As mentioned by Shaykh it still depends on the brother to decide. We have the same situation, my wife was a christian, she lost her parents at a young age, and had a relationship, and was being abused and ra*ed by several men. She converted to Islam, and I married her when she was 17. She is very shy, I didn't know her past relationship and her trauma until we got married; I was shocked. Instead of divorcing her I still accept and love her because I see her repentance, and she is a loving, sweet, caring and religious wife. If she sincerly repents and Allah forgives then who am I not to forgive her past.
May Allah bless your marriage but a revert who was not aware of the guidelines of Islam is not the same as a Muslim who committed zina whilst knowing the severity of the sin
U r right but U have to listen this video .U need it to listen again because still U HV confusion same like the person who asked question with Sheikh@@Anonymous-yh4ho
InshaAllah Allah continue to bless your marriage. It depends really on the man if he forgives her, he should never mention her past again. If he thinks he can't get over her past, he better think it through whether to continue this union or not.
This poor brother sounds innocent and all he wanted was someone innocent and clean like himself at the end of the day she lied to him and betrayed one of the most important things to a man especially getting married for the first time
What About Many who Avoid this Serious Sin Due to Allah's Fear And knowing that Allah and Various Prophet's has Warned it's Severe consequences & Punishments .. In Grave • Judgement Day .. Qayamah and Jahannam .. Those who Prefer Modesty Over Shamelessness .. Immorality & Indecency Are Innocents😶Wat the Hell😤 I Hate when People who Call ones who Save Themselves From This Utterly Immoral Act as Innocent and Clean 😠 That Means who does this Major Sin Are Transgressors..Impure & Dirty 😤 Everybody marries For the First time only not many can think of 2nd or 3rd marriage 😤
She didn't lie to him. As a matter of fact, she was honest with him. As sheik mentioned it was her right not to disclose her past to anyone including her husband. He very manipulatively coerced her into disclosing her past, now he has to live with the consequences weather he stay in this marriage or not. Secondly, why didn't he ask about virginity before getting married, if it was that important 🤔
First of all she told him without him asking her. Then the Sheikh mentions you have someone who has been married before or someone who is yet to be married. No virgin noir virginity, has been mentioned.
Don't look at it as betrayal, because she committed the sin against herself and it was to be reconciled with Allah. So this is a matter she has with Allah.
its not that she lied its that she cant expose her sin. And the one who repents is like one without sin. What is sinful here is that she exposed what Allah kept hidden and now her sin is not forgiven
@@luzdani11she literally lied and it's not permissible to lie, except in 3 cases. This does not fall under those cases. Stop justifying it The brother wanted a virgin wife and even stipulated it as a condition, she lied to him saying she's a virgin and now he is supposed to just bend backwards and accept such behaviour?! I accept that people repent from their sins, but there is a reason that zina is prohibited and people are told to stay away from it - because of situations like this. If this woman is to be divorced by her husband, what would happen to her? zina carries consequences not only in this life, but in the hereafter aswell. Let's stop acting like the brother is spineless and actually accept that he was basically deceived
The people who did adulterous actions loved this answer from the Sheikh as I read the comments. “Just forgive and move” while this young boy was patient all this time to marry a good woman, but got deceived. It’s a hard pill to swallow. It’s a personal matter and he should make that personal decision. He deserves better definitely. Especially since it was his condition for the marriage. It’s basically a breach of contract. Anyone would return a car that was sold as brand new, but secretly was rolled back thousands of km and had multiple previous owners.
Sheikh is speaking with knowledge, are you? If not then stop khalas! This life is a test,you can be tested by wealth,betrayal,being miserable etc etc.. If you want untouched hoors you prepare for jannah there you will find in shaa Allah.. In this life don't be ungrateful to Allah, submit to Allah as you believe in Allah and Islaam given to us. May Allah guide us, Ameen.
@@Answer_the_truth The good Sheikh gave his good advice about forgiveness and moving on as good moral, but he also said it’s a personal matter. Of course we should follow our religious teachings and forgive as much we can, but let’s not normalise the act of deceiving people and tolerate misbehaviour under the disguise of “Life is a test”. Because deceiving people is also against religious teachings. If you tolerate this, then someone could take advantage of you and say “yeah deal with it, because life is a test”. Allah does not say that you should be taken advantage of or else you’re ungrateful. So where do you get that we’re ungrateful towards Allah if we speak out against injustice? May Allah guide us all and also give you a piece of common sense…
@@KubiIay Ameen, may Allah give me a piece of common sense, Ameen. No problem. No one has to tell you what filth they did, if she is not married then she is not a divorcee and won't be counted as such, so that time she should not say she did that, why should she bring trouble to herself, it's between her and Allah.. When she repented that's it, she doesn't have to tell to human, yes if she has defect of not conceiving child, if she wears a wig etc, she should tell that and not deceive future husband. But, this thing,No! That's what i was saying, Sheikh is speaking with knowledge and you with emotions. Husband has right to do what he wants after knowing that, only advice is given, but I'm talking about revealing about their past affairs, which should not be done. If not then bring history of what all you did, and she did, if every human does that, no one would want to see each other's faces.. So it's better to make it concealed which Allah wants it to be concealed. And I'm also layman... So I'm also not important than what people of knowledge say.
@@Answer_the_truthi don’t mean to be rude, but following blindly someone because he is a sheikh is the biggest mistake a Muslim can make. You have to assess if he speaks the truth or not. In that case, yes he spoke right, you can’t disclose your sins, BUT you can’t lie to brother. She did, she betrayed him and started the marriage on a LIE. How can there be marriage if there is no trust ? So yes, in the end the choice is to the brother, if I was in his case, I would marry a second wife or divorce after a time because unfortunately I could not pass over it. It’s not even the fact that she was not a virgin, it’s fact that she lied to me, that she robbed me of that choice. May Allah bless you.
@@Blackbeard1222 May Allah bless you too, I am not talking about following blindly, Sheikh Assim is talking based on Islaam, we are talking based on emotions, he also said it is husband's choice.
This sheik is missing the point. If he wanted a virgin as wife, and if he told her explicitly that he would marry her on condition that she was a virgin, and the woman went ahead with the marriage, that is straight lying and deceit. The guy has every right to feel revolted.
Everyone is saying like they've seen it happening with their eyes,he mentioned this requirements,she said virgin before and after said not,bla bla bla.... don't you guys have some real business!
forgiving doesn't mean the past wont affect the future , a women who had multiple sexual relationships will have traumas , bonding issues , flashbacks with the other mens during intercourse , comparing and so much more deeper and hidden vices . Zina is haram because you're supposed to preserve not only your body but especially your heart and mental health . I repeat , Forgiving does not mean the past wont affect the future .
so if she repents she's not allowed to get married and have a life? what if men who committed the Sin can women say the same thing about him and also get a divorce?
Imagine staying out of that kind of life imagining to get a spouse similar and this happening. She should have said no to the marriage maybe give another excuse that was his condition. I hope If she repents they forget this and live a beautiful good life
@@SehrishAhmed-hq5bf at the beginning he says it was a requirement. So before marriage he communicated that he wanted a Muslima that prays and to be a virgen like him
You are the only second or third woman here to sympathize with the man and accepting that she did wrong. May Allah bless our life with good woman around us.
@@sufi7460 I am just trying to be fair regardless of gender. Nowadays, men take men’s side blindly, and females take females side blindly. This is not right.
A man has no right to ask if a woman is a virgin or not before marrying her, of course he can look around and do research with family members to know her character as to whether she hangs out with boys or goes clubbing etc but u can bluntly ask them If they are virgin as it’s their privacy and it’s between her and Allah and she will have answer Allah for her actions
@@kitty5872 if a woman is bluntly admitting she is a virgin, and then husband finds out that's a lie (because falsehood always perishes) then the man has every right to be mad here. She the mistake of deception.
As a girl my self..i cant imagine n think to keep such spouse in my life.. may allah protect us from such people ...forgiveness is good but not everyone got strength to forgive n forget the fact that his or her spouse is a second hand person 😢... am dying to imagine it wallah..ya akhi may allah heal ur heart n emotions and do it what is best for you in ur life
Sis I finally find 1 woman (you) who can understand it to some level. The agony that you are feeling, multiply it with 1000 and that's how much we men feel when we are betrayed in this way. May Allah protect us all from such people.
What happens when your husband marries another women? Men and women arent the same in reality. Your line of thinking is bizarre for a woman. No hate just an observation. It is biologicaly proven for men so kind of an odd statement from a woman as biologically women place a great deal of emphasis on other things (looks, money, stability, height, competence, status eventhough they dont admit they do but we all know it)
You are the only second or third woman here to sympathize with the man and accepting that she did wrong. May Allah bless our life with good woman around us.
comments as usual defending the woman, this is 100% wrong, if someone makes 1 of his conditions that the spouse has to be a virgin, and she lies and pretends she is. That s 100% wrong, that is lying and deciet. If she did fulfill the criteria, why did she pretend she did? Why do people always give women a green pass oin things that are blatantly and clearly wrong. I cant believe people are justifying lying and deception
The society is a feminist simp!! It's okay if she did it.. Forgive her cause Allah is merciful. She lied because she was afraid of society. Where was her fear when she was committing zina?? The amount of people justifying zina is so awful. These same people will come attacking a man if he talks about a second marriage! We live in a society where we are told to forgive a zania but it's a taboo to marry twice, even if she is a widow!!
@@javedhashmi3315you‘re so right , but this Verse keeps me steadfast as a man 2:228 where god says that men are preferred a bit over women; I think because of the very fact you mentioned
@coolerthetyrant7923 wallah many ppl inthe comments acting like zina is just casual and the virgin husband is wrong for finding out she used to gangbang. Astakfirullah, imagine me telling her that im a multi-millonare and after marrage i reveal that im dead broke and in debt. How would she feel? You might say this is not the same. No akhi this is same. If i say im vroke and in debt will she marry me? Will society look at me the same way?
@@samir_chogood point, at least you can possibly become rich in the future. But you can't undo Zinah. So lying about wealth is actually a lesser evil. This sheikh is really giving bad advice 😢
Make a checklist, want multiple kids, want a meher under certain amount, want only 1 vacation a year, no past relations idk anything you feel is important. Tell her to look at it and then say if she fits the requitments or not. She doesnt have to answer which requirement she doesnt fit so it saves her from admitting publicslly to any sins and saves the guy from a partner that doesnt fit any requirements. Eg she had past relations, says she doesnt fit but guy will have no idea exactly which one she doesnt fit, could be her wanting multiple kids etc, and he looks for someone who will fit the requirements.
@@maazmustafa2322 I don't know about the revert unfortunately, I've just seen this topic discussed many times and tried thinking of an easy solution. I've tried commenting this on tiktok comment sections sometimes and the like but it's not a very popular method people use. Though now I might check out his channel to see what else he has to say,
@@ilk_tek2894 you can encourage her to also make her own checklist, its always better to make sure you're both compatible without spending too much time investing in eachother only to break it off with a broken heart down the road. personally I consider it a great way to show that your serious about your intentions.
Yes believing women for believing man. Quran 33:35 Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allāh often and the women who do so - for them Allāh has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.
It’s regarding people who are actively in that lifestyle. If he/she changed their lifestyle, they don’t fall into this negative groups. And Allah knows best.
So does an a non muslim who has accepted islam still considered a kafir. We call such a person muslim not a non believer but our brother or sister in islam. Same thing can be applied to adulterer if he/she has repented they are pure
Being a virgin, he's very inexperienced in these matters so he'd never have known. I feel for him. He should divorce her if he can come to terms with giving up his mahr
I am a christian . Psychologists say that humans don't change and repeat mistakes. That is why addicts and alcoholics and gamblers usually repeat past mistakes despite knowing the consequences of their actions. Unfortunately someone who has had multiple partners in the past is more likely to cheat in the future. Ask your partner about their past and you will see your future. She lied to him before and the only reason she told him the truth is because she realised he would find out eventually . She probably assumes he is a weak character and won't leave her . If he were my son I would tell him to run and save him multiple problems ahead .
I am a psychologist. And I am very happy to tell you that your understanding that we say that humans don't change is profoundly mistaken! Humans can change profoundly. And, unless I am very mistaken, I think most Christians, such as St Paul, for example, would agree.
@notmyfirstlanguage Obviously people can change but if you look at the statistics. Unfortunately relapse rates for individuals who enter recovery from a drug or alcohol addiction are quite high. Studies reflect that about 40-60% of individuals relapse within 30 days of leaving an inpatient drug and alcohol treatment center, and up to 85% relapse within the first year.
He didn’t answer the question. No one is saying he needs to forgive her. Now if she said she is a virgin and ends up that she isn’t one, then she lied. Usually a liar is a liar so run
He gave his answer actually. He said “if she has already repented and now became a good muslim, then she should not tell anyone about her old sins.” And yes, he added about forgiveness too, so husband can make his choice. She lied, but we don’t know both of them, her situation etc. , that’s why it would be wrong to tell him to run from her.
@@kar1a7 No, she deceived the man to get the marriage. If I deceive you in a business contractm, so that I take a bigger cut than you, would you still just forgive me for deceiving you and continue the contract?
@@kar1a7 That means we can have sex before marriage as much as we want? We just need to repent? Is this really Islam ? It would be different if she wasn't a Muslim before, But if she was a Muslim and had se then, is that really the case? That means as a man we can also do it!! Do you see how absurd it becomes? We don't know whether Allah has forgave her or not it comes from Allah. It doesn't mean that Sheikh should start attacking the questioner by telling him you are not a man if you will not forgive her and then telling it depends on him. It is the process of making a cuck. And it's wrong
If she becomes pure, pious and repent of her previous sins... That's the whole point sheikh. These women who kept whoring around tend to remain pure for a few years then get engaged in fornications and scandals in future. And you didn't mention the fact these women have violated their husbands right. They basically scammed their husbands. If they think they have become pure, then they better go to jannah alone. It's not obligatory for men to stay with one wife they can marry another one if they want at the same time.
Often times it's a sinner who makes the most noise. For every time you sin, Allah provided an avenue for you to repent and seek Allah's mercy and forgiveness. And if it happens again, you again repent and regret your actions. If it happens a thousand times, you repent a thousand. There is No one time Allah will Not forgive you becoz you repeated the same mistake. Our Lord is God of forgiveness and mercy. As Prophet Ibraheem said: He said, “None despairs of his Lord's mercy except those who have strayed.” Quran 15:56
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who: - Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.) - Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship. - Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past. - When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past. - It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not. Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
I like sheiks answer but I think the guy feels betrayed and lied to. The guy was very clear in wanting a virgin b/c he’s virgin himself and his wife lied to him. She tricked him. She could’ve just ghosted him or broke things off before it escalated to marriage… I was in similar situation when a guy lied about his past just to appease me. If he was gonna lie, might as well keep up with it but instead he revealed the truth at the end. Obviously I reacted angrily but I just needed time to cool off. Instead HE wanted to break up. So I say they just need time away from each other. Don’t involve other women but just use that time to realize how important the person is to you NOW and the marriage. The wife also needs to apologize and try redeem herself. She gotta show how much she loves him. If after some time he doesn’t think he can move past it or forgive her then yea divorce….:
@@AliSidTex yea he can take another virgin wife if his country allows it if virginity is so important to him even though now he won’t be one. You know our Prophet’s only virgin wife was Aisha….
@@user-zm3no5xb6t but if his country or society doesn't allow him to marry others, then he should avoid getting married to a woman who is not going to give him everything he needs like virginity. Otherwise he will start to resent and hate her like a chain on his ankle.
@@AliSidTex yeah like that's the greatest solution on the planet😅😂. You said "solve things very quickly" ; how so and can you give me an example pwease!?
Allah is more much much more forgiving than us humans, don't compare it. Most men care about the past, it affects the intimacy in marriage, it is not something automatically fixed because she is forgiven for it. If a virgin man wants a virgin woman, there is nothing wrong with seeking it, if she lies about it then this is sin from her.
But divorce is not easy for a man in the west. Might be same for him since he's from a European country. In US, even if a marriage lasted for 1 night, the court can put lot's of pressure on the man to divide his assets and income.
@jesterequinox he shouldn't have married the woman without a thorough background check and making sure she was upon the Deen and to be honest personally why did he marry a Muslim in Norway??? He could try marrying a Christian Norwegian girl and perhaps given her dawah and if she wasn't a vigin it would be understandable
I can understand where the Sheikh is coming from. However, if I were in the brother's shoes I would start considering divorce. Studies have shown that women who have had multiple sexual partners have a greatly reduced ability to pair bond and are more likely to divorce. They are also more likely to cheat in the marriage. If this were an Islamic society governed by Sharia law then I would be inclined to agree with the Shiekh's attitude. However, the fact is in the West, men, especially muslim men, are operating from a deficit, and thus, can not afford to be so forgiving for a woman's past. Furthermore, people need to be disincentivised to be promiscious before marriage, and one way to do this is to subject them to some measure of consequence in society.
And you think Promiscuous men are satisfied in a marriage with one wife?. He will continue to cheat and seek variety bc that's what he's so used to. That's what the data shows for men too. It also shows that men who have had multiple partners have low satisfaction rates in marriage.
@@alaminislam7204but he told him in the end that it was his call. Which means its not sinful to divorce, since the sheik would not tell him he has a choice if the choice is sinful.
If you want to have a virgin wife physically and emotionally, pick her from conservative Patriarchal family, most of them are in conservative societies in islamic countries, also you should ask the father if she's a virgin or divorced, and you should write in the marriage contract that she is a virgin too, if someone refuse your demands, don't look back and move on to the next family, having a conservative housewife is a bless.
But more often then not the families from these 3rd world counties are looking for a way out and marry the guy from the west only for citizenship and then leave
@@sufi7460 This is just common sense, even traditional non-Muslim societies know this. Today we are forced to explain such simple things because of the massive westernization of human society...
This is one of the reasons we should recite the dua mentioned in Sura Al Furqan ayat 74: "Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us a leader for the righteous." May Allah calm the heart of this man and bless the couple in this life and the afterlife
@@inayah6990what if the guy was in gay relationships before his marriage and concealed it . Would that be okay if he repents 😕. Would you marry a man who kept that from you?🤔
In Islam, one is Not suppose to disclose his or her past sins to anyone. And disclosing it does not solve anything but rather it creates mistrust and negativity. No dwelling in the past. As for the health part, it's recommended for both of them.
I dont like the answers this sheikh gives sometimes. Its very one sided sometimes. Its straight up if she lied to you about being a virgin before marriage, divorce her and find a equal spouse.
Brother basically he gave a religiously accurate answer. If she has disclosed things herself, it might be that she is being honest ans regrets. However, everyone in the comment basically get in the shoes of the questioner and then giving answers as if it happened to them, that's why many answers are emotional 😆
@@bronzebueno this is the dumbest shit i heard in a long time. respectfully you are nobody, you have no qualifications on islam nor are you learned. This is a response a munafiq would say
@@Maxwell_V she Iied and deceived by making him believe she was a virgin when he put that in the marriage contract. She should’ve not mentioned it to hide her sins not deceive . You’d have a point if the husband didn’t put it in the marriage contract
so true brother i can literally see some so called muslim women pulling this and saying ''the shayk said as long as i repent everything is ok'' and then they continue the haram activities i don't understand how ppl don't get simple things right the woman in question can be anyone not particularly a pious woman [ im not talking abt this case, im talking abt ANY case] i have seen so many young girls get into haram relationship either cuz they want male attention or all of their friends have relationships so the feeling to be included makes them to choose haram and believe me none of this girls ever think of what Allah has commanded and they don't repent at all for their haram relationships ???? ...... how do i know that they don't repent? bcuz they dont even pray salah or recite quran i'm ashamed to say this but they don't even know what is haram and what is halal i have to teach them that any intentional physical contact with opposite gender is haram and this girls started calling me backward like fr
@@AlpLimIndFoxso u do agree that we should all commit zina and then just repent b4 marriage? I mean that's what you're basically saying. Times change but islam doesn't.
Terminate the marriage as you will never be able to trust her! It will always be at the back of your mind and especially when you are intimate. She will alwsys compare you to othet partnets and never be satisfied. You should have done your research befire agreeing to marriage!
That's correct a woman like that can never be trusted and was only looking for a good man so he can ben her way. The chances of her being disloyal are very high especially if he accepts it.
@captainjackuniversal And now assuming again.. I don't need to open anything to see that's she's presenting herself... Like I said before fear Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala...You'll have a lot of problems if you're acting like this
That woman is a snake. And I say this as a woman. She felt comfortable now that he’s stuck and married to her to tell him. But before she lied and said she was pure just so he could keep being interested in her. He loved a different version of her in his head. That woman doesn’t exist after this betrayal. She lied. And she’ll lie again. Find yourself another woman, brother. One that isn’t ashamed to be herself with you. And one that doesn’t deceive you when it matters, only to shatter your heart and trust just because she felt guilty and wanted to take that weight off her shoulders. Skip.
Sis she somewhere must've felt guilty for keeping it from him, we don't know the complete scenario then how can we make assumptions and call her a snake? It's a request, please don't assume things on your own.
Ah that's true I can just say to everyone doesn't matter if man or woman it can be really riskful if the partner had a different life before because some of them can not really close the past and it will bring high potentially problems and in the relationship of two person it's really hard if the one was waiting for a virgin like hisself but ofc it's different if someone is a revert and made a lot of tauba. May Allah help us all in every aspects of life 🤲
@@afifahossain5717 I see, but I’m judging based on her actions that he provided. Sure, calling her a snake is a bit much, but what she did wasn’t something small. She broke this man to pieces with that information. Information had he known before marriage, probably wouldn’t have made him marry her. This man stayed pure until his marriage and wanted a woman who wanted the same. There’s nothing wrong with having standards (especially since he applied those very same standards to himself). It’s not fair for her to deceive him and then shatter his heart just because keeping that secret was eating her alive from guilt. It’s also not fair to expect him to feel okay with any of this. He deserves better.
Becarefull calling her names. Everbdy juste assume she lied but we dont know for sure. What if the husband is the one that assumed that she was a virgin?
There is nothing wrong in divorcing his wife its not Haram at all Shaykh is stretching it for no reason Shaikh is like if you asked for forgiveness to Allah its all okay but only between the individual and Allah azza wajal. Just imagine if a person smokes for years even though he knows its haram and then after years of smoking he repented and decided to never smoke ever again doesn't mean his lungs will go back to infancy level health it will have consequences. But for this I would say this to the guy he should reconsider the decision because his wife herself told him all of this, this shows what kind of a person she is now. But still if he doesn't want to have a wife who has been touched by other men then divorce her there is also nothing wrong it cause if he doesn't divorce her this will eat him inside so its better to divorce her.
Sheikh has much more wisdom than you, that's why he is stretching and not just saying "just divorce." Divorce is a huge thing and should be the very last step if anything else doesn't work. Also him knowing now she was not a virgin is just a "problem in his head". Because before it seems it was no problem he was happy with her. It's just the information that seemed to have changed his opinion about her. That shows you can deal with it if you want to and forget about it and continue as you did before.
I think the Sheikh's point is that Zina is a sin on Allah; so if Allah can forgive it, who are we to still hold it against them. It is not like it was committed against him, since they were not together then.
@@tahirballikaya213 there was no problem because it's a very new marriage till now. And Shaykh was stretching it without any reason he seemed more interested in knowing how the guy find it that his wife isn't virgin when in the beginning he said he didn't asked her but Shaykh Assim already had his gun's barrel pointed at him. I don't need to be knowledgeable like shaykh to understand it. And shaykh does this a lot of the times. Nobody should suffer in a marriage that is it.
Never liked this Sheikh, he has no empathy, just straight up blatantly spits out whatever he says. Didn’t even end up addressing exactly what the brother asked
genuinely tho like what else do you expect him to say. brother he can’t just come out and be like ya ya not totally divorce her. he can’t advice people to divorce others when he’s a public figure because people will point fingers at him and blame him for breaking homes. ofc he’s gonna look at the positive side and encourage him to forgive and forget.
He is a celebrity youtube sheikh. What else do you expect from this man. The real ulama like Sheikh Fawzan, and others are unknown to the common public
This isn’t just about repentance the woman is DISGUSTING! As a muslimah myself I am disturbed by this. Alhamdulillah we can repent but something like this is intentional and done from ill-intentions and isn’t easy to dismiss, I hope the brother recovers from this trauma and finds someone better
Its not about who would marry who but who this person wanted to marry. Of he was honest with him being virgin and set it as a condition for the opposite side than he has a right to have what he wants and the woman is a major sinner because she lied, deceit and their whole marriage is based of off a lie
@@htsjunkbucket1364virginity in Islam means someone who didn’t marry before. Zina is not considered taking virginity so she did not lie nor is it appropriate to ask such a question to begin with. You cannot ask Muslims if they committed zina in the past
im 28 now. As a man who never even kissed a single girl im afraid to getting married. because what happens around me makes me worry that will i get a pure girl!
@@mohdfaizansiddiqui1171Same here, most of the Muslim men take Islam seriously and stay Halal, but but end up getting haram wives. While most of the Muslim women do not care about Islam except to wear hijabs due to family pressure, and enjoys this worldly life with these acts and when her family pressures her to get married or she herself thinks about to get married then she'll find any innocent Muslim man to trap him and get married.
[𝐑𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐛 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫] Prophet ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- said: "Allah will build a house in Heaven for whoever is diligent in observing 12 Sunnah Rak'at (as follows): 4 Rak'at before and 2 after the Zhuhr (Midday) Prayer, 2 after the Maghrib (Sunset Prayer), 2 after the ‘Isha (Evening) Prayer and 2 before the Fajr (Dawn) Prayer." (Hadith sahih narrated by at-Tirmidhi No. 379 and by others. Hadith No. 6183 in Sahih al-Jami’.)
I'm sorry to point out that it's simply arrogant of your need for attention by quoting hadith, as well meaning as the hadith is by itself, that has nothing to do with the subject matter being discussed and seems immature and selfish. I don't know you so please do not take this personally. I wish you the best but please try to give importance to what is being discussed. What does praying daily 12 sunnah rakahs have to do with divorce in Islam? Is this the appropriate place for that info or did you just want attention?
@@naimanwar8113 I got angry too but then I realized poor guy/girl is just trying to remind us that it's more important to pray then to get attached to worldly things. Besides, what has world given us anything other than anxiety and stress. Only peace is found with God.
@@zainsdifferent5014 I can say the same for you for being judgmental and misinterpreting my comments as other than helping where you are obviously an enabler. Perhaps you are seeking attention as well. Look to your own.
If she had really lied she would have been saved from this shit that's happening now,she chose to disclose the truth without any force,use some brains before advising such drastic things
She presented herself as someone pure. That is deceitful. I’m sure you wouldn’t be asking this question if the person married to her was your son or brother.
The Sheikh's advice works in a society where polygamy is accepted. If you marry a woman with a past, it's not the end of the world as you can still potentially marry a virgin in the future. But in a monogamous society, your wife becomes a liability not an asset. Resentment can grow against her in your heart, especially if she knew what you wanted and tricked you into marrying her. You will feel you became her slave because you have to provide for her and she is stopping you from achieving the kind of woman you actually want.
The problem is that he was lied to. Even for society that accepts polygyny his advice is not acceptable, it's wrong to deceive someone like this. You don't have to confess sins, but you can understand that someone wants a virgin and stay away if you're not one.
@@AliSidTex there is no such thing as secret polygyny, because by default every Muslim man is allowed to have multiple wives. That is his right as given be Allah swt and no one can take that away. He doesn't need the permission of any wife to take another. So there is no claim of deceit. And marriage, even so called secret polygny is not the same as cheating or Zinah. So to say "it seems" Is wrong and sinful, because you are going against What Allah swt decreed. Allah swt is not unjust. A wife can only put in her marriage contract, that she wants the right to divorce if he takes a second wife. She can't prohibit him from ever taking a second wife. Women need to stop making marriage difficult. Polygyny is natural for men.
So if we(men) forgive and accept the wrongdoings of the past of the female, Won't this be normalized for the other women?They'll think everything will be fine, let's party hard till marriage.
It's not other women's promiscuity that normalizes promiscuity in women. It's men's promiscuity. It's seeing that society doesn't really care about chastity since only women's chastity is focused on and men's lack of is accepted. This is what women do not buy into. It's the same trend with women from all races and religions. Remember, the weak follow the strong If chastity really matters, start with the leaders/shepherds of society; your sons and men
@@mymuslimthoughts6903 The sad reality is, most women don't care if a guy has bad past as long as the guy has a promising future. But that thought process is wrong. As a Muslim women, you should preserve yourself until marriage and you should also find a god fearing man who saved himself until marriage as well.
Its really easy. No shaykh needed. No scholar needed. No bin baz or uthaymeen needed. A man knows what to do. As for the weak amongst us , wallahi it is your weakness that causes you the most pain.
Man, you can just feel the hurt in the voice of this brother..... I just lost massive amounts of respect for the Sheikh for the way he's arrogantly speaking to him as if it's his fault. Like, what is wrong with you? Did Rasulullah(SAW) tell you to behave this way because you are an old "scholar" now? You will never ever understand the pain until it happens to you. Be humble.
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who: - Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.) - Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship. - Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past. - When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past. - It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not. Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
True. Amazing arrogance from Sheikh for such an important question. Attacking the person who is asking a question is a sign of weak knowledge and arrogance
Brother sheikh was only trying to show him multiple prospectives to make him take a decision with clarity but one thing sheikh said that i was personally interested in was that Allah is the most merciful and he forgives so we should too but taking the weakness of humans which Quran says explicitlyو خلقل انسان ضعيف we have created the human being weak we dont have infinite resources or the capacity to look over the grave sin that our partner has committed against themselves and they lied about it and after being exposed it’s something no one wants
It seems like the people in this comment section are the most purest and sinless of people on this planet. the brother asked the sheikh and the sheikh give his advice he did not make a decision for the brother. the brother is free to make his own decision. fear Allah your Rabb brothers and sisters, if you want to suggest to the brother to divorce her ok do it, but you do not have the right to defame a muslimah that you do not even know. I am especially astonished by some of the sisters here aren't we scared for ourselves, don't we have the same nafs and shaytan that made her fall into it which can make us fall into it as well. may Allah protect us. every son of Adam is a sinner and just look into your own heart for a moment just because your sins were covered by Allah because you repented and its been a while so you just forgot about it doesn't mean that someone else who did other sins and repented that now you look down upon them. seek refuge in Allah from being in such a state and ask Allah to forgive the sister and guide her and give the brother sabr and and heal his heart and replace his calamity and loss with something better ameen ya Rabb NOTE. NOT TALKING ABOUT EVERY COMMENT
Sub'han Allah wa bi'hamdihee. Jazakumullaahu khayraan for saying the truth. Alhamdulillah finally someone pointed this out. Majority people have seem to forgotten this verse: So do not claim yourselves to be pure; He is most knowing of who fears Him (53:32). It was extremely painful to see lack of manners, knowledge, empathy and humility in the comments section. We all are sinners, yet some of our Brothers, for whom Allah has made it easier to remain chaste, have become so proud and arrogant that instead of following Islam, they have started to follow Iblees. They are so after breaking this marriage and demeaning the caller's wife without considering any other perspective. I mention again: Virginity is not the key to a happy and successful marriage, but honesty is. I do sympathize with the caller's situation here, and am not supporting his wife or promoting promiscuity, but we need to prioritize Deen above everything else in our spouse. His wife could have easily hidden this fact from him during the conversation and he would have been fooled all his life, but she chose to be honest with him. Most importantly, it is his call whether he wants to stay in this marriage or not because none of us have lived with his wife under the same roof but he has, so only he knows about his wife's all other perspectives way better than all of us. We only pray to Allah that He guides the caller's heart and mind to take the right decision considering all perspectives possible. Brothers in Islam, please strive to gain better knowledge and reflect upon Quran and Sunnah deeply. We are in the End of times when ignorance will prevail and you all sadly are attesting to it. The Judgement Day is near more than ever, so Fear Allah. May Allah SWT forgive and guide us all.
@@AAA-jq1tf Alhamdulillah I do. But do you know the punishment for slandering? No worries, I'll share it here: Narrated by Abu Huraira RA: Prophet Muhammad SAW asked, "Do you know who is the bankrupt?" The companions said: "The bankrupt among us is one who has neither money with him nor any property". He (SAW) said, "The real bankrupt of my Ummah would be he who would come on the Day of Resurrection with Salat, Saum and Sadaqah (charity), (but he will find himself bankrupt on that day as he will have exhausted the good deeds) because he reviled others, brought calumny against others, unlawfully devoured the wealth of others, shed the blood of others and beat others; so his good deeds would be credited to the account of those (who suffered at his hand). If his good deeds fall short to clear the account, their sins would be entered in his account and he would be thrown in the (Hell) Fire". (Sahih Muslim 2581)
it is not about forgiving or accepting, just thinking about someone who you previously thought was pure and good and now you know she already slept with multiple men is disgusting. even if you forgive. you can never get away from the disgust and can never see her the same way as you have seen in the part. it will be a slow and painful marriage towards divorce. You can never feel of see her in the same light as before.
It sounds to me like Sheikh is saying that it permissible to lie about your virginity status to the one seeking your hand in marriage, if you have repented from it. While upholding the scholarly consensus to not disclose a sin Allah has kept hidden, you deceive your spouse to be whose major reason for marrying you is his/her conviction of your chastity. May Allah guide us to the truth!
Yeh very contradictory, if it was known that he was expecting a virgin the fact she lied on such a level is enough or a divorce ASAP. No one has to say they committed zina, they just have to say I don't meet your criteria so this won't go further. But when someone lies and their lie gets exposed, they got themselves to blame.
These are fruits of absence of Islamic Theocracy. No Shari'ah, no order. No Shari'ah, no consequence for the sin. In a khilafah, its almost impossible for zina to take place, and if done the punishment is done in public. The entire neighborhood knows and can help out the potential to know of their past. As this saves the doomed consequences of such marriages. I feel sympathetic to the brother, may Allah make it easy for him and grant him a pure spouse, Ameen.
I'm very disappointed from his answer Brother was betrayed badly The only option is that he should divorce her because it is clear that he don't want her anymore so there is no point of staying together May Allah forgive her and brother should go for second marriage
This random Sheikh is Not any scholar...just a random guy opened YT channel... don't know why people listen to him?? Any Muslim can get knowledge from Quran and Authentic Hadiths. Only thing is he needs to give time for that and understand all details carefully.
So if a man had a history of brutal domestic violence on two ex wives and served time in prison, but repented and wanted to get married again the new wife shouldn’t know about that, please give me a break
That’s not a sin, that’s a brutality, aggressive men and women have a psychological issue that needs to be solved, and they can literally destroy your life if untreated, this example is not comparable, a banana and an apple are fruits, but they are not the same 😅
Shiekh described the type of woman thats forgiven by Allah. Then shiekh applies it to the callers situation and ends it with "its your call akhi". He did his job perfectly here.
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who: - Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.) - Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship. - Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past. - When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past. Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
if you're planning to sin with the intent of asking for forgiveness in the future then that won't work it only works if you are sincerely repenting and are ACTUALLY sorry
@@gtxg.Every zina by a born Muslim is done with full understanding that it's a sin, and with a feeling that they'll repent later. Read that again. Now if someone really hated what they've done and stopped after a few slips Allah may forgive but the man still has the right to not marry zani women as per surah an Noor.
Salam Alaykum brothers and sisters. After reading so many comments, i have to come out and say something. Do not suggest divorce to anyone as it is makruh and so therefore your opinion on his issue is pointless. Just as the Sheikh has said, the decision going forward would be up to the husband and the sheikh put the husband in the perspectives of repenting muslims and what Islam has to say and how Allah has made Islam a true religion of peace. As muslims, we should keep seeking for knowledge and not suggesting what's not to be uttered. May Almighty Allah guide us...
Walaikum salam,i don't know why people suggest divorce,maybe the lady has repent and if Allah subhana WattalaAllah forgive her sin why cant we?This would be much worse if she did zina when they was married.But this happened in the past and i dont think its a reason for divorce.
@@xeno6578 So if she finds out her husband r****ed women in the past but repented, then who is she to not forgive his sins? Shirk is worse than this and Allah forgives shirk if one sincerely repents, right?
@@yasmas8194Allah swt forgives sins that are between Allah and the person repenting. Allah swt does not forgive wrong that has been done to someone else unless that person forgives too. So r*pe and consensual relationship are two different things and I doubt anyone would ever forgive their r*pist
Makruh? Sure,but I did it for the best of the brother. He is a good man. A woman to have shady past and easily enter marriage, why does he need to gamble on his life? Please know that promiscuous women are very dangerous. I have watched podcast where the mother not only neglect her children financially and not even cook for them, she badmouthed and accused the father and even want to invite her eldest daughter to have fornication along with her with some random man. And she brought in some random men into her house multiple times. What is the chance that some of the kids won't be tricked by some perverts aka her partners? Oh I know the answer, only God protect them if it didn't happen even once. Most cases they should have been done for. I once believed people can change, but now I rather believe people can't change because the gamble is too much to lose for everyone related except the woman.
The problem is she lied and how can he trust her . I understand the imam trying the best not end , but if the guy wanted that from beginning and he has stated that he wants virgin he has right to divorce her .I know one story that the girl lied and the guy divorced her , her cousin told her why u lying tell the truth be free and strong if he wants ok if not move one someone else would marry you as you are and there is no problem with it , but at the end of the day she has been honest and not being afraid about this matter
If he divorced his wife,,,,then he can take mahar,and gifts back,,,its written Quran (4:19) U can't take back that u had given to your which until and unless u get know that wife is doing immoralities,,,,
@@muzzammilkamran5948 akh the women these days are so rebellious, you probably aint gonna get your mahr back. Theres a reason why women are the majority of the people of hellfire
brothers just remember, pre marital relationships increase chances of divorce so be careful before you decide to be so forgiving to such a woman who had boyfriends prior.
I know a sister who had a crazy past, married a righteous brother, now has kids with him, she homeschools, wears niqab, the most traditional, humble wife out there, her family love her and it's only bc she's been concealed by Allah. This is not the only example, there are many like this. Many righteous married women are walking around today like this. I never understood the importance of concealing sins until I realised that most men would never marry a woman with a past and so concealing these sins, after repenting, when a good righteous brother comes makes a lot of sense. There's so much wisdom in covering up sins bc Allah is the Most Merciful and we as the creation fall way short in that department. So it's a mercy from Allah that we conceal it from the people. I'm not saying it's right or wrong bc there seems to be a lot of opinions regarding this issue depending on what scholars you listen to or not. So I'm not saying what is halal and haraam bc I'm not quality do that. But I'm just pointing out the reality that repentance/istighfar is so powerful, that blessings upon blessing fall onto you after it. I've seen what happens to Muslims after they become religious and turn their lives around, the blessings in their lives multiply.
@@FreeToThink0 well that your experience i have seen multiple divorces in.First how you know the sister had a past she told you that.please reply me and his husband not that is wife had a past or not?
@@MuhammadFaisal-np7tc I went to all all girl school, these girls I've studied with grew up with, some are my friends and neighbors. Some were wild wild girls. None of their husbands know anything to this day. When you repent and change your life, blessings come pouring into your life. Allah conceals whom He wills.
@@FreeToThink0 It is a great injustice to a man that he does not know that my wife is like this.Your friend told you such things.Don't you think that they are being cruel to their husbands
With all due respect I cannot agree with the sheikh on this matter. If the brother is a virgin and his requirement for the sister he intends to marry is that she is a virgin there is NOTHING wrong with her being truthful in that matter because anything that begins in a lie will end in a lie and Allah azawajal knows best. So sisters and vice versa who believe that it is okay to lie to marry a brother/sister you like auzubillah it's is not do not start with fitnah.
@@olegnurmagomedov750 It being one of his requirements doesn't mean he asked obviously. The sheikh would likely would have a response more in favor of divorcing her if he stated that she lied about it cuz lying about premarital questions is a big no no.
This wahabi ain't scholar. This guy is Christianizing islam by talking too much about repentance. Boys and girls can do whatever they want before marriage and then just ask for forgiveness from god. HALLELUJAH.
I can't stand the fact that if my future wife had intercoursed before marriage,, wallahi i will resent her.. I can't cope with it,,divorce is the way.. I have big gheerah and can't accept that..
This shaykh is openly promoting to Sexual Relation before marriage.I would respectfully tell him to earn some more knowledge from Hadith and Quran.I am a Muslim, Alhamdulillah. But shaykh Abdul Malik told that if a girl who had sex before marriage, she is not permissible to marry a virgin Boy.If he finds out that she is not virgin,then he can give her divorce and demand the Mahr. Thanks to all
The sheikh said in islam a virgin is someone who wasn’t previously married not whether they had had sexual relationships. In that context would a prostitute who was never married be considered a virgin according to this sheikh
😂😂😂 So as per this Sheikh marrying a divorced woman who gave her virginity in a halal way is a problem, but marrying a prostitute who slept with a lot of men but still unmarried is not a problem and still she is a virgin 😂😂😂. He is jaahil
Even so, the wisdom of the Sheikh’s answer is better even if it’s not generally accepted. This life isn’t about having everything you want to live a ‘happy’ life. It’s about finding a partner that will make your life easier so that you can both live righteously until the end of our test in this world.
While the answer he gave make sense generally, ultimately she lies and deceived him, no matter how much she becomes a holy and pious person, the mirages started with a lie and a big one at that, in my opinion marriages like this won’t last, it will keep coming back to the same point!
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who: - Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.) - Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship. - Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past. - When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past. - It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not. Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
Are you nuts?! It's easy for the shiekh to say because he isn't in his shoe but imagine marrying a woman thinking she was pure like you only to find out she was ran through and after having fun settled for the poor guy
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who: - Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.) - Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship. - Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past. - When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past. - It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not. Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
@@zainsdifferent5014It’s not a defense, it’s the truth. There are many tactics people use to hide their pasts. I’ve seen both men and women do so successfully.
People would rather be simps then to follow the wisdom of Allah that A VIRGIN SHOULD ONLY MARRY A VIRGIN- A NON VIRGIN IN TERMS OF MARRIAGE IS ON THE LEVEL OF A MUSHRIK - Those that Allah has protected the chastity of should marry only themselves. And on top of this this is in an age where it is mainly women who are choosing to be nonvirgins, at this point they have lost the right to marry a righteous man.
This young guy asks if it's "sinful" to leave her when he's the one who was deceived. All These young guys have been so used to having their rights trampled on as men, this generation is so weak...
You will never find happiness with her before you have children leave her inshalah look for pious woman that tells me she does not care even to learn basics of life islam how can she be a good mother for your children?
Definitely divorce that women, who on earth want to pass his marriage life with FAKE happiness inside his/her heart? When you're not mentally happy, don't try to force yourself to get fit inside. That girl had multiple partners before marriage means, it has pretty high chance that her previous boyfriends dumped her. Due to not finding any other option she ended up getting married. Girls/Boys who already had multiple partners before is not suitable for marriage life, it's bitter truth.
@@omglol9571 Not works for most of us, we human are emotional creatures. When you're clean yourself, it's almost impossible to actually balance the entire marriage life with someone who's totally opposite of you. That brother already explained that what he's and about her wife. Judging his situation it's definitely a big NO. Hoping Allah will give him better life partner in this duniya or in jannah.
If she had sex shes not a Virgin. Not based on marriage. Lets not try to cover it up. If a woman Lies about her past sexual encounters she Will not become a wise mother.
I understand both perspectives, the sheikhs advice and the married guy. It was the young man's condition to marry a virgin. That's a big test for the man May Allah help him amin. I would listen to the sheikh and look if the girl is loving the deen and practising correctly. If so, stay with her and Allah is the best rewarder for your tolerance and sabr.
sheik only giving this answer bcze he know that the correct thing to do is divorce ; but hes in tv so he need give a last chance to the couple ; divorce shouldnt be fast . In pvt consultation he would say to him divorce her without wasting time
@@shadowscape00 clearly u dont know anything about communication ; public communication and private communication are not the same lmao . Go to school and stop talking if u dont understand a comment .
@@shadowscape00 unfortunately he's right. Most of these online famous "sheikhs" and/or "scholars" are PR trained, so they answer like politicians. All twisted and nothing straightforward when it comes to sensitive matters like these, which makes it Even worse. At most, the explanations and options should've taken maximum 1 minute. All this extra reverse interrogation and pandering is unnecessary and actually more harmful than good. Answers like these reach young Muslim teens, and it teaches them to bend over and not stand firm in belief and punishment for anything.
I am a virgin and that too by choice and with tremendous self-control, also with the sole purpose of saving myself for the one who I marry. I will die alone but will never be ok with marrying a non-virgin. I have lived all my all life rejecting all temptations and stayed away from all non-mahram women coz I did not plan to Marry them and even if I did, I would only touch them once I married them. Why the hell would I be ok with a non-virgin
@@olegnurmagomedov750 i can't say for certain but i think the brither asked before marriage if she's still a virgin. If it didn't bother him this much he wouldn't have bothered contacting the sheikh to ask him
Not about forgiving and accepting. Just thinking about how your wife have slept with multiple or even 1 men is disgusting. even if you forgive, you will never see her the same way.
This is absolutely disgusting, and this girl belongs to the streets. I understand his pain very much. For us men, it is something that is very important to us. I would IMMEDIATELY divorce her if I heard that about her 😡😡😡
@@flashpoint1338nobody is a 100% pure but this woman destroyed this poor guy's life and it I were him i would despise every single women till the day I die because of her lies
Please also counsel your brothers against zina; you should see what us Muslim women have to deal with when finding a spouse. A lot of wayward and promiscuous men unfortunately
A man or a woman has the right to know who their prospective spouse is or was. If someone is not ok with your past then he/she is not the right one for you. Why make it complicated. If you have repented then tell him/her about your past. The hadith about concealing sins is not about confessing in private but rather bragging about it. Which is definitely a sin. But telling your finance in private would be a sin.
I say this with my heart, it is very hard for brothers and sisters in the west to find their spouses because growing in a westren country you begin to learn their culture since childhood this is why nowadays is impossible to find someone who is truthful and has a strong iman may allah help us all inshallah amin.
Tell her she can stay on the condition that she accepts that you will have more than one wife. Then marry someone younger, more beautiful, and a virgin. Treat them equally of course. She is with you because she feels you are safe, she does not truly desire you.
Like my ex, she asked my religion, I said Islam and practiced, she told me after divorcing her ex husband, she had affairs with 3 men and she spoke to me she had privacy with them, I said okey, but one day during conversation she said that one of them was Christian. By the way she is Turkish and Muslim, she claims herself Muslim. The moment I learnt that , relations was over. Not accepted. She lied at first sight, and I caught her. I can not accept a lady with this specific past. Straight 0 point to her character.
Not easy for you as she deceived you, and this was important to you. I have been married for 21 years , and have 3 beautiful children . My wife was not a virgin when we married,. However in the big picture , it doesn't really matter , it is about what happens afterwards . If she is a faithful, loyal, loving, wife , you can not ask for more . This is the most important virtue. At the end of the day this is about your ability to forgive . If you love her , forgive her and enjoy life , move on and never mention it again . Easier said then done i know . However there is real growth in adversity . You can actually grow stronger together . To forgive is to make love sacred .
With due respect Sheikh completed ignored the following aspects: 1. The mental baggage one carries after having multiple relationship with men before marriage. 2. The fact that she decieved this brother into marriage by lying. 3. Openly admitting the sin even after Allah gave her a chance for a good life. 4. This shows her level of repentance when she herself conceals her past without even asked about it. 5. His main question went unanswered that "whether he is sinful for divorcing her?" Instead i can see Shaikh was looking for a chance to bash this guy and blame shift if the brother said he asked the women about her past. A man was practicing, holding on to the Deen of Allah,search for a pious spouse as order by Allah, fulfilling all the checklist set by the women and her family, pays mahr. But what he gets in return is a fornicator who lied to marry him, a Sheikh who ignores his main question and keen to know about what wrong that man would've done and advices him to settle for less.
This sheikh is Missing the point that If he wanted a virgin as wife, and if he told her explicitly that he would marry her on condition that she was a virgin, and the woman went ahead with the marriage, that is the straight lie and deceit. The guy has every right to leave the woman.
Dear brother, you will never ever b able to lead a peaceful married life with her. Whenever you look at her or when you engage in physical relations with her, you certainly will visualize her with other men. Human minds are naturally like this. Best solution is to pray sincerely to Allah and do Istekhara. Allah knows best, so put your trust in HIM, and once you do the ISTEKHARA, remember to accept HIS answer whatever that might be. This way you not only get saved from taking a wrong decision and committing a sin but also can be relieved of the worry and guilt if you had to divorce / keep her.
I faced a similar situation. I had got intimate photos from my newly wed wife's ex. It was life's worst time. I had taken decision to accept her. Went her house to bring her, instead I was insulted by her family. She was saying whatever she had done was before marriage and she was not wrong in anyway. Then the stopped all kind of contact with me. She neither wanted to come back not wanted a divorce just she was spreading rumours and lies about me. I did not understand why they were doing like that. Then they came with a demand of some money and said they needs divorce in return of the money.
I understand the Sheikh's approach as he wants to keep the chastity of this woman and preserve her marriage. But he still could've said that It is not sinful for this young man to divorce her, He surely deserves better.
Dear Sheikh I don't agree with you and I will end comment with this Quran quote:Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure, and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honorable.Quran An-Nur Ayah 26
Assalam wa alaikum brother. I m not Sheikh but I want to give my opinion on this matter. The ayat quoted by u is the same Ayat which I chanced upon when I was roughly in class 8,...... And this single ayat helped me to avoid zina throughout my unmarried life. I knew that if I lost my virginity I would get a similar woman as my life partner.....which I obviously did not want to end up with. Today I m 43 and when I look back I am thankful to Allah that I happened to come across this ayat and got guided by Allah and thus avoided zina which is actually very common in my city Kolkata, India. But I want to tell u that if a person has repented then he or she is not longer a zina Kari or mushrik ...so this ayat no longer applies to him or her.
@@syediqbalasif8946 What you said about repentance is true, but we all have our own attitudes and ways of thinking individually. My theory is that if men can get over it, then it's fine for them, again we have to know that there are men who don't get over those things and want to a pure person, as they have been all their lives. I'm glad you shared your story with us here, but Allah knows best!
As some of you already mentioned. Forgiveness is one thing, but a future based on lies is like a house of cards. On the other hand, every person is different, but for this young man specifically, it remains a difficult one.
it's not modern thinking it's the right thinking. It's easy for us to judge, especially as men, it's really hard for us to accept something like that but anyone can come back to the right path.
I disagree with the sheikh on this.. If she hides her past mistakes and deceives her husband, her husband is NOT obligated to forgive her. If i as a Muslim man wanted to forgive my spouse, i'd much rather marry a muslim revert who was a prostitute or a stripper since at least that way, there will be transparency.
In the end of day it's the mans call. If he can be merciful to her ... Meaning if she is a good girl now. . not a HoeJabi. Then maybe it's best he reconsidering keeping her if she promise never to be involved with other men. Etc.
@@Neptune_171 bro no way ur beiung serious, eys hide ur sins but if someone made. a checklist for what they wanted, and u prwetended to fill that checklist that is lying and deciet.
Dont listen to this man, Wallahi if she lied about being virgin you should not be with her. Forgiveness is for The ignorant who did wrong not thoose with knowledge who think they can do evil and get away with it. Follow your hearts voice, honor is islam.
@@sage6321Whom you are deceiving and why ? Both the partners know what they are talking about . And if you were to take in literal sense then virginity itself a English word . And the word you are talking about is Divorcee.And in Arabic non-virgin (consensual sex , not rape etc) is used in Quran as ZANI .Which has punishment of 100 lashes .
@@sage6321 Well I don't which community are you from . But as far I know people ask about it . Not instantly but eventually yes , it is important for them . And I agree you are not allowed expose your sin . But you know we can tell our deal breaker list and expect the other person to go forward if they are okay as what what we expect them to be . Then its fine otherwise don't marry us , I am not forcing you tell each story of your life and expose your sin and just don't marry . Its not that hard for somebody who genuinely doesnt want to keep her partner in disguise. its just preference , But they will not because after whoring a lot in their prime these people want a nice settled guy who accept them . Sorry we are to born to take care this of people. We have our own life and preference if its not against the rule of Islam . And it is not . And also why these want to settle with so desperately who doesn't even want them in their real personality. 🤔
@@sage6321 You are confused, there is a thing called a pure person (virgin), chaste, in islam. There can be no opinions in this, this guy clearly asked his soon to be wife if she has been chaste and she affirmed. He was lied to and can divorce her, its about his honor as a muslim. Zina is a major haram and a filthy deed, and a muslim man can ask about this for his heart and honor to be in peace and to make sure she is the right one for him. In a islamic court she would be lashed for her sins. Allah is most Forgiving. My brothers honor was offended and my heart forced me to write.
So if she was a sex worker, took many drugs and ran through the whole neighbourhood, but repented, Sheikh is saying he wouldn't care??? Ridiculous statement. I bet if his son wanted a girl like this, he would care.
Sadly when it come marriage thy alway find the nice guy to fool. When other men with experience know she is play them. She pick him because he was her last option and there will always be fool that will be played. She mostly had anthoer person ready if he said no. 😢 I myself was played like this is way I am very careful know. I hope he doesn't have children if not run fast
Please repent to Allah about what you said. The woman is among the tawwabin now. She might have a higher status than all of us here in the comment section. And you here are talking in such a manner about someone whom Allah loves. This thing shows kibr. I understand now why Allah told us to conceal our sins. It's because human beings can be very shallow. And judge you by your past. They will forget who you are in the present, what you have done for them and will jump right back to judge you as if they are angels and not humans themselves. Brother, she told him herself and that needs a whole lot of courage and that shows how much she values honesty. She didn't "cheat" on him, since all of that was before marriage. She values his trust and told him . Plus, if she did other sins, aren't all the other people committing an even bigger sin by having arrogance in their hearts? And having arrogance even the size of a mustard seed will not let you enter Paradise. It's a hadith. Whether the man forgives her or not and divorces her or not is up to him. But we human beings have no right to judge someone's Eman especially in the present. And one more hadith brother, this is a very important one: Sahih Muslim 2643 a Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) reported that Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) who is the most truthful (of the human beings) and his being truthful (is a fact) said: "Verily your creation is on this wise. The constituents of one of you are collected for forty days in his mother's womb in the form of blood, after which it becomes a clot of blood in another period of forty days. Then it becomes a lump of flesh and forty days later Allah sends His angel to it with instructions concerning four things, so the angel writes down his livelihood, his death, his deeds, his fortune and misfortune. By Him, besides Whom there is no god, that one amongst you acts like the people deserving Paradise until between him and Paradise there remains but the distance of a cubit, when suddenly the writing of destiny overcomes him and he begins to act like the denizens of Hell and thus enters Hell, and another one acts in the way of the denizens of Hell, until there remains between him and Hell a distance of a cubit that the writing of destiny overcomes him and then he begins to act like the people of Paradise and enters Paradise." This hadith should humble us because it is tell us of a very scary scenario that can befalls us anytime if we don't ask Allah for guidance. It is Allah, by Who's Permission and Will, we do good. Then who are we to judge that sister? She might have stronger Eman than all of us. May Allah guide us and make it such that we never anger Him by hurting the people He loves and His Creation. Ameen.
The man is clearly hurt and immediately gets interrogated. I think its important to remember that just because it's a woman doesn't mean she's innocent. It's easy to say you won't worry when you're not in the position as this person. I too would be extremely hurt with my partner, that's just a fact of life.
As mentioned by Shaykh it still depends on the brother to decide. We have the same situation, my wife was a christian, she lost her parents at a young age, and had a relationship, and was being abused and ra*ed by several men. She converted to Islam, and I married her when she was 17. She is very shy, I didn't know her past relationship and her trauma until we got married; I was shocked. Instead of divorcing her I still accept and love her because I see her repentance, and she is a loving, sweet, caring and religious wife. If she sincerly repents and Allah forgives then who am I not to forgive her past.
May Allah bless your marriage but a revert who was not aware of the guidelines of Islam is not the same as a Muslim who committed zina whilst knowing the severity of the sin
Maa shaa Allah brother,may Allah reward you for your kind and generous heart which many people are lacking in the comment section
Perfect thought
U r right but U have to listen this video .U need it to listen again because still U HV confusion same like the person who asked question with Sheikh@@Anonymous-yh4ho
InshaAllah Allah continue to bless your marriage. It depends really on the man if he forgives her, he should never mention her past again. If he thinks he can't get over her past, he better think it through whether to continue this union or not.
You can hear the pain and sadness in his voice 😢
May Allah make it easy for him ameen.
Ameen
@@ahmedchowdhury8012 ever heard of betrayal?
@@ahmedchowdhury8012 Dayuuth
I think that's just cause he's from Norway
@@ahmedchowdhury8012 😂
This poor brother sounds innocent and all he wanted was someone innocent and clean like himself at the end of the day she lied to him and betrayed one of the most important things to a man especially getting married for the first time
What About Many who Avoid this Serious Sin Due to Allah's Fear And knowing that Allah and Various Prophet's has Warned it's Severe consequences & Punishments .. In Grave • Judgement Day .. Qayamah and Jahannam .. Those who Prefer Modesty Over Shamelessness ..
Immorality & Indecency Are Innocents😶Wat the Hell😤
I Hate when People who Call ones who Save Themselves From This Utterly Immoral Act as Innocent and Clean 😠
That Means who does this Major Sin Are Transgressors..Impure & Dirty 😤
Everybody marries For the First time only not many can think of 2nd or 3rd marriage 😤
True.
She didn't lie to him. As a matter of fact, she was honest with him. As sheik mentioned it was her right not to disclose her past to anyone including her husband. He very manipulatively coerced her into disclosing her past, now he has to live with the consequences weather he stay in this marriage or not.
Secondly, why didn't he ask about virginity before getting married, if it was that important 🤔
First of all she told him without him asking her. Then the Sheikh mentions you have someone who has been married before or someone who is yet to be married.
No virgin noir virginity, has been mentioned.
Don't look at it as betrayal, because she committed the sin against herself and it was to be reconciled with Allah.
So this is a matter she has with Allah.
The problem isn't why she is not a virgin, the problem is she lied.
of course she will lie because she know's nobody will look at her the same but if it was a guy nobody will say anything to him ..
its not that she lied its that she cant expose her sin. And the one who repents is like one without sin. What is sinful here is that she exposed what Allah kept hidden and now her sin is not forgiven
@@jb.8983then she shouldn't have sin. Women should be taught about accountability
@@luzdani11she literally lied and it's not permissible to lie, except in 3 cases. This does not fall under those cases. Stop justifying it
The brother wanted a virgin wife and even stipulated it as a condition, she lied to him saying she's a virgin and now he is supposed to just bend backwards and accept such behaviour?!
I accept that people repent from their sins, but there is a reason that zina is prohibited and people are told to stay away from it - because of situations like this. If this woman is to be divorced by her husband, what would happen to her? zina carries consequences not only in this life, but in the hereafter aswell. Let's stop acting like the brother is spineless and actually accept that he was basically deceived
Yes a relationship that start with a lie, only will go one way that’s down!
SubhanAllah, it must be like a knife into the heart for the young man.
R u revert ? MashaAllah 🔥
@@MR.FlyingMonkey no, I am born muslim alhamdulillah
@@Idris.1994.Norwayeveryone is born upon the fitrah ie muslim
@@user-ue4fh5mv9s You know what I meant 😏
Yes Sheikh can be savage af
The people who did adulterous actions loved this answer from the Sheikh as I read the comments. “Just forgive and move” while this young boy was patient all this time to marry a good woman, but got deceived. It’s a hard pill to swallow. It’s a personal matter and he should make that personal decision. He deserves better definitely. Especially since it was his condition for the marriage. It’s basically a breach of contract. Anyone would return a car that was sold as brand new, but secretly was rolled back thousands of km and had multiple previous owners.
Sheikh is speaking with knowledge, are you? If not then stop khalas! This life is a test,you can be tested by wealth,betrayal,being miserable etc etc.. If you want untouched hoors you prepare for jannah there you will find in shaa Allah.. In this life don't be ungrateful to Allah, submit to Allah as you believe in Allah and Islaam given to us. May Allah guide us, Ameen.
@@Answer_the_truth The good Sheikh gave his good advice about forgiveness and moving on as good moral, but he also said it’s a personal matter. Of course we should follow our religious teachings and forgive as much we can, but let’s not normalise the act of deceiving people and tolerate misbehaviour under the disguise of “Life is a test”. Because deceiving people is also against religious teachings.
If you tolerate this, then someone could take advantage of you and say “yeah deal with it, because life is a test”. Allah does not say that you should be taken advantage of or else you’re ungrateful. So where do you get that we’re ungrateful towards Allah if we speak out against injustice? May Allah guide us all and also give you a piece of common sense…
@@KubiIay Ameen, may Allah give me a piece of common sense, Ameen. No problem. No one has to tell you what filth they did, if she is not married then she is not a divorcee and won't be counted as such, so that time she should not say she did that, why should she bring trouble to herself, it's between her and Allah.. When she repented that's it, she doesn't have to tell to human, yes if she has defect of not conceiving child, if she wears a wig etc, she should tell that and not deceive future husband. But, this thing,No! That's what i was saying, Sheikh is speaking with knowledge and you with emotions. Husband has right to do what he wants after knowing that, only advice is given, but I'm talking about revealing about their past affairs, which should not be done. If not then bring history of what all you did, and she did, if every human does that, no one would want to see each other's faces.. So it's better to make it concealed which Allah wants it to be concealed. And I'm also layman... So I'm also not important than what people of knowledge say.
@@Answer_the_truthi don’t mean to be rude, but following blindly someone because he is a sheikh is the biggest mistake a Muslim can make. You have to assess if he speaks the truth or not. In that case, yes he spoke right, you can’t disclose your sins, BUT you can’t lie to brother. She did, she betrayed him and started the marriage on a LIE. How can there be marriage if there is no trust ? So yes, in the end the choice is to the brother, if I was in his case, I would marry a second wife or divorce after a time because unfortunately I could not pass over it. It’s not even the fact that she was not a virgin, it’s fact that she lied to me, that she robbed me of that choice. May Allah bless you.
@@Blackbeard1222 May Allah bless you too, I am not talking about following blindly, Sheikh Assim is talking based on Islaam, we are talking based on emotions, he also said it is husband's choice.
This sheik is missing the point. If he wanted a virgin as wife, and if he told her explicitly that he would marry her on condition that she was a virgin, and the woman went ahead with the marriage, that is straight lying and deceit. The guy has every right to feel revolted.
@@samia6888the brother clearly mentioned in the start of the call he made it one of his requirements before marriage
@@samia6888 Before the marriage she told she is virgin but after the marriage she told she is not the married isn't valid in the fast place
Everyone is saying like they've seen it happening with their eyes,he mentioned this requirements,she said virgin before and after said not,bla bla bla.... don't you guys have some real business!
This is deception and he can ask for the Nikah to be absolved and she should return him his mahr
@@cyberspace7208 fine, if they feel like it,they will bro...
forgiving doesn't mean the past wont affect the future , a women who had multiple sexual relationships will have traumas , bonding issues , flashbacks with the other mens during intercourse , comparing and so much more deeper and hidden vices . Zina is haram because you're supposed to preserve not only your body but especially your heart and mental health .
I repeat , Forgiving does not mean the past wont affect the future .
Exactly..mainly in our generation when people's bad deeds are sometimes saved on the Internet
so if she repents she's not allowed to get married and have a life? what if men who committed the Sin can women say the same thing about him and also get a divorce?
@jb.8983 she should only marry A man who was like her and not ruin a pure man's life
@@user-ue4fh5mv9s thats true she can marry a man who commited Zina and repented like her ..
If Allah swt is prepared and most loving and generous to forgive a person who repents, who are you to not forgive?
Keeping your sins a secret is one thing. And lying about your secrets is another thing. Nobody has the right to lie to their future spouse.
I agreed your nice one word
Imagine staying out of that kind of life imagining to get a spouse similar and this happening. She should have said no to the marriage maybe give another excuse that was his condition. I hope If she repents they forget this and live a beautiful good life
But when did she lie ?
It's not like he asked her about this and she said no I have never did zina
@@SehrishAhmed-hq5bf at the beginning he says it was a requirement. So before marriage he communicated that he wanted a Muslima that prays and to be a virgen like him
Exactly!
If you were lied to, then this does ground for a divorce.
You are the only second or third woman here to sympathize with the man and accepting that she did wrong. May Allah bless our life with good woman around us.
@@sufi7460 I am just trying to be fair regardless of gender. Nowadays, men take men’s side blindly, and females take females side blindly. This is not right.
A man has no right to ask if a woman is a virgin or not before marrying her, of course he can look around and do research with family members to know her character as to whether she hangs out with boys or goes clubbing etc but u can bluntly ask them
If they are virgin as it’s their privacy and it’s between her and Allah and she will have answer Allah for her actions
@@kitty5872 if a woman is bluntly admitting she is a virgin, and then husband finds out that's a lie (because falsehood always perishes) then the man has every right to be mad here. She the mistake of deception.
Its not between ALLAH and her it's between ALLAH her and him +him and him @@kitty5872
As a girl my self..i cant imagine n think to keep such spouse in my life.. may allah protect us from such people ...forgiveness is good but not everyone got strength to forgive n forget the fact that his or her spouse is a second hand person 😢... am dying to imagine it wallah..ya akhi may allah heal ur heart n emotions and do it what is best for you in ur life
Sis I finally find 1 woman (you) who can understand it to some level. The agony that you are feeling, multiply it with 1000 and that's how much we men feel when we are betrayed in this way. May Allah protect us all from such people.
@@olegnurmagomedov750 Allahuma ameen
What happens when your husband marries another women? Men and women arent the same in reality. Your line of thinking is bizarre for a woman. No hate just an observation. It is biologicaly proven for men so kind of an odd statement from a woman as biologically women place a great deal of emphasis on other things (looks, money, stability, height, competence, status eventhough they dont admit they do but we all know it)
Proud of you sis...
You are the only second or third woman here to sympathize with the man and accepting that she did wrong. May Allah bless our life with good woman around us.
comments as usual defending the woman, this is 100% wrong, if someone makes 1 of his conditions that the spouse has to be a virgin, and she lies and pretends she is. That s 100% wrong, that is lying and deciet. If she did fulfill the criteria, why did she pretend she did? Why do people always give women a green pass oin things that are blatantly and clearly wrong. I cant believe people are justifying lying and deception
Hardcore simping has already infiltrated the Ummah, just observe.
The society is a feminist simp!! It's okay if she did it.. Forgive her cause Allah is merciful. She lied because she was afraid of society. Where was her fear when she was committing zina?? The amount of people justifying zina is so awful. These same people will come attacking a man if he talks about a second marriage! We live in a society where we are told to forgive a zania but it's a taboo to marry twice, even if she is a widow!!
@@javedhashmi3315you‘re so right , but this Verse keeps me steadfast as a man 2:228 where god says that men are preferred a bit over women; I think because of the very fact you mentioned
@coolerthetyrant7923 wallah many ppl inthe comments acting like zina is just casual and the virgin husband is wrong for finding out she used to gangbang. Astakfirullah, imagine me telling her that im a multi-millonare and after marrage i reveal that im dead broke and in debt. How would she feel? You might say this is not the same. No akhi this is same. If i say im vroke and in debt will she marry me? Will society look at me the same way?
@@samir_chogood point, at least you can possibly become rich in the future. But you can't undo Zinah. So lying about wealth is actually a lesser evil. This sheikh is really giving bad advice 😢
Make a checklist, want multiple kids, want a meher under certain amount, want only 1 vacation a year, no past relations idk anything you feel is important. Tell her to look at it and then say if she fits the requitments or not. She doesnt have to answer which requirement she doesnt fit so it saves her from admitting publicslly to any sins and saves the guy from a partner that doesnt fit any requirements. Eg she had past relations, says she doesnt fit but guy will have no idea exactly which one she doesnt fit, could be her wanting multiple kids etc, and he looks for someone who will fit the requirements.
Yes this is the right way. Did you find out about this way from Yahya Growth (the revert)?
Wait thats actually quite smart. I will apply this process in sha Allah. Thank you, may Allah increase you in wisdom even further
@@maazmustafa2322 I don't know about the revert unfortunately, I've just seen this topic discussed many times and tried thinking of an easy solution. I've tried commenting this on tiktok comment sections sometimes and the like but it's not a very popular method people use. Though now I might check out his channel to see what else he has to say,
is this an interview or getting to know each other before marriage. this will probably put her off
@@ilk_tek2894 you can encourage her to also make her own checklist, its always better to make sure you're both compatible without spending too much time investing in eachother only to break it off with a broken heart down the road. personally I consider it a great way to show that your serious about your intentions.
In the Quran is mentions a pure woman for a pure man and adulterer for an adulterer.
Yes believing women for believing man. Quran 33:35 Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allāh often and the women who do so - for them Allāh has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.
It’s regarding people who are actively in that lifestyle. If he/she changed their lifestyle, they don’t fall into this negative groups. And Allah knows best.
@@mbb1849 No, virginity in a woman is a permanent change. Don't soften islam because you have lesser expectations for yourself
So does an a non muslim who has accepted islam still considered a kafir. We call such a person muslim not a non believer but our brother or sister in islam. Same thing can be applied to adulterer if he/she has repented they are pure
@@laeeqkhan2069they are pure but not virgin
So virgin for virgin
Being a virgin, he's very inexperienced in these matters so he'd never have known. I feel for him. He should divorce her if he can come to terms with giving up his mahr
He got double whammied!
Does the mahr become invalid if the person lies in a marriage contract?
@@beast-master2094 good question. insha'Allah Sheikh can answer for us
I am a christian . Psychologists say that humans don't change and repeat mistakes. That is why addicts and alcoholics and gamblers usually repeat past mistakes despite knowing the consequences of their actions.
Unfortunately someone who has had multiple partners in the past is more likely to cheat in the future. Ask your partner about their past and you will see your future.
She lied to him before and the only reason she told him the truth is because she realised he would find out eventually . She probably assumes he is a weak character and won't leave her . If he were my son I would tell him to run and save him multiple problems ahead .
I am a psychologist. And I am very happy to tell you that your understanding that we say that humans don't change is profoundly mistaken! Humans can change profoundly. And, unless I am very mistaken, I think most Christians, such as St Paul, for example, would agree.
@notmyfirstlanguage Obviously people can change but if you look at the statistics.
Unfortunately relapse rates for individuals who enter recovery from a drug or alcohol addiction are quite high. Studies reflect that about 40-60% of individuals relapse within 30 days of leaving an inpatient drug and alcohol treatment center, and up to 85% relapse within the first year.
@@notmyfirstlanguageHumans rarely change from their past mistakes. Stop misleading, I'm also a psychologist.
He didn’t answer the question. No one is saying he needs to forgive her. Now if she said she is a virgin and ends up that she isn’t one, then she lied. Usually a liar is a liar so run
He didn’t mention if she said she was or not
Plus there is a hidden answer
He gave his answer actually. He said “if she has already repented and now became a good muslim, then she should not tell anyone about her old sins.”
And yes, he added about forgiveness too, so husband can make his choice.
She lied, but we don’t know both of them, her situation etc. , that’s why it would be wrong to tell him to run from her.
@@kar1a7
No, she deceived the man to get the marriage.
If I deceive you in a business contractm, so that I take a bigger cut than you, would you still just forgive me for deceiving you and continue the contract?
@@kar1a7but if someone asks you dont you have to lie to conceal your sin?
@@kar1a7
That means we can have sex before marriage as much as we want?
We just need to repent?
Is this really Islam ?
It would be different if she wasn't a Muslim before, But if she was a Muslim and had se then, is that really the case?
That means as a man we can also do it!!
Do you see how absurd it becomes? We don't know whether Allah has forgave her or not it comes from Allah.
It doesn't mean that Sheikh should start attacking the questioner by telling him you are not a man if you will not forgive her and then telling it depends on him.
It is the process of making a cuck. And it's wrong
If she becomes pure, pious and repent of her previous sins... That's the whole point sheikh. These women who kept whoring around tend to remain pure for a few years then get engaged in fornications and scandals in future. And you didn't mention the fact these women have violated their husbands right. They basically scammed their husbands. If they think they have become pure, then they better go to jannah alone. It's not obligatory for men to stay with one wife they can marry another one if they want at the same time.
Often times it's a sinner who makes the most noise.
For every time you sin, Allah provided an avenue for you to repent and seek Allah's mercy and forgiveness.
And if it happens again, you again repent and regret your actions. If it happens a thousand times, you repent a thousand. There is No one time Allah will Not forgive you becoz you repeated the same mistake. Our Lord is God of forgiveness and mercy. As Prophet Ibraheem said:
He said, “None despairs of his Lord's mercy except those who have strayed.”
Quran 15:56
Why are you triggered, you've been too pushy in the comments? Mind your business if you aren't man enough. @@saidhashi2856
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who:
- Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.)
- Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship.
- Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past.
- When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past.
- It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not.
Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
@@saidhashi2856The problem isn't the fact that she commited zina. She lied.
@@Rd-88
So lying is Not forgivable according to you?
Allah forgives every sin. And with repentance No sin is big.
I like sheiks answer but I think the guy feels betrayed and lied to. The guy was very clear in wanting a virgin b/c he’s virgin himself and his wife lied to him. She tricked him. She could’ve just ghosted him or broke things off before it escalated to marriage…
I was in similar situation when a guy lied about his past just to appease me. If he was gonna lie, might as well keep up with it but instead he revealed the truth at the end. Obviously I reacted angrily but I just needed time to cool off. Instead HE wanted to break up.
So I say they just need time away from each other. Don’t involve other women but just use that time to realize how important the person is to you NOW and the marriage. The wife also needs to apologize and try redeem herself. She gotta show how much she loves him. If after some time he doesn’t think he can move past it or forgive her then yea divorce….:
One solution is he can take another wife. That would solve things very quickly.
@@AliSidTex yea he can take another virgin wife if his country allows it if virginity is so important to him even though now he won’t be one. You know our Prophet’s only virgin wife was Aisha….
@@user-zm3no5xb6t but if his country or society doesn't allow him to marry others, then he should avoid getting married to a woman who is not going to give him everything he needs like virginity. Otherwise he will start to resent and hate her like a chain on his ankle.
@@AliSidTex yeah like that's the greatest solution on the planet😅😂. You said "solve things very quickly" ; how so and can you give me an example pwease!?
thats the point people miss . She tricked him
Allah is more much much more forgiving than us humans, don't compare it. Most men care about the past, it affects the intimacy in marriage, it is not something automatically fixed because she is forgiven for it. If a virgin man wants a virgin woman, there is nothing wrong with seeking it, if she lies about it then this is sin from her.
But divorce is not easy for a man in the west. Might be same for him since he's from a European country. In US, even if a marriage lasted for 1 night, the court can put lot's of pressure on the man to divide his assets and income.
@Maxwell_V this brother made a big mistake and ruined his life....the only thing now to do is run away to a far away land
@@user-ue4fh5mv9s which mistake did the brother make? the girl lied to him, how can he avoid that?
@jesterequinox he shouldn't have married the woman without a thorough background check and making sure she was upon the Deen and to be honest personally why did he marry a Muslim in Norway??? He could try marrying a Christian Norwegian girl and perhaps given her dawah and if she wasn't a vigin it would be understandable
I can understand where the Sheikh is coming from. However, if I were in the brother's shoes I would start considering divorce.
Studies have shown that women who have had multiple sexual partners have a greatly reduced ability to pair bond and are more likely to divorce. They are also more likely to cheat in the marriage.
If this were an Islamic society governed by Sharia law then I would be inclined to agree with the Shiekh's attitude.
However, the fact is in the West, men, especially muslim men, are operating from a deficit, and thus, can not afford to be so forgiving for a woman's past.
Furthermore, people need to be disincentivised to be promiscious before marriage, and one way to do this is to subject them to some measure of consequence in society.
You are disgusting. The Prophet's wives were almost all divorced, meaning they were married before, some multiple times. Fear Allah in what you say.
lol good luck trying to disincentivize promiscuity in western society
And you think Promiscuous men are satisfied in a marriage with one wife?. He will continue to cheat and seek variety bc that's what he's so used to. That's what the data shows for men too. It also shows that men who have had multiple partners have low satisfaction rates in marriage.
@@hafsaummmusa9923the prophets wives were all divorced or widows you dolt
Please Elaborate "operating from deficit" means
Sheikh is not him and he is not Sheikh. By the way... sheikh did not answer his question.
Yess, he did, repent, the past is in the past, move one. Listen again.
@@friedala4702but his question was if he would be sinful by divorcing her?
@@friedala4702bro
Past is past
But a contract is a contract
It was in the contract that she had to be a virgin
She lied bro
@@alaminislam7204but he told him in the end that it was his call. Which means its not sinful to divorce, since the sheik would not tell him he has a choice if the choice is sinful.
@@friedala4702 why do women ay ok tos the corruption in this world
If you want to have a virgin wife physically and emotionally, pick her from conservative Patriarchal family, most of them are in conservative societies in islamic countries, also you should ask the father if she's a virgin or divorced, and you should write in the marriage contract that she is a virgin too, if someone refuse your demands, don't look back and move on to the next family, having a conservative housewife is a bless.
But more often then not the families from these 3rd world counties are looking for a way out and marry the guy from the west only for citizenship and then leave
Thanks for the advice brother ❤
@@sufi7460 You're welcome brother 🌹
@@sufi7460 This is just common sense, even traditional non-Muslim societies know this. Today we are forced to explain such simple things because of the massive westernization of human society...
I live in a conservative society yet women still have premarital sex, but they lie to their husbands about their past.
This is one of the reasons we should recite the dua mentioned in Sura Al Furqan ayat 74:
"Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us a leader for the righteous."
May Allah calm the heart of this man and bless the couple in this life and the afterlife
Why shouldn't the sister be righteous when she repented to Allaah and regrets her past sins?
@@inayah6990what if the guy was in gay relationships before his marriage and concealed it . Would that be okay if he repents 😕. Would you marry a man who kept that from you?🤔
@@inayah6990
Because she deceived the man in order to get the marriage. Deception is not the mark of a righteous person.
@@inayah6990will you marry a pedo or murderer if he repented?How do you know Allah forgave them?
She should tell him so she doesn’t give him an STD.
She can get tested for that beforehand
In Islam, one is Not suppose to disclose his or her past sins to anyone. And disclosing it does not solve anything but rather it creates mistrust and negativity. No dwelling in the past. As for the health part, it's recommended for both of them.
She still should be punished for that
@@KD400_
Priority is Not punishment. Priority is forgiveness and none disclosure.
The man has a right to know,
I dont like the answers this sheikh gives sometimes. Its very one sided sometimes. Its straight up if she lied to you about being a virgin before marriage, divorce her and find a equal spouse.
He said its his call at the end of the day
Brother basically he gave a religiously accurate answer. If she has disclosed things herself, it might be that she is being honest ans regrets. However, everyone in the comment basically get in the shoes of the questioner and then giving answers as if it happened to them, that's why many answers are emotional 😆
@@Maxwell_VA religiously based answer doesn't cease from it being an opinion.
@@bronzebueno this is the dumbest shit i heard in a long time. respectfully you are nobody, you have no qualifications on islam nor are you learned. This is a response a munafiq would say
@@Maxwell_V she Iied and deceived by making him believe she was a virgin when he put that in the marriage contract. She should’ve not mentioned it to hide her sins not deceive . You’d have a point if the husband didn’t put it in the marriage contract
Imagine you buy a stolen car and they tell you the car isn't stolen. She deceived him and lied
This Shaykhs position will encourage women to live a haram lifestyle, and then lie to potential spouses about their past.
@@AlpLimIndFoxZina is literally violating an Islamic principle
so true brother i can literally see some so called muslim women pulling this and saying ''the shayk said as long as i repent everything is ok'' and then they continue the haram activities
i don't understand how ppl don't get simple things right
the woman in question can be anyone not particularly a pious woman [ im not talking abt this case, im talking abt ANY case] i have seen so many young girls get into haram relationship either cuz they want male attention or all of their friends have relationships so the feeling to be included makes them to choose haram
and believe me none of this girls ever think of what Allah has commanded and they don't repent at all for their haram relationships
???? ...... how do i know that they don't repent?
bcuz they dont even pray salah or recite quran
i'm ashamed to say this but they don't even know what is haram and what is halal
i have to teach them that any intentional physical contact with opposite gender is haram and this girls started calling me backward like fr
@@AlpLimIndFoxso u do agree that we should all commit zina and then just repent b4 marriage? I mean that's what you're basically saying. Times change but islam doesn't.
That's why he's just a sheikh lol not a scholar
@@AlpLimIndFoxwhat is haram is haram despite time,society etc. You can't justify wrongdoing just because the sin is happening in Las Vegas
I disagree with sheikh. A virgin is a woman that has never had sexual intercourse, and the Quran also says no sex before marriage.
Terminate the marriage as you will never be able to trust her!
It will always be at the back of your mind and especially when you are intimate. She will alwsys compare you to othet partnets and never be satisfied.
You should have done your research befire agreeing to marriage!
A woman will never reveal this no matter what
Listen to yourselves would you say this about a man
@@shairafaiza7261yes absolutely. Next question?
@@ibiro868she will be exposed by Allah.Deception is a trait of Satan.
its sad..Having multiple past relationships means you won't be satisfied with one or get bored with current one eventually..
That's correct a woman like that can never be trusted and was only looking for a good man so he can ben her way. The chances of her being disloyal are very high especially if he accepts it.
What do you mean? My wife has had 2 or 3 relationships in the past.. will she get bored of me?
@sameurrahman-kr3wb You will have kids with her who will have the genetic makeup of some of her past lovers including yours, ofcourse. Research it.
@@sameurrahman-kr3wb you also have relationship before marriage.Sorry so you saying your wife commit zina before marriage
because you realise that people are not interesting as you imagined them to be
As a muslimah, leave her... She lied, was on multiple relationships... Ultimate red flag
May Allah bless you
As a muslim Alhamdulillah, I advise you to delete your profile picture
@captainjackuniversal Abusing me of being sinful..at this moment you're sinning.. Learn the religion and fear Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
@captainjackuniversal And now assuming again.. I don't need to open anything to see that's she's presenting herself... Like I said before fear Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala...You'll have a lot of problems if you're acting like this
@captainjackuniversal Fear Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
That woman is a snake. And I say this as a woman. She felt comfortable now that he’s stuck and married to her to tell him. But before she lied and said she was pure just so he could keep being interested in her. He loved a different version of her in his head. That woman doesn’t exist after this betrayal. She lied. And she’ll lie again.
Find yourself another woman, brother. One that isn’t ashamed to be herself with you. And one that doesn’t deceive you when it matters, only to shatter your heart and trust just because she felt guilty and wanted to take that weight off her shoulders.
Skip.
This is so well put I want to like it twice
Sis she somewhere must've felt guilty for keeping it from him, we don't know the complete scenario then how can we make assumptions and call her a snake? It's a request, please don't assume things on your own.
Ah that's true I can just say to everyone doesn't matter if man or woman it can be really riskful if the partner had a different life before because some of them can not really close the past and it will bring high potentially problems and in the relationship of two person it's really hard if the one was waiting for a virgin like hisself but ofc it's different if someone is a revert and made a lot of tauba. May Allah help us all in every aspects of life 🤲
@@afifahossain5717 I see, but I’m judging based on her actions that he provided. Sure, calling her a snake is a bit much, but what she did wasn’t something small. She broke this man to pieces with that information. Information had he known before marriage, probably wouldn’t have made him marry her.
This man stayed pure until his marriage and wanted a woman who wanted the same. There’s nothing wrong with having standards (especially since he applied those very same standards to himself).
It’s not fair for her to deceive him and then shatter his heart just because keeping that secret was eating her alive from guilt. It’s also not fair to expect him to feel okay with any of this. He deserves better.
Becarefull calling her names. Everbdy juste assume she lied but we dont know for sure. What if the husband is the one that assumed that she was a virgin?
There is nothing wrong in divorcing his wife its not Haram at all Shaykh is stretching it for no reason Shaikh is like if you asked for forgiveness to Allah its all okay but only between the individual and Allah azza wajal.
Just imagine if a person smokes for years even though he knows its haram and then after years of smoking he repented and decided to never smoke ever again doesn't mean his lungs will go back to infancy level health it will have consequences.
But for this I would say this to the guy he should reconsider the decision because his wife herself told him all of this, this shows what kind of a person she is now. But still if he doesn't want to have a wife who has been touched by other men then divorce her there is also nothing wrong it cause if he doesn't divorce her this will eat him inside so its better to divorce her.
he saying if she had repented, give her chance.
people of repent are loved by Allah
@@farhank8336 watch the video again
Sheikh has much more wisdom than you, that's why he is stretching and not just saying "just divorce." Divorce is a huge thing and should be the very last step if anything else doesn't work. Also him knowing now she was not a virgin is just a "problem in his head". Because before it seems it was no problem he was happy with her. It's just the information that seemed to have changed his opinion about her. That shows you can deal with it if you want to and forget about it and continue as you did before.
I think the Sheikh's point is that Zina is a sin on Allah; so if Allah can forgive it, who are we to still hold it against them. It is not like it was committed against him, since they were not together then.
@@tahirballikaya213 there was no problem because it's a very new marriage till now.
And Shaykh was stretching it without any reason he seemed more interested in knowing how the guy find it that his wife isn't virgin when in the beginning he said he didn't asked her but Shaykh Assim already had his gun's barrel pointed at him.
I don't need to be knowledgeable like shaykh to understand it. And shaykh does this a lot of the times.
Nobody should suffer in a marriage that is it.
Never liked this Sheikh, he has no empathy, just straight up blatantly spits out whatever he says. Didn’t even end up addressing exactly what the brother asked
genuinely tho like what else do you expect him to say. brother he can’t just come out and be like ya ya not totally divorce her. he can’t advice people to divorce others when he’s a public figure because people will point fingers at him and blame him for breaking homes. ofc he’s gonna look at the positive side and encourage him to forgive and forget.
He is a celebrity youtube sheikh. What else do you expect from this man.
The real ulama like Sheikh Fawzan, and others are unknown to the common public
This isn’t just about repentance the woman is DISGUSTING! As a muslimah myself I am disturbed by this. Alhamdulillah we can repent but something like this is intentional and done from ill-intentions and isn’t easy to dismiss, I hope the brother recovers from this trauma and finds someone better
So you think a virgin only marry virgin
Personally i believes good woman will have good man
Its not about who would marry who but who this person wanted to marry. Of he was honest with him being virgin and set it as a condition for the opposite side than he has a right to have what he wants and the woman is a major sinner because she lied, deceit and their whole marriage is based of off a lie
@@MuhammadFaisal-np7tc 100%
@@htsjunkbucket1364virginity in Islam means someone who didn’t marry before. Zina is not considered taking virginity so she did not lie nor is it appropriate to ask such a question to begin with. You cannot ask Muslims if they committed zina in the past
im 28 now. As a man who never even kissed a single girl im afraid to getting married. because what happens around me makes me worry that will i get a pure girl!
Same bro , Now I had no intention to marry . All my fantasy are gone .
@@mohdfaizansiddiqui1171Same
@@mohdfaizansiddiqui1171Same here, most of the Muslim men take Islam seriously and stay Halal, but but end up getting haram wives. While most of the Muslim women do not care about Islam except to wear hijabs due to family pressure, and enjoys this worldly life with these acts and when her family pressures her to get married or she herself thinks about to get married then she'll find any innocent Muslim man to trap him and get married.
[𝐑𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐛 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫] Prophet ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- said: "Allah will build a house in Heaven for whoever is diligent in observing 12 Sunnah Rak'at (as follows): 4 Rak'at before and 2 after the Zhuhr (Midday) Prayer, 2 after the Maghrib (Sunset Prayer), 2 after the ‘Isha (Evening) Prayer and 2 before the Fajr (Dawn) Prayer." (Hadith sahih narrated by at-Tirmidhi No. 379 and by others. Hadith No. 6183 in Sahih al-Jami’.)
I'm sorry to point out that it's simply arrogant of your need for attention by quoting hadith, as well meaning as the hadith is by itself, that has nothing to do with the subject matter being discussed and seems immature and selfish. I don't know you so please do not take this personally. I wish you the best but please try to give importance to what is being discussed. What does praying daily 12 sunnah rakahs have to do with divorce in Islam? Is this the appropriate place for that info or did you just want attention?
@@naimanwar8113 Reminders a good even if they are not relevant. As every Muslim reading this will hopefully learn something new.
@@naimanwar8113 I got angry too but then I realized poor guy/girl is just trying to remind us that it's more important to pray then to get attached to worldly things. Besides, what has world given us anything other than anxiety and stress. Only peace is found with God.
@@naimanwar8113 Fear Allah before attacking someone giving us a general reminder.
@@zainsdifferent5014 I can say the same for you for being judgmental and misinterpreting my comments as other than helping where you are obviously an enabler. Perhaps you are seeking attention as well. Look to your own.
Leave her for lying to you. You deserve better.
Did you even listen to the sheikh?
If she had really lied she would have been saved from this shit that's happening now,she chose to disclose the truth without any force,use some brains before advising such drastic things
She presented herself as someone pure. That is deceitful. I’m sure you wouldn’t be asking this question if the person married to her was your son or brother.
@@loshakopija Sheikh has no authority. He is no scholar
@@naseemafarheenshaik8936 so now the truth is here it's no problem?
The Sheikh's advice works in a society where polygamy is accepted. If you marry a woman with a past, it's not the end of the world as you can still potentially marry a virgin in the future. But in a monogamous society, your wife becomes a liability not an asset. Resentment can grow against her in your heart, especially if she knew what you wanted and tricked you into marrying her. You will feel you became her slave because you have to provide for her and she is stopping you from achieving the kind of woman you actually want.
Finally the answer I wanted to hear❤!
Exactly,
The problem is that he was lied to. Even for society that accepts polygyny his advice is not acceptable, it's wrong to deceive someone like this. You don't have to confess sins, but you can understand that someone wants a virgin and stay away if you're not one.
@@equityjustice2695 yes this is why I cannot justify the idea of "secret" polygany. It seems to be just cheating.
@@AliSidTex there is no such thing as secret polygyny, because by default every Muslim man is allowed to have multiple wives. That is his right as given be Allah swt and no one can take that away. He doesn't need the permission of any wife to take another. So there is no claim of deceit. And marriage, even so called secret polygny is not the same as cheating or Zinah. So to say "it seems" Is wrong and sinful, because you are going against What Allah swt decreed. Allah swt is not unjust. A wife can only put in her marriage contract, that she wants the right to divorce if he takes a second wife. She can't prohibit him from ever taking a second wife. Women need to stop making marriage difficult. Polygyny is natural for men.
So if we(men) forgive and accept the wrongdoings of the past of the female, Won't this be normalized for the other women?They'll think everything will be fine, let's party hard till marriage.
Tell me, should women forgive men?
'It is not allowed for men and women to be non virgin before their first marriage'.
Pls word it better :)
It's not other women's promiscuity that normalizes promiscuity in women. It's men's promiscuity. It's seeing that society doesn't really care about chastity since only women's chastity is focused on and men's lack of is accepted. This is what women do not buy into. It's the same trend with women from all races and religions. Remember, the weak follow the strong
If chastity really matters, start with the leaders/shepherds of society; your sons and men
@coolerthetyrant7923 what does the sheikh say?
And what about women? Should they forgive men who do zina?
@@mymuslimthoughts6903 The sad reality is, most women don't care if a guy has bad past as long as the guy has a promising future. But that thought process is wrong. As a Muslim women, you should preserve yourself until marriage and you should also find a god fearing man who saved himself until marriage as well.
Its really easy. No shaykh needed. No scholar needed. No bin baz or uthaymeen needed.
A man knows what to do. As for the weak amongst us , wallahi it is your weakness that causes you the most pain.
if that make him feel sad be with her ..before more bad thing happen just divorce..
disgusting I would be furious if I were him, instant divorce.
💯
I’d be too. All my life I’m saving everything for the one and only worthy one no way I’m giving it for free it’s my right
It means you are calling sunnah disgusting???? Wow !!! What a selfish person you are.
You will get both what you may not want. Allah works very different way. If put hatred on someone you will taste that hate.😂
@@tanimacad828Your comment is baseless.
Man, you can just feel the hurt in the voice of this brother..... I just lost massive amounts of respect for the Sheikh for the way he's arrogantly speaking to him as if it's his fault. Like, what is wrong with you? Did Rasulullah(SAW) tell you to behave this way because you are an old "scholar" now?
You will never ever understand the pain until it happens to you. Be humble.
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who:
- Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.)
- Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship.
- Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past.
- When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past.
- It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not.
Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
True that. Sh. Assim was extremely rude to the man for no reason whatsoever.
True. Amazing arrogance from Sheikh for such an important question. Attacking the person who is asking a question is a sign of weak knowledge and arrogance
Brother sheikh was only trying to show him multiple prospectives to make him take a decision with clarity but one thing sheikh said that i was personally interested in was that Allah is the most merciful and he forgives so we should too but taking the weakness of humans which Quran says explicitlyو خلقل انسان ضعيف we have created the human being weak we dont have infinite resources or the capacity to look over the grave sin that our partner has committed against themselves and they lied about it and after being exposed it’s something no one wants
Scholar???? 😂😂😂 Asim ul Hakim ??? Funny
It seems like the people in this comment section are the most purest and sinless of people on this planet. the brother asked the sheikh and the sheikh give his advice he did not make a decision for the brother. the brother is free to make his own decision.
fear Allah your Rabb brothers and sisters, if you want to suggest to the brother to divorce her ok do it, but you do not have the right to defame a muslimah that you do not even know. I am especially astonished by some of the sisters here aren't we scared for ourselves, don't we have the same nafs and shaytan that made her fall into it which can make us fall into it as well. may Allah protect us.
every son of Adam is a sinner and just look into your own heart for a moment just because your sins were covered by Allah because you repented and its been a while so you just forgot about it doesn't mean that someone else who did other sins and repented that now you look down upon them.
seek refuge in Allah from being in such a state and ask Allah to forgive the sister and guide her and give the brother sabr and and heal his heart and replace his calamity and loss with something better ameen ya Rabb
NOTE. NOT TALKING ABOUT EVERY COMMENT
Sub'han Allah wa bi'hamdihee. Jazakumullaahu khayraan for saying the truth. Alhamdulillah finally someone pointed this out. Majority people have seem to forgotten this verse:
So do not claim yourselves to be pure; He is most knowing of who fears Him (53:32).
It was extremely painful to see lack of manners, knowledge, empathy and humility in the comments section. We all are sinners, yet some of our Brothers, for whom Allah has made it easier to remain chaste, have become so proud and arrogant that instead of following Islam, they have started to follow Iblees. They are so after breaking this marriage and demeaning the caller's wife without considering any other perspective. I mention again: Virginity is not the key to a happy and successful marriage, but honesty is.
I do sympathize with the caller's situation here, and am not supporting his wife or promoting promiscuity, but we need to prioritize Deen above everything else in our spouse. His wife could have easily hidden this fact from him during the conversation and he would have been fooled all his life, but she chose to be honest with him. Most importantly, it is his call whether he wants to stay in this marriage or not because none of us have lived with his wife under the same roof but he has, so only he knows about his wife's all other perspectives way better than all of us. We only pray to Allah that He guides the caller's heart and mind to take the right decision considering all perspectives possible.
Brothers in Islam, please strive to gain better knowledge and reflect upon Quran and Sunnah deeply. We are in the End of times when ignorance will prevail and you all sadly are attesting to it. The Judgement Day is near more than ever, so Fear Allah. May Allah SWT forgive and guide us all.
@@fahimahossain7482 lol 😂. Do you know the punishment of zina in Islam?
@@AAA-jq1tf Alhamdulillah I do. But do you know the punishment for slandering? No worries, I'll share it here:
Narrated by Abu Huraira RA:
Prophet Muhammad SAW asked, "Do you know who is the bankrupt?" The companions said: "The bankrupt among us is one who has neither money with him nor any property". He (SAW) said, "The real bankrupt of my Ummah would be he who would come on the Day of Resurrection with Salat, Saum and Sadaqah (charity), (but he will find himself bankrupt on that day as he will have exhausted the good deeds) because he reviled others, brought calumny against others, unlawfully devoured the wealth of others, shed the blood of others and beat others; so his good deeds would be credited to the account of those (who suffered at his hand). If his good deeds fall short to clear the account, their sins would be entered in his account and he would be thrown in the (Hell) Fire". (Sahih Muslim 2581)
she literally lied to him, he stipulated it as a condition
Not purest but pure enough to not commit Zinnah
it is not about forgiving or accepting, just thinking about someone who you previously thought was pure and good and now you know she already slept with multiple men is disgusting. even if you forgive. you can never get away from the disgust and can never see her the same way as you have seen in the part. it will be a slow and painful marriage towards divorce. You can never feel of see her in the same light as before.
It sounds to me like Sheikh is saying that it permissible to lie about your virginity status to the one seeking your hand in marriage, if you have repented from it.
While upholding the scholarly consensus to not disclose a sin Allah has kept hidden, you deceive your spouse to be whose major reason for marrying you is his/her conviction of your chastity.
May Allah guide us to the truth!
no do not lie, just do not expose
Yeh very contradictory, if it was known that he was expecting a virgin the fact she lied on such a level is enough or a divorce ASAP.
No one has to say they committed zina, they just have to say I don't meet your criteria so this won't go further. But when someone lies and their lie gets exposed, they got themselves to blame.
Keeping your sins a secret is one thing. And lying about sins is a different thing. Many people who committed ZINA twist the words to hide their past.
These are fruits of absence of Islamic Theocracy.
No Shari'ah, no order.
No Shari'ah, no consequence for the sin.
In a khilafah, its almost impossible for zina to take place, and if done the punishment is done in public. The entire neighborhood knows and can help out the potential to know of their past. As this saves the doomed consequences of such marriages.
I feel sympathetic to the brother, may Allah make it easy for him and grant him a pure spouse, Ameen.
unrealistic
@@Fadi5000 hard reality. It's Truth.
@@Fadi5000are you non muslim or are muslim and someone who commited zina?
@@Fadi5000are you going against sharia
I'm very disappointed from his answer
Brother was betrayed badly
The only option is that he should divorce her because it is clear that he don't want her anymore so there is no point of staying together
May Allah forgive her and brother should go for second marriage
This random Sheikh is Not any scholar...just a random guy opened YT channel... don't know why people listen to him??
Any Muslim can get knowledge from Quran and Authentic Hadiths. Only thing is he needs to give time for that and understand all details carefully.
@tanweeralam1650 Don't go overboard! Yeah this answer wasn't nice but he is knowledgeable and I have learned alot about shariah and sunnah from him
he should demand full refund, including his wasted time he spent with her unbearable mother.
So if a man had a history of brutal domestic violence on two ex wives and served time in prison, but repented and wanted to get married again the new wife shouldn’t know about that, please give me a break
exactly what a stupid answer
That’s not a sin, that’s a brutality, aggressive men and women have a psychological issue that needs to be solved, and they can literally destroy your life if untreated, this example is not comparable, a banana and an apple are fruits, but they are not the same 😅
What would she do if she gets to know? Be more careful and treat him like an ex convict.
Violence is obviously a danger to people. Having a past like most of you men have isnt lol. What a stupid thing to say.
And what of the story of the man who killed 99? Is he better or worse than your hypothetical ex-convict?
May Allah forgive both of you, and make the two of you among the people of paradise
Ameen
Ameen
Both of u 😂😂😂 wtf
Shiekh described the type of woman thats forgiven by Allah. Then shiekh applies it to the callers situation and ends it with "its your call akhi". He did his job perfectly here.
Alhamdulillah these types of cases are very less.
😂 Because most men would not accept this.
Because of gheerah
@@MR.FlyingMonkey Even women won't accept it, jealousy is natural but we must make wise decisions and not let our emotions control us
@@kimothefungenuis as far as I know this isn't case of just jealousy.
This is much more than just jealousy
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who:
- Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.)
- Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship.
- Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past.
- When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past.
Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
😂 perfectly, he gave the liar a pass, and left the guy hanging. Shame on him.
what a loophole
you can do all the sin before marriage according to him
if you're planning to sin with the intent of asking for forgiveness in the future then that won't work
it only works if you are sincerely repenting and are ACTUALLY sorry
@@gtxg.Every zina by a born Muslim is done with full understanding that it's a sin, and with a feeling that they'll repent later. Read that again. Now if someone really hated what they've done and stopped after a few slips Allah may forgive but the man still has the right to not marry zani women as per surah an Noor.
zina is usually done on an impulse tho it isn't with the intention that oh I'll do it and seek forgiveness after
@@gtxg.
Planning to meet up with someone and undress in front of them is done on impulse? Lmao.
@@dzvw yeah like next day after something big happening in your life or you just meet up with a non Muslim male and idk
Salam Alaykum brothers and sisters. After reading so many comments, i have to come out and say something. Do not suggest divorce to anyone as it is makruh and so therefore your opinion on his issue is pointless. Just as the Sheikh has said, the decision going forward would be up to the husband and the sheikh put the husband in the perspectives of repenting muslims and what Islam has to say and how Allah has made Islam a true religion of peace. As muslims, we should keep seeking for knowledge and not suggesting what's not to be uttered.
May Almighty Allah guide us...
Walaikum salam,i don't know why people suggest divorce,maybe the lady has repent and if Allah subhana WattalaAllah forgive her sin why cant we?This would be much worse if she did zina when they was married.But this happened in the past and i dont think its a reason for divorce.
@@xeno6578 So if she finds out her husband r****ed women in the past but repented, then who is she to not forgive his sins? Shirk is worse than this and Allah forgives shirk if one sincerely repents, right?
@@yasmas8194Allah swt forgives sins that are between Allah and the person repenting. Allah swt does not forgive wrong that has been done to someone else unless that person forgives too. So r*pe and consensual relationship are two different things and I doubt anyone would ever forgive their r*pist
@@xeno6578 she lied about it and entered the marriage when it was a CONDITION of the marriage contract. not only that, but she exposed her own sin
Makruh? Sure,but I did it for the best of the brother. He is a good man. A woman to have shady past and easily enter marriage, why does he need to gamble on his life? Please know that promiscuous women are very dangerous. I have watched podcast where the mother not only neglect her children financially and not even cook for them, she badmouthed and accused the father and even want to invite her eldest daughter to have fornication along with her with some random man. And she brought in some random men into her house multiple times. What is the chance that some of the kids won't be tricked by some perverts aka her partners? Oh I know the answer, only God protect them if it didn't happen even once. Most cases they should have been done for. I once believed people can change, but now I rather believe people can't change because the gamble is too much to lose for everyone related except the woman.
So basically it’s okay to lie and be deceptive. Got it
He didn’t say lie he said shut up. Damn even a sheikh who talks so slowly you’ve put words in his mouth.
@@soulio1994thank you,
How can someone lie about something like that in a marriage arrangement, especially since he made it a precondition, so crushing🤯🤯🤯
He has every single right to divorce her. And believe it or not, she is sinful for deceiving him
The problem is she lied and how can he trust her . I understand the imam trying the best not end , but if the guy wanted that from beginning and he has stated that he wants virgin he has right to divorce her .I know one story that the girl lied and the guy divorced her , her cousin told her why u lying tell the truth be free and strong if he wants ok if not move one someone else would marry you as you are and there is no problem with it , but at the end of the day she has been honest and not being afraid about this matter
Bro got scammed for his mahr 😅
@@olegnurmagomedov750facts akhi, may Allah make it easy for you and me, and the rest of us.
If he divorced his wife,,,,then he can take mahar,and gifts back,,,its written Quran (4:19)
U can't take back that u had given to your which until and unless u get know that wife is doing immoralities,,,,
@@muzzammilkamran5948 akh the women these days are so rebellious, you probably aint gonna get your mahr back. Theres a reason why women are the majority of the people of hellfire
Yep. He paid the mehr for her. Other guys paid nothing and got her😂. This is stupidity
😅😅
brothers just remember, pre marital relationships increase chances of divorce so be careful before you decide to be so forgiving to such a woman who had boyfriends prior.
I know a sister who had a crazy past, married a righteous brother, now has kids with him, she homeschools, wears niqab, the most traditional, humble wife out there, her family love her and it's only bc she's been concealed by Allah. This is not the only example, there are many like this. Many righteous married women are walking around today like this. I never understood the importance of concealing sins until I realised that most men would never marry a woman with a past and so concealing these sins, after repenting, when a good righteous brother comes makes a lot of sense. There's so much wisdom in covering up sins bc Allah is the Most Merciful and we as the creation fall way short in that department. So it's a mercy from Allah that we conceal it from the people.
I'm not saying it's right or wrong bc there seems to be a lot of opinions regarding this issue depending on what scholars you listen to or not. So I'm not saying what is halal and haraam bc I'm not quality do that. But I'm just pointing out the reality that repentance/istighfar is so powerful, that blessings upon blessing fall onto you after it. I've seen what happens to Muslims after they become religious and turn their lives around, the blessings in their lives multiply.
@@FreeToThink0 well that your experience i have seen multiple divorces in.First how you know the sister had a past she told you that.please reply me and his husband not that is wife had a past or not?
@@MuhammadFaisal-np7tc I went to all all girl school, these girls I've studied with grew up with, some are my friends and neighbors. Some were wild wild girls. None of their husbands know anything to this day. When you repent and change your life, blessings come pouring into your life. Allah conceals whom He wills.
@@FreeToThink0 It is a great injustice to a man that he does not know that my wife is like this.Your friend told you such things.Don't you think that they are being cruel to their husbands
@@FreeToThink0 so they lied their husband.
With all due respect I cannot agree with the sheikh on this matter. If the brother is a virgin and his requirement for the sister he intends to marry is that she is a virgin there is NOTHING wrong with her being truthful in that matter because anything that begins in a lie will end in a lie and Allah azawajal knows best. So sisters and vice versa who believe that it is okay to lie to marry a brother/sister you like auzubillah it's is not do not start with fitnah.
I missed the part where brother said he asked about her virginity status BEFORE marriage.
@@olegnurmagomedov750 It being one of his requirements doesn't mean he asked obviously. The sheikh would likely would have a response more in favor of divorcing her if he stated that she lied about it cuz lying about premarital questions is a big no no.
this why sisters continue to go out there and sin because the scholors say everything will be okay
This wahabi ain't scholar. This guy is Christianizing islam by talking too much about repentance. Boys and girls can do whatever they want before marriage and then just ask for forgiveness from god. HALLELUJAH.
he never said that. in fact he said these people are kafirs if they truly believe in that
he already knew he was going to likely divorce her so that's why he said at the end its your call
This guy isn't wahabi. He is more sufi and western liberalism mixed stuff.
The real ulama are unknown to the common public
So the shaikh yapped for 5 minutes and in the last 2 seconds he said its up to you.
I feel so bad for bro. I wouldn't wish this for my worst enemy wallahi, he's a good man, and this is what he get?
same. i rlly hope he finds peace and remarries to someone else who meets all of what he desires in a woman 🙏🏼💔
I can't stand the fact that if my future wife had intercoursed before marriage,, wallahi i will resent her.. I can't cope with it,,divorce is the way.. I have big gheerah and can't accept that..
This shaykh is openly promoting to Sexual Relation before marriage.I would respectfully tell him to earn some more knowledge from Hadith and Quran.I am a Muslim, Alhamdulillah. But shaykh Abdul Malik told that if a girl who had sex before marriage, she is not permissible to marry a virgin Boy.If he finds out that she is not virgin,then he can give her divorce and demand the Mahr.
Thanks to all
The sheikh said in islam a virgin is someone who wasn’t previously married not whether they had had sexual relationships.
In that context would a prostitute who was never married be considered a virgin according to this sheikh
Good question
Very confusing indeed
😂😂😂
So as per this Sheikh marrying a divorced woman who gave her virginity in a halal way is a problem, but marrying a prostitute who slept with a lot of men but still unmarried is not a problem and still she is a virgin 😂😂😂.
He is jaahil
Even so, the wisdom of the Sheikh’s answer is better even if it’s not generally accepted. This life isn’t about having everything you want to live a ‘happy’ life. It’s about finding a partner that will make your life easier so that you can both live righteously until the end of our test in this world.
Word. I can tell you're smart, masallah
While the answer he gave make sense generally, ultimately she lies and deceived him, no matter how much she becomes a holy and pious person, the mirages started with a lie and a big one at that, in my opinion marriages like this won’t last, it will keep coming back to the same point!
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who:
- Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.)
- Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship.
- Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past.
- When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past.
- It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not.
Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
Are you nuts?! It's easy for the shiekh to say because he isn't in his shoe but imagine marrying a woman thinking she was pure like you only to find out she was ran through and after having fun settled for the poor guy
I am sure you will be very happy and at ease if the same thing happened to you. Try to put yourself in someone else’s shoes then speak
Divorce her. She's been used. Also should find out these things especially in western countries before marriage
Young Muslim men should make sure to never marry Muslim women who:
- Have had any kind of a relationship by the time you sent her marriage proposal (a love affair on social media / call / text also counts as a relationship.)
- Has been involved in any kind of physical relationship.
- Refuses to answer your question about her chastity and her past.
- When you ask her about the details during marriage proposal stage, she tells you that you can't judge her for her past.
- It does not matter if she says that she has repented or not.
Muslim men, be careful. It is better to marry a blind Muslimah who is a untouched and pure like you, than to marry a non-virgin Muslim woman.
Good luck finding out
@@nevergiveup9937 Y'all are weird for defending people like this.
@@zainsdifferent5014It’s not a defense, it’s the truth. There are many tactics people use to hide their pasts. I’ve seen both men and women do so successfully.
@@zainsdifferent5014
Evil people will defend evil. Nothing surprising.
People would rather be simps then to follow the wisdom of Allah that A VIRGIN SHOULD ONLY MARRY A VIRGIN- A NON VIRGIN IN TERMS OF MARRIAGE IS ON THE LEVEL OF A MUSHRIK - Those that Allah has protected the chastity of should marry only themselves.
And on top of this this is in an age where it is mainly women who are choosing to be nonvirgins, at this point they have lost the right to marry a righteous man.
This young guy asks if it's "sinful" to leave her when he's the one who was deceived. All These young guys have been so used to having their rights trampled on as men, this generation is so weak...
@@ISkandarashhow was he deceived
Says whov
How do we understand if a man Is Virgin ? Can we ask ?
@@z.a.1237 You can't ask directly, but look up the dealbreaker list method and that will do the job for you just fine.
You will never find happiness with her before you have children leave her inshalah look for pious woman that tells me she does not care even to learn basics of life islam how can she be a good mother for your children?
Definitely divorce that women, who on earth want to pass his marriage life with FAKE happiness inside his/her heart?
When you're not mentally happy, don't try to force yourself to get fit inside.
That girl had multiple partners before marriage means, it has pretty high chance that her previous boyfriends dumped her. Due to not finding any other option she ended up getting married. Girls/Boys who already had multiple partners before is not suitable for marriage life, it's bitter truth.
That's not true. U can still be suitable for marriage even if your a playboy
How can even go so fast to judge. Like hear both stories first
@@omglol9571 Not works for most of us, we human are emotional creatures. When you're clean yourself, it's almost impossible to actually balance the entire marriage life with someone who's totally opposite of you.
That brother already explained that what he's and about her wife. Judging his situation it's definitely a big NO. Hoping Allah will give him better life partner in this duniya or in jannah.
@@oostaad ok
If she had sex shes not a Virgin. Not based on marriage. Lets not try to cover it up. If a woman Lies about her past sexual encounters she Will not become a wise mother.
yes don't expect from her wonders in bringing up your daughters in good way. she can teach the tricks to them too.
Mia khalifa is a virgin she is not married.
I understand both perspectives, the sheikhs advice and the married guy. It was the young man's condition to marry a virgin. That's a big test for the man May Allah help him amin. I would listen to the sheikh and look if the girl is loving the deen and practising correctly. If so, stay with her and Allah is the best rewarder for your tolerance and sabr.
sheik only giving this answer bcze he know that the correct thing to do is divorce ; but hes in tv so he need give a last chance to the couple ; divorce shouldnt be fast . In pvt consultation he would say to him divorce her without wasting time
@@mhm2689 brother you cannot say "if he wasn't on TV, he would say something else". Stop following your desires.
@@shadowscape00 clearly u dont know anything about communication ; public communication and private communication are not the same lmao . Go to school and stop talking if u dont understand a comment .
@@shadowscape00 unfortunately he's right. Most of these online famous "sheikhs" and/or "scholars" are PR trained, so they answer like politicians. All twisted and nothing straightforward when it comes to sensitive matters like these, which makes it Even worse. At most, the explanations and options should've taken maximum 1 minute. All this extra reverse interrogation and pandering is unnecessary and actually more harmful than good. Answers like these reach young Muslim teens, and it teaches them to bend over and not stand firm in belief and punishment for anything.
May Allah give all of us multiple pure virgins in Jannah.😪😪😪😪🙏
😅😅😅ameen
I am a virgin and that too by choice and with tremendous self-control, also with the sole purpose of saving myself for the one who I marry. I will die alone but will never be ok with marrying a non-virgin. I have lived all my all life rejecting all temptations and stayed away from all non-mahram women coz I did not plan to Marry them and even if I did, I would only touch them once I married them. Why the hell would I be ok with a non-virgin
Same thoughts with me .
Just divorce her if u ain't content about her not being virgin before marriage.
@@olegnurmagomedov750 i can't say for certain but i think the brither asked before marriage if she's still a virgin. If it didn't bother him this much he wouldn't have bothered contacting the sheikh to ask him
Yeah. Why lie when you are going to reveal your sins anyway?@@olegnurmagomedov750
She lied. They need to divorce
@@cyberspace7208 if she did then he should divorce her anyway
@@cyberspace7208 can you post the time where he said she lied? i watched 3 times and i cant seem to find it
Not about forgiving and accepting. Just thinking about how your wife have slept with multiple or even 1 men is disgusting. even if you forgive, you will never see her the same way.
This is absolutely disgusting, and this girl belongs to the streets. I understand his pain very much. For us men, it is something that is very important to us. I would IMMEDIATELY divorce her if I heard that about her 😡😡😡
This says much about you ☝️
@@Natisha-z3s it says that he does not want to marry someone dishonest.
why, would you like to be thrown out for your sins? are you clean yourself?
@@flashpoint1338nobody is a 100% pure but this woman destroyed this poor guy's life and it I were him i would despise every single women till the day I die because of her lies
Please also counsel your brothers against zina; you should see what us Muslim women have to deal with when finding a spouse. A lot of wayward and promiscuous men unfortunately
A man or a woman has the right to know who their prospective spouse is or was. If someone is not ok with your past then he/she is not the right one for you. Why make it complicated. If you have repented then tell him/her about your past.
The hadith about concealing sins is not about confessing in private but rather bragging about it. Which is definitely a sin. But telling your finance in private would be a sin.
I don't think women care about virginity or anything islamic cuz of what I have observed it's all about how rich the man is
I say this with my heart, it is very hard for brothers and sisters in the west to find their spouses because growing in a westren country you begin to learn their culture since childhood this is why nowadays is impossible to find someone who is truthful and has a strong iman may allah help us all inshallah amin.
Tell her she can stay on the condition that she accepts that you will have more than one wife. Then marry someone younger, more beautiful, and a virgin. Treat them equally of course. She is with you because she feels you are safe, she does not truly desire you.
Thisss
Good advice 🙌🙌
The woman was not innocent and betrayed an innocent young practicing man …
She has committed a great sin
Like my ex, she asked my religion, I said Islam and practiced, she told me after divorcing her ex husband, she had affairs with 3 men and she spoke to me she had privacy with them, I said okey, but one day during conversation she said that one of them was Christian. By the way she is Turkish and Muslim, she claims herself Muslim.
The moment I learnt that , relations was over.
Not accepted.
She lied at first sight, and I caught her.
I can not accept a lady with this specific past.
Straight 0 point to her character.
YOUR EX? What was your rship?
Not easy for you as she deceived you, and this was important to you.
I have been married for 21 years , and have 3 beautiful children . My wife was not a virgin when we married,. However in the big picture , it doesn't really matter , it is about what happens afterwards . If she is a faithful, loyal, loving, wife , you can not ask for more . This is the most important virtue.
At the end of the day this is about your ability to forgive .
If you love her , forgive her and enjoy life , move on and never mention it again .
Easier said then done i know .
However there is real growth in adversity . You can actually grow stronger together .
To forgive is to make love sacred .
Well i am virgin so i also want my wife is virgin.
You are a gem
were you virgin? did you knew before marriage or came to know after?
This sheik is more concerned about minor sins but lineat about zina
With due respect Sheikh completed ignored the following aspects:
1. The mental baggage one carries after having multiple relationship with men before marriage.
2. The fact that she decieved this brother into marriage by lying.
3. Openly admitting the sin even after Allah gave her a chance for a good life.
4. This shows her level of repentance when she herself conceals her past without even asked about it.
5. His main question went unanswered that "whether he is sinful for divorcing her?"
Instead i can see Shaikh was looking for a chance to bash this guy and blame shift if the brother said he asked the women about her past.
A man was practicing, holding on to the Deen of Allah,search for a pious spouse as order by Allah, fulfilling all the checklist set by the women and her family, pays mahr. But what he gets in return is a fornicator who lied to marry him, a Sheikh who ignores his main question and keen to know about what wrong that man would've done and advices him to settle for less.
This sheikh is Missing the point that If he wanted a virgin as wife, and if he told her explicitly that he would marry her on condition that she was a virgin, and the woman went ahead with the marriage, that is the straight lie and deceit. The guy has every right to leave the woman.
Dear brother, you will never ever b able to lead a peaceful married life with her. Whenever you look at her or when you engage in physical relations with her, you certainly will visualize her with other men. Human minds are naturally like this. Best solution is to pray sincerely to Allah and do Istekhara. Allah knows best, so put your trust in HIM, and once you do the ISTEKHARA, remember to accept HIS answer whatever that might be. This way you not only get saved from taking a wrong decision and committing a sin but also can be relieved of the worry and guilt if you had to divorce / keep her.
I faced a similar situation. I had got intimate photos from my newly wed wife's ex. It was life's worst time.
I had taken decision to accept her. Went her house to bring her, instead I was insulted by her family. She was saying whatever she had done was before marriage and she was not wrong in anyway. Then the stopped all kind of contact with me. She neither wanted to come back not wanted a divorce just she was spreading rumours and lies about me. I did not understand why they were doing like that. Then they came with a demand of some money and said they needs divorce in return of the money.
Where are you from.
I understand the Sheikh's approach as he wants to keep the chastity of this woman and preserve her marriage.
But he still could've said that It is not sinful for this young man to divorce her, He surely deserves better.
Dear Sheikh I don't agree with you and I will end comment with this Quran quote:Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure, and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honorable.Quran An-Nur Ayah 26
You're wrong to argue with sheikh..sheikh knows better than you
Assalam wa alaikum brother. I m not Sheikh but I want to give my opinion on this matter.
The ayat quoted by u is the same Ayat which I chanced upon when I was roughly in class 8,...... And this single ayat helped me to avoid zina throughout my unmarried life. I knew that if I lost my virginity I would get a similar woman as my life partner.....which I obviously did not want to end up with. Today I m 43 and when I look back I am thankful to Allah that I happened to come across this ayat and got guided by Allah and thus avoided zina which is actually very common in my city Kolkata, India.
But I want to tell u that if a person has repented then he or she is not longer a zina Kari or mushrik ...so this ayat no longer applies to him or her.
The sheikh is not God. @@born_to_die1041
@@syediqbalasif8946 What you said about repentance is true, but we all have our own attitudes and ways of thinking individually. My theory is that if men can get over it, then it's fine for them, again we have to know that there are men who don't get over those things and want to a pure person, as they have been all their lives. I'm glad you shared your story with us here, but Allah knows best!
As some of you already mentioned. Forgiveness is one thing, but a future based on lies is like a house of cards. On the other hand, every person is different, but for this young man specifically, it remains a difficult one.
I am so surprised and shocked to hear the answer of sheikh . such a such a modern thinking sheikh.
it's not modern thinking it's the right thinking. It's easy for us to judge, especially as men, it's really hard for us to accept something like that but anyone can come back to the right path.
@@ay3237 yeah you are right
@@ay3237 you have such a intellectual thinking. may I please know where are you from Yusesef?
@@ay3237if you like ran through women then that's you but for a Muslim man with gheerah it's totally unacceptable
Not surprised to see divorce rate in Saudi Arabia increasing day by day(Assim Al Hakim is from Saudi Arabia)
I disagree with the sheikh on this..
If she hides her past mistakes and deceives her husband, her husband is NOT obligated to forgive her.
If i as a Muslim man wanted to forgive my spouse, i'd much rather marry a muslim revert who was a prostitute or a stripper since at least that way, there will be transparency.
yea we know for kaffir woman you would them back and you wouldn’t question or dare to question her but from a woman, you are lions
What a stupid comment
So you disagree with islam?? Hiding your past sins is MANDATORY. Exposing your past sins is HARAM. Did you even watch the video???
In the end of day it's the mans call. If he can be merciful to her ... Meaning if she is a good girl now. . not a HoeJabi. Then maybe it's best he reconsidering keeping her if she promise never to be involved with other men. Etc.
@@Neptune_171 bro no way ur beiung serious, eys hide ur sins but if someone made. a checklist for what they wanted, and u prwetended to fill that checklist that is lying and deciet.
I fear the same thing for myself, may Allah make it easy for us all to get married
Allahuma aameein also I fear about that may Allah protect us to zinaa
The only way is to wait for pure hoors who are virgins and were told so by Allah himself
He totally missed the point. 🤦🏽♂️👎🏾
@@sage6321 You can’t speak for what Allah has or hasn’t placed in someone’s heart. Check your ‘aqidah.
Dont listen to this man, Wallahi if she lied about being virgin you should not be with her. Forgiveness is for The ignorant who did wrong not thoose with knowledge who think they can do evil and get away with it. Follow your hearts voice, honor is islam.
@@sage6321Whom you are deceiving and why ? Both the partners know what they are talking about . And if you were to take in literal sense then virginity itself a English word . And the word you are talking about is Divorcee.And in Arabic non-virgin (consensual sex , not rape etc) is used in Quran as ZANI .Which has punishment of 100 lashes .
@@sage6321 Well I don't which community are you from . But as far I know people ask about it . Not instantly but eventually yes , it is important for them . And I agree you are not allowed expose your sin . But you know we can tell our deal breaker list and expect the other person to go forward if they are okay as what what we expect them to be . Then its fine otherwise don't marry us , I am not forcing you tell each story of your life and expose your sin and just don't marry . Its not that hard for somebody who genuinely doesnt want to keep her partner in disguise. its just preference , But they will not because after whoring a lot in their prime these people want a nice settled guy who accept them . Sorry we are to born to take care this of people. We have our own life and preference if its not against the rule of Islam . And it is not . And also why these want to settle with so desperately who doesn't even want them in their real personality. 🤔
@@sage6321 You are confused, there is a thing called a pure person (virgin), chaste, in islam. There can be no opinions in this, this guy clearly asked his soon to be wife if she has been chaste and she affirmed. He was lied to and can divorce her, its about his honor as a muslim. Zina is a major haram and a filthy deed, and a muslim man can ask about this for his heart and honor to be in peace and to make sure she is the right one for him. In a islamic court she would be lashed for her sins. Allah is most Forgiving. My brothers honor was offended and my heart forced me to write.
So if she was a sex worker, took many drugs and ran through the whole neighbourhood, but repented, Sheikh is saying he wouldn't care??? Ridiculous statement. I bet if his son wanted a girl like this, he would care.
He don’t have sons only daughters-
Sadly when it come marriage thy alway find the nice guy to fool. When other men with experience know she is play them. She pick him because he was her last option and there will always be fool that will be played. She mostly had anthoer person ready if he said no. 😢 I myself was played like this is way I am very careful know. I hope he doesn't have children if not run fast
Please repent to Allah about what you said. The woman is among the tawwabin now. She might have a higher status than all of us here in the comment section. And you here are talking in such a manner about someone whom Allah loves. This thing shows kibr. I understand now why Allah told us to conceal our sins. It's because human beings can be very shallow. And judge you by your past. They will forget who you are in the present, what you have done for them and will jump right back to judge you as if they are angels and not humans themselves. Brother, she told him herself and that needs a whole lot of courage and that shows how much she values honesty. She didn't "cheat" on him, since all of that was before marriage. She values his trust and told him . Plus, if she did other sins, aren't all the other people committing an even bigger sin by having arrogance in their hearts? And having arrogance even the size of a mustard seed will not let you enter Paradise. It's a hadith. Whether the man forgives her or not and divorces her or not is up to him. But we human beings have no right to judge someone's Eman especially in the present. And one more hadith brother, this is a very important one:
Sahih Muslim 2643 a
Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) reported that Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) who is the most truthful (of the human beings) and his being truthful (is a fact) said:
"Verily your creation is on this wise. The constituents of one of you are collected for forty days in his mother's womb in the form of blood, after which it becomes a clot of blood in another period of forty days. Then it becomes a lump of flesh and forty days later Allah sends His angel to it with instructions concerning four things, so the angel writes down his livelihood, his death, his deeds, his fortune and misfortune. By Him, besides Whom there is no god, that one amongst you acts like the people deserving Paradise until between him and Paradise there remains but the distance of a cubit, when suddenly the writing of destiny overcomes him and he begins to act like the denizens of Hell and thus enters Hell, and another one acts in the way of the denizens of Hell, until there remains between him and Hell a distance of a cubit that the writing of destiny overcomes him and then he begins to act like the people of Paradise and enters Paradise."
This hadith should humble us because it is tell us of a very scary scenario that can befalls us anytime if we don't ask Allah for guidance. It is Allah, by Who's Permission and Will, we do good. Then who are we to judge that sister? She might have stronger Eman than all of us. May Allah guide us and make it such that we never anger Him by hurting the people He loves and His Creation. Ameen.
True actually
@@lucydragneel7212 your paragraph is on assumptions thats it.Please living in your disney world
@@MuhammadFaisal-np7tcplease get out of your silly zone
@@purplelove3666 you get out f nerd
The man is clearly hurt and immediately gets interrogated. I think its important to remember that just because it's a woman doesn't mean she's innocent. It's easy to say you won't worry when you're not in the position as this person. I too would be extremely hurt with my partner, that's just a fact of life.
A lot of men are abusers and pretend to be victims for favour of their communities