@@pk3m3 The idea of "Who you want to be" is a ridiculous trope. You are already a person, you're already somebody the moment you're born. It's up to you do determine what you will do with your life, but doing one thing doesn't mean you turn into someone else.
@@egorsurimov5996If you say yes all the time to your partner even when you don’t want to deep down, she’ll lose belief that you are saying yes because you want to
I cant be myself because who tf would like an all day sitting down gamer never going to drink a coffee on his own? 😂 Like comon we all have to change into what society wants
@@deimosok2003honestly you’d be surprised. If u embrace urself long enough you’ll be able to slowly improve. If u try to improve for others it’ll always be face and surface level. Embrace where ur at don’t shame urself. Try to best to improve many will like u many won’t. You’ll get more love and more hate. The hate is because people are jealous ur being urself If you died right now are you a 100% sure you’d go to heaven? All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Due to our sin. Hell is the punishment .“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”Revelation 21:8 KJV but Jesus who is God. Came down to earth as a man lived a perfect life never sinned people got jealous of him got him convicted on false charges then he died buried and resurrectedRemember how I said our sin is why we can’t go to heaven? The only thing that can wash away your sins in the blood of Jesus “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.” Roman’s 5:8-9 KJV So to get saved is super easy “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast.”Ephesians 2:8-9 KJV Salvation is a free gift by faith alone. You can’t earn it by going to church, getting water baptized, or by any good thing you do. “For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.”2 Corinthians 7:10 KJV Then you just have to feel guilty and sorry for being a sinner and repent for being a sinner. Do you feel guilty for being a sinner? If you do then there’s just one final step. “that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.”Romans 10:9 KJV all you have to do is tell God out loud with your mouth that you believe the gospel. You MUST mean it from your heart to work. You can pray something like this “dear God i repent as a sinner. i believe jesus is God, who died, buried, and ressurected, so his blood can wash away my sins. so i only trust in the blood alone to save me not my good works. Save me from hell in jesus name i pray amen”
This is real wisdom. Been married for 14 years. I love my wife. That does not mean I just make her feel better all the time. That does not mean I do whatever she says. She often is mad at me. But, I learned she would HATE me if I did anything else. It’s a hard lonely job often. My biggest wish is that we men can see, respect, and support this in each other. We need brothers.
@@abdulquadiransari7476 take an ideal father figure as an example. He has to be strong and protective, sometimes being stubborn and fierceful, so everything is in place. You have to command respect, sometimes you have to not be good but righteous, and that requires some sacrifices, especially in the eyes of your loved ones.
It’s not about saying no to her, it’s about thinking rationally of situation and deciding if the situation is good for both of you or not - this is building stability and trust into man.
That rationality is harsh sometimes. I was head over heels in love with my ex, but we were too different. We were arguing and I called out the reality of our situation. Hardest thing I did but the decision I’m proud of making.
Nah, it’s about saying no.. 😂 don’t be delusional, if you don’t like something, tell her you don’t like it. If her response isn’t an apology and her never doing it again, dump her, or continue to be a simp
I fucked up my relationship by not showing my true intentions during the most important part with her, an intimate moment, and i greatly regret not telling what i wanted.
@armandoguerra7658 Easier, maybe, happier not really. It feels like the biggest mistake I've made, and it's a single youtube comment condensed for ease of understanding for..some folks, i guess. It's just that a lot has happened for my ex-girlfriend in her past, and i tried to be the "one" for her. Rookie mistake, and yeah, my mind was too far in the clouds as well, since it was my first time that i had a gf. I've learned, but the cost was high for me personally. Sorry for the long ass text, btw lol
@@jackdaw3822 don’t worry man, You could have wrote 4 more paragraphs and I would have read it and responded anyway. One of the few useful tips my father told me was that my first girlfriend wouldn’t last, and I got very angry, and got me railed up against him, but then, with the years I understood what he was trying to say, it is because I wasn’t ready, and neither was she, baggage comes in a lot of ways and shapes, and due to the fact that this might be hell, I would take it as easy as I could. I got more girlfriends and took betrayals you couldn’t imagine, and I’ve learned that what I want, and what exist, might not coincide in reality, and that’s okey, protect your divine spark, and try to be the best version of you, not for others sake, but for yours. Most people want to take the pain that was inflicted upon them onto others, don’t be like them, take the hit and learn from it. I myself let a woman take advantage of me because I wanted to be loved so bad, and I took that lesson, unfortunately, this is what this world is, punishment with some goodness sprinkled on the top.
@@jackdaw3822 I gave you a lengthy response that seems to have been deleted, either way, don’t punish yourself too much, this world will already do that to you.
just went thru a relationship and came to realize that first lesson, it’s crazy how after experiencing that i can reflect on each time i bended my will when i could have managed the situation differently
this man speaks the truth. I had this problem with my now wife. Our relationship was a mess for a while. Since I've found my frame she's never been more attracted to me. For anyone that thinks this won't work women, give it a try, you'll be surprised at the results.
This man has great point but also is proyecting his experiencies like if it were the only truth, listen to this man but also remember that every relationship is different everyone has their unique way they like to be treated, this are great pointers but ultimatly you have to learn the way to treat your partner
Exactly this. But I think he is a good man for also saying that his way is not the only one. Too many people fall into simplistic thinking styles (me included) which means we can only give advice from the perspective that we have.
Absolutely spot on it gets really tiresome listening to people talk about relationships and life so mechanically. For me atleast, girls are just people like us at the end of the day and no one wants to be in a relationship with a suck up. But yea he does have some good wisdom.
I’d like to add that sometimes there is no “right” answer. Sometimes it comes down to you deciding which decision will result in little to zero resentment.
If you are unapologetically yourself & she RESPECTS you as you are you won, if you can’t be yourself around her & you have to act like something your not you lost
your ego is calling it bad, cus of societal expectations and the expectations ur parents threw on you when u were a kid. but in reality it´s just authenticity and being who u really are deep down inside
I want to agree with you When I was younger, my parents did put a lot of expectations on me to do Good But when they split Something changed And I had to raise my siblings. There’s so many things I’d like to talk about But Not enough time Thank you so much for ruining this
5:14 Yeah I think a lot of us men fold under the pressure of that initial negative reaction. All we want is to make our gfs happy so it’s easy to become this yes man. All I heard as a kid was “happy wife, happy life” but those 4 words don’t tell the whole story at all. Thank you for this video
What about someone who has never had a relationship with a woman? I am currently 20 years old… I know I’m still young… But I’m very tired of going to bed and seeing nobody next to me. But My parents split when I was young So the only love I was ever taught is now tarnished .
I'm at my lowest right now. I wish i could have know this way before. This help so much more than trying to talk to my own father or mother. This video made my day, thank you.
Seeing this after a mutual breakup agreement. Ive been binge watching a lot of psychology videos these past days, i learned alot from it. But you, the way you delivered the message, and your vibes. Immaculate, fkg legend. PREACH
Learning to be honest and upfront with my intentions and desire has been the best change in my life. I finally feel like my authentic self and not a walker in my skin.
I always say, "The more a woman complains about you, the more she likes you". Dude's right tho. It's not about being an "asshole". Being a "bad" guy simply means that you don't yield or cave when you believe the course of action is best to progress/improve your or the relationship's situation. In other words, stay on YOUR course, put YOUR purpose first ALWAYS and she will either get onboard or not
You are a very intelligent person, man. I find it very hard to find people giving good, reasonable advice on apps like these as time progresses. You hit the nail on the head though
My girl I have been dating for 4 months now, she recently did some small things that made me wonder if I can really trust her. Whenever something like that came up, I would go over to her house the same day, we would lie down in bed and talk it out. She tends to think a little too optimistic sometimes, like a dude texted her frequently and she was being nice to him. To me, it was so obvious that he wanted something from her but in her opinion it was fine to just not answer frequently, instead of telling him that she is happily with me. By now, she did tell him and he also told her that it is unacceptable to be this nice to him and almost flirty from a guys point of view when she is commited to me. Chances are, if she is a genuinely good girl and she does some inappropriate stuff, she just needs to learn how to behave in a relationship, and thats okay. Its her first relationship and she is a quiet good girl. You can tell her what you expect from her. If you do, she will adapt. If you dont, you will start to build resentment and the relationship breaks apart. Also: When women say that men should be more sensitive, loving, emotional and all of that. They dont talk about all men. They talk about the men that they perceive and see in the world. The top 20% in terms of attractiveness, who tend to be rather bad. THEY are supposed to be more good so that they become more balanced in terms of good and bad. Most guys dont understand this and although they are already good, they hear that, try to be even more "good" and then wonder why they dont score high with women. Being a total nice guy. Just dont be overly bad nor good. If you are German, check out Peter Frahm who is a good coach if you want to become such a man.
Sounds like you discussed it like a man, as you should. I would also have just suggested to her that if she can't behave in a way that is conducive to your values over the long haul, then the whole relationship you two have may just be better suited as a casual, "not serious" thing. If she's super into you, she'll hate the idea and snap into shape. And you are setting boundaries. Sometimes a masculine guiding hand is all they need to act right. Good luck buddy!
@@mhill88ify Yeah, she was shocked when I indicated that I would walk away if there was something going on with that guy. She probably didnt expect that this behavior was that bad, but thats why you gotta lead her. She was absolutely in shock and legitimately had a panic attack after our calm argument. And we talked about it twice on seperate days, and she accepted that she made a mistake, especially after the guy also told her that it is not acceptable to be with someone and text stuff like "I find you funny too". But I am 99,9% sure she is committed to me, we've been dating for over 4 months now. She has told me that she has strong feelings for me too but that she can have issues on the spot to communicate that through words. We will see, this Friday I'll address the topic of going into a relationship. I am 99% sure she will say yes, we even had sex twice although she has a traumatic past with that, as well as making out although she also has a traumatic past with that. I am sure she feels very safe with me and there are no big red flags (after my first relationship, I am very concious about them :D )
Right. From experience just make it clear the intention to set boundaries is for the better of both of you in the relationship she’ll respect that. The right woman will see it “for the better” the wrong woman will see it as “controlling” If shes not willing to commit to your boundaries respectfully walk away ..
Genuine and real solid advice. My girl and I are happy because we both question everything and work through it all, but saying no is still helpful advice. I learned boundaries are super important, and having your own life is important too, for respect. Don’t make yourself a doormat, be polite though. This guy knows what he’s talking about. Thanks for actually having these real discussions. And if you don’t have haters, you’re doin something wrong. Cliche but true 🔥
I can't get it honestly. "If you have no haters then you're doing something wrong". So if in my social circles (obviously those people I spend all the time with) I don't make anyone angry just because they saw me (one of characteristics of hate in my book), if I don't make anyone experience negative emotions, then I'm doing something wrong, huh? How is this even true? I'm not a doormat, I and my friends have different arguments sometimes, but no one hates anyone else. Everyone respects everyone else in my social circles, so we don't have a problem with saying 'no', with rejecting or changing plans and so on. Maybe it's language barrier though, because in my native language "hate" is a very strong word, it's usually used in meaning of extreme displeasure and anger, so extreme that one wouldn't want the object of their hate to exist at all (can be applied to anything, people as well) So please explain it to me, I would really appreciate an answer for this one.
@ maybe it’s not like “you need haters who really hate you” but you should have people critiquing you and pointing out where you’re slipping. If it’s all roses and butterflies, something is wrong or missing. There should be other people out there who will likely disagree with you or your beliefs or methods and that’s okay, you should still do you because you’re not doing things for others. Do them for yourself or for the greater good. Utilitarian, kinda, but also don’t be afraid to be your honest self, show your darker shadowy side some, or express it in some form or other. Just be yourself, do you and disregard how others might judge you. If your friends like you that’s fine of course, but someone out there can disagree with you or your beliefs and that’s fine. But also true, in English, words that are often used like “hater” get watered down. The more it’s used, the less it means the same. And haters don’t necessarily mean someone with a super strong hate, but a sort of strong dislike I guess 😅
@@Ganonduff ah, yeah, it makes much more sense now, thank you! Seems like the original phrase just uses very strong words, having much more complex meaning underneath. Thanks!
Omg YESSSS!!! No fence but I’ve learned little from this video but that’s not because you’re wrong. It’s because it’s exactly my approach to life and relationships. I often get called selfish for this approach but I strongly believe that it’s not selfishness but rather knowing your worth. Knowing what and who you need in your life. I will say things straight. Often early in a relationship. If they can’t take it then why waste time. The values and lifestyles have to align or at least not be interfering with each other
This makes me so upset. I started like this, & I tried to change to who I thought she wanted & as I change, things got worse so I was breaking my back & becoming someone who I wasn’t & eventually I was being disrespected & treated so unfairly & ate that $#!? Thinking it was for the best. This, this was the reset I needed to reassure me that my true self was always the way to be
She asked me how I felt about her, I told her the truth, she left. I hope she comes back, but theres nothing I can do within my rights to convince her, except keep being what made her like me in the first place.
today i had to be the "bad" man. I had to tell my partner that I didn't want her hanging out with or being around her guy friends because it made me feel like crap. She complained and it made her feel terrible deep down. I had to try so hard to not give the boundary more leniency out of feeling bad for her. I knew that if i had let this go on that it would end up hurting us more in the long run. Then i come home to seeing this video on my page. Thanks so much for the advice Bene Ri!
Something I also went through recently. I was torn up inside because she spent so much time alone with a male friend but who was I to speak out, one of my best friends is female albeit only hanging out with me a few times a year since we live far apart. It’s a tough situation, to rationalize gender in relationships or to believe innate nature.
guys... being good for just the sake of bit is the hole idea, not to achieve something or get something back, thats a rabbit hole my friends, and again always take what fits u right, and keep an open mind with strong sense of self, so u dont repeat other peoples ideas, and instead create your own. P.D. nice video my man! love ur reflexions.
You invite her into your world, not vice versa. If she wants in, good. If she doesn’t align with your world, see if she’d change. If yes, good. If not, move on.
Damn bro, this showed up at the best time. My Wife and I have a strong relationship but in recent months we have been still close but she has lost trust in me. I basically trust in her judgement about things and often go against my own instincts and let her call the shots on many things. Our sex life dropped off more recently and she told me she doesn't trust my leadership anymore. Then this video came across my feed 2 days later. I needed to hear this, thank you.
It’s so hard right now. I’m trying to talk to someone, trying beaucase it’s so hard to forget the past. In 10 years that past, will be a great story but right now, in the present, there’s just fear. But I’m not giving up, she seems so Nice. I Hope someone understands me ❤
Speaking from experience, there are a lot of young men out there in need of personal conversations with men that have healed perceptions of women and appropriate relationships with them (sisters, mothers, girlfriends/wives)
Powerful video. It's not the fact that doing these things you say would actually be "bad". But rather, when you are afraid to live authentically as yourself, you see it as bad in some way. Otherwise you'd be doing it. You must take the plunge to do the "bad" thing and be more honest and real, and trust that you will be able to realise that it's actually a good choice so long as what you do is appropriate. I like this message. I'm an anxious person who has been growing, healing, learning and unlearning. I am beginning to live my truth, so this video found me at a great time to push me to keep it up. Thank you for this 💪🏻
Awesome points man. You really opened my eyes a lot. I’ve recently gotten out of a toxic relationship and fuck me I realise now it was more 50/50 than I want to admit. Definitely a lot of stuff in here I was lacking on and blaming her for reacting the her DNA is telling her too. Ps: I’m not excusing her for what she’s done but I know now I can’t excuse myself anymore
I watched one of your videos about 6 months ago after going through a break up and you said something along the lines of isn’t it weird how a guy always ends up with the crazy/depressed girl maybe it’s the guy it changed my life thank you man
RUclips recommended me you for some reason and I like it. I like your voice, dude, and your speech, like a friend to a friend. Anyway, I've watched the first two points and I want to disagree with the way you call it "bad". Being honest, sincere and open is not bad. Being vulnerable acknowledging you can't be there for her or that you don't like something is a virtue, not a weakness or "being a jerk". We, men, are taught to be independant and dependant, always be strong and reliable, but with all honesty, all of us have fears, weaknesses, moments of vulnerability, and it's totally normal. And not being afraid of your own vulnerabilities in presense of a person you trust the most of all is a great way to become even closer. This way this person understands you better and emphasizes you better. "Being vulnerable" might be considered "being bad" for men, so in that regard the way you put it is actually logical. I am not in position to argue or tell you you are wrong because you are not. I just wanted to give an alternative point of view on the points you've discusses in the video. Thank you for your perspective and for sharing your life experience! Wish you all the good in life!
I’ve known this for a while, but i was 4 years into a relationship with my girlfriend and got too comfortable and let my guard down thinking we would last forever. Recently just broken up and looking back I’m realising I was too nice towards the end of the relationship
I thought I was being nice and polite, when I asked what she wanted to eat for dinner every time. Little did I know I was pushing her away every time I asked that.
Coming from experience and as someone who is studying psychology as a major I can say this is some genuinely stellar advice. Some people may watch this video and think that he is swaying more towards an “alpha male mindset”, but this simply isn’t the case here.
I really need some good advice. I was dating someone a while ago, and while it didnt work out and I for the most part got over it, I realized I messed it up in some ways by being “too nice”. I should have said what I really thought more. Though we werent that compatible, I still feel like things could’ve been different. I want to move on but I can’t forgive myself for these mistakes. I dont know why, I just can’t accept that I messed up. With relationships I feel like its different than most things. If you mess it up once, there aren’t good odds that you’ll get a second chance. Just want some advice if anyone has it. I want to stop thinking about this, its honestly driving me crazy and draining me mentally. Maybe the solution is to stop thinking and focus on moving on
What I got from this is that he is telling me to be myself better my self love my self just be who I am. I download this video and you 🫵🏾should do the same and listen this again and again just like me.
Honestly I'm gonna give my two cents as well and just say that I never got more attention and attraction from ladies until I just started being who I am. No sugarcoating all the little BS. I am what I am and that's just what it is. I was gonna say we need more voices out here preaching this but I've heard it since I was a wee lad that "all you gotta do is be yourself" and I haven't truly rationalized that understood what it meant until recently. Just be you for you and someone will come along the way who is genuinely attracted to YOU. Ain't that what we all generally want for the most part y'all?
Is it weird that this happened to me but in the opposite way? She just agrees for everything even when it is obvious that she doesn't want that This has impacted my attraction for her, she just isn't her own person her own self she just wants to do everything for me and it also obviously hurts her
I don't think that's weird. Confidence is sexy in women and it's a form of confidence to be able to voice her displeasure of an idea. Like the guy in the video said, if you feel she will say yes to everything it devalues it. If she said no to some things unapologetically, it means that when she says yes you know that you're attractive enough or have earned the yes, rather than it simply being symptomatic of a person being manipulatable and scared. If you liked that, it might mean you enjoy controlling her and are a nasty person. But you don't like it. You want your woman to be stronger. Happier. Also, if you can push her around, perhaps instinctually you know on a subconscious level that if you have kids with her she will give in to their requests at the detriment of the development of discipline, which isn't a good thing for the child.
I should've seen this when it came out. If I'd have seen it then I would probably still be with the woman I loved. I placed her and her wants in front of myself and disappeared myself. We had the connection, the sexual drive and everything. I'm broken at the moment but working on myself.
I wholly agree with what is being said in this video. But I'd like to add something here based on my own experiences: Your past relationships might show signs of this dynamic he's describing here. There might even be instances where you can directly deduce that you could've acted "better" - just like the video is saying. And there's often great lessons to learn here. But don't underestimate the unique dynamics and personality of your (ex) partner. This might sound a bit controversial but there's a considerable amount of women in today's society that aren't in touch with their feminine side either. Meaning- just like we as men ought to be in touch with our true masculine selves, a girlfriend ought to be in touch with her feminine. Some girls aren't. They switch back and forth. They don't reveal their full feminine side. Maybe due to trauma, maybe due to their upbringing, friends, family- either way, as long as she's not playing her part, it'll always prove difficult to pursue what he's describing in this video. A woman that is unwilling to lean into her feminine will continously contest your masculine. She'll wear you down and make you smaller and weaker, unbeknownst to you for the longest time. I urge you to be aware of this. It might super spiritual or smth but it's not that deep, just something to keep in mind. Not every girl will enable you to be in your masculine. And it's better to step back as a man and leave if that's the case. Because no matter how things might seem great from time to time, this will always catch up to you. And inevitably lead to a bad outcome eventually - whether that is a straight up breakup or just an unfullfilling relationship. In order for you to be your best and true self, she must be her best and true self as well.
Thank you for the content, it’s good reflective content. One point that felt unsettling to me was about saying what you mean. I completely understand how bending one’s will to fit into what they think others want makes them untrustworthy. But what if you don’t have an opinion on something. I guess this made me feel like there’s a strange pressure to force that opinion, what would be an honest response in that stituation? because saying i don’t know feels like instability.
True, but that doesn't mean you embrace your masculine energy thats unattractive many men will agree with that. Sure, there are times when a man becomes little feminine and a women becomes little masculine mostly when the times are hard But, most of the time it shouldn't be like this if you want that feminine masculine dynamic in the relationship. I am just trying to say if you're a female embrace your feminine side as much as possible and use your masculine side only when needed (for ex: your man goes off track or is going in a degenerate way)
@@Om_B did you not take the video's message to heart? Be your authentic self so you get the person who is right for you, unapologetically. It may be unattractive to many men, but she's not going for many men is she? A partner is going to live with you and be there so much of the time that you are going to suffer if you can't be yourself around them. On top of that if they cannot accept who you are and like to be, they are not the right one for you.
@@Om_B That's the main way to look at it, the most important part! People are most fit to find a partner who is fit for them when they can be themselves as much as possible.
what if you're in a relationship with a woman who complains that you never lead her, but anytime you take the lead she ALWAYS complains and says you did it wrong or you're "incapable" of leading? anytime you try to make peace for her or do something nice for her you're met with criticism about how it isnt right. What if you're trying so hard to do right but its NEVER good enough, no matter how much effort and thought was put in? imagine waking up everyday and knowing you're never going to make her happy no matter how hard you try, but you still try only to be met with comments about "if you wanted to you would" or "you just dont care about me" what if you are only intimate 1-2X a month and then you try to caringly tell your feelings about how you are feeling undesired, unloved and you miss that intimacy and then she tells you your views about sex are disgusting and youre delusional? fellas i need help. i dont know what to do anymore and after 8 years i dont feel loved, appreciated, accepted or desired anymore. im really thinking about jumping ship but i dont know what to do anymore.
Great job with putting yourself out there and asking for help Gary! I don't read comments often so you're lucky I saw this but you could message me on Instagram (instagram.com/bene_ri_) or send me an email at beneri.yt@gmail.com so I can help you out ✌🏼
Hey Gary - I say leave her. The comments above didn’t give any advice - you should leave her brother. Work on yourself, be single for a bit. Practice abstinence/continence and live a healthy lifestyle and put yourself out there to attract someone you deserve. They say you attract what you are. Be the best version of you and let someone else deal with this girl.. I know it’s hard but when a girl acts like how you say she’s acting, she already knows and has decided that she’s not attracted to you anymore. Which happens to all guys. Girls can be unpredictable but its not a bad thing if something that makes you unhappy or seems like its not going to work out ends. Let it end
Yes! Corey Wayne all the way! I've been following his work for 5 years. I haven't checked out that other person though so I'll see what that's all about@@margaretc5679
Funny enough I was being myself, when I was trying to date this girl I liked. She ended up thinking I was lying, or had bad intentions, or gas lighted her into things. I legit liked her. I guess I wasn't toxic enough or wasn't like her boyfriend's. Anyways I've dodge a bullet.
This is one of those cold buckets of water a lot of guys need. Be yourself unapologetically, not what you think she wants you to be.
It's hard to unlearn all the false teachings you've been taught abt this stuff as a kid tho
@@m.s6340 Yeah well, that's the challenge
Absolutely, I don’t give a fuck anymore, I’m myself take it or leave it
Takes some life experience to figure out who you want and are going to be. Words are just words, theres no better teacher than living life.
@@pk3m3 The idea of "Who you want to be" is a ridiculous trope. You are already a person, you're already somebody the moment you're born. It's up to you do determine what you will do with your life, but doing one thing doesn't mean you turn into someone else.
“If you don’t say no when you want to say no she will lose trust in your yes.”
This is gold.
what ?
@@egorsurimov5996If you say yes all the time to your partner even when you don’t want to deep down, she’ll lose belief that you are saying yes because you want to
@@B4_E ah damn ok
If you manage to attract a woman by not being yourself you are in for some real existential pain
I cant be myself because who tf would like an all day sitting down gamer never going to drink a coffee on his own? 😂 Like comon we all have to change into what society wants
@@deimosok2003honestly you’d be surprised. If u embrace urself long enough you’ll be able to slowly improve. If u try to improve for others it’ll always be face and surface level. Embrace where ur at don’t shame urself. Try to best to improve many will like u many won’t. You’ll get more love and more hate. The hate is because people are jealous ur being urself
If you died right now are you a 100% sure you’d go to heaven?
All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Due to our sin. Hell is the punishment
.“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”Revelation 21:8 KJV
but Jesus who is God. Came down to earth as a man lived a perfect life never sinned people got jealous of him got him convicted on false charges then he died buried and resurrectedRemember how I said our sin is why we can’t go to heaven? The only thing that can wash away your sins in the blood of Jesus
“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.” Roman’s 5:8-9 KJV
So to get saved is super easy
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast.”Ephesians 2:8-9 KJV
Salvation is a free gift by faith alone. You can’t earn it by going to church, getting water baptized, or by any good thing you do.
“For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.”2 Corinthians 7:10 KJV
Then you just have to feel guilty and sorry for being a sinner and repent for being a sinner. Do you feel guilty for being a sinner? If you do then there’s just one final step.
“that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.”Romans 10:9 KJV
all you have to do is tell God out loud with your mouth that you believe the gospel. You MUST mean it from your heart to work.
You can pray something like this
“dear God i repent as a sinner. i believe jesus is God, who died, buried, and ressurected, so his blood can wash away my sins. so i only trust in the blood alone to save me not my good works. Save me from hell in jesus name i pray amen”
@deimosok2003 change yourself for the better and you'll attract people into your life
@@deimosok2003 there's women into that. problem is they're fat too.
@@deimosok2003 u would be surprised, but kinda a lot of people lol
Bro i see a man in the outdoors on a fold out chair and I'm locked the f in
Dont forget the fog, locked tf in
@@ismaeljim94 great scenery
I'm psychologically conditioned from all of my campfire conversations.
The rule is to not be nice but to be good
Not good but strong
@@DondiWhiteRIPno, goodness is above strength by several rungs of the ladder...
@@H41030v3rki110ny0u in my values, yes. But not out in these streets
@@DondiWhiteRIP be strong enough to be gentle
being good did not get me anywhere.
Bro went to Windows XP background just to tell us The Truth
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣
😭😭😭
This is real wisdom. Been married for 14 years. I love my wife. That does not mean I just make her feel better all the time. That does not mean I do whatever she says. She often is mad at me. But, I learned she would HATE me if I did anything else. It’s a hard lonely job often. My biggest wish is that we men can see, respect, and support this in each other. We need brothers.
Man am not sure but i kind of sounds like a plan, good job.@@garrettbryan2717
Each time a woman says something just go and do the opposite.
Conversely, be the best and most authentic version of yourself. If anyone, irrespective of gender can’t appreciate this, they aren’t worth your time.
You can not be a good man without the potential of being a bad one.
I think I lack that bad one...
Facts
Harmless=/=good
Yeah, otherwise you're just delusional
@@abdulquadiransari7476 take an ideal father figure as an example. He has to be strong and protective, sometimes being stubborn and fierceful, so everything is in place. You have to command respect, sometimes you have to not be good but righteous, and that requires some sacrifices, especially in the eyes of your loved ones.
It’s not about saying no to her, it’s about thinking rationally of situation and deciding if the situation is good for both of you or not - this is building stability and trust into man.
That rationality is harsh sometimes. I was head over heels in love with my ex, but we were too different. We were arguing and I called out the reality of our situation. Hardest thing I did but the decision I’m proud of making.
@MrMcManDude literally me today wtf...
Nah, it’s about saying no.. 😂 don’t be delusional, if you don’t like something, tell her you don’t like it. If her response isn’t an apology and her never doing it again, dump her, or continue to be a simp
@@Antonnn1111 thats precisely what I did, I dumped her lmao
I fucked up my relationship by not showing my true intentions during the most important part with her, an intimate moment, and i greatly regret not telling what i wanted.
What?
You just made your life easier and happier even if you don’t think so right now
@armandoguerra7658 Easier, maybe, happier not really. It feels like the biggest mistake I've made, and it's a single youtube comment condensed for ease of understanding for..some folks, i guess. It's just that a lot has happened for my ex-girlfriend in her past, and i tried to be the "one" for her. Rookie mistake, and yeah, my mind was too far in the clouds as well, since it was my first time that i had a gf. I've learned, but the cost was high for me personally.
Sorry for the long ass text, btw lol
@@jackdaw3822 don’t worry man, You could have wrote 4 more paragraphs and I would have read it and responded anyway.
One of the few useful tips my father told me was that my first girlfriend wouldn’t last, and I got very angry, and got me railed up against him, but then, with the years I understood what he was trying to say, it is because I wasn’t ready, and neither was she, baggage comes in a lot of ways and shapes, and due to the fact that this might be hell, I would take it as easy as I could.
I got more girlfriends and took betrayals you couldn’t imagine, and I’ve learned that what I want, and what exist, might not coincide in reality, and that’s okey, protect your divine spark, and try to be the best version of you, not for others sake, but for yours. Most people want to take the pain that was inflicted upon them onto others, don’t be like them, take the hit and learn from it. I myself let a woman take advantage of me because I wanted to be loved so bad, and I took that lesson, unfortunately, this is what this world is, punishment with some goodness sprinkled on the top.
@@jackdaw3822 I gave you a lengthy response that seems to have been deleted, either way, don’t punish yourself too much, this world will already do that to you.
Not gonna lie, listened to the first 2 minutes and read the comments and I already feel wiser.
That’s the money move! I always check the comments either before or early to get a feel for what people think about what was presented
just went thru a relationship and came to realize that first lesson, it’s crazy how after experiencing that i can reflect on each time i bended my will when i could have managed the situation differently
Same, and I knew what I was doing but she would wear me down until I said yes
this man speaks the truth. I had this problem with my now wife. Our relationship was a mess for a while. Since I've found my frame she's never been more attracted to me. For anyone that thinks this won't work women, give it a try, you'll be surprised at the results.
ur comment gives me hope. What do u think is the most prevalent part of ur effort that made her more attracted to you?
wym by finding your “frame”
@@mobmusik9209be urself prolly
This man has great point but also is proyecting his experiencies like if it were the only truth, listen to this man but also remember that every relationship is different everyone has their unique way they like to be treated, this are great pointers but ultimatly you have to learn the way to treat your partner
Exactly this. But I think he is a good man for also saying that his way is not the only one. Too many people fall into simplistic thinking styles (me included) which means we can only give advice from the perspective that we have.
@weekasi1 totally, I agree with you, also its good to talk or hear about this things, I feel like its easy to forget this type of things
Absolutely spot on it gets really tiresome listening to people talk about relationships and life so mechanically. For me atleast, girls are just people like us at the end of the day and no one wants to be in a relationship with a suck up.
But yea he does have some good wisdom.
Yeah, I cringe a little when I hear people on youtube saying “women want x”
I’d like to add that sometimes there is no “right” answer. Sometimes it comes down to you deciding which decision will result in little to zero resentment.
You’re right, there is no “right answer” there’s only what you believe you should do. Listen to your gut
If you are unapologetically yourself & she RESPECTS you as you are you won, if you can’t be yourself around her & you have to act like something your not you lost
your ego is calling it bad, cus of societal expectations and the expectations ur parents threw on you when u were a kid. but in reality it´s just authenticity and being who u really are deep down inside
Well said
Yes, the title is bad, the video is good.
@@dylanl6445tilting youtube videos isn’t reflective of the video or the creator more so a reflection on the algorithm
Not everyone is the same.
I want to agree with you
When I was younger, my parents did put a lot of expectations on me to do Good
But when they split
Something changed
And I had to raise my siblings.
There’s so many things I’d like to talk about
But Not enough time
Thank you so much for ruining this
5:14 Yeah I think a lot of us men fold under the pressure of that initial negative reaction. All we want is to make our gfs happy so it’s easy to become this yes man. All I heard as a kid was “happy wife, happy life” but those 4 words don’t tell the whole story at all. Thank you for this video
What about someone who has never had a relationship with a woman?
I am currently 20 years old…
I know I’m still young…
But I’m very tired of going to bed and seeing nobody next to me.
But
My parents split when I was young
So the only love I was ever taught is now tarnished .
I'm at my lowest right now.
I wish i could have know this way before. This help so much more than trying to talk to my own father or mother.
This video made my day, thank you.
Seeing this after a mutual breakup agreement. Ive been binge watching a lot of psychology videos these past days, i learned alot from it. But you, the way you delivered the message, and your vibes. Immaculate, fkg legend. PREACH
It took me many years living with a woman to learn this on my own. Save yourself the time and listen to this man. He speaks truth.
Learning to be honest and upfront with my intentions and desire has been the best change in my life. I finally feel like my authentic self and not a walker in my skin.
That's awesome
bro thank you. It's same issue I get burnt out in college and soon depressed, I couldn't say no to my superiors and friends rightly enough
I always say, "The more a woman complains about you, the more she likes you". Dude's right tho. It's not about being an "asshole". Being a "bad" guy simply means that you don't yield or cave when you believe the course of action is best to progress/improve your or the relationship's situation. In other words, stay on YOUR course, put YOUR purpose first ALWAYS and she will either get onboard or not
You are a very intelligent person, man. I find it very hard to find people giving good, reasonable advice on apps like these as time progresses. You hit the nail on the head though
My girl I have been dating for 4 months now, she recently did some small things that made me wonder if I can really trust her. Whenever something like that came up, I would go over to her house the same day, we would lie down in bed and talk it out. She tends to think a little too optimistic sometimes, like a dude texted her frequently and she was being nice to him. To me, it was so obvious that he wanted something from her but in her opinion it was fine to just not answer frequently, instead of telling him that she is happily with me. By now, she did tell him and he also told her that it is unacceptable to be this nice to him and almost flirty from a guys point of view when she is commited to me. Chances are, if she is a genuinely good girl and she does some inappropriate stuff, she just needs to learn how to behave in a relationship, and thats okay. Its her first relationship and she is a quiet good girl. You can tell her what you expect from her. If you do, she will adapt. If you dont, you will start to build resentment and the relationship breaks apart.
Also: When women say that men should be more sensitive, loving, emotional and all of that. They dont talk about all men. They talk about the men that they perceive and see in the world. The top 20% in terms of attractiveness, who tend to be rather bad. THEY are supposed to be more good so that they become more balanced in terms of good and bad. Most guys dont understand this and although they are already good, they hear that, try to be even more "good" and then wonder why they dont score high with women. Being a total nice guy.
Just dont be overly bad nor good. If you are German, check out Peter Frahm who is a good coach if you want to become such a man.
Sounds like you discussed it like a man, as you should. I would also have just suggested to her that if she can't behave in a way that is conducive to your values over the long haul, then the whole relationship you two have may just be better suited as a casual, "not serious" thing. If she's super into you, she'll hate the idea and snap into shape. And you are setting boundaries. Sometimes a masculine guiding hand is all they need to act right. Good luck buddy!
Bro if she is doing that, i am not sure if she is atracted to you anymore
@@mhill88ify Yeah, she was shocked when I indicated that I would walk away if there was something going on with that guy. She probably didnt expect that this behavior was that bad, but thats why you gotta lead her. She was absolutely in shock and legitimately had a panic attack after our calm argument. And we talked about it twice on seperate days, and she accepted that she made a mistake, especially after the guy also told her that it is not acceptable to be with someone and text stuff like "I find you funny too".
But I am 99,9% sure she is committed to me, we've been dating for over 4 months now. She has told me that she has strong feelings for me too but that she can have issues on the spot to communicate that through words. We will see, this Friday I'll address the topic of going into a relationship. I am 99% sure she will say yes, we even had sex twice although she has a traumatic past with that, as well as making out although she also has a traumatic past with that. I am sure she feels very safe with me and there are no big red flags (after my first relationship, I am very concious about them :D )
Right.
From experience just make it clear the intention to set boundaries is for the better of both of you in the relationship she’ll respect that.
The right woman will see it “for the better” the wrong woman will see it as “controlling”
If shes not willing to commit to your boundaries respectfully walk away ..
If she opened her mouth - she’s probably lying.
This video helped show me that I really wasn’t the problem in my previous relationship thank you.
Genuine and real solid advice. My girl and I are happy because we both question everything and work through it all, but saying no is still helpful advice. I learned boundaries are super important, and having your own life is important too, for respect. Don’t make yourself a doormat, be polite though. This guy knows what he’s talking about. Thanks for actually having these real discussions. And if you don’t have haters, you’re doin something wrong. Cliche but true 🔥
💯
I can't get it honestly. "If you have no haters then you're doing something wrong". So if in my social circles (obviously those people I spend all the time with) I don't make anyone angry just because they saw me (one of characteristics of hate in my book), if I don't make anyone experience negative emotions, then I'm doing something wrong, huh? How is this even true? I'm not a doormat, I and my friends have different arguments sometimes, but no one hates anyone else. Everyone respects everyone else in my social circles, so we don't have a problem with saying 'no', with rejecting or changing plans and so on.
Maybe it's language barrier though, because in my native language "hate" is a very strong word, it's usually used in meaning of extreme displeasure and anger, so extreme that one wouldn't want the object of their hate to exist at all (can be applied to anything, people as well)
So please explain it to me, I would really appreciate an answer for this one.
@ maybe it’s not like “you need haters who really hate you” but you should have people critiquing you and pointing out where you’re slipping. If it’s all roses and butterflies, something is wrong or missing. There should be other people out there who will likely disagree with you or your beliefs or methods and that’s okay, you should still do you because you’re not doing things for others. Do them for yourself or for the greater good. Utilitarian, kinda, but also don’t be afraid to be your honest self, show your darker shadowy side some, or express it in some form or other. Just be yourself, do you and disregard how others might judge you. If your friends like you that’s fine of course, but someone out there can disagree with you or your beliefs and that’s fine.
But also true, in English, words that are often used like “hater” get watered down. The more it’s used, the less it means the same. And haters don’t necessarily mean someone with a super strong hate, but a sort of strong dislike I guess 😅
@@Ganonduff ah, yeah, it makes much more sense now, thank you! Seems like the original phrase just uses very strong words, having much more complex meaning underneath. Thanks!
Omg YESSSS!!! No fence but I’ve learned little from this video but that’s not because you’re wrong. It’s because it’s exactly my approach to life and relationships. I often get called selfish for this approach but I strongly believe that it’s not selfishness but rather knowing your worth. Knowing what and who you need in your life. I will say things straight. Often early in a relationship. If they can’t take it then why waste time. The values and lifestyles have to align or at least not be interfering with each other
Thanks mate, that video is already a big help to many. Clear message and on point 👊
This makes me so upset. I started like this, & I tried to change to who I thought she wanted & as I change, things got worse so I was breaking my back & becoming someone who I wasn’t & eventually I was being disrespected & treated so unfairly & ate that $#!? Thinking it was for the best. This, this was the reset I needed to reassure me that my true self was always the way to be
This was a breath of fresh air and a well needed reminder. Thank you.
Love the dreamy effect, the bloom is magical
She asked me how I felt about her, I told her the truth, she left. I hope she comes back, but theres nothing I can do within my rights to convince her, except keep being what made her like me in the first place.
You told her the truth. You can change how u truly feel
today i had to be the "bad" man. I had to tell my partner that I didn't want her hanging out with or being around her guy friends because it made me feel like crap. She complained and it made her feel terrible deep down. I had to try so hard to not give the boundary more leniency out of feeling bad for her. I knew that if i had let this go on that it would end up hurting us more in the long run. Then i come home to seeing this video on my page. Thanks so much for the advice Bene Ri!
Something I also went through recently. I was torn up inside because she spent so much time alone with a male friend but who was I to speak out, one of my best friends is female albeit only hanging out with me a few times a year since we live far apart. It’s a tough situation, to rationalize gender in relationships or to believe innate nature.
Wow it must've hurt her so bad that she couldn't keep her options open and cheat. How do you even "feel bad" for someone like this? Disgusting.
This is actually weird and not an actual boundary. Maybe work on your own self esteem instead of this lol
@@MrSqueamishJam translation: im a cuck
@ it was more detailed than that but I’m not gonna put it all in one RUclips comment
Quality authentic, unartificial and indeed no-bullshit content, thanks man
guys... being good for just the sake of bit is the hole idea, not to achieve something or get something back, thats a rabbit hole my friends, and again always take what fits u right, and keep an open mind with strong sense of self, so u dont repeat other peoples ideas, and instead create your own.
P.D. nice video my man! love ur reflexions.
You invite her into your world, not vice versa. If she wants in, good. If she doesn’t align with your world, see if she’d change. If yes, good. If not, move on.
Damn bro, this showed up at the best time. My Wife and I have a strong relationship but in recent months we have been still close but she has lost trust in me. I basically trust in her judgement about things and often go against my own instincts and let her call the shots on many things. Our sex life dropped off more recently and she told me she doesn't trust my leadership anymore. Then this video came across my feed 2 days later. I needed to hear this, thank you.
These aren’t traits of a bad man, these are traits of a good leader
It’s so hard right now. I’m trying to talk to someone, trying beaucase it’s so hard to forget the past. In 10 years that past, will be a great story but right now, in the present, there’s just fear.
But I’m not giving up, she seems so Nice. I Hope someone understands me ❤
Speaking from experience, there are a lot of young men out there in need of personal conversations with men that have healed perceptions of women and appropriate relationships with them (sisters, mothers, girlfriends/wives)
Wow you made me realize I am weak. I'm not sure I've been making my own decisions. I need to find out who I am and what I want.
This video is an exact mimic of No more Mr Nice Guy to the tee and the story you told was in the book as well.
Be good, but ruthless when necessary! 😎
Powerful video. It's not the fact that doing these things you say would actually be "bad".
But rather, when you are afraid to live authentically as yourself, you see it as bad in some way. Otherwise you'd be doing it. You must take the plunge to do the "bad" thing and be more honest and real, and trust that you will be able to realise that it's actually a good choice so long as what you do is appropriate. I like this message. I'm an anxious person who has been growing, healing, learning and unlearning. I am beginning to live my truth, so this video found me at a great time to push me to keep it up. Thank you for this 💪🏻
So true. My relationship is reaching 8 years next January and I can tell you every aspect of what bro said is absolutely true in this video.
“Brother live your truth!” Is so powerful 🙏
Awesome points man. You really opened my eyes a lot. I’ve recently gotten out of a toxic relationship and fuck me I realise now it was more 50/50 than I want to admit.
Definitely a lot of stuff in here I was lacking on and blaming her for reacting the her DNA is telling her too.
Ps: I’m not excusing her for what she’s done but I know now I can’t excuse myself anymore
I watched one of your videos about 6 months ago after going through a break up and you said something along the lines of isn’t it weird how a guy always ends up with the crazy/depressed girl maybe it’s the guy it changed my life thank you man
I understand it now.
😂😂
Had no idea how much I needed to hear this. Thank you brother
RUclips recommended me you for some reason and I like it. I like your voice, dude, and your speech, like a friend to a friend.
Anyway, I've watched the first two points and I want to disagree with the way you call it "bad". Being honest, sincere and open is not bad. Being vulnerable acknowledging you can't be there for her or that you don't like something is a virtue, not a weakness or "being a jerk". We, men, are taught to be independant and dependant, always be strong and reliable, but with all honesty, all of us have fears, weaknesses, moments of vulnerability, and it's totally normal. And not being afraid of your own vulnerabilities in presense of a person you trust the most of all is a great way to become even closer. This way this person understands you better and emphasizes you better. "Being vulnerable" might be considered "being bad" for men, so in that regard the way you put it is actually logical.
I am not in position to argue or tell you you are wrong because you are not. I just wanted to give an alternative point of view on the points you've discusses in the video. Thank you for your perspective and for sharing your life experience! Wish you all the good in life!
if you've been a good person in order to get something back, you've never been a good person in the first place
it must be wild living in a purely black and white world with no nuance
this is unfortunately what i needed to hear. i need to find myself.
Respect from Central America dawg great videos
I hid my true values and beliefs until I couldn’t take it anymore I should’ve just been upfront
this is my first video but i can see im gonna love you as a content creator keep up the good work man!🙏🏾
I’ve known this for a while, but i was 4 years into a relationship with my girlfriend and got too comfortable and let my guard down thinking we would last forever. Recently just broken up and looking back I’m realising I was too nice towards the end of the relationship
Dang this is too accurate brother 😢
AMAZING ADVICES, THANK YOU SO MUUUUUCH, YOU ARE AMAZING
I relate a bit to this video, stay strong kings 👑 🦍
Yeah learned this the hard way. Started speaking my mind now I'm happy with my woman.
I thought I was being nice and polite, when I asked what she wanted to eat for dinner every time. Little did I know I was pushing her away every time I asked that.
Great advice man. Thank you.
You are the real deal.
Coming from experience and as someone who is studying psychology as a major I can say this is some genuinely stellar advice. Some people may watch this video and think that he is swaying more towards an “alpha male mindset”, but this simply isn’t the case here.
I really need some good advice. I was dating someone a while ago, and while it didnt work out and I for the most part got over it, I realized I messed it up in some ways by being “too nice”. I should have said what I really thought more. Though we werent that compatible, I still feel like things could’ve been different. I want to move on but I can’t forgive myself for these mistakes. I dont know why, I just can’t accept that I messed up.
With relationships I feel like its different than most things. If you mess it up once, there aren’t good odds that you’ll get a second chance. Just want some advice if anyone has it. I want to stop thinking about this, its honestly driving me crazy and draining me mentally. Maybe the solution is to stop thinking and focus on moving on
What I got from this is that he is telling me to be myself better my self love my self just be who I am. I download this video and you 🫵🏾should do the same and listen this again and again just like me.
Commenting to keep long term relationship strategy on my fyp
Honestly I'm gonna give my two cents as well and just say that I never got more attention and attraction from ladies until I just started being who I am. No sugarcoating all the little BS. I am what I am and that's just what it is. I was gonna say we need more voices out here preaching this but I've heard it since I was a wee lad that "all you gotta do is be yourself" and I haven't truly rationalized that understood what it meant until recently. Just be you for you and someone will come along the way who is genuinely attracted to YOU. Ain't that what we all generally want for the most part y'all?
I am about to become a very,. very bad man.
Is it weird that this happened to me but in the opposite way? She just agrees for everything even when it is obvious that she doesn't want that
This has impacted my attraction for her, she just isn't her own person her own self she just wants to do everything for me and it also obviously hurts her
I don't think that's weird. Confidence is sexy in women and it's a form of confidence to be able to voice her displeasure of an idea. Like the guy in the video said, if you feel she will say yes to everything it devalues it. If she said no to some things unapologetically, it means that when she says yes you know that you're attractive enough or have earned the yes, rather than it simply being symptomatic of a person being manipulatable and scared. If you liked that, it might mean you enjoy controlling her and are a nasty person. But you don't like it. You want your woman to be stronger. Happier.
Also, if you can push her around, perhaps instinctually you know on a subconscious level that if you have kids with her she will give in to their requests at the detriment of the development of discipline, which isn't a good thing for the child.
you are complaining about having a gold mine
@@Aquilinum That is still fucked up all the same.
I should've seen this when it came out. If I'd have seen it then I would probably still be with the woman I loved. I placed her and her wants in front of myself and disappeared myself. We had the connection, the sexual drive and everything. I'm broken at the moment but working on myself.
I wholly agree with what is being said in this video. But I'd like to add something here based on my own experiences:
Your past relationships might show signs of this dynamic he's describing here. There might even be instances where you can directly deduce that you could've acted "better" - just like the video is saying. And there's often great lessons to learn here.
But don't underestimate the unique dynamics and personality of your (ex) partner. This might sound a bit controversial but there's a considerable amount of women in today's society that aren't in touch with their feminine side either. Meaning- just like we as men ought to be in touch with our true masculine selves, a girlfriend ought to be in touch with her feminine.
Some girls aren't. They switch back and forth. They don't reveal their full feminine side. Maybe due to trauma, maybe due to their upbringing, friends, family- either way, as long as she's not playing her part, it'll always prove difficult to pursue what he's describing in this video. A woman that is unwilling to lean into her feminine will continously contest your masculine. She'll wear you down and make you smaller and weaker, unbeknownst to you for the longest time.
I urge you to be aware of this. It might super spiritual or smth but it's not that deep, just something to keep in mind. Not every girl will enable you to be in your masculine. And it's better to step back as a man and leave if that's the case. Because no matter how things might seem great from time to time, this will always catch up to you. And inevitably lead to a bad outcome eventually - whether that is a straight up breakup or just an unfullfilling relationship.
In order for you to be your best and true self, she must be her best and true self as well.
I needed to hear this. I'm gonna stop living by other people's opinion.
Dude. You’re a real one.
Not bad. True to your nature.
I needed this video before my girlfriend dumped me, now it's too late
This video is actually helpful for you to get a new gf. Keep the grind,champ 🏆
Great name
Pretty poetic that the fog cleared out by the end of the video
Thank you for this encouragement. I really need it
Thank you for the content, it’s good reflective content. One point that felt unsettling to me was about saying what you mean. I completely understand how bending one’s will to fit into what they think others want makes them untrustworthy. But what if you don’t have an opinion on something. I guess this made me feel like there’s a strange pressure to force that opinion, what would be an honest response in that stituation? because saying i don’t know feels like instability.
Try to communicate that you're thinking on it, then. Gives you time and is being truthful without too much uncertainty
you answered ur own question. if someone asks you about something you dont have an opinion on. SAY THAT
“i dont have an opinion on this”
@@shift-fast You're right, 2 days later when I look at it, it makes so much sense. Thanks ☺
Being “good” is a construct. Being yourself is authentic.
Ffs just be authentic and show up.
This video really hit home thank you brother.
Great video man, as a woman may I just say that your words apply to both females and males equally, as we all have masculine and feminine energies. ❤
True, but that doesn't mean you embrace your masculine energy thats unattractive many men will agree with that.
Sure, there are times when a man becomes little feminine and a women becomes little masculine mostly when the times are hard
But, most of the time it shouldn't be like this if you want that feminine masculine dynamic in the relationship.
I am just trying to say if you're a female embrace your feminine side as much as possible and use your masculine side only when needed (for ex: your man goes off track or is going in a degenerate way)
@@Om_B did you not take the video's message to heart? Be your authentic self so you get the person who is right for you, unapologetically. It may be unattractive to many men, but she's not going for many men is she?
A partner is going to live with you and be there so much of the time that you are going to suffer if you can't be yourself around them. On top of that if they cannot accept who you are and like to be, they are not the right one for you.
@@squirrel670 yeah you can look it in that way too
@@Om_B That's the main way to look at it, the most important part! People are most fit to find a partner who is fit for them when they can be themselves as much as possible.
@@squirrel670 i get you 👍
Great video, it shares points from the superior man book
thanks for the advice
You were at a beautiful place while recording this video
God looked down from heaven to see if there were some who were good, there were none.
what if you're in a relationship with a woman who complains that you never lead her, but anytime you take the lead she ALWAYS complains and says you did it wrong or you're "incapable" of leading?
anytime you try to make peace for her or do something nice for her you're met with criticism about how it isnt right.
What if you're trying so hard to do right but its NEVER good enough, no matter how much effort and thought was put in?
imagine waking up everyday and knowing you're never going to make her happy no matter how hard you try, but you still try only to be met with comments about "if you wanted to you would" or "you just dont care about me"
what if you are only intimate 1-2X a month and then you try to caringly tell your feelings about how you are feeling undesired, unloved and you miss that intimacy and then she tells you your views about sex are disgusting and youre delusional?
fellas i need help. i dont know what to do anymore and after 8 years i dont feel loved, appreciated, accepted or desired anymore.
im really thinking about jumping ship but i dont know what to do anymore.
This channel, Corey Wayne, and Orion Taraban. Good luck, sir.
Great job with putting yourself out there and asking for help Gary! I don't read comments often so you're lucky I saw this but you could message me on Instagram (instagram.com/bene_ri_) or send me an email at beneri.yt@gmail.com so I can help you out ✌🏼
Hey Gary - I say leave her. The comments above didn’t give any advice - you should leave her brother. Work on yourself, be single for a bit. Practice abstinence/continence and live a healthy lifestyle and put yourself out there to attract someone you deserve. They say you attract what you are. Be the best version of you and let someone else deal with this girl.. I know it’s hard but when a girl acts like how you say she’s acting, she already knows and has decided that she’s not attracted to you anymore. Which happens to all guys. Girls can be unpredictable but its not a bad thing if something that makes you unhappy or seems like its not going to work out ends. Let it end
Biggest question: do you have kids?
Yes! Corey Wayne all the way! I've been following his work for 5 years. I haven't checked out that other person though so I'll see what that's all about@@margaretc5679
I needed those words. thank you.
Your advice is priceless...
You might be absolutely right.
Respect to you for making this video 🙏
This video was all I needed thankyou
Great Video, thanks
being good and being nice are NOT the same thing
Funny enough I was being myself, when I was trying to date this girl I liked. She ended up thinking I was lying, or had bad intentions, or gas lighted her into things. I legit liked her. I guess I wasn't toxic enough or wasn't like her boyfriend's. Anyways I've dodge a bullet.
I don't have a girlfriend yet but I appreciate this advice a lot.
Also, the background is fucking amazing.
This is a gold video