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the entire point of a marriage is religious so yeah if you dont want God in your wedding dont have a wedding. Cause even if its not a Christian marriage there religion in like all marriage ceremonies. In fact the idea of marriage here is actually based on Christian marriage largely so if you dont want God dont perform a religious ceremony. lol Just go to the state and have your civil union or whatever. it is different.

One of our teachers worked at local grocery store produce section, we would always ask him what was the 4011

@4:13= If you're not sure, doesn't that make you an agnostic (by definition)?

21:04 that's just Outright Fact. "Lobbying" and "Campaign Donations" are just legal terms to call the government-sanctioned bribery system so the people don't get upset. Also, when's the last time you voted on a decision made by a public official? That's right, never. The ruling class pays off the figureheads and tells them how to vote, and uses two-party conflict to distract everyone from the actual policies being enacted. As long as that idiot trump, or that pedophile biden, didn't vote it in, we don't care, when both parties are actively oppressing the majority of u.s. citizens so that their paymasters get richer.

15:36 oh absolutely. Even what little of the MK ULTRA project was released was MORE than horrible enough to be worse than 60% or more of u.s. government conspiracy theories, but the moment you mention the government doing ANYTHING wrong, or lying in any way, suddenly you're A tin-foil-wearing maniac. "The government wouldn't do that" is propaganda. They have made secret coalitions and altered public opinion via advertisement OVER MILK AND CHEESE. (Got milk?) Imagine what they would do for state secrets. They've admitted to having a HEART ATTACK GUN for Pete's sake, but nooooo, X political party would NEVER lie...

That the U.S. Government is hiding the fact that alien life is in the solar system. I know because I saw undeniable evidence of alien spacecraft in between earth and the moon with my own naked eyes, which means NASA DAMN CERTAIN saw it with their instruments, given the size of the damn thing.

My youngest brother came aout as pan, last year, im non binary, my middle brother is ace, and the youngest, ya know lol

Once heard a stand up comedian say, If you think someone is going to mug you, look them in the eye and say "how's your mom?". They will be confused enough to give you a chance to run away.

I ghosted a guy who rejected me. He wouldn’t leave me alone and made things confusing for me, it caused me a lot of heartache. We ended up being friends but I started developing strong feelings for him again and I mentioned this to him but he didn’t care. I knew things would get worse for me if I continued this so I ended up ghosting him. I think it really hurt him because he tried calling me and he tried chasing me by car, he didn’t have luck. We ran into each other at the gym and he tried approaching me after seeing me a couple of times at the gym, he was angry and I snubbed him and walked away. I think this made it clear to never speak to me ever again.

I was in a coma for 2 months..It was terrible..i guess because I was scared and was dealing with the hospital staff abusing me as a coma paitent and once i woke up..i was restrained and couldnt move anything but my head..it was terrible when you realize how helpless you are especially when you cant move and people just let your alarms go off and your respirator fail

So was *Professor Oak* the father of Ask Ketchum or what? 🤔

i just don't like kids and avoid them like the plague. also already too many kids in the system as it is.

Being outed against my will would have been devastating to me, devastating. When I did it this year (only to my mother and sister) I never felt so exposed and vulnerable... let alone being outed by someone else. Somehow, I think I may be outed myself by NOT dating a girl ever (That's the thing on having principles and morals, not wanting to involve an innocent woman in a lie) in my 44 years of life, and both of them knew due to that. They are ok, but I still have to deal with my father, and no, we won't have a father-son talk. No, he doesn't deserve that honor. I'll come out in the most spiteful way I'll ever think, but for now, we barely talk and that's it. Oh... I always been wary of going to therapists, and this seems to reinforce my beliefs.

In the Playstation 2 Version of Persona 3, while exploring dungeons, you could send out your party members to find treasure chests for you. Not only was it a profoundly dumb idea to do so on higher difficulties, where they have no chance against the enemies but also, when they find money inside the treasure chests, they JUST KEEP IT.

I didn't understand the pizza and french fry one. Were they just being goofy?

Teasing. I had a huge issue with being bullied as a child and no one in my family seemed to get that I didn't even like teasing, or that teasing seemed just as bad. No, instead they thought it was fun. I HATED driving with my dad for a long time and had to threaten to grab the wheel and crash the car to get it through his head that I didn't like what he was doing.

12:17 digging is fun, meth seems to make you act like a critter, makes sense to go dig

The gyno that did my c-sec was upset about having to miss his home owners association party when he did the surgery. He was in such a hurry he didn't suture my uterus correctly. After 24 i was allowed to get up my abdominal binder was soaked in blood i was still numb so i didn't feel it. When another surgeon opened me up my uterus and everything around it up to where the cut was covered in blood and clotted blood. I was told i needed so so many liters of blood

At 19:30... I literally just got down 10ish secs beforehand putting on sock, shoe, sock, shoe 😂😂😅

DON’T FRY BACON NAKED

Well, to be fair, gingers do steal souls 😅😅😅

My cousin told me the devil was after me because I had some bad luck a couple years ago.

Suffering odd hallucinations/memory loss/other similar cognitive issues all of a sudden? Check carbon monoxide levels!

I thought the head bobble meant active listening.

7:45 Made my heart stop for a moment. As I've been dealing with random kernel panics on my laptops. And (crossing my fingers), as of yet has not affected my main desktop. So the TTS freaking out for a moment made my heart skip a beat, as I'm on my desktop.

I work in the deli of a grocery store, and there’s a plastic wrap dispenser we literally use a couple hundred times a day. Normally, there’s a pin that holds certain parts in place, but one day it goes missing, it probably fell in the trash without anyone noticing. The dispenser is still usable, but it’s very wobbly and frustrating. One day I’m replacing the plastic wrap when I get a crazy idea. A pencil is just the right size to fit in the hole where the pin originally went, and it’s wide enough that it will be stuck there and not fall out. I wiggle it around, twisting and turning it until it’s secured in place. My manager is watching the entire time, and she doesn’t voice any objections until I’m done and she points out that the end is sticking out and will get in the way. I respond by simply asking her to pass me a nearby knife, which I use to saw off the end of the pencil. I was expecting it to break, or to be replaced by an actual pin, but over a year and a half later it’s still there!

I got myself fired from my first job as a Lieutenant. Homeosexual conduct policy officer and equal opportunity officer. The training brief I put together hit all the wickets and was very entertaining. The XO stripped me of the jobs on the spot. Made me the tactics officer instead. All I told him was he needed to give the job to someone who planned on getting out. Kinda one of the most important high risk things I ever did career wise and it worked like a charm. I don’t recommend it. I got lucky.

Night beat has me absolutely howling 😂

The fcking claw hands one made me laugh so hysterically my head is throbbing lmfao. Just the mental image is GLORIOUS.

every year someone dies near or on my birthday. 2 years ago my grandmother died on may 25th. 1 year ago my uncle died on may 6th. this year my cat died on may 4th. my birthday is may 26th.

My home ec teacher in middle school had a rule that you were only allowed to use the bathroom twice per semester in her class. Unfortunately I had her class right after lunch. One day, unbeknownst to me, I had my first UTI, and was having a really hard time holding it. I waited until I was sweating before I went to the teacher and told her I had to use the bathroom and it was an emergency. “Have you already used your two passes?” “Yes, bu-“ But nothing. Sit back down, you can wait.” I couldn’t. I ended up peeing myself in her class, and tried to hide it with my binder on the way to my next class. My English teacher was the best though. She noticed, and wrote me a note for the nurse. Mom came and picked me up and I told her what happened. She. Was. Pissed. After we went to the dr and had my UTI diagnosis, along with the doctors note, she submitted a hand written note to the admin that I was to be allowed to use the bathroom whenever I deemed it necessary with no exception, and that if any TEACHERS had a problem with it, they could contact her directly. My mom was such a bad ass for that IMO.

It took me 2 hours to watch this video. I was at work. Distracted. Watching other videos.

3:33 What in the 22 Jump Street???

Guys can have breast cancer?!

I used to have a terrible job in my past. I where part of the union as well. The company also supported the union. In the collective agreement I found a loophole. Usually you get a paycut if you're late to work. The loophole allows you to get fully paid wage if you're late to work for any or no reason. Before I quit my old job, my last year there, I used that loophole. Now at my good job, I don't use that loophole.

I really like it when girls wear leggings or thigh high socks. Basically the higher up they are the better. Also oversized t-shirts. Very nice.

How I get a hold of things they don't approve of 😅

If you're 19 and have a car and a job. Youbare not poor¡!!!!!!

What usually got us going at every family get together was the mental and physical abuse me and my sister endured for years

14:10 No need telling the daughter. Telling her wouldn’t help. You don’t get the medical history of donor sperm. All she can ever go off of is mom’s medical history. It’ll dig you a deeper hole but I would tell her that dads is adopted and has no family medical history to offer up

Some dude I went to school with was a huge pervert. He said really messed up stuff to my best friend. Had multiple reports against him from other girls. He also admitted to me, unprompted after i was forced to sit next to him on the bus, he had a foot fetish. My friend said she saw him on a bus for after school kids, pay a girl $20 to suck her toes 😭

Idk about the other stories but the second has been retold too many times last time it was a female nurse almost bumping into an old lady

This ones a bit less scary. But when I was around 14-15ish I was playing Roblox when all of the sudden I got this terrible feeling in my gut. It was telling me to look around the property outside but I shook it off and kept playing, then it hit me again twice as hard. A bit of context, we owned a male and female goat, along with 8 chickens and 3 dogs. One of those dogs was a black furred German Sheperd dominant mix. He was a hunter, and a good one too. (This is important.) My dad was asleep and my mom was trying to keep us as quiet as possible, but as soon as I started heading out my mom yelled quietly asking what I was doing? All I could tell her before rushing out the door was "I don't know, but something is horribly wrong." I started off by scouting the front yard, Nothing. No dogs getting out, no goats were out. Everything looked fine. I ran around to the back yard and was immediately met with the female goat in the dog yard. I swear I superman leapt all the way because I could sense the hunter was near and shoved her back into her interior. I looked off to the right, and the German Sheperd was quite literally inches from her. My mom to this day never questions my senses again.

These channel types went downhill horribly since the pandemic lmao.

3:05 I do this 2 I tried to stop but its hard 2 unless my mouth is dry and I need a drink or somthing and I even do it in a specific way (main dish ex chess burger side ex fries then drink

As somebody who who has broken multiple bones in my life ribs leg wrist I can tell you some of the worst pain I've ever been in was a sunburn so fuck those doctors for laughing at that good

40s not old my dude

3:33 bloody hell! I laughed so hard at this 😂

Saw The Dead South in a small old opera house style theatre where almost everyone was on balconies looking down. The band was awesome but the lighting was SO WRONG for the room. They did this effect regularly where these massive spotlights shone up behind them to make the band look like silhouettes, which would have been epic if we were all at ground level looking up but as it was we literally had to cover our eyes for half the show to not get blinded. Unfortunate experience and hopefully they got some feedback so they could fix this or maybe not play this kind of venue again.

Ozzy Osbourne could talk normally while the show was being filmed, that clever bast.rd can do it to this day. And I thought he cooked his brain fully with all the stuff he took.