Our relationship as a cis gay man and a trans person

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  • Опубликовано: 20 окт 2024
  • Boyfriend reveal!
    Hey guys, thanks for watching this video. I asked you on IG @kovukingsrd whether you wanted the uncut (wink) version or an edited version, and you guys wanted the loong one. So here it is! You can hear the rain and some thunder in the background, hope that adds a chill vibe and isn’t too disturbing :P
    Thanks to my bf @keywey102 (on IG) for being in this video with me! You guys have been asking to meet Kai for a while so here he is. We have gotten a lot of questions about our relationship as a trans x cis mlm couple and we thought we’d answer them (and discuss the topic and our experiences as a whole!).
    Thank you for watching. Please leave a comment if you can connect with any of this, if you find something interesting, have any further questions etc, and we’ll try to get back to you x
    Lots of love,
    Kovu and Kai

Комментарии • 102

  • @wy0min9
    @wy0min9 4 месяца назад +85

    a lot of people think that trans people can only be in t4t (trans + trans) relationships, but as a trans guy who's been with a queer cis guy for 4.5 years, you can definitely understand each other without needing to be t4t! labels are labels, but people are people. labels are just words and all that matters is that you love each other and communicate. (ex. being with a trans person doesn't mean a cis gay man isn't gay anymore!) lovely video as always, i've been watching your videos for longer than i could remember

    • @minamii8575
      @minamii8575 4 месяца назад +9

      as a transmasc, i've only been exclusively t4t because i'd feel incredibly guilty if i was with a cis dude. i know i'm not deceiving anybody but idk why i feel like they're better off with a cis guy than me.

    • @xeganxerxes4319
      @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад

      You can’t change sex.

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +17

      @@minamii8575 Reading this broke my heart. It is exactly how I felt when I found my boyfriend- I fell for him so hard, but felt like he’d be better off with anyone but me because I’m trans. Thankfully he was adamant on making me feel loved and worthy as I am, and to see the beauty in myself that he sees in me. I truly hope you are able to see that within you one day too. Sending all my love and best wishes❤

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +11

      It always means so much to me to hear from other people in the same situation- I remember how alone I felt with it, thank you so much for sharing❤️ and exactly! Labels are just made up categories, love doesn’t always fit into a box, sometimes it goes beyond them and I think that can be even more beautiful🥰 wishing lots of love and happiness for you and your darling x

    • @theboxygenie
      @theboxygenie Месяц назад

      Most people offline do not hold that opinion.

  • @waytoobiased
    @waytoobiased 4 месяца назад +41

    congrats on being openly Norwegian!

  • @ecowo57
    @ecowo57 4 месяца назад +64

    your boyfriend seems so nice, I'm so happy you've found each other

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +4

      Thank you so much 🥹🥹

  • @boyghcst
    @boyghcst 4 месяца назад +6

    Awh your partner is so down to earth and really open! Really heartwarming to hear yous both talk about these things. I’ve had a lot of transphobia from other gay guys on dating apps so idk, it’s nice to hear there are people out there who aren’t dicks 😅

  • @Meeko4eve39
    @Meeko4eve39 4 месяца назад +15

    You two seem really well attuned to each other, which is very darling and lovely to see. I am happy for you both :) And I think you both embody the meme/phrase "Find someone who looks at you the way [insert person] does" in the best possible way. Both of you look at the other with so much care and attention. It's really sweet :)
    Now, I myself may be an aroace. But I'm still commenting for the algorithm because as Kovu said in the beginning there certainly is a need for people in similar situations (or who might find themselves in a similar situation soon-ish) to find positive representation. And even outside of the whole cis and trans thing I also think that the internet in general could use representation of couples like you who showcase such loving, caring, attentive and respectful (though still also calm & straightforward) conduct with each other,

    • @Tellyouwhat777
      @Tellyouwhat777 4 месяца назад +5

      This is such a sweet and wholesome comment!

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +4

      Thank you SO MUCH for these incredibly kind words🥺 I’ll admit, I’m always so fascinated to hear how other people perceive how I (/we) come across, I think it’s something about not being able to see myself from an outside perspective, and the curiosity that follows :P So hearing us described with so much care and love means so much to me. And thank you so much for what you said about not being able to relate, but commenting anyway to boost this video because you think the representation is important. I love when people of different underrepresented groups can wish each other well and support each other, so truly thank you❤️

  • @adris432
    @adris432 4 месяца назад +12

    Omg, I've just noticed Kai's cup. 🤣Love it.
    On another note, I really appreciate this video and the conversation. I feel like so many of us have similar worries and fears inside our minds...and hearing them voiced and deconstructed by somebody else out loud is just so...relieving? Cathartic? Kai seems lovely. And, obviously, you are too!

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +4

      Thank you so much for this. I always seek out people’s feelings and thoughts on situations they’re going through that are the same as mine. However with this specific topic the resources have been sparse, so I am overjoyed that we could be that for someone else❤ you’re definitely not alone!
      Also, yes, he’s very proud of that cup😆 in my most unbiased opinion (if that’s even possible) he is indeed lovely- and thank you x

  • @ndelaney8826
    @ndelaney8826 4 месяца назад +4

    Kovu popping up on my feed after like 5 years?? wild & very appreciated

  • @taylorp.-zm7hu
    @taylorp.-zm7hu 4 месяца назад +7

    17:00 What you said about projection is so relatable. I'm not in a romantic relationship, nor have I ever been, but I do the same thing with friends, the more I care about them and their opinions of me, the worse it gets. And I've been aware of this and was able to articulate it before and also felt guilty about it, but I could never really get myself to stop. I feel like hearing it from someone else helps though, for whatever reason. So thanks for that :)

  • @ChestersonJack
    @ChestersonJack 4 месяца назад +12

    This was recommended to me randomly on my feed, and I’m glad it was. I’ve never dated anyone at 22, not casually or serious or anything, and sometimes I worry I never will because of a multitude of factors, a couple of which relate to my gender. Hearing these experiences helps a lot.

  • @samryan8938
    @samryan8938 4 месяца назад +2

    A lot of your former/current thoughts really resonate with me as a trans guy. Thanks so much for making this video- it’s so honest and genuine to the core!

  • @richardforrest8134
    @richardforrest8134 4 месяца назад +35

    Hi Kovu I love your videos even after all these years I still go back at watch your old videos. also you two are a really cute couple

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +5

      That’s so sweet, thank you for sticking around🥰

  • @badger.acid_
    @badger.acid_ 4 месяца назад +13

    This was really nice thank you for talking about it! Me and my partner are t4t, but they are trans fem with little to no dysphoria, and im trans masc with a lot of dysphoria, and we have had pretty different experiences when it comes to dating and being intimate. But at the same time we appreciate each other's differences and we are able to be open about how we feel. When i first came out i didn't think i would find love at all, but that wasn't true, and seeing you two on instagram gave me so much hope that i would one day find the one. Me and my partner have only been together for 5 months but I really think they are the ONE. If you are thinking about making another video about being long distance that would be pretty cool, since we have to be long distance for a whole year now before maybe being able to move inn togheter after that, and i really miss them all the time so yeah if you have any tips on that please share them

    • @Bloody_Corpses
      @Bloody_Corpses 4 месяца назад

      I relate my partner is a trans woman but she has lots of bottom dysphoria (i had tons of bottom dysphoria before i had phallo) we are t4t and she is my first gf i had (my last relationship was a situationship) we are also both asexual and also long distance i enjoy reading other t4t stories :)

    • @Bloody_Corpses
      @Bloody_Corpses 4 месяца назад

      I have lots of dysphoria with my face and voice

  • @maccamusic17
    @maccamusic17 4 месяца назад +4

    I loved watching this video and seeing how you guys interact with each other, and as somebody who has been here watching your videos forever, it makes me really happy seeing you so happy Kovu. This is exactly the relationship you deserve. Somebody who treating so well! I hope you guys do more videos like this again some time!

  • @jannadark7611
    @jannadark7611 4 месяца назад +49

    Это так мило и круто. Немного больно видеть такую жизнь когда ты из россии - зависть берет. Но зато очень много узнаю и понимаю, что где-то такое больше в норме. Я верю, что когда-нибудь я и мои друзья сможем найти себе место и любовь. Спасибо за видео!

    • @lilagesprenkelt
      @lilagesprenkelt 4 месяца назад +8

      sending you so much love! ❤

    • @georgescharlesdantes
      @georgescharlesdantes 4 месяца назад +9

      Очень тебя понимаю на самом деле, желаю сил и понимания ✊🏻
      Каждый из нас заслуживает счастья

  • @shalacarter6658
    @shalacarter6658 4 месяца назад +18

    Hi Sweetie!
    Yayyyyyyyyy, a long video!
    Labels, labels. Getting kind of tired of labels. If you decide to identify as a Spotted Purple People Eater, you will still be my Kovu!

    • @Kovukingsrod
      @Kovukingsrod  4 месяца назад +16

      Bahaha thank you Shala!! I am so tired of them too - the words to describe our orientation and gender identity are just made up. We´re people who love other people

    • @shalacarter6658
      @shalacarter6658 4 месяца назад +2

      @@Kovukingsrod Agreed. I just started it. I need to go make some phone calls while offices are still open. Will come back to this later.
      Let Kai know that you are all in my nightly prayers.
      Miss you! xo

    • @barryledgister4496
      @barryledgister4496 4 месяца назад

      @@Kovukingsrod There, Kovu...you`ve admitted it, quote; ` the words to describe our orientation and gender identity are just made up.` Yes, non-binary, demigirl, genderfluid, agender, graysexual etc That`s all made up. The basic `male, female, straight, gay` are all based on biological, physical reality`, and the straight male and straight female keeps the human race going. It seems your fans may be slower in getting the message.

  • @lucam9806
    @lucam9806 4 месяца назад +8

    "When I grew up there was one gay guy and you know who that is" Very relatable

  • @lioly8282
    @lioly8282 4 месяца назад +3

    This conversation is so wonderful 💫

  • @nael_tm
    @nael_tm 4 месяца назад +2

    Very nice video!! Kai is so sweet and I wish more people didn't overthink that much who they are or what they like tbh. I think this video just reinforces the idea of that you just fall for a person and that everyone is different and therefore every relationship is different. It's so nice to see how close you two are and how much you know each other and care about each other and it shows that being gay or cis or trans or whatever isn't a big deal, if you get on with someone or if you love someone, you just get on with them or love them for who they are, as whole, and that's it. Thank you to both of you so much for this video, as I'm also a transmasc queer non binary person who's a bit scared of not finding a partner at some point of their life. Also, it's great it's long and you covered different topics.

    • @barryledgister4496
      @barryledgister4496 4 месяца назад +1

      Yes, but in many countries in the world, gay men can not be in a relationship. Lesbian women can not declare their love openly. Kovu and her straight relationship is totally outside of that, and is totally okay anywhere in the world, no matter how `butch` she thinks she looks (which she doesn`t, as she`s off the t and looks female now). Let`s forget about these dull pretenders and concentrate on the horrors awaiting gay men and lesbian women in Russia and Africa.

    • @Abi-kk4nl
      @Abi-kk4nl 4 месяца назад +1

      ​@@barryledgister4496thank youuu

  • @StoneBeing
    @StoneBeing 12 дней назад

    Thanks y’all. I relate so much to your “vibe” and it means so much. 🎉✨

  • @arkhamadness-5065
    @arkhamadness-5065 3 месяца назад

    I remember being 11 struggling with my feelings towards men watching your 100 ways to come out video time has flown by so much !

  • @lisje2496
    @lisje2496 4 месяца назад +2

    I am a fan of your boyfriend and just every word that comes out of his mouth! And you are so sweet together! Sending love from The Netherlands!

  • @lillyxd5343
    @lillyxd5343 4 месяца назад +1

    I could go on watching your video for hours. It’s so relaxing and wholesome ❤

  • @talaparis4372
    @talaparis4372 4 месяца назад +1

    Thank you for this video! It was really cute and beautiful to watch. 💙
    So happy for you both!

  • @APairOfOldSkoolVans
    @APairOfOldSkoolVans 4 месяца назад +3

    Damn Kovu’s really grown up!

  • @hahahalololol1767
    @hahahalololol1767 4 месяца назад +2

    Yesss kovu!!!! I would really love to hear about how u guys met😊 please make a video about thatt

  • @littlesailor1533
    @littlesailor1533 4 месяца назад +14

    My ex boyfriend was also a cis gay guy, honestly he is the person who made me feel the most validated ever :)

    • @Crow_feet
      @Crow_feet 4 месяца назад +5

      ​@@xeganxerxes4319dude they are a guy.
      If you have nothing nice to say don't say it

    • @xeganxerxes4319
      @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад +2

      @@Crow_feet They are not a guy. And I will always call out women identifying as gay men.

    • @skiakardia3966
      @skiakardia3966 4 месяца назад +1

      @@xeganxerxes4319 trans men are men, trans women are women. you're entitled to your opinion, but i'm also entitled to call you an idiot.

    • @_dazai_soukoku
      @_dazai_soukoku 4 месяца назад +6

      @@xeganxerxes4319playing god are we?

    • @xeganxerxes4319
      @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад +3

      @@_dazai_soukoku No, I’m just pointing out that the word gay has conventionally meant attracted to the same-sex and trans ideologues and proponents have redefined it for themselves. But not for me.

  • @b3rntk4r3
    @b3rntk4r3 4 месяца назад +5

    A cis guy named Kai? Oh wait, he's just from Sarpsborg :P

  • @Samsamsam6969
    @Samsamsam6969 4 месяца назад +3

    being in a cis/trans couple this is really nice to watch

  • @a-stark3
    @a-stark3 4 месяца назад +1

    i missed you 😭

  • @Phoenix.Sparkles
    @Phoenix.Sparkles 4 месяца назад +3

    This video is oddly relevant for me atm

  • @ecowo57
    @ecowo57 4 месяца назад +5

    - Thank you!
    - No welcome 🤬🤬🤬

    • @ecowo57
      @ecowo57 14 дней назад

      @@crazyorganist1609 omg did you google that word to look smart? lmao

  • @elixaaaaa
    @elixaaaaa 4 месяца назад +3

    i love love 🥰💌

  • @Ashikawahong
    @Ashikawahong 4 месяца назад +4

    Before watching this video randomly recommended to me by ALAL (the Almighty Algorithm), I want to complement you on that awesome Welsh prideflag! I love it ❤

  • @laxman4470
    @laxman4470 4 месяца назад +2

    Awesome!!!!

  • @OscarDirlwood
    @OscarDirlwood 3 месяца назад +1

    I like how people only discard Harry Potter now that its author has fallen out of political favour, as opposed to Harry Potter always being total shit.

  • @Bucket_full_of_Fandoms
    @Bucket_full_of_Fandoms 4 месяца назад

    Hi Kai!

  • @itissimplemo
    @itissimplemo 2 месяца назад

    Looooovely couple are you!!!

  • @user-ets
    @user-ets 4 месяца назад +2

    4:24 It sounds the same on Ukrainian 😭
    "Андрогін" :)

  • @adilvlogz1308
    @adilvlogz1308 14 дней назад

    Bruh having a boyfriend is kinda of gay

  • @neitiajatusrikos
    @neitiajatusrikos 4 месяца назад +10

    oh look a straight couple.

    • @ronja5315
      @ronja5315 4 месяца назад +3

      oh look, a complete idiot.

    • @xeganxerxes4319
      @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад +3

      I am a gay man and completely agree with you. The amount of sexist and homophobic nonsense this trans ideology has created is outrageous.

    • @Crow_feet
      @Crow_feet 4 месяца назад +3

      ​@@xeganxerxes4319oh look a trans phobe who's also a part of our community

    • @xeganxerxes4319
      @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад +2

      @@Crow_feet I’m not party of any community with trans people lmao

    • @landerlaurits
      @landerlaurits 4 месяца назад +8

      where?

  • @xeganxerxes4319
    @xeganxerxes4319 4 месяца назад +2

    Demon

  • @lighterlesscig
    @lighterlesscig 4 месяца назад +2

    im so glad ive rediscovered your channel on my home screen omg, i used to watch your videos all the time when i was like 12 and figuring out my gender and now im 18 and transitioning :p i hope you are well , thank you for helping me figure things out