and making this world seem a little less impossible to function in
thank you so much for this. i really needed that mental health talk. i’m super sure i have adhd but i have been so anxious to talk to my counselor and also super lazy bc i’m really depressed rn so this gave me the motivation and validation to go to someone who can do something and finding help. thank you❤️❤️❤️❤️
i struggle almost everyday with dissociation, which is what drew described. it felt good to have it validated (which was the the whole point of the segment lol)
It’s so refreshing to hear how much my experience is similar to Jordan. I had incredibly severe ADHD that I was diagnosed with just last summer after I turned 19. It turned into severe depression and anxiety down the road. I also have type 1 diabetes, and my lack of motivation to control my blood sugars made me stay in a constant state of hyperglycaemia, meaning worse brain fog, numbed emotions and no empathy for others which made it impossible to feel connections, worsening depression and a greater sense of loneliness, constant physical symptoms I didn’t care to understand, and an inability to even think that much was wrong. I was drinking alcohol all the time (illegally, don’t tell anyone) for that rush of dopamine and norepinephrine that my body was missing. After starting Dexedrine, like Jordan said, I finally felt like a real person. There was a lot of adjustments, I’d crash and have depressive episodes, so I was bumped up to a pretty high long-acting dose. I had a very similar extreme panic attack to Drew that got me in the ER. I was “sitting” in the waiting room, hitting my head and jerking my body and standing up and sitting down and rocking back and forth bc I believed that if I stopped moving, I’d faint and slip into a coma. I was called a hypochondriac by my doctor and constantly felt gaslit by her. I felt like everyone thought I was a lunatic and it really got to me. After cutting down on my caffeine (that I was still ODing on), taking better care of my diabetes, eating healthier, etc, I finally feel like a normal human. I can adequately listen to my body now and always am working on how to find solutions for spikes or drops. I actually wanna start studying psychiatry and neuroscience, I have a fascination with empathy after lacking it literally my whole life up until I starting taking Dexedrine, and feeling empathy and connections and really feeling peoples’ emotions is one of the greatest feelings ever. I crave that feeling all the time, and it’s really opened my eyes to the world around me and strengthened my bond with my friends and my dad. Whenever I get general anxiety now, or feel crazy, I think of how much better it feels to feel too much than to feel nothing at all, and that’s
I fall asleep listening to RUclips (for the anxiety LMAO) and woke up towards the end of this. What I heard was so relatable it was genuinely absurd. My boyfriend is always baffled by how I need to be doing three things at once constantly, and now he gets concerned when I’m NOT listening to something. I’ve also been self-medicating the worst of my anxiety with alcohol whenever I set aside the money to get it for months now and have always been a social drinker. I also only watch RUclips, not movies or tv, because feeling like I need to be genuinely paying attention to one thing is stressful. This made me consider trying anxiety medication (or probably cbd, at least for now, because I’m too anxious to go to the doctor’s) more seriously. I’ll have to come back and listen to the rest of it later.
I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to listen to three young guys talk very openly about panic attacks and mental health. Thank you, all. 💜
i hope you find your foot
@@alicerose638 Still looking...I'll let you know if it pops up 😉
@@FootlessJo so? Have you found it?
It is, I grew up with very bad anxiety, but I never had a panic attack until I was 16. I’ve experienced uncontrollable twitches, sweating, and shakes, but nothing prepared me for the panic attack. You really feel like you’re having a heart attack-
Hey jo. What you doing here? Internet worlds colliding. 💜
Therapist here: panic and anxiety are REAL, PHYSICAL conditions. The ER wasn't super helpful because the CAUSE was psychological rather than physical, not because the physical experience wasn't very, very REAL. Anytime people minimize what they're going through by saying "it's all in my head," I remind them that literally everything is in your head; that's how we experience the world, through our minds and perspectives. Your experiences are real.
Thank you for this comment 🙌🏻
Haha, I know it’s “all in my head,” that’s the problem. Instead of minimizing my anxious meltdown, let’s try to work together to curb my anxiety so I don’t end up vomiting in the middle of my Communications lecture again.
For some reason, I can’t summon those words when I really need them. But it’s nice to know that there’s a physiological explanation for these episodes even if it’s triggered by a psychological state instead of an infection.
Thank you for this comment, it is very helpful for me being both a sufferer of anxiety and a future therapist!
Wow, thank you
Screenshotting this to keep it with me forever. This is so important to remember. This is the best way I've ever seen it said, too. Thank you.
yall really said "lets talk about sports and anxiety for 2 hours" and i listened ✨
And runescape
Edit: this is misinformation runescape is a sport I’ll make sure to do more research next time
@@AirLight1646 implying that runescape is not a sport
ian-us annus you’re right my bad
ian-us annus Unus
@@AirLight1646 annus
Drew’s blue eyeshadow looks fantastic.
It does we need a makeup tutorial
I know, I love it!
Who?
danny’s*
Georgia Overdrive the guy thats not Jarvis or Jordan
When I was 12 I was a severe hypochondriac, and I convinced myself I had cancer, a stroke, a brain tumor, and heart disease. I thought I was going to die at every moment, and I wanted to. I have seen this specific type of anxiety portrayed as such a joke and shameful thing. And to hear Drew talk about health anxiety, to hear someone, for the first time in 7 years, talk about health anxiety and not in a joking way... it's something I had no idea I needed to hear until I heard it.. I still have anxiety, though not as much health anxiety anymore. But I just wanted to seriously say thank you. It gives me anxiety to comment on youtube videos, but this is important. To each of you, thank you for talking about feelings. Twelve year old me thanks you too.
Edit: it also caught me off guard to hear panic attacks being talked about so.. openly. Thank you.
Same. The past few years I've had hypochondria, and hearing from Drew who is someone I admire and respect that when he has panic attacks they feel like heart attacks really helps. I'm always convinced I'm dying when I'm severely anxious, and OTHER people telling me, promising me that I'm not is really the only thing that helps me get out of it. Hearing him identify with the same feeling is comforting.
I have what they call "hypochondriac anxiety disorder". It fucking sucks.
same!! went through it last year and its literally the scariest thing ever... its good to hear others talk about it, even tho i wouldnt wish this on anyone
Same! Mine is connected to medical trauma and it's so hard to explain to people without feeling embarrassed
Life long hypochondriac made worse by my dad suddenly passing a few years ago and this whole pandemic situation, I totally agree that you are made to feel so silly for being a hypochondriac in a way that you just don’t seem to for anything else. I’m currently on meds that are slowly helping me gain a bit more perspective on the health stuff but it’s still incredibly tough, by far the scariest kind of anxiety I’ve personally experienced and I want to give major props to anyone who has dealt with it/is dealing with it 💙
who is gooden and when did you draw him
Gee dang!
i love your pfp my guy :)
king UwU dude is your pfp related to unus Annus?
Alice Z you know it bb :)
king UwU omg that’s so cool. I literally just started (3days ago lol) watching them and is frantically trying to watch all their videos before deletion! And boiii can I just say they are an InTeReStInG channel lol
I guess Drew didn't get the cool 'stache memo. That's ok, we forgive him.
Sad
you... you mean Danny right??? is this some sort of we are the same person joke where you say drew instead of danny? I'm confused.
@@classicconundrum omg facts!! I don't even think Drew exists, it's just Danny's second channel tbh
But the eyeshadow makes up for it though.
MissDraiha boyz
The part about Drew doing whatever he wants to do is really great to me too. I'm not that interested in sitcoms, but his analytical videos were really fun to watch because you could tell he enjoyed researching it! Same goes with the console wars videos. If I had a YT channel, I would hope to make whatever content I was passionate about too!
Yeah 100%! I have no interest in games but I love his gaming videos, I think Drew's at his best when he's talking about the stuff he loves.
Totally! And sometimes he's talking about a topic I know nothing about, so it feels like he's introducing it and now I'm aware of that topic through a nice source
Drew's video essays are the best thing on his channel omg i thought i was in the minority
Drew,
At about 1:06:00 you are describing something called derealization. This is form of disassociation. I am diagnosed DPDR (depersonalization/ derealization) and know that feeling well.
That being said, everyone can have moments of of disassociation/depersonalization/derealization... I am not diagnosing you. It’s caused by your mind trying to separate itself from reality during moments of acute anxiety.
If you’ve ever heard of “Flight, fight, or freeze”... this is what causes the freeze.
I hope this helps. Big fan. Keep up the good fight and thanks for helping normalize this stuff.
I recognised what Drew was describing at derealisation as well, because I follow another youtuber/musician called Dodie and she has DPDR. She's been really open about talking about her experiences with it and her attempts to find a treatment that works for her. It's so awesome that people like Dodie, Jordan, Jarvis and Drew are open about their feelings and mental issues.
Yes! It feels so hard to explain or describe to people and even to myself
I was just about to comment this, I have DPDR too
oh! i was searching for a comment like this, thank u very much! :)
Thank you sooooo much. This has been happening to me for years in a lot of places and situations that made me anxious and I didn’t know what it was exactly.
Hey Jarvis, I'm in tears. When you were talking about RSD, I related on a core level. My previous therapist considered that I have ADD. I'm more motivated now to ask my current therapist for testing. I want to thank you because I never knew about this, and it would explain so much about the way I carry myself and how I approach every social situation, past and present.
Have you ever seen the channel HowToAdhd? She has a video talking about how to manage RSD!
@@saggguy7 I will check that out! Thanks for the resource, I wasn't aware of it til now!
I'm now just watching their podcast since I got introduced to them by D'Angelo and I'm just--wow. I mean, I know of ADHD-centric channels that educates people but it honestly just feels so refreshing for them to casually discuss these subjects. Also, read Russel Barkley's work! His lectures are also on RUclips.
@@chicharon8171 that's so great! I got introduced to D'angelo through Jenna, Kurtis Conner's girlfriend on her insta story. I've followed Jarvis for a while and really enjoy his interactions with D'angelo and D'angelo's work. I will check out Russel Barkley for sure!
I just sent this to my boyfriend with a "!!!!!!!!". you guys are a big part of our relationship at present. we also luv drew. also thank you for being so open in your vivid descriptions of mental health struggles. feels so good to hear it
Same here! I really appreciate and value masculine people being emotionally vulnerable!
Have you seen his relationship podcast yet? It really helped me understand and come to terms with long distance in my plantonic relationships.
ruclips.net/video/tN2puCZEbh8/видео.html
it’s been years r yall still together I wanna know
@@11037_dr same! I wanna know too!!
@@11037_dr youll never know
I came for the runescape and stayed for the depression
even out of context, this is very relatable
I came for the depression and stayed for the runescape
HDJDHJDJA same
I didn't come for both and i stayed for both plus 5 other reasons
hearing Jarvis talk about his RSD made me feel SO much better about mine. as someone with ADHD and anxiety, the mix of those two cause RSD to majorly affect me and it’s nice to know im not alone in that regard
RSD is one of the WORST parts of being neurodivergent 😭 you are most definitely not alone
honestly, it was so good
@Alanna Schroeder www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd/ bring this article up to them!!! this is the first place i ever learned about RSD w/r/t ADHD and it was honestly so life-changing. other than that, i'm not sure! but i think giving them a resource for it as well is a great point to start the conversation. wishing you good luck!!!
@Alanna Schroeder
Jordan, it means sooo much that you’re talking about being med “dependent” so comfortably. I also have bipolar II and I’ll be on my meds probably my whole life.
One of my self-destructive behaviors is going off meds because I feel stable, so normalizing medication use really helps me and I’m sure others too!
Same, I stopped taking my OCD meds a few months ago for some reason and without them I've been spiraling out of control...
I agree, there's so much stigma around being 'dependent' on meds and Jordan being so open about it is great. I also really appreciate Jarvis' comparison to glasses. I need glasses to see so I will wear them all day everyday, for the rest of my life. If it's fine for me to be 'dependent' on glasses in that way, why should meds be different?
@@sianc7235 the comparison with glasses was so on point! One of my friends compares psych meds with blood pressure meds, too: it's silent and unassuming, but if you stop taking the medication the consequences are REAL because your body can't cope, and that's fine.
I have glasses I need to wear every day, and I take iron supplements for anemia! I also have depression, which my birth control helps. I don't think there's anything wrong with any of these things 💕
"You wouldn't go without glasses" makes such a great analogy I love that
Preach! I will be dependent on meds my entire life too probably. Nice to know I'm in good company
This was exactly what I needed this evening, wow. Listening to people I look up to talk about SSRIs and CBT and panic attacks and depressive episodes is something I wish I had when I was first experiencing all of these things. It's really cool to have it now. Thank you for helping to destigmatize all these things and for talking about them in such a casual, realistic context.
54:33 My first major panic attack, I thought I was having a heart attack too. I had tunnel vision and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Luckily the people I was hanging out with had anxiety attacks before too so they knew what to do. Anxiety/general mental illness is a constant battle. It's ruthless. It requires so much self awareness, meta-cognition that we aren't taught. It's exhausting. For me, that looks like therapy (starting 6 years ago and still going), finding the right medication, and finding escape in video games. You're not alone. But sometimes that isn't enough. Anyone who has access/afford mental health services, PLEASE seek help. It's terrifying, there's still stigma, it's uncomfortable to address that there's something wrong. But it could save your life. It's so important because YOU'RE important. Thanks for coming to my mental health Ted talk
Thank you sooo much. Thats what i was looking for.
that happens to me a lot, i’ll just be minding my own business and all of the sudden i can’t catch my breath at all and my heart just starts beating rlly fast
Realizing that Drew, Danny, Jarvis, Kurtis, Gus, Eddy, Abelina Sabrina all exist in the same cinematic universe... 🤯
And Cody 💥💥💥
you said Danny twice
@@dragonispurple6075 they said danny eight times
you mean..... the universe?
Ikrr
I have had such a stressful day, but seeing this thumbnail and the video length, literally made me smile because I know tonight I'm going to have a few laughs. Thank you guys
hope tomorrow will be a better day for you both!
i just want to say that, as someone who deals with mental health issues, it’s honestly really comforting hearing creators that i look up to talk about their own mental health struggles, it really helps to feel like i’m not useless or alone in feeling these things. thank you all for being so open and honest
I'm loving that eyeshadow! I can't wait until Drew drops his first palette!
Sephora x Drew Gooden present the Lil Stinker pallete.
In the deep. In the deep. In the deep.
IN THE DEEP IN THE DEEP
i was the 69th like and i’m very proud
@@sherbet_the_destroyer nice
@Uel K2 yup
adele would be rolling in it
y’all in the deep more than adele 😭😭
Drew: We're gonna do a thing this weekend and when it finally comes I dread doing it all day until I actually go and it's alright.
Me: *gasp* Are we... Are we ALL actually the same person?
he is drew and we are drew
and we are the same person
it’s really interesting to hear about your experiences with ADHD, I was diagnosed VERY young and was on concerta until I graduated high school (11 years). a few years later now I’ve realized all the blocks in my life and difficulties with basic executive function and inability to complete the simplest tasks all track back to my ADHD, I just wasn’t able to recognize it as my symptoms evolved as I became an adult. it’s wild how incapacitating it can be paired with anxiety and depression.
My ADHD is mostly manageable when I’m doing well otherwise, but when I’m depressed it can be so debilitating. I feel you
Okay we know that drew and danny are just terrible disguises of one person, but can we talk about how it's so obvious that jarvis and Jordan are also the same person. It's literally unmistakable.
Lol I haven't necessarily had this thought before outright but literally every time I watch Jordan and Jarvis collab, I think about how much they remind me of each other; like they are cousins from different contitents or something. I would believe they are the same person way more than Drew and Danny. Like I always felt that was some absurd joke more than them actually being or looking alike.
They should have had all four of them and called it the Jardan and Dranny podcast
Ok Jarvis. That issue you’ve had with watching Netflix by yourself and not being able to? I’ve been having the SAME problem and thought I was just losing it. (Still might be idk) I don’t know if it’s the anxiety or ADHD, but literally the only media I can sit through right now is RUclips and tiktok. I’m glad that you voiced it.
I’m the same way and have been for most of my life. For me this also includes music. If an artist I like releases new music, I won’t listen to it unless it’s in, like, a RUclips animatic. I genuinely can’t figure out why. But my suggestion for if you need to be multitasking while watching something, I suggest buying some tactile stuff like putty. It’s helped me a lot
God, this episode is just too good. The amount of meaty good mental health conversation...brings tear to my eye, because same.
The thing that Drew described that was not a panic attack was, in fact, dissociation (coming here from a big ol' psychology nerd and also a neurodivergent person w/ multiple mental health conditions lmao....). Dissociation can actually _be_ a part of panic attacks, and frequently is, but the physical symptoms in panic attacks are, as Drew described, p undeniable. :/ I super duper rly appreciate everybody's very very real and frank discussion of their mental healths this episode as a neurodivergent person. I have ADHD, OCD, BPD, and PTSD and I've experienced many of the things that all of ya'll have described, though I don't personally have Bipolar disorder, some of my mood swings and ups and downs have felt (or so I've heard from other folks I know with BP2, like Jordan) quite similar to hypomania at various times. RSD is a real deal T.T' anyway, just wanted to say thank you to all of you for being real and I hope that everybody can find what they need to keep going these days!!! sending love to all the sad boyz (genderneutral xD) out there
drew talking about his derealization and getting dreams confused with memories really hit home for me. that has been my biggest issue with anxiety lately, and just like you all were saying, i felt very alone in my experiences. so yeah thank you drew for talking about that.
Drew gooden
Yes
I agree
Drew gooden
Drew gooden
Correct
Jordan talking about wanting to say, in a good way, "get over yourself" reminded me of something someone I love once told me when I was going through a particularly bad anxious episode. "Do you think you're so special that everything will crumble if you don't get it right? You're not that important, and that's a good thing." It seems counter-intuitive, but it one of the best things they could've told me and it's something I often remind myself when my mental health gets really bad. It's not all relying on you. You're not that special and that's a good thing.
Nihilism can definitely be helpful but eventually I've learned more to absurdism: the idea that life sucks and that's funny
i just:
1. remember that my actions don't really matter that much in the grand scheme of things because i am only one of 8 billion people living on this silly space rock, and
2. there is comedy to find in tragedy. most things can be seen as funny if you look at it from a certain angle
1:25:13 "More people should be aware of how much caffeine they're putting in their body even though it's like "Ah, I can't start my day without coffee!" well that's kind of a problem!" Oh my god I'm so glad Drew phrased it like that because it's so true and it made me laugh pretty hard
i’ve been known to say i “dont like anime” which kinda just implies i haven’t seen one that i like, but what it really means to me is “anime culture scared me so much and made me feel so invalidated and fetishized as a japanese person that i didn’t want anything to do with it and just said i didn’t like it rather than explaining to people how uncomfortable the idea of enjoying anime made me”
obviously i sincerely doubt im the type of person ppl think of when they think of someone that says “i dont like anime” but idk i just felt like sharing
A lot of anime makes me uncomfortable as well, and I'm not even from Japan
I think I’ve felt the rejection thing. The way I would discribe it is if “oh ok.” Was an emotion. My breath turns shallow, I’m trying to keep my eyes from welling, my entire body feels heavy, I feel as if I never want to speak ever again and the world feels like a brownish indigo.
seriously, if i perceive something as rejection, i suddenly just want to hide under the covers and never talk to anyone ever again. when i say that, people think it's an exaggeration but it's really not. it literally happens with the tiniest stuff but it all feels so dramatic and real
granted, idk if my deal is rsd, bpd, or something else entirely but it SUCKS
The discussion about anxiety was so relatable. “Brain Propaganda” is a very fitting description. The hardest thing to explain to others is how exhausting it is to constantly fight against the current of your own thoughts. It feels like a full-time job, but to others it looks like you’re just sitting there.
Edit: Feeling Good by David Burns really helped me too!
I'm a 29-year-old college dropout who probably should have gotten into tech as SOON as possible. And discovering this podcast that is hosted by two boyz that I feel like I relate to on such a deep level just based on their interests has been a huge saving grace for my mental health. Thanks so much for starting it up again! I've been listening to the old episodes and I'm almost caught up.
Ngl when Drew said it was hot, I thought the twist was going to be that he was in Florida.
(also hope all of y'all are doing better this year)
Gosh, being able to hear drew explain his anxiety and panic attacks is so relieving. I’ve thought almost the exact same way, worrying about my heart beating too fast or slow, my breathing not being right, my throat closing up, etc. it’s so nice to hear a RUclipsr that I’ve loved and respected for years tell me about his experience and having it be so close to mine. Thank you guys
I love this show. On getting evaluated a co worker (special ed teacher) and I were talking and I told her that I feel like I'm seeking drugs with my quest for a diagnosis since I feel like mediacation could help me. Her answer was so sobering. She said "Do you think that a diabetic person is a drug seeker because they need insulin? Your brain functions differently and sometimes medication can be helpful. You are entitled to care."
I love hearing from other people who are getting/got their diagnosis as adults, since I'm nearly 25 at this point in life.
I love this podcast, you are all so genuine and open about mental health and feelings. This is refreshing and I love this.
As a member of the ADHD/OCD gang I just gotta say that I really appreciate how open y’all are with talking about what you’ve been through, and it honestly means a lot to me 🥺🤙
Thx
OCD gang here for you 🥺
What time stamps do they talk about this stuff??? Please does anyone onow
awful combo. like how come i can't keep track of my own thought progression for more than a minute or two at best but then i literally can't get an intrusive thought out of my head no matter what? like omg brain pick a struggle
I love love love hearing about other people's panic attacks because 'hot take' but it makes mine feel more normal. I'd get really bad very self harmy panic attacks and the funniest/saddest part about it was as my family was trying to help me I kept repeating "I'm really sorry, this isn't your fault, please don't be upset" over and over. But what I learned since then, is that when people are trying to *help* you, it's unlikely they are thinking "wow they're doing this to get back at me" or "jeez they don't care about my feelings"
I just felt a genuine connection to drew. Every single thing he experienced with panic attacks and his over all health anxiety is exactly what im going through right now. Its terrifying
This episode makes me feel like a human being again and not a basket case. I listen to this whenever I'm in a dark space and it always helps. Thank you for being you fellas
I was just talking to my sister this afternoon about how I feel like in 100 years or something people will look back at our caffeine use the same way we look back at old times Coca Cola and like how often hard drugs were in “medicine”.
Also just wanna say I love how y’all speak so openly and without judgement about your mental states and the things you’ve gone though/your journeys and all that. It’s really relatable and just so refreshing to listen to. Thank you so much for sharing this with all of us listeners/watchers.
Also, a weird side effect of covidtimes (that I think you kinda mentioned) is that I’ll find myself watching a show, like criminal minds or something, and when they are in a bar or like a mall and all hugging and stuff I’m just like “ahh where’s their masks! Stay six feet apart!!” Such an odd brain re-wiring sort of thing lol.
Mae McBride omg same, every movie and show I am nervous when people are standing too close or going into a crowd
Gainesville represent!! 🐊💖
Also Drew: the feeling of being in a dream or disconnected could possibly be Derealization/Depersonalization Disorder (DPDR), which is a kind of dissociation! I’ve dealt with DPDR for about eight years now, I went almost a year having no idea what was happening, but when I read about DPDR I felt so much relief. No idea if this is what you’re going through, but what you quickly described sounded familiar to my own experience and what a lot of others have been through.
Thank you for this amazing episode. I gained a new respect for sports and runescape because of y’all, and I really appreciated hearing all of you be so open about your mental health. I love this podcast so much, can’t wait for more episodes! Thank you for doing what you’re doing!
I was thinking the same thing! Even if it’s not DPDR as a full-blown disorder, it definitely sounds at least acute dissociation
Hello fellow Gainesvillian
I’m so glad that they got Amanda’s husband on the podcast
jarvis it was so important to me that you mentioned rsd at all, thank you so much seriously. for a long time id react way too seriously and dramatically to tiny disagreements or when someone who not like something i shared with them etc. i have ADD/ADHD and i always just thought i was overdramatic and a sensitive wuss. as a guy especially it was such a point of insecurity and confusion because of toxic masculinity and especially as a trans man its hard but finding out about rsd makes me feel so much more understood. i literally used to go to the bathroom and cry then not talk to my friends the rest of the day just because they ignored me by accident at lunch.
oh hey, another trans sibling with ADHD ❤️
i feel this . i cry every time I get overwhelmed and in a household of people who rarely express any emotion at all it just hurts so much cus i get overwhelmed at the smallest problems. my sister is very confrontational and doesn't understand how I process things - which i am not blaming her for but it sucks and it seems impossible to explain to someone who doesn't get me at all and just thinks I'm stupid and childish. i mean it's not my fault , i know it is my personal problem and something I need to control to not lash out I just wish she understood
Jarvis's ADHD and RSD, that example about the levels of caffiene, and shutting off in high school is so reminiscent of my own experience I lowkey teared up a little, the example I always give people is of one time someone said to me "oh could you turn down the music its distracting" and fully just didnt talk to any of my friends for a week because my brain was convinced that she and consequently all my other friends hated me
Wow you got Danny on a video again
I love part 2’s but isn’t this Cody ko?
Oh yeah it’s Danny
1:06:43 is an attitude that has been extremely helpful to me. I've had depression so bad I couldn't lift my arm to get out of bed. Since the age of 9. It became sort of helpful to "dismiss" the depression when I could. To stop identifying it with myself and basically say "My depression is lying to me. This isn't real."
But then you could imagine how helpful that went over when I was trying to talk friends through chronic depression. Like, I was doing better. I'm telling them my sage advice on how I went from unable to lift my arm to more or less functional. It sounded to them like I was dismissing *them* or dismissing their pain.
Ugh. I'm better helping my friends now but I wish I could do it in a way that was *more* helpful than just saying "There there"
Maybe I understood what he was saying wrong. But identifying with the depression too much was definitely a problem for me.
I think I really needed this podcast. I get anxiety and panic attacks a lot and it actually ended a friendship as the friend was kinda toxic to me and whenever I'd talk about my anxiety or things I'd worry about... She kind of gaslit me about it, rather than just hearing me out... And I'm sure those with anxiety know dealing with that just really lays it on even more.
As someone who's had depression since age 9 and will likely be depressed for the rest of my life, this was nice to hear you guys taking about the glorification of mental illness.
when Drew described how his panic attacks used to be: like that depersonalization where your dreams become real memories and you're having an out-of-body experiences. That has been happening to me on a mild level since I was like 10/12 and I just assumed that is common and I've never associated it with a panic attack because I don't feel anxious when its happening, kind of calm and serene. Oftentimes, especially when my life is boring like now, I feel my dreams and those out-of-body experiences are more real to me than the rest of the time and thats why I love to remember my dreams in the morning and I love those out-of-body experiences.
I've always loved having this too lol its weirdly reassuring
drew talking about his panic attacks really made me feel better, esp bc i've experienced the gradual buildup of anxiety into a panic attack before but there was one time where i felt fine and then suddenly i couldnt breathe and i genuinely felt like i was going to die (i was in an ap exam, in hindsight was obvs the trigger) and i only realized later when i was telling my therapist abt it (this weird quirky thing happened to me!) she like........thats a panic attack and i was like 'oh' adn before my last surgery i had another panic attack that was entirely different from ones i've had before where i felt just a lil worried and then suddenly i was crying and i couldnt stop crying and i couldnt tell them why i was crying either, i just /was/ so i think its important for people with anxiety (or just people in general) to understand that panic attacks look different, and one person can have different kinds of panic attacks too
Yo wait wtf why am I just finding out about this podcast?? I’ve been SLEEPIN on this
Drew, I have found caffeine and even sugar and other stimulants to be huge triggers for my anxiety and could induce panic attacks. My body confuses the physiological effects of caffeine (esp increased heart rate) as severe anxiety, even when I objectively know I am not anxious. Made the mistake of getting a cold brew in college, I thought I was going to die. It felt like cardiac arrest. I have also tried edibles in hopes that they would help my anxiety, however I had the same issues as I do with caffeine, but with added psychotropic effects. I found that it would make me feel super agitated and too stimulating. I’m glad to hear that you had similar experiences with weed triggering your anxiety.
These boys got some strong glasses game
Jordan's definitive response to being on medication for the rest of his life was super comforting bc I always wanna just play expert mode and try to go without my meds and it just never works out. I listened to that part of the video 3 times.
Great! Now just bring on StrangeÆons and all the commentary channels I watch will be on one podcast episode.
long furby gang unite
Again with the small youtubers!! Danny is for sure going places! 💕
Ikr! Jarvis and Jarvis at amazing
Finding out Jordan has bipolar II as well makes me feel like one of the Sad Boiz myself. Plus playing Runescape...
RSD is such a huge part of having ADHD that not enough people talk about. And it's SO MUCH MORE than just being overly upset about rejection. It insidiously seeps into so many other aspects of life. The biggest impact it can have also is an above average sensitivity to FOMO. I will buy things I don't need because they're "limited edition" and I don't want to miss out. I used to actively avoid seeking a romatic partner, even though I wanted one due to a feeling that it would make me "locked into" the relationship and I couldn't flirt as much.
There's also another weird dimension of it where the "rejection" side of it can also manifest in the form of not wanting to concede in an argument, or compromise on an opinion. It's this weird thing where it's like "I can see where the other person is coming from, but I would find myself weak and pathetic if I backed down and admitted I was wrong in my understanding". It's this bizzare fixation with wanting to be RIGHT more than being a good person. The satisfaction of "winning" an argument is second to none, and I find myself chasing that high no matter how many bridges I burn WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY having an intense desire to be liked and not rejected. It's this awful double threat of "I'm gonna take hard opinionated stances, argue a lot because I value sticking to my convictions, but also, your not allowed to dislike me when I do that. Everyone MUST like me 100% of the time or I'm gonna have a meltdown and depressive spiral"
I’m a year late to this coming out, but it feels extremely relevant to me know. I’m vibing so much to this! Thank you for talking about mental health!
55:00 I had the same thing a couple of years ago. I was just watching Netflix on my sofa and suddenly it struck me. My first though was, "How the hell am I having a heart attack as a 20yo?". The pain ended up coming and going in waves over 5h, and I ended up in the ER and spending the night at the hospital.
It's to date the worst thing I've experienced. I was actually thinking that was going to die.
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.... there is a finally a word for what I feel. I truly believed all my friends hate me cause they wouldn't text me every day.
i used to have exactly those dissociative episodes drew describes at 1:06:00 . my therapist told me that they were indeed panic attacks. everyone is different but i hope that if you experience them as well, then this helps you define how you’re feeling
What drew is feeling at 1:06:00 is dereality. A feeling like a dream state or that things aren't real. Its related to dissociation! I get dereality episodes a lot and I've never seen someone else go thru them so it was cool to be like: hey!! Same!!
I guess me and drew are.. the same person now???
Sorry about your panic attacks, Drew :( I was fortunate enough to only have experienced panic disorder for a year, but it's still awful... I was paranoid every single day, refused to eat and thought I was dying. As a result, I had to move schools due to my newly developed agoraphobia for a fresh start and it was the darkest time in my life. Eventually, the attacks lessened and one day it stopped completely. I of course had to force myself into normality in order to heal. This was not easy at all, but I conquered my panic in the end after many tears and suicidal thoughts. It's terrifying and I hope it gets better❤️
Thank you so much for being open about your panic attacks Drew and thank you for this conversation Sad Boyz. I have had a couple bad panic attacks (even in the middle of a work meeting) and they are beyond scary and it’s overwhelming.
This podcast is really necessary. As a person struggling with severe anxiety, depression and panic attacks for almost my whole life I can say: therapy and medicines are very important for living, as find a hobby or something to occupy your mind.
Shoutout to the sad boyz!
I’ve seen some conversation about medication dependence and I thought I’d share something a therapist taught me when I felt disappointed about being on meds long term:
Let’s use Serotonin/depression and anxiety as an example. People with depression have a deficit in the production of serotonin in their brain.
Now diabetics, they have a deficit in the production of insulin in their pancreas.
Both the brain and pancreas are organs. You wouldn’t tell someone with diabetes to get off insulin, or get over it, so why would you with a mental illness?
It's legitimately so refreshing to see content creators that I love talking openly and respectfully about deep facets of mental health. Having the jokes mixed in there but also giving each other the space to be vulnerable genuinely makes me feel like I am listening to my own friends talking to me about mental health. thank you to the boyz for this one
Omg Jarvis! 1:36:00 was something I've never heard someone else describe so well, it literally stresses me out to try and watch TV alone without doing something else at the same time. Its why I love podcasts, very easy way to add stimulus to an understimulating task/activity
Danny twice in a row eyyyyyy and the way you are slowly morphing into each other's face
Loved this episode so much, I've been in a loop of pushing away responsibilities, feeling bad about it, then pushing away that feeling of guilt by occupying my mind with entertainment.
I've just been procrastinating and doing virtually nothing productive, but oddly enough listening to this gave me the drive to try harder:)
I love how polite and genuine you all are. This is so good for the soul. 💕
It's really good to see an example of positive interactions between men. It seems like a lot of men really struggle with empathy and having friends, which can lead to some bad stuff
As someone who got diagnosed late in life with ADHD, struggled finding the right meds, then got diagnosed with bipolar, I am so grateful that yall are having this conversation. I feel so seen after hearing Jordan's experience and it makes me less self conscious! Much appreciation to yall, and thank you for the frank discussion of mental health
Pretending this is a dating game show and they all want to be my boyfriend.
I really appreciate Drew talking about his anxiety, it's so relatable. I've always had anxiety but I have a true panic attack this past year and I thought I was about to have a seizure. It was a feeling I hadn't experienced before and I totally understand where he's coming from when he talks about going to the ER.
This is a really good episode guys! Really enjoyed this one :)
that was fast
@@SadBoyzPod watch videos at 2x spd
@@darlhumanman2930 That's interesting :v
Edit:How did you understand anything?
Tina I’m deaf actually so I speed it up into a caption service and just read lol
@@madelynrapone6488 Ohhh... Thank you for explaining. I didn't know there were CC on this video.
Congrats on your speed run though!
Imagine making a podcast with the same guy twice smh my head
ikr smhmh my head
What do you mean this is the first time with Danny
Making the exact same joke that everyone else uses? Smh
Nettle Drawz what joke?
Y'all. I looked up RSD and talked to my therapist about it. It really matched up with my life 😭 this podcast is so fucking important.
this episode is one of the best things I have ever seen. I have had diagnosed ADHD for twelve years yet no one ever brought up RSD or depersonalisation. hearing people I admire so much sharing their struggles with issues I recognize is invaluable. knowing that people I look up to got where they are with the same problems I face is so inspiring
I feel the pain of Bipolar II so much
This is so refreshing!
As a late diagnosed ADHD myself, I love hearing Jarvis talk about his experiences. I know now that my intense coffee consumption was a coping strategy, and concerta changed my life. It’s hard that you have to function while you’re finding strategies and medicines that help, because the side effects can really make that difficult.
Thanks for normalizing normal experiences!
this was one of the most cathartic things ever the amount of stuff i could RELATE to that i previously was convinced no one else experienced is crazy
The thing Drew described about dreams feeling like reality and the feeling of zooming put of your body, I experienced that often as a child. Dreams and tvs shows sometimes felt real and I felt like I wasnt in my body or that I waa viewing it from the outside and I would have existential crises. The weird thing is, I didnt think it was wierd as a kid. Like, I somehow understood that life and the human experience was complicated enough that it was okay to have moments like that
This is your best podcast yet!! I love all three of oh so much and your dynamic together is so fun to listen to. Y’all also had such an important and interesting conversation, as a person with very severe mental health issues it’s always nice to learn that the creative people you look up to struggle just like you do. Love y’all, also settled is the bomb!!
fun hearing about what jarvis plays to go to sleep because i sometimes find one of drew's longer videos and use that in the background when my thoughts get too loud and i start feeling dread and panic lol
Hey so I'm like 3 days late but literally Jarvis talking about ADHD like,,, helped me so much, just the mundane example of RSD literally i heard that and just went,,, wait but that's literally my whole life.
I've been thinking I have ADHD for a while now? And quarantine made me think it even more, but I've been really hesitant to really do anythimg about it because,,, it seems really difficult and I "can cope."
Also because I don't wanna look like I just want to be different or something, but yeah I don't really have a coherent train of thought to put in this comment, and this has taken me 10 minutes to type, but just thanks for talking about that cause it really helped to hear that specific part and just the whole mental health part of the podcast.
I was diagnosed with ADHD about a year and a half ago at 20 and this episode has been incredibly relatable to all my experiences. Thank u so much for being so open and making this world seem a little less impossible to function in
Nice to have Danny on the pod for another week in a row!
thank you so much for this. i really needed that mental health talk. i’m super sure i have adhd but i have been so anxious to talk to my counselor and also super lazy bc i’m really depressed rn so this gave me the motivation and validation to go to someone who can do something and finding help. thank you❤️❤️❤️❤️
i struggle almost everyday with dissociation, which is what drew described. it felt good to have it validated (which was the the whole point of the segment lol)
Wait I’m the EXACT same way with getting anxious starting watching stuff like Jarvis said 🤯
Can big relate to Drew's health anxiety, was nice to hear him talk about stuff I've experienced!
It’s so refreshing to hear how much my experience is similar to Jordan. I had incredibly severe ADHD that I was diagnosed with just last summer after I turned 19. It turned into severe depression and anxiety down the road. I also have type 1 diabetes, and my lack of motivation to control my blood sugars made me stay in a constant state of hyperglycaemia, meaning worse brain fog, numbed emotions and no empathy for others which made it impossible to feel connections, worsening depression and a greater sense of loneliness, constant physical symptoms I didn’t care to understand, and an inability to even think that much was wrong. I was drinking alcohol all the time (illegally, don’t tell anyone) for that rush of dopamine and norepinephrine that my body was missing.
After starting Dexedrine, like Jordan said, I finally felt like a real person. There was a lot of adjustments, I’d crash and have depressive episodes, so I was bumped up to a pretty high long-acting dose. I had a very similar extreme panic attack to Drew that got me in the ER. I was “sitting” in the waiting room, hitting my head and jerking my body and standing up and sitting down and rocking back and forth bc I believed that if I stopped moving, I’d faint and slip into a coma. I was called a hypochondriac by my doctor and constantly felt gaslit by her. I felt like everyone thought I was a lunatic and it really got to me.
After cutting down on my caffeine (that I was still ODing on), taking better care of my diabetes, eating healthier, etc, I finally feel like a normal human. I can adequately listen to my body now and always am working on how to find solutions for spikes or drops.
I actually wanna start studying psychiatry and neuroscience, I have a fascination with empathy after lacking it literally my whole life up until I starting taking Dexedrine, and feeling empathy and connections and really feeling peoples’ emotions is one of the greatest feelings ever. I crave that feeling all the time, and it’s really opened my eyes to the world around me and strengthened my bond with my friends and my dad.
Whenever I get general anxiety now, or feel crazy, I think of how much better it feels to feel too much than to feel nothing at all, and that’s
this podcast made me decide to seek therapy and i’m super grateful
I fall asleep listening to RUclips (for the anxiety LMAO) and woke up towards the end of this. What I heard was so relatable it was genuinely absurd. My boyfriend is always baffled by how I need to be doing three things at once constantly, and now he gets concerned when I’m NOT listening to something. I’ve also been self-medicating the worst of my anxiety with alcohol whenever I set aside the money to get it for months now and have always been a social drinker. I also only watch RUclips, not movies or tv, because feeling like I need to be genuinely paying attention to one thing is stressful. This made me consider trying anxiety medication (or probably cbd, at least for now, because I’m too anxious to go to the doctor’s) more seriously. I’ll have to come back and listen to the rest of it later.