The relationship between the sister and her assistant is not grooming. He said he never would have crossed the line if she hadn’t confessed and made it difficult to ignore. He wasn’t in romantic love with her as a child. She is 31 years old and he is probably 45. Also he became her assistant when she was an adult not as a child. He was assistant to her “father” when she was a child.
I hate how people treat age gap relationships. First off, It’s very clear that the assistant never had intentions to pursue her. The assumption that she’s a victim because she’s younger is insane. It’s clear that she nor he ever had romantic feelings for each other until she was an adult specifically when he became her assistant. This assumption that he was looking at her at age 6 is absurd & reaching. When I first watched this series I never got the vibe that she was groomed, or that there was anything weird about their relationship considering she’s the one who was pushing herself upon him & expressing how she felt about him. Blatantly pursuing him. While they are both two consenting adults. But hey, some people always try to find the negative in everything unfortunately.
@lisajohnson6857 A recurring theme definitely. Glad to know it’s not just me who notices. 😪 Some people just exude certain things. But hey everyone has an opinion I guess! 🚮😂
Ok guys so the reason we take a closer look at age gap relationships is not because of the mathematics, rather it’s because of POWER and the ways power can be mobilised to cause harm. We therefore scrutinise age gap CPs to see where power lies: -how is it denominated (is greater physical strength of the younger than the older neutral; what about a power differential arising from greater wealth - is this neutral?); -who is wielding that power and in what direction - is the more powerful person using their advantage to secure their own interests and deny agency to the less powerful as in Cutie Pie and KP, or is power redistributed in a way that benefits the one who entered the relationship with less social power, thereby reducing the power differential as in Unforgotten Night? -Who pursues and is it safe for the person with less social power to refuse the relationship as in Cherry Magic 2nd CP? These particulars matter more than a blanket personal discomfort caused by adding or subtracting numbers. What is the context of power and how is it being leveraged is central to assessing risk. Always assuming the younger person is automatically a victim at risk of harm because of age, really obscures the far more powerful predictors of harm - gender, race and class. For example most murders - the ultimate harm, within relationships are on the basis of Gender - of Women in relationships with Men even when they’re identical ages yet society still encourages this. These murders add up to tens of millions around the world. How many millions of murders do we know are caused by age gaps? Lets look at risks lesser than murder - loss of limbs, rendered homeless or in poverty, loss of career opportunities, loss of children - how many millions attributed to age gaps versus to gender as a source of unequal power? Ok. Gro**ming is a very specific clinical and legal term and we should be careful of not contributing to dangerous environments by removing meaning from these serious issues while directing attention away from much more consequential abuses of social hierarchies just because they are encouraged by patriarchy and we have internalised these egregious and ubiquitous abuses of power. This consideration is especially relevant in BL where writers Impose age gaps because gender, potentially the most predictive of serious harm between CPs, is not an issue between two men to the same degree. Wealth gaps and even height/physical strengths gaps are standard sources of power and inequality inserted by BL authors to give the MM CPs exaggerated social differences and even personal conflicts, to be resolved over the course of the storytelling 💕
@@FemmesReact Grooming is a gravely serious problem in society and deserves to be treated with the seriousness it warrants. A personal squick is not equivalent to moral reasoning so lets use these words with respect. That’s the way to honour actual victims of sexual crime and sexual abuse Oh yes, Trapped is one of my all-time top BLs!
In my opinion, Tang Yi has never looked at Tang Guo-dong other than as a father figure. So their relationship isn't weird for me. He just feels a deep respect for the man. And because his childhood environment before meeting him was the worst, he finally felt like he belonged somewhere. The fact that someone killed the man he learned to love as a father, made him cold and broken even more. Just my thoughts on Tang Yi. ☺ I don't think the girl (I don't remember her name) was in love with Tang Guo-dong either. More like she had a weird infatuation but nothing more.
Oh, I think I misunderstood what you said. I didn't realize that the guy she has feelings for was Tang Guo-dong's right-hand man before being Tang Yi's. I thought you were talking about her and Tang Guo-dong. Indeed, the age difference seems to be significant if the man we see in the flashback is the same as the one in the present. It's a bit strange because in the present, the age difference doesn't seem to be that big.
The way we discuss and understand the salience of age gaps is very important for queer, inter-cultural communities. Linking a good video on that discussion for queer people who could benefit from better understanding of the current moral panic and why the words gr**mer and ped*** are in such prominent but inaccurate use in the Anglosphere at the moment and how not to add to this anti-queer propaganda ruclips.net/video/frZHD6aITcg/видео.html Caelan Conrad also has a series of well researched YT videos on the way this powerfully seductive gr**mer and ped***file rhetoric stems from conservative anti-gay and anti-trans rhetoric, and has sometimes been mobilised even inside the queer community against itself. 💕
I love the discussions you guys have, but…. Please pause! You miss so much and stop paying attention to important details when you start going off on tangents. Again don’t mind, just saying before you say something hit pause.
The relationship between the sister and her assistant is not grooming. He said he never would have crossed the line if she hadn’t confessed and made it difficult to ignore. He wasn’t in romantic love with her as a child. She is 31 years old and he is probably 45. Also he became her assistant when she was an adult not as a child. He was assistant to her “father” when she was a child.
exactly!!!!
I hate how people treat age gap relationships. First off, It’s very clear that the assistant never had intentions to pursue her. The assumption that she’s a victim because she’s younger is insane. It’s clear that she nor he ever had romantic feelings for each other until she was an adult specifically when he became her assistant. This assumption that he was looking at her at age 6 is absurd & reaching. When I first watched this series I never got the vibe that she was groomed, or that there was anything weird about their relationship considering she’s the one who was pushing herself upon him & expressing how she felt about him. Blatantly pursuing him. While they are both two consenting adults. But hey, some people always try to find the negative in everything unfortunately.
@lisajohnson6857 A recurring theme definitely. Glad to know it’s not just me who notices. 😪 Some people just exude certain things. But hey everyone has an opinion I guess! 🚮😂
Ok guys so the reason we take a closer look at age gap relationships is not because of the mathematics, rather it’s because of POWER and the ways power can be mobilised to cause harm.
We therefore scrutinise age gap CPs to see where power lies:
-how is it denominated (is greater physical strength of the younger than the older neutral; what about a power differential arising from greater wealth - is this neutral?);
-who is wielding that power and in what direction - is the more powerful person using their advantage to secure their own interests and deny agency to the less powerful as in Cutie Pie and KP, or is power redistributed in a way that benefits the one who entered the relationship with less social power, thereby reducing the power differential as in Unforgotten Night?
-Who pursues and is it safe for the person with less social power to refuse the relationship as in Cherry Magic 2nd CP?
These particulars matter more than a blanket personal discomfort caused by adding or subtracting numbers. What is the context of power and how is it being leveraged is central to assessing risk.
Always assuming the younger person is automatically a victim at risk of harm because of age, really obscures the far more powerful predictors of harm - gender, race and class. For example most murders - the ultimate harm, within relationships are on the basis of Gender - of Women in relationships with Men even when they’re identical ages yet society still encourages this. These murders add up to tens of millions around the world. How many millions of murders do we know are caused by age gaps? Lets look at risks lesser than murder - loss of limbs, rendered homeless or in poverty, loss of career opportunities, loss of children - how many millions attributed to age gaps versus to gender as a source of unequal power? Ok.
Gro**ming is a very specific clinical and legal term and we should be careful of not contributing to dangerous environments by removing meaning from these serious issues while directing attention away from much more consequential abuses of social hierarchies just because they are encouraged by patriarchy and we have internalised these egregious and ubiquitous abuses of power.
This consideration is especially relevant in BL where writers Impose age gaps because gender, potentially the most predictive of serious harm between CPs, is not an issue between two men to the same degree. Wealth gaps and even height/physical strengths gaps are standard sources of power and inequality inserted by BL authors to give the MM CPs exaggerated social differences and even personal conflicts, to be resolved over the course of the storytelling 💕
Thanks for taking the time to write this out and also good to see you’re still watching us 💜
@@FemmesReact Grooming is a gravely serious problem in society and deserves to be treated with the seriousness it warrants. A personal squick is not equivalent to moral reasoning so lets use these words with respect. That’s the way to honour actual victims of sexual crime and sexual abuse
Oh yes, Trapped is one of my all-time top BLs!
Yesss so happy ! That's really the reaction series I'm waiting for these days
In my opinion, Tang Yi has never looked at Tang Guo-dong other than as a father figure. So their relationship isn't weird for me. He just feels a deep respect for the man. And because his childhood environment before meeting him was the worst, he finally felt like he belonged somewhere. The fact that someone killed the man he learned to love as a father, made him cold and broken even more. Just my thoughts on Tang Yi. ☺ I don't think the girl (I don't remember her name) was in love with Tang Guo-dong either. More like she had a weird infatuation but nothing more.
Oh, I think I misunderstood what you said. I didn't realize that the guy she has feelings for was Tang Guo-dong's right-hand man before being Tang Yi's. I thought you were talking about her and Tang Guo-dong. Indeed, the age difference seems to be significant if the man we see in the flashback is the same as the one in the present. It's a bit strange because in the present, the age difference doesn't seem to be that big.
I've noticed in Taiwanese BLs only the last wish is not said out loud. I think
The way we discuss and understand the salience of age gaps is very important for queer, inter-cultural communities.
Linking a good video on that discussion for queer people who could benefit from better understanding of the current moral panic and why the words gr**mer and ped*** are in such prominent but inaccurate use in the Anglosphere at the moment and how not to add to this anti-queer propaganda ruclips.net/video/frZHD6aITcg/видео.html
Caelan Conrad also has a series of well researched YT videos on the way this powerfully seductive gr**mer and ped***file rhetoric stems from conservative anti-gay and anti-trans rhetoric, and has sometimes been mobilised even inside the queer community against itself. 💕
It's not a Taiwanese BL if there isn't a birthday cake scene🤭
Heeyyyy
I love the discussions you guys have, but…. Please pause! You miss so much and stop paying attention to important details when you start going off on tangents. Again don’t mind, just saying before you say something hit pause.