Some things like management just ruin jobs that would otherwise be fine. The constant anxiety of not being caught not doing anything (because there is genuinely nothing to do) and being constantly told off for talking to colleagues and not working every minute of the shift is just honestly burning everyone out. It's like you can never stop and just relax
I am a manager and I let my team do absolutely shit or nothing or whatever they want, sit down, read a book...nah..they compain they'd like to work more and they're bored if they dont...plz shoot me in the head :)
yeah, it certainly is the worst part of what David Graeber coined as a "bs job" - one that might have not needed to exist as a separate role in the first place due to the delegated task being too minute to not be performed by already hired employees, but is supervised on some level nonetheless just because the person in the position is getting paid.
I've come to a point of burnout where I'd literally rather drop tf dead or go play in traffic on a highway than participate in the labor market. I don't know if it even can be fixed. I honestly believe that my 20+ years in customer service (while never having enough money to survive, so having to overwork myself regularly) has permanently broken me.
definitely feel that I have no idea how people are meant to work until they retire without having multiple mental breakdowns... burnout seems to be becoming the new norm that's somehow acceptable unfortunately :(
The problem is u spent 20 years in customer service when most people that’s a starter job and quickly realize there is no future or possible moving up from customer service, it’s a trap job mostly for young people designed to keep you in the dark. Always move up never stagnant. Standing water is bad, but a flowing river brings all kinds of possibilities. Quit on the spot give your boss the finger stand up for yourself and leave if your unhappy, just do it.
Many of us in all different fields feel this way. Jobs suck. They all do. It’s just about finding a job that sucks the least. Usually it takes 2-4 different jobs (big point: not 2-4 jobs in the same field, but 2-4 DIFFERENT jobs) to find something that sucks the least.
@@tylerjackson7948 kindoff agree, I have done servicedesk as a starter in IT than discovered how miserable helldesk roles were and just ran to another role in IT as fast as I could.
@@tylerjackson7948 Bro I work in bedside healthcare and it's customer service on top of the ever growing threats of litigation as well as the loss of your livelihood thru losing your practicing license as well as being responsible for making sure that your patients dont expire. It's double the stress. I remember when I used to do customer service and I HATED it idk why I even got here
For me personally, management is the #1 deciding factor on whether I like a workplace or not. I've been micromanaged, abused, mistreated by managers too many times now.
Like myself before, I think a lot of people don’t take inventory of their experiences and what they are looking for. I worked a ton of different jobs in different fields and found one thing, I wasn’t passionate about them. Once I made peace that a job doesn’t have to be for passion but was tolerable enough to do so I can focus on actual passions it helped me alot
Thissss!!! The job has to be entertaining enough so time actually passes, and boring enough so you can say "it's 5.30, I'm going home" and rest. I'm like very passionate about my job, but I still have to do paperwork that I hate and work in excel. My motto with really boring stuff is to do things barely acceptable, actually aiming to do it as mediocre and fast as possible and see if it's tolerated. 99% of the time that's exactly what people needed. It's far better to be fast and kinda sloppy than very perfectionist and slow. Of course there might be some exceptions like brain surgeons xd, but you get the idea.
Just about anything sucks if you do it 40+ hours a week for years. I love playing guitar or running, but doing either of those 8 hours every day would burn me out really fast.
You can get burnout from anything no matter how much you like it. Take a look at for art example. If you practice your drawing skills ,you put hours and hours into it everyday you're gonna get a burn out. Every professional artist said that you should take a break once in a while, but I ignore it. Ended up quitting art for 4 months, I couldn't even look at a piece of paper without feeling "Ughh fuck that shit" and I'm very passionate in art (I'm back on track now). Life has so many things to offer, you don't have to focus on your passion 24/7. It is okay to take break from it, and do something else like sports or play videogames
A job should give you a positive feedback loop of giving you challenges that you can overcome to give you prove of self-worth. If a job doesn’t give you a positive feedback loop it’s a self-loathing death spiral.
The best rule i have set to myself is that I never talk about my job or even think about my job when the 8-hour is done. I just get into my car and drive home and do things I like. Even if my friends ask about my job like, how it is and stuff I just say "I don't care, I don't wanna talk about that". Ofcourse sometimes I say things, obviously but, in general I just forget it when I am out. This really saved me. I know I cant live just in weekends. But I know that if I think that I hate my job or things I dislike at it or people I don't like there even when I am not at it, is just wrong.
I wish I could do that. I hate my job, and still when I get home I have to work. And on my days “off” I have to do free consultations at the studio. I wish I could disappear
I had fun and developed very efficient systems at my job, until the management didn't bother to replace coworkers who left or retired. Now I get way too much work on my plate and at the same time dozens of people bother me with their problems on a single day, while I'm supposed to work on these problems. Talking to my colleagues, friends and family this is happening everywhere right now. Companies just ignore that a whole generation is retireing and burn all the young workers until they leave. I always tell myself that I'm only a single person and I can only do so much, but trying to do good work, while the phone is constantly ringing and people additionally giving you shit for a situation you can't change on your own is just exhausting and drains all my motivation.
I entered a job and was replacing a guy that had your job. He left a month after I joined... it's been 6 months of this now. I am not sure how to continue
I'm in a similar situation, I have waay to much work in my plate, but the thing is that I burned out so hard last year that I don't give a fuck anymore and I just am not productive anymore. I do stuff on my pace no matter what and sometimes I just do nothing the hole day. I thought doing that for a time would allow me to heal from this burnout, but it only made it worse. Now I'm honing my skills to switch jobs next year, because if I stay one more year in this job I think I'll go insane.
People in my town: Ugh? Why don't young people want to work? 😠 My teenage brother: * go work at struggling restaurant * works hard * makes friends with 2-3 coworkers doing the same things as him * over time, they all eventually get fired because he works as hard as three people now the restaurant is back where it started 😐
@grain9640 Yep I worked and still work in a restaurant. If you work hard you will be given 3 times as much work for no compensation and boss will yell at you for the slightest thing while others that don't even complete their basic duties get a free pass. I honestly have no clue why this happens so often, people are just sick.
For me it's never been the job itself, it's always been the people I couldn't stand. I seem to end up in places where people are pushy, in a rush, agitated constantly, one guy wants you to do it this way but another wants it a different way, they curse far too much or they just can't shut up, which is the most annoying.
I just had that scenario with my manager the other day. He got mad that I kept looking at a floor plan twice. He said why why are you doing that? Don't you eat get enough sleep? Idk that just pissed me off.
I quit my last job 4.5 months in because my toxic psycho co-worker played shitty folk music all day everyday and SANG OUT LOUD and she's a lousy singer. I felt I was going to burst, as though I was on bas concert all day. I'm still trying to recover from the trauma and the headaches. The shit seriously screwed me over. I feel I never want to step into an office again.
I hate my job, it's what drove me to start studying at night and work towards a different career, and luckily I get to stay at the same place I work. There's something out there bearable enough for everyone.
@@deadinside8781 it all depends at what point in life you are at and what mindset you're on. Trust me when your desperate and need for survive you'll do anything and achieve because that enough driving force. That's why they say staying too comfortable in one place for too long is bad because it stops you from striving to do more. Sometimes life give you that curveball for the better. That is not to say there arent people who dont need an external force to get themselves moving.
I feel like the cause of my misery at work is within myself. I am so mentally disabled that even at an easy job where i'm not at threat of failure, i'll still have mental breakdowns/anxiety attacks AT MY JOB... and it's terrible. i wish i could work but my fear of failing my boss is so strong that i end up lying down on the floor and crying to myself.
I’m so sorry. I feel the same way, with my ADHD it’s so hard to function and feel normal when there’s expectations of functioning “normally” and “effectively” placed upon you at every second, and very isolating as well, feeling like you can’t relate to anyone else there about your struggles.
It’s pretty normal sadly for people in our generation to be this way, almost everyone I’ve worked with my age at 4 different jobs say exactly what you just described, our generation was not built for monotonous soul-crushing work
@@zoegovopoulos9032Yeah, I also suspect to have ADHD (on a waiting list unfortunately) and it feels like society just decided which human attributes they hate the most by looking up the ADHD symptoms list.
I'm a total wreck, I'm lazy, unmotivated and horribly addicted to social media especially RUclips, it all started with slacking on job and over time it snowballed, the more I slacked the more I needed to do next, manager started to notice that I'm not performing that well, he encouraged me and softly pushed me to work harder, but I grew to hate the job, I'm super unmotivated, perform poorly while working 12 hours everyday, the only thing I dream about is quitting, but I'm scared to be unemployed and I constatnly thing that I can push more and be productive but it fails all the time, it makes me more depressed and all the effort feels so forced, so tough and stressfull, I just want a coouple of weeks of tranquility, but I can't get a long vacation because I'm not performing enough and we're pushing a lot of deadlines, it feels so bad, I hate myself for the fact that the thing I want the most is to give up and find something else, because I'm sure that I'm to blame, not the job.
I work in maintenance. I make 22 an hour to wait for things to break. I have some preventive maintenance tasks to go grease a bearing or check a magnehelic, but overall I don't do shit. I dissociate a ton throughout the day. I'm always in my head, and take brief moments to reality when I need to. I am also a total wreck and lazy and unmotivated and horribly addicted to dopamine. I just have a job that allows me to do it without getting in trouble. Honestly it sucks. I don't feel like I'm capable of working an actual job anymore. It's like my mind is too far gone. Keep your mind active even if it's on boring work. Look into finding new work in the meantime. I get your anxiety but you're further ahead then someone like me who found a job that let me quit trying.
It’s good to have a co-worker to bounce off of just to make sure you’re still grounded in reality when things seem unrealistic or unreasonable…Just be careful who you confide in and commiserate with in any job.
It truly does. I thought I was loosing my mind when I could see all the problems in management. Complained and got gaslighted that I'm the issue. It wasnt until a co worker told me the exact same problem company has and the people who pretend to work are the favored ones. That's when I realized it was me not doing enough.
I am a 17 year old who had just graduated high school and found myself working at a warehouse between friday till the end of the week, 10 hour shifts. Often times i forget how much i hate this job until the next weekend rolls by and im sitting there the night before just hating the fact that i have to get up and do the same old 8 - 6. I want to do something else but i am afraid that it would be a worse job than the one i currently have. I also dont want to bear the shame of having to tell my mother that i quit without finding a new job. My mother always says "ce'st la vie" when i complain about how much i absolutely hate my job. She tells me "thats life", and it kinda makes me feel alienated as if i am weird for hating my job and that i just have to deal with it. This reinforces the whole "this is gonna be this way forever" and that "all jobs are meant to make you feel misrable" and ultimately, it makes me feel like absolute shit.
Save money up, find a different job while working for that job once everything clears work there and if doesn’t work stick with that job while looking for another until you find one that works for you. I’d recommend finding passions outside of work. That make work not the only thing.
Your rationalizations are all fear-based. We only get one life to live. if you hate something, you've got to figure out how to get out of it. Even if it doesn't work out, at least you know you tried and then you get to try again.
I enjoyed the job I had despite it being nothing more than entry level retail work in which I was eventually promoted, because the people around me were so great, and the work was manageable. Then all of them left/promoted/retired and my life was a living hell. It's interesting to me because on one hand, maybe their departure exposed how bad things really were. On the other hand, bad management ruins any establishment fast. I'm part of a growing line of people who left the business because of the superiors. It's weird being back on the labor market after so long. It's like getting out of a relationship after nearly a decade and having to learn how to date again.
Great vid. I've been working most of my life now. I've worked shitty ones and I have a good one now. The trick to liking work is just trying to have fun and keep a good attitude. Remember nothing is personal good things or bad things. Also, for the corporate types, don't just go for the most money. Go for the best manager. Money is a detail but your manager can set you back years or push you forward into something better you never imagined.
every job i've had was violating some regulation or another. always involved making workers do things the business is not allowed to make workers do. im willing to deal with even that, if you just pay me enough to remain alive while doing the work.. i dont understand how anyone can justify paying people less than what it costs for those people to BE ALIVE.
Wage Slavery, it always will inspire sufficient desperation, in order to tax you for being alive. And the Debt is always to follow requests from a manager that never can truly care about you
I went through job hopping to find a great job and one i liked, Took like 5 years and ruined my work history but finally found one that i love and is the highest paying ive ever had. Don't give up doods
some of the best choices ive made in the workforce was deliberately disregarding my parent's advice. Their advice to me was "never say no" and to keep my head down, do good work and don't complain. while on the surface that may sound like good advice, I was able to improve my overall happiness by just... asking for what I wanted. And because of that I rarely worked weekends, had a semi consistent schedule, (as much as you can have in retail) and switched departments to one I liked better than the one I was hired for. There is so much potential in just asking for what you want. You're not going to get fired for asking.
That’s good advice from your parents. Note for onlookers: just because some of your best decisions are from neglecting this advice doesn’t mean that it’s bad advice if it works most of the time. I know, personally, I would have pissed off a lot less people if I did my work and didn’t complain
I think the lesson here is knowing your boundaries and having self respect. You need to know where you stand and when people start crossing a line, by being disrespectful or asking you to do more when it isnt part of your reporte. Yes knowing when to say no for solid reasons is good but saying yes can also open possibilities to new positions new contacts more flexibility. I'm ngl tho, it wasnt until I started acting like a b complaining that I started to get more respect around me. That's truly unfortunate you have to be that way in a toxic working environment otherwise you'll get eaten. But if the working environment is functioning I dont see how saying yes a few times is bad for honest work
On the contrary. I know several people who have asked for not even a pay increase just additional roles. My brother wanted to automate some stuff in a role he was in and explained he wasn’t fulfilled with his current role alone. Got fired weeks later for COVID layoffs while several people who were objectively worse at his job than he was held their positions. Because he expressed discontent. Be careful!
@@benjaminchen8857 sounds like your issue is more finding balance in what’s a reasonable hill to die on and what isn’t in the workplace. Most people have been given a speech like the one my parents gave me and follow it religiously, to their own detriment. At the end of the day there are those whose live to work, and those who work to live and when you decide which of those you are it will define a lot of the boundaries you feel comfortable setting in the workplace.
00:03 Tips on how to not be miserable at your job 05:02 Understanding the nature of misery in a job can help reduce misery and pave the way for a better job. 10:47 Being aware of cycles in relationships and jobs is crucial for personal growth. 15:41 Adapting to your job is important 20:20 Different people have different preferences for job variety and consistency. 25:08 Finding enjoyment in your job through autonomy and simple labor. 29:21 Adjusting dimensions of your job can make your experience better. 33:53 Don't suffer alone, reach out and connect with someone at work. 38:06 There are several key things to consider when dealing with job misery. 42:36 The importance of accountability and progress in psychotherapy
This video just made my day whole lotta better. I work online, its like this whole day ive got not a single soul to talk to. I have never been wanting this office drama, coffee room break environment so badly in my life. I have to look for a work that I can meet people, even if it pays less or with a fucked up schedule. I need social activities in my life
Granted, I live in the Netherlands, and I know we have quite a lot of safety nets. However, my plan is to literally do "move from job to job". I've done customer service for a year, and I know I'll never wanna work 8 hours a day ever again taking phone calls one after another constantly. That is not for me. So now I'm looking at maybe chat support. yknow like customer support but just chatting online. That seems alright for now. And if that isn't enjoyable, I'll maybe try to do some freelance work and see. Or I take a bootcamp study in smth like I.T. if I can afford it to see if maybe that is smth for me. Now, I know what is for me. It's music. I love doing music, I'm thinking using platforms like Artlist to make passive income from songs whilst also releasing my own music. Is it a small success chance? Yes. But outside of that, I just gotta look for smth that is alright to me no matter what
Thats nice man, I am jealous. I lost what I thought was my golden ticket into my field of IT during the pandimec due to mental health issues and been barely paying bills going from contract work to contract work while going to online college fulltime. It feels incredibly stagnate and like a spiral, but I am glad to hear there are people out there that still have the freedom I wish I had. I am sure I will get there one day.
Now it makes so much sense why you don't understand why so many chatters are locked into shit jobs. In America, you take what you can get if you want healthcare, if you want social welfare due to the BS means testing built into the system, you take 30-40k debt to go to fucking college. You have no labor protections.
I mean you gotta find a job before you can hate it. Everyone's telling me there's a labour shortage, but I've applied to dozens of jobs and all of them have dozens if not hundreds of applicants.
I mean, per obvious, the internet makes it so applicant are multiplied by the hundreds for about any job. That’s just a result of the ease of finding jobs and applying. It doesn’t necessarily means more people are entering the labour force lmao. The world is changing and no one knows for sure how to deal with this shit.
Again with the videos I need at the right time. Been contemplating leaving my job the past... like 3 months and it is true that you can make adjustments and see if it gets better for you - i expressed towards my boss that I was planning to leave and she spent some time with me making adjustments to things and exploring new options. You also do adapt. You may not get any better but it's not as horrible as the first week on the job.
the people you end up working with is the biggest wildcard. people who micromanage, make decisions on my behalf without even knowing what it is i actually do or bothering to ask, push unreasonable deadlines down our throat, don't understand or acknowledge issues with management, are unwilling to accept mistakes of any kind, and who never are satisfied with the work being done have been the ones who make me miserable.
LMAO 15:45 Dr. K is basically like “I know you hate your job but what I learned from people in prison is that you’ll adapt.” 😂😂 Great analogy tbh, Job = Prison hahahah
@@markventure2745 And even sadder that you guys still listen to shills like Dr K who is literally trying to convince/manipulate you guys into loving and/or tolerating your shackles Fuck that
@@markventure2745 True, although it was normalized thousands of years ago. What's more sad is our failure to abolish it - instead we just changed its conditions (e.g. USA's Thirteenth Amendment)
I actually love these videos. And I’m very anti authority and find it difficult to talk to a therapist. This helps a lot to love in the right direction in life
You have one of the most intricate ways to think about life (I was trying to come up with a better word than life, but then I just thought-heck, why not-life) out of anyone I've heard on RUclips. It's truly at another level and makes me ponder life in a deeper way than I thought was previously impossible. Anyways, don't want to ramble on...I would love to hear your take on how things like "finding your purpose in life" or "finding ways to force oneself to get through a major part of life-work" ties in with the monetary system. I feel like I do know loads on the monetary system from spending 100's of hours watching videos, listening to podcasts, reading articles etc. but I'd still love to hear any thoughts you may have on that (even if you have less knowledge about it than some other people spending their lives focusing on it), as your level of thinking on these issues would lead me to think that your thoughts would definitely be of value. If you're unsure about this particular subject, I'd love to start a conversation about it, just to have some good banter.
I feel like I achieve more in games than in real life becuase in game, my achievements are somewhat simple to understand and feel happy doing so. With Irl Its the opposite.
I feel you completely on this. You put in the work and complete your task in games and it feels good cuz you are being fairly compensated with loot or etc. when it comes to real life you barely get that fair compensation, no matter how well you done the job and if you did everything right. It’s truly insufferable.
The common theme below, with myself included, is that most people start off having good relationships with coworkers, actually like their job to an extent. Then those coworkers leave or retire, and either they aren't replaced or they are replaced with new people that are just different that you don't get along with. Coupled with this new normal of dumping as much work as possible onto someone if they are a good worker. And coupled with limited promotion/ job growth opportunities, and stagnant pay. That's why people are hating their jobs right now. I think the only ones that like their jobs are the young ones that are naive. I wouldn't be surprised if the f'ing elites and VPs also hate their job for the constant expectation to achieve growth year after year, or putting a spin on the positives of why it's ok to be performing poorly with losses, and explain the get-well plan.
Really resonate with that dumping qork on a good worker, yesterday I was doing tasks nonstop because people kept asking me for help despite the fact 2-3 other people where in the kitchen as well. Like they saw a manager ask me to do something and then they all jumped on it smh 🤦 couldn't wait for my shift to end.
@@decidueyezealot8611 Same. I almost wanna do deliberately badly at a job, so I'd get less responsibility, but I don't think my perfectionism would let me! Managers seems to enjoy the pressure, and mistakingly believe that someone performing well means that they are a 'go-getter' wanting to climb the ladder. Dude, some of us just want a quiet life, but happen to be a conscientious worker. Leave me be!
There is some kind of stupid obsession with doing everything beyond perfect, to the point it affects people negatively. But we must "always strive to go above and beyond". I don't understand why "good-enough" is never an option. Most jobs I've hated have been with perfectionist, micromanaging bosses.
Sometimes, it’s the job itself that intolerable. Other times, it’s the people who are intolerable. The latter is more controllable than the former, though it’ll require some work.
It's really interesting listening to this considering that sometimes I get myself thinking about my job. I like the video, there's a bunch of things said there that I've been learning/realizing about my job and it's cool to reinforce it and hear from someone that understands the kind of stuff that we are not really taught.
Thank you Dr. K. You are helping me in the right direction. I can’t wait to get on meds again, and have therapy. It’s a struggle and it’s painful. The lessons you are passing down are a gift I could never imagine. I’ve been taking notes and trying to memorize these lessons. I am guilty of binge watching some of your stuff, but I’d rather do that than mindlessly scroll through tik tok and instagram and fap to garbage. It would be a pleasure to meet you one day.
12:00 this is so underrated. As I recently moved from mid to senior developer I now experience the joys of recruitment. And too often I need to ask "what were you doing in this period?" and hear "oh I just worked retail its nothing worth mentioning." Really not worth mentioning? The fact that you managed to work while studying or wanted to work during holidays. Or even just worked somewhere while not being able to find work that you wanted. All these are super valuable because they show your determination. Remember. On your cv: any job is better than a hole. Especially during covid people just have a gaping hole for a year or more. At least plug in freelance and think of all the times you helped your boomer parents with their electronics. Anything is infinitely better than nothing.
I hate hustle culture, I don’t want to be part of a system of 9-5, there’s more to life than being work oriented. My life’s purpose is to be there for people and be the best friend, partner, sibling I can be.
@@soph4002 I’m simply saying hustle cultures toxic, you may do everything right in life and still end up wasting the only 70-80 (at best) years of your life hardly making enough to where you don’t have to even worry about financial ruin and how that can impair your freedom to a healthy thriving life. Secondly it’s disappointing seeing how many people are indoctrinated into this life of hustle and consumerism, yes I partake, yes I’ve worked many jobs but that doesn’t mean I have to like the fact that I do. I think it’s a silly fucking system we created for ourselves. As a species we I feel as we failed collectively as we’ve created a world of greed and materialism. So many of us condoning the very thing that most likely contributes to a lot of mental illnesses.
@@skyemccuien2998 fair enough, I agree with you. I interpreted your comment a bit differently. I think there are some fulfilling jobs out there, it's just hard to find the one that fits, especially since we choose a career direction too young. Good luck to you
@@soph4002 I have a house paid off and I just need 5k a year for property taxes. I like what he said being there for people and being a friend sounds like a more fulfilling life than being a corporate slave backstabbing coworkers for that promotion.
Ok, the notion that you'll get a better job from your crappy job, is a load of bunk. Most jobs hire based on either experience or interpersonal connections, meaning the only thing your crappy job is likely to lead to, is similar crappy jobs that is most likely equal or worse. How skilled you are at the crappy jobs is irrelevant, because most of them aren't based on any serious skills, to begin with; that's why they pay you by the hour, because your labor is primarily a function of time spent there.
To be honest, I had been watching another RUclips channel called "A Life After Layoff" saying that spending a long time working for a company is BAD for your career. That is why you should be upskilling yourself in your chosen career/profession every opportunity you get, as well as the "free agent" mindset.
The consistency vs. chaos (variety) got me. I like a bit of both in my jewelry career. I greatly value consistency, in that I can show up, sit down, and work without interruption. However, working on the same styles of jewelry all the time gets to be boring and unimaginative. Very little space for me to feel personally creative, paired with the frequent interruptions that come from jobs that need to be done right away because the customer decided to wait rather than come back later, are the two factors I can identify that cause me to feel poorly.
I worked as a Chef for 4 years at 4 different places and listening to podcasts during prep was my favourite thing. Much wisdom to learn from this video!
honestly being able top miserably pull yourself to work on a consistent basis is a luxury. when I work I get mad depressed to the point of not being able to get out of bed after a week or two of working. It's the worst, I do want to help but I feel like I don't have the necessary facilities to be helpful.
personally I think it comes down to cost of living. You work your ass off and at the end of the week of toil, eating other peoples shit, you've got enough tokens to keep yourself alive and pay rent (usually someone elses mortgage). but don't stop because you've got to do it again next week. and if you don't eat enough shit and smile as you do it, you'll be threatened with homelessness and poverty. rinse + repeat
Yes if the cost of living was very low like $800 doller rent while being paid $20-25 as a nurse that would be a great deal. If you have roomates that would be even better.
Really wish I saw this 2 weeks ago. I quit my job where I was (mostly) happy to start a new job that paid more. Turns out the new job was awful and I couldn’t make it 2 days there. It was too late to get my old job back. So now I’ve lost both opportunities. :(
All “normal” jobs suck. That’s our punishment for being average, I guess. The only way to find happiness is by being self-employed and that requires incredible amount of talent, confidence and luck.
I worked in warehouses in hellish SoCal heat for a decade, boys. Now, I work from home doing tech support and am far happier and more comfortable. You can get out of it! Keep going.
These are nice things to think about for young people early in their working lives, but I wonder what suggestions there are for adults a decade into a well paid work in tech who have zero respect for the organizations in general. They're all much less than the sum of their parts. People are great and smart yet the companies are pitifully run and ethically pathetic.
Thank you for this. I've been out of the official working world for a while and I'm preparing to jump back into the rat race. I've been very anxious about it and I cant say you've completely removed my anxiety but you have definitely given me more tools I can use when I'm struggling.
I just finished up my 2nd week at a new job. I had about 10 months off. I spent the last 3 months preparing, just getting rid of addictions and improving general health and fitness. I was very calm about it all and got the first job I applied for. It helps to trust that if it happens good, if it doesn't happen, also good. Their loss, right.
I literally just searched "Dr K crappy jobs" on RUclips because I had another anxiety attack before work this morning. What the hell Dr K..? What kind of Vedic magic is this?
This video was exactly what I needed. Extremely helpful straightforward information. Info that I can apply to my own process of figuring out what my next steps are in my career hunting process. Thank you so much!
I personally went through about 5 years of shitty jobs. Saved money, like 5k a year. Invested in stocks and crypto(becareful with this ponzi asset) and now I'm able to sell cover calls for stock options. Make 7k to 12k a month. I still work but part time. I control my life now. I don't need to work(I only work because is actually very chill and pays decently)
I really hated working because I was usually too good at any job I had. Not trying to brag but I'm just a natural hard worker. Eventually all of my bosses would just dump work on me while letting my coworkers slack off, but yet we got the same exact pay? So of course, me being able to handle lots of work, I always decided to climb the ladder at any job place so then my bosses feel threatened and they eventually fire me because I became a threat to their position. I work for myself doing work online now because I'm disabled with lymes disease. But the jobs are so competitive now days, do enough to not become too reliable and to not be a threat, but don't hold back so much you get fired for having no value. Jobs are screwed now days and everyone's mental state is so strange in the job force. The good employees get screwed while the bad ones get promotions and raises based off their family connections, appearance, workplace friends, and other bs.
i feel like an isolated alien. im 30 and still feel like a child of some sort. i am barely even taking care of myself now. im getting my father to pay for sessions.. it all feels so complicated to me, despite having done therapy for months, and trying to train to grow, the best i can do is level myself or go overall downward. it feels like my brain squelches itsself into pain whenever i really get into it. i used to have a habit of emotional stoppage to try to keep myself from showing feelings as i was growing up, idk how much its affecting me now, esp since ive been trying to allow myself emotions.. but its so much.. its always been too much i think, cause food addiction and responsibility avoidance started very early and has not been healed. i feel more unreconcilable the further i go. im such a slow learner and i know its cause the part of me that doesnt want to stop doing things like this has such a strong grip.. i never got the help i needed and now i regret even growing older just cause i cant reliably get the help i think i need now. that thought process/addiction system seems to out meta everything else that i learn thats good for me.
@@potatoking2217 yeah, I’m here relating to this wondering the same. Also in my 30s and finding it hard to do anything. I know I need to go back to school but I feel too old
last year i got a job at walmart in ogp, I was stoked when i first started as I was morbidly exhausted of my cycle of inaction (toking, games, porn, awful diet, general lethargy). ready to finally have a proper routine. months go by I become horribly ill with resentment, in every way unappreciative & heedless. for the last month I was there I started to accept it & realized it was all about how I chose to feel about it, you can go in miserable or you can try your hardest to be happy. the latter is sufficient for your well being days away from getting my attendance points reset (they reset every 6 months), I get blindsided by the flu, making it my first time being sick in years. not having enough points to cover the days, I rested at home with the thoughts of possibly losing my job subtly sprinkling in. I go to the doctor, get a note, scoop myself back up with a mental rusty spoon & come back in the next scheduled day. hour into workin, get a call on my phone from my tl to come to the back office. flailed my doctors note around like my castle just got sieged by the cumans & at last, I get inevitably fired. it was my first true lesson on why you should always be grateful for what you have, routine is the best drug against depression.
I havent watched the vid yet but ill share my two cents. Ive worked a lot of shitty jobs, and i mean really shitty minimum wage work in barely legal conditions. RN Im in a career i actually enjoy and its night and day from my first few jobs. I have hated almost every single job ive ever had, but the only ones I havent hated are the ones I can do for money and that dont have a toxic work environment. You cant quit just because of toxicity its a reason to quit not the reason to quit. You have to find out what kind of work you are compatible with, You might love to cook but you might hate it as a job. Unfortunately the only way to find out is by first hand experience.
1:00 "I always work my hardest" might already be the problem. Even if you like your job, this might not always be the best idea. You will probably work better than if you didn't work your hardest that day, but your average will go down a lot when you're just exhausted and start feeling miserable.
I've been having this issue lately myself. I have an amazing position in a solid company doing work that I'm naturally good at and making great money, but the latest projects, staffing changes, and management culture has been genuinely soul crushing. Issues that I tried to call out years ago are finally coming to a head, responsibilities beyond my role and experience level are piling up, and it feels like we're headed for a cliff that no one wants to acknowledge. It's been causing me to wake up with panic attacks. These are issues in my specific group and particular projects that we're not equipped to handle, so it's not the company or general role that's killing me - it's the current situation. Leaves me in a shitty spot since I know that leaving would be an immediate relief, but I'd effectively have to start from square 1 making half as much as I do now after spending the better part of a decade making it to this point.
Did you try being honest about it to your manager? Something like that was also happening at my company and I was getting closer and closer to burnout. At some point I just told my manager that I was having a hard time juggling so many different things. They immediately asked how they could help and started either redirecting the work to someone else or said it was fine if I dropped a few things. Turns out that managers often don't realize you're drowning since you keep saying yes and you deliver. You're the one that has to let them know when it's too much. Generally they will want to help you because having an employee burn out is not good for them either.
Dr K is a mind reader lol. I was dealing with this lately, I'm working minimum wage, but I'm trying to get a full time 9-5 job soon. Happy Wednesday everyone
I just have really bad anxiety when I’m at work. I walk in everyday and since I work at a lab, there are a lot of different things that us student workers need to do. So I usually don’t know what I’m going to be doing that day, and there is a new thing for me to do a lot of the time and I am very worried that if I mess something up, then people might think that I’m dumb and that is my worst fear when I’m at work, so every time something gets explained to me I worry that I’ll mess it up, I don’t fully listen and then I mess something up. Its like I just choke in everyday work life and it’s not that I can’t understand how to do something, I just panic and don’t listen or I forget out of over panic and fear from judgment. I just need help on working on not worrying about what people think of me or about me failing.
Same! My anxiety is stopping me from being calm enough to be productive and when coworkers say its simple, just do it it makes the anxiety worse. Been trying to plan but really need to work on it to form that habit.
Damn I get so intimidated by the topics of jobs bc I'm unemployed and extremely bad at almost everything work related, mainly due to my mental health, and to fix it I need money, for which I need to work... Thankfully I have Dr k and others' videos on mental health stuff so I can help myself even if a little bit
The best days at my old job were the ones that I got done everything I set out to do during that day. The worst days were the ones that everything wasn't going well and more problems showed up... btw I find it really hard to understand my preferences, its like Im always in "third person mode"...
I used to love my job, until my boss passed management to this guy, who I not only he doesn’t bring enough stock of things people buy, but he want us to force people to buy things they don’t like. Then, every-time we’re making more money on commission they change it, and every time we’re getting paid less and less, and they even took our chairs away! We don’t have a lunch room, and spent 10 hours standing? Like I’m looking for something as close to me, but damm is it hard to enjoy it
Personally, thanks to the pandemic, I believe the best job nowadays is remote work, which companies are trying to take away by returning to the office to go back to "normal" (workers were doing well working at home during the pandemic) or depending on some jobs, some managers become overly controlling online, but if it's a good team/communication, as long as you get work done, that's the best job, because they respect the work you do and know you will get the job done without micromanaging you all the time. I am just starting out in my career but I love working from home, I get feedback from the team but I feel like I am in full control. I get to work and be productive for a certain amount of hours, and then I have free time for learning a new skill, self care, cooking in the kitchen, some time for exercise, finally having time for fun hobbies like video games or binge watching shows/movies, or getting extra rest at home, etc. Remote work IMO has been such a blessing in many ways. I save money from commute and more time and energy for myself, and spending more time with my family. It's going to be so hard to transition to a physical work environment if I apply to a different job in the future post pandemic because remote work showed me the alternative to working, I love working at home. At least if I'm gonna go to a physical environment to work, I want hybrid, some days in the office/studio and other days remote at home. I want a career but I also need balance and have time for myself as well. Before college I used to work in retail for minimum wage to buy school supplies and the manager treated me so awfully in front of customers, I was so embarrassed but I just did what she said and make sure I did my job in retail, but that was the worst time of my life, it made me so down and with a loss of energy. It pushed me to finish my education to pursue jobs with better pay, flexible schedule, and a better work environment.
Being physically disabled [legally blind] means my pool of jobs is severely limited. Also having higher anxiety levels than a normal person means call centers puts me in a really bad space. So it's difficult for me to find work both on site and most work from home. So I feel pretty stuck. Been working at a hotel front desk for almost 3 years and felt pretty ambivalent towards it for most of my tenure.
Just 10 minutes in and I’m loving it. I don’t dislike my job, I absolutely freaking despise and loathe my job. But I took it to get a raise, and save enough over a year period so that I can quit and move far far faaaar away. I hate this, but it has an endpoint and a purpose. I get massively overwhelmed and I’m very very convinced that this job isn’t really something one person can reasonably do. But I now know what to avoid in my job search when I move. And I know how bad work can really get. (Undoubtedly there’s always a way things can get worse. But this experience was more then enough to teach me what to avoid.) Point of my monologue is this, a lot of what he’s mentioning here are the only reasons I was able to make it this long at this job.
How should i bring myself to love the process of making my boss money, there is nothing to bring me joy from that transaction? Starting my own company is even more stressful and risky, for a short life i have on this earth, i don't see the reason i would want to have a business other than money, in which i am not interested. Only thing making job bearable is the aspect of me not dying and not being dependant on anyone
@@Fightookaishii I mean, i just realized i described alienation in that comment, and judging by the vast literature written about it, even in the 21st century (bullshit jobs, e. g.), this is a common trend
I've thought about quitting my IT job to go stock shelves or work at pizza nova. I like your job because you dont have to take your work home with you. You can complete your hours everyday and go home to relax.
@@davidharrow9025 exactly. I have a process engineering degree specialization in analytic chemistry but I especially like the work culture in my store, like, every person. Even the bosses.
I got wrongfully terminated from my job about 3 months ago, it was the first job I loved going to work, it was the first job that I got promoted to the very top and helped me get over my insecurity about my adhd - I felt purpose, I went above and beyond for my employees (I was a dispensary store manager) The owners allowed a new GM to come in, and he removed me because I was the only person who would be on to him (he later stole thousands of dollars of product, and really hurt the business) the owners even re hired some of the workers who quit because the new management was trash, but nothing for me even though I pointed out this GM right from the start as being a fraud... I have been more depressed and suicidal then ever, what's worse is people around me don't want to hear about it anymore, so I have all these hurt feelings kept inside, and everyone just wants me to be a man and move on and be strong - ive tried 2 others so far, not only am I finding it physically impossible to do (I have blood cancer and makes physical work quite difficult) or I just get anxiety and stress and depression and my brains gets into a cycle how much i cant do this job and how much i hate it. I truly dont know what to do anymore
Dr. K, I'm glad you took on this question even though it didn't have all the details you mentioned. I'm glad because my guess is that having an undesirable job is a very common experience.
12:00 is proof that you have control over what you say and how you react to things. From spending spending wayyy too much time on reddit I instantly anticipated the most toxic of a response here, but Dr k wielded his words to himself
Kinda needed that validation that it's normal and ok to dislike working with people. Honestly, all my life I've been taught to try to work with others even tho I haven't liked it from a very young age and was held back in nursery school for not socializing haha. Always assumed employers want team players, but f it I'm a great worker, just leave me alone.
"If you ask you can sometimes adjust some things about your job". True, but first you need to prove you're a reliable employee who can get the job done without complaining. If you start a job and a week later you start asking them to change their workflow to accommodate you, it's not going to sit well with most employers.
7. is so important. I've been fired more than once for being "overly negative", but the freedom of being able to talk openly about problems at work gives me hope and inspiration to overcome them both for the benefit of everyone including the company, but sweeping them under the rug makes the job living hell. It could be that if you're a practical problem solver, like an engineer, mechanic or a doctor, fixing things that are broken is what you live for, but if you're a bean counter all you see are things that are threatening the KPIs that determine your bonus and status in the hierarchy. That may be the source of a lot of friction between ICs and middle management, where an irreverent but uplifting and inspiring conversation for one sounds like pure negativity when overheard by the other.
i am the same way as OP. my answer is to find places and gigs that allow me to control my schedule. i still hate my job but they only require 4 hours a week. it has stopped a lot of the misery, there is of course still plenty while im there but the week in between each four hours max gives me a good amount of recover time but still. i know theres something better out there than this and i think its within me and idk how to change it so ill keep watching the vid now.
And here I am thinking how are people able to jump from job to job. Idk if it's an American or European thing. But jobs seems so easy to find. I'm just glad I was able to get an income so far.
I just want A job. No one's hiring me. It's kinda sad. Might apply for unemployment soon cause I'm literally almost out of money for rent. '-' Didn't realize it'd be this hard to get a remote job... When I lived in another state a few months ago, companies were actually begging me to work there. And now that I moved back home, where the population is much larger, companies are so picky.
My job isn’t the greatest but they do a lot for the employees that make it more rewarding to work there. Things like remote fridays, incentivized bonuses, holidays off, etc. the problem is shitty jobs don’t even do the bare minimum to motivate there employees. Plz don’t give me that “WeLl iTs ThERe JoB”. The standard shouldn’t be get the bare minimum, expect the most work.
I AM the Boomer generation, born nearly 70 years ago, and I distinctly remember something along the lines of what I'm going to write below already being a cliche joke way back then. The story goes: My grampa told me, "Oh, you kids have it easy. When I was a boy, we had to walk five miles to school -- uphill both ways."
Yep, it's true though - the generations before us did generally have a harder time due to technological and societal progress being made in the interim. That being said, every generation faces different challenges. Maybe grampa had to walk five miles to school uphill both ways, but he likely didn't have to learn nearly as much at school to be "competitive" on the job market afterwards. Finding a job with only a primary- or highschool education these days, which also allows you to support a family on a single income, is basically impossible, while grampa in many cases could walk in off of the street and get hired for a decent salary. It feels like a bachelor's degree or trade degree is nearly mandatory for even entry level jobs these days.
@@kristianjensen5877 It is in western countries mainly that bachelor's and even now masters will become an absolute necessity to acquire jobs that are even entry-level jobs. Just graduated and I see many people applying for entry-level job that has masters on their cv's.
@@kristianjensen5877 YES back then you might had to walk 5 miles for a job but that job could support an entire family. Your right, learning a trade right off of highschool is almost mandatory. A person out of highschool has three choices work minimum wage(go to community college),attend college(this days it's only the high income earners due to income inequality but if you are a good student you might not pay for it), or join the military.
That's what I thought where bad jobs lead to good jobs, but I've stuck with similar jobs for 6 years and it led to absolutely nowhere. In fact it just led to the same miserable job... but worse. Then I switched jobs, and it felt like I just reset that 6 years and just got stuck with more miserable jobs. So I just gave up. It's nice that you think bad jobs lead to better ones etc but sometimes it's just not the case. How can it logistically work that everybody can eventually get great jobs anyways?
been working in tech support for couple of months now. Needles to say, I'm looking for a new job and I know I don't ever again in my life want to be on the phones and deal with customers
Most the time when someone hates their job, it's nto necessarily they'll hate any job, but that the job has more fo the shitty bits. Out of 4, 3 of my previous positions I enjoyed. One of them I did not, partly because I enjoyed my previous roles more?
![How to Get a Developer Job - Even in This Economy [Full Course]](/img/1.gif)
Some things like management just ruin jobs that would otherwise be fine. The constant anxiety of not being caught not doing anything (because there is genuinely nothing to do) and being constantly told off for talking to colleagues and not working every minute of the shift is just honestly burning everyone out. It's like you can never stop and just relax
I am a manager and I let my team do absolutely shit or nothing or whatever they want, sit down, read a book...nah..they compain they'd like to work more and they're bored if they dont...plz shoot me in the head :)
@@serban2139 everything in balance :) while people need to chill, they also need something to chill from yknow
@@acharba i think 4 hours of focused work in 8 hours of actual being at work is as perfect as you can get... mathematically speaking
yeah, it certainly is the worst part of what David Graeber coined as a "bs job" - one that might have not needed to exist as a separate role in the first place due to the delegated task being too minute to not be performed by already hired employees, but is supervised on some level nonetheless just because the person in the position is getting paid.
@@serban2139 Then why be at work for 8 hours and not 4
I've come to a point of burnout where I'd literally rather drop tf dead or go play in traffic on a highway than participate in the labor market. I don't know if it even can be fixed. I honestly believe that my 20+ years in customer service (while never having enough money to survive, so having to overwork myself regularly) has permanently broken me.
definitely feel that I have no idea how people are meant to work until they retire without having multiple mental breakdowns... burnout seems to be becoming the new norm that's somehow acceptable unfortunately :(
The problem is u spent 20 years in customer service when most people that’s a starter job and quickly realize there is no future or possible moving up from customer service, it’s a trap job mostly for young people designed to keep you in the dark. Always move up never stagnant. Standing water is bad, but a flowing river brings all kinds of possibilities. Quit on the spot give your boss the finger stand up for yourself and leave if your unhappy, just do it.
Many of us in all different fields feel this way. Jobs suck. They all do. It’s just about finding a job that sucks the least. Usually it takes 2-4 different jobs (big point: not 2-4 jobs in the same field, but 2-4 DIFFERENT jobs) to find something that sucks the least.
@@tylerjackson7948 kindoff agree, I have done servicedesk as a starter in IT than discovered how miserable helldesk roles were and just ran to another role in IT as fast as I could.
@@tylerjackson7948 Bro I work in bedside healthcare and it's customer service on top of the ever growing threats of litigation as well as the loss of your livelihood thru losing your practicing license as well as being responsible for making sure that your patients dont expire. It's double the stress. I remember when I used to do customer service and I HATED it idk why I even got here
For me personally, management is the #1 deciding factor on whether I like a workplace or not. I've been micromanaged, abused, mistreated by managers too many times now.
1 Manangement first
2 Coworkers
3 Workload
Workers don’t quit companies. They quit managers.
Like myself before, I think a lot of people don’t take inventory of their experiences and what they are looking for. I worked a ton of different jobs in different fields and found one thing, I wasn’t passionate about them. Once I made peace that a job doesn’t have to be for passion but was tolerable enough to do so I can focus on actual passions it helped me alot
Absolutely this. have a job you can do reasonably unstressed . And pursue your passions outside of work
Thissss!!! The job has to be entertaining enough so time actually passes, and boring enough so you can say "it's 5.30, I'm going home" and rest. I'm like very passionate about my job, but I still have to do paperwork that I hate and work in excel. My motto with really boring stuff is to do things barely acceptable, actually aiming to do it as mediocre and fast as possible and see if it's tolerated. 99% of the time that's exactly what people needed. It's far better to be fast and kinda sloppy than very perfectionist and slow. Of course there might be some exceptions like brain surgeons xd, but you get the idea.
Yes, this! This is the best job, the one that allows balance between work, pay decently, and able to pursue hobbies outside of work.
Yeah that's what im studying right now in university. I just want a job that I can be left alone and then I can pursue whatever I want afterwards.
I feel like these titles are calling me out now.
yes
Ikr, they just keep coming
Aren't they always like that?
Always has been, for abt 3 months streak
Same
Just about anything sucks if you do it 40+ hours a week for years. I love playing guitar or running, but doing either of those 8 hours every day would burn me out really fast.
you don't have to limit yourself to just one career in life, I've had multiple careers that were completely different from one another.
If you like something, you can never be burned out. Too many things to discover and be excited about. You might even forget to eat
You can get burnout from anything no matter how much you like it. Take a look at for art example. If you practice your drawing skills ,you put hours and hours into it everyday you're gonna get a burn out. Every professional artist said that you should take a break once in a while, but I ignore it. Ended up quitting art for 4 months, I couldn't even look at a piece of paper without feeling "Ughh fuck that shit" and I'm very passionate in art (I'm back on track now). Life has so many things to offer, you don't have to focus on your passion 24/7. It is okay to take break from it, and do something else like sports or play videogames
@@yarou3124 You're not a real artist, that's why you get tired of it.
Yea it’s much better to work at a pace that is sustainable for years than one you can only maintain for a few months
A job should give you a positive feedback loop of giving you challenges that you can overcome to give you prove of self-worth. If a job doesn’t give you a positive feedback loop it’s a self-loathing death spiral.
The best rule i have set to myself is that I never talk about my job or even think about my job when the 8-hour is done. I just get into my car and drive home and do things I like. Even if my friends ask about my job like, how it is and stuff I just say "I don't care, I don't wanna talk about that". Ofcourse sometimes I say things, obviously but, in general I just forget it when I am out. This really saved me. I know I cant live just in weekends. But I know that if I think that I hate my job or things I dislike at it or people I don't like there even when I am not at it, is just wrong.
This is good advice.
I wish I could do that. I hate my job, and still when I get home I have to work. And on my days “off” I have to do free consultations at the studio. I wish I could disappear
I had fun and developed very efficient systems at my job, until the management didn't bother to replace coworkers who left or retired. Now I get way too much work on my plate and at the same time dozens of people bother me with their problems on a single day, while I'm supposed to work on these problems.
Talking to my colleagues, friends and family this is happening everywhere right now. Companies just ignore that a whole generation is retireing and burn all the young workers until they leave.
I always tell myself that I'm only a single person and I can only do so much, but trying to do good work, while the phone is constantly ringing and people additionally giving you shit for a situation you can't change on your own is just exhausting and drains all my motivation.
I entered a job and was replacing a guy that had your job. He left a month after I joined... it's been 6 months of this now. I am not sure how to continue
I'm in a similar situation, I have waay to much work in my plate, but the thing is that I burned out so hard last year that I don't give a fuck anymore and I just am not productive anymore. I do stuff on my pace no matter what and sometimes I just do nothing the hole day. I thought doing that for a time would allow me to heal from this burnout, but it only made it worse. Now I'm honing my skills to switch jobs next year, because if I stay one more year in this job I think I'll go insane.
People in my town: Ugh? Why don't young people want to work? 😠
My teenage brother:
* go work at struggling restaurant
* works hard
* makes friends with 2-3 coworkers doing the same things as him
* over time, they all eventually get fired because he works as hard as three people
now the restaurant is back where it started 😐
@grain9640 Yep I worked and still work in a restaurant. If you work hard you will be given 3 times as much work for no compensation and boss will yell at you for the slightest thing while others that don't even complete their basic duties get a free pass. I honestly have no clue why this happens so often, people are just sick.
People retire in every generation.
Listening to this while on the verge of quiting the job I detest.
i did yesterday - oop
I quit my job a month ago with no backup plan, I just couldn't take it anymore
me @ walmart 😭
@@intergalacticglobalistslayer felt this
🤣🤣 same
For me it's never been the job itself, it's always been the people I couldn't stand. I seem to end up in places where people are pushy, in a rush, agitated constantly, one guy wants you to do it this way but another wants it a different way, they curse far too much or they just can't shut up, which is the most annoying.
I just had that scenario with my manager the other day. He got mad that I kept looking at a floor plan twice. He said why why are you doing that? Don't you eat get enough sleep? Idk that just pissed me off.
I quit my last job 4.5 months in because my toxic psycho co-worker played shitty folk music all day everyday and SANG OUT LOUD and she's a lousy singer. I felt I was going to burst, as though I was on bas concert all day. I'm still trying to recover from the trauma and the headaches. The shit seriously screwed me over. I feel I never want to step into an office again.
I hate my job, it's what drove me to start studying at night and work towards a different career, and luckily I get to stay at the same place I work. There's something out there bearable enough for everyone.
I have a lot of doubt I could do both things at the same time. But I guess if you don't have a choice...
@@deadinside8781 it all depends at what point in life you are at and what mindset you're on. Trust me when your desperate and need for survive you'll do anything and achieve because that enough driving force. That's why they say staying too comfortable in one place for too long is bad because it stops you from striving to do more. Sometimes life give you that curveball for the better. That is not to say there arent people who dont need an external force to get themselves moving.
@@deadinside8781 It’s really not hard to get a degree, you can get by with 2hr a day studying easy
I feel like the cause of my misery at work is within myself. I am so mentally disabled that even at an easy job where i'm not at threat of failure, i'll still have mental breakdowns/anxiety attacks AT MY JOB... and it's terrible. i wish i could work but my fear of failing my boss is so strong that i end up lying down on the floor and crying to myself.
I’m so sorry. I feel the same way, with my ADHD it’s so hard to function and feel normal when there’s expectations of functioning “normally” and “effectively” placed upon you at every second, and very isolating as well, feeling like you can’t relate to anyone else there about your struggles.
It’s pretty normal sadly for people in our generation to be this way, almost everyone I’ve worked with my age at 4 different jobs say exactly what you just described, our generation was not built for monotonous soul-crushing work
@@padarousou "monotonous soul-crashing work" sounds like a shit workplace overall, mentally prepared for that or not. No job should be like that :/
Nghe là biết Mấy đứa bánh bèo rồi haha
@@zoegovopoulos9032Yeah, I also suspect to have ADHD (on a waiting list unfortunately) and it feels like society just decided which human attributes they hate the most by looking up the ADHD symptoms list.
I'm a total wreck, I'm lazy, unmotivated and horribly addicted to social media especially RUclips, it all started with slacking on job and over time it snowballed, the more I slacked the more I needed to do next, manager started to notice that I'm not performing that well, he encouraged me and softly pushed me to work harder, but I grew to hate the job, I'm super unmotivated, perform poorly while working 12 hours everyday, the only thing I dream about is quitting, but I'm scared to be unemployed and I constatnly thing that I can push more and be productive but it fails all the time, it makes me more depressed and all the effort feels so forced, so tough and stressfull, I just want a coouple of weeks of tranquility, but I can't get a long vacation because I'm not performing enough and we're pushing a lot of deadlines, it feels so bad, I hate myself for the fact that the thing I want the most is to give up and find something else, because I'm sure that I'm to blame, not the job.
I work in maintenance. I make 22 an hour to wait for things to break.
I have some preventive maintenance tasks to go grease a bearing or check a magnehelic, but overall I don't do shit.
I dissociate a ton throughout the day. I'm always in my head, and take brief moments to reality when I need to.
I am also a total wreck and lazy and unmotivated and horribly addicted to dopamine. I just have a job that allows me to do it without getting in trouble.
Honestly it sucks. I don't feel like I'm capable of working an actual job anymore. It's like my mind is too far gone.
Keep your mind active even if it's on boring work. Look into finding new work in the meantime. I get your anxiety but you're further ahead then someone like me who found a job that let me quit trying.
I'm like this. You hate your job so U perform badly but you're too scared to change.
"if I could get rid of 90% of your job, what's the 10% that you would keep?"
The money.
the pay
It’s good to have a co-worker to bounce off of just to make sure you’re still grounded in reality when things seem unrealistic or unreasonable…Just be careful who you confide in and commiserate with in any job.
It truly does. I thought I was loosing my mind when I could see all the problems in management. Complained and got gaslighted that I'm the issue. It wasnt until a co worker told me the exact same problem company has and the people who pretend to work are the favored ones. That's when I realized it was me not doing enough.
I am a 17 year old who had just graduated high school and found myself working at a warehouse between friday till the end of the week, 10 hour shifts. Often times i forget how much i hate this job until the next weekend rolls by and im sitting there the night before just hating the fact that i have to get up and do the same old 8 - 6. I want to do something else but i am afraid that it would be a worse job than the one i currently have. I also dont want to bear the shame of having to tell my mother that i quit without finding a new job. My mother always says "ce'st la vie" when i complain about how much i absolutely hate my job. She tells me "thats life", and it kinda makes me feel alienated as if i am weird for hating my job and that i just have to deal with it. This reinforces the whole "this is gonna be this way forever" and that "all jobs are meant to make you feel misrable" and ultimately, it makes me feel like absolute shit.
I know someone like that. They happen to not work and spend their days by the pool living off daddy's and husband's money.
Save money up, find a different job while working for that job once everything clears work there and if doesn’t work stick with that job while looking for another until you find one that works for you. I’d recommend finding passions outside of work. That make work not the only thing.
Your rationalizations are all fear-based. We only get one life to live. if you hate something, you've got to figure out how to get out of it. Even if it doesn't work out, at least you know you tried and then you get to try again.
oh man working in a warehouse, as order picker or packer was like the worst job ive ever done, true misery
For how long were you working at the warehouse ?
How was it?
@@MrDominatord7 about a year
@@gj9157 bad ,repetetiv, robotic
I just quit my picking job today. 2 months of that shit is physically hurting my back shoulders and wrists, so I'm out.
I enjoyed the job I had despite it being nothing more than entry level retail work in which I was eventually promoted, because the people around me were so great, and the work was manageable. Then all of them left/promoted/retired and my life was a living hell. It's interesting to me because on one hand, maybe their departure exposed how bad things really were. On the other hand, bad management ruins any establishment fast. I'm part of a growing line of people who left the business because of the superiors.
It's weird being back on the labor market after so long. It's like getting out of a relationship after nearly a decade and having to learn how to date again.
Great vid. I've been working most of my life now. I've worked shitty ones and I have a good one now. The trick to liking work is just trying to have fun and keep a good attitude. Remember nothing is personal good things or bad things. Also, for the corporate types, don't just go for the most money. Go for the best manager. Money is a detail but your manager can set you back years or push you forward into something better you never imagined.
every job i've had was violating some regulation or another. always involved making workers do things the business is not allowed to make workers do. im willing to deal with even that, if you just pay me enough to remain alive while doing the work.. i dont understand how anyone can justify paying people less than what it costs for those people to BE ALIVE.
America is a slave/penal colony.
Wage Slavery, it always will inspire sufficient desperation, in order to
tax you for being alive. And the
Debt is always to follow requests from a manager that never can truly care about you
I went through job hopping to find a great job and one i liked, Took like 5 years and ruined my work history but finally found one that i love and is the highest paying ive ever had. Don't give up doods
Cool man what do you do for a living?
@@reptilesgamers00 Onlyfans
some of the best choices ive made in the workforce was deliberately disregarding my parent's advice.
Their advice to me was "never say no" and to keep my head down, do good work and don't complain.
while on the surface that may sound like good advice, I was able to improve my overall happiness by just... asking for what I wanted. And because of that I rarely worked weekends, had a semi consistent schedule, (as much as you can have in retail) and switched departments to one I liked better than the one I was hired for.
There is so much potential in just asking for what you want. You're not going to get fired for asking.
yes
That’s good advice from your parents. Note for onlookers: just because some of your best decisions are from neglecting this advice doesn’t mean that it’s bad advice if it works most of the time. I know, personally, I would have pissed off a lot less people if I did my work and didn’t complain
I think the lesson here is knowing your boundaries and having self respect. You need to know where you stand and when people start crossing a line, by being disrespectful or asking you to do more when it isnt part of your reporte. Yes knowing when to say no for solid reasons is good but saying yes can also open possibilities to new positions new contacts more flexibility.
I'm ngl tho, it wasnt until I started acting like a b complaining that I started to get more respect around me. That's truly unfortunate you have to be that way in a toxic working environment otherwise you'll get eaten. But if the working environment is functioning I dont see how saying yes a few times is bad for honest work
On the contrary. I know several people who have asked for not even a pay increase just additional roles. My brother wanted to automate some stuff in a role he was in and explained he wasn’t fulfilled with his current role alone. Got fired weeks later for COVID layoffs while several people who were objectively worse at his job than he was held their positions. Because he expressed discontent. Be careful!
@@benjaminchen8857 sounds like your issue is more finding balance in what’s a reasonable hill to die on and what isn’t in the workplace. Most people have been given a speech like the one my parents gave me and follow it religiously, to their own detriment.
At the end of the day there are those whose live to work, and those who work to live and when you decide which of those you are it will define a lot of the boundaries you feel comfortable setting in the workplace.
00:03 Tips on how to not be miserable at your job
05:02 Understanding the nature of misery in a job can help reduce misery and pave the way for a better job.
10:47 Being aware of cycles in relationships and jobs is crucial for personal growth.
15:41 Adapting to your job is important
20:20 Different people have different preferences for job variety and consistency.
25:08 Finding enjoyment in your job through autonomy and simple labor.
29:21 Adjusting dimensions of your job can make your experience better.
33:53 Don't suffer alone, reach out and connect with someone at work.
38:06 There are several key things to consider when dealing with job misery.
42:36 The importance of accountability and progress in psychotherapy
This video just made my day whole lotta better. I work online, its like this whole day ive got not a single soul to talk to. I have never been wanting this office drama, coffee room break environment so badly in my life. I have to look for a work that I can meet people, even if it pays less or with a fucked up schedule. I need social activities in my life
No,you dont.People are just stressful.
@@animal79thecat They're not inherently stressful, you just get stressed around them
Where do you work? I'd love to escape people
Wow, the grass really is greener on the other side. I would give anything for a wfh job
7:36 Wow, this makes so much sense. Any time I'm injured or very sick, there's definitely a feeling that it's going to last forever 😂
Granted, I live in the Netherlands, and I know we have quite a lot of safety nets. However, my plan is to literally do "move from job to job". I've done customer service for a year, and I know I'll never wanna work 8 hours a day ever again taking phone calls one after another constantly. That is not for me. So now I'm looking at maybe chat support. yknow like customer support but just chatting online. That seems alright for now. And if that isn't enjoyable, I'll maybe try to do some freelance work and see. Or I take a bootcamp study in smth like I.T. if I can afford it to see if maybe that is smth for me.
Now, I know what is for me. It's music. I love doing music, I'm thinking using platforms like Artlist to make passive income from songs whilst also releasing my own music. Is it a small success chance? Yes. But outside of that, I just gotta look for smth that is alright to me no matter what
Thats nice man, I am jealous. I lost what I thought was my golden ticket into my field of IT during the pandimec due to mental health issues and been barely paying bills going from contract work to contract work while going to online college fulltime. It feels incredibly stagnate and like a spiral, but I am glad to hear there are people out there that still have the freedom I wish I had. I am sure I will get there one day.
Now it makes so much sense why you don't understand why so many chatters are locked into shit jobs. In America, you take what you can get if you want healthcare, if you want social welfare due to the BS means testing built into the system, you take 30-40k debt to go to fucking college. You have no labor protections.
@@BPGwynn I assume you live in the US? Are there any financial aids you can tap into?
I have always found amazing that people are simply capable of changing jobs so quickly and so easily.
I mean you gotta find a job before you can hate it. Everyone's telling me there's a labour shortage, but I've applied to dozens of jobs and all of them have dozens if not hundreds of applicants.
Fucking economy
Warehouse always hiring
Casinos always need people who can pass a background check
I mean, per obvious, the internet makes it so applicant are multiplied by the hundreds for about any job.
That’s just a result of the ease of finding jobs and applying.
It doesn’t necessarily means more people are entering the labour force lmao.
The world is changing and no one knows for sure how to deal with this shit.
Again with the videos I need at the right time. Been contemplating leaving my job the past... like 3 months and it is true that you can make adjustments and see if it gets better for you - i expressed towards my boss that I was planning to leave and she spent some time with me making adjustments to things and exploring new options.
You also do adapt. You may not get any better but it's not as horrible as the first week on the job.
the people you end up working with is the biggest wildcard. people who micromanage, make decisions on my behalf without even knowing what it is i actually do or bothering to ask, push unreasonable deadlines down our throat, don't understand or acknowledge issues with management, are unwilling to accept mistakes of any kind, and who never are satisfied with the work being done have been the ones who make me miserable.
LMAO 15:45 Dr. K is basically like “I know you hate your job but what I learned from people in prison is that you’ll adapt.” 😂😂 Great analogy tbh, Job = Prison hahahah
Not funny when you realise hes telling trhe truth
I'm missing the part where this is hilarious :/
its sad that we have normalized slavery
@@markventure2745 And even sadder that you guys still listen to shills like Dr K who is literally trying to convince/manipulate you guys into loving and/or tolerating your shackles
Fuck that
@@markventure2745 True, although it was normalized thousands of years ago. What's more sad is our failure to abolish it - instead we just changed its conditions (e.g. USA's Thirteenth Amendment)
I actually love these videos. And I’m very anti authority and find it difficult to talk to a therapist. This helps a lot to love in the right direction in life
You have one of the most intricate ways to think about life (I was trying to come up with a better word than life, but then I just thought-heck, why not-life) out of anyone I've heard on RUclips. It's truly at another level and makes me ponder life in a deeper way than I thought was previously impossible. Anyways, don't want to ramble on...I would love to hear your take on how things like "finding your purpose in life" or "finding ways to force oneself to get through a major part of life-work" ties in with the monetary system. I feel like I do know loads on the monetary system from spending 100's of hours watching videos, listening to podcasts, reading articles etc. but I'd still love to hear any thoughts you may have on that (even if you have less knowledge about it than some other people spending their lives focusing on it), as your level of thinking on these issues would lead me to think that your thoughts would definitely be of value. If you're unsure about this particular subject, I'd love to start a conversation about it, just to have some good banter.
Listening to this while I go for my daily walk at the job i hate LOL
It's over for jobcels
@@gj9157 Jobs only want 6'0+ men so you can reach the top shelves. Rigged system
I feel like I achieve more in games than in real life becuase in game, my achievements are somewhat simple to understand and feel happy doing so. With Irl Its the opposite.
I feel you completely on this. You put in the work and complete your task in games and it feels good cuz you are being fairly compensated with loot or etc. when it comes to real life you barely get that fair compensation, no matter how well you done the job and if you did everything right. It’s truly insufferable.
The common theme below, with myself included, is that most people start off having good relationships with coworkers, actually like their job to an extent. Then those coworkers leave or retire, and either they aren't replaced or they are replaced with new people that are just different that you don't get along with. Coupled with this new normal of dumping as much work as possible onto someone if they are a good worker. And coupled with limited promotion/ job growth opportunities, and stagnant pay. That's why people are hating their jobs right now. I think the only ones that like their jobs are the young ones that are naive.
I wouldn't be surprised if the f'ing elites and VPs also hate their job for the constant expectation to achieve growth year after year, or putting a spin on the positives of why it's ok to be performing poorly with losses, and explain the get-well plan.
This is exactly what’s happening in my job rn 😪
Really resonate with that dumping qork on a good worker, yesterday I was doing tasks nonstop because people kept asking me for help despite the fact 2-3 other people where in the kitchen as well. Like they saw a manager ask me to do something and then they all jumped on it smh 🤦 couldn't wait for my shift to end.
@@decidueyezealot8611 Same. I almost wanna do deliberately badly at a job, so I'd get less responsibility, but I don't think my perfectionism would let me!
Managers seems to enjoy the pressure, and mistakingly believe that someone performing well means that they are a 'go-getter' wanting to climb the ladder. Dude, some of us just want a quiet life, but happen to be a conscientious worker. Leave me be!
There is some kind of stupid obsession with doing everything beyond perfect, to the point it affects people negatively. But we must "always strive to go above and beyond". I don't understand why "good-enough" is never an option. Most jobs I've hated have been with perfectionist, micromanaging bosses.
Do what works for you say no. But do the best job you can if they don’t promote you, they weren’t going to anyway.
Sometimes, it’s the job itself that intolerable. Other times, it’s the people who are intolerable. The latter is more controllable than the former, though it’ll require some work.
Nah I can handle the job but if one person or manager is Mean then I get mad.
It's really interesting listening to this considering that sometimes I get myself thinking about my job. I like the video, there's a bunch of things said there that I've been learning/realizing about my job and it's cool to reinforce it and hear from someone that understands the kind of stuff that we are not really taught.
Thank you Dr. K. You are helping me in the right direction. I can’t wait to get on meds again, and have therapy. It’s a struggle and it’s painful. The lessons you are passing down are a gift I could never imagine. I’ve been taking notes and trying to memorize these lessons. I am guilty of binge watching some of your stuff, but I’d rather do that than mindlessly scroll through tik tok and instagram and fap to garbage. It would be a pleasure to meet you one day.
12:00 this is so underrated. As I recently moved from mid to senior developer I now experience the joys of recruitment. And too often I need to ask "what were you doing in this period?" and hear "oh I just worked retail its nothing worth mentioning." Really not worth mentioning? The fact that you managed to work while studying or wanted to work during holidays. Or even just worked somewhere while not being able to find work that you wanted. All these are super valuable because they show your determination. Remember. On your cv: any job is better than a hole. Especially during covid people just have a gaping hole for a year or more. At least plug in freelance and think of all the times you helped your boomer parents with their electronics. Anything is infinitely better than nothing.
I hate hustle culture, I don’t want to be part of a system of 9-5, there’s more to life than being work oriented. My life’s purpose is to be there for people and be the best friend, partner, sibling I can be.
Ok but how are you going to pay your bills
@@soph4002 I’m simply saying hustle cultures toxic, you may do everything right in life and still end up wasting the only 70-80 (at best) years of your life hardly making enough to where you don’t have to even worry about financial ruin and how that can impair your freedom to a healthy thriving life.
Secondly it’s disappointing seeing how many people are indoctrinated into this life of hustle and consumerism, yes I partake, yes I’ve worked many jobs but that doesn’t mean I have to like the fact that I do. I think it’s a silly fucking system we created for ourselves.
As a species we I feel as we failed collectively as we’ve created a world of greed and materialism. So many of us condoning the very thing that most likely contributes to a lot of mental illnesses.
@@skyemccuien2998 fair enough, I agree with you. I interpreted your comment a bit differently. I think there are some fulfilling jobs out there, it's just hard to find the one that fits, especially since we choose a career direction too young. Good luck to you
@@soph4002 I have a house paid off and I just need 5k a year for property taxes. I like what he said being there for people and being a friend sounds like a more fulfilling life than being a corporate slave backstabbing coworkers for that promotion.
@@skyemccuien2998 YES American culture is becoming way too materialistic.
Ok, the notion that you'll get a better job from your crappy job, is a load of bunk. Most jobs hire based on either experience or interpersonal connections, meaning the only thing your crappy job is likely to lead to, is similar crappy jobs that is most likely equal or worse. How skilled you are at the crappy jobs is irrelevant, because most of them aren't based on any serious skills, to begin with; that's why they pay you by the hour, because your labor is primarily a function of time spent there.
To be honest, I had been watching another RUclips channel called "A Life After Layoff" saying that spending a long time working for a company is BAD for your career.
That is why you should be upskilling yourself in your chosen career/profession every opportunity you get, as well as the "free agent" mindset.
The consistency vs. chaos (variety) got me. I like a bit of both in my jewelry career. I greatly value consistency, in that I can show up, sit down, and work without interruption. However, working on the same styles of jewelry all the time gets to be boring and unimaginative. Very little space for me to feel personally creative, paired with the frequent interruptions that come from jobs that need to be done right away because the customer decided to wait rather than come back later, are the two factors I can identify that cause me to feel poorly.
I worked as a Chef for 4 years at 4 different places and listening to podcasts during prep was my favourite thing. Much wisdom to learn from this video!
It's the managers most of the time that be tweaking. Cool co-workers will make you bare with it but it seems everyone is miserable now
You know what Dr K? I start my therapy session tomorrow because I hate my job 😂🥲. And your video pops out. Speaking of the timing, yours is divine!
honestly being able top miserably pull yourself to work on a consistent basis is a luxury. when I work I get mad depressed to the point of not being able to get out of bed after a week or two of working. It's the worst, I do want to help but I feel like I don't have the necessary facilities to be helpful.
personally I think it comes down to cost of living.
You work your ass off and at the end of the week of toil, eating other peoples shit, you've got enough tokens to keep yourself alive and pay rent (usually someone elses mortgage).
but don't stop because you've got to do it again next week.
and if you don't eat enough shit and smile as you do it, you'll be threatened with homelessness and poverty.
rinse + repeat
Yes if the cost of living was very low like $800 doller rent while being paid $20-25 as a nurse that would be a great deal. If you have roomates that would be even better.
Really wish I saw this 2 weeks ago. I quit my job where I was (mostly) happy to start a new job that paid more. Turns out the new job was awful and I couldn’t make it 2 days there. It was too late to get my old job back. So now I’ve lost both opportunities. :(
All “normal” jobs suck. That’s our punishment for being average, I guess. The only way to find happiness is by being self-employed and that requires incredible amount of talent, confidence and luck.
Honestly, after watching through all the membership videos to date, this video spoke to me in a profound manner. Thanks again dr k
I worked in warehouses in hellish SoCal heat for a decade, boys. Now, I work from home doing tech support and am far happier and more comfortable. You can get out of it! Keep going.
These are nice things to think about for young people early in their working lives, but I wonder what suggestions there are for adults a decade into a well paid work in tech who have zero respect for the organizations in general. They're all much less than the sum of their parts. People are great and smart yet the companies are pitifully run and ethically pathetic.
Thank you for this. I've been out of the official working world for a while and I'm preparing to jump back into the rat race. I've been very anxious about it and I cant say you've completely removed my anxiety but you have definitely given me more tools I can use when I'm struggling.
I just finished up my 2nd week at a new job. I had about 10 months off. I spent the last 3 months preparing, just getting rid of addictions and improving general health and fitness. I was very calm about it all and got the first job I applied for. It helps to trust that if it happens good, if it doesn't happen, also good. Their loss, right.
I literally just searched "Dr K crappy jobs" on RUclips because I had another anxiety attack before work this morning. What the hell Dr K..? What kind of Vedic magic is this?
He's in your head
Psychiatrist here: EMR+Insurance = your job will ALWAYS suck. And people wonder why everyone leaves for private pay…
This video was exactly what I needed. Extremely helpful straightforward information. Info that I can apply to my own process of figuring out what my next steps are in my career hunting process. Thank you so much!
I personally went through about 5 years of shitty jobs. Saved money, like 5k a year. Invested in stocks and crypto(becareful with this ponzi asset) and now I'm able to sell cover calls for stock options. Make 7k to 12k a month. I still work but part time. I control my life now. I don't need to work(I only work because is actually very chill and pays decently)
I really hated working because I was usually too good at any job I had. Not trying to brag but I'm just a natural hard worker. Eventually all of my bosses would just dump work on me while letting my coworkers slack off, but yet we got the same exact pay? So of course, me being able to handle lots of work, I always decided to climb the ladder at any job place so then my bosses feel threatened and they eventually fire me because I became a threat to their position.
I work for myself doing work online now because I'm disabled with lymes disease. But the jobs are so competitive now days, do enough to not become too reliable and to not be a threat, but don't hold back so much you get fired for having no value. Jobs are screwed now days and everyone's mental state is so strange in the job force. The good employees get screwed while the bad ones get promotions and raises based off their family connections, appearance, workplace friends, and other bs.
YES if you do such a good job then the manager might be threatened and get mad at you lmaoo
i feel like an isolated alien. im 30 and still feel like a child of some sort. i am barely even taking care of myself now. im getting my father to pay for sessions.. it all feels so complicated to me, despite having done therapy for months, and trying to train to grow, the best i can do is level myself or go overall downward. it feels like my brain squelches itsself into pain whenever i really get into it. i used to have a habit of emotional stoppage to try to keep myself from showing feelings as i was growing up, idk how much its affecting me now, esp since ive been trying to allow myself emotions.. but its so much.. its always been too much i think, cause food addiction and responsibility avoidance started very early and has not been healed. i feel more unreconcilable the further i go. im such a slow learner and i know its cause the part of me that doesnt want to stop doing things like this has such a strong grip.. i never got the help i needed and now i regret even growing older just cause i cant reliably get the help i think i need now. that thought process/addiction system seems to out meta everything else that i learn thats good for me.
Hey, its been 6 months since you posted this comment. How are you doing now? Do you still feel the same?
@@potatoking2217 yeah, I’m here relating to this wondering the same. Also in my 30s and finding it hard to do anything. I know I need to go back to school but I feel too old
Man this feels so relatable even for myself at only 22 years old. Hope you're doing well.
last year i got a job at walmart in ogp, I was stoked when i first started as I was morbidly exhausted of my cycle of inaction (toking, games, porn, awful diet, general lethargy). ready to finally have a proper routine.
months go by I become horribly ill with resentment, in every way unappreciative & heedless.
for the last month I was there I started to accept it & realized it was all about how I chose to feel about it, you can go in miserable or you can try your hardest to be happy. the latter is sufficient for your well being
days away from getting my attendance points reset (they reset every 6 months), I get blindsided by the flu, making it my first time being sick in years. not having enough points to cover the days, I rested at home with the thoughts of possibly losing my job subtly sprinkling in. I go to the doctor, get a note, scoop myself back up with a mental rusty spoon & come back in the next scheduled day.
hour into workin, get a call on my phone from my tl to come to the back office. flailed my doctors note around like my castle just got sieged by the cumans & at last, I get inevitably fired.
it was my first true lesson on why you should always be grateful for what you have, routine is the best drug against depression.
I really needed this rn. Ty
Love Dr. K talking about his ice cream job. I feel like everyone eventually has that one minimum wage job that they actually really enjoyed
I havent watched the vid yet but ill share my two cents. Ive worked a lot of shitty jobs, and i mean really shitty minimum wage work in barely legal conditions. RN Im in a career i actually enjoy and its night and day from my first few jobs.
I have hated almost every single job ive ever had, but the only ones I havent hated are the ones I can do for money and that dont have a toxic work environment. You cant quit just because of toxicity its a reason to quit not the reason to quit.
You have to find out what kind of work you are compatible with, You might love to cook but you might hate it as a job. Unfortunately the only way to find out is by first hand experience.
1:00 "I always work my hardest" might already be the problem. Even if you like your job, this might not always be the best idea. You will probably work better than if you didn't work your hardest that day, but your average will go down a lot when you're just exhausted and start feeling miserable.
I've been having this issue lately myself. I have an amazing position in a solid company doing work that I'm naturally good at and making great money, but the latest projects, staffing changes, and management culture has been genuinely soul crushing. Issues that I tried to call out years ago are finally coming to a head, responsibilities beyond my role and experience level are piling up, and it feels like we're headed for a cliff that no one wants to acknowledge.
It's been causing me to wake up with panic attacks. These are issues in my specific group and particular projects that we're not equipped to handle, so it's not the company or general role that's killing me - it's the current situation. Leaves me in a shitty spot since I know that leaving would be an immediate relief, but I'd effectively have to start from square 1 making half as much as I do now after spending the better part of a decade making it to this point.
Did you try being honest about it to your manager? Something like that was also happening at my company and I was getting closer and closer to burnout. At some point I just told my manager that I was having a hard time juggling so many different things. They immediately asked how they could help and started either redirecting the work to someone else or said it was fine if I dropped a few things. Turns out that managers often don't realize you're drowning since you keep saying yes and you deliver. You're the one that has to let them know when it's too much. Generally they will want to help you because having an employee burn out is not good for them either.
Dr K is a mind reader lol. I was dealing with this lately, I'm working minimum wage, but I'm trying to get a full time 9-5 job soon. Happy Wednesday everyone
I just have really bad anxiety when I’m at work. I walk in everyday and since I work at a lab, there are a lot of different things that us student workers need to do. So I usually don’t know what I’m going to be doing that day, and there is a new thing for me to do a lot of the time and I am very worried that if I mess something up, then people might think that I’m dumb and that is my worst fear when I’m at work, so every time something gets explained to me I worry that I’ll mess it up, I don’t fully listen and then I mess something up. Its like I just choke in everyday work life and it’s not that I can’t understand how to do something, I just panic and don’t listen or I forget out of over panic and fear from judgment. I just need help on working on not worrying about what people think of me or about me failing.
Same! My anxiety is stopping me from being calm enough to be productive and when coworkers say its simple, just do it it makes the anxiety worse. Been trying to plan but really need to work on it to form that habit.
Currently reflecting if I should have a career change and this pops up on my recommended.
Damn I get so intimidated by the topics of jobs bc I'm unemployed and extremely bad at almost everything work related, mainly due to my mental health, and to fix it I need money, for which I need to work... Thankfully I have Dr k and others' videos on mental health stuff so I can help myself even if a little bit
The best days at my old job were the ones that I got done everything I set out to do during that day. The worst days were the ones that everything wasn't going well and more problems showed up... btw I find it really hard to understand my preferences, its like Im always in "third person mode"...
I relate to that last feeling a lot
I used to love my job, until my boss passed management to this guy, who I not only he doesn’t bring enough stock of things people buy, but he want us to force people to buy things they don’t like. Then, every-time we’re making more money on commission they change it, and every time we’re getting paid less and less, and they even took our chairs away! We don’t have a lunch room, and spent 10 hours standing? Like I’m looking for something as close to me, but damm is it hard to enjoy it
Unionize
Personally, thanks to the pandemic, I believe the best job nowadays is remote work, which companies are trying to take away by returning to the office to go back to "normal" (workers were doing well working at home during the pandemic) or depending on some jobs, some managers become overly controlling online, but if it's a good team/communication, as long as you get work done, that's the best job, because they respect the work you do and know you will get the job done without micromanaging you all the time. I am just starting out in my career but I love working from home, I get feedback from the team but I feel like I am in full control. I get to work and be productive for a certain amount of hours, and then I have free time for learning a new skill, self care, cooking in the kitchen, some time for exercise, finally having time for fun hobbies like video games or binge watching shows/movies, or getting extra rest at home, etc. Remote work IMO has been such a blessing in many ways. I save money from commute and more time and energy for myself, and spending more time with my family. It's going to be so hard to transition to a physical work environment if I apply to a different job in the future post pandemic because remote work showed me the alternative to working, I love working at home. At least if I'm gonna go to a physical environment to work, I want hybrid, some days in the office/studio and other days remote at home. I want a career but I also need balance and have time for myself as well. Before college I used to work in retail for minimum wage to buy school supplies and the manager treated me so awfully in front of customers, I was so embarrassed but I just did what she said and make sure I did my job in retail, but that was the worst time of my life, it made me so down and with a loss of energy. It pushed me to finish my education to pursue jobs with better pay, flexible schedule, and a better work environment.
Being physically disabled [legally blind] means my pool of jobs is severely limited.
Also having higher anxiety levels than a normal person means call centers puts me in a really bad space.
So it's difficult for me to find work both on site and most work from home. So I feel pretty stuck.
Been working at a hotel front desk for almost 3 years and felt pretty ambivalent towards it for most of my tenure.
Just 10 minutes in and I’m loving it. I don’t dislike my job, I absolutely freaking despise and loathe my job.
But I took it to get a raise, and save enough over a year period so that I can quit and move far far faaaar away.
I hate this, but it has an endpoint and a purpose. I get massively overwhelmed and I’m very very convinced that this job isn’t really something one person can reasonably do.
But I now know what to avoid in my job search when I move. And I know how bad work can really get. (Undoubtedly there’s always a way things can get worse. But this experience was more then enough to teach me what to avoid.)
Point of my monologue is this, a lot of what he’s mentioning here are the only reasons I was able to make it this long at this job.
How should i bring myself to love the process of making my boss money, there is nothing to bring me joy from that transaction? Starting my own company is even more stressful and risky, for a short life i have on this earth, i don't see the reason i would want to have a business other than money, in which i am not interested. Only thing making job bearable is the aspect of me not dying and not being dependant on anyone
Fuckk I feel this deeply.
@@Fightookaishii I mean, i just realized i described alienation in that comment, and judging by the vast literature written about it, even in the 21st century (bullshit jobs, e. g.), this is a common trend
I love my retail job. 6-8 audiobook or your streams, 8-x webstore pickups, x-end helping something
I've thought about quitting my IT job to go stock shelves or work at pizza nova. I like your job because you dont have to take your work home with you. You can complete your hours everyday and go home to relax.
@@davidharrow9025 exactly. I have a process engineering degree specialization in analytic chemistry but I especially like the work culture in my store, like, every person. Even the bosses.
I got wrongfully terminated from my job about 3 months ago, it was the first job I loved going to work, it was the first job that I got promoted to the very top and helped me get over my insecurity about my adhd - I felt purpose, I went above and beyond for my employees (I was a dispensary store manager)
The owners allowed a new GM to come in, and he removed me because I was the only person who would be on to him (he later stole thousands of dollars of product, and really hurt the business)
the owners even re hired some of the workers who quit because the new management was trash, but nothing for me even though I pointed out this GM right from the start as being a fraud...
I have been more depressed and suicidal then ever, what's worse is people around me don't want to hear about it anymore, so I have all these hurt feelings kept inside, and everyone just wants me to be a man and move on and be strong - ive tried 2 others so far, not only am I finding it physically impossible to do (I have blood cancer and makes physical work quite difficult) or I just get anxiety and stress and depression and my brains gets into a cycle how much i cant do this job and how much i hate it.
I truly dont know what to do anymore
I'm so sorry. How are you doing now?
Dr. K, I'm glad you took on this question even though it didn't have all the details you mentioned. I'm glad because my guess is that having an undesirable job is a very common experience.
12:00 is proof that you have control over what you say and how you react to things. From spending spending wayyy too much time on reddit I instantly anticipated the most toxic of a response here, but Dr k wielded his words to himself
Thanks for your lectures, Dr.
Kinda needed that validation that it's normal and ok to dislike working with people. Honestly, all my life I've been taught to try to work with others even tho I haven't liked it from a very young age and was held back in nursery school for not socializing haha. Always assumed employers want team players, but f it I'm a great worker, just leave me alone.
Your video helps a lot. Thank you.
I don't think im made to work 9-5 and I hate that
No one is man. Our way of living has become so backwards
@@jixster1566 ye... really it sucks
Tbh I can only do 5hrs interacting with people after that I need to recharge but that isnt possible with 8-10hr shifts
"If you ask you can sometimes adjust some things about your job". True, but first you need to prove you're a reliable employee who can get the job done without complaining. If you start a job and a week later you start asking them to change their workflow to accommodate you, it's not going to sit well with most employers.
7. is so important. I've been fired more than once for being "overly negative", but the freedom of being able to talk openly about problems at work gives me hope and inspiration to overcome them both for the benefit of everyone including the company, but sweeping them under the rug makes the job living hell.
It could be that if you're a practical problem solver, like an engineer, mechanic or a doctor, fixing things that are broken is what you live for, but if you're a bean counter all you see are things that are threatening the KPIs that determine your bonus and status in the hierarchy. That may be the source of a lot of friction between ICs and middle management, where an irreverent but uplifting and inspiring conversation for one sounds like pure negativity when overheard by the other.
i am the same way as OP. my answer is to find places and gigs that allow me to control my schedule. i still hate my job but they only require 4 hours a week. it has stopped a lot of the misery, there is of course still plenty while im there but the week in between each four hours max gives me a good amount of recover time but still. i know theres something better out there than this and i think its within me and idk how to change it so ill keep watching the vid now.
this was so helpful, watched the whole thing, thank u
Just watching this makes me more miserable feeling toward my job than before.
And here I am thinking how are people able to jump from job to job. Idk if it's an American or European thing. But jobs seems so easy to find. I'm just glad I was able to get an income so far.
If its a skilled job then yeah its easier, since your value generally should be rising
I just want A job. No one's hiring me. It's kinda sad. Might apply for unemployment soon cause I'm literally almost out of money for rent. '-'
Didn't realize it'd be this hard to get a remote job... When I lived in another state a few months ago, companies were actually begging me to work there. And now that I moved back home, where the population is much larger, companies are so picky.
My job isn’t the greatest but they do a lot for the employees that make it more rewarding to work there. Things like remote fridays, incentivized bonuses, holidays off, etc. the problem is shitty jobs don’t even do the bare minimum to motivate there employees.
Plz don’t give me that “WeLl iTs ThERe JoB”. The standard shouldn’t be get the bare minimum, expect the most work.
Thank you so much for this video, it really helped me alot
I AM the Boomer generation, born nearly 70 years ago, and I distinctly remember something along the lines of what I'm going to write below already being a cliche joke way back then.
The story goes: My grampa told me, "Oh, you kids have it easy. When I was a boy, we had to walk five miles to school -- uphill both ways."
Yep, it's true though - the generations before us did generally have a harder time due to technological and societal progress being made in the interim.
That being said, every generation faces different challenges. Maybe grampa had to walk five miles to school uphill both ways, but he likely didn't have to learn nearly as much at school to be "competitive" on the job market afterwards.
Finding a job with only a primary- or highschool education these days, which also allows you to support a family on a single income, is basically impossible, while grampa in many cases could walk in off of the street and get hired for a decent salary.
It feels like a bachelor's degree or trade degree is nearly mandatory for even entry level jobs these days.
@@kristianjensen5877 It is in western countries mainly that bachelor's and even now masters will become an absolute necessity to acquire jobs that are even entry-level jobs. Just graduated and I see many people applying for entry-level job that has masters on their cv's.
@@kristianjensen5877 YES back then you might had to walk 5 miles for a job but that job could support an entire family.
Your right, learning a trade right off of highschool is almost mandatory. A person out of highschool has three choices work minimum wage(go to community college),attend college(this days it's only the high income earners due to income inequality but if you are a good student you might not pay for it), or join the military.
That's what I thought where bad jobs lead to good jobs, but I've stuck with similar jobs for 6 years and it led to absolutely nowhere. In fact it just led to the same miserable job... but worse. Then I switched jobs, and it felt like I just reset that 6 years and just got stuck with more miserable jobs. So I just gave up. It's nice that you think bad jobs lead to better ones etc but sometimes it's just not the case. How can it logistically work that everybody can eventually get great jobs anyways?
Bad RNG need more rolls maybe?
This was truly helpful. I wish I'd known that years ago, when I was just making my decisions about college and having my first jobs.
been working in tech support for couple of months now.
Needles to say, I'm looking for a new job and I know I don't ever again in my life want to be on the phones and deal with customers
Most the time when someone hates their job, it's nto necessarily they'll hate any job, but that the job has more fo the shitty bits.
Out of 4, 3 of my previous positions I enjoyed. One of them I did not, partly because I enjoyed my previous roles more?