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My Native American grandparents are the only people in my life that understand this and love me unconditionally. They understand and sooth all of my emotions. I love them so much
I'm surprised people would say this video is full of anger or crap. I didn't get any vibes of anger, even when looking for it. In my opinion, everything she says has been supported by my own childhood experience AND my college studies as a Psychology major. There's a current within the field of Psychology that is moving in the direction she advocates. Where the focus is validation and healthy processing of emotions. I think this is a great video, very well articulated!
The things she says definetly comes from experience in emotional level, and it comes very strong. also the reason why shes so skilled in the matter is very high probability that abusive childhood is been strongly present in her life, and shes is trying to change the future so other people wouldnt suffer same enviroment she did, and by this would lead to healthy life in physical and in emotional level to future generation.
This stuff is way beyond what Academics have to offer. Most of what i have learned, that has really helped to transform my life, is the stuff thats NOT taught in School, and likely never will be.
I feel as if I can't express myself towards my family. I've suppressed alot of anger and frustration because of them. They don't wanna hear how I feel. I came from a physical healthy home but not from an emotionally healthy home.
Validate your own feelings first and that will allow you to voice your opinions and feelings without that need to feel like they have to respond a certain way or validate it. Dismissal is just an easy way that ultimately we were taught by our parents so it is a subconscious thing they don't even most likely know what they're doing. But ultimately do the want to deal with it and don't want to take responsibility for what they have or haven't given you... Bless 😍😍😍. Your strong , don't let them make you feel weak. You are allowed to feel and think how ever you want and also everyone has different perceptions so it's important to know that not everyone is going to understand the same experience in the same way... Hope that helps.
I have to add that excepting the situation is important as well in order to move forward in an emotionally healthy way, in order to not keep repeating the same cycle. You have to expand your knowledge on these topics and understand the physchology of it all in order to not take somethings personal, for example now when my mom says things to me like "your stressing me out" ... I'm not doing anything and she's blaming how she feels on me. It can be super manipulating and confusing if you don't understand your own feelings and the way people perceive that other people are effecting them when in fact you have the ability to feel how ever you are feeling based on your thoughts and actions. Parents and family don't always and should always hold unconditional love for you, no matter what and not make you feel like there's something wrong with you.
phillyfan182 Same. I’m 27 and just now getting the courage to post something as simple as a comment. Because I always needed validation on what was good enough to say/post. Being shutdown made me a complicated person because I would put so much effort into covering up who I am. It feels so good and I have never felt so free on this journey to saying how TF I feel without asking if it is okay to do so. I no longer keep people around that do not accept me fully. More of these discussions should be had. Because a good bit of society is emotionally and relationally sick and don’t even know it.
Ohh man.. ! I bawled my eyes out listening to this! I was always so lonely as a child and still I feel like such am outcast around my family. No one paid attention to me, or they dismissed how I felt. earlier tonight, i confessed this to my mother and was told I only felt that way because I'm insecure and it's all my head. I too have been guilty of being dismissive of my son's feelings, I had no idea what I was doing. never again! I feel like I should watch this video every day until I remember the process ood emotional encouragement every time he had an emotional reaction. hopefully it's not too late. :(
distortia47 it's never too late. Just you finding this and making the initial steps is an amazing feat. Your adversity is often your greatest gift. You can put it into practice now, now is all we have. 🌬💕
You are only using the tools you were given and the fact that you are taking responsibility and seeking new and improved tools means you are on the right path. You are loved and you must love yourself more and this will allow you to be the best mom you have the power to be. You're doing great, awareness is the first step. Seek your truth & trust yourself. 😍😍😍🙏 if and when you do make mistakes don't forget to apologize for them and this will be a healthy way to learn from your mistakes as well as teaching your child that a) everybody makes mistakes and b) you love him. I just want to let you know that I working on being a better mother myself and there are days where I was rude to my daughter and I told her that it is not her fault when Mom is in a bad mood and for example when I apologize for yelling I would say I'm just sad and I'm sorry that I took it out on you. Emphasizing that it was not her fault. And now when Daddy gets mad I say the same thing that Daddy just in a bad mood and that it's not her fault. because kids literally feel helpless when they're constantly treated badly just because somebody is in a bad mood and then they take that internally and feel like it's their fault and so that's where this cycle keeps happening in parents and children relationships so as long as we're able to take responsibility for when we're not treating somebody the right way just because we don't feel good about ourselves then we're doing better and better on improving ourselves and relationships.
I have the same experience with my parents, but yr parent would make me doubt if she would tell me I am insecure and it is my own fault. Yr mum is still invalidating yr emotions as she continue's to tell you it is yr problem and you have to adress it(insecurity) Parents seem to want to have children that are NEVER disturbed by anything and able to cope without looking for support and validation. My parents are more insecure themselves(but hiding it behind a mask) I wish you the very best especially with this tough mother of yours
It’s sad to witness, but it’s not as though things were any better before. We are on a forward trajectory in our evolution as a species, learning moment by moment and century by century what it means to be fully be human. We are just in that process
Never be ashamed of how you feel. This is something I've been trying to understand since starting this growth mindset journey. I use to be ashamed of what I did, then ashamed of how I felt for what I did, and then ashamed for having an emotion of any kind towards my actions because "what would others think?", that maybe I'm not hard enough on myself. But I now know I have every right to feel the way I do. When people tell me not to think about something I explain that I have been running away from my emotions for too long. Every time I have an intense emotional reaction I realize its a chance for immense self-growth and self-development. For any emotion, no one can ever make me forget about it or tell me to leave it alone because in the end when I do the emotional and spiritual work I will come out much more formidable than I ever was....and that my spiel^^
Here's the silver lining, Teal couldn't be who she is today had she not gone through abuse and trauma, same goes for every single one of us, celebrate the victory!
She's not who she is because she went through trauma, she is this way because she is emotionally healthier than most people BECAUSE she succeeded at healing most of her wounds. It's not that the trauma made her like this, it's her willingness to heal and to have had the actual tools to heal. It's not true that if a kid is traumatized they'll grow into wise and wonderful people, many stay fucked up for a long part of their lives struggling with it. That's the majority and the majority doesn't even know they do have a problem or where it comes from, let alone heal. I am sure we could have way more wise and emotionally stable adults if our education system was overhauled. She didn't become wise because of the trauma, she became wise in spite of it, in my opinion. Having a big trauma generally creates intense desire to be healed and hence why usually people who have been abused/traumatized exceptionally heavy tend to be the ones who heal themselves. But what about the majority who doesn't even know their childhood was actually traumatizing? They're gonna suffer all their lives and not even know why and possibly not ever healing. Traumas are not a good thing and we don't need pain and suffering to learn, in my opinion.
How could a person be so wise at such a young age. that's right you're in extrasensory there is absolutely no doubt about it anybody that thinks that's not true is unenlightened
Emotional abuse can be so subtle that it can be happening right in clear view of others, yet completely overlooked, dismissed, or in the worst case, provoked further by "friends" and family. There is nothing more devasting than being mocked and belittled while suffering deep emotional pain. There needs to be an emotional wake-up call and this video provides some very hard truths that need to be faced. Teal Swan, this is some of the best advice I have ever heard and I hope your message reaches those who would hear the truth. Thank you for being so brave, strong, fragile, and beautiful. Love and blessings.
Steps that can help us relate to other peoples' negative emotions (starting at 19:11): 1. To become aware of the other person's emotion 2. To care about the other person's emotion by seeing it as valid and important 3. To listen empathetically to the other person's emotion in an attempt to understand the way they feel 4. To acknowledge and validate their feelings 5. To allow the person to feel how they feel and to experience their emotions fully before moving towards any kind of improvement in the way that they feel (show unconditional presence to them, show support without trying to fix them) 6. After, and only after their feelings have been validated and acknowledged and fully felt, help the other person to strategize ways to manage the reactions they might be having to their emotion.
My girlfriend turned me on to Teal and I'm so glad she did. Life awareness and personal uplifting videos paves a way for a better living. Thanks Deborah my Babe!!
This video changed the way i see the whole world and its problems at large. Due to inadequate parenting we are faced with a society with serious character flaws, insecurities, and inadequate leadership. Everyone is just after sense gratification, failing to see the true meaning of human life which is to be peaceful and giving and cherish all the facilities we have to evolve spiritually. It's a shame that most people don't realize this. People's ignorance costs innocent lives. Thank you so much for uploading this video, your so full of clarity.
This is amazing Teal! You are a revolutionary woman in the emotional field. This is the future of a better society 😊. Thank you Teal for sharing so much knowledge.
I love that Teal is so intellectual and beautiful and innovative and fierce in her purpose. I don't know about you but Teal is the proof of spirit. Teal for president!
People are selfish cunts for having kids. Not because they want to watch the child grow to be their own beautiful self expression but to offload their pain onto them, beat them down then laugh at them for being even weaker than they are.
I think you should write a book teaching people about the damage that emotional abuse can affect people sometimes for a lifetime. A lot of mental professionals don’t see it this way.
I love Teal's point about validating our own emotions. So often we are able to be supportive & validate another's emotions, but we don't do that for ourselves. Thank-you Teal for your insight.
You say it isnt great to tell other people how to feel. But as an adult, I enjoy building people up and saying positive words to help a positive feeling come to a person. If a person looks really sad, I automatically want to send a tiny burst of light and joy to help. Im trying not to people please too much but I really do care about others. I am practicing unconditional self love first, to see what comes from that =))) Thanks for sharing your light
This video is like a story telling of my childhood, it never was physical abuse, it was unconscious emotional abuse from my parents that had the same path to professor and society in general. Thank you Tale for bringing this topic that still affects humanity at its large. 🌛🌟🌞❤️
It's as if Teal has been "renting space" in my mind, pulling all my thoughts and emotions together to research this episode. This discussion covers so much of my emotional issues and opinions; I'm overwhelmingly validated in hearing this. I feel so alone in my perceptions about emotions because everyone around me appears to be out of touch. I could go on and on on how emotionally starved I am; and I'm NOT ashamed to admit it...I am an emotional being!! And I love myself for it; I know this world needs more ppl like me; we are all hurting and primarily due to the inability or shame of admitting we are "feeling" some type of way. I pray for all of us that we free ourselves and open up to our emotions...and this video is an awesome start to that process. Beautiful msg Teal...thank u!!
I'm right there with you girl. On many of nights I have cried wondering why I have such strong emotions and feelings and others seem to be so disconnected.
+A. Tunson When you come to think about it your mind & her mind is based from the universe of consciousness. so as 3rd dimensional beings we are cut off sort of speak at birth from the what she calls the expanding universe but only in part. She is Linking the missing parts of the puzzle IMO c];-D
Amanda Riley Aww, it's nice to hear someone else feels that way about being so emotional. I've seen it as such a weakness over the years; but only bcuz I was seeing it that way! Now, I feel honored to be amongst the truly enlightened ones...the ones who feel life vs. just watch it pass by!!
My parents also believed in discipining the children - withdrawing love.... - that 's why I watch your videos - and they are very helpful.... God knows - we are all sparks of God and therefore help each other to realize the truth - each and every one in his own way...
In these many years I was wandering to get to know why I am afraid of being open and intimate with people. I could see everything clear from the way beginning of my childhood. My emotions and feelings had been rejected from childhood because my mom was suffering certain mental issues. I suppressed my feelings and often ignored it. I am in tears now because I could find you Teal swan. You have no idea how these videos are helping me. Sending you the love and prayers from the bottom of my heart. Thank you Teal swan. 🙏🙏🙏
Just turned 18 and I feel so emotionally unbalanced because of trauma I've experienced from my childhood up until last year. and its no ones responsibility but my own to heal. My happiness and healing are MY responsibility and no one elses. I felt like now was the right time to work on myself although its long overdue. Sometimes I feel like I'm too old or running out of time and I know that comes from a place of fear. I didn't even realize one of my biggest issues is seeking validation from those I will never get it from. And seeking validation from others like I have been isn't healthy, or doing me any favors. Working on it. Thank you so much, Teal for all of the videos. They are incredibly healing and helpful ✨💙
I am 54, and I am on the same journey as you. I hope you are still working on your emotions. This is a lifelong journey. Anytime you do it is the right time.
I agree been saying this for years still living in the dark ages of parenting. I still see people want that obedient child who will not question anything this is is why a lot of them grow up with tons of issues yet nobody isn't willing to do anything to fix the issue. I have been told for years how my emotions/feelings don't matter to just suck it up, deal with it etc by telling someone like that just like Teal said teaching someone to dismiss their own emotions. On the same token, the one who dismissed your emotions shouldn't be the same one asking you to be vulunerable when they just dismissed your emotions. You can't say be open yet shut up and suck it up that is conflicting and sends the wrong message to someone.
Thank you Teal. My mother denied my feelings and emotions as part of her emotional abuse. Twice in my life, she gave me a book called "do not trust your emotions." She never cared about how I feel, only about creating stories to vilify me as the scapegoat of the family. My first memory of her denying my feelings and instead- lying to everyone- I was only 3 yrs. old, it continues today as "smear campaigns" against me. You are SO correct: the most difficult thing to work through/heal from is emotional abuse. Please do a video about ComplexPTSD and also about NPD (narcissistic personality disorder in parents-- it is such a difficult family dysfunction to deal with). Thank you for focusing on emotional abuse. Blessings
@@helovashot3862 Thank you- I did sign up for a one- on one with her about 4 years ago and she was absolutely awful in person - I do not recommend her at all. I did find a great source: Richard Grannon - highly recommend him (also here on YT). Thank you for caring Helov
I just might have to say thank you for this topic and I am very sure that you are more aware of what is the truth of what is going on in our present now is the same thing as I have been hearing you speak about since I first saw you.
I have been told all my life that I am too emotional. It drives me crazy cause I cannot change it. I have however learned more about my emotions & what triggers which over the years. I get emotional over everything. If you don't notice my emotions over something than it has to be cause I don't know about it lol it kinda makes me wonder when I don't see emotions in others.
This video is absolutely amazing. This is the type of stuff we should of learned about in school! I’m 39 years old and I am just finally understanding to accept and feel my emotions. It’s the heartbeat of relationships. I thank you so much for your extensive videos on these topics that are so vital. Many blessings to you. From the core of my being I thank you. ❤️🙏🙏❤️
My parents would punish me if I was good especially if I was standing up for someone they were hitting or trying to be a peace maker. I can't be the only one. Thank you Teal, you have opened my eyes to how messed up my scapegoated childhood really was.....
I came from the other video (How to Stop Caring What Other People Think). I'm glad I watched this video. From childhood on up, people have told me I'm 'too sensitive'. I'm an adult now and find myself struggling with a lot of challenges. After watching your videos, though, I realize what the root of the problem is and how it relates to my current issues. Thank you so much for shredding some light. At least it's a starting point for me. From there, I can find ways to overcome my challenges.
I think I have never been more understood in my life, I'm so glad and excited to be able to listen to Teal's videos. It has such soothing effect on my soul - I'm really grateful for being acknowledged
How can anybody disagree with what this woman is saying right now??? If you do, find the root cause of that disagreement, analyze it, and respond with respect and a genuine want for answers. This has helped me on my spiritual journey where I have come to think that cutting my emotions will help me get a better grip of self when in fact that is the opposite. wow.. We really did invent the internet to find ourselves.
Love this SO SO much. Emotional health IS health. I can't wait to see how the increase in understanding of emotional health and 'emotional intelligence' transforms parenting culture, after the emotional dark ages come to an end...
I have been binging Teal videos over the past month. they always seem to be recommend to me at the right time. (I couldn't help but be tickled to see my current city, Victoria (British Columbia), in the video at 1:43. In the distance, we see the Empress Hotel with the Canadian flag.)
I love how Teal not only understands what is going on with emotions, but offers really good practical advice on how to deal with them in a healthy way.
Wouldn't say that I would ever watch a video on a spiritual channel but this video was exactly what I needed to hear right now. Everything resonated with me on a deep level.
This is so deep. I'm so grateful of watching this video. I have taken tons of notes and going back and forth, making sure I didn't miss anything. Thank you so much Teal. 🙏🙏🙏
Ok so I was raised in a physically fine, but emotionally co-dependent environment. Thing is now I see it all came from all the best intentions and love available at the time. aka...Not everyone learns how to give and receive unconditional love in this lifetime...but everyone has the potential ♻️
This is such an amazing video on so many levels. I spent many years in the church, and one thing they teach is don't trust your emotions and don't trust your feelings, trust God. Have fellowship with people you don't resonate with, just because they're Christians too. Since coming away from the church, I can now see how rigid, analytical and judgemental many of the people are - ironically especially the women, because they've suppressed their feminine energy, in order to survive in a man's world - which I came to realise the church is. Over past year I've become more empowered and energised since trusting my emotions and feelings.
Profound video with a profound effect on me. Ty ma'am. I believe you're helping me from afar in a way that noone has. I feel like I'm slowly letting down my wall. To have someone define how I feel to a Tee is amazing. The isolation is dissipating. The gifts God gave you to probe into a damaged person is unreal & I hope he blesses you tenfold.
Time outs can cause great damage too, honestly. It made me feel abandoned and rejected and left me to my own devices to regulate my emotions (which I could not yet do, so this caused a lot of damage). I'm still working through this today, trying to undo the damage my parents did to me by shoving me away whenever I showed an emotion they perceived as negative.
I wish I could hug you! I’ve been trying to figure myself out and a lot of my thoughts were confirmed through you. Thank you love and blessings to you!
I just want to say thank you because you helped me understand myself and also helped me understand how to be a good parent cause I myself disapprove of my sons emotions and you helped me to know that ,that is wrong and I am glad that he is still young so I can try to undo all the damage I had already caused 😞
Absolutely healing video. Teal's voice can be felt as coming from her heart, the heart of every human who has suffered emotionally in some way in some point in their lives. I sometimes wish i could go back in time and heal everything i did wrong, everytime i couldnt hold a person i loved, everytime i couldnt be there 100% supporting them and my own growth as a whole man in the process. They say we learn through error, and hopefully we all are transcending to an age where we can learn from unraveling like this beautiful blossoming of nature's intelligence.
Just heard previously from teal, it took parents until the 1600's before the understood the concept of reward/punishment to raise their kids. An awakening about the true nature of a child's mind and behavior. Now, 2022, we are at the cusp of realizing the emotionality of our own existence as "sentient" adult human beings. The wheels of time and conciseness move very very slowly. Be patient, my friend. Dos Equis. 🌝
Words fail me, except to say that you're a global treasure. As one who struggles with gratitude and humility, no problems here and now. Thank you indeed!
This helped me be aware of my immedite reaction to try to give advice to my partner and friends without truly taking moments to vlaidate their emotions because mine were never acknowledged, considered or given advice so I thought advice was what I was supposed to do and as I go back into memories, I'm realizing it's been slowly alienating them from feelign ocmfortable telling me their emotions. Idk if i explained this well but long story short, thank you .
That "Spare the rod spoil the child" BS came out of a misunderstanding of Psalms 23's actually loving verbiage, "Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me." Rather than being used to whack the sheep into submission, a shepherd uses the straight end of the rod to guide the sheep and the hooked end to get sheep unstuck from between boulders where they may have wandered. The (still current) understanding of the rod as an instrument of beatings promoted by the bible, belays a primitive mindset many Christians and others still hold of a God who arbitrarily rains down punishment at will. In addition to the miseducation of our ancestors, this belief that God cannot be trusted has also done humanity a world of harm. Hopefully we're getting smarter as a race. Thank you Teal 💕😇❤
My heart breaks for me... As I continue on my 56 year journey to heal and grow, this just breaks my huge heart for the little girl I was, who endured.... Despite herself. Thank you, Teal. I resonate so much with who you are
This is how I parent and it is not only liberated my children but it’s also taught me the simplicity of not controlling my emotions with the mind. Now I accept myself as I am and allow both old emotions and new emotions to flow freely without analysis/judgement/criticism. Life changing expansion….
I’m crying here at the 23 mins mark… about doing things to ‘be there’ for the other person be it emotionally being available to understand how they feel or helping them with dishes, other chores as opposed to having to be asked to do these things to touching them, hugging them telling them that they matter!
this really made me feel much better !! im 18 years old and all my parents do is scream at me and never try to listen to me when i talk . everytime i want to talk to my mom shes busy watching tv or talking on the phone . she never makes time for me or ever asks me how i feel. when me and my little sister fight she assumes its me and screams at me , never once has she asked me how i feel or what happened . i try to explain myself but she starts screaming at me and saying she doesnt care , its very annoying
po7378 I'm 60 & I can still remember how I was treated just like you are being treated. I was always being spanked, scolded, or accused of something I didn't do. And insulted too but I survived with prayer & rebellious ways i guess😳
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My Native American grandparents are the only people in my life that understand this and love me unconditionally. They understand and sooth all of my emotions. I love them so much
so lucky!
@@我爱埃伦 Luck is an illusion, if you really want something, go for it!!
Um; Don't beam me up yet Scotty; I just found intelligent life on earth... Her name is Teal Swan!!! There still is hope for humanity.
Namaste Tim Overdier 1 year ago
Curious how you may be feeling today about humanity and what your thoughts are. Any new thoughts to share?
Tim Overdier Hell yea lol
Hahaha. You`re right. There is hope for the human race after all. Sadly though, Teal Swans are few and far between.
The famous phrase "Beam me up Scotty" no longer exists anywhere in the series due to the Mandela Effect.
The first thing I thought was you knew Teals family name is Scott. So, beam me up Teal Scotty :) :) :)
I'm surprised people would say this video is full of anger or crap. I didn't get any vibes of anger, even when looking for it. In my opinion, everything she says has been supported by my own childhood experience AND my college studies as a Psychology major. There's a current within the field of Psychology that is moving in the direction she advocates. Where the focus is validation and healthy processing of emotions. I think this is a great video, very well articulated!
The things she says definetly comes from experience in emotional level, and it comes very strong. also the reason why shes so skilled in the matter is very high probability that abusive childhood is been strongly present in her life, and shes is trying to change the future so other people wouldnt suffer same enviroment she did, and by this would lead to healthy life in physical and in emotional level to future generation.
wow, the psychology department is moving in a sensible way(in usa anyway)
@@piuli95 she's over it, just tired of it like the rest of us
This stuff is way beyond what Academics have to offer. Most of what i have learned, that has really helped to transform my life, is the stuff thats NOT taught in School, and likely never will be.
I think the nice thing about this video is that each person receives the underlying message that they need the most from it
She is definitely a Warrior of the light. Enigmatic and hypnotic glow of eyes, calming voice, intelligence, extrasensory perception, sense of beauty.
“Emotion is the language of the soul” oh that hit me, so beautiful 🙏🏼👁🧬
~2:00
Thats very hard for me to comprehend
Why are we assuming that africans have the same emotional intelligence as Europeans though? Science is not wrong...
This needs millions of views.
More like 420 million
KushLoveEntertainmentBitches
KushLoveEntertainmentBitches
7.8 billion views at least as I have needed at least 3 times watching it to get all the valuable info in there
CynicalIdealist 💜💜💜
I feel as if I can't express myself towards my family. I've suppressed alot of anger and frustration because of them. They don't wanna hear how I feel. I came from a physical healthy home but not from an emotionally healthy home.
phillyfan182 me too 😔 all of this
Validate your own feelings first and that will allow you to voice your opinions and feelings without that need to feel like they have to respond a certain way or validate it. Dismissal is just an easy way that ultimately we were taught by our parents so it is a subconscious thing they don't even most likely know what they're doing. But ultimately do the want to deal with it and don't want to take responsibility for what they have or haven't given you... Bless 😍😍😍. Your strong , don't let them make you feel weak. You are allowed to feel and think how ever you want and also everyone has different perceptions so it's important to know that not everyone is going to understand the same experience in the same way... Hope that helps.
I have to add that excepting the situation is important as well in order to move forward in an emotionally healthy way, in order to not keep repeating the same cycle. You have to expand your knowledge on these topics and understand the physchology of it all in order to not take somethings personal, for example now when my mom says things to me like "your stressing me out" ... I'm not doing anything and she's blaming how she feels on me. It can be super manipulating and confusing if you don't understand your own feelings and the way people perceive that other people are effecting them when in fact you have the ability to feel how ever you are feeling based on your thoughts and actions.
Parents and family don't always and should always hold unconditional love for you, no matter what and not make you feel like there's something wrong with you.
Welcome to the family ;)
phillyfan182 Same. I’m 27 and just now getting the courage to post something as simple as a comment. Because I always needed validation on what was good enough to say/post. Being shutdown made me a complicated person because I would put so much effort into covering up who I am. It feels so good and I have never felt so free on this journey to saying how TF I feel without asking if it is okay to do so. I no longer keep people around that do not accept me fully. More of these discussions should be had. Because a good bit of society is emotionally and relationally sick and don’t even know it.
Ohh man.. ! I bawled my eyes out listening to this! I was always so lonely as a child and still I feel like such am outcast around my family. No one paid attention to me, or they dismissed how I felt. earlier tonight, i confessed this to my mother and was told I only felt that way because I'm insecure and it's all my head.
I too have been guilty of being dismissive of my son's feelings, I had no idea what I was doing. never again! I feel like I should watch this video every day until I remember the process ood emotional encouragement every time he had an emotional reaction. hopefully it's not too late. :(
distortia47 it's never too late. Just you finding this and making the initial steps is an amazing feat. Your adversity is often your greatest gift. You can put it into practice now, now is all we have. 🌬💕
You are only using the tools you were given and the fact that you are taking responsibility and seeking new and improved tools means you are on the right path. You are loved and you must love yourself more and this will allow you to be the best mom you have the power to be. You're doing great, awareness is the first step. Seek your truth & trust yourself. 😍😍😍🙏
if and when you do make mistakes don't forget to apologize for them and this will be a healthy way to learn from your mistakes as well as teaching your child that a) everybody makes mistakes and b) you love him. I just want to let you know that I working on being a better mother myself and there are days where I was rude to my daughter and I told her that it is not her fault when Mom is in a bad mood and for example when I apologize for yelling I would say I'm just sad and I'm sorry that I took it out on you. Emphasizing that it was not her fault. And now when Daddy gets mad I say the same thing that Daddy just in a bad mood and that it's not her fault. because kids literally feel helpless when they're constantly treated badly just because somebody is in a bad mood and then they take that internally and feel like it's their fault and so that's where this cycle keeps happening in parents and children relationships so as long as we're able to take responsibility for when we're not treating somebody the right way just because we don't feel good about ourselves then we're doing better and better on improving ourselves and relationships.
I have the same experience with my parents, but yr parent would make me doubt if she would tell me I am insecure and it is my own fault. Yr mum is still invalidating yr emotions as she continue's to tell you it is yr problem and you have to adress it(insecurity) Parents seem to want to have children that are NEVER disturbed by anything and able to cope without looking for support and validation. My parents are more insecure themselves(but hiding it behind a mask) I wish you the very best especially with this tough mother of yours
You got this!
Blessings your way, we are all learning. It was an eye opener for me to. Will have to rewatch it many times over.
I just realized when Teal said we really don't know what to do with emotions. It's THAT serious. I knew but still it's disappointing how we got here.
It’s sad to witness, but it’s not as though things were any better before. We are on a forward trajectory in our evolution as a species, learning moment by moment and century by century what it means to be fully be human. We are just in that process
Good point
I love you for making this teal. I feel like my life is about to change.
royce m did it change?
royce m I hope it changed for you!
@@Alchemyforthesoul h
Did your life changed?
Me too!!
Never be ashamed of how you feel. This is something I've been trying to understand since starting this growth mindset journey. I use to be ashamed of what I did, then ashamed of how I felt for what I did, and then ashamed for having an emotion of any kind towards my actions because "what would others think?", that maybe I'm not hard enough on myself. But I now know I have every right to feel the way I do. When people tell me not to think about something I explain that I have been running away from my emotions for too long. Every time I have an intense emotional reaction I realize its a chance for immense self-growth and self-development. For any emotion, no one can ever make me forget about it or tell me to leave it alone because in the end when I do the emotional and spiritual work I will come out much more formidable than I ever was....and that my spiel^^
Infinite love and gratitude!!!🙏 ❤
Here's the silver lining, Teal couldn't be who she is today had she not gone through abuse and trauma, same goes for every single one of us, celebrate the victory!
She's not who she is because she went through trauma, she is this way because she is emotionally healthier than most people BECAUSE she succeeded at healing most of her wounds. It's not that the trauma made her like this, it's her willingness to heal and to have had the actual tools to heal. It's not true that if a kid is traumatized they'll grow into wise and wonderful people, many stay fucked up for a long part of their lives struggling with it. That's the majority and the majority doesn't even know they do have a problem or where it comes from, let alone heal. I am sure we could have way more wise and emotionally stable adults if our education system was overhauled. She didn't become wise because of the trauma, she became wise in spite of it, in my opinion. Having a big trauma generally creates intense desire to be healed and hence why usually people who have been abused/traumatized exceptionally heavy tend to be the ones who heal themselves. But what about the majority who doesn't even know their childhood was actually traumatizing? They're gonna suffer all their lives and not even know why and possibly not ever healing. Traumas are not a good thing and we don't need pain and suffering to learn, in my opinion.
@@blue_sky_bright_sun7599 im glad someone said this !!!!
@@blue_sky_bright_sun7599 Well spoken! 👊🏻❤️
How could a person be so wise at such a young age. that's right you're in extrasensory there is absolutely no doubt about it anybody that thinks that's not true is unenlightened
Thanks Teal. You deserve the Nobel prize of Peace
Fr
Emotional abuse can be so subtle that it can be happening right in clear view of others, yet completely overlooked, dismissed, or in the worst case, provoked further by "friends" and family. There is nothing more devasting than being mocked and belittled while suffering deep emotional pain. There needs to be an emotional wake-up call and this video provides some very hard truths that need to be faced. Teal Swan, this is some of the best advice I have ever heard and I hope your message reaches those who would hear the truth. Thank you for being so brave, strong, fragile, and beautiful. Love and blessings.
Steps that can help us relate to other peoples' negative emotions (starting at 19:11):
1. To become aware of the other person's emotion
2. To care about the other person's emotion by seeing it as valid and important
3. To listen empathetically to the other person's emotion in an attempt to understand the way they feel
4. To acknowledge and validate their feelings
5. To allow the person to feel how they feel and to experience their emotions fully before moving towards any kind of improvement in the way that they feel (show unconditional presence to them, show support without trying to fix them)
6. After, and only after their feelings have been validated and acknowledged and fully felt, help the other person to strategize ways to manage the reactions they might be having to their emotion.
I went back to this video looking for a comment like this, thank you so much.
My girlfriend turned me on to Teal and I'm so glad she did. Life awareness and personal uplifting videos paves a way for a better living. Thanks Deborah my Babe!!
This brings me a smile on my face 🤗🤗🤗 wish you both the happiness, the lives these souls are meant to be ❤️❤️❤️ sending love
if we could get Teal teachings in all the schools...imagine the world!
I am so glad that she mentioned laughter and play as being important
This video changed the way i see the whole world and its problems at large. Due to inadequate parenting we are faced with a society with serious character flaws, insecurities, and inadequate leadership. Everyone is just after sense gratification, failing to see the true meaning of human life which is to be peaceful and giving and cherish all the facilities we have to evolve spiritually. It's a shame that most people don't realize this. People's ignorance costs innocent lives. Thank you so much for uploading this video, your so full of clarity.
Wherever you came from, Teal- your teachings are very important for the ignorance that prevails here.
This is amazing Teal! You are a revolutionary woman in the emotional field. This is the future of a better society 😊. Thank you Teal for sharing so much knowledge.
I love that Teal is so intellectual and beautiful and innovative and fierce in her purpose. I don't know about you but Teal is the proof of spirit. Teal for president!
Gosh, one realizes how much humans abused their offsprings, and still do even when the methods changed.
a lot of people shouldnt have kids!!
People are selfish cunts for having kids. Not because they want to watch the child grow to be their own beautiful self expression but to offload their pain onto them, beat them down then laugh at them for being even weaker than they are.
so true
I think you should write a book teaching people about the damage that emotional abuse can affect people sometimes for a lifetime. A lot of mental professionals don’t see it this way.
oh Teal, you are the bright future of this world!!! thank you so much for all the effort!
8 years ago.... needed this then but here we are...
I love Teal's point about validating our own emotions. So often we are able to be supportive & validate another's emotions, but we don't do that for ourselves. Thank-you Teal for your insight.
If you came here from Teals video on instagram today, you’re the realest
😎
I hope she keeps including example scenarios with parents and children. So good.
and i swear in her recent few videos she has a glow about her...
You say it isnt great to tell other people how to feel. But as an adult, I enjoy building people up and saying positive words to help a positive feeling come to a person. If a person looks really sad, I automatically want to send a tiny burst of light and joy to help. Im trying not to people please too much but I really do care about others. I am practicing unconditional self love first, to see what comes from that =)))
Thanks for sharing your light
This video is like a story telling of my childhood, it never was physical abuse, it was unconscious emotional abuse from my parents that had the same path to professor and society in general. Thank you Tale for bringing this topic that still affects humanity at its large. 🌛🌟🌞❤️
From a baby you can start naming the emotions of your child. By doing this they learn to name their emotions as they grow older.
It's as if Teal has been "renting space" in my mind, pulling all my thoughts and emotions together to research this episode. This discussion covers so much of my emotional issues and opinions; I'm overwhelmingly validated in hearing this. I feel so alone in my perceptions about emotions because everyone around me appears to be out of touch. I could go on and on on how emotionally starved I am; and I'm NOT ashamed to admit it...I am an emotional being!! And I love myself for it; I know this world needs more ppl like me; we are all hurting and primarily due to the inability or shame of admitting we are "feeling" some type of way. I pray for all of us that we free ourselves and open up to our emotions...and this video is an awesome start to that process. Beautiful msg Teal...thank u!!
Thanx LUA D'AMOR for reading my comment; have you been following Teal for some time or new to her talks?
LUA D'AMOR Yes she has definitely changed my perception on a lot of meaningful elements of myself. Thank u for the kind words; much peace to u! :)
I'm right there with you girl. On many of nights I have cried wondering why I have such strong emotions and feelings and others seem to be so disconnected.
+A. Tunson When you come to think about it your mind & her mind is based from the universe of consciousness. so as 3rd dimensional beings we are cut off sort of speak at birth from the what she calls the expanding universe but only in part. She is Linking the missing parts of the puzzle IMO c];-D
Amanda Riley Aww, it's nice to hear someone else feels that way about being so emotional. I've seen it as such a weakness over the years; but only bcuz I was seeing it that way! Now, I feel honored to be amongst the truly enlightened ones...the ones who feel life vs. just watch it pass by!!
Good one
They should use this one in schools for kids and teens
Teal's giggle haha.. such a quirky and unique humour. I love you Teal Swan. Thank you for everything you share, the clarity and the guidance. xo
Teal swan is a breath of fresh truth and love and I feel much gratitude towards her because she's making life and how people act make sence
This was pure gold! I had to take out my notebook and write it all down.
Me too!!
My parents also believed in discipining the children - withdrawing love.... - that 's why I watch your videos - and they are very helpful.... God knows - we are all sparks of God and therefore help each other to realize the truth - each and every one in his own way...
In these many years I was wandering to get to know why I am afraid of being open and intimate with people. I could see everything clear from the way beginning of my childhood. My emotions and feelings had been rejected from childhood because my mom was suffering certain mental issues. I suppressed my feelings and often ignored it. I am in tears now because I could find you Teal swan. You have no idea how these videos are helping me. Sending you the love and prayers from the bottom of my heart. Thank you Teal swan. 🙏🙏🙏
This is by far your best video
No wonder we're All so messed up!!!
Thank you Teal
Just turned 18 and I feel so emotionally unbalanced because of trauma I've experienced from my childhood up until last year. and its no ones responsibility but my own to heal. My happiness and healing are MY responsibility and no one elses. I felt like now was the right time to work on myself although its long overdue. Sometimes I feel like I'm too old or running out of time and I know that comes from a place of fear. I didn't even realize one of my biggest issues is seeking validation from those I will never get it from. And seeking validation from others like I have been isn't healthy, or doing me any favors. Working on it. Thank you so much, Teal for all of the videos. They are incredibly healing and helpful ✨💙
I am 54, and I am on the same journey as you. I hope you are still working on your emotions. This is a lifelong journey. Anytime you do it is the right time.
@@gardenlover9663 that’s so beautiful, thank you so much. That means a lot 💗💗 Good luck on your journey ✨
@@Isafoodie 🥰
This is some amazing advice, so many problems could be solved if the world understood this.
Invaluable!!!! already watch this one twice in one sitting, and have shared it with family and friends. Thank you Teal ❤💐
I agree been saying this for years still living in the dark ages of parenting. I still see people want that obedient child who will not question anything this is is why a lot of them grow up with tons of issues yet nobody isn't willing to do anything to fix the issue. I have been told for years how my emotions/feelings don't matter to just suck it up, deal with it etc by telling someone like that just like Teal said teaching someone to dismiss their own emotions.
On the same token, the one who dismissed your emotions shouldn't be the same one asking you to be vulunerable when they just dismissed your emotions. You can't say be open yet shut up and suck it up that is conflicting and sends the wrong message to someone.
"dark ages of parenting" - wow this is just spot on!
That is a form of gaslighting. They invalidate your emotion but at the same time ask you to be vulnerable
Thank you Teal.
My mother denied my feelings and emotions as part of her emotional abuse.
Twice in my life, she gave me a book called "do not trust your emotions."
She never cared about how I feel, only about creating stories to vilify me as the scapegoat of the family.
My first memory of her denying my feelings and instead- lying to everyone- I was only 3 yrs. old, it continues today as "smear campaigns" against me.
You are SO correct: the most difficult thing to work through/heal from is emotional abuse.
Please do a video about ComplexPTSD and also about NPD (narcissistic personality disorder in parents-- it is such a difficult family dysfunction to deal with).
Thank you for focusing on emotional abuse.
Blessings
Lisa A. Romano (?) does helpful videos like that about parents. Hope you've found some already
@@helovashot3862 Thank you- I did sign up for a one- on one with her about 4 years ago and she was absolutely awful in person - I do not recommend her at all. I did find a great source: Richard Grannon - highly recommend him (also here on YT). Thank you for caring Helov
I just might have to say thank you for this topic and I am very sure that you are more aware of what is the truth of what is going on in our present now is the same thing as I have been hearing you speak about since I first saw you.
I have been told all my life that I am too emotional. It drives me crazy cause I cannot change it. I have however learned more about my emotions & what triggers which over the years. I get emotional over everything. If you don't notice my emotions over something than it has to be cause I don't know about it lol it kinda makes me wonder when I don't see emotions in others.
This video, answers so much of my childhood
Teal, this whole video is like a virtual book. Like a pocket read. Quality and quantitative. Much Love to you & your family.
Brilliant said
This video is absolutely amazing. This is the type of stuff we should of learned about in school! I’m 39 years old and I am just finally understanding to accept and feel my emotions. It’s the heartbeat of relationships. I thank you so much for your extensive videos on these topics that are so vital. Many blessings to you. From the core of my being I thank you. ❤️🙏🙏❤️
My parents would punish me if I was good especially if I was standing up for someone they were hitting or trying to be a peace maker. I can't be the only one. Thank you Teal, you have opened my eyes to how messed up my scapegoated childhood really was.....
I can see that you're a great parent Teal!
I came from the other video (How to Stop Caring What Other People Think). I'm glad I watched this video. From childhood on up, people have told me I'm 'too sensitive'. I'm an adult now and find myself struggling with a lot of challenges. After watching your videos, though, I realize what the root of the problem is and how it relates to my current issues. Thank you so much for shredding some light. At least it's a starting point for me. From there, I can find ways to overcome my challenges.
I think I have never been more understood in my life, I'm so glad and excited to be able to listen to Teal's videos. It has such soothing effect on my soul - I'm really grateful for being acknowledged
Nice way to break down A LOT! Great for anyone struggling, from just about anything, to watch. Great focus on REAL communication.
How can anybody disagree with what this woman is saying right now??? If you do, find the root cause of that disagreement, analyze it, and respond with respect and a genuine want for answers. This has helped me on my spiritual journey where I have come to think that cutting my emotions will help me get a better grip of self when in fact that is the opposite. wow.. We really did invent the internet to find ourselves.
I want to thank you so much, even my dark self even cried internally....
Love this SO SO much. Emotional health IS health. I can't wait to see how the increase in understanding of emotional health and 'emotional intelligence' transforms parenting culture, after the emotional dark ages come to an end...
I have been binging Teal videos over the past month. they always seem to be recommend to me at the right time.
(I couldn't help but be tickled to see my current city, Victoria (British Columbia), in the video at 1:43. In the distance, we see the Empress Hotel with the Canadian flag.)
Teal I feel like you are speaking directly to me in many of these videos, the message is so right on and I identify with what you say intimately.
I love how Teal not only understands what is going on with emotions, but offers really good practical advice on how to deal with them in a healthy way.
Wouldn't say that I would ever watch a video on a spiritual channel but this video was exactly what I needed to hear right now. Everything resonated with me on a deep level.
This is so deep. I'm so grateful of watching this video. I have taken tons of notes and going back and forth, making sure I didn't miss anything. Thank you so much Teal. 🙏🙏🙏
Me too!
Ok so I was raised in a physically fine, but emotionally co-dependent environment. Thing is now I see it all came from all the best intentions and love available at the time.
aka...Not everyone learns how to give and receive unconditional love in this lifetime...but everyone has the potential ♻️
So I wasn’t wrong for all this time! Thank you 🙏 have been struggling with this since I’m 6 years old
This is such an amazing video on so many levels. I spent many years in the church, and one thing they teach is don't trust your emotions and don't trust your feelings, trust God. Have fellowship with people you don't resonate with, just because they're Christians too. Since coming away from the church, I can now see how rigid, analytical and judgemental many of the people are - ironically especially the women, because they've suppressed their feminine energy, in order to survive in a man's world - which I came to realise the church is. Over past year I've become more empowered and energised since trusting my emotions and feelings.
9 years how are you? This resonates
This is what I have always, always believed in. And I have always been told it's wrong, until now.
Profound video with a profound effect on me. Ty ma'am. I believe you're helping me from afar in a way that noone has. I feel like I'm slowly letting down my wall. To have someone define how I feel to a Tee is amazing. The isolation is dissipating. The gifts God gave you to probe into a damaged person is unreal & I hope he blesses you tenfold.
Time outs can cause great damage too, honestly. It made me feel abandoned and rejected and left me to my own devices to regulate my emotions (which I could not yet do, so this caused a lot of damage). I'm still working through this today, trying to undo the damage my parents did to me by shoving me away whenever I showed an emotion they perceived as negative.
I wish I could hug you! I’ve been trying to figure myself out and a lot of my thoughts were confirmed through you. Thank you love and blessings to you!
I just want to say thank you because you helped me understand myself and also helped me understand how to be a good parent cause I myself disapprove of my sons emotions and you helped me to know that ,that is wrong and I am glad that he is still young so I can try to undo all the damage I had already caused 😞
Oh no, don't feel bad you didn't mean any harm!
YES PLEASE
Dear Diary, I know I've merely seen two videos but I am in fact in Amor.. What a beautiful, well spoken/meaning individual!
YOU WOKE ME UP EMOTIONALY! THANKS
Thank you
Absolutely healing video. Teal's voice can be felt as coming from her heart, the heart of every human who has suffered emotionally in some way in some point in their lives. I sometimes wish i could go back in time and heal everything i did wrong, everytime i couldnt hold a person i loved, everytime i couldnt be there 100% supporting them and my own growth as a whole man in the process. They say we learn through error, and hopefully we all are transcending to an age where we can learn from unraveling like this beautiful blossoming of nature's intelligence.
Just heard previously from teal, it took parents until the 1600's before the understood the concept of reward/punishment to raise their kids. An awakening about the true nature of a child's mind and behavior.
Now, 2022, we are at the cusp of realizing the emotionality of our own existence as "sentient" adult human beings.
The wheels of time and conciseness move very very slowly. Be patient, my friend.
Dos Equis. 🌝
I'm very glad I found this video, Explains my childhood to a T. Thanks for the help Teal!
You have so Much wisdom in you.
I love you Teal, goodnight 💕
Words fail me, except to say that you're a global treasure. As one who struggles with gratitude and humility, no problems here and now. Thank you indeed!
This helped me be aware of my immedite reaction to try to give advice to my partner and friends without truly taking moments to vlaidate their emotions because mine were never acknowledged, considered or given advice so I thought advice was what I was supposed to do and as I go back into memories, I'm realizing it's been slowly alienating them from feelign ocmfortable telling me their emotions. Idk if i explained this well but long story short, thank you .
Thank you! 🕉️🤍💜✨
That "Spare the rod spoil the child" BS came out of a misunderstanding of Psalms 23's actually loving verbiage, "Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me." Rather than being used to whack the sheep into submission, a shepherd uses the straight end of the rod to guide the sheep and the hooked end to get sheep unstuck from between boulders where they may have wandered. The (still current) understanding of the rod as an instrument of beatings promoted by the bible, belays a primitive mindset many Christians and others still hold of a God who arbitrarily rains down punishment at will. In addition to the miseducation of our ancestors, this belief that God cannot be trusted has also done humanity a world of harm. Hopefully we're getting smarter as a race. Thank you Teal 💕😇❤
My heart breaks for me... As I continue on my 56 year journey to heal and grow, this just breaks my huge heart for the little girl I was, who endured.... Despite herself. Thank you, Teal. I resonate so much with who you are
I just adore your bravery in speaking out as you do. Your wisdom blesses us all. You are a huge force
This is how I parent and it is not only liberated my children but it’s also taught me the simplicity of not controlling my emotions with the mind. Now I accept myself as I am and allow both old emotions and new emotions to flow freely without analysis/judgement/criticism. Life changing expansion….
Thanks for all you do. You are making the world a better place.
I’m crying here at the 23 mins mark… about doing things to ‘be there’ for the other person be it emotionally being available to understand how they feel or helping them with dishes, other chores as opposed to having to be asked to do these things to touching them, hugging them telling them that they matter!
Excellent! Total TRUTH.
Thanks Teal
this really made me feel much better !! im 18 years old and all my parents do is scream at me and never try to listen to me when i talk . everytime i want to talk to my mom shes busy watching tv or talking on the phone . she never makes time for me or ever asks me how i feel. when me and my little sister fight she assumes its me and screams at me , never once has she asked me how i feel or what happened . i try to explain myself but she starts screaming at me and saying she doesnt care , its very annoying
po7378 I'm 60 & I can still remember how I was treated just like you are being treated. I was always being spanked, scolded, or accused of something I didn't do. And insulted too but I survived with prayer & rebellious ways i guess😳
Thank You Teal For Your Help!
This is GOLD ❤️❤️❤️ Thank you from the bottom of my heart Teal Swan ✨🙏✨
Home schooling is helpful as we can help them be led by their emotions and desires.