Comedy in Place - Episode #32: Phun with Physics
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- Опубликовано: 30 апр 2020
- Comedy in Place - Episode #32
Phun with Physics!
As a Nerd and Engineer (is that redundant?), I have always lived by the Laws of Physics. But do these sound scientific principles apply to everyday life? Turns out - NOT always. In today's episode, I try to apply three of the best known Laws of Physics to my personal life with mixed results.
Also in this episode, I use the Doppler Effect to try and beat a traffic ticket. It works, but the results are less than optimal.
Be Well. Be safe! Keep Laughing!
"Comedy in Place" is Don McMillan's Comedy Show from Home! We need to laugh more than ever right now - hopefully a daily dose of "Comedy in Place" will help get you through the day. To BOOK Don for your event (LIVE or Virtual Show) go to "www.technicallyfunny.com" 
Приколы
Two atoms were walking along. One atom says to the other, “You look. A little down. What seems to be the matter?”.
The other atom said with a frown, “I lost an electron.”
“Are you sure?”.
“I’m positive.”
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Love it!!!!
My favorite!
A little down?
Let me make you up a Fermion.
(A quark "joke".)
"Ah, you should keep a better ion them"
I'm old and retired and the Law of Inertia doesn't apply. My bowels are in motion even when I'm at rest...
Today I learned: One can write almost ten minutes of material as a rebuttal to an argument one has with their spouse over the "emptiness" of a tube of toothpaste.
"The Big Bang theory is happening in that kid's diaper." That's comedy gold!!! 😜🤣😂
Shouldve been called phun with fysics
That's phunny as phuck!
Well that's what I see in the thumbnail
The Doppler bit was great, as soon as I heard "traffic signal" I thought, "Yeah, blue shift can get you out of that one but the speeding ticket will wreck you."
my physics teacher made me calculate the speeding fine required assuming that you saw a red light when it really green.
I'm a designer engineer from Russia and I usually don't like stand-up, but yours jokes are great!))
" [...] do what many engineers do..."
Me:
Throw away 90% of the math and science, round up to nearest integer and call it a day?
I'm an engineer.
HAHAHAHA! 🤣🤣🤣 Thanks for your Comedy in Place! I look forward to them, and they are a fun part of my day! Have a Great weekend!👍😊
Here’s one. “An object at rest will remain at rest until acted upon by an unbalanced force. an object in motion will remain in motion until acted upon by an unbalanced force” it’s true. I’ve been in my bed, and when my mom says *”GET YOUR LAZY ASS OUTA BED RIGHT NOW”* I’d suddenly move down my ladder at light speed And I’d be aimlessly wandering, and my mom tells me to sit down. You’ve never seen something stop that suddenly.
Good job on AGT. Here's hoping things take off for you!
That was great man.
So good! thanks!!!
8:30 - How to turn a simple failure to stop ticket into criminal speeding ticket.
At that speed, you'd need to be driving upside down on the ceiling to even be able to drive in the first place. You'd achieve orbit before going fast enough that a red light Doppler shifts to green.
This is just awesome😂🤣🤣
I thought the first physics joke ended with "but it only works for spherical cows in a vacuum".
Neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. He gets his beer and asks How Much. Bartender goes;" for you, no charge"
The joke about inertia - now I know why it doesn't gather momentum.
Another example of conservation of matter not working is - no matter how careful you are, socks will inevitably disappear in washing.
On the other end of spectrum, you will inevitably end up with a collection of tupperware lids that don't fit any of your containers.
I guess tupperware lids suffer decay and transmute into other tupperare lids.
Pray you never come before a traffic court judge who holds a physics degree.
Destruction of matter: "Baby have you seen my favorite tee shirt?" "The old one with all the holes in it? I didn't think you needed it anymore."
These are great.
You could do a talk on the venturi effect and how the larger vs smaller openings work in accordance with the orifices.
Heisenberg and Schrodinger are driving down the highway when a policeman sees them speed by. He gives chase and pulls them over. He walks up to the driver side window and asks Heisenberg, "do you have any idea how fast you were going?" Heisenberg answers, "no, I'm uncertain." This irritates the officer who orders them out of the car so he can search it. After searching the trunk he walks up to the men and says, "Do you know there is a dead cat in the trunk of your car?" Schrodinger exclaims, "you killed my cat!"
Awesome to know that my toothpaste tube isn't the only one creating matter! LoL super funny 😄
It works ten times better for dog food.
Newton's law of gravity would definetely work with my wife lol
I saw Don on America's Got Talent. Funny Stuff.
_1st Physics joke_ well that's bold claim...
An elementary particle drives a car, gets pulled over by cops:
- Sir, you were doing 80 mph!
- Damn man, thanks thanks a lot? Now I have no f¥€king idea where I am!!!
What's the 1st rule of thermodynamics❓
*You don't talk about thermodynamics❗❗❗*
"An Atom walks into a bar" should be on a t-shirt.
There once was a young lady named Mary White, Whose speed was much faster than light, She set out one day, In a relative way, And returned on the previous night! 🤣🤣
Was she doing a Mobius strip?
@@DanSchallerforPOTUS No, it's a misunderstanding of time dilation in special relativity. People think you'll move backward in time, if you move faster than light. The truth is, you'll move in an imaginary time direction, according to the equation of time dilation.
Scansion needs work.
When we went to Disney when I was probably 5 my younger brother. I'm assuming was 3 at the time was the little kid who kicked the crap out of the seat in front of him. My dad was sitting next to him (mentally suffering) trying to get him to stop probably the whole flight. He thought the guy was going to hit him. Luckily for him he didn't, otherwise story would've started off better
Two kittens are on a roof, one fell off. Why is that? It did not have enough mew ( u )
4:50
But:
Relativity theory does apply here.
Masses bend light.
Because:
If you gain enough weight, everyone looks at you to catch that bent light...
(I hope, I mentioned the right physics phenomenon.)
The more important part is how tiny the big G is, and how insignificant it is between human bodies. It's less than the weight of a hair.
I thought he meant "phun" as in "pun"😂
The law of gravity does indeed work.... I would not have spent a decade with a bodybuilder otherwise. I also managed do prove Boyle's law in this relationship.... it turned out that if you bottle things up... the receptacle will eventually explode.
I like the way he states the laws half way then make the joke... If you actually don't know the law, you won't even notice that it's incomplete...
I'm trying to figure out why you never got a gig on Big Bang theory. You could obviously have been Sheldon Cooper's real dad.
You are amazing! The next bit you need to work on is pie charts, graps of all sorts, chances and odds, etc. of all the differences being on AGT and how it changed your life.
Even though you didn't win, you have won on a bigger level.
You have likely seen a huge increase in views on all your YT videos.
You have likely found more gigs including corporate gigs.
You have done all that and didn't have to sign a contract with AGT.
$40,000/year netting about $25 000/year is nice but isn't the end-all be-all.
I believe, Don is funny, but then again I'm an engineer. I find a lot of things funny or sad that others don't, like political parties - they aren't fun and no one who isn't in one want to be in one.
I am the same way with my toothpaste tube.
Shampoo bottles make more shampoo as well.
You forgot the mass of earth
🤑🤑that’s a gigantic speeding ticket.
😂😂😂😂
The joke about being attracted the more the closer you get to the person could will work with a female physicist though.
Gravity law still holds if you assume that males have a negative mass.
BTW, I am here because of AGT.
Of course the conservation of matter is false and is so easily disproven. Consider the large number of coat hangers that must be very heavy vs the relatively fewer number of lightweight socks that vanish. Obviously the socks are being transmuted into coat hangers but with a huge loss of mass. Take that, physicists!
I'm sorry to say, we in the hard sciences used to make fun of engineering students. A civil engineer is a construction worker with a diploma. A chemical engineer is a cook with a diploma. a mechanical engineer is Joe the mechanic with a diploma. An electrical engineer is an electrician with a diploma. A computer engineer is a gamer with a diploma.
Very funny jokes, I had a great laugh, but sorry to say I propably know why Newton's law didn't work to attract women. You must have asked a physicist, and she didn't want a man who said exponentially when it's not. It is a power funktion (r to the power of minus 2).
5:30 Get the joke, just to note, You just said is wrong mass cannot be created nor destroyed, part missing -> unless it's transofmed to equal ammount of energy and that ammount is E=mc2
When mass is destroyed, then energy is released, and that happens when atom is split am i correct?
I guess I can't claim this is the first Physics joke. But here it is ...
What do you get when you cross a mountain climber with a skier?
Nothing. ... why?
Because a mountain climber is a scaler.
No, it goes:
What do you get when you cross a rock climber with a mosquito?
Trick question! Everyone knows you can't cross a scaler with a vector.
@@rosiefay7283 yes, I've heard it that way. But the way I tell it reveals who the Real Engineers/Physicists are in the room. It causes them to think, how does "scaler" fit into this? And the "manager types" don't remember.
I'm dumb. Could you please explain this?
@@jplum7708 To perform the mathematical operation of a Cross Product, referred to most often as A Cross, you have to have two Vector Quantities. You can't perform a Cross on a scalar quantity.
Sounds like a math joke
Physics phun is what happened on 9 11
3:30 SERIOUS quesion, no joke, WHAT IS SPEED OF GRAVITY? Does this varies if particle is in motion, what is speed, Does it means that gravity have unlimited speed? If so then Einstein "relativity" is invalid, only apply to low distances and small "things", electromagnetism is then not fundamental. Althoug invalid common sense, matematically speaking it makes sense, it's based on lorentz work anyway, just aether removed, Since every particle does attract, influence other via electric field, and magnectic if it's in motion. Therefore,Einstein is correct in small distance 100% , in practice at small distance, that doesnt apply to galactics, and black holes? Amd i correct? Does that change anything? What about twin brother paradox, dont laught at me :>
i ask teoretically speaking,
no object in our universe can speed up to such speed i suppoe, too much stuff , too random, well maybe on orbit of black hole, when it moves toward pol is jetsoned,
simple put again = what is speed of gravity?
check one of playlists about quantium mechanics, einstein, hope it's public, this is what keeps me thinking
They wanted to detect waves gravitional waves but that detected movement of giant objects, rather than speed of gravity. Unless they measured slope of sinusoid, both slopes, shuld be different slope depending object moves further away or closer they can measure giant objects orbits like two giant starst
Do youi know guy name Unzickier Real Physics here on YT? Just that one thing keeps me ponder
from common sense perspective, logically speakin uderstand how doopler effect is substaciated by einstein / poincare equations it makes sense matematically, small distansec mass, doesn't practically IMO
I mean paraxoxes in einstein non relativity
Ну так себе шутеечки, честно ожидал большего.
Yawn.