SIMCITY (Zero Punctuation)
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Subscribe to Escapist Magazine! bit.ly/Sub2Esca...
Want to see the next episode a week early? Check out www.escapistmag... for the latest episodes of your favorite shows.
Fast-talking Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw reviews a new game each week in this animated series that combines informed critique with cutting humor. Watch the next episode of Zero Punctuation a week early, only on The Escapist.
Subscribe: bit.ly/Sub2Esca...
Like us on Facebook: / escapistmag
Follow us on Twitter: / theescapistmag
Find us Google+: bit.ly/Escapist...
Follow us on Pinterest: bit.ly/Escapist...
Check out our Merch: www.splitreason...
![Yailin La Mas Viral, @kreizyk.official - Dale 2 (Remix) [Video Oficial]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/JaYHBzgqz94/mqdefault.jpg)
EA being a black tentacle monster would be an improvement.
+Doughboy123x want to know of a better improvement? EA accepting the idea of "used games".
*cough* battlefront *cough*
BLACKIESBOY because EA don't give a damn about what ppl think of them so long as they buy their products, you want EA to change?...starve their wallets.
+Doughboy123x Yeah, they could start *satisfying* our needs. ;)
100 people want to have slimy tentacle monsters to run EA rather than the human beings?
I'm impressed.
The combination of amusing visual gags and... _unique_ commentary is definitely what sets Yahtzee apart from his peers. Whether you agree with him or not, the man is undoubtedly entertaining, especially when he's on his game like in this video, tearing into something that he genuinely doesn't like. I'm grateful to live in a time where this brand of comedy can exist.
Blah b I don't know I thoroughly enjoy the Jimquisition and Top 5 with Lisa Foiles. I also discovered Miracle of Sound through them and there is that one sketch show that they apparently hive which seems to be good but I haven't watched much of it yet.
Bozo Clown Why is that? He brings up some damn good points about the industry.
Bozo Clown What do you mean? It takes up about a minute 1.5 MAX of the show.
Bozo Clown Does it really bother you that much?
Bozo Clown Wow that's pretty damn petty.
I love how all this was done in order to "stop people from pirating their game"... but then pirates found a way to make the game offline, free and origin-less. I don't know about you but that's 3 good reasons to start pirating >:)
Commander Shepard plus you get to wear a eyepatch and a parrot on your shoulder.
yar har
It's almost like you reduce piracy by providing a better service, than punishing those who pay for the product.
If you feel that too many people will steal your game, then you have 2 options: 1 the first being, what EA did, shout fuck all you grubby little shits, step in line or you wont get anything for that 60 bucks. or 2, have you know good customer service and maybe make a game worth paying for, because no pirates will actual pay full retail if they cant steal it, they just wont play your game at all.
wow. crime DOES pay. too bad i don't know how to sell cracked copies on the internet.
***** not to be rude, but theres other options to pay on steam other than using mastercard. other than that, good for him. (i hope the police doesn't listen in on this)
***** ok.
Or 3 make it so that if the game is pirated it will trigger a program that will fuck with it and make it impossible to beat the game or have any fun with it like they did with the witcher
You just not have to be a dick basically. I know a guy who occasionally pirates, and he refuses to pirate telltale and paradox because they're just nice people.
4 years later... And nothing has changed.
It's like war...
Fallout Sim City is a good idea changemymind
War has changed
"and before you say anything, my opinions are actually very clever!" hahaha
OMG! 2:46-2:47! There's a sound effect!
Question: Why do we get so excited about these sorts of things in a Yahtzee vid? Pauses, sound effects, that sorta thing. It's like every one we notice is equivalent to finding a diamond in your cheerios. First you were happy and about to have your fill of something awesome, and then someone stuck a special present buried in a single O that you happened to find.
It isn't actually a sound effec, its probably just his chair squeaking.
y'know with him making a voice for the finger puppet and going "TOOT TOOT ALL ABOARD THE FUN TRAIN!", all i can imagine is if he narrated Thomas the Tank Engine. makes sense, he has the same charisma as George Carlin.
Bollocks (pl.) comes from Old English beallucas (pl.) which in turn comes from Proto-Germanic *ballukaz and means "small ball". Thus "bollocks" means "small balls, testicles", whereas "balls" could be any kind of round objects.
As such, balls is less "offensive" than bollocks.
Years later, Yahtzee dismisses Epic Game Store complaints because "the industry is mired in anti-consumer practice" anyway. Go figure.
When was this?
@@djhutchison His Phoenix Point review ("Phoenix Point & Bug Fables").
Oh god. I realized he was scrubbing himself with the binding of isaac.
Totally agree remember Archon? Good times, good times.
0:52 Scrubbing yourself with "The Binding of Isaac" sounds like a bad idea...
He is doing a review.
His newest review said "next week, okay?"
does anyone else like the "Well there's a Poo map" sequence
+Adam ferguson FUCKING SOLD!
poo map = game of the year
Sim City 5: Traffic Jam Simulator.
"...Fucking Sold!" hahahah that made me laugh!
I lost it at "PURGE"
"Poo Map..."
"...Fucking Sold!"
LMAO! XD
Mass Effect 2, Bad Company 2, Crysis 2 & 3, Dead Space 2 & 3 to name a few.
Also, you guys are forgetting. Most reviews on the internet nowadays (Zero Punctuation; Nostalgia critic) do it to provide a cheap laugh more so than to make an actual point.
Poo Map>Every Problem Sim City has, ALL OF THEM.
I'm American and I found this funny.
Remember when you could upvote comments on RUclips? Good times, good times.
#fuckgoogle #fixyoutube
Very clever, indeed.
Yes Yahtzee you are very clever!
Yes! We thank thee Yahtzee, for this truth! :D
Lol officially not getting this game :P
There is not a single game on Earth (expect for Portal and Silent Hill 2) he won't hate on. So you shouldn't base "buy or not buy" on his opinion :p
True buuut I agree with the whole online thing. Though it's a nice feature it would be way better for us to have the option to not play online if we so choose. Know what I mean?
True story lol
Nathaniel Cain You have an internet connection, clearly. If you start up a private server and invite no people, the server is mainly internal, and if your connection is fairly stable, you should probably feel like you're playing Singleplayer/Offline.
Madarch
Fair enough. But could I play it offline mode. Kinda like Steam?
wait a minute. you mean, EA's entire business is not dependent on Customer satisfaction?
Wait, so what's the no-brainer name for the Dogbollock local sports team?
I see what you did there with the poo map thing.
I'm not saying it's perfect, but any flaw is made up in my book by the amazing story and characters.
All so true...I'm still sticking to Sim City 4
Electronic Arse?
Damn the outro
I only use Origin for battlefield
*Cough* ME3 *Cough*
I DON'T KNOW WHAT WERE YELLING ABOUT!
I thought it was just SimShitty.
Bioware is beyond saving. They released Dragon Age 2 as a shameless cash grab, produced one of the most generic MMOs in years, butchered an epic trilogy in the span of 5 minutes and are now working on a free2play Command & Conquer.
But if you find a way to bring them back, I will be parading around the nation with an army of RUclipsrs devoutly chanting your name as our new god.
EA some times goes over the limits with their "safety filters." Sims 2 had a cheat code to take away the pixels for seeing a nude Sim, but they changed it so you couldn't do it anymore. Can't do it (to my knowledge) for Sims 3, either, but is also bull. I'm an adult, I'm not going to sit and giggle at barbie bodies walking around nude on my screen, I just hate the pixels blurring out half the screen. -.-
One doesn't just watch ONE review of Yahtzee at a atime
no you watch 47
+Francisco Torres What?! Something must be wrong with you, I'm on one hundred!
+Greg. Sym. Did I type 47? My bad I forgot the 1
+MegAnimefreakx3 *1000
+MegAnimefreakx3 You mean one does not simply rewatch all zero punctuations one time a day?
EA stands for Electronic Assimilation. They are not borg, they are worse. Resistance is futile. You favorite studios will be assimilated.
Yahtzee likes the Borg.
RIP maxis
On that note, RIP RespawnEnt
Ok where did I put my Anti Borg phaser?
Not just assimilated, but annihilated.
I think the last EA game I bought was Command and Conquer 3.
Wait command and conquer 3 was an EA game?
The last EA game I bought was Skate It for the Wii... In 2008
@@pauloandrade925 EA bought Westwood studios. Then shut them down.
Well I want to buy command and conquer generals but it's not on steam. They don't have their best game on steam. Fuckers.
Mine was It Takes Two...
"are there any new features sim city can offer me?"
"well there's a poo map"
"...... a beg your pardon"
I always find that hilarious
FUCKING SOLD
It's always either funny or sad when Yahtzee has to stop talking for whatever reason.
San Francisco would like to know your location
I saw your comment before watching so I knew it was coming and it still got me laughing my ass off
My police station was right next to a bank that was robbed.
"Where's the bloody police?!"
Oh, obviously they're driving around the same roundabout...
All 100 Police cars...
Every fucking day...
Well, it was his fault for allowing all those doughnut shops to be set up there..
Just like irl! XD
"Oh but other players will see it! A small innocent child might see it and suddenly know that bollocks exist"
Child: *PURGE*
|*Meanwhile in the child's side*|
"Aww? Why can't I call my town 'Doggy Style Anal Diarrhea 69'?"
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
You watched the video,
And we did too.
Anonymous Brit You obviously don't frequent the same cinemas I do.
That broke me.
I literally hurt myself laughing at the "Town hath too many gays" bit. Send help
Poo map....I couldn't stop laughing
More games now a days need a Poo Map.
*****
FUCKING SOLD!
:D
i think i replayed that part at least 10 times
I absolutely adore Cities: Skylines, but the ONE SINGULAR THING that Simcity had over Cities: Skylines was the shit map. However, the sewerage AI was terrible, and all the shit would always go to the one treatment center and overflow it whilst the other center was full of a bunch of fat bastards who sat around doing nothing all day, at the most it would process the shit that came out of all the fat bastards when one of them got bored of doing his job of fuck all at the sewage plant and went and bought a fucktonne of Taco Bell.
ECL28E you'll grow out of it.
Thy town hath too many gays.
+Muhammad abu sayeed rahman I heard bleach is really tasty this time of year.
Shut up, I wanted to make San Francisco.
Luther Olayemi I'm dying that's too fucking funny. I can barely see the screen through my tears.
"THIM THITY ITH THUPPOTHED TO BE PLAYED ONLINE, SND IF YOU CANT GET A THABLE CONNECTHION, YOURE NOT HAVING A GOOD EXPERIENTHE."
"I AGREE WITH THAT LAST PART"
+ASB “Anand SB” PCGamer I literally have to pause these videos every couple of seconds to laugh, but this one had me laughing for a while.
"I'd like to quote now from a statement made by Maxis... Which I will read in an insulting and dismissive voice." XDDDDDDDDD
Comedic genius... In that it's comedy 101: punchlines are funny when they're unexpected, when they twist the audience's expectations at the answer.
This is why I play Cities: Skylines!
I would like to see him do a review on that game
Yahtzee 'n Gabe did something like a review for their Let's Drown Out episode of that game. Suffice to say, they had far more fun with Skylines than he did with Simcity.
watch?v=BAE0omLt9dk
It didnt exist back in 2013
Dark Designs That's beside the point. Skylines is still a far better game than SimCity.
CrazyCashGaming Of course but without Sim City, City Skylines wouldn't have been made.
>Well, there's a poo map.
>I beg your pardon?
>We've got a special map that let's you see all the poo, forming in big piles under people's houses. Then you can build an outlet pipe and watch all the poo speed away on a wee-wee one-way system.
> (beat) FUCKING SOLD!
Stay off 4chan kid.
I do, it just keeps invading like /i/
Yep, that's what he said in that part.
haha, best zero punctuation episode Ive seen yet
Same here.
I think his sarcastic Duke Nukem Forever video is the best.
I think my favorite is the DayZ episode
*****
People only liked that because it was that kind of bad that everyone agrees with, Yeah he disliked it, but it was just saying "Hey please point out how bad this game is". Dull and predictable.
CornishCreamtea07 I think he was referring to the fake one
That's a typo. It was supposed to be Electronic Rats.
More like Electronic Ass
Evil Arseholes.
I like Extruding Arsholes better.
I thought it was Electronic Bastards, but they were too lazy to put in the rest of the letters.
Evil Arseholes
The city of ********** sounds like a very nice place to move to.
"Where are you from?"
"I'm dogbollockese, thank you"
orangesheepdog Hyde and I can get the new year so that you can get a few days of the new York city of
when yahtzee begins his preaching about extroverted idiots and multiplayer I swoon.
Sounds like you're going gay for Yahtzee. :D
Worth it
Not sure how I feel about that myself...I'm pretty introverted and I got WAAY into playing Halo 3 online years ago. I guess that's doesn't really count though, since I pretty much hated using the mic, hated getting friend requests, and in the event that I would accept one out of weakness, I would then try to sneak around all stealthy by turning off my "I'M ONLINE NOW!!!WOOOWOOO!!!!!!" icon so they wouldn't find me because I didn't have the strength to delete them.
@@VeritableSmorgasbord Jesus you just described me with Dota 2 perfectly. We're a group, we're a tribe, let's all... stand at a respectful distance and nod at each other.
I never found a way to disable the "I'm online" siren permanently, so whenever I hit the power button on my console it was a mad dash through the menus to find the option to turn it off in the
'Charge micropayments--'
FOR GOD'S SAKE CROSHAW DON'T GIVE THEM IDEAS!!!
darastarscream Fast-forward to 2017....
If only you knew.
Too late
Even to this day it still tickles me that EA put out such a shitty game thinking they had cornered the market on city simulators only to be entirely overshadowed by Cities Skylines that did everything better on a smaller budget in Unity.
"why did you click this video" because i wanna hear someone complain about ea
His summery of EA has definitely stood the test of time.
That's cannon now.
For some reason, I feel compelled to share this one funny experience I had with Simcity when a little while after it came out. I was playing "with" one of my friends and we were selling each other our excess capacity for sewage and such when I noticed I could send buses to his city. I sent a few busses over for some commuters and tourists and such. A little bit later he tells me he's having traffic issues and he's not sure why. Upon further inspection, it was being caused by my buses. Every time they went around a corner they somehow duplicated slowly grinding his city to a halt.
Wonder if we are gonna see Cities : Skylines any time soon...
Probably not because 1. the game actually works and 2. the game doesnt have poop maps
he could be all here EA this is what a successful game at launch looks like and you don't even have to dick everyone about...
Jack Kingston But it does let you flood cities with poop rivers.
7.8/10 not enough shit xD
Zatchooze Naut yea I saw that was a thing, although I only watched a bit of it due to how boring it was.
DOGBOLLOCK
WE LICK 'EM
Pure gold. If only EA woulda let him do it...
This is the first Yahtzee review to make me pause the video for 3 solid minutes while I laughed uncontrollably. That voice he did for the EA tentacle doll, especially when describing the poo map, obliterated my sides.
I love how at 0:45 the Origin shed has the Escapist watermark by it; making it look like EA own The Escapist.
Figgy it’s on the steam shed
Never noticed that until now
Wrong shed
Just FWY for the people confused, the video has a baked-in watermark (Steam shed, bottom left), but on the desktop version of YT, they also add the channel logo as an overlay over the video, in the bottom right.
(Presumably a cheap atempt to stop people from recording videos? As if there aren’t sites that let you download them anyway...)
Choo-choo! All aboard the fun train! I Fucking died!
...but I am waiting for Zooey Deschanel to drag me off...
Acer Ng | But not everyone.
Same here.
I want her to drag me off to the skating rink, the cinema, the record store, the library, the cyber gadget store and the nearest furry convention.
"...meant to be played online"
Then why have they recently added a single player mode?
This video was released a year ago today, so how the hell would he know that they RECENTLY added a single player mood?
xBornPredatorx That was aimed at EA. "We added a single player mode even though we first said it was meant to be played online."
EHH246 Well it's mostly because DRM was no longer needed cause the game's been already cracked and not that many people actually want to play it. Now they can shut down servers and save a lot of money.
EHH246 And here I was hoping EA finally found a brain cell and realized that city builder games were meant to be single player to promote creativity.
TheZaphod88
4:05 Still one of my favorite parts of any ZP video.
"The theory was sound." XD
3:19 Just went and bought Sim City. mainly because of the poo map.
Haha, this one is the absolute best. I absolutely loved it.
Btw. Is there actually a new feature called "poo map"? :D
yeah its the pollution map
Russ no, thats for the air, there is a map in which you can see the flow of your sewers
Yeah, it's pretty funny to watch once you place down the first sewage treatment building or whatever.
That double-take at 3:21 is such a good little animation detail.
That picture of him eloping with SimCity 4 always makes me smile.
His reaction at the mention of the poo map was just priceless.
so (online dickwizardry aside) what made simcity so much worse than cities skylines? i pirated one before buying the other and they seem about the same to me; both will bring all city growth and cash income screeching to a halt once you have enough people in it, causing city-wide gridlock even though every road is a six-lane superhighway and you've spent hours developing the public transport network so all of 5 citizens can use it.
I should torture myself because I actually wanna try SimCity, and I feel like even touching SimCity will make me a dirty EA Loyalist.
you will miss your money later.
Yeah, I know. Which is why I'll stick to playing SimCity 4: Deluxe when I can get it out of the garage. Most of my games are packed, as we recently moved.
*****
lol my 64 is someware in my garage never to be seen again.
I see. I'm sorry to hear that, man. Did you have any good games for it?
*****
tones man DK 64, vigilante 8, 1080 snowboarding, mario 64, zelda Majoras mask and ocorina of time, and a lot of others
I don't care what Video of your I'm watching I always end up Laughing Uncontrollably!!
Yeah Sim City 4 is so much better. The thing that made me say nope was the fact that my useable land was about as big as a small city on 3000 unlimited.
The game is over eight months old and still has major problems that have yet to be addressed, but they seemed to have time to develop an expansion pack. Maxis has really gone downhill.
Ah, the last game EA will ever have seen money for from me. No seriously, I have not played a single EA title since I bought this fustercluck and will take that attitude to my grave.
There were two things I hated about this game.
1) The AI was stupid. It was nails on chalkboard painful to watch your public services form a swarm and all try to service the same problem at the same time. It was worse than the walkers in a Sierra historical city simulator. At least with the walkers you could place road blocks that occasionally forced them to do their job. In this game you would add a new bus to help out and it then watch it inevitablly get drawn into the swarm of buses that stalked your city like swarm of retarded locusts.
2) It was hard to get some of the special industries off the ground. I tried to make a gambling town, and after a certain point the crowds would just shrink no matter what I did.
As an extrovert, I feel I must say I HATE ONLINE GAMES. If I wanted to be insulted and feel inferior in the game, I'd just go to my friends in real life. At least I like them and can drinks with them.
Evi1M4chine I know this comment is old, but the fuck are you talking about? Wtf triggered that response!?
Online games actually make me feel more alone as these strangers you play against may as well be bots.
Multiplayer only really works with friends, not usually with strangers.
The Jonestown Daycare joke was horrible, yet so insanely funny. XD
:(
FUCK, i shouldnt watch these in school, laughing to much :P
Yahtzee sounds really drunk if you watch it at half speed
I hope you enjoy getting all your videos demonetized with youtube's new automatic "service" that judges videos as "not advertiser friendly" if it contains vulgar language. Ah, do a Zero Punctuation video about that!
So, Yahtzee has played The Binding of Isaac? 0:55
"Let's all laugh at an industry that never learns anything, teeheehee!"
This Video persuaded me to buy SimCity......... SimCity 4
aperturesciencegames EA appreciates your money. Just make sure you don't fund the competition (ex., Cities Skylines), citizen.
RFC3514 Are you one of those people that assumes giving money to any game for its individual quality, despite the company itself being bad makes me a douche because I am supporting "THE BIG EVIL ESTABLISHMENT, OH NOES!
Ok so I like, Splinter Cell, but I guess cause Ubisoft is bad, I can't buy that, or Farcry or any Tom Clancy game
I like Dragon Age and Mass Effect, I like the Star wars games, but EA is evil so I guess I can't buy those either :P
aperturesciencegames I'm "one of those people" who just told you that EA appreciates your money and loves the fact that you didn't even consider any alternatives from other companies.
I'm also "one of those people" who can see the irony in the way a bad review of a SimCity game made you go out and buy another SimCity game that you otherwise wouldn't have. Just goes to show that even bad publicity (and bad products) can be profitable.
Maybe if SimCity 2016 is even worse, some people will read the bad reviews and buy the 2013 version.
RFC3514 Oh so your being assumptive and just assumed I didn't do any research into other games before buying SimCity 4?
And then assumes SimCity 4 is bad, well guess what? In this exact fucking review, Zero Punctuation RECCOMENDS SimCity 4
and it was on sale on Steam, so yeah I went and bought it!
deal with it :p
Why don't you extend the courtesy of knowing someone's intentions before you act like an arrogant airhead
Edit: Sorry, I am a bit on edge today, so understand my insults stem from being easy to incite at this moment
aperturesciencegames You're the one who said this video had persuaded you to buy SimCity 4. Sorry for "assuming" that meant this video had persuaded you to buy SimCity 4. It was indeed silly of me to "assume" that someone on the internet actually meant what they said.
Seems a bit odd to go "research other games" _after_ you've been persuaded, but hey, it's also a bit odd to "research" other city building games and miss (for example) the recent video where the very same Yahtzee plays Skylines. But maybe you were persuaded to buy that as well, and just didn't mention it here.
Either way, I really don't care.
I just stated the obvious: that EA is happy to take your money even if the thing that persuaded you to give it to them was a review saying what a horrible company they are. I "dealt with it" on my first post (by pointing out the irony), end of story.
You're the one who started getting very defensive and trying to label me as "one of those people" who do this or that, and (again, quite ironically) making a lot of assumptions about things I never said while calling me "assumptive".
Fucking sold!
I for one am YEARNING for the day Zoey Deschanel commits property damage on her quest to go to a roller rink with me. It would be ever so cute.
See now you've done it Yahtz.
Same here.
I'm waiting for Google Earth to add a poo map feature!
I played the game for a week... 6months ago...
same
Maybe EA now stands for Extrovert Appealers
EA = Extreme Addicts (to $)
I'm an extreme introvert but I'd love for Zooey Deschanel to smash my door down and take me to a roller rink.
OMG this
The Zooey deschanel part still kills me hahaha
She is my number one waifu since I was a kid.
And I had a dream that I was dating her and then she turned into a magical werefox before I realised I could also turn into a magical werefox.