Letting love go 💔

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  • Опубликовано: 10 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 884

  • @lauraluwho8045
    @lauraluwho8045 11 месяцев назад +462

    This advice is true outside of marriage. Commitment and choosing to love and finding ways to love and appreciate is also an amazing process. We need to normalize the struggle in growth as well. Marriage is a marathon and a journey.

    • @Stephanie-di7qy
      @Stephanie-di7qy 10 месяцев назад +9

      Correct, I'm marriage there is no giving up for pettiness. We made a covenant with Adonai and the person that we would be there during the good and bad times. 💯

    • @lauraluwho8045
      @lauraluwho8045 10 месяцев назад +2

      @Stephanie-di7qy Amen in Jesus name.❤️🙏

    • @seolsoojeong59
      @seolsoojeong59 10 месяцев назад +1

      Correct..!❤

    • @maradiaz4609
      @maradiaz4609 9 месяцев назад +3

      Yes you are right when u say ‘advice is true outside of marriage’. I agree 100% ❤

    • @mariyastoyanova9116
      @mariyastoyanova9116 9 месяцев назад

      Yes

  • @user-fe6ci8hn3h
    @user-fe6ci8hn3h 20 дней назад +38

    It's common for relationships to encounter obstacles, but there is always a solution. My own marriage faced considerable issues, but with appropriate guidance, my husband and I worked through them and deepened our connection. Solutions are achievable if you're ready to work together. Stay hopeful-there's always a way forward.

    • @JoyceB.Schlueter
      @JoyceB.Schlueter 20 дней назад

      I'm facing significant relationship problems and can't stand the idea of losing him. My love and longing for my partner are profound, and I'm ready to do anything to restore our connection. I would greatly appreciate any advice or help you could give.

    • @user-fe6ci8hn3h
      @user-fe6ci8hn3h 20 дней назад

      Parting with someone you love is always a challenging process, but in my experience, I had the guidance of a spiritual guide who prevented my marriage from collapsing. His name is Father Akunna.

    • @JoyceB.Schlueter
      @JoyceB.Schlueter 20 дней назад

      I'II quickly search for him online. Thank you.
      I'm optimistic that taking this approach will yield results for me as well; his absence is keenly felt.

    • @user-fe6ci8hn3h
      @user-fe6ci8hn3h 20 дней назад

      I promise you will not regret it.

    • @JoyceB.Schlueter
      @JoyceB.Schlueter 20 дней назад

      I just searched for Father Akunna online. impressive thank you so much one again ❤

  • @jeanine6328
    @jeanine6328 Год назад +13

    I just can’t get past how beautiful his eyes are.

  • @NadiaDakroub
    @NadiaDakroub Год назад +708

    So disappointed in this advice, especially if kids are involved. Start dating again, try again. It CAN come back. Relationships are always a work in progress, valleys and hills. You can go back to love again.. Unless the relationship is toxic or dangerous, then it can be salvaged. Hate can turn back into love with effort.

    • @dracoac4227
      @dracoac4227 Год назад +38

      Thank youuu. This whole use people for a need generation is getting old

    • @momiji7789
      @momiji7789 Год назад +22

      Agree. Growth should be a personal journey. Learn FROM EVERYTHING around you. It shouldn't be your spouse's job. They're probably also learning, chances are you're in the same stage in life! That's why you pool together what you learned and face the world as a team. Crazy reasoning he gave! He's describing a codependent relationship or whatever it's called.

    • @iamtaliba.divine.love1322
      @iamtaliba.divine.love1322 Год назад +11

      How can one “let Love go!?” Love is the very essence of Who We Are! What we can do is let the person(s) go and keep loving them from a different space and place. ❤️‍🩹🙏🏽

    • @beesknees213
      @beesknees213 Год назад +29

      This advice is wise. Just because you ARE together doesn't mean your relationship IS together. I lived it. My mother was in an abusive relationship. When her husband died I couldn't shed ONE tear. Still haven't......

    • @NadiaDakroub
      @NadiaDakroub Год назад +10

      @@beesknees213
      That's different. That's toxic, abusive.

  • @ligiasoaresrodrigues9685
    @ligiasoaresrodrigues9685 Год назад +1

    Thank you for your precious message, i m been harrassed now n then, n manipulating me , to take advantage of my humbleness. Thank you for posting this message, my favorite VODAFONE. God bless you.

  • @nb1393
    @nb1393 Год назад +82

    Long relationship go through different stages that doesn’t mean you have to stop when you at a stage that do not serve you right now. Patience in a relationship is very important. We need to stop encouraging people leaving when they don’t feel as happier as they used to. That’s marriage, people want long lasting marriage but are not willing to do what it takes. As long as it is not abusive then it’s ok, and it’s NORMAL to go through those stages, even for several month. You need to adjust all the time with your partner, it’s not easy to grow with somebody it requires a lot of patience, trust, selflessness to do that. Stop searching for imidiate pleasure and happiness.

    • @deanaburnham9571
      @deanaburnham9571 10 месяцев назад

      Yes!

    • @simpleliving4205
      @simpleliving4205 6 месяцев назад

      100 percent facts

    • @112jful
      @112jful 6 месяцев назад

      @nb1393 I really needed to hear this at this exact moment in time. Thank you for saying this, exactly how you said it. I think it just shifted my entire line of thinking from something that’s been soo mentally and physically draining for the last month with what I have going on in my own relationship.

    • @Kluvuluv
      @Kluvuluv 4 месяца назад

      Well said. ❤

    • @trinityp8575
      @trinityp8575 Месяц назад

      So I had to force myself to sleep with my husband when I totally lost my love for him? To stay while dying inside? I wouldn’t advise that to my children. Sometimes marriage break apart - people stop loving the other as a lover. Being lovers is important in marriage otherwise we can just be brother and sister. I love him as a brother but not as a man. Sorry.

  • @frrrrrr116
    @frrrrrr116 Год назад +2

    Mr. Jay
    You talk calmer in (orange)loud in orange 🍊 😂😂😂😂😂 have a happy day me in orange 🍊 🎉🎉🎉 your teaching me....

  • @clemily5898
    @clemily5898 Год назад +35

    If you are not growing together chances are each of you individually aren't growing. The biggest killer of a relationship is lazy & selfishness. It's not about what am I getting out of this but what are we giving to this relationship. It's a garden, it must be cultivated & maintained. It's not my job to inspire you, you have to choose to be committed & motivated. You should seek counseling on your own if not together before letting go

  • @Utu-qi3mk
    @Utu-qi3mk Год назад +56

    😮oh dear Jay… sometimes it’s not possible to rekindle.., but ending a marriage is a huge loss in a life… don’t throw in the towel too lightly.., years together may lead to staleness… but that can often be overcome… I would caution ⚠️ you to Not give up too lightly.. without sincere effort to renew - revive - Re inspire first… 🙏🏻

    • @anooshaaliya7354
      @anooshaaliya7354 Год назад +1

      But happiness comes first

    • @dlandrews1
      @dlandrews1 Год назад +5

      ⁠No God and salvation comes first. People today are too selfish!

    • @Anniepat2340
      @Anniepat2340 5 месяцев назад +2

      I’m sure Jay means after both parties have tried everything. Sometimes one person is selfish and doesn’t let the other person grow and be free to be themselves. You should not stay in a relationship if someone is holding you back. Because that’s just selfishness and no one deserves that.
      You only have one life, live it! The other person does not control your life, you do what’s right for yourself… no one should be deciding how you live your life and if they can’t grow with you and honor you, then you are only hurting yourself. That is not fair.

  • @funkekehinde6827
    @funkekehinde6827 Год назад +163

    Part of the commitment to relationship is to sit down and reevaluate those standards with a view to working on improvements. But where a party isn't willing, then it's ok to let go.

  • @navywoman7709
    @navywoman7709 11 месяцев назад

    Right on! Face the facts, let go false hope and take action, looking forward in a positive way. 👍🏻

  • @spl8017
    @spl8017 Год назад +268

    People these days are more committed to their boss/careers/jobs than they are to their partner/family/ marriage. So sad.

    • @ladyofspa
      @ladyofspa Год назад +4

      🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

    • @ladyofspa
      @ladyofspa Год назад

      My mission passion projects driving force workout regime. Anything but a simple hey this works let's make it easy.

    • @TrustNotMyHeart
      @TrustNotMyHeart Год назад +2

      You are sooo on point

    • @theshield1613
      @theshield1613 Год назад

      No wonder cheating and divorces has skyrocketed

    • @Smaugette
      @Smaugette Год назад +3

      Video games. These boys never grow up.

  • @navrandhawa7340
    @navrandhawa7340 Год назад +1

    Truth hurts...and is painful to leave someone after so long but
    he's right!!

  • @MelissaJean143
    @MelissaJean143 Год назад +4

    ABSOLUTELY, OTHERWISE IT'S I'M LIVING IN DENIAL AND OR THE HUMAN FEAR OF CHANGE. ITS """healthy and healing*" when you do let go and live to love,honor and respect your own selves long-term health and happiness!!❤. Speaking from experience

  • @coretaclark3104
    @coretaclark3104 Год назад +2

    U PREACHING NOW!!!

  • @reinaprada2127
    @reinaprada2127 Год назад +66

    I forced, and forced, and forced a relationship where I was the only one “interested” or committed. I love this short video, because for 4 years I was living a sad and non meaningful life, just because my perception about marriage was that it had to last forever… it was not working, and I was the only one trying to “fix” it. My husband was not interested. I love him so much, but I also need to remember the love to myself. We are friends now… he knows I love him, but I know he doesn’t want to stay married (at least with me). I took me a long run to notice and accept that reality… but I agree with you. “We need to normalize it a little bit.” ❤

    • @Adilogy227
      @Adilogy227 Год назад +6

      But I am still struggling...dear it's been 7 yrs and finally where I find myself is heart problems panic attack, so negetive and so depressing...and m stuck in it. Help me god. He is with his friends and family enjoy, visiting new places..now what he use to say you are so negetive person just stay away....but the fact is before when I found him he was negetive, drunk and helpless he ask for help me to take out of everything...i did ,I was so committed 😢😢😢😢but my everything drained upon him gave him love,care good advice and helped him emotionally, financial,and physically now I have nothing even I can't find myself who I am what I am doing....he disrespects me each and every day but I am running to him....he says I am crazy 😢😢😢mad and so disgusting words. I lost myself in this 7 yrs....😢😢😢😢😢pray for me

    • @vive928
      @vive928 Год назад +1

      Me too. Lost good 10 years.. still in the stupid marriage.. wasted life

    • @reinaprada2127
      @reinaprada2127 Год назад +3

      ⁠@@Adilogy227🥺 little by little you have to reconnect with yourself. I know it’s easier to say it… but you must try. It takes time and a lot of effort to remember who we are ❤… to return to love!

    • @elrisitas1927
      @elrisitas1927 10 месяцев назад +1

      ​@Adilogy227 You can start life from zero , build everything from the ground up , you don't deserve pain for a man ! ( Not so great man Im sure )

  • @sc-bj2fs
    @sc-bj2fs Год назад +2

    The relationship is between them ,not everyone. Stay out of other people's lives. If they want the relationship, it's for them to determine.

  • @priscilagoncalves5341
    @priscilagoncalves5341 Год назад +1

    I totally agree with him. After 11 sad years in my previous relationship, I finally got the courage to leave. There’s no point of staying if you are miserable all the time. Sometimes, there’s nothing to fix. We did remain good friends though.

  • @nishaknowsbest7484
    @nishaknowsbest7484 Год назад +126

    A lot of growth and self reflection can happen when you stay in a long term committed relationship/ marriage. Going from person to person or being alone doesn’t necessarily give you that depth of reflection.

    • @sd3564
      @sd3564 11 месяцев назад +13

      But being in a toxic unhealthy relationship just for self reflection is very deadly

    • @ashanidafra5053
      @ashanidafra5053 8 месяцев назад

      Lol

    • @trinityp8575
      @trinityp8575 Месяц назад +1

      It’s not about going from relationship to relationship. But being ok with the fact that people can grow apart, nothing lasts forever and nothing is guaranteed in this life. And marriages do break apart and you can have a second chance and try again :)

  • @lahongwan4440
    @lahongwan4440 Год назад

    Agree with your great advice Jay thank you for sharing this with me 🙏🙏❤️

  • @jodibaggett4506
    @jodibaggett4506 11 месяцев назад

    always great to hear your truth, Jay.

  • @toejay
    @toejay Год назад +2

    The devil can make evil sound good. Sick

  • @macarenagonzalez8381
    @macarenagonzalez8381 Год назад +57

    It is NOT ok to let love go!! Love is not only a feeling, is a decision. Love is more important than happiness….and love for sure will bring deep overwhelming happiness and peace in long term.

    • @MONEYFLIPPMEDIA
      @MONEYFLIPPMEDIA Год назад +4

      It has to be revived and worked on... success is just like life - its what you make it

    • @Saxology219
      @Saxology219 Год назад +3

      Nah… some ppl are just enduring love. Not enjoying it. You can love someone and not be in a relationship with them.

    • @trinityp8575
      @trinityp8575 Месяц назад

      @@MONEYFLIPPMEDIAI tried to revive it but couldn’t. I felt sick sleeping with him. It felt like torture doing something with someone you don’t love or want. I don’t believe love can be brought back if it’s totally gone. Sometimes we marry someone who later we realise we grew totally apart. It happens. I don’t want to force myself. I can love him as someone close or like a relative but can’t love him like a man. Sorry. I will not sleep with someone I don’t want to. Just because I have to because someone on the internet said it has to be revived.

  • @saidali5894
    @saidali5894 Год назад +1

    I swear it is the whole truth and nothing but the truth. It's healthy that way

  • @usman1995ful
    @usman1995ful Год назад +4

    Well the problem with that is that it's never mutual and it comes out of a place where one person thinks he can find someone better and that's why he leaves. Hurting the whole family just because he wants to look for someone better.

  • @evangelinemirwani2943
    @evangelinemirwani2943 Год назад +15

    No matter how long to measure the length of your relationship if you're not meant to each other, destiny will gind the way to set you apart,

  • @me_ayushigupta
    @me_ayushigupta 24 дня назад +1

    Learn, inspire, Grow

  • @interestingthings6409
    @interestingthings6409 Год назад +93

    This is good advice if you’re just dating someone, but not for marriage. Spouses need to try a little harder to get along before they throw in the towel

    • @monique-y6o
      @monique-y6o 11 месяцев назад +2

      I agree to a point. Otherwise what’s the point of ever getting married in the first place?🤍🕊️🙏🏼

    • @mineandmine4528
      @mineandmine4528 11 месяцев назад +1

      What about infidelity? What about threats of violence? Is that a reason to try to keep the marriage?

    • @interestingthings6409
      @interestingthings6409 11 месяцев назад

      @@mineandmine4528 those are extreme circumstances. A lot of the time, couples just don’t try hard enough, don’t compromise, don’t sacrifice. Of course, if there is real abuse or violence, it’s a real problem, but small things should break up a marriage

    • @lisaraper8053
      @lisaraper8053 10 месяцев назад

      @@mineandmine4528 these are scriptural reasons for divorce. But too often most marriages end from complacency not abuse or adultery. Walking away because your wife got sick is not good. She deserves better. Abuse, walk! Adultery, it’s up to you but forgive for yourself. Not them.

    • @sd7785
      @sd7785 9 месяцев назад +1

      Why? Marriage doesn't indicate anything about the strength or health of a relationship.

  • @rosiemusser
    @rosiemusser Год назад

    Amen!! ♥️❤️♥️ So sad to hear people say they are staying in a toxic situation for the kids. Do you even realize or know, what you are even doing to the kids? It’s called a lot of unnecessary emotional trauma. This game of life is about learning and growing. All of us!! Self love is so important, yet so under taught. Namaste. ⚔️♥️⚔️

  • @anusharhoda2342
    @anusharhoda2342 Год назад +24

    Its difficult to let go. After a long term relationship you are habituated to the person and there would be a lot of emotional dependency. Letting go will break us, also if your partner is not on the same page as you are.. Its gonna be painful.

    • @Venus-gn5oi
      @Venus-gn5oi Год назад +6

      Staying in a continuous unhealthy situation is going to break you even more and deplete you of your energy. Breaking out might fell like breaking you at first but you have the opportunity to evolve and grow and be happy again. It depends what you prefer. Prolonged suffering for the sake of being with someone or limited suffering and experiencing freedom and joy of life again 🤷🏻‍♀️

    • @naturalista123
      @naturalista123 Год назад +1

      ​@@Venus-gn5oi as the person above said. Letting go is hard. I've said I was done about 100 times now and I've gon back everytime. One day I'll have the strength 😢

    • @Venus-gn5oi
      @Venus-gn5oi Год назад +3

      That’s why is important to love yourself without anyone loving you. That’s how you recognize that you deserve better and are able to draw a clear line and say no to anyone and anything that is not treating you right. I wish you strength and love ❤️

    • @nexusn568
      @nexusn568 Год назад +2

      Why stay if you're not happy in the relationship...

  • @branavasorubysivabalaratna7819
    @branavasorubysivabalaratna7819 Год назад +2

    He was once a monk. So disappointing. Always be contented in 3 things of this world. Your partner. The food you eat and the wealth. Always be discontented in your spiritual growth. It is not always about growing growing growing. It is about giving giving giving.

  • @shalinisinghchinya
    @shalinisinghchinya Год назад +56

    I totally agree, if things can’t get better even after trying it’s better to stop the toxic cycle!! I am so glad and happy for your encouraging words. Thank you 🙂

  • @user-iu6bv8vu8o
    @user-iu6bv8vu8o Год назад

    GREAT HONEST & BEST ADVICE ON THE SUBJECT!!!💯💯💯💯

  • @AgataSpina-y8l
    @AgataSpina-y8l 10 месяцев назад

    Very true i was with someone for 15 years and i finally opened my eyes that it wasn’t going no where so i had to cut the cord and move on its never to late to open your eyes God gives you a person and he can also take it away from you and i believe in that don’t ever settle

  • @Mr.Honest247
    @Mr.Honest247 Год назад +144

    There’s something that feels so wrong about not being with someone just because you’re not continuing to grow together. It may sound positive but it feels like someone is letting that self help success make it ALL THEY SEE and that life can’t just be about something else sometimes. Self help feels like a new addiction that blinds people into only participating in success and anything else = negatively judge or positively abandon them. Meaning nice words but mean actions. It’s a toxicity in and of itself and I can feel it in its vibe.

    • @buoyanta3372
      @buoyanta3372 Год назад +5

      I've heard here more about not forcing someone to stay where he(she) is not happy and fulfilled. It might be very discouraging at first sight but the unit you create should bring something very good to both sides. There's no way we can save marriages if don't look at this challenge as clear as we can.
      I personally would recommend to do everything you can in the present relationship to make it work not just survive. Although periods of endurance are inevitable.
      I hear you speak out of fear. I've been there and learned a lot to become better. Now I'm creating a new relationship and say some things from the start. If we don't create and support openness, trust, sensuality, respect and a few other vital things it won't flourish. We are usually afraid of that 'greener grass' elsewhere. Why don't we become 'greener'? And the best way is when you become better for your partner and so does he/she. I have been blessed to experience that and very grateful. And when you live like that it makes just a huge difference in 5-10 years. The disappointment will come when you see couples managing to do so while you try to just bear yours. It will be devastating. I will never ever let things be as they are, only working for the better, cause it pays off. You get used to that little steps that make a huge difference over time.

    • @FR-zz2bj
      @FR-zz2bj Год назад

      Hundred percent agreed

    • @FR-zz2bj
      @FR-zz2bj Год назад +1

      This self help often is destructive

    • @sarakonjo434
      @sarakonjo434 Год назад

      it sounds positive but very toxic advice. Poison with sugar on top. When the serpent in the Bible advised Eve, it did sound good, but we all know that one mistake coursed generational curse.

  • @anp730
    @anp730 11 месяцев назад

    AMEN!! The truth be told. 💖

  • @--xx--5800
    @--xx--5800 Год назад +181

    I don't agree with Jay here. I think this is the most awful advice. Leaving someone just because you are bored of her/him is a terrible thing to do. Then where will be our accountability and reliability!!!! Where will be the constitution of marriage!!!
    I have seen some people who gets bored of a person so quickly and they changes their partners every month even after nothing wrong from their partner's side. It hurts the other side invariably. Is it the right thing do !!!!
    People can learn & grow separately even after being together also .

    • @nilzaamo
      @nilzaamo Год назад +8

      He didn't said.... Tht you let go of love when uh get bored.... He said its better to let go... When uh both stop growing together... Which is important for both

    • @priyadsilva4582
      @priyadsilva4582 Год назад +10

      Finally the comment I was looking for ... U DON'T let go of a relationship just because you are not growing in that relationship. It's a relationship not a career to look for growth every time. It is for better or for worse. In sickness and health for rich or for poor

    • @buoyanta3372
      @buoyanta3372 Год назад +2

      My advice is to start looking from the systemic point more. Otherwise it becomes a demand or a speculation.
      Ok, here we start. You should save the marriage, be accountable even in poverty. Now what if your spouse is not trying for whatever reason? Doesn't respect you, gradually moves down or spoils it all. Now you have to love him/her? And be with him/her? In my opinion, the desire to be with a person should be natural, not forced. We can only deepen the problem by trying to persuade and compel. And it usually comes to the unhealthy place where someone is burdened for another's feeling safe. Or both are tired and drained, become shallow, etc. So, the norms created by society for marriage have become toxic, not working. So the whole situation needs to be reorganized. Which is what we do now.
      If you decide to stand on the claims and demands you will only replay the whole cycle again. And still come to this point: what do we do to save marriages and deep relationships as such? Now everyone is free and it might be better to see clearly what someone is up for. So you can choose and start building relationships with people who want the same and value you enough.

    • @acuerdo3
      @acuerdo3 Год назад +3

      Marriage requires work. Real work. It is normal to grow apart and it requires work to stay together and grow closer. I do not know any marriage that hasn’t required work on both parties.
      I agree that this video is disappointing.

    • @irenagough1014
      @irenagough1014 Год назад +4

      He's a snakr oil salesman. His advice is nonsense. He hadn't lived long enough to experience a long marriage. My parents were married for 76 and my mom is still alive!! Bad advice.!!

  • @nikkiboo7719
    @nikkiboo7719 Год назад +1

    That's right. So many people have wasted their lives just because they are too afraid to start all over again and live their life in their own terms. Of course, they do that "for the shake of their children" and "because marriage takes effort". The truth is they have just settled for less and they put the responsibility of their life on other people. It's easier to find excuses than taking action and step out of your comfort zone (no matter how much uncomfort it has become).

  • @tweetyhm2416
    @tweetyhm2416 8 месяцев назад

    Thank you for spreading your wisdom

  • @susanperla9777
    @susanperla9777 Год назад +5

    It’s very easy to let go when we think we aren’t getting anything good from a relationship but from the beginning our minds need to be set on “What am I bringing into the relationship?”. Now hold on! I know we hear this often but hear me out, everyday we have to nurture our relationships. Yes, some days may be harder than others but even if you can only muster a “thank you”, “I love you” or “I am praying for you” it builds up to a beautiful harvest.
    A lasting relationship is build on two people putting in work. There will be days when one is putting more than the other but it doesn’t stay like that for long. Keep praying and keep nurturing the relationship because that’s what will encourage your partner to do the same. Especially in married couples. Man cannot separate what was brought together by God 🙏. God does care about our relationships and the secret is to include God and nothing will be able to separate what God is holding together 🙏

  • @jeanlee2235
    @jeanlee2235 Год назад +57

    This is sad. Divorce has become so common and too many people rush into relationships. To leave just because you're bored is wrong. Find ways to keep it exciting! Its not easier to meet someone new and do it all over again.

    • @SN-ec1xi
      @SN-ec1xi 10 месяцев назад +1

      Truly... Growth is individual ..this is bulshit and such stupid idea that there must learning from other person... Learning is from life and experience... Why to burden someone that I should learn from you..

    • @Lebensbaustein
      @Lebensbaustein 10 месяцев назад +2

      ​@@SN-ec1xiit sounds like Jay Shetty is about to get a divorce.

    • @robinlooney5440
      @robinlooney5440 10 месяцев назад

      Divorce is hard enough people don't divorce because they are bored. All to often people stay in a marriage for convenience and stability. All the while tolerating disrespectful behavior cheating, lying, financial control or narcissistic control.

    • @deanaburnham9571
      @deanaburnham9571 10 месяцев назад

      @@robinlooney5440 I think he's not talking about abusive toxic relationships where one spouse is a narcissistic or dangerously messing with your mind as a predator. He's talking I think, and I could be wrong, about people who are bored or want something, someone new. Commitment isn't his goal here. I think this is not even accepted by Hindus which is his religion I believe.
      Jay doesn't seem to agree that without sacrifice there is no real love

    • @hereforyou1305
      @hereforyou1305 5 месяцев назад

      If effort is coming from one side only it's even sadder ....u just end up exhausting yourself to the point you start feeling worthless

  • @gcjpoulin
    @gcjpoulin 10 месяцев назад

    I believe this is true even within marriage. I’ve finally let go of 28 year marriage as it became toxic. External forces can’t be helped sometimes no matter what you do! Especially when children are involved and knowing when it’s time to move on! Healthier mindset! Great advice!

  • @bbisawake337
    @bbisawake337 Год назад +1

    If there are children involved “love” isn’t the be all and end all

  • @RanjithRanjith-cb6ju
    @RanjithRanjith-cb6ju Год назад

    Absolutely true 👍👌🙌💯, what I learnt from the relationship people get tired 😫 starts with so much love, and then what happened other person totally forgotten 😢 that's what happened to me, 😢😢😢😢, you must let go, but I never did trying hanging there, now its over but still we keeping touch ❤

  • @arianaw4989
    @arianaw4989 Год назад +101

    I feel so bad for his wife. With this sort of mentality the moment she goes through a period in her life when she isn’t inspiring to him, or nurturing his growth, she is now disposable. In marriage BOTH of you will experience seasons when you are not those things. Life is full of trials and heavy seasons. That is when you need your spouse the most to uplift you and carry you through it, or carry each other in the moment if it affects both of you. Having a partner that loves you, and allows you to step back and be vulnerable or even weak, in a season is a blessing in marriage. It is the essence of a partnership. I got you when you don’t got yourself.

    • @greengoblin9567
      @greengoblin9567 Год назад

      He is just enabling women to dump their partner. “Getting bored” is not the reason most men break up, instead they are tired of their girlfriend encroaching on their boundaries. Women will encroach more and more as time progresses until it becomes unbearable.

    • @Kayleigh-h2m
      @Kayleigh-h2m 11 месяцев назад +2

      Okay then stay with that horrible person , but don’t encourage people to be unhappy cause you refuse to move forward

    • @Mizzpinkperfect
      @Mizzpinkperfect 11 месяцев назад +3

      That’s not what he saying it was someone who was married they said for 60 years and what do we normally do wow that’s so amazing and beautiful 🥳🎉🎉💕 but in reality the
      Quality of their relationship wasn’t nothing to celebrate they were just married. He was cheating on her constantly had a child on her abandoned that child she had to endure a lot of abuse and infidelity just to be with him for those 60 years that wasn’t a quality relationship to be celebrated that wasn’t a relationship that should have lasted that long. She should have stood up for herself and left . Like Tina Turner said what love got to do with it. When your with someone just to say your with someone that’s a low quality relationship

    • @mineandmine4528
      @mineandmine4528 11 месяцев назад +1

      @greengoblin9567,
      He is also enabling men to do the same.

    • @MomOfThree_333
      @MomOfThree_333 11 месяцев назад

      This comment 👌👏❤

  • @maureenhayes2894
    @maureenhayes2894 Год назад +18

    I agree. People brag about lengh of their marriage, when there was infidelity, etc. Just stay for the security. They are afraid of being single! And face being alone.😢

    • @christinacanto3740
      @christinacanto3740 11 месяцев назад +2

      Or maybe they’ve mastered forgiveness

    • @Loveyloveeeee
      @Loveyloveeeee 11 месяцев назад +3

      @@christinacanto3740most of the time they just don’t want to be considered a failure or be back to being single and financially burdened and what others will think of them. Even though they are unhappy in the marriage because of infidelity or anything else that happened. But inside they are dying slowly

  • @alandonald2385
    @alandonald2385 Год назад +1

    This fool is gone crazy 😂😂😂😂

  • @wellen5336
    @wellen5336 Год назад

    Y E S!!!!💜
    If people can learn how to let go, they’ll be surprised how much more they can grow
    Commitment doesn’t always trump satisfaction and growth

  • @laura.j.schembri5165
    @laura.j.schembri5165 Год назад +13

    AGREE. One hundred percent. So many couples, the woman tries to please everyone but not herself. That is WRONG. EVERYONE NEEDS TO CONTRIBUTE IN A MARRIAGE. That’s a beautiful marriage.

    • @jouisimo5701
      @jouisimo5701 Год назад +2

      i hope u pull the beam out of ur eye😂

    • @taelew
      @taelew 15 дней назад

      Everyone female/women is not meant to be a wife! That’s a women’s role in a marriage/family. If they can’t accept that role, they should’ve never got married.

  • @medhidz1956
    @medhidz1956 Год назад

    So true, even though it is hard to think about or admit it.

  • @PrincessPatricia2013
    @PrincessPatricia2013 28 дней назад +1

    The worst thing about being with someone for a long time - 11 years in this case - is somebody fooling you to think they were in love with you and you invested 11 years of your life and wasted 11 years of your life with this man! He turned around and threw you away to bang someone else who was less than you and asked for less and expected less! I don’t get it! We women invest and want to grow with someone. He faked the whole thing and veered off the shared path and went in another direction! I was supporting him to become a better man but he would rather have just escaped to someone who is fun and games and accepts no commitment! After all of that, how can I be replaced? I loved him. She doesn’t! When will men learn that finding a woman who loves you and supports you to become the best version of you is rare in this world? Why do they just throw you away?

  • @elizabethb.8889
    @elizabethb.8889 Месяц назад

    Best advice I've heard.

  • @natashalaurin4100
    @natashalaurin4100 Год назад +1

    I absolutely agree.😊😊

  • @dr.fatemaomran3105
    @dr.fatemaomran3105 Год назад

    The depth and quality are the most important 👍🏻👍🏻💯💯💯

  • @VishalKumar-wf8mj
    @VishalKumar-wf8mj День назад

    What kind of advice it is , there will always be situation like this it is much more wiser to solve it rather than walking away

  • @irinilewis6049
    @irinilewis6049 Год назад

    I agree, but I like to never give up and u both make it work xxx

  • @yellowwb4183
    @yellowwb4183 11 месяцев назад

    Much needed information 👍🏽

  • @TheAlexuslee
    @TheAlexuslee Год назад

    He’s so beautiful 😍

  • @SalomeIdux
    @SalomeIdux Год назад +1

    Amen thank you

  • @keoshaqshannon-jn3ri
    @keoshaqshannon-jn3ri Год назад +3

    Length,time, distance doesn't measure the value of true love and connection. My longest relationship had the least connection. My shortest situation had the strongest deepest connection

  • @Christian-zt3wh
    @Christian-zt3wh Год назад +181

    I think thats terrible advice because you can learn ways to make things exciting for each other and not just give up because you been together so long and your bored

    • @ruthfrancis7775
      @ruthfrancis7775 Год назад +26

      I agree with him totally! Longevity does not necessarily equate to happiness, quality and depth, common goals, etc.

    • @emilyneilson6554
      @emilyneilson6554 Год назад +15

      It lies somewhere in between....and the decision is more complex than just boredom setting in. Especially where children are involved

    • @anooshaaliya7354
      @anooshaaliya7354 Год назад +5

      But what if things ain't working out even then ...what is a fun of a relationship when it has lost its actual fun tbh

    • @elainecongo3827
      @elainecongo3827 Год назад +12

      IT'S NOT TERRIBLE ADVISE IT'S ONLY TERRIBLE TO A PERSON WHO WANTS TO KEEP TRYING WHEN IT'S BEEN OVER...SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T WORK TOGETHER...IT'S NOT A BAD THING IT'S JUST IS WHAT IT IS

    • @sls4294
      @sls4294 Год назад +7

      He isn't referring to boredom he is referring to one's actually growth spiritual, mentally, physically, emotionally etc.

  • @AK-ut6nn
    @AK-ut6nn Год назад +12

    Sooooo true..... I've been Married for 16 years and all I've got from this relationship is pain and heartbreak. Now I have decided to move on ❤

  • @nightghost4174
    @nightghost4174 Год назад

    Had old friends who wanted to reconnect, but sadly those days are over. Thanks for being there for me when I needed a friend. Personally, I just have to find a different path in life then what we are on. People grow into newer versions of themselves everyday...why can't that be me as well.

  • @jonahcarter196
    @jonahcarter196 11 месяцев назад

    Definitely where I’m at. Completely done with situations and people that make me unhappy and vice versa . If your not happy with me anymore we should be able to move on to find better knowing its okay just a season instead of a lifetime 🤷🏾‍♀️

  • @tejasbodkhe9787
    @tejasbodkhe9787 Год назад +2

    This video is just for me..thanks god u show me this video..i was in relationship with a girl for 7 years..and she forced me to let her go in the name of attachment when she too have the attachments and i was fed up toxic relationship where i was only working and giving love...her negativity her disrespectful nature...i was starting self doubted...but finally i let her go..and now i am trying to move on slowly..

  • @mouansari6700
    @mouansari6700 Год назад +1

    Thank you Jay ..thanks alot!

  • @IntraAwareness
    @IntraAwareness Месяц назад

    Relationships are as rewarding as the effort you put into keeping it alive and growing. If it is stale it is because you are not growing as individuals and therefore your relationship will become dull. If you simply move on to the next one you'll get a hit of pleasure and excitement (which is often confused for love); but you are still you, and the same pattern will repeat itself over and over again. If you are not growing and expanding your mind, body, and spirit it is easy to point to something external and say that is the problem instead of going to the root of the problem.

  • @rhondawoodhouse5508
    @rhondawoodhouse5508 10 месяцев назад

    Spot on! I have seen it be a cheaper to keep her or co dependency existence! Such a waste of time. TAKE NOTE: LIVE FREE OF EMPTY RELATIONSHIPS! BE YPUR OWN CAUSE! ♥️

  • @111icke
    @111icke 19 дней назад

    Thank you!!!! Finally someone who see "dumpers" not as evil ppl. I had to break up after 7 years because he doesn't develop, no interest in anything, no fun, ignores all issues...and then he wants to marry...sorry i had to end this. Even after i ask him to rekindle and work together on our issues he sees no need. Ok.

  • @kika-ge5qr
    @kika-ge5qr Год назад +5

    I love this. It is okay to let 'love' go. Being in love changes after a very long time. That's all. Thank you.🌷

  • @rinnai26infinity
    @rinnai26infinity 5 месяцев назад

    This is so good ❤

  • @janetcoutinho7707
    @janetcoutinho7707 Год назад

    Very well said👍

  • @EmilyGloeggler7984
    @EmilyGloeggler7984 Год назад +1

    The good news is that a mature wise person can end, heal from, and move on from a healthy relationship - as long as they were not engaged or married.

  • @sbartlett-ez3xgAMAZING
    @sbartlett-ez3xgAMAZING Год назад +2

    Many thanks! Wish I knew this much earlier😢

  • @rhondacoleman630
    @rhondacoleman630 Год назад

    Amen . People stay because of kids, houses and 401k accounts . It's ok to admitt you grew apart . I'm divorced after 38 years ...I stayed way to long . While your staying life is going on . As my daughter once told me " mom,you only have one chance at this thing called life .....live! If your doing everything on your own , don't share friends , don't share a bed, are more like roommates.......time to move on ..

  • @jenniferyoung2329
    @jenniferyoung2329 Год назад +11

    Amen…people need to get out when the time comes. Relationships are about personal growth.

  • @teresaramos4689
    @teresaramos4689 5 месяцев назад

    I agree. I’ve seen many people who’ve been married for decades and they’re like look we made it, knowing that their marriages were not happy, maybe they don’t like each other or can’t stand to be around each other, that there was infidelities, children born out of the marriage there’s so many things and everybody knows it and yet here they are celebrating 30 years together 40 years together and it’s not a happy union and it’s like, such a waste of time.

  • @xxxsahi8012
    @xxxsahi8012 Год назад +1

    I've been talking to a guy fir 6 months now and he makes me super insecure to the point where i can't be me and also im scared i won't find anyone like him and no one will like me every again😭what do i do!!
    He literally is a narcissist and goes on taking abt his previous relationship like he still hasnt moved on from his ex

  • @whocanitbenow5368
    @whocanitbenow5368 Год назад

    Very true! ESPECIALLY over 60! 😩

  • @elizabethgraham4928
    @elizabethgraham4928 4 месяца назад

    Damn. He's beautiful

  • @lisafoster3494
    @lisafoster3494 Год назад +1

    I think a better focus is how can i grow, what do I bring to the table how do I make this better? People are too outwardly focused changing partners etc will not bring true change true change comes from within!!!

  • @annettebierkos7928
    @annettebierkos7928 Год назад

    Thank you , I needed to hear tha

  • @norashenert4848
    @norashenert4848 Год назад +8

    Normalize is the key word!! Thank you 🙂

  • @rushibhoi1577
    @rushibhoi1577 Год назад

    Relationship is sweeter then all. Which was the key to live alive comfortably without outer intertainment for poor people. Thanks

  • @nicolepiponides7488
    @nicolepiponides7488 Год назад +3

    The depth and quality of a relationship is not just about inspiring or learning or growing together more, there's so much more once a marriage has solid foundations, connection, friends, 🎉family and work all add to your growth and depth as a couple. The grass is not always greener and it's not always worth connecting elsewhere when in reality you disconnect! .. Trust, peace, love and contentment are truly beautiful commitments too... Trust me after 40 years together, I talk from experience and a good relationship should encompas a lot more we's than I's

  • @dorindahudson4996
    @dorindahudson4996 Год назад +6

    If the connection is not there anymore they time to go your separate ways

  • @Betty-ir2bh
    @Betty-ir2bh 11 месяцев назад

    I wish I was with him for a long time. I want forever. His eyes are to die for. Too damn gorgeous❤🎉

  • @lauriefaasua8777
    @lauriefaasua8777 Год назад +43

    Terrible Advice!!!! Letting go of love tears apart families! There is ALWAYS room to grow together …..
    I am Funeral Arranger…..and I witness everyday the commitment to enduring Love from people who have stayed together for 40,50,60 years……
    And this is not the advice they give!!

  • @lovedembags7008
    @lovedembags7008 Год назад

    Wow!! There's alot of people here that stays being together even if theres no more love..that's so sad! 😢 Also it's not always about "letting go" like leaving...sometimes letting go is "giving up" so staying in a loveless marriage and not doing anything to improve or not trying to work on something, is as good as letting go...you're still there but you've already "given up" 😢 Work on that love everyday, don't stay and NOT do anything about it❤

  • @jessical6633
    @jessical6633 Год назад +13

    A relationship doesn’t have to last to be considered successful. Love this 🙏♥️

  • @cameronlamb1869
    @cameronlamb1869 11 месяцев назад +1

    Bro got hypergamised and tried to convince himself it was a good thing to cope with the pain she left him with

  • @yvonnedelories4780
    @yvonnedelories4780 Год назад +5

    I love this man like FAMILY! He's the TRUTH!

  • @miclaguna949-ho1yn
    @miclaguna949-ho1yn Год назад +3

    Sometimes ,people are in relationships to maintain a certain image.. it's quite selfish, And it's very non-realistic thinking, a fantasy, way of thinking.. people who marry people who make them look good.. the relationship itself is only transactional.. no real love ,or human connection..
    These type of people, would have kids together, and stay married for a long time too. Constantly , and emotionally invalidating each other, and gaslighting each other behind closed doors, and then only loving each other, pretending to be people they aren't, in front of people they don't know very well, or personally, just to maintain a certain image.. put on a show, seem more important, better, and above others etc. Just passing down their horrible genetics from one generation to the next..
    There are a lot of people in relationships like this, all types of ages.
    This behavior normally happens within narcissistic, and co-dependent relationships.. families, with mental illness, alcoholics, drug users, etc.
    And it can happen to anyone, no matter what your background is, where you grew up.
    Poor, or rich, No one is singled out. Its the real deal man.. some scary sh**. The whole thing is mental... 😧

  • @mishka8559
    @mishka8559 Год назад

    Thank you for saying this....thank you!

  • @The_real_hardik
    @The_real_hardik Год назад +1

    This struck me👌💯

  • @ejatudiallo9210
    @ejatudiallo9210 Год назад +31

    Once we are growing together, we keep loving each other.

  • @brianmonahan3097
    @brianmonahan3097 Год назад +317

    Terrible advice. I usually enjoy his comments. Not today!
    Stop!
    End the pattern of divorce. You won’t find long term happiness by thinking in short term needs.
    Take responsibility to rekindle your love. Don’t need immediate reciprocity.
    Trust committing to change WITH your spouse will eventually bring about the change.
    The grass isn’t greener.
    Trust that love, loyalty, perseverance and FAITH, will make you unstoppable.
    Go be that instrument of change!

    • @jayasankarpanicker9328
      @jayasankarpanicker9328 Год назад +14

      Yes you're correct....This generation wants everything quick, and as a result disposing of love is normalized. But as jay said, it might make sense to some other individuals...each to his own... there's many different ways to look at it. So yeah, let's be considerate of everyone's opinions.

    • @claricestar47
      @claricestar47 Год назад +1

      Agreed!

    • @vandanagupta4036
      @vandanagupta4036 Год назад

      Totally Agree

    • @spl8017
      @spl8017 Год назад

      Agree

    • @toddstone9727
      @toddstone9727 Год назад +21

      At no point did he mention marriage or divorce.

  • @xieqqia
    @xieqqia 11 месяцев назад

    yes, the quality and depth is more matter, it’s the degree that each one can be committed in this relationship

  • @skincarerainbow4950
    @skincarerainbow4950 11 месяцев назад +1

    No, we need to normalise working together and staying IN the relationship. Unless someone is abusive , do not leave your relationship

  • @KojLok-dy6gp
    @KojLok-dy6gp 5 месяцев назад +7

    Wow, and sadly, people will take advice from this guy.