I Found the Formula for Self-Discipline (Literally)
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- Опубликовано: 9 июн 2024
- How much discipline do you have? Self-discipline is one of the MOST valuable skills you can have - and this rare US Army report reveals an exact formula we can use to get more of it.
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The Army turns thousands of regular men and women into disciplined soldiers each and every year - and this paper details exactly how discipline is built. "The Anatomy of Discipline" is a monograph written by Major Kevin S. Donohue for the United States Army Command in 1993. And if anyone knows about discipline - its the military.
This video will not only change your understanding of discipline - but it will give you a formula that you can start using today to build more discipline in your own life. This is life-changing information and I hope that you find it as illuminating as I did.
Read "The Anatomy of Discipline" here: kdocherty.com/anatomy-of-disc...
Timestamps:
0:00 - How To Build Self Discipline
1:21 - Defining Discipline
2:19 - Two Categories of Discipline
2:45 - Discipline B (Bootcamp)
4:40 - How Discipline is Built
5:50 - Resolving the Clash of Wills
8:20 - How to Become Disciplined
11:39 - Our Formula So Far
14:00 - Discipline A
17:04 - The Formula for Self-Discipline
19:16 - Discipline is the Most Valuable Skill
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Развлечения
to quote the iconic movie Barbie Princess Charm School, "Trying once is easy, discipline is hard, but nothing can defeat me if the change is in my heart"
Barbie is so real for that
That's a good damn barbie quote.
On Top Of The World
I love that
Barbie said that?! Damn who would've thought, ok you convinced me to watch it now 😅
Hi there, as a current soldier and sergeant, I would like to bring this back to reality a little.
We are disciplined so hard in bootcamp to serve and protect the citizens of the United States. This requires strict training and rigorous standards because without it, one boot could, in the future, get hundreds or thousands of fellow military members killed.
We are trained in this way to follow our leadership, good or bad. We have no space for questioning or giving feedback. It’s for uniformity and power in dominating the enemy.
We are yelled at to learn how to handle loud noises (gun fire, machinery, etc) on the battlefield and to keep going, and not freeze up from the overwhelm. We are expected to yell back because whispering in a war zone can get people killed. If you don’t yell back to your drill sergeant you will either: 1. Be yelled at until you fall into a heap on the floor, or 2. Be yelled at until you yell back “Yes Drill Sergeant” to your DS at an acceptable volume to them.
Bootcamp sucks on purpose because war is utter hell, and it gets you to a point where you can “embrace the suck”. You turn off the part of you that feels anything to just get through it, and achieve your mission. Because you have NO other option.
I have gotten way more disciplined in my life but it has a lot to do with the mental shift I learned to make in bootcamp. I turn off any feeling or thought of what else I want to do, and trudge on. It’s definitely a “I’ve been through bootcamp or X deployment or X mission, so I can probably handle this,” mindset.
Essentially, you get good at numbing out.
It’s super helpful, but not necessarily needed to build daily new habits like cleaning your room. I suggest following this video up with discussing Cognitive Dissonance Theory and the multiple experiments done on the importance of internalization (wiki it). That’s how you can instill change more easily into your psyche. Yelling at yourself like a drill sergeant is kinda dumb.
Also, I respect Jocko and his service to our country. He’s aspirational. But don’t think you need that level of discipline to achieve your goals. Seals, Green Berets, any other special forces team, eat sleep and breathe their training. They have to be that disciplined because they’re going into the most dangerous situations where they need the most qualified and trained team. And they can sacrifice a LOT (mental health, physical health, their LIVES, their marriages, seeing their kids grow up) for this training. You don’t need his 20-25 years of discipline garnered from Seals training to lose 50lbs or fix your finances.
The truth? The military is amazing at breaking down complex goals into very, tiny, daily tasks. We at times only did 1-2 types of training exercises each day, but over the course of months, that builds up to us becoming good at our job, or shooting a weapon, etc.
If you wanna, say, lose 50lbs using this “military discipline method” in a healthy way, I would:
1. Create an actually attainable goal (SMART goal, if you will)
2. JUST PICK ONE GOAL. We have ancient wiring, we oftentimes cannot focus on 1-2 longterm goals at a time. Stop trying to do it all at once. You have your whole life, chill out
3. Get super clear on why you want the goal. Stop lying to yourself if you feel you are about why you want something. Be real.
4. Get super clear on why you have failed previously. Don’t say you don’t understand why you haven’t lost the weight but order fast food 3x a week. Stop lying to yourself.
5. Conjure up every possible way your life will improve from accomplishing the goal.
6. Conjure up every way your life will continue to suck if you stay the same way. I also encourage you to just sit in that space for awhile. That practice scared me enough to move forward in the direction of my goals.
7. Figure out every single possible step it would take to get to that end goal, break it down into the most finite of steps you possibly can. Then take your steps and break them down further.
8. Only focus on specific way you’re going to work towards your goal at a time. For example, wanna lose weight? Cool, what’s the junkiest food you eat that you will miss the least? Stop eating that. Then work up from there. Do you want to work with your doctor to get a weight loss medication or procedure? That’s awesome, good for you to be honest with what you need to succeed. But you need to call to schedule an appointment first.
9. Condition your mind, everyday, that you love working towards your goal. Your conscious mind is the drill sergeant telling your subconscious (the new boot) that you love broccoli, broccoli is amazing, everyone up in your mind loves broccoli. Your subconscious will eventually agree. “I really want M&M’s drill sergeant.” Nope. We eat broccoli here, and we love it. You tell yourself that for 8 weeks, you’ll likely not hate broccoli anymore.
10. Work the plan.
The military has taught me to not BS. Any goal that’s achieved just takes some combination of the steps I mentioned above. We’re not magic people with magic training or magic teachers. There’s no such thing as that. Stop looking for it. No one is gonna save you but yourself, so get on it.
This is very useful. Thank you.
Thank you. I’m going to start yelling at myself and everyone except in the library. 📚 ❤
Wow... Respect your effort 🎉
That is really helpful, thank you very much for this thoughtful comment
Thats some crazy good advice. Thanks
Retired military here and I can tell you that without someone else to keep you accountable it can be hard. Either get someone who will hold you accountable or set up some things to make you.
* Get an alarm clock mat that you have to stand on to shut off or put a regular alarm across the room so you have to get up to shut it off.
* set your phone to remind you to go to sleep at a good time every night
* set up daily habits for your health and do them even in small amounts if you’re pressed for time
- clean, exercise, meditate
Maybe get a standing alarm and put it in your bed, lolol. It won’t shut off until you lay down
I want to finish writing my book. My most wanted accomplishment. It requires a ton of discipline on my part to consistently write and revise. First thing on my mind: hire an editor. Have an accountability partner to keep you on track. Not only is my money involved in that but also having a serious professional by my side helps me take myself seriously. It’s not a hobby. It is my book.
@@aletseaniram Same here. And it's frustrating sometimes because I know I already know and truly want to write this particular scene but I can't because my brain is stopping my hands lol
....that's the disapline part
That has always been my problem:
How can I hold myself accountable when I am one and the same person that decides to roll over in bed?
The result is not getting things done, it is shame after the fuck-up. And that pulls you down even more and it builds the self-image of being lazy etc.
Starting with discipline B is only possible with external sources. It is basically its definition!
To do that journy alone you require Discipline A, or at least some of it.
Ask for help people. There is no shame in that. (I am being a little hypocritical here, cause I am very bad at asking for help and depression makes the whole thing extra hard. Like most things building discipline is not easy, but it IS simple.)
I've been to boot camp and have been a soldier for 15 years. The most important thing I can bring to this conversation is that discipline can degrade over time, it needs to be practiced on a regular basis. I'm currently trying to get my discipline back. Thank you for the video!
What you brought to the conversation, I find really useful. Thanks.
Yeah, I see discipline more as a huge snowball, that crumbles every once in awhile. Imagine rolling up a huge snowball, and you let it roll down a hill, the momentum often times carries you, but once it stops, you kinda have to rebuild the snowball and roll it down the hill again. Not the best analogy but I hope it gets the point across.
@@zaidaliahmed7869I like that analogy!
This is very true from my experience, for some reason it’s even much harder to rebuild the discipline you had once compared to the first time
@@Tobelia Thank you :D
"Training yourself to obey your own rules"
hehe thank you Nadya!!
You're one of those creators who when I see you've uploaded, I usually drop whatever else I'm watching.
maaan thats just too sweet
Now that’s discipline 😂
Drop and give me 20 minutes
Amen, awesome video Kiana. Social media and smartphones has eroded self discipline so much for so many people. They resort to easy escapes from daily responsibilities. This video is gold.
Literally me too! Just did that 😂
This! This is why my golden rule is always, "go do the thing even if you feel like shit. If you still don't like it once you get there, then you can leave. But always show up." You get a boost for pushing through, and you come to understand yourself until being disciplined becomes part of you, like you said. I really liked your analogy of being both the good soldier AND the good sargeant. Definitely sharing this video, I know lots of people who need to hear this message!
Yeah! What changed my mindset the most for working out everyday was when my thoughts began telling me I didn't feel like it to just push them away, count to five and immediately put on my gym clothes. I realized that was the hardest part, I don't remember who I heard the 5 second thing from but it completely changed me, it made sure I at least showed up 100% of the times, even if some days I did 2 squats and then quit haha.
Start watching from 8:25
“How much respect do you have for your own word?” Thank you for that line!
This is a lovely outline for developing self-discipline.
I would like to point out an important difference in the process implemented by the US Army report and learning self-discipline by yourself. When you're first starting out, instead of punishing yourself when you couldn't follow through, realize that the failure was from drill-sergeant-you which gave the order. Especially when you're starting out, you don't have a clear idea of your limits, you might not know enough about your motivators, and you're inexperienced with taking into other factors that make things more difficult than anticipated. Drill-sergeant-you should be taking notes on what recruit-you can handle and adjust accordingly until both parts line up. Once you have a better handle on yourself, you can be more strict with following through without wiggle room.
Having self-discipline is well worth the effort as it is such a self-confidence boost to know that, above all else, you can rely on what you've set out to do because you've built that trust within yourself.
Awesome take
Great, and I'd add up from a personal experience, that sometimes you know you're mentally tough but that doesn't necessarily transition into all the other areas of your life, you may be able to push yourself physically beyond your limits, but when it comes to an EASY task that is completely out of your known territory, you may find your self unable to even start. Drill-sergeant-you should be able to notice that and dig to find the reasons behind it.
1:50 self discipline 2:04 Training urself to obey ur own rules 2:24 discipline b a 3:19 yelling
3:40 Structure Scheduled 4:05 4:15 Obey Orders4:53 5:45 Behavioral reliability 6:04 Resolving clash of wills6:18Greatness vs mediocrity6:32Power 7:06 higher self 7:35 *Show up & perform no matter how u feel
8:26 Standard Rules
8:47 Uphold Standards9:30Zero Compromise9:52dg
10:15*Follow ur Rules & Take them Seriously10:50^Sgt
11:31 Build 11:57*Create Orders that you'll only follow 12:26 Eroding all bark no bite 13:24*Keep Training to the point its Habit
14:00 Disciplined Habit to Disciplined Attitude
14:40 *Control from within over & over again15:19Arist 16:30 17:13 *Summary 17:48 bed 18:36*Build up routine lifestyle 19:10 &Be on guard on weakness & lazy behavior 19:41 *Force yourself & Just Do It
I havent been able to be as disciplined as I want until I got medicated for my ADHD. Now discipline is finally within my grasp if I apply myself. Before it was actually impossible. Even if you held a gun to my head sometimes tasks would overwhelm me and I would shut down. So bad I used to sit in one spot waiting to be able to start a task for as long as 3 hours, crying and wondering why I could not apply myself. But it was a total block. I am grateful to have a non stimulant med that helps me handle tasks.
Yes! Me too! Even with them, I still struggle, but they're meant to support us to build habits and discipline, not a cure-all. Like life won't change by itself, we still have to put in effort, more than most people, but it's not something we're forever locked out from. I really resent others who try and subtly discourage us when we talk about learning or implementing discipline. We're bound to fail, but it doesn't mean we can't try, and keep trying when we do.
And another thing that's helped me, is that the less thought I allow myself to have about tasks, the more I'm about to do it. It's difficult to quiet my brain, so I have use external stimuli, like shows or music to drown out my thoughts. It acts like a drill sergeant yelling over my own inner voice.
I have a genuine question - how did you start disciplining yourself to take medication? I've never been able to and so always opted for therapy routes over medication.
Just what I needed to hear. I was diagnosed yesterday and am waiting to start on medication. I'm feeling hopeful :)
@@zellalaing5439 I don't think taking your medication requires discipline. Sure, if you want to take them at exactly the same time every single day, then you need to build a habit around it etc. But in practise it's more of a "oh, right, meds!" kind of thought that pops up (phone alarms can also help) and it doesn't really matter if it's at five in the morning or at ten, they'll still help. Unless you have some kind of barriers, taking your meds - at least for me - is not associated with any kind of friction or difficulty (it's not something I have to make myself do, because it is such a simple task, plus the knowledge that I'll be in a significantly better mood and have more mental energy, makes them something I genuinely want to take).
But perhaps your experience is different? Physical negative side-effects or feeling like the meds alter one's persona are certainly examples of barriers, where one would have to use will power to make oneself take them. But in that case it's probably worth trying out different kinds of doses or types of medication, since it should be possible to find a combination that helps without having any noticeable downsides.
@@zellalaing5439the “discipline” for my meds is i know my life is almost unlivable without them.
thank you for all your videos kiana you’ve actually changed my outlook on life and i’m canadian too so i relate a lot to you (and i’ve lost a significant amount of weight as well) and watching your videos doesn’t make me feel like i’m wasting my time rather learning a lot and bettering myself ANYWAYS, thank you!! :)
Thank you so much for being here!!!
Me too!
getting out of a live in relationship with someone who was wildly controlling and finally being able to control my day to day routine, i find pride in making my bed everyday, getting in exercise daily, eating a well balanced diet, flossing everyday (silly but now i can’t go without it), wearing a retainer, reading daily, praying daily, etc. so much confidence comes from setting these standards and upholding them!
I'm crying because this video hit me really hard. I stopped in my losing wight process and I disappointed myself, and I want to be back on track.
You got this. ❤
@@uui219 Thank you!
I drink 2 cups of “bigalow” probiotic tea every morning. It helps with weight control. A little. Calorie intake is crucial. 👍
Man, I hate when you make intuitive sense but your good advice requires effort from me instead of just giving me supernatural abilities. Thanks Kiana >:-T
The moment you said "formula" I'm like OMG give this to me. I'm someone who for some reason can't do anything consistently unless I have a schedule or formula or something logical to grab onto and guide me. Btw Kiana, your videos are awesome. You disappeared from my recommended feed for a long time for some reason, but I just found you again!
Wouldn't fly in the military but I've found a journal is really good for keeping me accountable to my past self.
Honestly whenever I see videos of people being yelled at by army officials it makes me cringe, as someone who thrives on positive encouragement rather than avoidance of the negative.
When I did my first ever sporting event (orangetheory Dri-Tri) it was a constant berage of "YOU CAN YOU CAN!! YOU ARE ALMOST THERE YOU'RE DOING SO WELL!!" and I was on FIRE. I was determined to please, to make them proud cause they believed in me. I came 3rd place, after a childhood of being the kid that sat out of PE class.
On the contrary, I have had negative reinforcement shouted at me in my life as a form of "encouragement" and "discipline enforcemtn" and all it does is is make me go "you know what you're right, I AM a piece of shit and I CAN'T do this so fuck you stop asking". It's like, unless I'm being praised, I cry at best or snap back at worst. One of my core memories is doing cross-country and one of the PE teachers said "What are you doing?!?!?! you're nearly in last place!!!" and my response was immediate anger, and I stopped running, and purposely came complete last place.
My boyfriend has been the best thing for my health (physically and mentally) and growth cause he *always* says he believes in me. He believes I can. Whereas growing up, I was constantly ridiculed and told I couldn't. Told to give up before I even started. Nearly everything I did was met with negative reinforcement, and it discouraged me completely.
TL;DR: I'd be kicked out the army in a week cause I shut down unless I have positive reinforcement cause I have no drive to prove people wrong, only to prove them right if they say they believe in me. I couldn't imagein anything WORSE for my mental health and discipline than military training
I totally agree with you. I can see a lot of people have got something from this video. For me, I can’t think of anything worse than being yelled at. It’s abusive and unnecessary.
The way i burst out laughing at "you know what you are right i am a piece of shit- " 😭😭😭
There are actually studies that show shaming doesn’t motivate, people thrive on positive reinforcement. You are more willing to do the hard thing when you are being encouraged to do it not shamed for not doing it.
I’ve never had self discipline explained in a way where it makes it feel attainable instead of just making me feel guilty! Your videos are always top quality. Can’t wait to hear more about the course :)
US military after watching this: "FBI OPEN UP!!" 🤬🚓🚓🚓📢
LOL 😂
lol why would they go after the fbi?
@@Ajt17c They meant it more like "FBI, OPEN UP!" as in the FBI is knocking on her door for discovering the secret of discipline.
@@daredeflon662 🤡
@@Ajt17c 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Okay so watching more, this is actually great advice and how I finally forced myself to keep my fitness regimen going longer than two weeks. I have to forcefully shut the part of my brain up that wants to stop. Every time I want to quit, I imagine a trainer yelling louder at me, holding me accountable to keep going, that they won't let me stop. I don't know why I don't do this for the other parts of my life. I'm gonna read the document.
It's hard for me to stay disciplined because I've realized I always set up goals for myself that are too difficult or too extreme, like going to the gym 2 hours a day, six days a week, so I always end up failing. So I think that one of the most important things I've learned here is to start small and slowly build up more easy goals over the course of a year. Thank you so much for this video! I'll be adding it to my Favorites playlist and watching it more than once!
For the gym thing... rest days.
If you gym for 2hrs a day you likely need more thab 1 rest day
me at 2am: yes yes
This was so cathartic, I have built a disciplined lifestyle over years and experiencing daily fulfillment, peace of mind, joy, and better self management in the process…these standards and my lifestyle have slowly eroded with my new partner and some career moves and I have been feeling so down and disjointed, at times depressed from the deviation of my structure and the uphill battle to restore it- I want and NEED the elements of my previous life for lack of a better word but it’s been a challenge getting buy-in from my partner or support in maintaining the structure. Not consciously of course, consciously they are supportive but in practice and habits not so much.
Anyway I’ve been feeling like I’m dying and i couldn’t explain why such an extreme reaction, now i kinda get it. I achieved the first kind of discipline and existing in insubordination to it.
Time to say eff everyone and return to what makes me well
Things will have to shift
Thanks for the perspective
Showing them this exact comment might give them a lot of insight :)
Kiana, I'd *love* to see your take on executive function issues. With my ADHD, a lot of times I can’t even get myself to do the things I want to do because it feels like my brain is buffering. Your videos are always so well researched, I think you'd bring an interesting perspective to how neurodivergence impacts the process of behavior change.
Omg yesssss
Absolutely
Yes! 👍🏾
This! We don’t form habits like NT people so it’s sooo much harder to stay disciplined and “train” ourselves
YES PLEASE! 🙏🏽
That's a perfect description -- "my brain is buffering."
I wish I could reboot my brain like I can reboot my computer.
Something you should also take into account is that the army developed this method over several decades. Since you can`t have the same planning or control you have to regularly check the development of the plan and addapt it to your reality. For example I went to the gym for several months 4 times a week. At the end the results were amazing but I felt awful because it was too much exercise since most of my time went into work and I stopped. I should have changed the goal to 3 or 2 times a week before stopping.
My adhd self is SO excited for this!! 😅
The key is keto - only thing that removes my adhd symptoms
It doesn't work for ADHD. As building habits doesn't work for ADHD. because part of the brain and brain chemistry that make things into habits is excectly what is underdeveloped in ADHD brain. That's why we don't have habits, doesn't matter how long we repeat shit, even after 6 months of the same it is still A CHOICE EVERY TIME.
Until you understand this and how ADHD works, you'll be suffering in trying to do that bs like neurotypical people, failing and then blaiming yourself in it over and over again.
For adhd you need an actuall external drill sergeant because the part of the brain that should be that is the part that doesn’t work the same in adhd brains
@@winwinmilieudefensie7757 I understand, however since I've unintentionally succeeded in keeping a new diet and exercise routine going for longer than I ever have with a modified version on this, I'm going to keep trying, even during set-backs. I have nothing to lose, since I have nothing to begin with haha. I appreciate the thought though and I wish you luck in your journey as well.
@@LSG101097this is why hate that adhd is the new trendy disorder to collect. It's become the new "I'm so ocd" because someone prefers being organized and likes cleaning. Lacking discipline and being lazy is now considered adhd and this sets people who struggle with the actual disorder back so much and only further stigmatizes it.
Kiana, very interesting video. It’s important to remember the main reason why the army works is that puts recruits in a completely new environment that is tailored specifically for developing discipline B. Recruits don’t have to make any decisions and they receive immediate punishment when they fail. It’s almost impossible to recreate these conditions in most of our lives; we have to make decisions every minute of the day and the consequences of our actions aren’t always immediate. This is why regular people have to rely more on their intrinsic motivations to change things, instead of extrinsic ones like in the army.
sounds like an excuse 🤔
Very true! I suggest watching struthless videos. He's mentioned "thinking backwards," and basically asking yourself why you HAVEN'T achieved your goal. You quickly can see your hindrances, and you can start there: by removing them from your sight/environment.
A lot of this is also really close to what the book Atomic Habits talks about, start small and make sure you do it
I love the way this frames it that it's a standard for yourself, and that not listening to those standards is not taking your own voice seriously though
I've read Atomic Habits, and while I really enjoyed it and it all made sense to me, I've had such a hard time actually DOING it. I run into that problem a lot. I'll take in all this great advice but then I'll struggle to actually change.
@@sparkymularkey6970Atomic Habits is such a great book and it's easy to get motivated while reading it. I've had to implement a few of my own "make it obvious/satisfying" habits to remain motivated to actually make the changes though e.g. I put pictures of my loved ones/places I've been and want to go back to on the fridge to remind me why I'm doing what I'm doing. He also mentions a paperclip trick where you move one paperclips from one pot to another once you've completed a task. I've started something similar where I add a paperclip to a chain everytime I cook a meal for myself and keep a rough food diary at the end of the day. I chose to count that and make that my chain to stop myself from ordering out, snacking/skipping meals and to just get better at cooking in general. It's still early days but I find keeping it top of mind and in my face like that has helped me stay motivated and make changes for the better.
@@sparkymularkey6970It helps when I look at myself like a machine. If I'm able, then I have no excuse not too do sometjing. No excuse whatsoever. I try to do this in every aspect of my life. With more or less succes. But where it helped me the most was to go to the gym every other day for the past 4 years, no amount of sleepiness or other discomforts counted as valid excuses not to go. Not pain either. I'm trying to see myself more as a machine too in the aspects where the method didn't work so well, now that my weight is good. I also think about the hard life my gransparents had. My parents even, still. They can turn themselves into disciplined machine, there is no other reason why I can't do the same except that I grew up way more spoiled than them and still live more spoiled. But humans were build to be strong and to fight for things, not to sit and watch youtube too much 😂
@@sparkymularkey6970 It's such a good book and I found it easy to get motivated while I was reading, but it was hard after I put it down and tried to put things into practice.
I found giving myself visual reminders/cues of why I was doing what I was doing helped - "make it obvious" as James Clear says. I have pictures of people I care about or places I want to go or go back to on my fridge and I took one of the examples he mentioned about moving a paperclip from one container to another once you achieved something and made it my own. Instead, I have a chain of paperclips and add one to the chain each time I cook my own meal (I find it easier to have something physical instead of just crossing stuff off a calendar). That way I'm challenging myself to cook instead of eating out or snacking and (hopefully!) getting better at cooking too. Not sure if this will help you, but keeping the reasons why top of mind and in my face has helped me make change.
Some accountability is also good - as scary as putting yourself out there might be - I've entered a pact with some friends who were already on a weight loss journey and we have each set a realistic goal, proportional to body size and a deadline when we all weigh ourselves.
Same for me, the implementation has been my issue. Just downloaded the Atomic Habits app, Atoms, and looking forward to seeing if it helps me :)
I didn’t know I was doing it at the time, but in the past two years I have really taken control over my health and well-being, and it all started with taking care of my teeth. Kind of like making your bed in the morning, I adopted a routine of brushing and flossing exactly according to the dentists recommendations. It’s not that I was brushing my teeth regularly before, but now I do it properly every day, and it bleeds into other good habits. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I’ve nearly gotten myself out of the overweight category and into the “normal” one in the process!
Me reading the title: for the love of god LET THIS NOT BE CLICKBAIT OR AN EXAGGERATION. 😭
I can't believe there's an actual 100 page pdf, thank you SO MUCH. You have no idea how valuable this is, I'll read it tonight. We have all heard that discipline must be trained and what not, but I feel like now it's been explained to me with actual steps to follow. I will think about this video every single day from now on.
Also that clip about making your bed made me want to clean my whole room lol. I'm so grateful for this content, thanks again Kiana!
Your comment made me SO happy you don't even know 😩❤ thank YOU!
@@KianaDocherty I feel like commenting is the least I can do lol, this advice can be used for a lifetime. I'm really grateful that you put out information for free that could help transform people's life. It's caught me at a time in which I really needed resources like this, know that you've helped me tremendously! Thank you so so much ❤️ can't wait to read the whole paper
I rarely take out a notebook for a yt vid but the minute I saw the title I literally ran for pen an paper coz I trust that Kiana won't give me some strange spiritual tips or clickbait me with generic info. Thanks so much for this vid.
hell yeah 😏📔💪
hope you ended up finding it useful!
@@KianaDocherty it was very helpful. Thanks so much🙏🏽
Also😱 can't believe you replied to me. I feel like I'm texting a celebrity now 😂
I did the same! LOL I've got three pages of notes here! :D Good job, Kiana!
I like the idea of our own selves being the sargeant who enforces the standards, us being the brave soldier who follows through and also us being a good and patient leader who has a sort of vision, who believes in baby steps (instead of creating impossible standards then feeling frustrated you didn't achieve them)
This is an incredibly in depth and motivating take on "Fake it 'til you make it." I feel like now I understand and I feel very inspired hearing the solid proof that ANYONE, yes even me, could actually become disciplined through training. Thank you!
i watched this when it came out, and updating now, so far this video has actually changed my life. not allowing myself to stay on youtube long enough to tell you the entire story (at least yet) since i have stuff to do but from the bottom of my heart, thank you
Excellent video as always!
I’ve found that this has worked incredibly well so far for my weight loss and financial goals. Right now I’m not doing anything too crazy, but I’ve completely banned myself from ordering any food delivery. I’ve been off the DoorDash for a month and a half, and while it’s a tough habit to kick, just being 100% consistent in that is already giving me the confidence boost to begin pursuing other goals and working towards having zero compromise on THOSE goals.
It’s awesome seeing the things I’m discovering for myself validated through a video like this. Your videos are a great source of inspiration for me in my weight loss journey (20 lbs down, 80 to go🎉) so thank you for the incredible content!
Love hearing this! 💪Congrats!!
Yeah I totally agree the zero compromise thing is a game changer!
Ever since I found your channel around covid I’ve always been waiting for new videos. I’m currently in the middle of my weight loss journey and I genuinely appreciate the time that goes into these vids and how much they help me
I'm going to share this video with a friend of mine. He lost 115 pounds last year. He's trying to help his mom and his sister do the same, but they're both resistant to change and not receptive to his advice, unfortunately.
He needs to keep leading by example and help them come to the relazation that THEY want to change on their own. It would be more helpful for him to talk to them about why they might wanna change or why they don’t want to stay the same. They are in pre completion stage based of what you have said.
Thank you for the post! Going to keep a diary of my journey. 65 years old but never too old and now that I’m retired it will be good to structure my days now so they are not just frittered away.
Yes! 62 here.
This video couldn't have come at a better time for me. After being battered by circumstances for the last 4 months or so, I've fallen off the wagon and gained back 15 of my 152 pounds. I've been struggling to figure out how to get back on track, and asking myself again and again why I can't just get back to where I was with my behaviors. Turns out, I've eroded my respect for myself by "caving in" and making all those exceptions during holidays/vacation/illness periods. No wonder I don't respect my own rules anymore! This is such a wonderful framework and template for me. I literally can't thank you enough!
Self discipline reveals your identity. We think that we are consciousness but that is a part of a whole. Self dicipline is the conguence between self and awareness.
Watching your videos has been a great ally in my weight loss (60lbs down for now). I think this video is the cherry on top of the cake. Thank you for this, love the new content, very excited about what's to come! Blessings from Britain x
As someone with ADHD, I've considered the military brainwashing me into a disciplined person due to my lack of executive function. Thank you for this video.
I was going to ask about this - I also have ADHD and people don’t realize that habits do not stick. I could do something for four months daily and then miss a day and I’m back to square one. It’s so hard.
@@fulcrum1575 best advice is to follow the dopamine, and also notice it. Don't want to get dopamine from social media validation and stuff, seek to get dopamine from positive things that add to your already positive dopamine-seeking behaviors, and you'll be multiplying your success. ADHD is a huge gift if used correctly. You're basically a genius that can't get started. Leonardo DaVinci had ADHD!
All or nothing thinking, maybe? I get that. It’s a tough one.
Tough having that kind of thinking process, which doesn’t work. Read, “Feeling Good” by dr. Burns. He addresses that. I read it a long time ago. I think he says it’s like one little ink drop in a glass of water, but now all your brain sees is blue water. His advice through cognitive behavioural therapy is valuable, even though CBT has recently fallen out of fashion, in current therapy circles.
Just finished watching this again. I kept pausing and made notes on it this time. Got more value from this than most books I've read, you articulated it in a way that was very easy to understand and clicked with me. I hope the small views comparative to your other videos, doesn’t put you off making this kind of content again. Thanks a lot, really appreciate it.
I love this sort of more research based content from you, Kiana. I watch all your videos but these ones actually stick with me and help me change for the better. Thank you so much.
OK now THAT has been the MOST useful RUclips video I've seen all week! Even before it was finished, I'd already formulated a plan on how to gradually begin installing more discipline into my days, excellent content, seriously, thank you! (Now to look and see if your course is available yet!)
What a great video! I have always had a feeling that breaking promises to oneself leads to a downward spiral and seeing it articulated like this is very reassuring.
Some of the concepts reminded me of Atomic Habits (start small, repeat until it becomes a habit, build it into your identity) but the addition of holding yourself accountable is very valuable 😊
Kiana, I justed wanted to say you are amazing. Usually I see a video of yours and just play automatically, but this time I decided to listen to it carefully and took a little more time to click so I could really listen and absorb the info. It definitely was eye opening. I have NEVER been disciplined, I force my self to get things done and that's it. The only thing I really engrained in myself was working out. I hated working out until 27 years old, and I still don't enjoy it at 33, but I do it twice a week, even after birth, as soon as the doctor let me, I was back at it because I couldn't let myself stop. But in other aspects of my life, such as work and cellphone usage, I simply force myself to do things, most of the time they get done with a lot of effort, but sometimes it's too much. Thank you for your video, I can't wait to see the rest.
This is so interesting! I have heard so many influencers say before ‘to create discipline you have to think ‘i AM this kind of person’’ but it never made sense until you explained it this way. Thank you! Love your videos
Underrated content. Excellent presentation. Very captivating.
each time you're dropping content, it's making my day, thanks for the well documented content kiana!!
Wow Kiana, you outdid yourself on this one. i had to re-watch it to make sure I fully absorved it. I got so much from it, but the part where you talk about self respect and keeping one's word to oneself, this is my biggest take away from this video, because I often fail myself and break my own promises and knew that it affected me, I just didn't understand how. thank you.
This was amazing!!! Can’t wait to see more videos like this 🥳
Watching this at 3.30am after a 2 day binge. Definitely needed to see this. Thanks for all your hard work. Feeling motivated now. 🖤
Dude.... Any update on how this video changed your daily life
How are you
Thank you for this video! I like how over the years you went from reaction videos (where you just hinted about behavior change from time to time) to that becoming a focal point of your content!
Kiana, your videos are always top notch and thought-provoking. I've just turned a new page in my life and was already intuiting some of these points, but you really laid it out nicely.
Kiana - this is your best video to date. I hope you can crack through the algorithm and find your niche in the self improvement space.
Don’t be discouraged by the imbalance of views as opposed to the algorithm friendly content. This is great stuff. Keep it up!
I'm already loving the new content. Thank you so much. Keep going! It is excelent!
Adhd left the chat
😂😂😂 I left and came back
😂😂😂😂😂
Keep crying over adhd and waste your life
😂
I’ve got ADHD and believe me it’s possible, I’ve grown my skill so much but it is so much more challenging than the average person, but this means it’s even more important to master because we have so much potential creatively. I have weak moments on my bad brain days… but my well-being and future success requires me to keep trying hard.
Haven't seen this detailed video about discipline. Probably going to watch it again to let it sink in. Thank you, Kiana!
Very interesting, but, to me at least, it's a sensible topic. Put your self-respect on the line is a double-edge sword that I would not advice to anyone. I was 19 at the time, and I wanted so bad to be self-discipline that I've done exactly that. I was so serious about myself, but I failed to stick to my rules (that were way to big I admit). The consequence have been extreme. I've made a major depression that took many years just to regain a kind of trust in me. Today, 25 years later, I'm feel great and on my way to acheive my dream. I still work everyday on self-discipline and my friends consider me more disciplined than most people. But to me, the success of self-discipline lie on the way I value myself. And it's by an authentic effort to obey my rule, no matter what's the outcome. The major shift that change everything to me came by reframing the way I internalized failing. I not scare of failing anymore. I even embrace failing. Like the harder that I can. Failing is the legitimate counter part of creativity, and I just welcome it. At the end, the only rule that I observe strictly without any compromise is to never ever disrespect myself for failing, and just retry with an authentic effort the next day, while smiling if possible. A big game changer for me.
The problem with military disciple working is that we forgot all the people who failed and leave the program because they could not follow it. For neurodivergents, the result of that kind of extreme disciple could be catastrophic in term of mental health.
A great book on the subject of habits is the one written by Fumio Sasaki. The ideas are almost the same but it concern a larger range of personality.
Your timing for this video and my personal life is amazing. Finally feeling healed enough to get back into fitness and motivated to eat healthier.
Being out of practice I was a bit lost on where to start. This video has helped me think of my first steps
So since I've watched this video, I've started doing some things to change my self discipline. I obviously didn't go all militant on myself, but forcing myself to read, learn a language, learn to drive and meditation. Has given me this ability to just keep going. I find myself setting a goal for an hour and then doing it for an hour and a half. It's helps with self esteem much more than I thought it would.
❤❤❤❤ The video I will keep rewatching it when I need that reminder of how to actually achieve self discipline
This is seriously helpful. Thank you so much for covering this paper, and distilling it into actionable steps!
How hasn’t this gone viral yet? This is such a succinct way of summarising what we all need - building up structure, self respect and trust in our abilities. When successful, the knock on effect is huge - the confidence we gain, and the expectations we raise towards others. This is adulting 101! 🔥
Hey Kiana, just wanted to say that this might one of the most important vids you have made. I am going to try best to adhere to these principles in order to change my life for the better. Thank you for insight and effort in making this effort. 👏
This video couldn't have come at a better time. I've been really down on myself for not sticking to my workouts and stress eating candy and junk food at work. Thank you so much for making this and I'm definitely gonna take this one to heart 💜💜💜💜
Yay you! ❤
Love the video! You structured the information and worded it beautifully in a comprehensive manner that the concept makes so much more sense now and can be used on a daily basis, thank you!
Truly a new perspective. Being uncompromising with your orders and being a reasonable drill Sargent. This will be my guide on my way to building a self disciplined self.
Thanks so much for searching all this stuff and packaging it up for us! Great video as always xx
Love the concept of making promises to one's self like they would make promises to friends and loved ones. Goes back to how we talk to ourselves guides how we talk to others.
I’m glad you literally found it as opposed to figuratively finding it.
Everyone should see this video!! Amazing as always
loving the direction your channel is taking. don’t get discouraged if they don’t get as much views as ur other videos as your audience will also be changing a bit. ❤❤
That’s so true. Her audience (many) will be people beginning a process.
Your hype up to the video was very good. It got me excited when you uploaded the video
IDK why RUclips took so long to put you in my feed!?!? But I'm SO grateful I'm here now!!!
Subbed!!!
Thank you for making these videos. You don’t understand how much you’ve changed my life ❤
This video is just Pure Gold! I'm so glad I found your channel some time ago! 💪
The distinction between Discipline B and Discipline A offers a profound insight into building true discipline. It's crucial for entrepreneurs to develop both the observable behaviors and the internal attitude to consistently meet their goals and lead effectively. 👍
I've been really struggling lately to motivate myself, and this video, OMG! Kiana I've been watching your videos for over a year now a this video is something else! Thank you so much!
Very insightful video! I’ve always hated the idea of self-discipline, it’s something I wanted to have, but never wanted to train towards. But this makes it feel more achievable.
There’s lots of “life changing” stuff on RUclips that the phrase sometimes loses its appeal. But this video IS actually life changing! I’m grateful that you created it. I have been doing work on a methodology I call “Courage Hacking”. Your video not only helps give me clarity since both Courage and discipline are similar virtues of wills but also got me thinking “Discipline Hacking”. They both are activated from within through core values and uncompromising standards.
This is great work. Thank you 🙏🏿.
This is so profound and exactly what I needed at this point of my life. Thank you
This is amazing information! Thank you so much, Kiana for doing the research and presenting this fascinating topic so brilliantly.
Your content is so useful and inspiring, I’m applying this ASAP
The dog training thing reminded me of something. Parenting consistency. It's something that I had to get into my husband's head (career military) that you can't just threaten consequences and not follow through. We both grew up in homes like this. We had a decent amount of self-discipline & knew that our parents wouldn't kill us or throw us off the 2nd floor balcony and could have seriously rebelled. We both had siblings who became extremely violent as teens because of the lack of consequences in the home. Our kids were not kept in line via fear, but if they broke a family rule, the consequences were stuck to. It started when they were young, you can't hit your friend or we are going home, then following through, for example. It's a building process. Both kids are disciplined adults, including one who followed Dad into the Marine Corps.
I recovered from drug addiction in October 2021 where I started continue to do a lot of these things listed especially building up to a life style. I did start making my bed everyday to create routine but if I get too busy I’ll make it at night before I go to sleep because the feel of getting into a made bed is so rewarding. It’s a little things that add up! 😊
For me, it started with a genuine desire to improve my home from clutter, and then to lose the weight for my feets before i got worst. I got information and inspiration from youtube, slowly built result with patience, then it became second nature, and it showed y self that i was capable of acheiving things. Then it slowly translated in my personnality and in all sphere of life until i could no longer handle being disorganised in general or not being busy all the time. You could say dicipline sneaked its way into my soul lol.
The idea that discipline is doing what you said you’d do just because you said you’d do it has me going to the gym 5 times a week ever since i saw this video. It really is life-changing.
Thank you for creating the video. This is going into my important videos playlist.
THESE are the super interesting and informative Kiana videos I keep coming back for. Thank you for producing this!
Lol... did 20 years in the service. This sure brought back a lot of memories. Accountability, applying one self, getting the job done ASAP is just one of those things that gets instilled in you to fit in and function accordingly in the military. Love the video, thanks for the upload.
Girl, THANK YOU. This is actually so usefull. I have struggled with self discipline for so long, and it's because I don't respect my own rules. I have a little devil on my shoulder saying "don't worry about it, why deprive yourself, you might die tomorrow anyway" I am so rule oriented in following rules from other authority though. I am really going to try to put this formula to use and start with very small rules. Great content!!
Best. Self-Discipline. Video. Ever.
And I'm old, I've been around awhile, I've heard a lot of "great" ideas. But this, this is the real deal.
Well done, Kiana Docherty. You just rocked my world.
This is life-changing clarification indeed. I'm on point to put this to practice. Thank you and blessings, from Brazil.
That's kind of what happened to me! I started with easy tasks that were 100% achievable and slowly added on the desired habits. At first I think my habit list only included one stretching session and one study session per day. Right now my daily routine includes so many different tasks (like doing push-ups, taking a cold shower in the morning, studying, reading, listening to podcasts, doing resistance training and so so on), but doing all of them feels natural and not like a burden (well, maybe the resistance training feels like a burden, that's why I only have it twice a week lol). Have I had to start with all of these, I wouldn't have even tried. But gradually raising the difficulty and training myself to act disciplined actually made so many positive changes!
One tip I've learned is to seperate all the routines into small doable tasks. For example, "Hold plank for 30 seconds", but then add three of those and voila - you are holding plank three times a day, but it's easy and doesn't take as much time and effort as three reps, which makes it just so much easier mentally. It might be less effective than doing reps, but it is one hundred percent more effective than doing nothing lol
Great vidoe, Kiana! I needed this just now. I'm making changes, establishing new standards, even setting a new daily schedule.
Love this! Super excited about the direction your channel is going!
Super valuable content. Keep it comin. Thanks Kiana!