Don't Compare Yourself to Others | 5 Minute Video

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  • Опубликовано: 12 фев 2017
  • Have you ever envied someone else's success? Do you sometimes wish you had another person's life? Well, comedian Tom Shillue explains why comparing yourself to other people will put you on the fast track to an unhappy life.
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    Script:
    Do you ever look at the lives of people around you and say, “Man, I wish that was me!”?
    You know you do. Everybody does. But I bet you never compared yourself to me. Haven't heard of me? I do have my own TV show…in the middle of the night.
    When I started I wanted to be as big as Jerry Seinfeld.
    I'm not. And yet, I'm a pretty happy guy.
    Here's why: I stopped comparing myself to other people. Seriously, that's the whole trick. Here's what I mean.
    If my happiness were based on being the biggest comedian in the business, I'd be mad at whoever was getting more Netflix specials than me. (I have zero.)
    If it were based on having the best TV ratings, I'd be mad at Jimmy Fallon. He beats me every night.
    And if it were based on being rich, I'd be mad at a lot of people.
    And even if I were rich - really rich, like #10 on the Forbes 400 rich - I'd be mad that there were nine other people richer than me. It never ends.
    Comparing yourself to others creates a totally unrealistic measure for what constitutes success. And I know, because the entertainment business is all about unrealistic expectations.
    All through my career I'd meet with satisfied customers after my shows and they'd say,“Hey, you're good! Maybe someday you'll be successful like Jerry Seinfeld.” He's the measure of success? The top guy?
    When someone tells you they're a doctor, you don't say, “Well, maybe someday you'll cure a disease and save millions of lives, just like Jonas Salk did for polio.”
    Or a lawyer: “Oh, wow, so what's your ultimate goal? The Supreme Court?”
    Do you see how crazy that sounds?
    Professional success is about making a living, pursuing excellence, and finding meaning in what you do.
    When I first started doing standup, I was a nobody. It took more than a decade of playing in front of tuned-out crowds before it started paying the bills. Ten years is a lot of time to tell jokes for no money to people who aren't laughing.
    In those days, I spent a lot of time thinking about the comedians I admired. The guys at the top. I wanted those big, sold out houses I wasn't playing. The big paydays I wasn't making. The TV specials I wasn't doing.
    And not just their success; their talent. I'd look at comics like George Carlin, Robin Williams and Louis C.K. They were all able to turn their dark, personal struggles into brilliant comedy. I envy their talent, but I wouldn't want the dark personal struggles that went along with it.
    If you don't factor in everything about whoever you're comparing yourself to, you're playing a sort of mix-and-match game that doesn't exist in the real world.
    For the complete script, visit www.prageru.com/videos/dont-c...

Комментарии • 2,5 тыс.

  • @TomorrowWeLive
    @TomorrowWeLive 7 лет назад +3082

    As the saying goes, "Better to be a first-rate version of yourself, than a second-rate version of somebody else."

    • @Papatim85
      @Papatim85 7 лет назад +65

      Tomorrow We Live never heard that. i like it

    • @TheRealOtakuEdits
      @TheRealOtakuEdits 7 лет назад +29

      That's perfect.

    • @Pomiferous
      @Pomiferous 7 лет назад +4

      Leave me out of it.I would rather compare you to others in a negative fashion.

    • @oa6551
      @oa6551 7 лет назад +3

      Wow...

    • @Pomiferous
      @Pomiferous 7 лет назад +11

      Bullets Forteeth
      I'm thinking most people find that accumulating things that end up in landfill suits them best,but.Your point is well taken.

  • @rowland5951
    @rowland5951 7 лет назад +2183

    This problem has been amplified through social media. People posting only holidays,relationship status etc.

    • @guildam7105
      @guildam7105 7 лет назад +135

      easy stop using social media

    • @jjc5475
      @jjc5475 7 лет назад +52

      true, or follow other things. i like my social media for info. news' government policies, politics. science.
      but facebook? i have it because other ways i will lose a lot of contacts. but i hate it so much..

    • @Cstank5
      @Cstank5 7 лет назад +57

      Take it as a challenge to not become envious or jealous, teach yourself to be inspired and motivated by them every time you see one of those posts. You have to rewire your brain because otherwise you will automatically compare yourself to them. Take it as a good situation to practice changing how you think because you'll never get away from seeing more successful, beautiful, famous, rich people

    • @rowland5951
      @rowland5951 7 лет назад +15

      Cstank5 I guess so I think people have confused aspiration with inspiration. Its very easy to get caught up in the hype of success not knowing the sacrifices or problems that come with it.

    • @jb.drills
      @jb.drills 7 лет назад +7

      Or the other way around... posting about how hard their lives are so they feel kind of entitled to other people's attention

  • @sting7167
    @sting7167 6 лет назад +546

    I once heard a quote that went "Don't compare yourself to how someone else is today, compare yourself to how you were yesterday." I'm starting to follow it!

    • @lennart9197
      @lennart9197 5 лет назад +22

      That´s from Jordan Peterson´s book 12 rules for life but it´s super helpful

    • @WeNightFall
      @WeNightFall 5 лет назад +12

      @@lennart9197 nope it's from icarly seasson 2 episode 5.

    • @ninar1218
      @ninar1218 5 лет назад +2

      Thats a good one to follow

    • @topic260
      @topic260 4 года назад

      @@WeNightFall yes

    • @James-il3tq
      @James-il3tq 4 года назад +3

      How about don't compare yourself to anyone, even yesterday's version? Comparison is the work of the ego.

  • @mysteriouspotato4033
    @mysteriouspotato4033 5 лет назад +1652

    Send this to indian and asian parents pls

    • @halaa3565
      @halaa3565 5 лет назад +73

      High on Taeyeonism and arabian parents please

    • @constipatedbowels3473
      @constipatedbowels3473 5 лет назад +38

      @@halaa3565 are Arabian parents also competitive and naggy about thier child's success just like Asian and Indian parents are?...I wasn't aware of dat...!...maybe itz a problem wid while eastern part of the world,(like Asia,Midde East and some parts of Europe)..

    • @halaa3565
      @halaa3565 5 лет назад +11

      Constipated Bowels now you know that.

    • @constipatedbowels3473
      @constipatedbowels3473 5 лет назад +5

      @@halaa3565 all thanks to u....I don't know how dat improved my life thgh...we r screwed for having born in dis part of the world...!..

    • @piyushmajgawali1611
      @piyushmajgawali1611 5 лет назад +59

      Indians are Asians

  • @marashah.ibrahim
    @marashah.ibrahim 6 лет назад +3284

    So basically *Be happy and appreciate everything you have* .

    • @Kaicenatclips208
      @Kaicenatclips208 6 лет назад +20

      ace 1121 right basically

    • @Svsqvz
      @Svsqvz 6 лет назад +37

      U saved me almost 5 min thank you

    • @marashah.ibrahim
      @marashah.ibrahim 6 лет назад +5

      salvador Vasqez lol thanks

    • @NeoJSsk
      @NeoJSsk 6 лет назад +2

      Or First! Take a Big Step Back.....

    • @rowo175
      @rowo175 6 лет назад +3

      Laziness

  • @mercy6263
    @mercy6263 5 лет назад +192

    "You want your own life- only better"
    really hit me

  • @liorasitelman1856
    @liorasitelman1856 5 лет назад +239

    A wise woman told me this: "somewhere, someone out there is praying fervently for something you take for granted".

    • @vertue1000
      @vertue1000 4 года назад +8

      Thanks for sharing, this help me a lot!

    • @someonesomeone25
      @someonesomeone25 3 года назад +3

      That just makes me feel worse though.

    • @viktorilinkolov7114
      @viktorilinkolov7114 3 года назад +1

      The fact that you're doing better than somebody else doesn't mean that you're doing well.

    • @liorasitelman1856
      @liorasitelman1856 3 года назад +3

      @@viktorilinkolov7114 no but there is always something to be grateful for

  • @Yorker1998
    @Yorker1998 6 лет назад +804

    I'm nearly 20 and have no social life and never have had a girlfriend while most my age have. I cannot help but compare myself, I feel so far behind in the social aspect. Hopefully I can turn it around soon.

    • @muhammadnajmimurindo9289
      @muhammadnajmimurindo9289 6 лет назад +117

      +Cam Find yourself dude :-) , be yourself , find your dreams , and hard working for it .....

    • @vladimirpopa8576
      @vladimirpopa8576 6 лет назад +105

      Cam be yourself, gear yourself progressively, build morality, values, principles, don't rush things, be in control and everything will be great.

    • @derenbong6060
      @derenbong6060 6 лет назад +106

      it's alright, don't get pressured by the society around u, move at ur own pace, u will reach there eventually

    • @davesaenz5691
      @davesaenz5691 6 лет назад +110

      Cam You're not missing out much. With a girlfriend comes a lot of stress too. In fact, mostly stress. People will shoot and kill others over it. It can be a difficult and sad part of your life. Do this instead, find yourself a friend that's a girl. Dont get too attached but learn from yourself.

    • @nabbit5574
      @nabbit5574 6 лет назад +56

      Don't worry. Relationships are useless

  • @rjsteeves
    @rjsteeves 7 лет назад +682

    I compared myself to Hillary, and it turns out 2016 was a very good year for me.

    • @JaysonT1
      @JaysonT1 7 лет назад +4

      Robert LVN 😅

    • @saulgonzalez1645
      @saulgonzalez1645 7 лет назад

      Robert LVN are you a real nurse?

    • @rjsteeves
      @rjsteeves 7 лет назад +6

      No, just an LVN. But when I finish this next round of very expensive college classes I'll be a Real Nurse (RN).

    • @danielandres1579
      @danielandres1579 6 лет назад +1

      Perfect comment

    • @abhimanyuboopathi2014
      @abhimanyuboopathi2014 6 лет назад +1

      😁😁😁

  • @jbro8934
    @jbro8934 6 лет назад +98

    "Compare yourself to your past self."
    Words of wisdom!

    • @davisdenver6756
      @davisdenver6756 5 лет назад +2

      Speaking from experience, I can confirm that is true. :)

    • @gilgabro420
      @gilgabro420 3 года назад

      Not better to be honest lost a lot because of covid.

  • @sandikawijayaaji7271
    @sandikawijayaaji7271 6 лет назад +668

    Key to happiness = be grateful

    • @vladimirpopa8576
      @vladimirpopa8576 6 лет назад +8

      sandika wijaya aji key to happiness = health & $ lot of $$$.

    • @muhammadnajmimurindo9289
      @muhammadnajmimurindo9289 6 лет назад +2

      That's right ..

    • @alphalobster8021
      @alphalobster8021 6 лет назад

      Rings a bell ;)

    • @ZLProductions
      @ZLProductions 6 лет назад +5

      Turns out I'm always the same amount of greatful for my life, I can't force myself to be more greatful. That's how it's alway gotta be like. And once something painful happens then I realize that it was way better before it got painful. seems like you need to suffer in order to gain perspektive. So it always evens out. Life is a burden a lot of times and then it's hard to be greatful. I'm not gonna pretend like I'm greatful when I'm not... The key to happines is to find things in life that makes you happy, It could bee a good career, or a person that you like. But if you don't have anything to be happy for then there is just no way to be greatful!!!

    • @helena3990
      @helena3990 6 лет назад +2

      sandika wijaya aji.... Absolutely RIGHT 😘

  • @nattyboii4905
    @nattyboii4905 6 лет назад +377

    My parents always compare me with somebody, that's how it all happened

    • @Altegore
      @Altegore 5 лет назад +14

      Same here...

    • @blankblank5735
      @blankblank5735 5 лет назад +15

      And your grandparents did the same it’s a never ending thing I feel your pain we all do

    • @monocyte2210
      @monocyte2210 5 лет назад +14

      Are you from an asian household?

    • @bisansahli5655
      @bisansahli5655 5 лет назад +8

      Same here, I give up with my arab parents

    • @KnigthMare69
      @KnigthMare69 4 года назад +11

      Natty Boii i feel you man... my mother used to compare me a lot with my 2 years older cousin, in a manner that I don’t care for a word my mother says anymore, not even when it’s a positive thing. My relationship with her became something that a stranger would relate better with each other than us both. Like, so what if I’m in the pursuit of becoming a professional cyclist and he’s in medicine college? Let him be and do what he love, I support him but won’t feel the need to compare myself

  • @skullfucker3381
    @skullfucker3381 7 лет назад +480

    I compare myself to hitler and it has brought me more success in life.

    • @melbetmccurdy917
      @melbetmccurdy917 7 лет назад +14

      ResoundGuy Time to overtake Holy Roman Empire and annex Poland, lol.

    • @curiouswolf424
      @curiouswolf424 7 лет назад +31

      ResoundGuy Probably doesn't have enough to pay the gas bill

    • @melbetmccurdy917
      @melbetmccurdy917 7 лет назад

      Dankus Memus 'He was way better than you' dude, did you even watch this video?

    • @skullfucker3381
      @skullfucker3381 7 лет назад

      ResoundGuy there are other ways to kill, welcome to the era I helped create which you will never comprehend, all heroes do not end up in books.

    • @skullfucker3381
      @skullfucker3381 7 лет назад

      ResoundGuy Glad i could help.

  • @MikhaelAhava
    @MikhaelAhava 7 лет назад +177

    Explains why I feel depress, and constantly failing, unable to live the moment.

    • @mongxengxuang2350
      @mongxengxuang2350 7 лет назад +20

      Dude just chill out and live your own life. Sure some people especially those close to you will have their own perception of 'a good life' will enforce their own ideals on you, but as long you live an honest life, it is a good life. Everyone has their own role in the world, and that is what makes living great. Love others but most importantly love yourself first.

    • @SupernaturalIsNormal
      @SupernaturalIsNormal 7 лет назад +3

      MiguelPmpM envy of what others have and do is the problem. I desire to be able to give more and that heals the brokenness that is within. The other main factor is this.....envy is sinful, and sin destroys makes us feel horrible, because we have stuck our noses to Yeshua Adonai saying "How you made me is not good enough!" You are a great person....one of the greatest to have ever been created. There are non like you...not ever! So live realizing your uniqueness and most of all Live for following Yeshua...He is love, happiness, and joy!

    • @Partyffs
      @Partyffs 7 лет назад +6

      Try watching more porn.

    • @jjc5475
      @jjc5475 7 лет назад +3

      ehm, all those tips are really fun, but if you are depressed. like really depressed. you maybe should get some help and/or get those sweet antidepressant pills. 💊

    • @armandomontero2423
      @armandomontero2423 7 лет назад +5

      Porn is always the solution for everything ;)

  • @koreanelvis
    @koreanelvis 4 года назад +28

    I grew up in an Asian household. Growing up as a Korean child, you were always compared to every other Korean child in your community. It’s only when you yourself open your eyes that the realization hits you that it doesn’t matter. That’s when your self-esteem finally grows. You finally succeed; because you’re not someone else. You’re YOU! Thank you for this video. Very informative!!!

  • @antwto8784
    @antwto8784 5 лет назад +44

    Did stand up for 10 years with no pay - damn thats dedication to his craft!

  • @marymagmartha7453
    @marymagmartha7453 6 лет назад +245

    "Do not compare yourself to others for you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater or lesser persons than yourself." It's easier said than done. From youth we've been taught to be competitive with others, but never encouraged to compete against the better you.

    • @thebeastofmeeliasmaldonado1942
      @thebeastofmeeliasmaldonado1942 5 лет назад +4

      Whats wrong with that if someone is not as good as you good for you and if they are better just focus on you nobody else but is your life so live it

    • @iamedyson
      @iamedyson 5 лет назад +1

      @@thebeastofmeeliasmaldonado1942 You must be Guatemalan. I have the same last name. Coincidence?

    • @thebeastofmeeliasmaldonado1942
      @thebeastofmeeliasmaldonado1942 5 лет назад

      Edyson Maldonado yeah bro you may be right i dont even know great insight tho

    • @DMRoper1
      @DMRoper1 5 лет назад

      True.

    • @justalittleturtle5600
      @justalittleturtle5600 4 года назад +4

      I think competition is a good thing. No competition at all, as has been proven by the schools over the last 2 decades, severely drains a person of an essential drive. The drive to win or be better. Too much competition, and making everything in your life a competition is bad. It makes us greedy and sad. I will never say that isn't the truth. But no competition at all makes us lazy and even more sad. Being taught friendly competition from a young age, that it's okay to not be the best, but that you need to try hard if you want to be better, is a good thing in my opinion. It teaches children a lesson that will follow them into their adult lives. Hard work is essential to success, you won't be given the same award as Larry, who tried much harder than you, in the real world. You need to try harder than anyone else to get the best stuff. It not only makes for the best result(whatever is being done will be done FAR better), but the person doing it will have a sense of accomplishment. They'll be satisfied and happy with what they've done. It's bad though when a person gets too competitive and feels bad every time they're not the best. So they should also be taught they it's okay to fail, and that failing is the key to a better success.

  • @murnahan
    @murnahan 7 лет назад +471

    Agreed! I only measure against my best. It's a much happier life.

    • @stumblingupward723
      @stumblingupward723 7 лет назад +2

      Mark Aaron Murnahan danm, you beat me. With a longer and more substantial comment.

    • @MikhaelAhava
      @MikhaelAhava 7 лет назад

      Mark Aaron Murnahan
      Well played.

    • @murnahan
      @murnahan 7 лет назад

      thewebmaster of the deep :-D

    • @MikhaelAhava
      @MikhaelAhava 7 лет назад

      Mark Aaron Murnahan
      Wow.

    • @murnahan
      @murnahan 7 лет назад +4

      MiguelPmpM It's all the explanation I had at 4 a.m. :-D

  • @smashfanatic
    @smashfanatic 4 года назад +31

    Look up the seven deadly sins and "envy" is one of them.
    There will always be someone out there that's better than you. While it is important to always strive for success and make yourself better and not settle for mediocrity, looking over the fence to see how much your neighbor has that you don't can only bring misery.

    • @tyskai8339
      @tyskai8339 3 года назад +1

      That's easier said than done

    • @royisdabest
      @royisdabest 3 года назад

      @@tyskai8339 but it is possible

    • @Human1136
      @Human1136 Год назад

      @@royisdabest no it isn't

  • @JoannaHenwood
    @JoannaHenwood 5 лет назад +39

    "Be yourself - everyone else is taken!" ;-D

  • @JEROMEGELB
    @JEROMEGELB 7 лет назад +178

    TOM, you're a fabulous human being!!

    • @joemccarthy35
      @joemccarthy35 7 лет назад +17

      I wanted to write the same thing.

  • @productionmark
    @productionmark 7 лет назад +262

    You're right! The best thing to do. So simple yet so hard in these days...

    • @Pomiferous
      @Pomiferous 7 лет назад +4

      Then simple is far more nuanced than it first appears ?

    • @derenbong6060
      @derenbong6060 6 лет назад

      I understand u, the media makes it hard, but, I as a young adult recently found the sweet spot where u have a car, a place to live, able to spend money on social events with my fren's,
      once I found that sweet spot, I can slowly achieve my dream, at my own pace like what I do with the G spot!

  • @stonewall11b1984
    @stonewall11b1984 4 года назад +11

    This brought a tear to my eye. I’ve only ever compared myself to others. This was a powerful and difficult truth to accept.

    • @adamarnoldsen5405
      @adamarnoldsen5405 3 года назад

      That would make a great character arch in a book.

  • @DMRoper1
    @DMRoper1 5 лет назад +5

    You know, this helps. I was pretty down on myself so I came searching for something motivational to lift my spirits. Found your video. And you are right. Everyone has pain. You can't look at other people's lives without seeing the full picture including all their pain. Thanks for this sobering reminder.
    And by the way, you were never "nobody", even when you had no money and no one was laughing at your jokes. Thanks again for lifting my spirits today.

  • @bobjim4126
    @bobjim4126 7 лет назад +35

    I wish I knew it when I was younger. I had a whole inferiority complex (which haunts me to this very day), I compared my self to my best friend at the time and to how I can become popular like him, smart like him, and good with girls like him. I was under his shadow of his wings... I was aware I shouldn't compare myself, but I was so jealous! I wanted so hard! But when he moved away, when I found new friends and I realized my life didn't have to be focused around him and having the same friends and life as him, I finally felt... At ease. Everything felt lighter. I didn't have to try to be like him anymore. Today I still have some issues with the subjects, like scars from the ordeal. I came to the realization in the video in the long way. It took me 6 years to understand, but I finally did. I shouldn't compare myself to another person, I shouldn't want what he has. I should aspire for my own success, not his. I should aspire for friends who are mine, not his friends. To be like myself, not him.
    Thank you, whoever the reader is, for reading so far. I hope I didn't bore you.

  • @jordanwendt3359
    @jordanwendt3359 7 лет назад +398

    When I watch "Cops" or "Beyond Scared Straight" I feel better about myself.

    • @samcgilbert
      @samcgilbert 7 лет назад

      same

    • @samcgilbert
      @samcgilbert 7 лет назад +2

      is that bad? lol

    • @happiny4847
      @happiny4847 7 лет назад +3

      me too

    • @worsel555
      @worsel555 7 лет назад +33

      Man, my place is a total mess... *Watches Hoarders* Wow, my place is pretty clean!

    • @sekovittol3124
      @sekovittol3124 7 лет назад +3

      Ken williams - Hey, I can still see the floor here! By comparison, I am pretty neat. (by comparison)
      PS, I have 9 cats.

  • @csalt1242
    @csalt1242 5 лет назад +64

    man, I wish I had as many subscribers as this dude
    wait..

    • @wazgoin6926
      @wazgoin6926 5 лет назад +7

      ChloChloa lmao dude

    • @smsdba955
      @smsdba955 5 лет назад +1

      ChloChloa: that reply was beautifully ironic. :-)

  • @supersam5002
    @supersam5002 4 года назад +4

    This video came at the right time. I often find myself feeling down and depressed because I don’t measure up to how smart or successful some other person is. This video really helped me realize that instead of envying certain parts of people’s lives that are better than mine, I should feel grateful for the things I have in my life.

  • @LoneWolf-qy3gx
    @LoneWolf-qy3gx 6 лет назад +235

    AS BILL GATES SAYS: " WHEN YOU COMPARE YOURSELF WITH OTHERS, YOU ARE INSULTING YOURSELF"

    • @ricardosilveira5792
      @ricardosilveira5792 6 лет назад +4

      Hahah, Bill Gates said something very similar, but that one above is definitely from Hitler. 😂

    • @peteranon8455
      @peteranon8455 6 лет назад +2

      No holyX, Hitler's mistake was going to war with Russia, just like every other major empire who has ever done so. The frozen tundra is the worst possible target for military conquest.

    • @vidyanandbapat8032
      @vidyanandbapat8032 6 лет назад

      I always feel ashamed of comparing myself with anyone, infact thats the only thing I always feel ashamed of.

  • @Ken-ur8kt
    @Ken-ur8kt 7 лет назад +378

    PragerU is so good

    • @doualdoual8106
      @doualdoual8106 7 лет назад

      FireSnipe

    • @MrFrigginAwsome
      @MrFrigginAwsome 7 лет назад +3

      FireSnipe they're a propaganda network for big money interests

    • @beanoforyou
      @beanoforyou 7 лет назад +14

      MrFrigginAwsome you're a sheep following people who treat stupid people like a sucker

    • @gorkaaustin5306
      @gorkaaustin5306 7 лет назад +1

      MrFrigginAwsome Sheep.

    • @DolinaSmerti
      @DolinaSmerti 7 лет назад +5

      +Iputonshirts Just admit that both of you are following herds like sheep (wait, and me?).... But c'mon, you have to admit that prager has an agenda, a righ-wing agenda, I assume you've seen it before, with them denying climate change, them supporting american exceptionalism, etc.

  • @dal.salvador
    @dal.salvador 6 лет назад +30

    This made me so happy thank you.

  • @vbudnar9688
    @vbudnar9688 3 года назад

    Thank you! It's a real eye-opener! Since my son turned 15, I have been subconsciously comparing him/his achievements to his more successful peers.
    I need to get off his back and respect him, as himself!

  • @jamestipsfedora
    @jamestipsfedora 7 лет назад +59

    I, for one, stopped comparing myself to others around the age of 22 when I realized I was still a jobless NEET permavirgin living in my parents' basement watching Chinese cartoons and committing onanism multiple times a day (mostly to Chinese cartoon girls).
    I am very proud of this accomplishment.

    • @marttini7
      @marttini7 7 лет назад

      so, your comment proves that you didn't stopped to compare yourself to the common sense :P

    • @young7931
      @young7931 7 лет назад +6

      James C.
      Praise kek!!!

    • @forestmanification
      @forestmanification 7 лет назад +1

      Scholar and gentleman, I tip you adieux.

    • @fathimohamed3469
      @fathimohamed3469 7 лет назад

      21 & still doing that. Tell how you are doing now.

    • @ArmanCortez1
      @ArmanCortez1 7 лет назад +4

      Well........
      One can''t deny your confidence :D

  • @ridgemondhigh4891
    @ridgemondhigh4891 6 лет назад +84

    The problem isn't so much about comparing ourselves with people we admire --- after all, they can serve as excellent role-models. The problem is the notion of keeping up with the Joneses, where we "have to" have an SUV/luxury car, own a suburban home through a mortgage (instead of living with our parents), thus getting into debt, and having children even though we may not be ready financially and otherwise.

  • @Packinheat1175
    @Packinheat1175 5 лет назад +1

    Bob Odenkirk is a great example of this. He’s a friend and a totally down to earth guy who worked his butt off for a long time to get where he is now. Excellent message in this video.

  • @TheJohnscot
    @TheJohnscot 5 лет назад +1

    You deserve all success that comes your way. You are a great man.

  • @prasadramesh326
    @prasadramesh326 7 лет назад +40

    this is exactly what Buddhism teaches

  • @thewinterlord1518
    @thewinterlord1518 7 лет назад +179

    I'm really satisfied by this channel. It is not only a very good channel about society, politics and economy, but it is a motivational source, better than any other "your-feelings-matter" liberal outlet. Thank you all.

    • @vutruongquang3501
      @vutruongquang3501 6 лет назад +3

      I'm not really sure about the "politics" part, dude :v there are propaganda everywhere and of course there are trust-worthy channel too but do not rely on the news they give you too much. Sometimes i found that there was quite a bit "personal feelings" on PragerU channel about some certain problems

  • @lenardregencia
    @lenardregencia 5 лет назад +47

    Don't Compare Yourself to Others,
    Mind your own Business.

  • @DavidRivera-kj9hf
    @DavidRivera-kj9hf 4 года назад +48

    “Don’t compare yourself to others”
    School, Family, Workplace and Society:
    *”ALLOW US TO INTRODUCE OURSELVES”*

  • @LearningAmerica
    @LearningAmerica 7 лет назад +80

    Man, I needed this so much today... Thank you :)

  • @MikhaelAhava
    @MikhaelAhava 7 лет назад +15

    No wonder I fail. I compare to everyone else.

  • @johnetanpitaluga89
    @johnetanpitaluga89 6 лет назад

    That has to be one of the most life changing lessons ever. Thank you.

  • @steven-vn9ui
    @steven-vn9ui 6 лет назад

    Some people go through their entire life not realising this Tom, I really feel bad for them. You have hit the nail on the head! It took me a while but I got there in my mid thirties and it's definitely the way forward.

  • @Ladeliciadelinda
    @Ladeliciadelinda 7 лет назад +330

    So true! It's a simple but effective way of thinking once you really apply it to your life. Sure not comparing won't change the reality but at least you can allocate that frustrated energy to something more productive. Such as working on your own success.

    • @sandeep2435
      @sandeep2435 6 лет назад

      La Delicia De Linda La Delicia De Linda very Right said madam .Not comparing yourself with other does not block the difficulty and hardship that a person is destined for.The thing that is inevitable will happen in one's person's life noone can stop them .Still by not comparing with other they will remain contented .What we should remember is contentment is also a bigger source of happiness(considering difficulty persisting in one's person's life).

    • @LuisCalderon-su2pe
      @LuisCalderon-su2pe 6 лет назад +3

      La Delicia De Linda Q delicia! LOL

    • @davidwilkerson1032
      @davidwilkerson1032 6 лет назад

      Luis Calderon kkkkkk tinha que ter um brasileiro comentado isso kkkk ( mas ela é mesmo) hahaha

  • @tjmooremusic
    @tjmooremusic 7 лет назад +6

    " If you compare yourself to others you will either become vain or bitter for there is always someone better or worse than you in some way."

  • @luziaflone1951
    @luziaflone1951 4 года назад

    Thank you Tom. I oftentimes forgot to be grateful for having what I have. Because I've been looking to someone richer, or looking like they are happier in social media.

  • @KingsWorld2015
    @KingsWorld2015 6 лет назад

    Couldn't be further from the truth. You Sir have just hit the nail on the head. It's never ending, if you start to compare yourself to others.

  • @WhtetstoneFlunky
    @WhtetstoneFlunky 7 лет назад +158

    A few thoughts went through my mind as I watched the video. The first thing I thought of was how I consider myself to be lucky in life. I feel like I am lucky because I could have been born in Siberia in the 18th century and lived a tough and probably short life. Or I could have been born in China in the 6th century, had children at age 15 and toiled in a rice paddy for the entire 17 years of my life. But I was born in America towards the end of the 20th century. How lucky can you get? And then there is the chance meeting of this guy...
    My boyfriend did not do well in school. His lack of academic aptitude left him with essentially no chance to select a career. He was relegated to picking a job that had a balance consisting of as much enjoyment as possible, with the best pay. But where he does not have academic ability, he has this innate wisdom. He does not and never has viewed his life in terms of career. His philosophy is to go through life enjoying each day best he can and hopefully taking some people, like me, along with him on his quest for happiness. Contrary to what the video says; life is not necessarily hard. Ask him if his life is hard and he will tell you no, it is fun.
    Rarely, almost never I have looked at someone else's life and wished I had it. On the contrary, I have wondered how many people have looked at my life and wished they were in my place. I know there are a few, friends mostly, because they have told me.

    • @AttRandyReynolds
      @AttRandyReynolds 7 лет назад +15

      Not only is there an element of luck to be born in America when we were, there is an element of luck just to be born.

    • @LisaCupcake
      @LisaCupcake 7 лет назад +1

      Life is hard in terms of obstacles you'll come up against. It won't always be a bed of roses and the older you get, the more you'll realize that. There are constantly bumps in the road that we have to deal with (job losses, loss of loved ones, breakups, illnesses, etc.), but that doesn't mean it's not worth it. He didn't mean that life hard to navigate, just that everyone has their share of problems.

    • @WhtetstoneFlunky
      @WhtetstoneFlunky 7 лет назад +2

      I don't think everyone has their share of problems. We all have a few problems but there are those whose yardstick for success is not the same as most others. I tend to look at life not day to day or even month to month, but more from the my earliest childhood memories to now. I think one's sense of obstacles is largely contingent on the path of the life, and state-of-mind. A friend of mine wants to marry someone with a decent income, have a house in the suburbs, and raise a couple of healthy children. She envies those who have that. I want to enjoy today while at the same time not doing something stupid to ruin tomorrow. Which of us has more obstacles and will face more problems?

    • @tealeyevisuals7446
      @tealeyevisuals7446 7 лет назад +2

      +Chicago Shawn
      "there is an element of luck just to be born."
      You didn't asked to be born.

    • @AttRandyReynolds
      @AttRandyReynolds 7 лет назад

      Shooting Range Productions It would be a difficult proposition to be asked to be born.

  • @arnyarny77
    @arnyarny77 6 лет назад +22

    it makes sense totally, we should ONLY compare ourselves to ourselves, when i think back to how i used to be.....wow

    • @luchipunchi98
      @luchipunchi98 5 лет назад

      arnyarny77 how have you been doing? it's pretty hard to get that idea out of your brain

    • @xx_fiv3tw0_xx10
      @xx_fiv3tw0_xx10 5 лет назад

      But it makes even more sense when you see others same level as you.and then they dont waste their time later on they have all they want wild others who waisted their time struggle and are unprepared for life, but since you compared yourself to him and decided to challenge him you haved already becomes a happy man in the end.its a lesson to learn by experience not by quotes.and this is a different situation to anybody

  • @DerfalS23
    @DerfalS23 3 года назад

    Hey, Tom. Just want to let you know, whenever I get depressed about where I am now in life, I always go back to this video to help me remember all the good things I have in life. Thanks, Tom.

  • @paultworek8753
    @paultworek8753 5 лет назад +3

    Thanks for that, :) going through a bit of a struggle lately, the positivity and honesty in your video helps.

  • @quanganhvu6791
    @quanganhvu6791 7 лет назад +54

    I don't usually compare myself to the lives and successes of others but I do use my parents as a measure of success. I grew up in much better conditions than my parents did, something that many people can relate to and I do think that it is our duty to reach their level or even surpass them. Otherwise, all the effort and sacrifices they made for us would be for nothing.

    • @phoenixrise3126
      @phoenixrise3126 6 лет назад +3

      BE CAREFUL with this attitude. It is your life and you live your best life. You have no obligation to match or surpass them, only to reach your goals. This is coming from someone who thought exactly the same as you.

    • @ryshlovanoodo7591
      @ryshlovanoodo7591 6 лет назад

      Lol wouldn't you being alive and healthy be a blessing to parents who love their children? And besides getting saved by repenting and trusting in Jesus is the most important thing you can do. It wouldn't matter how successful you were if you end up burning in hell.

    • @TheTariqibnziyad
      @TheTariqibnziyad 6 лет назад

      Quang Anh Vu thats false, your parents have lived their lives, its up to you to live your own, your father may be a CAO, does that mean ypu should reach his level? there is no obligation whatsoever to reach a "level", i dont even believe in those levels, a simple happy craftsman with respectable earning is happier than a forced ingenieer because he does what he likes.

  • @thinhla5906
    @thinhla5906 7 лет назад +43

    There are there things people usually do to make their lives more terrible
    First: Amplify other people's happiness
    Second: Amplify their own unhappiness
    Third: Repeat doing those two things
    So I think what Tom said was definitely true! You'd better compare yourself to your past-self and then find the best ways to improve your self rather than try to imitate what 'the top guys' did
    Thank you. Have a nice day everyone

  • @alvinkim1305
    @alvinkim1305 5 лет назад

    This video was one of the most inspiring videos on self help that I haven't seen in years. Thank you so much.

  • @rhysf.505
    @rhysf.505 6 лет назад

    This is probably the only video in the world that every single person can learn from. Genuine thanks.

  • @MrMusclekid88
    @MrMusclekid88 7 лет назад +83

    One of Prager's better videos for sure

  • @jontvedt944
    @jontvedt944 7 лет назад +32

    When PragerU is finally right about something

    • @jontvedt944
      @jontvedt944 7 лет назад +6

      Bandicoot Captain Crunch Yeah haha, I am not exactly very conservative.

    • @E2Moto
      @E2Moto 7 лет назад +3

      I always agree with Praeger U until they talk about marriage.

    • @GrandMasterAbe
      @GrandMasterAbe 7 лет назад +19

      E2Moto PragerU ain't TYT. You are not obliged to agree with it.

    • @E2Moto
      @E2Moto 7 лет назад +1

      I understand that, and there is no such thing as 100% agreeable unless you have a hive mind. In every group you get involved with, there are always things you won't agree with.

    • @genericasian5699
      @genericasian5699 7 лет назад

      E2Moto Growing up with on and off parents, I gotta agree with them there. It's better if people work it out.

  • @xCharjx
    @xCharjx 3 года назад

    Even 4 years later this has help. Thanks Tom and Dennis.

  • @Amy-zr4zp
    @Amy-zr4zp 5 лет назад +1

    Thank you Tom ! Such a eye opener. Greetings from Amsterdam !

  • @tolkienfan328
    @tolkienfan328 7 лет назад +385

    already three thumbs down. who could have a problem with that message.

    • @mattsmith-we8ny
      @mattsmith-we8ny 7 лет назад +113

      progressive commies who watch tyt

    • @Papatim85
      @Papatim85 7 лет назад +34

      matt smith all 3 of them

    • @michaelazarov5416
      @michaelazarov5416 7 лет назад

      TolkienFan32 peope who do not agree with the video?
      me for example.

    • @luisraulraudales2468
      @luisraulraudales2468 7 лет назад +1

      TolkienFan32 damn, it's 59 now, what is it with these people

    • @ronnickels5193
      @ronnickels5193 7 лет назад +8

      luis Rodriguez They may just disagree with the message. I feel that the message of 'be the best you that you can be' can be a path to mediocrity.

  • @philofblood855
    @philofblood855 7 лет назад +135

    wow you delivered the message so good i wish i could do it just as good as you

    • @philofblood855
      @philofblood855 7 лет назад +8

      dude to the top this comment is underrated

    • @JaysonT1
      @JaysonT1 7 лет назад +15

      Bruni You're both better commenters than me. My comments suck compared to these.

    • @alib1155
      @alib1155 6 лет назад +1

      I see what you did there.

    • @karimd88
      @karimd88 6 лет назад

      Lol😂😂

    • @TrisnoadiWikantoro
      @TrisnoadiWikantoro 6 лет назад +1

      The irony😂

  • @jeromecenia868
    @jeromecenia868 5 лет назад +3

    This is an eye opening for me. I was dreaming to become somebody else and forgot who and what I really am.

  • @darrelllewis400
    @darrelllewis400 6 лет назад

    This is by far one of the most powerful statements that I have ever heard. I don't know Tom Shillue and have never heard of him, but I am definitely a fan of his now. Looking forward to seeing all your material. Thanks for your insight

  • @yesim289
    @yesim289 7 лет назад +1135

    Easier said than done....

    • @goosecouple
      @goosecouple 6 лет назад +145

      dogayilmaz 12 it can be done if you believe in two things, that is people are not meant to be equals in everything; stay away from Communism.

    • @kevb1959
      @kevb1959 6 лет назад +4

      True enough.

    • @Akirabone
      @Akirabone 6 лет назад +21

      Not really, it's called "contentment"

    • @DREWSKIBOY1
      @DREWSKIBOY1 6 лет назад +2

      dogayilmaz 12 But it had to be said

    • @cruisin8221
      @cruisin8221 6 лет назад +12

      Try harder..

  • @chadliampearcy
    @chadliampearcy 7 лет назад +62

    This is one of Prager's good videos.

    • @antwto8784
      @antwto8784 5 лет назад +3

      Its a feel-good video
      I honestly felt better after watching it

  • @Simurgh1000
    @Simurgh1000 6 лет назад +2

    The best PragerU video I have seen. Thank you!

  • @b.j.3620
    @b.j.3620 6 лет назад

    It is such a lovely thing that there are a lot of happy and intelligent people on Earth. Life is an insanely awesome ride.

  • @CidPsy
    @CidPsy 5 лет назад +5

    Thankfully I learned of not comparing myself at a young age, I learned:
    "When you compare...there is always a winner and a loser...On what side are you when you end the comparison?"

  • @ghhg-je8wv
    @ghhg-je8wv 7 лет назад +19

    Nailed it!

  • @pranjalvw2193
    @pranjalvw2193 Год назад +2

    Always compare yourself to who you was yesterday than who someone else is today

  • @ronent9441
    @ronent9441 6 лет назад

    me and my wife did it 4 years ago, one big step to healthier life!

  • @minim6981
    @minim6981 7 лет назад +6

    needed this today!

  • @SpankytheTswana
    @SpankytheTswana 7 лет назад +301

    Be the best you and someone will want to be like you :)
    #inspireothers not make em jealous

    • @melbetmccurdy917
      @melbetmccurdy917 7 лет назад +2

      SpankytheTswana Whats the benefit on being surround by envy people,its better to leave them inspiration rather than a feeling your life has bigger value tham they lifes

    • @SpankytheTswana
      @SpankytheTswana 7 лет назад +2

      That's what I meant mate. Didn't mean make them feel jealous but make them feel inspired to say, "Man, I want to be like this man."

    • @melbetmccurdy917
      @melbetmccurdy917 7 лет назад

      SpankytheTswana I know,but when a person say something like that it doesnt mean he/she wants to go same path for succsss,its that he/she just want your success,your ultimate form and achievement and they usually dont care what it really takes to get into such position.
      If your point was the inspiriting than I agree,even trought that I hate when anyone say to either other person or me 'I want to be like him/you' just cause of what they actually tried to say.

    • @melbetmccurdy917
      @melbetmccurdy917 7 лет назад

      SpankytheTswana I have friends who want to leave they lifes totally and become somebody else,they dont want only they success,they want they lifes entirely instead of having imorovments at they own.Thats very familiar to fanatics tho.

    • @cool2570
      @cool2570 7 лет назад

      SpankytheTswana Thanks, okabe

  • @dixonng5894
    @dixonng5894 6 лет назад

    I learned this some time ago after going through some crisis. Today, I try not to compare myself to others but do my best in whatever I have to do. There is another part to happiness; don't take the people around you, the life around you for granted.

  • @tornedsky
    @tornedsky 2 года назад +1

    once i stopped comparing, i stopped feeling envious! its so freeing🥰

  • @franklinyoung
    @franklinyoung 6 лет назад +12

    I needed to hear this here I really did......be yourself that's all do. wut u can be .. yourself but be yourself...

  • @lordmalal
    @lordmalal 7 лет назад +27

    this is the best advice I've ever heard. now I didn't hear it first from Tom Shillue and have been trying to follow it for years. but the presentation here is excellent and I hope that more people watch and follow this wise advice

  • @jonathanselassie5502
    @jonathanselassie5502 6 лет назад

    Wooow! Thank You so much for the Encouragement & Inspiration! You blessed me with this!

  • @wallace7131
    @wallace7131 6 лет назад +1

    I really needed to hear this! We put a lot of effort in our music and videos even tho nobody watches them, but still one day they will come and I keep on doing what I love no matter what!

  • @anewloveofficial9137
    @anewloveofficial9137 6 лет назад +4

    Loving yourself is the greatest gift that you can have in your life because even if people treat you as inferior, you know in yourself that criticism could never destruct you because you're a strong woman who knows what she wants in her life.

  • @justinsandolph4861
    @justinsandolph4861 6 лет назад +8

    Well said good job man

  • @hamzaahmed3066
    @hamzaahmed3066 6 лет назад

    I was really depressed but after seeing this I feel a lot better, thanks

  • @wyndts4
    @wyndts4 6 лет назад

    I just watched this video. Instant happiness imitated by people through numerous social media platform

  • @88hyperman
    @88hyperman 6 лет назад +3

    Thanks Tom this helped me out 👍🏽

  • @liamcraddock9539
    @liamcraddock9539 5 лет назад +12

    Just do whatever the hell makes you happy
    *Don't* just do stuff for the sake of impressing people or showing off
    Achievements don't make you a nicer or more deserving person

  • @kentxavier9961
    @kentxavier9961 4 года назад

    One of the simplest yet powerful video. Thank you so much

  • @Cadialvaro
    @Cadialvaro 6 лет назад

    Thanks for making it visible. I feel more relieved and a bit more valuable now. 💛

  • @spiderprime
    @spiderprime 7 лет назад +4

    Damn, I wish I could be like Tom Shillue, he's doing so awesome for himself.

  • @CartooonTHAT
    @CartooonTHAT 7 лет назад +18

    im back again to recharge. thank you for this video!!!! ^^

  • @nsj9509
    @nsj9509 5 лет назад +1

    First video in a while thst I actually really admire. Great video, seriously. Thank you.

  • @Notzri90
    @Notzri90 6 лет назад

    There is wisdom in these videos. All of it is appreciated.

  • @thetriforceknight6281
    @thetriforceknight6281 6 лет назад +4

    Putting effort and trying to be progressive can also go in hand with this. Don't slack of in trying to reach 'Your' major goals being business, physical, emotional, etc. Try one small goal at a time, that will lead to the major one and help build self confidence. Not doing so, might bring you back into comparing yourself to those who did put the effort and were successful. The road to happiness is also rough, full of bumps and pot holes, but don't give up, push on.

  • @mindsstalker
    @mindsstalker 4 года назад +3

    "... and Tom Shillue's wife and kids.", You nailed it! Everyone has their own treasure already.

  • @Kanal7Indonesia
    @Kanal7Indonesia 4 года назад +1

    Yes! ONLY compare yourself NOW to yourself THEN! You're doing OKAY!

  • @zeea6507
    @zeea6507 5 лет назад

    Awesome video thanks for sharing. Growing up with a cousin 2 weeks older than me, we were constantly compared to each other very draining as I got older I realized the effect of this and then was comparing myself to others especially with social media Instagram, snapchat, Facebook etc it never ends. Now I have taken a break from social media and having more peace and contentment. This is a big problem in today’s society learning to do my best and only compare myself to myself. I have achieved great things but find myself chasing the next thing learning to slow down, accept and be content with myself going to be 29 soon and already achieved so much I am happy and grateful to God. I want my own life only better love that!!!

  • @stanford9106
    @stanford9106 7 лет назад +6

    I genuinely am happy being me. I don't look at anyone else and wish I had their life. not everyone is like that, but I am just happy being me

    • @E2Moto
      @E2Moto 7 лет назад +7

      More power to you, and I wish I learned this lesson a long time ago and respected my strengths and weaknesses. I'm currently in the process of rebuilding myself.

    • @JaysonT1
      @JaysonT1 7 лет назад +1

      Stan Ford I wish I could be like you.

    • @stanford9106
      @stanford9106 7 лет назад +1

      Jayson T thank you for saying that. I have learned how to be happy based on the true teachings of the Bible. Nothing in life could make me happier than knowing that Jehovah is with me. If you would like to know more, please reply :-)

  • @sdraid8458
    @sdraid8458 7 лет назад +56

    Best video of PragerU

    • @Wilsontripplets
      @Wilsontripplets 6 лет назад +1

      chris anderson I disagree with most of their videos this one is not half bad we should compare our lives to other people by only as much as we need to. To see what if he people have is what motivates us to get better yes that can harm us but everything in moderation including moderation

    • @Wilsontripplets
      @Wilsontripplets 5 лет назад

      @@AD-nv6jt so where do you disagree if at all with me, I would want to know.

  • @akawave
    @akawave 5 лет назад

    Somthing I kind of knew but needed to hear again. And you nailed it! You rock!

  • @lscanlon9908
    @lscanlon9908 5 лет назад

    When I think about what "comparing myself to others" entails, it basically boils down to hierarchy. I'm comparing myself to others because I want to know whether or not they sit higher on the ladder than I do. It turns out that competing for higher rungs on a ladder is a zero-sum game, and it's all based on obtaining the approval of others. The zero-sum aspect of it leads to self-sabotaging negativity, and the approval-seeking leads to a fundamentally dissatisfying, disingenuous lifestyle.
    Thanks for the great content!