Just my thoughts that would have tightened this up. The opening shot is :25 seconds long. Also, add some sound design. There has to be some things going on around the main subject. Something as simple a message sending chime makes it feel more immersive. The two shots around 2:00 feel a bit random. Again there many shots with a lot of silence (lack of sound design). Birds chirping, kids playing in the background, etc... something is better than silence. Overall, not a bad effort. Feel free to ignore my advice. Happy filmmaking.
Just my thoughts that would have tightened this up. The opening shot is :25 seconds long. Also, add some sound design. There has to be some things going on around the main subject. Something as simple a message sending chime makes it feel more immersive. The two shots around 2:00 feel a bit random. Again there many shots with a lot of silence (lack of sound design). Birds chirping, kids playing in the background, etc... something is better than silence. Overall, not a bad effort. Feel free to ignore my advice. Happy filmmaking.