Chris Williamson: Why Men & Women Are Giving Up On Love
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- Опубликовано: 12 апр 2023
- Where are we going wrong with dating? Chris Williamson reveals the stark truth behind why men and women are giving up on dating...
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📖 Chris Williamson has become one of the most followed podcasters, intellectual thinkers and researches in Europe. From a bullied and unpopular schoolboy to famous party boy appearing on some of the biggest reality shows, Chris Williamson was living the life most men in their twenties dream about, but he was deeply unsatisfied.
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Watch the full episode here 👉🏾ruclips.net/video/K2tGt2XWd9Q/видео.html
You forgot that most people are fat, why settle down with a fat partner long term. Rent, don't Buy. Just my opinion.
@OVYEDDeno❤
If women are so concerned with a partners socio-economic status then why do we have so many single mothers having babies with unsuccessful men. For many women money is never a factor in casual sexual encounters, it is all about physical attractiveness.
20 to 24 Years Old
Annual salary for men: $40,092
Annual salary for women: $36,712
Percent women make less than men: 8.43%
25 to 34 Years Old
Annual salary for men: $56,732
Annual salary for women: $49,660
Percent women make less than men: 12.47
SOMEONE IS LYING TO YOU!!!
Hyperglycemia? Don't you mean Hypergamy. What a bunch of nonsense. Thank you for your convoluted opinion. We need more feminist propaganda. It has as much veracity as rightwing pseudo-sciences like Evolutionary Psychology. Do you charge by the hour? @yogaofhealth1800
The lack of any relationship for years is a red flag for allot of women. Being in one is attractive. Once I got a girlfriend, other girls who ignored me suddenly were laughing and touching my arms. It was disturbing how they acted, knowing I was taken. As soon as I broke up, I become invisible again.
That's how it is. Every man experiences this. Even the waitress at restaurants trying to flirt with you.
It’s because they see you (or just a guy in a relationship) as have been screened by another woman as ‘good for a relationship’. It’s like how you need work experience to get work, a paradoxical logical framework.
Happened to me but in middle school and college lol
I guarantee it’s not that you were in a relationship per day but how you’re acting. Guys who are getting constant sex or attention from women are more relax. But ironically there is something as being too relax and smooth. There’s a balance
@@annnddyI would agree. Because that’s how u initially got the first girl. My basketball coach would say shoot the ball like u made it. Walk and talk like u have an abundance of options and u will.
I was ignored all my life by women who went after the “fun” irresponsible guys. I worked my ass off and built a company. Now when they see my success they run for me. Part of me can’t help but be disgusted by this.
Then ignore those same women. Go for the ones who have put in as much hard work as you have because they will most likely understand and appreciate your journey.
Find a simple girl. Keep it a secret how successful you are. If you want to marry her write up a good prenup and give her a lawyer to look at it with. Presto.
Now that women want (your money and lifestyle) you, go after the younger women. That's the best revenge. 😆
Oh snaps, you’ll find the one your looking for😊
@@Luna-luna909This. Exactly
1. no solutions were identified.
2. many other reasons have been ignored here.
Dating apps may have made meeting people easier but social media has completely destroyed healthy relationships. Comparison is the thief of joy and until we as a society get off social media these problems will continue.
I think #1 problem is people like to blame others for their own problems. In your case it's social media. In others it's men or women. In third case, it's police, people at work, parents, other life limitations... guys, on video posts like this, never say the reason I can't find a girlfriend is because I don't understand women or I am awkward or whatever. It's always someone else's fault.
100% agree. I deleted FB Instagram and Tinder and my life improved dramatically
@@Sabadiver Same here, I gave up social media a few years ago for Lent and within a week my life and my mental clarity was infinitely better. Never went back. One of the best decisions I’ve ever made.
One of the best decisions you could ever make!
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line ❤
When there’s too much choice we don’t choose at all.
Women are the "selecting sex" thats a biological fact. But as soon as 80% of women try to select only 20% of men, then the top guys are able to choose. Women are also much more likely to choose a spoken man than a single guy. So women create a polygamous society. They hate it themself, but they are unable to think rational. How should we, as men solve this, by telling them "oh, you are fine, you are right" ??! By the way, a degree deos not necessary mean that you are smart. The really important, heavy, dangerous and dirty work (except rising kids) is still disproportionately done by man...by the men who women don't respect. Thats the ugly truth.
For a lot of ordinary, decent men, there’s actually very little choice and for a small minority of top guys, a huge amount. For most women, the choice is also rather narrow, as they target those top 10% of men.
men does not have that amount of options
@@stonemarten1400 women have way more options than the average man. Look up the studies that show how many likes the average woman gets on sites like bumble and tinder etc. versus the average man.
pretty much it's as simple as that
It's easy to say get into a relationship, but dealing with toxic partners is another skill altogether.
I would argue that your ability to choose wisely and cut people out the moment you realise they are no good for you is a better skill to have. You don't have to deal with negativity at all then.
It's interesting some men said in RUclips videos that on the internet is a lot of negativity about genders,
yet in real life, he used to meet a lot of nice men and nice women, their girlfriends who don't even use Instagram.
This means the internet distorts reality because people who use social media less are much happier in real life and have healthy relationships.
Professor Sam Vaknin said in a video of the social dilemma of 2018, that Facebook doesn't want men to fall in love with their wives because it is the greatest threat to Facebook advertisements. They want men´s eyeballs looking at Facebook advertisements.
He says falling in love and intimacy is the ultimate addiction, which means it reduces the need for other addictions such as Facebook.
He says You are either on Facebook, or you have an intimate relationship.
Maybe start listening less podcasts, and do your own research in real life. because as you use the internet less
your happiness level increases, your focus increases, and your mindset changes.
When your mindset changes nd you practice empathy and gratitude, you attract the person who also has the same values.
But of course even the best youtubers may change their opinion.
Having open mind mena sthta you dont have the same opinion every day.
But listen mostly the podcasts about other hobbies suchs as sports, music science etc.
@VantaDark I cut them all. Nobody is good enough... What does it say about myself
?
nobody is inherently a good person, the concept of good and bad is an ilusion. and theres saying, never burn all your bridges XD so dont follow this guys advice. be critical and have a critieria for you believe is someone taking the piss then confront them, and if they dont have any sign of acknowledgement of what they have done. basicaly not accountability. then you walk away. you be able to have fiends that arent cabron copies of yourself. thats veryu quick way to get into an echo chamber. which will ruin your life over a long period of time
@@VantaDark
You don't 'deal' with a toxic woman, you stay away from her in the first place.
The amount of unhealthy shit we have actively embraced within our society is extremely alarming and most people don't fully appreciate the situation because we've sleepwalked into it gradually. What is needed is for individuals to wake up and work on themselves. If enough do it we can heal as a society and turn things around.
Agreed.
Yes, pick yourselves up by your boot straps. That will fix a broken community.
I have said it, they have said it too, and I will say it again. Marry someone based on "set principals and values", this sounds like homework and boring factor but it guarantees much better chance of life long and successful partnership. I
The worst way to get married is when you marry based on extreme infatuation (ignoring all other factors), after having great sex for couple of weeks, you seems to have great connection with this new person (thinking that alone will suffice) etc. .
You should be we to talk about, childern, finance, religious beliefs and all boring stuff before hand because marriage is boring and will get boring. You take care of this then you will have successful partnership in marriage.
Excellent advice. When times get rough you can draw upon the same background.@@letsthinkbriefly3761
You guys should be like this centuries ago, but hey better late than never now most things have gone to $h*t!!
Selfishness is the problem today across the board. No one is willing to sacrifice anything at all for anyone or anything. They are not willing to put someone else ahead of themselves. Marriage requires sacrifice and selflessness.
Quietly dead on. This is it.
I am selfish. I see no value in sacrificing my life, finances or time.
This is true. Problem is so many women sacrifice their marriages itself over nothing. Which in turn makes men not want to get married to protect themselves.
that's too fleetingly general a point to be even called an 'analysis'. of cause you may hold to it and continue looking onto the irrepairable desaster, baffled.
I think many women feel they are sick of sacrificing. Their time, their health, their pride and their bodies. Just sick of it. Studies show they are happier, healthier and richer when they opt out of marriage and kids.
So... as a boy I learned my trade. She ignored me. Experience took time. She ignored me. I got really quite good. She ignored me. I converted experience, knowledge, hard work, a fair degree of talent, connections, communications and a not inconsequential amount of danger and rough working conditions into really quite a good position. After all that I am supposed to accept she is now primarily interested in a robotic cash dispenser? If a friend behaved as an unrealistic disloyal parasite would you even continue the charard of the friendship.... who on earth would logically entertain the odds of finding anyone worth caring for against these odds?
Exactly! Very well said!
Are you talking about one specific woman? People get rejected time to time. Not everyone will be interested in you and that's OK.
Women get rejected too. Its not only you buddy😂
@@natalia_00123 right?! We all want someone that we cant have but c mon, he s bitter lol😂
The problem is that a woman interested in money wont care for you if you became ill. She will leave you abandoned to your fate. The same if you get fired or have an accident
It's extraordinary that there are still people who'll tell themselves that what he is saying is not happening. It's almost comical, if it wasn't so tragic
lol women.
They’re in denial.
It's called a "cope"
Why are they harassing women so much?
It's interesting some men said in RUclips videos that on the internet is a lot of negativity about genders,
yet in real life, he used to meet a lot of nice men and nice women, their girlfriends who don't even use Instagram.
This means the internet distorts reality because people who use social media less are much happier in real life and have healthy relationships.
Professor Sam Vaknin said in a video of the social dilemma of 2018, that Facebook doesn't want men to fall in love with their wives because it is the greatest threat to Facebook advertisements. They want men´s eyeballs looking at Facebook advertisements.
He says falling in love and intimacy is the ultimate addiction, which means it reduces the need for other addictions such as Facebook.
He says You are either on Facebook, or you have an intimate relationship.
Maybe start listening less podcasts, and do your own research in real life. because as you use the internet less
your happiness level increases, your focus increases, and your mindset changes.
When your mindset changes nd you practice empathy and gratitude, you attract the person who also has the same values.
But of course even the best youtubers may change their opinion.
Having open mind mena sthta you dont have the same opinion every day.
But listen mostly the podcasts about other hobbies suchs as sports, music science etc.
I’m not bothered about pursuing women ..
.. and it has completely revolutionized my life in an immesurably positive way .. giving up the pursuit of women has transformed my life 1000%; it has freed me up for more meditation / more reading and art / more creativity / more silence and balance and harmony / I can tryly say that I have found ‘love’ within myself and not as something that is dependent on outside factors or causality
I can only recommend it
This is the most awakened comment I’ve read this far. Thank you. From the woman’s vantage point, I can agree entirely with this assessment. When a woman makes her spirituality more important than landing a man, she has truly transformed into one deserving of love from the right man.
Hi! I read your first post and then read the second.
Your first post really made an impression on me.
You sound like an INFJ, which is one of the Meyer's Briggs 16 personalities.
Then I read the second and knew instantly it was written by you.
So I looked back, and sure enough, it was you!
I am an INFJ, too.
I think you should look for an introvert, HSP, and an empath.
You definitely sound really thoughtful and emotionally bright, along with being intelligent!!
Just continue on, and you will be fine. 🌺🙏✌️🇺🇸❤️🌎🙏✌️🇮🇱🥰
I’m in the same boat but I’m a woman.
Let women chase the men then maybe they will appreciate one who agrees to get into a relationship with them.
Can't imagine that life for myself without being intimate (in & out of bed) with a woman tbh..
Almost 37 and all I did was kiss a girl. I stopped caring at this point and I've given up
I had my first kiss at 40 and married another girl at 41
As a woman outside US. the situation is actually the same. I think it because we live in abundance society where you can live alone and get your entertainment online. Another factor that might be personal is your parents relationship that just not healthy and you don’t want to have that in your life.
True
It’s feminism and the unrealistic expectation’s that have been taught and perpetuated by the mainstream and frankly I’d say it’s to do with the sale of antidepressants, you might want to consider which single demographic is highly dependent on them. I’ve lived in numerous cultures and found outside of countries where feminism hasn’t been installed, family values and the traditional family are prioritized. Feminism tells women you’re being treated unfairly and ignores the trials and tribulations that men undergo in a relationship, it’s a selfless act given by both partners for the good of your children. Such a simple concept which is scoffed at in the west and feminism
It’s not feminism it’s pay parity. If we have a modern society and both parents work it is the pay that is the problem. Esp in a patriarchal system of which has been twisted to favour men.
@@suzemurray1257 a patriarchal society? In what way? I’m also assuming you don’t actually believe that women are paid less for the same work, do you? To believe in such a thing would be to have no education in basic economics, to lack any complete ability to be impartial, to be stuck in an echo chamber and to be void of logic. Women live longer, men are descriminated against by law, women are favored in high skilled jobs and in many industries because of their gender. Women get all the scholarships in education, dominate education at 60%, earn more up to the age of 30, society makes living life on easy mode for women in western society. The fact that men on the whole earn more is because they deserve it, despite the odds. Men work more hours, more dangerous jobs and are 6/7 work centric compared to women who prefer work/life balance at 1/7.
@@whokilledjr3719 men work more hours because the majority of career men have a wife. If I am void of logic then You are void of the nuances within a societal structure and the abuses of the economic systems that prevail. After all, these systems have developed purely for economic gain and less for the welfare of our children. Hence the inordinate amount of narcissistic young adults we have today.
A lack of mutual respect and patience for mistakes are some general problems I’ve faced constantly.
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line ❤
I think for a lot of us men especially once we get to the point where we’ve built our stability and success we realize the benefits of being in a romantic relationship are overshadowed by the risk and sacrifices that come with it. Why would I risk everything I’ve built for someone whom could exploit me when things aren’t going as they want? Why would I give up my peace and freedom to bind myself to the whims of another? For many of us with a decent social framework the only thing that that doesn’t provide is the sexual aspect of it. Many of us see that as a risky proposition that potentially puts us at the mercy of a legal system that historically does not side in our favor. If the only thing my social framework lacks is sexual gratification then I myself would rather avoid the risk and just satisfy that need myself.
Yep. Same for women
Same for women at the same socioeconomic position. Sometimes we focus too much in the gender but maybe its more of an economic and age issue?
That's exactly the same for women too, with the added risk of being killed or raped by your new boyfriend. I'm glad I'm now passed the age of being able to have children, so not put under continued pressure to date. It's a better choice to be single.
I think man really marry for love while women really marry for security.
@DeborahAberdeenUK Women kill and rape, too. All you're doing is exactly what they discussed in the video, making it a dumb competition. In fact, if you want to go down that route, men are more at risk of harm and threat in general.
If all you want is to be perceived as the biggest victim, we'll good luck finding an actual man in an actual relationship involving actual love, because what you displayed is what is wrong with society.
With social media and dating apps it is way easier for women to just find someone else than it is to work on a relationship once it becomes challenging. I craved a meaningful relationship with someone ever since I was attracted to girls... being married, having children, building a home, finding a "soulmate" and all the antiquated romantic things one could imagine. But after so much heartbreak I have sort of given up on that dream, the pain of yet another breakup after getting my hopes up is just too much to bear. You develop emotional scar tissue and you sort of lose the ability to love. Each breakup damages you a little and then comes a moment when you just don't feel anything anymore and people become just a fun "thing" to do. The new discourse is: live the moment, have fun and let go... I hate it but also I have no control over it, times have changed.
🎯
Feel like I’m in this boat. Would like for it to be different and I haven’t closed myself off, but my expectations for it to actually happen are quite low.
I'm 53 and I pretty much agree. After all the lying, cheating, rejection, games, and general weirdness (even with the women in my generation), there comes a point where you just have to drop out of the game, if only to preserve your mental health. I'm not bitter or angry. Just realistic (and maybe a bit sad, if I'm being honest).
Things like this makes me want to 🔥 western society. And I'm not even westerner.
Ffs youtube keep shadowbanning me lmao.
@@fwa8590 It's not only West, it's everywhere where the Internet has reached.
People in GOOD relationships have better health and all the good stuff.
But most relationships are not good
Good relationships take effort. It's easier for people to get online and find a new one today.
My thoughts!
Grass is greener where you water it.
@@mbg9650 the grass is greenest near the sewage treatment plant
I explained all this in The "Where Have All the Good Men Gone?" Hypothesis, but there are some other factors to consider:
1. Significant increases in societal narcissism
2. Divorce rates
3. That although people assert women should lower their standards, if they did, they would feel discontent, and likely take it out on whoever they pair with
4. That, like most of these single men, these women who attempt to hold out for a man who has more status than themselves, will end up in the same boat.
Ultimately, reality will slap everyone in the face.
That’s generally also what I’d thinks I’d pair in your first point also with entitlement. And I’d apply it to both sexes from what I’ve seen.
Speaking as a straight guy, that is, I’ve come across a lot of guys who have no prospects but thinks their being put down because of Sofia Vargera’s of the world are not sexually interested in them.
At the same time a lot of young women have wildly out of sorts expectations on their ‘mr right’.
One way or another, come what may, reality will bite back, and it’ll uncaringly bite back hard.
I’m 37, happily married to a foreign woman, I’m older of the millennial pack, and I seriously wonder how things will look in the next 20 years.
RPMT, you're so right.
I would confirm women should definitely NOT lower their standards. Even if that means you need to train your patience. I did it several times (they had lower value than me, narcs and abusive or just not a good match) and it was terrible, painful and a complete waste of time in the end. It goes nowhere.
As Matthew Hussey was saying, you'll meet your Mr Right much faster if you don't lose any time on all the Wrong ones. Time is not coming back. Ladies, be wise!
No women shouldn’t lower their standards. The more that experience the post wall world the funnier it gets. Enjoy that invisibility that the average male experiences his entire life
I'm not sure why women want a guy with more status. What could be more attractive than a man who genuinely cares? I realize there must be some attraction, but someone who is willing to go the distance should be so much more attractive than a guy who just sleeps with every woman who is willing. When dating the man I married, I remember how he made me feel when he would always walk me to my car and he would ask me to call when I got home. He would call me in the mornings and tell me he hoped I would have a good day. He has flaws, but I have them as well. Welcome to the human race.
@@reginasemenenko148 you got yourself a good one. Nobody said high value means filthy rich and a cheater. That's where the confusion is.
I met my husband at the bus stop 9 years ago today. We are happily married for 2 years. I didn't use any dating apps, I just went out and started talking to him. That's the beauty of saying what if, go and do it. Also, tune into your value systems not so much about education, money or what they have. For a relationship to work you need at least 40% attraction and 60% everything else. How does he make you feel? Does he make you laugh? Does he provide for you... but it doesn't have to be a high level job. If he has values that treat you well, work hard, and is kind and you are attracted to him. Then stop looking... you got him. So stop looking for something better because most of the time they will not treat you right like the person who may not be as popular.
Very true. Women need to calm down and stop living in a fantasy. Marrying for money or status is the quickest route to a miserable life for both men and women.
Most men will not admit how turbulent and miserable promiscuity, going for extremely attractive plastic women and multiple partners make their life because men like to think about positive results even when doing things that are detrimental. Just like most women won’t admit how lonely and miserable constantly dating for money, looking down on perfectly good men that will make great partners or chasing after the so called high value men makes them.
You are already making money, I’ll never understand why you cannot respect and give yourself to a man that doesn’t earn as much if you two are supposed to be partners.
@@Anigeriantakewithdeothe reason why it doesn't work is because typically men want to be the leaders in the household. Also, families break up when women are miserable. They become miserable when they have to split bills and also take on most of domestic labor. On another note, men like it when women admire them. When a woman makes more it is hard for her to do that, but easy for the barista to do. Then he cheats. This is what is happening.
Money has become more important now. I met a girl and I feel anxious about ability to provide given she doesn't earn much
Couldn't agree more!!
Bus stop wow haha
I’m done after 2 failed relationships and a divorce. They all ended the same way, my woman meets 6.5 foot tall guy with a trust fund. Leaves me just to get used and dumped. So much weakness in modern relationships.
she got outplayed by a trust fund guy?
it is exhausting on both ends.
people have become more selfish than ever. there is more of i don't care attitude instead of learning to care for each other. everything has become more of me topic instead of us topic. people just don't care anymore. that has become a normalised attraction.
100% agree. This really resonated with me. As a woman, I am in lots of women-only spaces where they actively verbalise I Don’t GAF. And I just think that is so anti feminine 🤷🏼♀️
You're right. We're taught to give up.
I feel like we’ve learned to protect ourselves, put up these walls and when things don’t work out, we can just say we’ll we didn’t care anyway, on to the next! But in reality, it hurt and you get even more scared of the next potential partner and the pain it might come with, it’s a vicious cycle.
and people like this shit. so who should take the blame?
I don't care.
I believe, as Chris notes, there are many benefits to having a relationship, and part of the problem is that young people have lost the ability to make a connection with their hearts. So, ultimately, a relationship is not just a series of transactions; it is a continuous series of actions with elements of selfless compassion.
Beautifully stated!
Agree!
🎯 Most of them don't even have a relationship with themselves. No reflection skills whatsoever
@@pawwelmussial2916dating apps culture doesn't help. It encourages transactional esque interactions.
@@pawwelmussial2916 Men learn from women. Every asshole, every player. No man teaches another man to be bad to women. Women teach men that being good, being in love, caring isnt wanted or rewarded. Being hot and fun will ALWAYS be preferred.
Women dont want to build a relationship and life with a man. She wants a man who has it all so she can live off of it and have fun. Or chase status herself and then just pick men to have fun with.
Women dont want to depend on a partner. Just expect and demand of him. When he has nothing more she leaves for someone who has. A Womans life isnt about earning and growing. Its about consuming and reacting. She simply chooses. A Life of being entertained. Like that of a child or a dog/mammal. She doesnt need to think, Just feel and enjoy. Even when dating she sits back and demands men to entertain her at his expense. Women literal have no accountability and the freedom to spend all your money and just leave.
Love, romance. Men love idealistic. Or maybe those ideals are tricks came up to push men to provide attention to the parasite called a woman.
You can virtue signal all you want. But when the reality is observed. Women with all their equality, slogans and virtue signaling haven't made an attempt in keeping society functioning. Men are still the slaves while women freely use and abuse the system that keeps them alive. And women dont care. Men are waking up to that fact.
I was blown off a lot when I was younger. I moved away and started a family later in life and now a lot of women I grew up around want to start showing attention. I’m so happy in my life and others are reflecting at a “what could have been.”
What pisses me off about this conversation. Is that looks aren't addressed. It pisses me off when people talk about status, employment but don't address physical attractiveness.
Even though he mentioned the black pill instead of the red one
The biggest problem in today’s dating market is that no one’s willing to give in or come to middle ground you do one thing wrong and you dropped breathe wrong I feel like people are looking for reasons to eliminate you also everybody’s feeling like they settling and don’t get me started on Dating apps and everybody mostly women confuse options for actual potential partners and I feel like every woman I run into are broken for some reason in my experience It’s not for the weak out here 🙄
Why is everyone saying "people" instead if women theae days. Its weird
The biggest problem in today's dating market is porn has fried men's brains to the point they have less discipline than a toddler which is very unattractive. Vast majority of guys out there cannot talk to an attractive woman for 15 mins without treating her like a sex toy even in work settings yet they wonder why self respecting women are rejecting them. They're so consumed by their sex addiction that women MUST stay away from them or risk being a single mum
@@keiranmorrisartcuz he is a fking simp
@@keiranmorrisartBecause when it's men misbehaving, it's men misbehaving.
When it's women misbehaving, you have to frame it as "people in general" or they will dismiss you as mysoginist.
Watch out. You're going to piss off the lefties. @@DeKnight95
after trying apps for 2 years with little to no success I uninstalled and gave up.
Same here man, algorithms and womens views suck sadly.
@@gallopinggoose7997 damn I feel for you
Try reverse psychology. Everything about you, do the opposite. It works on a superficial level because, let's face it. A lot of 304s are superficial. Suppose you're after deep love. I wouldn't recommend it-a bit of fun. Sure, go ahead.
Also upgrade your style, appearance, and mindset and take quality photos. There are vids on which pictures you should upload. Works every fkn time.
I can't believe how accurate he was with his words. I was that woman who was uneducated and looking for a man to marry and have kids in my mid 20's. I was living in a small town with limited options and found no one. So l moved to the city for better prospects. Still didn't meet a man. I was used and left broken by a man at 38. It was then that l knew it would take me years to heal from his hurt and that it meant I would never have children. I could also no longer see my value as a woman to a man because I would not be able to have his child. So l needed to come up with a plan for myself to look after myself financially.
I never cared for education because I was taught by my parents it was unnecessary as I would get married and have children. Which l also thought was my life path.
But att 40 went to university to get my nursing degree. Just as l started to work my first job at 44 I met one of those high value men that every woman wants and he is newly divorced. And even though I know the feeling is mutual, what's the point when so many women want him!!
I never wanted a man like that. Don't want to deal with the fact he is always tempted with other women.
At the end of the day there will always be women, younger, smarter, more beautiful than me and everyone else.
What's the point?! What's the point if I can't have kids as I'm too old now.
I've been single,. sexless and alone for many years now. I've never broken my own heart and I've been independent for so long that it's my normal and safe place.
Similar story myself. Being CNBC is not easy but better than being in an abusive relationship. Glad you are treating yourself with respect, you deserve that.
Thats a heartbreaking story. Feminism really screwed everyone up.
Hey , i still believe you can have a happy ending don't give up
@@jonnjones8263Why are you blaming feminism for this lady's problems? She was uneducated and looking for a man in her 20s. Isn't that what you all want? Smh
Find your happiness and peace in JESUS, he loves you unconditionally.
Part of those statistics is just how fucked the money is. My dad was born in 42. He got married at 19. Bought his first new house at 20. Bought his first new car at 22 and his first new Corvette at 24. He had a wife who didn't work and 4 kids in his first marriage. How much would you need to make to do that today and how easy is it to get a job making that much money? When I graduated high school I was making minimum wage and could barely afford to rent a room from someone let alone pay for a wife and four kids, buy a new car and buy a new house. How are people supposed to start a family in their early twenties if they can't even afford to support only themselves?
I met my partner at 21. We have been together 33 years we never married. She is my best friend and mother of my two Children. I can count on one hand the number of arguments we had in 33 years and those were resolved very quickly. There are good women out there.
Thank you. Doomer have us believe no good women exist.
But they do. I hope I will be worthy enough for one to accept me
You lucked out. All the best to you.
There are also people that win the lottery out there. Would you suggest playing the lotto as a reasonable choice for making a living?
Not arguing isn't a sign of a strong relationship. It's a sign that one gives in more than oftened. When partners can Argue and argue well. That is a sign of strength.
So why arnt you married.. I’m curious to know
Women once used to chose from a very small pool of men, a club, work, neighbours. Now they all believe they can compete for very rich men. This is not tenable
Exactly. Instead of picking their favourite guy in their town they’re being seen by men all over the world. When you couple this with the fact that most women confuse their sexual options as potential mate partners it’s no wonder we’re in this terrible situation.
Same is true for men. They had a small pool of women. Not they all just want looks and hot girls. And only fans and online porn- that is an even bigger problem.
@@PRHVideoFilenot really, Polling data from dating apps show that average men find average women as attractive but the reverse is not true. Women only found the top 10 to 20 % of men as attractive.
@@trshashank4 Really? I'll have to look up the data on that. From what my female friends say, they feel like it is opposite. I do know a ton of women who have been rejected for online porn and only fans though. It is a bad problem for some men.
@@PRHVideoFileIt's even worse on dating apps such as Tinder etc, for example, where women only swipe right on ~5% of men while men swipe right closer to the ~50% mark.
Agree on the problem with porn however. But that is a result of the immorality and degeneracy feminism and Marxism has pushed hard for, for decades ever since the fertility control inventions (contraceptions and abortion which is rooted in eugenics) which sparked the sexual revolution which was advocated for by early feminists such as Simone de Beauvoir, the post modern Marxists such as Michel Foucault etc. It's the same ideology which drives the alphabet dogma today as well as the feminist one.
If I'm to be fair to women regarding critique when it comes to men, it would be fair to say that they haven't really been taking on their responsibility and duties as men but at the same time if they had they would have been deemed patriarchal and toxic by our modern women and the culture the progressives, social democrats are advocating for and enforcing.
There's no fixing this problem, it will persist and haunt not only us but our children and grand children as well and most likely several generations onwards after them. We, our children, grand children will witness a dramatic population collapse.
We'll be lucky if there are more than a billion people left on the planet in 100 years. I doubt there will even be half of that.
The collectivists won, they will achieve their goals they have worked so hard towards. The lucky few who will be left will in all likelihood have to endure collectivist tyranny that will make the Soviet Union and the Third Reich appear like saints in comparison.
I feel sorry for my son that I brought in to this world and what he will have to endure in his life but I've grown apathetic to everyone else and society. I only care about my son now, nothing else.
It is what it is.
I’ve chosen to be alone, because any deeper connection (be it emotional / intellectual or spiritual) has become impossible. I’ve realized that I can only have that with ‘myself’.
Literally every single woman I’ve met for the past 10y only cares about superficial material things .. about the next car or watch she will buy, about the next expensive meal she will eat .. about entertainment and enjoyment of s€x and movies .. planing out when to have a child as if it were a product life cycle ..
There is no talking to people anymore (men or women), because nobody has anything to say .. not really .. all people communicate about is what they’ve consumed .. I dont know anyone who reads books .. and I dont mean ‘self help’ or ‘how to be successful’ books .. I mean real books - literature / philosophy or psychology (actual theory and not these Jordan Peterson 10 rules for a successful life social consensus indoctrination ‘manuals’).
There is no point .. people have been assimilated by consumption .. they have become more automated and mechanical than the machines they consume ..
spot on
Maybe thats what humanity has always been? That "Deeper" history you read about is fake. Thats the issue. When you think you are smarter and deeper you cut yourself off from what it means to be human and enjoy the simple things.
Look at LOTR. The shire people were stupid, but they lived life. The rest of the world was distracted by their ideals. Even Bilbo and frodo were affected by it. So much they couldnt live in the shire anymore around normal humans.
Mindless consumption is the same no matter the medium. Classical or modern. A Tower is a tower no matter where it is placed.
Wow, powerful words. There is a ring of truth, in a certain perspective. I think to some extent this is not a modern problem however we like to superimpose our perspective on biological reality. But the truth I believe is that most people simply live boring shallow lives and you seem to have a deep inner world. Rare as it might be, perhaps there is another who does as well....good luck.
I hear ya, I write books and nobody I know reads anymore
yeah no communication no more it's sad
This is great. Chris has interviewed hundreds of experts on these subjects on his podcast, and we benefit from his countless hours of work by letting him summarize it for us in this 12 minute clip. Bravo
People I understand that the world can make you feel scared, disempowered and hopeless. Please don’t give up on your soul and spirits. We all deserve love and purpose. Don’t buy into fear. Live to thrive to your fullest potential. Be the love you want to see in the world. Your man or woman will be drawn to that. The right one for you. It’s not all rainbows and not easy. In fact a great relationship can be challenging but you should always feel safe and loved in it. Look within at your own shadow sides and be willing to take accountability to grow together.
Thats nice to believe but thats not the world we live in today. We have to live in reality and the reality is that good marriages seem like winning the lottery: some people win, the majority just lose whatever they spent.
We have to first realise that the system we live in is making us behave certain way. Look around and acknowledge what the current society is praising and supporting - consumerism, competitiveness , addictions just look at the way how marketing is done making you buy all the shit things that you don't even need and how they promote sex and porn above real human connection. We are just going for all these things because we are being promised that this will bring us happines. Mothers are forced to leave their babies to go to work as soon as the baby is born , mortgages are through the roof, childcare crazy expensive too, people struggling to really connect and have meaningful relationships.Or even worse people being together in a relationship for all the wrong reasons , economical reasons for example. We live in an unhealthy completely broken society disconnected from the nature and from one another. One must be super aware of what is going on around and within in order not to fall this and understand what the real meaning of life is and what the real human connection and relating to one another is about.
There's literally no reason for a good-looking woman (as the rest are completely invisible to men, no matter how hard some might try to deny it) to be in a 50/50 relationship. Economical reasons are pretty much the only actual important reasons.
I feel like this is the 1 of the few mature well thought out responses on here
I’ve thought about this for a while
That is well observed, we're still great apes and our brain is getting way too much stimulations. I'm a young millenial/old gen z and most of my friends can't just lie or sit and do nothing, they're addicted to brain stimulations.
Given how sheeple most people are, do they really deserve more?
My wife and I often joke that we can't leave each other cus neither of us want to date in this bizarre modern world. Seems like the joke is actually on us, lol, cus it's looking more true by the day.
I'm a 31-year-old, handsome, 5"11 (average height), professionally accomplished, emotionally intelligent/mature man and I'm currently a part of that 50% of men that is not seeking any kind of a romantic relationship with women. I can go out and get them, I'm good at it, but my life is a lot quieter, simpler, more content right now without them. I have friends who are girls but otherwise I'm enjoying peace and quiet, thank you very much.
Do you want a family unit that includes a wife in the future ? If not sure, what would motivate you to have one ?
I'm in the same boat as him and I don't want kids in the future@@sunflowerpower642
@@sunflowerpower642he’s probably in the upper percentile of men whom
Women pay attention to. In terms of looks I have no issues with women either. If you’re in the upper percentile because of female empowerment and access to technology, the access to women is almost bottomless. He holds the cards at this point and if he chooses to give up dating for a family he can. Asking him what would stop him from enjoying his life at this point would probably have to be quite special. There’s really little reason for an accomplished, attractive man to get married because what does he get out of it? It only helps the woman who have a higher chance of divorce. Marriage isn’t sacred for women.
You don't search for a relationship, is this including dating or not
Nobody wants to address the issues of a socio-economic system like capitalism. The same reason women and men are giving up on love is the same reason people are giving up on the American dream. When you create a society that encourages fierce competition among its citizens, values and prioritizes money and status as a metric of success and allows its government to treat people as commodities, this is what likely happens. You can't expect a society that encourages rugged individualism with a winner take all attitude to be a cooperative, caring society that is interested in the well being of others. Americans believe they can have it all. They are finding out the hard way that they can't.
Well said
Well, that’s because America has been capitalistic since its founding, and this is a new problem. They don’t have anything to do with one another.
👏 👏👏
@@cynicist8114 No. Actually it has been a problem since the beginning and slowly progressed to the point of where we are now. America has always been a capitalist system with the facade of democracy to keep people from rising up. Now I believe it is time for people to rise up because the problems have become insurmountable. Capitalism and democracy are diametrically opposed to each other. Government can no longer keep the veil of lies over the people.
Capitalism is stripped of stuff like faith and community. I think these were a sort of counter balance.
I think perhaps there are pieces missing from this conversation. A reason that people take a break from dating is to try and become emotionally healthy eg. work on developing a secure attachment styles to avoid acting out co-dependent patterns. Many people don't have healthy relationship role models and see only destructive or painful relationships. I think there is a movement towards trying to redefine relationships so that they support good emotional health. We haven't arrived there yet and the transition is painful. There is a lot to heal from previous generations and intergenerational trauma is often enacted within relationships. It is a time of learning and growth.
Don’t come here with your mature and adult viewpoints. You’ll upset the other commenters! ;)
@@rosebud040686 ha ha! Thanks for the compliment :)
this! I had an abusive childhood and would rather not out my love through horrible rollercoasters,I want to be much better so I can be good for a man. Other than that,I hold very traditional balues and I love to cook and bake,and believe in pleasing a man after a long day at work
You can get married, have kids, and be a happy person without spending time in therapy "doing the work." Most of humanity throughout most of history has done just that. Part of the problem with relationships today is that people place *too much* emphasis on this kind of therapeutic outlook; marriages are happier and calmer when we focus on day-to-day problems rather than trying to work through our childhood trauma or some such thing.
@@davidfranklin5434 sure but most of human history didn’t have parents who spearheaded the sexual revolution
I met my husband 39 years ago at a party, we just clicked. We spent time together, we learned we had the same values and goals and learned to trust each other. Maybe young people need to get off dating apps and hang around people irl. Just a thought.
That's a big one. When you went out, I'll bet you were socializing with the people around. Today, out in public, most people can be found gazing down at their phone, interacting with someone who isn't there.
@@ff23321 exactly. There was no internet, so we had to go where the people were. It works, people.
Did you forget young people were locked inside for 2 years to protect the elderly?
@@mikehimes7944 Are you saying that young people lost their social skills during the pandemic?
I agree but it isn't that simple. Attention spans are shorter & women have too many options.
Men risk adverse & realizing the juice isn't worth the squeeze (devorce laws)
A lot of packed information in here. Very valuable.
People are so empty, included myself, but then I started little by little to search from God and I humbly recognize how different perspective I have.
We men are tired of being psychologically damaged beyond repair, the pain of loneliness is easier than the consequences of trying yet another relationship. What women do to a man is so bad that people have a hard time believing the testimonies.
What’s loneliness. I think having no harmony with family and friends is way more lonely than not having a SO in our lives.
Word, and it’s rarely ever talked about.
I don’t blame homicidal maniacs, I’m surprised there aren’t more.
You are raising a good point and it’s a shame that some men are experiencing this….but Is this really because of women as the main reason? As most men don’t open up and express their emotions. Most men don’t allow themselves to be vulnerable and do not have healthy friends who they can literally cry on, men always have to be men and act tough and strong and that isn’t healthy. It’s a conditioning that goes beyond mens interaction with women. Women cry with other women, open up, cuddle each other, have slumber parties, process emotions when they go through a breakup. Isn’t it time that there’s a conversion on men finally starting to let go of always having to be so strong or resort to sleeping around to find some form of fulfilment. Something has to change! Men need to start deeper conversions on some of what I’ve shared above.
@@queenchiomaofficialI appreciate the heart behind what you’re trying to say, but only part of what you describe is socialisation. The majority is due to the fact that men ARE different to women and asking men to be more like women to be healthy is a contributing factor to why people aren’t connecting I believe.
Just because I havent met the right person or been single for years, it doesnt mean ive given up.
"How do you solve this problem?"
"The first thing is that I won't answer your question, but I will try to pander to the women, in hopes of keeping the view that I'm "high value"."
Sounds about right.
I’ve given up simply because it’s just not meant for me
You make up the majority of men today
@@Jewel_Screaming_Chango8387 I’m not a man..
@@danieharkleroad your experience still stands with what I said for majority of heterosexual men in this era in the west, I pray for them
Homosexual men are doing just fine!
You're too weak. You don't have what it takes. You've given up even before you began to fight. No true warrior. What kind of defeatist attitude.
It’s hard for me to fathom how Chris is both so red-pilled, and yet, so blue-pilled.
Agreed
Maybe because that paradigm of a reductionist binary system is overly simplistic to the point of dysfunction
@@michaelbloomer451 Oh, well done. Extra points for your vocabulary test.
All he does is describe the problem, then say "we absolutely can't do anything to change what has caused this problem"
what’s your solution? eliminate women’s rights, so incels can get f-ed? touch grass and get a job.
The biggest point is Interchangeability. No one is special anymore to invest in just a little bit more effort. Everyone wants a relation as easy as pizza night delivery. No one creates a special moment to feel the happiness of enjoyment at a restaurant with anticipation. Everyone wants a fast food relationship.
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line ❤
basicly nobody wants to work to build up a relationship. This is not how it works. Relationships dont just grow on trees.
I always get the saying, "I want a man that's seasoned!! Come prepared with experience" But how can i have experience when no one wants to be with me so i have little to no experience 😮💨
They only say that because they are "seasoned". Find a woman who isn't "seasoned".
@t.8936 Easier said than done especially when you're in your late 20s 🤧
@@youngpacman1222women have been conditioned to think that men also want a seasoned woman. The movies and magazines have been telling women this for YEARS. We are the stupid ones for listening. When are people gonna wake up and see thag the information we are fed is destroying us? Break the mould.
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line ❤
I was single and not dating at all until 30. I had a great life and a big family and church. I traveled a lot and lived in several countries. I am from a city full of Latinos, Miami, with strong family and friendship bonds. I married at 31 and hated it. It was so much work. Finally, remarried at 38. No one tells you marriage is about companionship and a team and an economic partnership. We had a child when I was 40. He 38. It has been great, but hard at times. He is German . I American of Cuban descent. What helped us is both having strong families and goals. Today, in our early 50s, we are blessed with a wonderful child and , yes , we can’t travel like before. But we have lived in Europe and California, Texas and enjoyed traveling within there. We’ve developed as a team. Yes, our child sees himself as an important part of this family. Romance comes and goes so you need a lot more to begin and keep a marriage.
You’re so blessed, thanks for sharing 🎉
I get tired reading this.
Consider yourself lucky to even give birth at 40. You're in the minority.
Just say youre high maintenance, no need to write a novel
@@nathanjames6454 she got herself a partner, unlike u u incel.
Thank you for asking for solutions and not just rehashing the issue.
Don’t keep telling us modern dating is broke, let’s discuss how we can all help fix it…
There is a quote that if you start practicing meditation, metacognition, and physical exercise it helps you to release stress,
for example, Qi-Gong helps muscle release and mental health, mental blockages etc. Or you may practice breathing techniques.
If you will practice empathy, love, and gratitude more than 50 percent or more than 70 percent of the day, you will start noticing changes in your life, in health, relationships, jobs, hobbies,etc Because your body will feel cleaner and energized as all the negative thoughts and also the toxins will be released out of your body thanks to Qi-Gong or another type of exercises, laso regeneration of your body will be much faster because it creates better circulation of the blood that transports nutrients, and it increases the circulation of other body fluids. It prevents overtinking, and insomnia, improves immunity etc. You will feel more at ease and you will feel your muscles and organs better. You will breathe better. People will notice your good energy. Also, you may practice Static Qi-gong which has all these effects on the body and muscles. The one exercise is called Qi. You may exercise it 5 minutes, because its not easy to maintain the balance. Gym exercise creates pressure in muscles but This Qi static exercise creates a "muscle release". It improves your body posture. You will better feel the pelvis whether it's in a good position etc. As it strengthens your body balance and it also improves your mental balance. The energy is flowing from your head to your feet, your feet are rooting into the ground and under the feet. then as the energy goes to the ground it goes back up to your body, which improves the circulation of the body fluids. You may laos research a Medical Qi-Gong. Doctors who do accupressure use it too.
Or you may do other exercises such as Thai-chi etc, but the thing is you should practice self-love, which improves the energy of your mind and body and practice empathy and gratitude, or some meditation because mediation is releasing negative emotions or false beliefs about your self-worth and it affects your career, relationships etc.
It can't be fixed. Not ethically anyway. Whatever. We'll prolly be long dead by the time things get really bad.
The fact that noone has spoken of an actionable solution yet is because they might be too extreme to express. Like a war, or insane inflation and destruction of wealth, basically reminding people that its better to stick together and that ultimately its not your corporate job of writing Excel sheets that matter. I dont think there is any other way around, you cant magically make women care more or lower their standards or drop back
They never did get to the solutions though. Maybe I missed it.
You can't. It'd be better if they just stopped talking about it.
This clip is the proverbial Maggi cube of social interaction today. Brilliant. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing this gentlemen! I really appreciate it as a 52 year old American man living in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. I've seen so many in divorce or in third or more marriages or just plain are staying single and have given up on relationships. It is so sad. I am a Christian man, also, and when I tried the other day to give out Gospel tracts that had written on them about love, many had just ignored me or just plain said no! No! to love. Whether they were a teenager or older, many rejected a message about love. I mean, not all, but a good many that past me by on the street. I wanted to cry because there is so much hate in this life. Some years back, I tried to give a young couple this same message and they said no that they didn't want it. Wait a minute, weren't theyjust holding hands and in love? Oh, no! They say we don't want love. That would be a bad thing. So what did they have then if not love? Only hate. People don't want love. You know that God is love and without God we wouldn't have love. A world without love is what we have now. I'm in a loveless sexless marriage with my wife for almost 20 years now and I hate marriage because of what my wife had done to destroy our relationship. I still loved her, but she didn't love me back and threw it all away. So I've started to lose trust in love. I've asked God to renew my faith in love and in marriage again. I don't want to go to a wedding again either because I'll only cry thinking that the bride and groom will be divorced later. I've been to so many who have ended up this way. How did we get here to this place? God bless you both!
"How do you solve the problem?" Chris Williamson: "I have no idea but don't blame women because they are my audience."
Putting women down by denying education is not the answer, is what he said. Listen to what he actually says if you're going to paraphrase.
Also, why don't you bring up the fact that if "all" top 2 % men just use women and any man who reaches that status refuses to settle, then women are right saying all men are trash. You would do the same if you could. "Being weak does not make you virtuous" - Jordan Peterson
So true. So much sugar coating here it's laughable.
@@xxxxxxxx8903 There are a lot of "ifs" in your comment. Change any of them with real data and your point is moot. For example "all men"? Let's stop trying to frame the narrative, shall we?
@@beomc4539 Well if all top 2 % men AREN'T bad then maybe the risk is worth it and women should try to for one, don't you think? She only needs one top 2 % man who is good to her and the rest of her life will be settled.
If all top 2 % men ARE bad, then isn't that an admission that all men are assholes when they think they can get away with it?
@@xxxxxxxx8903- who is denying women education. The education system is literally catering to women. Boys are the ones who are being left behind. We have over a decade of this happening, and the majority of colleges are full of women not men. Women are the ones who are getting degrees. Society overcorrected, and now it’s going to reap the whirlwind. We now have a generation of women who won’t date men who don’t make as much as they do but the vast majority of people getting degrees that pay over 100K a year are women, not men.
As a man, never let a Women be your life purpose, if you live for her approval then you might die of her rejection if things don't go fairytale Land, at the end of the Day trying to own an Aston Martin is harder than getting into a relationship, so challenge accepted.🤝
I agree. So owning an Aston Martin is your life purpose? Lol
An Aston Martin is a piece of metal that will rust.
A family is the conitnuation of billions of years of evolution and will further your genetic line into the human future.
@@quillo2747 Who dafuk cares about a genetic line? It's the dumbest narc sh*t on earth.
@quillo2747 an Aston Martin won't abandon you and your children when she gets "bored".
@@quillo2747future? The future seems bleak id rather not bring children into such an environment and if my bloodline dies so be it
Youve got one thing confused: It's not just the guys at the top that use and discard women, it's guys that perceive themselves at the top. Which is a significantly larger number.
No
Very insightful, thank you!
Nobody wants to date a loser, and that includes other loosers. Society has simply degenerated to the point that we are mostly repulsed by each other.
Damn bruh
Thats very stupid approach. Label loser can be assigned in any dimension of life, which ultimately makes it impossible to not being a loser at something. If someone loser at something then we tend to extrapolate. People need to learn how to live in reality. Marriage should be restored, now its totally broken.
Thats such a relative term tho. Back in the 50s a grocery store manager would be considered a stable good partner by chicks his age. Now if you aren't tate 2.0 your a wage slave loser. Its all degeneracy
True say. Look around. Hardly anyone is fit, the guys spend all their days staring at instagram models and of and the women look either like grandma at 25 (mrs claus glasses and short hair) or just like slobs. It's actually really depressing even for me, a married woman. Where is the joie de vivre??
If you're going to use big words like "loser", please learn how to spell them correctly. Otherwise, people might think you are "dum".
I dont need more drama in my life then i already have.
Letting a woman into your life (and sign a contract for it) is inviting a demon inside.
For a lot of people out there,the most pain they ever experienced,was from their own so called "family".
People change.Often times,people who were one thing before marriage,are completely different kind of person afterward.
Sad but true! I'm still trying to recover from my own childhood.
Thank you for the comment man.@@markflierl1624
Sure that describes most white and black American women, but Asian and Latina women for the most part arent nearly as crazy. Im a white guy and I very rarely ever even try to talk to a white or black woman, they just dont live in reality.
Yup
Your inability to negotiate peace and happiness with any potential partner is a clear indication of your own character weakness.
Great, insightful dialogue.
My gawd this clip cut off at the most interesting moment! Truly loving this channel and I just discovered it this week! Keep it coming!
With all due respect, I think these factors only explain what’s happening at a very superficial level. Societally, breakdown in communication skills, misunderstandings, and unwillingness to compromise seem like the foundational problems.
Losing all hope is freedom.
No, on the contrary, cultivating and growing your hopes despite life suffering and death inevitability is the only path to freedom.
Freedom is about detaching everything that it chains you, that includes people, beliefs, reasons, & objects and continuing living. You can't be truly free because you will always attach with something. Always. But I won't say hope is lost, it's just a perspective that it will change eventually, if you change or let it go some of the points mentioned, and that's what being free is so wonderful.
This episode is like looking in a mirror. You guys remind me of each other so much (wife feels the same). Keep up the awesome work, love your content.
Absolutely nailed it. Take note society!
The key points that I picked up from this discussion are that there is a misconception that one cannot have a relationship and persue their personal goals in tandem. And, that people are being quite superficial when looking for a life partner. If the first part was immutably true, there would be so many more issues in the world right now. It depends on what one values and what one determines is worth spending time on. As an example, take a look at the life of RBG.
The second part has been taught by society and needs to be tempered a bit to get closer to reality. People should be looking for someone who they are compatible with, whom they are attracted to, who shares their values and hopefully inspires them. The other things are secondary, still important, but not the foundations. If one only looks at the superficial things, and ignores the deeper parts of others they will almost always be disappointed by the fact that their vision doesn't match up with actual people.
Single man in my 40s. Really struggling to find a woman unwilling to let go of her baggage at this age. Let me be clear, I don't have a problem that they have baggage, I expect it. But dear lord when you find a kind, thoughtful, honest, loyal man, learn to let go of your baggage. Not every man is going to cheat on you or abuse you. These women allow their baggage to completely ruin the relationship. Learn to let go of the past ladies.
By this age women lack the ability to show empathy to men and are just cynical and bitter.
Then there is the approval of the sisterhood, we all know misery loves company so they allow "friends" to scupper any chance of romance for fear of being left alone with cats and gin.
Mmmm if ALL the women you encounter are reacting to you negatively maybe it's not just them that have baggage. Maybe you are a narcissist, have avoidant attachment or are otherwise intolerable.
@@lnaph that would be a possibility except I'm not and their behavior (jealousy, distrust) doesn't align with anything I'm doing. Because I travel to work on a project and one of the team members is an attractive female, that doesn't mean I'm sleeping with her. I'm sorry your ex used to travel and fuck all of his coworkers, I'm not him and implying that I'm doing something I'm not just because you imagine it doesn't make it true.
Hi there
@Memnock123 I'm a single woman in my 40s and I agree with what you're saying and find it on both sides tbh. I think ppl need to do a lot of healing before going into another relationship. In a world were we all feel easily replaced by a quick swipe, I can see how it's hard for both men and women to trust. But once trust is established, we mustn't let unhealed minds destroy it again.
He reminds me of the original Spartacus actor
Chris Williamson is brilliant and compassionate
People who are in “healthy relationships” probably have better health outcomes. Unhealthy relationships have catastrophic consequences for individual health and the health of children. There is much needed context in this evaluation! In addition, Men on all levels of this “spectrum” are adverse to relationships. Women care far more about communication and relationship quality than a quality scale. This whole conversation commoditizes relationships. Relationships are not products.
Agreed. What he omits to say is that women have raised their standards and don’t tolerate nonsense and disrespect.
@@acs2735 what made me chuckle is how he immediately went to protect the modern woman from the very thing that has caused the issue in the first place lol. You cannot make this rubbish up
I agree with this wholeheartedly! The well-being of children is never discussed when these conversations come up, but children are impacted tremendously by the poor partnering of their parents. There are tons of people who probably should have never married and definitely should not be parents. If children are safer and have healthier parents as a result of the phenomenon discussed here, then in a generation or two, this problem will no longer be an issue.
@@acs2735 good. We cant be abused anymore!
@@James_36 "modern women" aka no one wants me 😂
Close connections are important, but casual friends can also make your day. I’m happy being single. I may be alone, but I never feel lonely 😊🤷🏻♀️
"I may be alone, but I never feel lonely"....That's the key.
Imagine marrying someone because you love them not because how much money they make.
Not hard to imagine when you are a man. It is the norm for the average dude out there.
Spend the time helping others being a better person mentally and physically then you are open for the opportunity for a loving relationship
This is actually a huge crisis. The rise of single person households is going to drastically change housing needs and push up house prices and rents while family homes are turned into smaller dwellings.
Being left homeless in a divorce is the solution 🙂 I like how this new society is taking place
@@personalfinance2338I see so many comments from men saying this. How exactly is one left homeless in a divorce? Are you saying your ex wife turned you out onto the street without shelter of any kind on a whim and without any reason? (For clarity, I’m not suggesting there is a valid reason for leaving someone homeless) or do you mean by “homeless” that you had to rent somewhere? I’m just always interested in these stories as I’m amazed so many men marry all these women who are closet psychopaths and there was no indication before the marriage whatsoever
Good point. Hadn’t considered that side of the equation.
@@rosebud040686 most housing, I think, is priced with the assumption of a 2 person "household" to cover cost. It's just an outdated mode in mind of builders, mgmt companies, lenders etc
@@rosebud040686 No fault divorce while hte divorse courts still favour the woman. Many men have lost the houses they paid for and were forced back to renting or made homeless while the woman keeps the house. If she has kept half the assets plus the house, you have to pay her monthly alomony with or without child support all garnished straight from your salary, its easy to not be able to afford to rent
I can’t blame men for not wanting to try to connect with women anymore. I think that the ability for men to find all the joy, power, prosperity, and cell fulfillment should never come from having a girlfriend or a woman they shouldn’t need one. Men aren’t perfect, but women aren’t either.
Does the urge for companionship not still remain?
@@cupboardofcheese1529 Yes but often not worth the trouble.
Ai android wives is a second option for heterosexual men
In my experience women are a pain to deal with in relationships. I don’t care how attractive they are their attitudes suck. I’ve had several girlfriends myself and I see this same trend with friends and family as well. Women cheating, misbehaving, getting caught up in drama. Women can be extremely difficult and critical with men, often starting arguments and creating situations. They’re always nice at first, that’s how they reel you in, but show me a man who hasn’t been extremely hurt by a woman’s words.
This is 100% the truth. This is how they weed out weak men. Women hate any type of weakness or inability to perform to their standards. There’s plenty of good men out there who will treat women really well but they don’t want that, they want everything a certain way to fit their individual preference. And things often start out great. If it’s a good thing why rock the boat? Yet I’ve seen women ruin a good thing so many times that it’s just sad. Then they’re on to the next thing. This is how these women rock around to age 40 with no man or no kids.
The pro's of staying single massively outweigh the cons for men now
One of the best synopsis’s on this topic I’ve seen.
I read the Morgan Stanley article and it says 45% of women will be single, but it doesn’t say they will be childless. Not sure where that bit came from.
Single mother households are actually on the rise.
People who are in a relationship, have a better health?
Shouldn’t it be distinguished between WHAT kind of relationship you’re in? Because that’s one of the problems - getting people to think like ‚does matter if it’s a healthy relationship or not, as long as I am in one.‘
In other words, unhealthy men are undatable.
Duh, women want the top guys,.
Men who die before puberty are all in the ,'never married: category so of course the AVERAGE married man would live longer.
Math, understand it or don't use statistics.
This isn't true for women, check the research
Math, again math.
Please for the love of God try to understand the math before using a statistic.
.
.
I would've liked to hear what his solution to the problem was. Too many people complain about the state of things, but there aren't many people who come with sensible solutions that don't involve women giving up the progress they've made in education and employment opportunities.
That's because there is no solution, we're all fucked!
The truth is working environment is not made for women. Meaning that although women are achieving more on a professional level, she has need that are not met. A woman has to choose between family or work, we ask them to balance both and still look young and beautiful, something that men are not asked to. The world is shaped around men, women just happen to fight for a place in it. It should also be shaped around them. My two cents.
@@4651adriCorrect, because there is a natural order to things, men work and gather resources, women take care of the children and maintain the home. If there is a natural order to things, you generally shouldn't change it. Women had a place in the world, just as men did. Both genders have a nasty habit of trying to fix shit that isn't broken, and generally when you do, it doesn't go the way you think it will!
Thank you for this comments 🙏 its great coming from a man. Being financially secured is a womans safety. Men need to understand that supporting you're wifes career and trying to make marriage fun is the only way.
@@4651adri❤
Thank you Steven for your work I feel it is of great assistance to society 😊
I work with high school and college girls and I tell them to focus on the life they want and build their lives and decisions around that. If they want marriage and family… spend your early years focusing on that and build a career around it. If you build your career first, you can easily get stuck. Every young woman is told to focus on her career in her twenties and that is the worst advice you can give a young woman in her prime.
Thanks, Kate, for sharing your common sense with girls who I'm sure badly need it.
Women are not good at giving other women this much needed advice
I'm 24 but I don't really have a guy I am in love with rn.
And I need to pull myself out of generational poverty.
@@dappidy3763 then definitely do that! Nothing is cut and dry. It’s wonderful that you want to get your own life together before bringing others into so that you can offer your full self. Best wishes, blessing to you and yours for generations to come.
Absolutely, remind them unlike men, their body clock runs out in their early 30's, not only then has Hypergamy set right in, she has gained her societal independence (You go gurl) but is factually likely to be single (2030 - 50% of women will be single) Not only this, by her early 30's she will be competing with all the other single women and younger women who still have their beauty and fertility. It is a no win really, that is why for the past 100,000 years it worked but add in Feminism, it has ruined it for everyone.
Conversations like this desperately need to be heard 👏🏻
women are not giving up, they are chasing the same guys
they are chasing guys out of their league
We should he chasing the good men though. This is good for humanity. Men just need to level up. By the time you're 35 you should really have your shit together. There is no excuse whatsoever not to be.
@@t.8936if it were true there wouldn’t be so many single mothers. Truth is women pick men they’re sexually attracted too for purely sex. The money stuff is irrelevant to many women when you’re young. Most young women would gladly be with a broke hot guy then some rich nerd. Money is a cope for men and women. When a women is sexually and physically attracted to you your net worth is irrelevant.
@@newazchowdhury332it’s not just that they’re out of their league, it’s that they’re too high in abundance and the guy is now shooting for the best of those options. The woman could very well be in his league.
@@t.8936when women compete with the men they’re chasing this naturally creates an adversarial relationship. In the natural world there’s no way women could surpass men because they’d need them to survive the elements, other people or animals and to aid them during childbirth. Create civilization, technology that decreases hardships and men are no longer a need but a want. When men are no longer a need down goes the birthrate. Women are chasing successful men in the modern day which means tech positive men with above average intelligence and hopefully the result in the modern world is offspring that the selectors have brought forth. Women select the quality of children from the seed of certain men. You’re essentially deciding en masse what the world will look like.
Very well explained by Chris.
Show the woman who is beautiful, bright and successful, yet sweet, loving, supportive and down to earth and gentlemen, that IS a prize.
Those are mutually exclusive choices. To be successful, you can’t be sweet. To be loving and supportive, you can’t be beautiful. To be bright, you can’t be down to earth
@@Googleistheantichristthe only statement that is accurate is the first one. To be successful in a career you have to be the opposite of sweet. I experienced this as a working woman, and my husband also as a man with employees. He could not be "nice". You have to be a hard ass to get anywhere in life financially. Foe men this isn't a bad quality but a woman who is successful in her career is cut throat. I assure you. Unless she is maybe selling some items at home like cakes or homemade items.
As I’m getting older I’m taking note on the men who act like true gentlemen. No pressure for anything sexual, they enjoy talking to me and hearing what I have to say, instead of trying to shut me up (no mansplaining, lol). Yes I want someone employed and working towards their financial goals. But by no means does that mean they need to be making 6 figures. Just be responsible, have integrity and be willing to be in partnership.
Thankful that my dad taught me that even if a man doesn’t have all the money in the world, if he loves his family, he will provide. Same for the woman. As a unit you make it work.
The other part of the problem is we are just too busy. I work 100+ hours a week. Dating doesn't fit anywhere in my life.
If jobs paid and scheduled their employees better this wouldn't be as big of an issue.
This is so true!
People were busy in year 1745. VERY busy working all hours of the day farming just to get enough to eat. Having someone you see for only a few hours in the evening is actually good, because if you spend all day and night together you go crazy under each others feet.
@@3m4il Back then you had the dictates of the Church, Society and Parents to marry. But not now.
Yep agree. We are all rats on a wheel now trying to save own ass
@@3m4il ummm, that has nothing to do with what he's saying, because you're talking about feeling purpose and working, he's talking about excessive working hours coming in the way of dating.
in those times so many women were deemed witches just for applying basic intellect because they went against the church, so no, flirting wasn't really a thing even then. the church itself would condemn women for it lol
Spot on🎯
I can only see it from a guy's perspective. Before I grew up and became an adult, I was promised by society, media and school, that there was this magic thing called "love" or "romance". It would happen to everybody when they became a teenager in magical and unpredictable ways. Turned out, that it happened a bit later, when I was 17. I met a girl randomly and I lost my virginity. There was indeed some exciting years, where it was all new and both sexes were just experimenting.
Now I am 26, and hardly able to match with a girl on Tinder. I'm averagely looking, intelligent and accomplished. I should be able to find someone. But it's all about showing yourself in flashy ways, and I don't want to do that. The insane demands and superficial evaluations makes me feel completely invisible and inadequate in that area. The things that are just taken for granted by women are incredible. I feel like there is no going back. I will never be loved and appreciated for who I am, but only to the extent that I am able to produce and perform. The amount of things you have to have or do to be attractive, makes it not worth it, because you will be working all the time.
@mathias1dk
I know it sounds a bit ‘soft’ .. but whats wrong with being loved and appreciated by yourself ..
‘Outside’ affection / appreciation can mever truly be fulfilling, because its on the outside .. real love lies within
@@christopetkov4168 Nothing wrong with that, and I know there is great joy to be found when you make peace with yourself. I just have come to the conclusion that so far I am unable to compete in the sexual marketplace, I know I am not perfect, but are you supposed to be that to get a girlfriend in a well functioning society?
You said “not being appreciated and loved by just being simply who you are” - that’s tricky: Women are not supposed to give unconditional love to men (they are not your mother(s)). And believe me when a women happen to practice that “unconditional love” towards a man - it is very often ends badly for her.
I don’t know why it’s like this? Nature? Men need to be “hunters”?
So it’s like men need to be always challenged by women. Maybe it’s just their nature to only appreciate what they had to work for?..
Also. I don’t know what type of women you’re choosing. I notice many men prefer what I’d say “out of their league” and then complain to be rejected.
Why men don’t choose someone of the similar level as they are? (Financially, physically, socially)?
There are lots of great women who are “average” and who want a simple cozy life with a good “average” guy. They are realistic and their expectations are also reasonable (I don’t say you don’t have to do anything at all for the relationship to work!! ). Many women feel invisible - they don’t feel being taken seriously “in the love market”. They are willing to work for the relationship, but it should be from both sides! Since women are so frustrated already (add to it generations before them being taken an advantage of by patriarchy) - they not gonna give anything before you at least show your GOOD INTENTIONS, wiliness to communicate and “not giving up easily” mentality. Money could be a part of it, but actually not essential.
Good guy without lots of money is still better (for majority of women) than a rich abuser!
@@nataliabogdanova2816 I’m not saying that women should not demand anything from men. Of course they should. And lazy, unproductive, severely obese men should not deserve to be in a relationship. But it’s a relatively new thing, that average men are invisible.
Nobody care about if I work hard, have goals or are extremely competent. What matters is superficial symbols, an expensive car, a suit or a muscular body, many Instagram followers etc.
I feel that I am on the substance a good man, I have discipline, can extend gratification and have long term goals. None of it matters until I have visible success to show. And you just don’t have that much to show, when you are 26 years old.
I don’t aim for supermodels, I aim within my league. Seemingly these girls think they deserve men who are 2-3 points above them.
The meaning of life is love. The problem is that most people have become too egocentric and live without thinking.
Go to the gym, get fit, build your career, gain more money, develop your skill, increase your education, work on your image, cultivate a status, and you too can get a woman that does NONE of this.
You'd find a women intimidating if she does all of this.
Fortunately men fall in love with who they fall in love with. No dating up hypergamy B/S. You're not in that 30's, single, lonely group of women are you :( @@enlightenlife2840
The truth about men who give up on dating or trying to find a girlfriend is that they are lonely. They just are. And people are more lonely than ever before these days. Relationships have become this power struggle between men and women. Where if you don’t make enough money your girl is upset, if you have to work too much to make 100,000 a year your girl is up set. If your not in shape your girl is upset. What happen to a partnership against the world? A man and women should be supportive and helpful to each other! Not competitive against each other. Yet that’s exactly how a lot of women treat relationships these days. And so men give up on those relationships, but men are still lonely, and lonely men can become dangerous and not as productive
Feminism.
I really like your channel, and your guests are frikken brilliant.😊
This is spot on! 👌
A recent survey I did there wasn't a woman willing to date a guy who earned less than 50k whereas the average wage of men surveyed in the same area was 24k
Make more money. It's that simple. If you want to date a woman you should be prepared to support the children that come from that union and you're gonna need the cake. Or, alternatively you need land, a house and the ability to farm it to feed your kingdom. Doesn't HAVE to be money. But renting a little apartment and making only enough money to feed yourself is not gonna cut it. Get real.
So angry, you're not in that 30's pool of single angry feminists LOL?@@t.8936
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line 🎉
@@t.8936- Yes, it’s just that simple. Just go make more money then you can come home to a wide who bitches about how you’re never home.😂
@@t.8936 Know plenty of divorced, formerly rich jokers that disprove that theory. The milkman joke has existed for a century for a reason. It takes more than just money. Making money does get you to workmule status in a marriage, but it's not the solution to being happy in a marriage.
Another little tidbit of info for you. The statistics in the US are actually 63% of men have opted out of pursuing any kind of relationship with women, and 34% of women are now remaining decidedly single.
Insta-subbed to this channel. Keep up the good work, thank you.
When he broke character lmao when he said “Oh ShzT”!
Wow!!! 😮😮😮American Culture is potent! 2 British men, presumably in the UK, discussing the impact of a foreign law(that they don't have in their own country) on society as a whole.
The west man. The westerner culture has spread its not just Americans consuming American content.
@RagingDamage. People in many countries especially the UK find American culture ubiquitous, some feel its invasive. That's just the way it is.
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line 🎉
This trajectory should be accurate given that we are promoting independence in kids and women and men. Telling people they dont need anyone but themselves. And self love. If you say you do. They label you as codependant and weak or not enough self worth, clingy. I have been told many a times that i am clingy. Possessive. To be honest i think everyone is they just arent telling the truth and playing hard to get. But behind the scene they stalk their gf or crush or do just as much. But they jusf say, i dont need anyone just to seem cool or to feed off their ego .but its not actually true.
if men were to also become highly selective and refuse to settle for any woman who is financially struggling, it could potentially shift the power dynamics and restore balance. Unfortunately men are often too desperate and willing to overlook financial stability and low morals in order to find a partner. No more burger king bitches 😂 Don't settle for anyone who found you at the finish line ❤
Have faith. Work on yourself. Be a good person. Love is possible. But not guaranteed.