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going to try Silver I think, I never played Silver.

@@pokelosophy then crystal legacy, both of these rom hacks modernized the gameplay without altered the game unrecognizable levels. thus they would fit your content style i think

I’m playing Silver. I want to play what I want to play in the order I want to play. It’s because there is a certain thing I am introspecting about and it has to follow an order that makes sense to me. As much as I appreciate the insight it won’t align right now.

LOL so funny story... I forgot to save it so I am going to try and catch it again haha

And thanks for the kind words, yes I am going to start streaming more than record, I am trying to still save time. I think I got a concept.... "Gamer Standup Comedian Teaches Life through Pokmeon" or something lol

Thank you for your kind words, I know the episode was a tad bit controversial but I rather act honestly in the world and help people if the knowledge helped me.

Well of course they are coming from me haha 😂, I of course agree with that. Here is another way to look at it, the word comedy literally means take something apart and put it back together again in a different way. That’s what I’ve been doing, yes the meaning wasn’t there initially but how I put it back together, the act itself, generated meaning, I built the meaning. We’re saying the same thing. The meaning however was like new software code in my brain that actually changed me. I operate on the philosophy of how you do one thing is how you do everything, it’s not perfect but it’s good enough. Whatever “meaning” I introspected about and built in the game I put it in my life and it helped me. Pokelosophy, and this game was really about how to change one’s perception of the world, it did work for me.

@@pokelosophy That does make me feel better.

Two things. I do listen to you but our definitions of listen might be ever so slightly different. If you associate “listen” to “do what I say” then that’s an order. I listen and value your opinion but that doesn’t necessarily always influence my actions. My definition of listening is ensure the person is felt heard, but that doesn’t mean I have to act on their words. I encourage you to think about that in your life because I used to say “no one listens to me” but then I realized, “I don’t even listen to myself”. That’s when I realized I had to embrace myself. So please don’t feel like you’re not “heard”. You certainly are Jervis. Second, purely for intellectual curiosity, what is one of those JP rules you disagree with and which one do you think is backwards. I just want to hear where you’re coming from, perhaps I am wrong so maybe it’s important I hear your perspective because unlike others, you may have done the work which is what matters

@@pokelosophy "Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world" is not practical. Similar to your own rule about doing everything the way you do everything else, you have to work on both at the same time. If you wait to try to improve the world until you have your own affairs in order, you'll never do it. (Which may be the point.) "Pet a cat when you encounter one in the street" is just stupid. So is "Do not bother children when they are skateboarding" but for different reasons. If you encounter a cat in the street, it isn't going to let you touch it, and who would even address skateboarding children unless they already know them? And if they do, they might have plenty of good reasons to "bother" them. Most of these rules read as though they're designed to be profound, or at least sound profound, but when you think about them for any amount of time you realize they're either already common sense, or just not useful. I'd argue about more of them, but I've already been typing for 10 minutes. "Stand up straight with your shoulders back" is fine on the surface, but his reasoning behind it is exactly backwards. He talks about lobsters (and even states that we're just different lobsters) and says that if a lobster wins a fight it'll stretch out, and if a lobster loses a fight, it'll curl up. That if you project protectiveness, you look weak and vulnerable and attractive to predators, while if you project vulnerability predators will suspect a trap and avoid you. Well not only is that backwards in nature, but he concludes from it that if you stand as though you already have confidence it'll somehow give you confidence. You know, the same way spending like you already have money will earn you more money. You can't posture your way into more confidence; the posture comes from the confidence in the first place. He also has a rule about telling the truth, or at least not lying, which this rule violates if you don't already feel the confidence you're projecting.

​@@JervisGermane I agree with you in that a lot of his thoughts are common sense but even common sense is not that common. George Carlin has a funny bit about this lol but once again, I'll gently remind you, I think you're taking the rules too literally, they are merely metaphors for action. "Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world" I would leave it as "set your house in order", this is a good one in my opinion, it's actually rooted in the law of Entropy from physics and chemistry. Your'e right in that it's hard to balance with everything going on but that's what gives you energy to in the world. I wrote an essay about entropy here: medium.com/fiftytwo250/entropy-3884c1c49bab . For me this is the one rule that everyone should actually take to heart, this one actually saved me and made me a stronger person. It teaches you how to sort the world again and makes you more resilient. Huberman also has a soundbite about doing hard things as a way to mitigate cognitive decline and making you resilient, cleaning is awful LOL... I hate it but I have to do it. "Petting a cat" is a metaphor to find peace in chaos. It's not about literally finding a cat haha... For me, my "petting of the cat" is just sitting by the river or lake and enjoying the simplicity and beauty of life. Pretty simple, but to your point, common sense. "Stand with your shoulders back" / "If you stand as though you already have confidence it'll somehow give you confidence" this has actually been studied scientifically, it's the Superman pose. If you stand as superman for 2-3 minutes, it increases your testosterone and you become more confident, it's weird haha. Same idea if you smile with a pencil in your mouth, you become happier. The body has more neural pathways than the brain so what he is hinting at here, as well as a lot of literature in Hinduism like Yoga, is that the body and mind are DEEPLY connected. Fake it till you make it is a thing, I really hate to admit but it works! To me this should really just say "have good posture to maintain your health to act positively in the world". I also have a background in ecology and genetics, I loved the Lobster analogy (remember, analogy not literal) because of what I know about these systems BUT it's a TERRIBLE analogy for the mainstream haha... this is where he needs to realize his examples fall short. Same thing with the skateboarding, I get the point he i trying to make but terrible example lol, it should be "let the kid play with lego" or something haha

You obviously haven’t watched the full video if you said that. I was very specific about the context of his information and how it helped me, If you want to learn more about it, we can always do a video call so you can directly tell me how I should pick other people for my videos to my face. It’s easy to give feedback over text, try it in person or video.

The guy isn't a good person. I know there is a fallacy of not believing anything a person says because of one thing they believe but I don't listen to that man, period. Regardless of any good ideas he has he also believes in some of the most toxic ideas. He's a misogynist. I'll continue to watch your videos. And no, I don't feel like talking in person. But thank you for the option.

The only thing I will add is that some of his ideas from Maps of Meaning saved me from destroying myself. I’ll give credit where credit is due. The only reason why I offered a video chat is that if one can’t say their opinion in their own voice to the person, then it has little value. Something we should all, including myself, be mindful of as we take part on the internet. I think about this all the time as a standup comedian.

@@pokelosophy my opinion is my opinion. I don't need to vocalize it for it to have validity.

@@pokelosophy Getting away from religion did the same for me. Peterson, is not as smart or important as he thinks he is. I've heard the man speak enough to know I don't want to read any of his books.

Oh? How come? Yah it was in the heat battle, I wasn't thinking lol

@@pokelosophy Slash is a base-70 move with a high crit ratio, which means it usually hits with 140 force. Compare that to your Skull Bash, which hits with 120 and takes two turns. Besides that, your next move is Flamethrower at Lvl 46. You'll probably beat the game before then, so that means your Charmeleon probably won't see anything more powerful than what it already has now. But again, that's just me. I'm playing through Red again myself, and my Charizard is Lvl 50 with Slash, Flamethrower, Earthquake, and Cut. But you get the same W I do. There's no point in criticizing your method when it gets the same results.

@@JervisGermane ah that's good to know when I play Yellow lol

@@pokelosophy It looks like either you or RUclips took down all our subsequent replies. I don't appear to be able to email you. I thought everyone's RUclips email was their channel name at gmail, but that didn't work. I did use "Pokélosophy!" with the é and the ! I don't know if that makes a difference. In any event, if you'd still like to set up a zoom call, I'm dependent on you to take the next step. Lord knows I'd prefer that over having the same unproductive argument over and over in your comments section.

@@JervisGermane Hey Jervis! I just got this, weird. Let me get back to you on sharing contact details. I am just busy right now with some work but I'll definitely get back to you.

I am going to offer a different perspective. First off, you're too attached to the outcome due to other people as you mentioned. Who cares if no one watches the video. The only thing that matters Jervis is asking yourself... are you having fun making them and watching it yourself. That's the only thing that matters, you have to be your own best friend and cheerleader. I enjoy everything I put out and while I would love more people watching my content, it's become less important over time. I love everything I put out, it brings me such joy especially when you gently reminded me of those episodes with these new comments, I watched them and I smiled. So you brought a smile to my face this morning, you reminded me of how much I changed since the beginning of the year, a few things happened recently that both those episodes you commented on is weirdly what I needed to hear right now. I've never had so much fun in my life making videos. This is the true reward. Second, let me offer a different perspective. Sometimes the pressure is just about getting you to start (I know I wrote a whole book on it, search "The Last Self-Help Book You'll Ever Need" on Amazon) and that's what people want you to do, it's less about the actual video and more about the action. Starting is the hardest part. I've received some pressure lately on a few things but I viewed them as people cheering me on to do something I always wanted to do anyways. This only works if you have a clear goal, otherwise it's just noise. Jervis, you should give yourself a pat on the back to even upload videos, most people don't even get to this step. I haven't watched all of them yet, I watched a few that relate to my interests, I've just been in a bit of a hole lately so my focus has waned. Honestly, to me, you look like you were having fun finally sharing your opinion. Everything I learned about my introspection and even Pokemon this year led me to doing standup comedy. I had to force myself to be my own coach, cheerleader and best friend but I think that muscle was developed with Pokelosophy. I've never been convinced that "how you do one thing, is how you do everything". I met friends like you on the journey, it's been such a positive experience but it's all about perspective. You have full power over your perspective, no one else does.

@@pokelosophy I disagree. First, if I was attached to the outcome, I don't think I'd be regretting it now, because I did achieve my objective. "Who cares if no one watches"? Well certainly not me. I haven't even been back to check views or anything since I uploaded the last video. I don't even know whether anyone's watching. "Are you having fun making them and watching them yourself"? No. I hated the recording and uploading process, and I haven't watched any of them myself. I'm indifferent to everything I put out. I didn't do for me. I did it for y'all. That's why I regret it now. I didn't have any fun making videos, so I didn't get any reward for it. I'm glad you say I at least looked like I was having fun in the ones you watched. That means I am still capable of a believable performance under the right circumstances. Second, I don't care *why* y'all were putting pressure on me. I just did what I did to make you stop. That's what I mean when I say I achieved my objective. People were putting pressure on me, I caved, and the pressure went away. But I shouldn't have had to do that. "I don't want to" should have been good enough 10 months ago and it should be good enough now. Ease or difficulty was never the question; it was whether or not I'd do what I wanted to do or what I'd been told to do. I set aside what I wanted and did what I was told to. If you'd watched more of my videos, you might know how I feel about that. You describe this as a step, an achievement, something I should pat myself on the back for doing, but it feels like a loss. I didn't achieve anything, because the step I took was in a direction I didn't want to go. I have no problem being my own coach, cheerleader, and best friend, but I want it to be in an activity that I enjoy, not one that's been assigned to me. My wife and I discussed whether I should just delete them all as a sort of symbolic stand: "You may have pushed me to record and upload videos, but I'm the one with the delete button." I'm still undecided on that. I don't have copies, so if I do that, they'll be gone forever. So I won't do something I can't take back until I'm positive it's the right thing to do. I'm a bit weepy about this kind of thing right now anyway, because we've just passed 11 years since I quit drinking, which was another choice I made due to social pressure rather than because I wanted to. So when I decided I was going to listen to all your videos yesterday, it hit me pretty hard when I ran into another example of the same thing. If you think I care what the activity is, you're missing how my personality works. What matters to me is whether it's something I want to do, or something I've been told to do and then pressured until I caved and did what I was told. Sure, I got to choose the content and the format of my channel, but I didn't really get to choose whether or not to have one in the first place. All I had to do was mention that I'd been thinking about it, and the emotional thumbscrews came out. And here we are. You did something you wanted to do, for you; I did something you wanted me to do, for you. You're on to bigger and better things; I'm wallowing in self-loathing. At your insistence, we both jumped into the pool. You got a fun swim out of it; I just got wet.

@@JervisGermane Jervis, I am going to really candid with you. Your biggest issue is you don't know how to fail and treat failures as a win, that's why you want so much control. But each failure, even if it didn't go your way, comes with a whole set of positive lessons that you can apply. You tried something and it didn't work. Learn from it and then see what you can do for whatever you want to. Everything about your video uploading experience is a win to me. No loss. It's sad you don't see it that way. But I'll tell you why people keep "pressuring you" for anything, you probably talk about it all the time and never actually do anything so it annoys people and people get tired of you. So when they start encouraging you , you get annoyed. No one is FORCING YOU but you're interpreting it. The only reason why I know this because I was like this. I am 100% certain this is. your biggest problem. One piece of advice, only talk about things to other people that you INTEND TO DO. Otherwise keep the rest to yourself or focus on writing to sort the thoughts out. I only encouraged you to post videos because you said you had ideas but that was months and months ago. The world is lacking so much encouragement so I try to encourage everyone. But look, I let go and didn't mention it again. Then suddenly you did which was awesome, of course I was happy for you. Then you comment just above, "I did something you wanted me to do, for you". This is was all about you and now you're projecting that somehow this is about me? If you want perfect proof of how much you loathe yourself, it's that. You've tied your identity so much on what other people think that it's blinding you from the truth which it seems like you're finally facing head on. If you want to fix all your issues in life Jervis, treat yourself like the best friend you never had because I honestly don't think you've done the work to really embody that concept. A good friend always encourages the other friend and doesn't want anything else but his or her happiness. A good friend just wants to see you try new things if it may help you. You really need to change your perspective on what's "force" and what's encouragement and how this pressure you're facing from others is your own doing from a state of inaction. Do what you what, we just want to see you do something not just blabber about it, but think about how that comes across to others and what boundaries you cross when you discuss the things you want to do... most times, it's probably annoying. Like I said, I know what it's like to be on both sides of the fence.

@@pokelosophy You're right about some of that for sure. Maybe all of it. I don't know what to do with that. The lesson I'm currently learning is "Never engage with anyone." That's not helpful. It's not even possible. If I see or hear things, I'll form opinions about them. If I have opinions, I'll have anxiety until they're expressed. Once they're expressed, if other people don't like them, they'll criticize them. And if they do like them, they'll encourage me to act on them. Both of those will give me more anxiety. your encouragement sparked anxiety that couldn't be resolved until I gave in and did what you said. My identity is tied to skills and avoiding things; I think of myself in terms of what I can do and what I've managed to avoid. I think people who can do more than I can are better than me, and people who've consumed more pop culture than I have are more tainted than me, and vice-versa. I don't know what I can do about that. My temptation is to delete the videos and all record they ever existed. I tried something and didn't like it, so I better get rid of the results. I don't know if that's the right thing to do or not. Since I don't have a plan for action, all I can do is respect your wishes and stop blabbering.

​@@JervisGermane Jervis, nothing you said is uncommon or not normal. But you have flawed beliefs about the world, the idea that someone knows more pop culture is somehow better than you is ludicrous. I don't know anything lol, yes that might be a useful skill when talking to someone people but in most cases no. Context is important. You have a lot of running commentary about the world that is running in the background that needs to be evaluated and changed, only through routine exposure can you learn to navigate this. It's hard, I get it. I don't talk about the times I am literally crippled with fear and angry at bad comments. Over the years, you learn that people are just.... people lol. Let them be. Here is something i've done that may apply to you, for example I don't listen to my closest friends on how I do Pokelosophy. I've said no more times than I can count. It's no disrespect to them, they just don't know what's in my head and the only feedback that is important is how my videos do. That's it. I do what I want to do... and I use the comments and numbers to experiment and have fun. You can use that template for all aspects of your life. Figure out what you want to do. Aside from yourself, who else do you want to involve and keep a tight circle. I have rules on how to give me feedback. You care too much about other people opinion's... let it go or learn how to but creating a system like what I outlined just now. You're in full control of the noise that enters your life, no one else is responsible. Another important thing is that the human brain can't tell the difference between anxiety and excitement. You have to train the brain to understand the difference. It's the same neural wiring. This is something I am learning how to do, anxiety is okay but you have to learn how to be friends with it. As a standup comic, I know not everyone is going to laugh, I am terrified but also EXCITED to do my routine. It's hard to explain but it's both. This is what you need to work on, you need to work on navigating what warrants anxiety and what's just a ghost in your head. Honestly, you should be anxious but the question is, when is it ACTUALLY REAL ANXIETY or EXCITEMENT. Excitement is the anticipation of surprise, learn to be surprised. The brain is very plastic and anyone can change. If a stuttering boy (me) can start doing standup comedy Jervis, someone who was bullied and made fun of for not being funny.... then anyone can do anything if they really want to. All the bullshit is in your head because somehow the world has conditioned you to see yourself as a small weak person, you're not. Not in the slightest. I am the first to tell you, you're not. Keep at it. Whatever is in your heart, just follow it. It knows the way out. I promise.

What I see is someone thinking and reflecting and trying new things. I am working on this philosophy or mantra, because Pokelosophy started because I spent more time reading the guide book and less time playing as a kid, I didn't explore, make mistakes and try new things. Playing with my Pokelosophy method really made me realize how much you have to stop reading the guide book and trying to decide, and just get in the game. For a better way to look at it.... just hop in the pool! And that's what you did and a lot of people are really happy you took the leap :)

Oh no sleeping trouble, sometimes I wake up a bit early and I decide to wake up. I usually wake up at 4:30 to 5:30 am, today was 4:00 am and it's Saturday so my sleeping in was around 6 am, I woke up at 4 and just decided to play. Thank you, I didn't want to explore lol. I am excited for the next gym battle. Pallet Town right?

@@pokelosophy Viridian, the Earthbadge

Yup I figured rock type canon fodder was a good approach, I almost also added Rhyhorn but I had enough water pokemon to do damage.

Bless thanks :)

Skipped them for now. I will go back after Blaine. What I hope I demonstrate to everyone and you commented on this before in a past video, there is no "correct" way to play this game. You can win as long as there is some prep, some strategy and some luck. Just like life.

Great insight thanks!

All good sir! To be fair it was a challenge, I went through 4-5 iterations first. I knew I had an advantage with speed and electric attacks with Dugtrio when I tried it. I was trying to set up damage with everyone else, hopefully each Pokemon can land an attack and through that I found a pattern with Dugtrio, Parasect and Raticate and then experimented with those 3.

@@pokelosophy How much did you get that "You missed the pokémon" problem? I've never known how to get around it.

Oh yes all the time, I got the health down to at least 1/3, and tried to sleep it. If I got the miss, I would do a small attack and hopefully broke the cycle but then I would risk fainting the Zapdos. I wouldn’t say I got around it. I also kept throwing balls until something.

@@pokelosophy I watched a video of "lyra got a website" (iirc) the other day on the catching mechanics of gen1, and how broken it is. tldr, anything below 33% is basically useless, the successful Freeze (and sleep for that matter) is where the magic happens... and the pokeballs don't miss, that just means that the catch chance is below 10%, and once the ball catches it, it doesn't wobble first.

Thanks Jervis! I

HAHAHAHA I never even realized that. That's funny. Improv comedy is the best especially when you don't expect it.

Bless thanksI I subscribed to your channel. Congratulations :)

OH! I didn't know that. Good to know, I'll continue to make more videos regularly maybe that will tell the "algorithm" to cut it out haha :D

Thanks for the kind words! I think you hinted at something that might help improve the channel. Podcast style. Interesting.

weird I didn’t see it, I usually get a notification

@@pokelosophy It's possible it got flagged as spam because I mentioned I have my own videos up now (which you asked me to tell you) or because I referred you to a comment on a previous video about Toxic rather than writing the whole thing out all over again. I saw your video within two minutes of you publishing it, too, so if you took it down and reuploaded it or anything, that might have eliminated it.

@@pokelosophyThe other sections of my earlier comment were 1) Congratulations on making it to half way! It gets a lot faster from here on; there's much less game play between gyms than there has been. 2) You don't need to defend your use of Parasect, or switching to anyone else. You're winning just fine your way, whether or not it's the way any of the rest of us would do it. 3) Be sure you have your Jolteon learn Pin Missile when it can (lvl 43 I think?) because it's way OP in Gen 1: super-effective against psychic, ghost, poison, and maybe more, even though it's not supposed to be.

Oh that’s interesting. Mmm

thanks for the tips :)

Oh hi! Say hi to the fam jam for me :) best of luck with the new school year!

Thanks sir and yay! Let me know when you post it :)

Thank you Sir :)

Oh that's dope! Thanks for sharing that. All that was super helpful to understand. My next video is battling Koga :)

aw thanks :)

:) that comment made me smile. Thank you watching it. There is no right or wrong way, the only thing one should judge is if someone is setting a goal and trying to hit the target. You can use philosophy or not it doesn't matter. In my view, philosophy (and in turn religion) is just emotional management to understand life from the perspective that makes sense for you. The best life philosophy is action which is what you're referring to, this is the main philosophy of Hinduism, action. Just set a goal and do it. How you get there is up to you. You can read all the philosophy you want, but are you hitting your goals? I think our society overcomplicates everything and even modern philosophy is complicated for the layperson. Simple truths that help you move towards a goal is the most important, how and what those simple truths are can come in infinite forms. You're also referring to the Hermetic principles, of "all is mind". Everything is in the mind. That's how I view life, it's the story you tell yourself.

Thanks for this, missed your edits! :)

Absolutely! I plan to do Gold next, I'll be done Red in a few months. I've never played Gold, actually I haven't played any of them after Yellow lol... lot's new play for me soon!

@@pokelosophy i suggest to you play crystal clear instead of gold, its most authentic yet modern gen 2 game around

@@Qvmmy Is Crystal like what yellow was to gen 1?

@@pokelosophy crystal precisely emerald of gen 2 games and crystal clear is modernized and improved version of it without changing its original structure

Thanks Robyn :)

ruclips.net/video/hRzWhmV0jqg/видео.html I created a bulbasaur meditation video lol, maybe that might help? :)

Thank you! I think so too :)

Thank you for your kind words. I subscribed to your channel as well, I think it will be a good preview of when I eventually get to the other games. I watched a bit of one of your videos, I never seen these newer games and they look... different haha. I think I will limit my preview of these new games, I do want to work on being surprised (in a good way). But super impressed with your production quality! :) You gave me a few nuggets of inspiration. What video editor and animation tool do you use? I've been meaning to learn after effects.

@@pokelosophy Thank you for the sub! I've been excited about all the smaller Poketuber channels that have been coming up in my feed recently, it's very refreshing. And yeah you might want to avoid my content until you've become much more familiar with the games yourself first haha. There are too many spoilers in my videos, especially the walkthrough series I'm doing for each game in the first 5 generations. My setup is extremely simple at the moment. I started with OpenShot actually as my editor (free) and eventually moved to Filmora. Filmora is very similar to OpenShot in a lot of ways, just a lot better at getting the job done. I think I'll stick with it for now since I don't need a whole lot of functionality to produce the videos I make. And honestly that's it, I don't use any sort of animation program or tool yet, everything is pretty much a preset mostly, or I create a simple one manually using the basic tools within the editor. I would like to look into upgrading to something else myself one day though, just need to find the time haha

@@grumpygengar22 Thanks for sharing :) I'll take a look, I do want to keep it low fi, easier to scale when thing take off also polish doesn't always mean good.

That's a great lesson too! I am glad you were able to identity that.

Thanks sir! I'm putting out a couple of videos this week! Been taking a tiny break, I am on vacation :) and Happy 4th of July (early) :)

I took your following and use DUX as a utility pokemon. I haven't really thought about "basic" versus "not basic" to be honest lol, I am just building a roster to what I like and comes to mind. Gym battle is almost ready.

@@pokelosophy I was gonna edit my comment but you got to it first. I thought this was your next meditation video and was just going to leave a like and comment and leave, but I let it play long enough to hear you were speaking in your normal voice, so I ended up listening to the whole thing. When I thought it was a meditation video, I thought you'd skipped from Bulbasaur straight to Squirtle without doing Ivysaur or Venusaur. That's what I meant about doing only basic Pokémon. Farfetch'd being my favorite, I am curious. When you get as far as #83, I wonder what you'll come up with for my best boy.

@@JervisGermane ah makes sense and no worries! Yes I am planning an Ivysaur meditation soon. Those are good experiments for me because on my personal channel I want to do meditation videos

Speaking from experience, that behavioural loop your in is like sweeping dust under the rug, eventually you're going to have to clean it all up. You are the only person who is going to live with your own thoughts, you might as well treat it as your ultimate best friend. That's what helped me. Your best and only friend is trying to talk to you. Something to think about.

@@pokelosophy my bad I didn't explain very well. I get what you're saying, I have no issue being alone with my thoughts, I do embrace it the way you explained actually. My issue is with anything that I have pressure about. So like, I can be completely comfortable and relaxed and go to take a shit and everything could be going well, then it dawns on me that the only thing it would take to stop my body from doing this is getting a little worked up or anxious. So then I am anxious about the idea of becoming anxious which then causes my muscles to tense and my body just stops using the bathroom until I can get my thoughts focused on something else to avoid that self awareness. Similar to having to go to sleep with something important to do in the morning. It's not the actual event that causes me stress, it's just the simple fact that I know if I get a bit anxious I'll be wide awake for hours and feel terrible in the morning, and then that potential causes me to be anxious and then I can't sleep. Lol I have a pretty severe anxiety disorder too, I think the biggest thing is just getting with a good therapist, but I'm open to any advice.

@@cjsdizzy Thank you so much for taking the time to explain it to me. I have a lot of anxiety that I’ve learned to play “ninja” with, I’m still learning so not a black belt yet. “So then I am anxious about the idea of becoming anxious which then causes my muscles to tense and my body just stops using the bathroom until I can get my thoughts focused on something else to avoid that self awareness. “ 

What helped me was realizing the best “defence” is knowing that you won’t be 100%, all good sport teams know they are not 100%. I used to work at Best Buy and they budgeted 10% of items will be stolen so it’s in their budget. Same idea. You’re going to experience this regardless so you have to instead of fighting it, just go through it. Now what helped me the most was realizing, it’s easier to put out a “smaller fire” than a “bigger fire”. I realized a lot of my anxiety came from environmental triggers that are unrelated to the thought. For me it is caffeine so I am working on reducing my intake because while I’ll still have those thoughts, the “fires” are WAYYY smaller. Caffeine was gasoline on the fire, it just made things worse. So I recommend first identifying what are the obvious triggers that are not in your head and lear not manage those. Then I recommend just recognizing, "you know what I can’t stop my thoughts but have I found ways to put out the fires faster" There is something called TIPSS, temperature, intense exercise, paced breathing and progressive muscle relaxation. This almost always lowers the “fire” of the anxiety. In summary, I think to me, your battle is recognizing, these thoughts won’t go away but I can at least put out the fires faster by 1) reducing any fuel the fire may experience externally like people or substances and 2) when the fires happen, use TIPPs. www.mindfulteen.org/dbt/distress-tolerance/tipp-skills/

@@pokelosophy I appreciate it. Powering through it will make it easier and easier and I may never be 100% but that acceptance and working on tolerance will make it happen less and less. I've done that with others ways my anxiety manifests so of course it would apply here too. Thanks for taking to time to talk!

@@cjsdizzy Anytime you need some words of encouragement or tips, just pop a comment in the videos and I'll be happy to help. My social anxiety was really bad but I also realized, 99% of people are just as anxious about themselves. They are just as anxious as you, no one really cares. There is a scene from Schitt's Creek that demonstrates that: ruclips.net/video/FkXAutT_6Wc/видео.html "People aren't thinking about you like how you are thinking about you"