After Love | Faith and Fear | S2 E4 | The Black Love Doc After Show

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  • Опубликовано: 7 фев 2025
  • In this episode of #BLAfterLove, the official aftershow of Black Love on OWN, the series co-creator and director Codie Elaine Oliver chats with couple Keith and Dretona on the principles of forgiveness when it comes to marriage. Both Dretona and Keith share how they could forgive and begin to trust one another early on in their marriage and how that has led to a 20 plus year commitment to one another.
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Комментарии • 119

  • @pollywanja
    @pollywanja 3 года назад +6

    There's something about Codie that invites people to talk to her with no inhibitions. You are doing a great job.

  • @cemplygloria6261
    @cemplygloria6261 3 года назад +50

    I love their story. No matter how your life is growing up, GOD ALWAYS make it work out for your GOOD! Not that what happened (happens) is good, but it works for your GOOD. I am a firm believer in that. GOD bless them for the work their doing to help young people.

  • @HelloMsSongbird
    @HelloMsSongbird 3 года назад +76

    The fact that the pastor actually held the husband accountable is surprising, but I’m glad this couple made it through it.

    • @brokgrl85
      @brokgrl85 3 года назад +8

      Yes! That's what today's churches are missing ... Accountability. Yes, there is forgiveness and Grace but less not forget accountability is just as important to the restoration journey. I hear him saying he wouldn't do the same thing to someone else, but clearly it worked. There are consequences to one's actions, and the pulpit is a sacred place: you have to have high reverence and honor that role and the people it serves because people - particularly those who do not know Christ - are watching, and it's sometimes the closest encounter to Christ they will ever get. That's why many people have walked away from God & faith - Church hurt & fakeness of "forgiveness" with no accountability to leaders. Paul even spoke on this... Folks just worry about their own image & ego versus protecting God's.
      I don't agree in dogging people (aka doing a sermon on them, making them confess to everyone, etc) when they are already down. Accountability teaches you humility. One of the biggest roots to fall from grace or mistakes is pride & ego.

    • @natinamack5123
      @natinamack5123 3 года назад +3

      There are only a handful of them too! Thank God for the pastors out there who really do hold their congression to the standards that are built on the word of God. Checkmate ✅

    • @rodbyrd5555
      @rodbyrd5555 3 года назад +1

      that's bull crap! there's nowhere in scripture to support any pastor "silencing" someone.

    • @natinamack5123
      @natinamack5123 3 года назад +2

      Silencing or holding somebody accountable? 🤷🏽‍♀️

  • @elizabethbillingsley5534
    @elizabethbillingsley5534 3 года назад +21

    Her not being present is no excuse for his behavior. He took responsibility for his behavior which is awesome. I like how she was honest about the process.

    • @byBrieMoore
      @byBrieMoore 3 года назад +7

      Certainly, there is no excuse, and I don't think in admitting her role in their relationship at the time, she was excusing what he did. When there is a breakdown in a relationship, typically there are things both sides could be doing better, before it gets to the potential point of no return. By acknowledging where she fell short, before he made his decision to do what he did, it can prevent the same sort of breakdown in the future. She can now be more aware when she is not present, and actively do something about it. Beautiful couple, with really beautiful communication.

  • @ashantee5200
    @ashantee5200 3 года назад +42

    Y’all have done numerous of great episodes but this episode, Jesus!!! It was touching and set right at home with me!!! ❤️ Amazing content!

  • @saritamoorebansa4485
    @saritamoorebansa4485 3 года назад +9

    Can identify totally with this couple. My husband and I went through something similar. We even separated for a couple of weeks. Letting our families get in our marriage. I finally grew up and stop telling my mom everything little thing. My husband has to tell his mother and sister not to question me regarding stuff that happened between us. We got over the hump and now married for 23 years and counting…

  • @elizabethbillingsley5534
    @elizabethbillingsley5534 3 года назад +21

    What a great interview and a great couple. They listened to Jesus!

  • @keevawashington2508
    @keevawashington2508 3 года назад +20

    As I’m sitting here listening to them share their story, I have tears of joy an humbleness, blessings to them an their connection, which gives me positive hope as I journey with my honey

  • @missvalisha
    @missvalisha 3 года назад +28

    What a testimony. May God continue to bless their union and the service they are giving to our communities. 🙏🏾💕

  • @newjerseylove1373
    @newjerseylove1373 3 года назад +16

    What a POWERFUL story of COMMITMENT to GOD!!!

  • @nomvulankoro2109
    @nomvulankoro2109 3 года назад +6

    Thank you for saying that, I argued with my spiritual leader that embarrassing someone who already feels bad about what they did, is evil in itself. The church acts so offendedly assuming their reputation is more important than restoring such a one in the spirit of humility.

  • @relaxandreleasewithme
    @relaxandreleasewithme 3 года назад +15

    Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for using your platform to highlight God's glory through relationships. Bless you!

  • @tezzie6722
    @tezzie6722 3 года назад +21

    This couples experiences that they spoke of here are identical to my recent struggles in marriage. The way that they have affirmed me in my feelings, especially because I’ve felt alone in them is CRAZY!! Thank you so much!!

  • @Chappy-jt1cl
    @Chappy-jt1cl 3 года назад +22

    God bless them. Their story is so encouraging and they are two amazing people. Thank you to them for sharing their story of growth and for sharing their light with us

  • @ithabeleng83
    @ithabeleng83 3 года назад +4

    We need more people like them in this world. I am truly inspired. I always pray for marriage because I love L.O.V.E but this made me realize that marriage is part of Heavenly Father's plan for our divine purpose and it goes beyond just the feeling of being loved and a sense of security.

  • @IamMoniqueWhite
    @IamMoniqueWhite 3 года назад +10

    Talk making the bad in your life into good!! They are amazing! Out here doing the lord’s work frfr 🙌🏾

  • @keciaanderson6317
    @keciaanderson6317 3 года назад +4

    Wow! The Transparency was so organic. God bless this couple for the work they are doing.

  • @alisonassanah-carroll1957
    @alisonassanah-carroll1957 3 года назад +4

    Give that pastor an award for reinforcing accountability! I truly believe that also made a difference in the outcome of this marriage. This was an awesome interview!👍⚘

  • @chanelrenee1344
    @chanelrenee1344 3 года назад +4

    Beautiful couple. Their story is a true testament to love and faith.

  • @tamikawhitehurst6631
    @tamikawhitehurst6631 2 года назад

    The Black Love series gets better and better. Listening to this couples journey and life experiences absolutely prepared them to walk thru 29 years of marriage. Its no way you could not be blessed watching this. Thank you so much for sharing and please continue.

  • @britrobinson78
    @britrobinson78 3 года назад +5

    Who recommended this couple?!!! Give them a raise!!! Lol

  • @darrylwalkerjr.4169
    @darrylwalkerjr.4169 3 года назад +8

    🔥🔥🔥🔥 This couple is so powerful! God is using you guys! So inspiring!

  • @carolynricks3123
    @carolynricks3123 3 года назад +3

    This couple blessed my heart. Tears of joy flowed as I heard their story and recognized God’s power to heal, restore and enrich.

  • @Tibzx
    @Tibzx 3 года назад +4

    Wow. This marriage is true ministry. Beautiful. May God continue to bless y’all! 🙏🏾🙌🏾💕

  • @valeriefullilove1031
    @valeriefullilove1031 3 года назад +3

    This is an awesome testimony. What the devil meant for evil, God turned it around for good. May God continue to bless this family....and yours too Codie!

  • @trustlfspr0ces328
    @trustlfspr0ces328 3 года назад +7

    They are an impactful union on so many levels. ❤️

  • @arabakoleman1132
    @arabakoleman1132 3 года назад +1

    Their story brings to mind this song by Ashford &Simpson.
    "And for love's sake, each mistake aww, you forgave.
    Until both of us learned to trust, and not run away,.........
    We build it up, and build it up. And now it's solid, solid as a rock "
    I missed some words but it's a beautiful summary of a good marriage .

  • @Crystallatoya
    @Crystallatoya 2 года назад

    I almost didn't watch this video but God knew how it would bless my life. This couple is such an inspiration.

  • @Diasmonds
    @Diasmonds 3 года назад +5

    The accountability process they went through especially the young men, was a part of God's plan for their lives. The Spirit of God was in it whether it looked like or felt like it. It affected them so much that now they are highly regarded as men of godly integrity. The fruit is being witness through their children. Not saying there is not room for a few adjustment but just hearing the testimony gives glory to God! Be blessed!

  • @carolynbest870
    @carolynbest870 3 года назад +2

    I have watched so many episodes and this one here was perfectly amazing in content, the level of transparency and the LOVE. I'm just blown away. I could have listened to their story and insight all day because of the clear openness. If only I could have been there to have my own questions answered 😄❤

  • @Deeplyrooteddj
    @Deeplyrooteddj 3 года назад +2

    Praise God for his Pastor! There’s a lot of Christian members need to be sat down! It’s in the word and the restoring part definitely needed to be there in the Spirit of meekness. I’m glad they worked it out and thank God for Jesus and restoration.

  • @johnniecollins8127
    @johnniecollins8127 2 года назад

    Thanks for what you and your husband do! Because of this particular episode, I found the courage to initiate this "tough conversation". After three years of egg shell walking, we have experienced the healing and restoration of GOD. Thanks to this beautiful and transparent couple for sharing their story.

  • @JM-qg9bo
    @JM-qg9bo 3 года назад +4

    My new couple that I have clarity and a new found respect for. Their story is so emotional and moving.

  • @britrobinson78
    @britrobinson78 3 года назад +4

    Oh my goodness, this was so heart-warming. They have done amazing things for others with their life.

  • @theabsolutetruth4252
    @theabsolutetruth4252 3 года назад

    WHAT AN IMPACT.... and the greatest gift, they don't see it. WHAT A MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

  • @whoknew5940
    @whoknew5940 3 года назад

    Dag onnit! I held the tears back....until the end. Beautiful story to share.

  • @mel.alisha2992
    @mel.alisha2992 3 года назад +1

    Such a beautiful story and how the power of God flows through us!

  • @aishagreen5638
    @aishagreen5638 3 года назад +4

    Thank you for sharing your testimony. God bless you all!

  • @lillyroseflowers849
    @lillyroseflowers849 3 года назад +8

    Beautiful couple 😍
    Great story

  • @andrene_mck7704
    @andrene_mck7704 2 года назад

    Omg their story is absolutely amazing 👏 😍 I'm glad they were able to come back from that situation, she was so brave and strong to sit with him in church after that I can't imagine what people want saying, God bless you guys and many more years to come, thank you for sharing.

  • @carolynlong8701
    @carolynlong8701 3 года назад +8

    Once making a mistake doesn’t mean he can not be trusted 🤷🏾‍♀️🙏🏾just saying ❤️ continue to grow in Gods grace 😊

  • @lynnbrown3777
    @lynnbrown3777 3 года назад +16

    Very grounded and wise couple 💜

  • @sherrynelson365
    @sherrynelson365 3 года назад

    Yes transparency a true pillar of trust and marriage

  • @tracynunez3157
    @tracynunez3157 3 года назад +1

    What Beautiful souls I was an adopted orphan and have a desire to foster too adopt praying for direction🙏🏽

  • @HoneyWealthMix
    @HoneyWealthMix 3 года назад +3

    This is PROFOUND!!! Thanks for sharing.

  • @sandrabraziel8271
    @sandrabraziel8271 3 года назад +1

    So good to hear this Brother know that God is Love and a church taking steps to not show grace and allow him to express his love for God through his gifts because he made a mistake is not of God. Privately with counsel, yes, but not publicly as if one of them were without sin. However, God brought goodness from his pain. Powerful testimony so glad they pushed through. Wonderful testimony from both.

  • @vinashamenka617
    @vinashamenka617 3 года назад +2

    This story is so beautiful and inspiring!

  • @malyroberts9075
    @malyroberts9075 3 года назад

    Wow! What a testimony! Their commitment to each other and God are a blessing to others. She's not tired and that's how she knows there's more work to do. . . amazing.

  • @libralife1009
    @libralife1009 3 года назад

    This couple has been a blessing. Thank God you were willing to let God use you both. This story is going to help a lot of people. Continued blessings! ❤

  • @ronninathomas4589
    @ronninathomas4589 3 года назад

    Beautiful love story.... So thankful for their transparency.... Especially in the church world, thank you for helping me understand my process now.

  • @theabsolutetruth4252
    @theabsolutetruth4252 3 года назад

    LORD, her story.... JESUS what a heart. All that she went through, the heart still yearned to help others

  • @elizabethbillingsley5534
    @elizabethbillingsley5534 3 года назад +3

    He does make a good point about grace and restoration.

  • @walkbyfaith2917
    @walkbyfaith2917 2 года назад

    Whewww, I see God's hand all up in this...Pushes me more to be in Awe of God ..So Amazing!!!

  • @BetweenUs944
    @BetweenUs944 3 года назад

    Wow what a testimony. I praise God for this couple and #Black_Love. Thanks for sharing.

  • @lareemah9172
    @lareemah9172 3 года назад +1

    What a great interview!! I’m loving this content.

  • @mamasann7636
    @mamasann7636 3 года назад +3

    I hope we can see some couples that don’t break their marital vows and don’t have to go through trauma to be successful.

  • @andreanegron9613
    @andreanegron9613 2 года назад

    GOD🙌🙌 is really real. This episode brought me to tears a few times. Great work. Thank you

  • @chyannmayfield5613
    @chyannmayfield5613 3 года назад

    Such a beautiful couple and powerful, moving story. Real people! Love this so much. Commitment and the power of GOD! Thank you for sharing.

  • @nellan6930
    @nellan6930 3 года назад +2

    "When you telling the truth you don't have to remember what you said"

  • @Chinkeyeyez25
    @Chinkeyeyez25 3 года назад

    Thank you for your openness and honesty within your journey!!!

  • @linseeyjohnson4212
    @linseeyjohnson4212 3 года назад

    Their stories, This conversation, Black Love!

  • @moorer2906
    @moorer2906 3 года назад

    I want to thank you guys for telling this story it is truly inspiring to me and for me. It was much needed

  • @raej4884
    @raej4884 3 года назад

    Beautiful, beautiful story!! Thank you guys for sharing❤

  • @aw4460
    @aw4460 3 года назад +1

    These two are AMAZING!

  • @tineshamalachi3122
    @tineshamalachi3122 3 года назад

    God bless this couple and their family🙌❤🥰 My hat goes off to them!!!

  • @kenyatta2324
    @kenyatta2324 3 года назад

    Its key what she said. If there's an offense in a marriage, how the offender approaches the situation is the key to the survival of that relationship.

  • @deidreej
    @deidreej 3 года назад

    What an awesome couple! Glad they made it through the other side of through! 🙏🙏🙏

  • @moniquewatson6231
    @moniquewatson6231 3 года назад +1

    This makes me smile 😊

  • @shaedyk1671
    @shaedyk1671 3 года назад

    Such beautiful spirits! God bless them!

  • @kristenmcween5244
    @kristenmcween5244 3 года назад

    One of the best couples by far!!!❤

  • @goldenlabelstudio
    @goldenlabelstudio 3 года назад

    Awesome. Just awesome!#blacklove

  • @liveinviolet2908
    @liveinviolet2908 3 года назад +1

    This was so Beautiful and powerful testimony 🙏🏽 Thank you 🙏🏽

  • @estherstrategicadvisor749
    @estherstrategicadvisor749 3 года назад +7

    The wife said: "Some things can only be worked out in the backyard...Let us do rounds and then we're good!"🤣🤣🤣 No turning the other cheek?😁
    🔹Jokes aside, to GOD be the glory that the husband followed Biblical protocol & they were able to hold on to their marriage....
    *Edit: Plus they're helping others. The Church sat him down but forgot the Word ALSO says to "RESTORE quickly." It doesn't sound like they gave them Counseling back then. He said he would never treat someone who's made a mistake, like that. there are extremes of accountability or NO accountability. Sad.

  • @tamaratarere
    @tamaratarere 3 года назад

    My God ❤ marriage really has a purpose God bless these two and their home!

  • @zanelemzinyati6752
    @zanelemzinyati6752 3 года назад +1

    May God continue to bless them. ✨✨💕

  • @shescultivating
    @shescultivating 2 года назад

    This story incredible ❤ really touches my heart.

  • @Solmom03
    @Solmom03 3 года назад +2

    Talk about divinely ordered. AMAZING!!

  • @quinnelmonte9435
    @quinnelmonte9435 3 года назад

    Beautiful story 🖤🖤

  • @chrisybm4392
    @chrisybm4392 3 года назад

    Once trust is broken, it is hard to repair.

  • @carolynlong8701
    @carolynlong8701 3 года назад +1

    Love 💕 this couple continue to be bless

  • @theabsolutetruth4252
    @theabsolutetruth4252 3 года назад

    He has the voice of a preacher.... Glad to know he realized how it looks like in the mirror. I pray that we ALL have a heart to heart with ourselves before GOD so we can deal with our flaws and walk BETTER >>>.

  • @tamragoodson8678
    @tamragoodson8678 3 года назад

    So much about this speaks to me. 🙏🏽🖤

  • @dstpartyprincess21
    @dstpartyprincess21 3 года назад

    This was excellent!

  • @staceymiller3125
    @staceymiller3125 2 года назад

    Nice keep the good work up GOD is good

  • @woniwa
    @woniwa 3 года назад

    Incredibly beautiful 💜

  • @phelisangqokotya9543
    @phelisangqokotya9543 3 года назад

    Beautiful story😢😢😢😢😢

  • @laurenrichardson446
    @laurenrichardson446 3 года назад

    What a great couple ❤❤❤❤

  • @jesseycharles5441
    @jesseycharles5441 3 года назад

    The story is so touching! Can I get in touch with this couple ?

  • @anonnona6433
    @anonnona6433 3 года назад

    Wow 👏 😮 👏 😮 😇😇😇This is a life of purpose 🙆🏽‍♀️🙆🏽‍♀️🙆🏽‍♀️

  • @Eve_Y
    @Eve_Y 2 года назад

    I thought they were Codie’s parents from looking at the screen grab 🤦🏾‍♀️😂

  • @MsIcollins
    @MsIcollins 3 года назад +2

    Codie is gorgeous, beautiful from the inside out

  • @elizabethbillingsley5534
    @elizabethbillingsley5534 3 года назад +4

    These two did not know who they were when they married.

  • @iamsadeashley
    @iamsadeashley 3 года назад

    Wow this is beautiful

  • @KaylyaP
    @KaylyaP 3 года назад

    I really like her 😂

  • @ninamohlala8254
    @ninamohlala8254 2 года назад

    Powerful

  • @hilarymeans4801
    @hilarymeans4801 3 года назад

    God is good. WHST A BLESSING

  • @_fayou_
    @_fayou_ 3 года назад

    love it❤

  • @ErinMBlack
    @ErinMBlack 3 года назад

    I hate that the pastor isolated them. I know it was probably befitting for the time, but it wasn’t right. Although he did begin to step outside his covenant, he should have allowed God to exercise his judgement in punishment instead. However, I am glad that the pastor held him accountable and that the husband took responsibility. The work that they continue to do is amazing.

  • @nicolewesley5906
    @nicolewesley5906 3 года назад

    This good

  • @sophieopondo4065
    @sophieopondo4065 3 года назад

    without a shadow of doubt Jesus lives here , what they have is God's Purpose. Lord Jesus your here blessing your people. I'm your people too